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South Park - Season 11 Episode 1
"With apologies to Jesse Jackson"
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And now back to Wheel of Fortune!
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All right, Randy.
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Congratulations on making
it all the way to the bonus round!
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Thanks, Pat!
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You've got some family
here watching tonight.
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Yeah, they're all rooting for me.
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And I'm sure you have lots
of friends watching back home?
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Yeah. Hi, everybody
watching in South Park!
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- That's us!
- Hehey!
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- Hey Randy!
- Good luck!
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Well let's see if you
can't make everyone proud.
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The category is
"People Who Annoy You".
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Okay.
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As always, we give you the letters
R, T, S, L, and E.
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We just need three more consonants,
and a vowel.
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Okay I'd like a B,
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an N,
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and a G.
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- And a vowel?
- An O please.
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Okay, well, looks like you're
gonna get a lot of help here.
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The category is
"People Who Annoy You".
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Audience, keep quiet, please.
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Uh...
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Well, uh...
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Ten seconds, Mr. Marsh.
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I know it but I don't
think I should say it.
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Five seconds, Mr. Marsh.
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Oh all right uh,
I'd like to solve the puzzle!
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Niggers!
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Huh?
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Ohhh...
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Oooo.
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Oh naggers. Of course, naggers. Right.
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Uhh, can we cut to a...
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Can we cut to a-
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Well? Gave it my best shot.
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Least we had a fun trip, huh, gang?
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I can't believe you said
the N word on national television.
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What? Well what was
I supposed to do, Sharon?
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I thought I was gonna make $30,000!
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Stanley, the only reason
Daddy used that word
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is that he thought he would win money.
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Dude, did your dad know that
the show was being broadcast live?
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Dude, that was the funniest
thing I've ever seen.
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I watched it on YouTube
about sixty times.
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Can we just drop this please?
I don't wanna talk about it!
50
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Yeah well,
it's not us you have to worry about.
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It's Token.
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He is gonna want to
kick your cracker teeth in.
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- No he's not. Is he?
- I don't know.
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I just need to explain things.
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Hey Token.
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Look, I don't know if you
saw Wheel of Fortune last night, but-
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Yeah, I was watching
with my whole family.
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And then we saw all the
replays this morning in the news.
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Listen, Token, my dad isn't a racist.
He's just stupid, all right?
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He just blurted out the N word,
and it's no big deal, okay?
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Uh, well, actually it
is kindofa big deal, Stan.
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Ohhhhhhhh?
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It may be a mistake,
but you don't understand how it feels
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when that word comes up.
So don't say it isn't a big deal.
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Oh shit here we go! It's on!
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Race war!!
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Race war!! Race war!!
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Race war is on, everybody!
It's going down! Shit is going down!
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Token, my dad wasn't trying
to be offensive. Just forget about it.
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- That's easy for you to say, Stan.
- Yeah, come on! Here we go!
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Yeah, but he didn't say
it in anger or anything like that.
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- That doesn't mean I can just be fine.
- Race war! Come on! Race war!
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If you really think it's not a big deal,
then you really are ignorant.
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That's all. I'm not "fighting" anybody.
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Token forfeits! Whites win! Whites win!
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Race war is over, everybody!
Whites won again!
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I want to apologize deeply and sincerely
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for using the N word
on Wheel of Fortune.
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And I want to assure you that
I am not a racist, Reverend Jackson.
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The puzzle you were solving
was "people who annoy you."
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Wuhell like anybody else thought
it was "naggers." I mean, right?
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Mr. Marsh, you need to take time
to understand African-American culture,
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visit black museums,
see black performers and artists.
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Oh! Ah I will!
I'm really down with African-Americans.
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Do you really want to apologize?
Are you sure?
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Y-Yes, absolutely.
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Very well.
If you want to apologize, I will accept.
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Hahh, thank you, Mr. Jackson, thank you.
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00:05:04,087 --> 00:05:06,753
Brian, get a picture of Mr.
Marsh apologizing.
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Ready to go, sir.
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Kiss it.
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- Huh?
- Apologize. Kiss it.
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- You want me to kiss your-
- That's right. Apologize.
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Agh, oh, okay.
I'll ahh... Lessee here uh...
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Apologize.
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Hey Token. I just wanted to let
you know that everything is cool now.
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My dad apologized to Jesse Jackson.
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Oh I see, so I'm supposed
to feel all better now.
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- Well, yeah.
- You just don't get it, Stan!
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Dude, Jesse Jackson said it's okay!
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Jesse Jackson,
is not the emperor, of black people!
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He told my dad he was...
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Today we are going to
have a guest speaker talk to us
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about sensitivity
and the power of words.
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In a moment you will meet
Dr. David Nelson,
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who has first-hand experience
in overcoming slander,
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David is himself a little person.
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Who knows what a little person is?
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Yes? Over here?
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A midget?
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Not exactly. That term
is actually considered offensive,
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and that's why Dr. Nelson
goes from school to school
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getting us all to think
about what we say.
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He has two Ph.D.'s and has published
six books! Please welcome David Nelson!
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Good morning, students!
How are we all feeling today?
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I would like to share with you all my-
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No! Dude! No fucking way!
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Dude!
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That, that words are like bullets.
And if you give-
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Stop! Stop! Stop!
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- Eric, be quiet!
- No, no, it's okay.
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He'll run out of steam here pretty soon.
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Look! Look look, look.
They put a little suit on him.
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So I said to my wife, "You
told me to kill the damned cockroach!
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Don't yell at me for making a mess!"
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We've got a great crowd here tonight.
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Now, how many people
are actually from Colorado?
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Ya got nothin' better to do on a Friday
night than to go to a comedy club, huh?
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00:08:05,126 --> 00:08:07,572
Hey, don't I know you from somewhere?
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Yeah. I know you. You're the guy
that said "nigger" on Wheel of Fortune.
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Look! Everybody! It's the "nigger" guy.
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Hey, it is him.
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Oh, we got a star in the club.
Everyone wave to the "nigger" guy.
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- Say, "Hi, 'nigger' guy!"
- Hi, "nigger" guy!
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That's all right, "nigger" guy.
You know we're just playin'.
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Yeah... No problem...
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Have you all seen these navigation
systems in these cars these days?
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Damn things look like they're
straight out of "Far Out Space Nuts."
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Maybe "nigger" guy has one.
You got one, "nigger" guy?
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Hey look, Betty. It's that "nigger" guy.
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Nigger guy. Nigger guy.
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Hey. What do you think you're doing?
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I just... need some aspirin.
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You aren't welcome in this store,
"nigger" guy.
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Fine!
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Principal Victoria,
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I'm very concerned about the
behavior of one of your students.
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00:09:41,028 --> 00:09:45,788
Yes, we apologize for Eric Cartman's
behavior, Mr. Nelson. We feel terrible.
151
00:09:45,971 --> 00:09:49,474
Why? I don't feel terrible.
It doesn't bother me at all.
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Words are like bullets,
and I let 'em pass right through me.
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I just know that with some one-on-one
time together with this Eric Cartman,
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I have a chance to
change the way he thinks.
155
00:10:00,059 --> 00:10:04,852
Uh, it might be best if
you just ...let it go, m'kay?
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00:10:04,952 --> 00:10:08,296
You don't understand.
You see, words are like bullets.
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00:10:08,346 --> 00:10:12,299
- And if you take away the gunpowder-
- Yeah yeah, we we get it, Mr. Nelson.
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00:10:12,349 --> 00:10:16,827
Very well, Mr. Nelson. Stacey,
go ahead and send in Eric Cartman.
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00:10:25,514 --> 00:10:30,051
Eric, Mr. Nelson is concerned
about how you respond to little people.
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00:10:30,674 --> 00:10:33,769
Oh. Did I hurt his little feelings?
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00:10:35,018 --> 00:10:38,088
You know, you think you have
the power to make me insecure,
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00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:40,138
but your words are actually
completely powerless.
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00:10:40,188 --> 00:10:41,784
If we could get, like, eight of these,
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00:10:41,834 --> 00:10:44,139
we could dress them all
up like little beavers, right,
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00:10:44,189 --> 00:10:48,139
and then put 'em in a pond,
and see if they build a dam!
166
00:10:50,300 --> 00:10:53,995
You see? No matter what you say,
I'm still standing.
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00:10:54,095 --> 00:10:55,194
Barely!
168
00:10:56,941 --> 00:11:00,041
No matter how you act,
I can rise above it!
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00:11:00,169 --> 00:11:01,592
"Rise above it!"
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00:11:02,271 --> 00:11:04,862
Get it? Like he can rise above anything!
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00:11:04,912 --> 00:11:06,617
Shut your fucking mouth!
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00:11:06,667 --> 00:11:08,299
Mr. Nelson!
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00:11:11,812 --> 00:11:15,562
He, he, he didn't get to me.
I was I was just I wast just joking
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00:11:16,555 --> 00:11:20,855
Look, look how his face gets all red!
He's like a little strawberry!
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00:11:24,746 --> 00:11:26,762
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00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:33,846
Words with venom, words that bind.
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00:11:33,896 --> 00:11:36,792
Words used like weapons
to cloud my mind.
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00:11:36,842 --> 00:11:41,192
I'm a person.
I'm a man. But no matter how hard I try,
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00:11:41,402 --> 00:11:45,164
People just say "Hey!
There goes that 'nigger' guy."
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00:11:46,828 --> 00:11:50,423
Everywhere I go, it's always the same. I
can't get away from that terrible name!
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00:11:50,473 --> 00:11:52,451
"Hey Nigger Guy!
Nigger Guy! Nigger Guy!"
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Stop!
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00:11:55,416 --> 00:11:58,629
Now go. Call me Nigger Guy!
Fill me with your hate!
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00:11:58,679 --> 00:12:00,892
Try to bring me down- Oop up,
you're too late.
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00:12:00,942 --> 00:12:04,604
Someone just beat you to it.
But my dream will not die:
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00:12:04,893 --> 00:12:06,934
To be thought of as more...
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00:12:07,463 --> 00:12:10,057
than just "Nigger Guy."
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Respect.
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00:12:17,425 --> 00:12:19,056
Token! Hey, wait up.
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00:12:19,599 --> 00:12:21,710
I just wanted to say, I get it now.
191
00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:24,804
You know, after that "little person"
talk at that assembly the other day,
192
00:12:24,854 --> 00:12:28,754
I understand how you feel
about somebody saying the N word.
193
00:12:29,033 --> 00:12:31,546
Sooo black people are midgets.
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00:12:33,027 --> 00:12:34,225
God damnit!
195
00:12:34,342 --> 00:12:36,496
Excuse me: over here, please?
196
00:12:36,546 --> 00:12:39,700
I need all students
to join me over here.
197
00:12:39,750 --> 00:12:41,855
I have called you
here because it is time
198
00:12:41,905 --> 00:12:45,542
that we taught Eric Cartman
a lesson once and for all!
199
00:12:46,034 --> 00:12:49,820
In a few seconds, Eric will be sent in,
and when we walks through that door,
200
00:12:49,870 --> 00:12:54,489
I want you all at the same time to yell,
"Hello, fatso!"
201
00:12:56,092 --> 00:12:58,347
...I don't think that's
a very good idea, sir.
202
00:12:58,397 --> 00:13:02,210
He has to learn his lesson!
You see, words are like bullets.
203
00:13:02,260 --> 00:13:04,524
All right all right, here he comes.
204
00:13:07,584 --> 00:13:09,765
"Good morning, fatso!"
205
00:13:10,147 --> 00:13:13,747
Hey! What the hell is that?!
You think that's fuckin' funny?!
206
00:13:13,816 --> 00:13:16,371
Kyle, did you put everybody up to this?!
I bet you did!
207
00:13:16,421 --> 00:13:20,571
- What the hell is going on?!
- Now you know how it feels.
208
00:13:26,429 --> 00:13:29,749
Ya- you you didn't like it
when the tables were turned, did ya?
209
00:13:29,799 --> 00:13:33,151
Alright, who is the freaking genius
who dressed him up in little suspenders?
210
00:13:33,201 --> 00:13:34,701
Clyde, was that you?
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00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:38,078
You can't get to me!
Words are like bullets!
212
00:13:38,128 --> 00:13:41,275
And so it is my honor, to announce today
213
00:13:41,335 --> 00:13:44,885
the Randy Marsh African-American
Scholarship Foundation.
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00:13:46,853 --> 00:13:49,995
It is my hope that
this foundation will prove
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00:13:50,095 --> 00:13:53,706
my commitment to the education
of African-American students
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00:13:53,821 --> 00:13:59,922
and erase once and for all
my identity as the "nigger" guy.
217
00:14:02,127 --> 00:14:04,864
You really...
you really don't know how hard it is
218
00:14:04,914 --> 00:14:09,151
to be constantly reminded of something
lame that happened in your past.
219
00:14:09,996 --> 00:14:11,721
I mean I... just wanna move on
220
00:14:11,771 --> 00:14:14,443
from what happened on "Wheel
of Fortune," you know and...
221
00:14:14,493 --> 00:14:17,343
and when people call me...
"nigger guy"...
222
00:14:17,489 --> 00:14:19,774
they're bringing up a
painful chapter of my history
223
00:14:19,824 --> 00:14:22,724
and all the negativity
that went along with it.
224
00:14:22,895 --> 00:14:26,490
You just...
you can't imagine how that feels.
225
00:14:28,986 --> 00:14:30,967
Is this "nigger" guy serious?
226
00:14:31,017 --> 00:14:34,917
Anyway, here's to a new
start for us all. Thank you!
227
00:14:41,336 --> 00:14:44,681
Hey look Skeeter!
That's that guy from the TV!
228
00:14:44,897 --> 00:14:49,108
Well well well, looks like
we got ourselves a nigger guy!
229
00:15:03,964 --> 00:15:06,094
Where you goin' "nigger" guy?
230
00:15:06,477 --> 00:15:08,602
Please I, I don't want any trouble.
231
00:15:08,652 --> 00:15:12,102
Well you got trouble,
when you first decided to slander
232
00:15:12,296 --> 00:15:14,996
an entire race of people
on "Wheel of Fortune"!
233
00:15:15,046 --> 00:15:18,690
Yeah. You like making fun of minorities,
"nigger" guy?
234
00:15:18,790 --> 00:15:21,840
Huh we don't take kindly
to social ignorants.
235
00:15:21,890 --> 00:15:24,190
You tell 'im, Skeeter, you tell 'im!
236
00:15:24,293 --> 00:15:25,677
What do you want??
237
00:15:25,727 --> 00:15:27,217
What do we want?
238
00:15:28,947 --> 00:15:32,216
We want to live in a
world without people like you
239
00:15:32,266 --> 00:15:35,266
who are intolerant of African-Americans!
240
00:15:35,829 --> 00:15:37,476
Leave him alone.
241
00:15:39,123 --> 00:15:42,341
- Hey... That's that other "nigger" guy.
- Huh?
242
00:15:42,645 --> 00:15:46,296
That's the guy from Seinfeld,
used the N word a whole bunch o' times.
243
00:15:46,496 --> 00:15:50,091
Michael Richards? Hwell, son of a bitch!
244
00:15:50,241 --> 00:15:55,235
Looks like it's our lucky day!
We done got us two "nigger" guys!
245
00:15:55,834 --> 00:15:57,515
Make that three.
246
00:15:57,915 --> 00:15:59,579
- Mark Fuhrman?
- Who?
247
00:15:59,629 --> 00:16:02,575
He done said the
N word in the O.J. case.
248
00:16:02,625 --> 00:16:05,475
What is this? A "nigger" guy convention?
249
00:16:06,853 --> 00:16:10,448
We aren't being pushed
around anymore. Leave.
250
00:16:11,396 --> 00:16:15,346
Come on, Skeeter. These "nigger"
guys ain't worth our trouble.
251
00:16:16,007 --> 00:16:19,019
Damn "nigger" guys! We'll be back!
252
00:16:23,497 --> 00:16:25,447
You'd better come with us.
253
00:16:26,193 --> 00:16:28,589
Come on in, Mr.
Marsh. We'll make you some coffee.
254
00:16:28,639 --> 00:16:29,979
What's going on here?
255
00:16:30,029 --> 00:16:33,190
We've been following your story
since we first saw it on the news.
256
00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:36,121
Don't worry - you're with friends now.
257
00:16:36,171 --> 00:16:38,951
Dale here used the N
word in a racial joke at work.
258
00:16:39,001 --> 00:16:40,683
Scott used the plural N word
259
00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:43,364
to refer to a group of
gardeners who broke his fence.
260
00:16:43,414 --> 00:16:46,160
They were Mexicans. I was being ironic.
261
00:16:46,709 --> 00:16:48,707
We're all just like you.
262
00:16:48,807 --> 00:16:52,535
No. Nono, I'm sorry, but I'm not...
like you.
263
00:16:52,776 --> 00:16:55,589
I just said the N word
by mistake to win money.
264
00:16:55,639 --> 00:16:59,351
I made a mistake too.
I was trying to be funny!
265
00:16:59,584 --> 00:17:02,413
I got frustrated and thought
I would get some shock laughs.
266
00:17:02,463 --> 00:17:06,763
I'm just... not that good of a comedian
if you want to know the real truth.
267
00:17:06,924 --> 00:17:11,274
You said the N word to a black man's
face! That's way worse than what I did!
268
00:17:11,501 --> 00:17:13,981
You really think that matters?!
269
00:17:15,046 --> 00:17:18,646
You really think all those
people out there see a difference?
270
00:17:18,807 --> 00:17:21,748
Oh, they might say your
racial slur was more accidental;
271
00:17:21,798 --> 00:17:23,848
they might even laugh about it.
272
00:17:24,075 --> 00:17:25,875
But at the end of the day,
273
00:17:25,929 --> 00:17:29,267
all you are to them is
just another damned "nigger" guy!
274
00:17:30,906 --> 00:17:33,356
Oh, you don't like that, do ya?
275
00:17:34,216 --> 00:17:35,216
No.
276
00:17:35,266 --> 00:17:37,521
Randy, we want you to join us.
277
00:17:37,571 --> 00:17:42,090
We have a plan to make this
all go away once and for all.
278
00:17:45,850 --> 00:17:48,440
Now look, Token, I've done
everything I can to make this right!
279
00:17:48,490 --> 00:17:50,095
You have no reason to still be mad!
280
00:17:50,145 --> 00:17:52,540
I have every reason to be mad!
You just don't get it!
281
00:17:52,590 --> 00:17:54,741
I'm not responsible for what my dad did!
282
00:17:54,791 --> 00:17:57,187
No, but you can't just
pretend it never happened either!
283
00:17:57,387 --> 00:17:59,383
- What the hell do you want from me?!
- Nothing!
284
00:17:59,433 --> 00:18:01,760
- Then stop being mad!
- No!
285
00:18:01,810 --> 00:18:05,787
Fellas! Fellas come quick!
Cartman's gonna fight the midget!
286
00:18:14,757 --> 00:18:16,671
All right, Eric, come on, Eric.
287
00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:18,309
Dude, are you sure you wanna do this?
288
00:18:18,359 --> 00:18:20,548
Apparently this guy
has a black belt in karate.
289
00:18:20,598 --> 00:18:21,996
It's a midget, dude.
290
00:18:22,046 --> 00:18:26,822
Students, I am going to beat the
crap out of this kid to prove a point.
291
00:18:27,555 --> 00:18:31,455
No dude. It can't talk,
that isn't fair, I'll laugh too much.
292
00:18:46,245 --> 00:18:51,688
Senators, I know it is not normally
considered "American" to ban words.
293
00:18:51,921 --> 00:18:55,140
But there is one slur
that has caused so much damage
294
00:18:55,190 --> 00:18:58,462
that we believe it should
finally be made illegal.
295
00:18:59,327 --> 00:19:03,221
I'm talking,
of course, about the term "nigger guy."
296
00:19:04,103 --> 00:19:05,418
"Nigger guy"?
297
00:19:05,568 --> 00:19:09,379
Two words which by themselves
can be harmless but which together...
298
00:19:09,429 --> 00:19:12,929
form a verbal missile of hate.
- Yeah! That's right!
299
00:19:13,044 --> 00:19:16,048
Oh sure. Some people
just use the term in jest,
300
00:19:16,098 --> 00:19:18,938
tell a nigger guy joke
or two thinking it's no big deal
301
00:19:18,988 --> 00:19:21,870
but they don't realize it
can lead to people using the term
302
00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:24,170
as an excuse for violence.
303
00:19:24,303 --> 00:19:27,865
Goddamn nigger guy's tryin'
to be all political-like now!
304
00:19:28,048 --> 00:19:31,883
Senators, I've learned to
admit that I'm capable of having
305
00:19:31,983 --> 00:19:34,246
slightly racist thoughts
once in a while.
306
00:19:34,296 --> 00:19:36,450
Can anybody say they never do?
307
00:19:36,500 --> 00:19:40,350
How long will it be before
you are all called "nigger guys"?
308
00:19:41,546 --> 00:19:44,864
Uhhh, hold on a second,
are you suggesting that "nigger guy"
309
00:19:44,914 --> 00:19:48,085
could become a slur that
refers to all white people?
310
00:19:48,135 --> 00:19:51,630
I'm certainly not a nigger guy.
I've never thought a racist thought.
311
00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:54,486
Aw, come on, you're the
biggest nigger guy in Washington.
312
00:19:54,536 --> 00:19:57,303
Mr. Marsh,
we see now the importance of your bill.
313
00:19:57,353 --> 00:19:59,685
All those in favor to
ban the term "nigger guy"?
314
00:19:59,735 --> 00:20:01,535
- Aye!
- Opposed?
315
00:20:01,787 --> 00:20:02,787
Nay?
316
00:20:03,539 --> 00:20:05,103
The motion is passed!
317
00:20:11,935 --> 00:20:13,067
We did it!
318
00:20:13,117 --> 00:20:15,068
For the first time in American history,
319
00:20:15,118 --> 00:20:17,884
a word has been officially
banned from use.
320
00:20:17,934 --> 00:20:21,469
From now on,
if a person uses the word "nigger,"
321
00:20:21,569 --> 00:20:25,481
it must be at least seven
words away from the word "guy."
322
00:20:27,928 --> 00:20:30,799
Tom, it appears that the
nigger guy epidemic is ove-
323
00:20:30,849 --> 00:20:32,949
Oh damnit I said it, didn't I?
324
00:20:37,523 --> 00:20:39,887
Okay! Okay, you win!
325
00:20:40,220 --> 00:20:42,882
- Say "Uncle!"
- Ung-cle!
326
00:20:43,352 --> 00:20:45,836
Now say "Carol Anne,
don't go into the light!"
327
00:20:45,886 --> 00:20:48,336
Carol Anne, don't go into the light!
328
00:20:50,039 --> 00:20:52,020
Oh man, that is hysterical!
329
00:20:53,501 --> 00:20:54,501
There!
330
00:20:54,766 --> 00:20:59,109
Now you all see that
I am not limited by my size.
331
00:21:01,705 --> 00:21:05,305
I have proven my point!
My work here is done!
332
00:21:07,730 --> 00:21:10,775
- What was his point?
- I have no idea.
333
00:21:11,192 --> 00:21:14,138
- Dude, I don't get it.
- I don't get it either.
334
00:21:14,188 --> 00:21:17,616
Wait a minute.
That's it! I don't get it.
335
00:21:18,432 --> 00:21:21,428
- Huh?
- Don't you see, Kyle? I don't get it!
336
00:21:21,977 --> 00:21:25,439
Token, I get it now. I don't get it.
337
00:21:25,617 --> 00:21:28,213
I've been trying to say that
I understand how you feel, but,
338
00:21:28,263 --> 00:21:29,607
I'll never understand.
339
00:21:29,657 --> 00:21:31,829
I'll never really get
how it feels for a black person
340
00:21:31,879 --> 00:21:35,084
to have somebody use the N word.
I don't get it.
341
00:21:35,361 --> 00:21:37,261
Now you get it, Stan.
342
00:21:37,475 --> 00:21:40,375
- Yeah. I totally don't get it.
- Thanks, dude.
343
00:21:41,269 --> 00:21:43,709
Subtitles: Spirit
Transcript: South Park Scriptorium
www.southparknews.net
26672
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