Original subtitles

Yes, bravo! Thanks!

-One to zero. -No! Two-zero.

-"Two-zero"? -Yeah.

-For me. -The horse carriage.

The horse carriage!

Very funny! We don't have the same sense of humor.

Look! A stain.

-What? -Gotcha!

My word!

That made me laugh.

Understandable. That was really funny.

That was funny! I've never seen anything so funny. Good job.

Enough! We're wasting time.

We have to clean this again.

I have my second Pure Strength class tonight.

Let's get to work.

-You get to work! -Oh!

I make the decisions.

Okay. But I'm the second decision-maker.

-I don't care. -I'm sorry.

Mr. I-Make-All-The-Decisions. Get ready for the decisions.

Get ready for the decisions.

-Dammit. -What's going on?

-I just cleaned this. -And?

It's dirty again. There are bubbles again.

You need to clean it.

There we go.

-What now? -I cleaned it twice.

-So? -Twice.

Once. Then, dirty again. Twice. Dirty again.

-There… -That's strange.

That's really new.

That's not true.

Someone's making my window dirty.

Behind what?

Behind you. On three…

One…

Two…

Three!

He left. He got away. He heard.

You spoke and he heard. He disappeared through a trapdoor.

Well, shit!

-Where was he? -Right underneath.

Incredible!

That's intense.

Very intense.

That's intense, but you're blind. Are you joking?

There's only us two in this thing. Do I have to keep telling you?

Look. See?

Here we go! Who did that?

I did. I've been doing it. Can't you see that it's me?

You've been doing it this whole time!

Now that I know who did it, I can clean without fear.

In complete peace.

-They're still there? -They're always there.

You see the little one?

He's in love with me. Has been for two months.

-He even gave me cubes of cheese. -How'd he do that?

He stuck them to the window.

It's the thought that counts.

He's incredibly gifted at reading lips.

Well, that's what he thinks.

How's it going? You're cute, but you're a bit of an idiot.

What did she say?

"You're cute, but you're a little Breton."

She's in love with me. She said I was cute.

But she also said, "You're a little Breton."

Better to be a little Breton, than wish you were one.

That's right. Don't start with me.

There's a copy for each of your cousins.

Thanks, Sylvie. You can go.

I can stay for the Board of Directors meeting.

No. You can go. Enjoy your weekend.

You're excused from the meeting.

Okay. Well…

I hope it goes better than last year with Mr. Lanceval.

My uncle's a funny guy sometimes.

Even so, a slap in the face because of the color of a folder…

It's no big deal.

What?

Have a good weekend, Sylvie.

"Goat wool, Séverine."

Okay, yes. Okay. I'd like to.

What do you see in her?

-She's not my type. -Really?

Makes sense.

Your type doesn't exist. Have you seen your face and arms?

They're so skinny, you're practically see-through.

I'm skinny?

Yeah.

Let me tell you, in six months…

In six months, I'll look like that.

Peter Mac Calloway.

Thanks to his program rich in "protidiens."

-"Proleteins." -"Proleteins."

It might be hard to pronounce,

but I'm gonna have "must-cles."

Munchles.

Manscles.

-Mustcles -Muscles.

I'm gonna have muscles.

Shut up, will ya? That's great.

How are you?

How are you, you fool?

Food.

Food?

Let's get some food together?

Yes. Okay, funny.

Friday? Today's Friday!

She's inviting me to dinner tonight.

Okay. See you tonight.

Ouch.

What? Think you're perfect?

You've never knocked yourself out while cleaning a window

on Montparnasse Tower?

Wake up! Let's go.

Look here.

-What are you doing? -That's at least 14 kg of water.

Really?

Be careful.

Be careful there.

There's no danger.

Jean-Louis?

How old are you?

Just a little joke for the weekend.

Guarding an empty tower isn't much fun.

I'm making the most of the time.

The bigwigs will be here in ten minutes.

Stop joking around.

Mr. Lanceval doesn't appreciate them much.

No, but you didn't laugh because

I didn't have my whole outfit.

With this on,

I'll be a hit.

It was just some advice in case you wanna keep your job.

Don't worry. I understand.

It's always the same with these big shots.

Until they get shot.

Montparnasse Tower. How can I help you?

I don't get it. I already did it with two buckets of water.

I'm sorry.

-Did you say something? -No, Mr. Lanceval.

You could have greeted us.

Hi.

Idiot!

"Imbecile."

Excuse me?

Nothing.

I said, "Have a good trip."

In the elevator.

Let's go.

Miss Lanceval? They're heading up!

Sorry. Excuse me. Miss Lanceval,

they're heading up.

-Hello, Uncle. -Good evening.

There you have it.

I heard that my aunt is ill. I hope it isn't serious.

This is a nice shade of blue.

For once you've done things correctly.

I'm gonna be late for dinner with Marie-Jo.

In 15 minutes, I have my second Pure Strength class.

"In 15 minutes, I have my second Pure Strength class."

It's a step glutes class tonight.

"It's a step glutes class tonight."

It's a bit more important than your dinner.

"It's a bit more important than your dinner."

Don't start that game. We could go all night.

Your little childish game is gonna annoy me.

Hey!

Don't start playing that game because…

It's been a long time…

And… Childish! So stop it right now.

Do you have the document from your mother?

-Here it is, Dad. -Good.

Let's get started with the half-year results.

Stéphanie, the numbers.

-I'm an idiot. -"I'm an idiot."

-Poo is delicious! -"Poo is delicious!"

You're a bit like a president.

Reception? Unlock.

Spare me your heroic actions, take your seats,

put out your cigarettes and shut up.

-Why did it do that? -Did you touch something?

-No. It was you. -Ouch!

If you want to shoot in the tower, don't shoot at the windows.

But if you wanna make some noise…

Do it with this.

This…

This is what that's for.

What's going on? There's a problem.

I hope Marie-Joëlle isn't late.

Is that is? Is it over?

Can we go home, please?

There's a problem.

What are you doing? Are you crazy? Stop!

Calm down a bit. Calm down.

Are you crazy?

I take Pure Strength classes.

I can take action if there's danger.

But there…

-Me! -Yes?

What should we do?

What should we do…

First rule: assess the situation.

Find out what's going on.

St. Augustine, God of Bee Gees, give us the strength…

What? Pick me!

-Yes. -What is it?

Nothing. A little squabble between secretaries.

They're annoying each other. It's not our business. Let's go.

I feel like you're hiding something.

No. Nothing.

We're all gonna die, that's all. Let's go.

Is Marie-Joëlle dead?

Is Marie-Joëlle in danger? Is she sick?

Is she gone? Is she on vacation?

Marie-Joëlle's revenge?

It's 9 p.m. I'm tired. I have class in 15 minutes.

We didn't see anything. But I'm gonna ask you

to whisper when we pass the room where there's a hostage-taking.

Cause getting shot would piss me off.

They took her by her hair. Come on, go up!

Okay. I'll continue.

I need the code. You're gonna give it to me. We'll take the money.

While we do that, you're gonna sip pineapple Malibu cocktails.

An hour later, we'll set you free

and everyone goes home calmly.

Or I kill you all one by one,

ladies first, of course.

The code?

Five…

Four…

Three…

Two…

One.

I feel like it was something important.

You would have told me.

When you said, "It's 9 p.m."?

Is that what's important?

9 p.m. is an important time.

It's time to go to sleep.

I remember once I went to bed at 12:10 a.m.

I was so tired the next day!

No! I know!

It was when you said, "a hostage-taking." Hostages?

It's a hostage-taking!

Marie-Joëlle is a hostage Why didn't you tell me?

Marie-Joëlle! Oh my God!

You seem very sensitive.

That was just your niece, after all.

Shall we move on to your children now?

Sixty…

Sixty…

Sixty-five meters.

Are you okay? What are you doing?

What's wrong with you?

What are you doing? This isn't our problem.

This isn't our problem today?

On the day that happens to be my dinner date with Marie-Joëlle.

I opened it!

Come on! Let's go.

Yes, okay.

Jesus, Arabic God, Italian God,

give me the strength to save Marie-Joëlle.

Hasta la vista, bye bye.

Hans? What's going on?

Check the floors and the roof.

It's time to prove

that I didn't waste 3,200 francs on those classes.

May the force of Peter Mac Calloway be with me!

Well. That's done. Okay.

I have trouble with this kind of strength.

I'll have to tell Peter.

Five…

Four…

Three…

Two…

-One… -58-228, pound sign.

There we go. That wasn't so hard.

Nope. I'm not dead.

Look. Got this at Mercier.

It has a sack with blood and an iron sheet

to protect me. Pretty cool special effects.

But don't worry.

For 50 million, I would have done the same.

There's still family members left.

Uncles, cousins.

Okay. Here we go.

There we go. Good.

Sorry! No!

Oh shit! Stop…

Oh damn! Yes, there we go.

You can't do anything without my wife.

What are you talking about?

Her hand's enough.

Her absence caused a delay,

but she'll be here soon. She'll be here right away.

You're monsters.

That's not a pretty picture.

Can you shut him up, please?

Is everything ready?

It won't be much longer.

I think you're ready for some pineapple Malibu cocktails.

Man on the roof.

I'll take care of it.

-What's going on? -Nothing serious.

One of my guys is on it.

You don't have everything under control?

Yes, I do.

Everything will work out. Don't worry.

I hope so. That's what I'm paying for, after all.

Oh damn!

That must hurt.

Be careful!

Watch out! Gently.

-Come back… -Hey!

We're window washers.

Don't worry. Everything's fine.

Hans? Did you take care of the problem?

Hans, what the hell are you doing?

Hans? Can you hear me, Hans?

Peter, go get Hans from the roof.

I want you both to go with him.

Everything isn't going as you planned.

Hans!

Hans, respond!

Stop! I don't have anything!

Let me warn you

that if you touch even so much as a hair on Marie-Joëlle's head,

you're gonna pay for it.

Stop it!

He was joking! He doesn't even know you.

Do whatever you want. We're leaving.

That's it. Don't worry about us. "Porte Maillot,

two minutes!" I have to go. My subway's here.

That's not exactly true.

I wouldn't want to be you right now. I'm gonna--

Don't you understand what's going on? Can't you see?

Don't you see the gun? The bearded guy?

The red walkie-talkie? Don't you see all that?

Isn't this strange?

We need to get out of here. Let's call the police. Hello?

Hello? Police?

Hello?

Hello?

Hello?

My word! This must be worth at least a million!

This would be a nice gift for Marie-Joëlle.

What?

Tonight, we're making you…

Tonight, we're making you…

Pasta

Tonight, we're making you…

Tonight, we're making you pasta

Tonight, we're making you…

Calm down.

It's okay.

Hans is unconscious. The detonator and walkie-talkie are gone.

Find who did this and kill them.

I think we're dealing with professionals.

Marie-Joëlle.

They tortured her. She's bleeding.

Damn!

I don't get it.

I can bench press 30 kg.

Press then.

I have to bench press myself.

-Okay, bench press yourself. -Yeah.

Let's go.

Bench press yourself.

Go on!

Bench press yourself!

Let's go! Bench press yourself.

Do that bench press.

Come on! Press!

Get into the bucket!

-I can't do it! -Yes, you can!

Yes! Explain something to me.

The tower was supposed to be empty when we got here.

My men have been attacked, the detonator is missing.

You aren't trying to double-cross us, are you?

Come on. Who would I be double-crossing you with?

Yeah.

That makes sense.

That's funny. Look!

I never noticed a clock on that floor.

Funny, huh?

It's not very accurate. It's not 12:30 a.m.

29 minutes… 28 minutes… 27 minutes…

The minutes are really quick!

Almost like seconds.

Hey! It's a bomb!

There's a bomb!

Jesus, if you survive this, tell Marie-Joëlle

this was the loveliest day of my life,

until the unfortunate arrival of a bomb.

I wanna say something too.

If I want to look like Peter Mac Calloway so badly…

It's because secretly…

It seems like we all have a side of us…

I may be in love with him. I dunno.

Marie-Joëlle, if you can hear me…

I'm gonna die, so…

I love you.

Please. Don't let the bomb explode.

You're gay?

It stopped!

Yeah!

You're gay!

No.

Mac Calloway and I, we share a passion for nice bodies

and working out.

-You're gay! -No! Stop!

We… And then…

What I wanted to say was…

You're pissing me off! Enough!

I hope you have a good excuse.

I just saw one. He had curly hair. Tall, brown hair, thin, with a goatee.

The other one knocked me out. I didn't see him.

Those are the window washers. Nothing to worry about.

Mrs. Lanceval is here.

Part of your wife is in the elevator.

I really like her hands.

I don't wanna hear him anymore.

Put that sticky thing over his mouth… Some tape.

Right away.

I've got it.

This hostage situation is annoying.

No. Everything's fine. Calm down. It's fine.

But…

Marie-Joëlle, dinner is confirmed

cause the bomb is cancelled.

Could you bring along a muscly guy friend for my skinny friend?

They detonated the bomb.

-Why'd you slam on the brakes? -Look up there!

We've got nothing to worry about?

Aside from knocking out our guys, blowing things up and notifying the cops.

-We just have to go faster. -That's right!

There's more of less to worry about!

Chan!

Chan? Can you hear me?

I'm on the 49th floor. The elevator is blocked.

There's two window washers in the tower who we've got nothing to worry about.

They stole our detonators and blew up the 50th floor.

-The cops will be here soon. -Okay. I'll be right there.

It's coming from there.

You should always be careful with bombs.

Like we say back home, To dance " la bomba."

Remember?

I need a magic mouth

What?

Don't panic.

It's like pizza dough.

-There's a fire up there. -Call for help.

It's burning!

I really fucked you!

What? No, I'm not gay. I'm fine.

But sometimes,

it seems like it.

Hang on! I want a souvenir too.

It's beautiful.

It's odd that Chan isn't here. We have a real problem.

What we're gonna do is… What are we gonna do?

What's up with that guy?

Without the hand, how can we do it?

We'll get the hand, and we'll open the safe.

Really?

How exactly?

Chris go with what's-his-name. Check the two floors below.

I'll check the two above with the guy with the weird hair.

Let me.

I was thinking… The floor above…

Since I'm bigger. Chris, shall we head down?

-Where's the hand. -I don't know.

-Where's the damn hand? -I don't know.

-You don't know? -No.

Stéphanie?

They killed Chan.

The police and firefighters are here.

Let's move on to Plan B.

It's well-made. It almost looks real.

Chinese people have strange lucky charms.

We need to save Marie-Joëlle.

Come.

We're not saving anyone. I thought about it. I have a plan.

With this, we won't get shot. It's a lucky charm.

I have a specific plan. We're just gonna call the police.

Exactly. We're gonna call the police.

-What? -It looks like…

-What are you looking at? -It's fine.

What?

Those are pretty short.

What? It's summer. It's normal.

They're the shorts that Gerulaitis wore.

Forty-five francs. Sorry for only having a window washer's salary.

One, hostages. Two, explosions.

Three, a Chinese guy in the tower. And you…

-You wanna call the police? -Yeah.

-Think a little. -You need to think a little!

I have a better plan. A more precise one.

-First, give me the gun. -No.

No. You have the hand. Look!

Oh, the hand! Isn't it lovely?

Look. One finger, two fingers, three fingers, four…

Five, six, seven, eight! There's a bunch of fingers.

Unit three. Code seven at Montparnasse Tower.

Send reinforcements.

-Hello? -Hello? Yes.

Yes. Hello? We're at Montparnasse Tower.

There's a Chinese guy, a French guy, a black guy, a Belgian guy…

in Montparnasse Tower.

I know that joke. Chinese guy falls,

and makes a weird sound. Very funny…

Cut it out! Hello? I'm calling from the tower.

-Hello-- -State your identity.

I'm head of tower security.

I'll pass you over to the supervisor.

Thanks.

Hello?

You're the head of security? Are you in a safe place?

Yes, I'm the head of security. I'm in a safe place.

-Tell me who you are. -Are you alone?

No, I'm with a friend…

A friend who's an engineer. No. A philosopher.

-A philosopher. -He's…

a philosopher.

"Philosopher"?

His name's Michel.

His name's Michel. We're in--

-He likes chess. -He likes chess too.

-That's important. -He likes--

He likes soccer too.

Indoor soccer. But not just anywhere indoors.

Let's switch to 42. There are kids on the frequency.

No!

Try again. Hello?

What?

Seems like the battery is dead.

It's your fault. You used it up. I saw you…

You pressed it too much.

-You pressed it too much. -So it's my fault?

We're gonna die because of your stupidity. You're gonna die.

Me too. Your fiancée's gonna die.

I'm not giving you the gun

because you'd do something stupid.

You don't wanna lend it to me?

Fine, I don't care. Cause I'm gonna find

another solution and I won't need you.

Yep! Sorry.

Of course! In fact,

tell your nanny

when hostages are attacked,

you don't call the police, you call the FBI.

Hey! Come back here!

Hey! Don't leave me here alone.

I'm speaking to the window washers.

-Can you hear me? -Hello?

I'm the girl you gave cubes of cheese to.

I've managed to escape.

-Where are you? -His girlfriend!

Hey! It's your…

Don't go anywhere!

Don't go anywhere.

Please. Hang on a sec.

LOCKER ROOM

Where are you? Please!

Your girlfriend's on the phone.

Where are you?

We're in the locker room. On the 54th floor.

Stéphanie?

The cops are here.

Time for Plan C. You take care of the cops.

I've located the two simpletons. They're on the 54th floor.

I'll have the hand in a few minutes

and I'll come down to the safe.

-Are you still there? -Yes.

Yes, I'm still here. But my friend isn't happy.

He left to make a weapon just for you.

Marie-Joëlle!

I'm as happy as the first trumpeter who walked on the moon.

-I'm thrilled. -Oh my God!

You're bleeding! Are you gonna die? Are you dead?

No, I'm alive.

Thank God!

Your necklace is beautiful.

This?

It's not a necklace. It's a Chinese lucky charm.

Really? I'd love to have one.

You just have to go to China. But that would make it expensive.

Or if I knew someone,

a bald guy,

who, for example, loved me so much that

he'd say to himself, "I'll give her this Chinese lucky charm."

A Chinese friend? They eat dogs.

They wrap them up in lettuce and dip them in sauce.

No. I…

I think this is going too quickly.

I'd rather wait a little.

My head is a mess right now.

Let's talk about China instead.

Precinct 14, how can I help you?

I represent the group who's responsible

for the Montparnasse Tower explosion.

Could you stop smoking?

I'll transfer you to the chief.

Please do.

It leaves marks on your teeth.

I'm saying it to help you.

Joël, you've changed.

Being a police officer is going to your head.

Commissioner.

-Yes? -We are holding

the Lanceval family hostage. To get them out alive,

we demand the release

of the separatists Michel Dorsini,

Pierre Etchebarria and Gwenaël Dormenech.

Call the men.

That should give us a week.

Your Chinese friend would tell his dog to come sit on his plate.

The dog would go, "Woof, woof."

And then he'd eat him like that.

One poodle per meal. Chinese hospitality!

Pricey.

Yep.

You don't care. You're not paying.

Where do you wanna eat tonight?

Well, I…

-I'll let you know tomorrow. -Okay.

Oh! You found him easily?

This worked out well. Marie-Joëlle, this is François.

-I'm Peter Mac Calloway. -Oh! How lucky!

Nice to meet you. But my name's not Marie-Joëlle. It's Stéphanie.

His name isn't François, it's Francis.

Francis… Francis Huster.

How's it going? So…

Too many kisses. No need to go overboard.

I'm going to dinner with her. Don't worry, he's gay.

What?

Show her the photo you showed me. You told me…

No… Stop!

I can explain.

I'm doing a weightlifting program.

It cost 3,200 francs. I'm not messing around.

Which means that six months from now,

I'll be able to lift up a car with my bare hands.

"With your bare hands"? Are your hands naked? Can you see their asses?

Your hands are gay like you.

Your hands are gay like me.

He admitted it! You said, "Gay like me!"

It was a mistake.

Listen up. What you're saying

is very interesting,

but may I remind you that there are hostages.

We're in danger. We'd best be going down.

How? The elevators are blocked, Mrs. I-Don't-Like-Gays.

Down the stairs, Mr. Praying-Mantis-Arms.

Oh hey!

It's really lucky that

that I don't have a comeback, but…

Stop and break it down.

Do you want me to give Marie-Joëlle a gun?

So you can both have a gun? Do you wanna kill each other?

Sorry, Marie-Joëlle. We aren't kids.

"We aren't kids."

Hey!

I can't go that way.

There's explosives and hostages escaping

and they're annoying.

I have another plan.

I'm getting out of here.

Hang on.

Marie-Jo, please! Don't take him seriously.

When he said, "the annoying hostages," he wasn't talking about you.

Yes, I was.

Of course. Come with me through the air duct.

I saw this in a movie. I saw this in The Dance.

The Dance… The Death… Die Hard.

Let's go down the stairs. One step at a time.

Come on! It's an air duct. It'll be quick.

No. It'll make you dizzy. Come with me.

There aren't any steps in here. It's better.

Francis Huster is talking nonsense.

Come on, Peter.

Come with me.

Bring them back to me right away.

We lost a guy. Your brother. They did it.

They killed him.

What's-his-name?

Yes?

The bald guy and the one with the skinny arms

are in the air ducts. Check the screens

and see where they could come out.

Marie-Joëlle was attacked because of you.

You son of a bitch.

You son of a bitch… No!

You're a nudist. You're some sort of nudist.

I'm going back to save her.

No, you're not. It's really dangerous. Stay here.

Stay… There we go.

Hang on. There we go. Like this.

I can't get past.

-Go that way? Is that good? -My head is blocked.

-Try another corner. -Sorry.

Hang on. Sorry. Go that way. Gently.

You can't go that way, you see?

Good! Blocked that way.

-Hang on. Sorry -That's fine.

-Sorry. -That's fine.

-Hang on. You okay there? -Fine.

Hang on.

-Marie-Joëlle is there. -Where?

There. She's being attacked by a Chinese guy.

Go to the left.

-Go the left. Slowly. -I didn't see.

Move over. Is that better?

-It's blocked. -Go to the right.

-You good? -No.

-That's strange. -There's a blue thing.

-I found a way through! -Where?

You're getting there. Go. Marie-Joëlle!

-Can you see her? -No. But keep going.

You're almost there. Another meter to go.

Great! Speed up. They're here. They're behind us.

No!

Look over there.

You almost got through.

Stop! You're exhausting.

Want me to light a fire?

You won. I'll do it. Go on.

Go on!

Go on! Pass through.

Go ahead. Pass through.

Oh damn! Shit!

I didn't do it on purpose.

It's no big deal.

It's no big deal. No!

Mama! Why?

What's-his-name?

Hang on a second.

-Can you see anything? -Nothing yet.

But I think they must still be in the tower.

Perceptive, what's-his-name.

You remind me of Shaggy in Scooby Doo.

She needs to stop calling me what's-his-name.

Dammit! Shit!

Calm down. We're leaving with 50 million tonight.

I'll show her who the boss is.

He really got you!

I can give that bitch what she deserves.

What did you say?

Hold up your fingers like this.

Call me if you see baldy and the guy with the skinny arms on camera.

Excuse me.

Why "skinny arms"?

You'll never get me!

-What a chase! -Where's the hand?

What are you talking about?

I've got the hand to open the safe.

Oh my God! I don't wanna see that.

Team Squirrel. Get into place. Ready for takeoff at 12:50 a.m.

You there! Listen up.

That's enough. You have to stop calling me--

-We have the hand. -What?

Make love to me.

-Here? -So you do understand what I'm saying.

Let's go back to what I first said. "We have the hand."

Let's calm down and continue as planned. Does that work for you?

Very well.

When you caught me by surprise, you weren't as heavy.

Did you hear?

He wanted that hand to open a safe

with 50 million in it!

Fifty million!

Do you realize what that means?

I'm gonna leave you here.

I'm gonna talk to them.

Don't leave me alone. I'm gonna suffocate.

-That better? -Thanks.

Thanks!

I did that to get a reaction, just so you know.

That's the first thing I learned in my weightlifting class.

It's called "priapism."

Priapism.

"React after." Ap-ism.

Sorry!

Think a bit.

Fifty million.

If I manage to get 3 or 4000 francs…

-You're greedy. -No!

Stop that! I'm not just gay.

I like women too.

No… Greedy.

Greedy.

I though you said "you're gay."

I'm not just going for the money. Don't look at me like that.

-I'm going for… -I know.

I know.

To free Marie-Joëlle.

To free Marie-Joëlle! Not to Free Willy.

Let's go.

What the hell is Chris doing? It's been a while. What's going on?

-Go see what's going on. -You're right.

Delegating has worked so well for you.

You're out of luck.

I have an ability to tell when I'm being made fun of.

And that's what you were doing.

Am I right?

Maybe.

Boss?

They got Chris.

You wouldn't happen to be looking for something with nails

to open a safe full of bills?

Look at that.

Isn't that the guy

who called me skinny?

Yep! It's him. Same head, same snotty nose.

You're okay!

You're free. We have a five-fingered hostage.

Hey! Don't move.

Stay still.

If not, I'll shoot the hand in the head.

My friend's gonna slide the hand under the door

and you're gonna slide Marie-Joëlle to us.

-Five thousand francs too. -Greedy!

A thousand francs.

Okay?

No funny business.

Have a good evening.

No!

You have one minute.

Is that an act or are they really stupid?

They are really stupid.

Well…

There's actually a problem with the door.

Yep. So, we're gonna place the hand here.

And you're gonna place Marie-Joëlle here. No, there.

-No, there. -No.

It's dirty there.

Thanks. You're very kind.

You're welcome.

Your turn, what's-his-name.

That really wasn't my fault.

No luck. She'd barely said, "thanks" and then bam!

-Kidnapped again! -They aren't playing by the rules.

We aren't gonna play by the rules either.

I've never lost a battle.

I'm a window washer, just like my father.

I can bench press 30 kg.

Today, with God as my witness,

I'm gonna get them one by one and smash their faces in.

I didn't get what you just said.

Are you gonna help me rescue Marie-Joëlle or

are you gonna smash my face in one by one.

You're scaring me.

EMERGENCY ASSISTANCE

Your three men are free.

They're here. What should we do with them?

Yes. Okay…

Take them to visit the Eiffel Tower. The elevator isn't working here.

Something's not right.

We're going in!

Team Squirrel, you can get moving.

What's that?

An iris recognition system.

-You think that's funny? -Stop. We need his eye.

Get me some ice!

Why did you bounce off the window?

Think.

Think a little.

Because you were too light. That's why.

But now with all the armour on…

But this time, measure the length better.

On your marks…

Oh my!

Watch out!

I've got a gun. Watch out.

That's right. You're not the only one who has one.

You've got a gun.

I don't have one. I don't care.

If you shoot me, I'll die.

Hey! Very original.

You're right.

My brother wouldn't want me

to avenge his death without making you suffer.

Is this gonna be okay? Or should we stick your balls in a machine?

When done well, some martial arts

can cause intense pain in the human body.

That's funny. Pure Strength classes are hard,

but they aren't as focused on pain. We do more stretching and aerobics.

Trampoline…

Oh damn!

Really?

Okay.

Let me warn you.

I'm not holding back anymore!

You won't get me that easy, San Ku Kaï.

Here's what I'll do.

A kick right in the face.

Here's what I'll do.

Where is he? Stop it!

You're lucky. Instead of dying in an explosion,

you get to take a helicopter ride. And then you're gonna die.

Do you know how much a helicopter ride costs?

Ming! We have the money. Let's move.

Let me warn you. I'm not looking!

Look out!

You're quick. Good. But are you strong?

Oh! Everyone calm down.

This is a 357 magnum Police Python.

With this, I can do some serious damage.

I can blast you to Beijing.

I told you I was gonna get them one by one.

That's what I'm gonna do.

You're gonna pay for my brother's death.

No. Calm down!

We didn't kill your brother.

We just knocked him out with a burning bar.

It was really hot. Hot!

I put my hand on his face and he said,

"My God, it burns! Like UV rays."

What?

We were kind to him. We'd never hurt a panda.

I love China. I adore China. I love everything

Chinese: noodles, soy, sweet and sour sauce.

It's delicious. Donuts are delicious.

If you hurt my friend… I'm a thug.

A thug. I'll kick your ass. A thug from Shanghai.

I don't speak your language. Get out of the water.

I'm gonna give you a spectacular death.

NATIONAL POLICE - DO NOT CROSS

Did you hear what I just said?

What?

Know what the Chinese guy says?

The Chinese guy says, "Get on the ledge."

The Chinese guy says, "Turn around."

Jump!

No. You didn't say, "The Chinese guy says."

You said, "The Chinese guy says, 'Get on the ledge.'"

Then you said, "The Chinese guy says…"

"Turn around. Turn around."

-The third one was… -Four.

-Four. No, two. -Jump!

Jump.

Jump…

Do you wanna play like that?

Really? Okay. Why not?

No!

Shit! They're throwing the hostages.

Maybe he wanted to show us how it's done.

No!

It's a trap.

In China, that one's a classic.

-The Chinese trap! -Yes.

We did it.

We make a good team.

-Or couple. -Don't get carried away, what's-his-name.

I have a name. It's Michel Vignot.

You're Stéphanie. I'm Michel. Michel and Stéphanie.

One plus one makes two.

What are we gonna do with all this money?

Oops!

-Take them up to the chopper. -Would you rather

-I kill them here? -Oh, yes.

So we can chill out in the helicopter

and the police can shoot at us.

You know what? No, nothing.

Let's take the old guy and the young old guy.

We have to get there before them. If not, they'll take her.

If they have it, they already spent it all.

He wouldn't even be able to hit the broad side of a farm.

A barn!

-Don't be absurd. -A bird?

What?

Shit!

If there was another helicopter, we could have followed them.

I know what we can do.

We can attach this container to the helicopter,

so we can fly behind them discreetly.

No. This thing will never be fast enough.

It was a good idea, though.

No!

I know. We can lure them into a trap.

With a 500 franc bill attached to an invisible thread.

Invisible thread is like an invisible man, but it's thread.

Oh, my poor boy!

You're disappointing me.

They just stole 50 million. You think 500 francs is gonna interest them?

One thousand five hundred francs.

These guys don't joke around.

-Not just a pretty fade. -Face.

-Fade? -Face.

-Clever. -Very.

-Not just a… No! -To hell with him!

To hell with him!

Oh, my friend. My friend, the pilot.

Oh, my friend.

I wanna show you something.

-Something interesting! -Come quick.

Come quick and keep your eyes up.

If you look at the ground, it doesn't count.

Quick! You're gonna miss it.

Let's go!

A souvenir from the heist.

Hold them off for another minute.

Quick! Let's go.

If the bags bother you, pass them to me.

I have space. I don't use my legs to drive.

There we go. You'll be more comfortable.

Red button initialization.

Three!

-Three red buttons. -Say "yes."

-Yes. -Yes.

-Help me. Speed? -Zero. Nothing.

Mileage?

-Unlimited. -Great.

Level of fear?

Zero as well. So two times zero.

-So one, two, three, zero. -France-Brazil. Well played.

Vehicle registration.

-Everything in order? -Are you the police?

Let's go! Shit!

Yes. Just a sec! We need to sort out…

Do you have a problem or what?

Maybe that was a bit much.

What's going on?

Oh damn it!

Oh shit!

Hey! Wait!

Okay.

It's okay. Don't worry.

I'll get it under control.

It's fine.

Oh shit!

Sorry!

Give me a hand.

Give me a hand!

Helicopters aren't supposed to turn around.

I know what I'm doing.

This is a kind of spin.

This is typical.

But it kinda makes you want to…

You don't feel well in helicopters either.

Don't worry. Here's what I do:

try to concentrate on something else.

There we go!

-We're saved! -Hey!

Final stop!

Everybody out.

If we cancel our date, it's no big deal. We've got lots of money.

At least a million. I could take you to the United States.

If not, we could go to New York instead.

Stop it! You really don't get it.

Shut up!

That's mine. Don't stop running.

I put a trap in your shoes.

-What? -No!

If you go below 30km/h, you'll explode.

Marie-Joëlle!

Out of the way! It's gonna blow!

We need to go somewhere where no one's around

so we can't be slowed down.

Marie-Joëlle!

No way, ma'am.

I don't know how it works in your country.

But here in France,

1,500 franc bills don't exist.

One thousand five hundred francs. No way!

Subtitle translation by: Miria Olson