All language subtitles for Detectorists.S03E02.Episode.2.1080p.BluRay.REMUX.AVC.FLAC.2.0-MJOLNiR

- What's this, metal
detecting, are you?

- Oh.

Pardon?
- Metal detecting?

- That's right.
- Found anything?

- Ah, bits and bobs.

- Oh, good luck.

Maybe you'll strike gold.
- Yes.

See ya!

- Hello.

Looking for treasure?

- Something like that.
- What have you found?

- Oh, bits and pieces.

- No gold?

- Nope.

- Well, fingers crossed.
- Yeah.

See ya.

- All right?
- This is a problem.

It's a public footpath,
there's bloody ramblers

coming by asking the
same questions all the time.

- Oh, here come some more.

- Ah, metal detectors.

We had a metal detector
once, didn't we, Rosemary?

- It's still in the garage.

- Is that so?

- Have you found any gold?
- Oh, Jesus.

- Pardon?
- No, no, no gold.

No, no, no, no.

- Fingers crossed.
- Fingers crossed, yeah.

Uh, tell me, how many more
of you are coming through?

- Of us?

About 50 today, I think.

- Call it a day?

- Probably best.

♪ Will you search through
the lonely earth for me ♪

♪ Climb through the
briar and bramble ♪

♪ I'll be your treasure ♪

Mate, that was a
good couple of hours.

- Were you getting good stuff?

Me, too.

Bloody ramblers notwithstanding.

- It's all Roman,
nothing spectacular, but,

five of these little bronzes,
and that's part of something.

Not sure what.

- Same here.

Roman grots.

Four or five of them.

- How many times have
we searched this field

and only now it starts
throwing up its treasure?

Six weeks' time,
this'll be solar panels

as far as the eye can see.

- Less than six weeks.

- Doesn't exactly make
your heart sing, does it?

- Oh, well.

Sic biscuitus deteriatum.

See University
Challenge last night?

- Yeah.

- What three letter
generic name is given

to the bird family Paridae?

- Bzz!
- Balliol, Potts.

- Tit.
- Tit is correct, yes!

Classic.

Hello, there!

Speaking of tits.

- Hello, there.

- What are you doing here?
- Oh, just, uh, passing by.

- You're always just passing by.

You must come miles
out of your way to pass by.

It must seem like that, yes.

No, we haven't seen you
since your amazing find,

your golden astel.

Wanted to congratulate
you, actually.

- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.

Really fantastic.

How does it feel?

- What, to have a
piece with my name

underneath it in
the British Museum?

Uh...

Feels good.

- I imagine it does.

Well, congratulations.

Here's to you.
- Mrs. Robinson.

- Pardon?
- Nothing.

- Is that all you came to say?

- That and to, uh,

wave a white flag, so to speak.

Don't you think it's time we
put our differences behind us?

Maybe pool resources?

- What resources?

- Well, our permissions.

We've got more than enough
land to detect on and, uh,

well, this farm
here, it's far too big

for just the two of you.

- If you've got more
than enough land,

why do you wanna come here?

- Well sometimes it's good...
- Duh-duh-duh-duh.

I wasn't talking to you, Paul.

- More choice,
different topography.

- You don't have any
permissions, do you?

- We do.
- Oh, yeah?

Where?

- I'm not going
to tell you, am I?

Unless you agree to share.
- Oh!

Right.

- We have some prime locations.

- Oh, do you?

- I know what you're doing.

- What am I doing?

- You're doing a
Jimmy waffle-on.

- No, I'm not, no, I've just
got an itchy chin, that's all.

- Oh, yeah, I've got a bit
of an itchy chin as well.

Tell us about these permissions?

- And now you're both doing it.

You're both doing
a Jimmy waffle-on.

Aren't they?
- Chinny reckon?

Yeah, mm-hm.
- Mm-hm.

- No, we're not.

- No, we've both just
got itchy chins, that's all.

- Really?

Pathetic.

Come on, Paul.

- Spanners.

Kate, are you here?

Kate, can I have a word?

- Just a minute!

Hello, Dad, sorry,
I'm running late again.

- Now, Kate, we
need to have a chat.

- Dad, can we maybe
take this down, this poster?

- What, the tennis lady, why?

- Don't you think
it's a bit tacky?

- Tacky?

No.
- And a bit...

Well, degrading to women.

- Kate, she's
scratching her bottom.

- Dad, she's got no knickers on.

- Hasn't she?

- I'm late, I'll
talk to you later.

Oh, Dad?

Mm?

- I think there's a
squirrel in the flat.

See ya.

- Oh, bloody hell!

Oh, bloody, bloody hell!

It was terrible, I was
going from room to room

with a saucepan
and a mop handle,

poking under furniture,
shaking curtains.

It took me an hour and
a half to search the flat.

- And no squirrel?
- I didn't find one.

- She was winding you up.

- You think she
was winding me up?

- Sounds like a wind-up.

- Well, that's what
it's like, chaos.

And she never makes
a plan and sticks to it,

so I never know if she's in.

- So where does that
leave us if you can't come

and stay with me on my boat?
- I know.

I've been looking into
remedies for seasickness.

- So have I.

I think you should
try hypnotherapy.

- I've always tried to
steer clear of the mystical.

- It's not mystical.
- It is a bit mystical.

I mean, I'm not afraid of
boats, it's the movement.

Hypnotists can't stop
the boat from moving.

Well, maybe he
can, in your head.

Let me get you an appointment.

- Well, take a brave man
to go poking around in here.

Who knows what
might be unleashed?

- I don't understand
what we're doing here.

Tim, there's nothing down here.

- Let's give it another hour.

- Tim!

Tim, I think you better
come and see this.

- Where's this?
- Just over here.

Amazing.

You see the
flagstones protecting it?

- It's as if it was
preserved on purpose.

A layer of sand and
then these stones on top.

- Do we know how far it extends?

- Well, at least another
four foot in that direction,

but maybe even further.

- Cover it up.

- Huh?

- Get a tarp or something.

Cover it up.

Hello!

Oh, back there.

How are you?

Good to see you.

- It's all there,
Becks, it has to be.

I reckon the stones were
put down deliberately

to protect the mosaic.

I can see you.

I think the whole floor
might be complete.

Honestly, I took
off the edge stone.

The mosaic was right there.

It's so beautiful, look.

Oh, weird.

- What?

- I took at least five
photos, they're not here.

- Are you sure you saved them?
- Balls, where are they?

Oh, it doesn't matter,
I'll take some more

when we lift the stones.

- That's brilliant,
congratulations.

- Thank you, and you know what?

I saw, at last, some
enthusiasm in Tim.

Usually nothing stirs him,
but he got quite emotional.

Well, good, it sounds
like it's working out.

- Yeah.

Yeah, I think it's working out.

He can't make me do
anything against my will?

- You're always fully conscious,

just in a very relaxed state.

- So, he can't make
me say anything

that I'll regret later?

- No.
- Ah.

Nothing specific.

I'm not hiding anything.

To my knowledge.

- Just chill.

- Yeah, I'm just saying, I
don't want to blurt anything out.

Do people tend to blurt?

- There's very little blurting.

- Oh, good.

Good.

- Mr. Stater?
- Yes?

- Would you like
to come through?

- Why?

- For your treatment,
I'm Dr. Hoffman.

- Are you?

Is she?

- Yes, that's Dr. Hoffman.

- Oh, yeah, great.

Good, yeah.

Let's go.

- Don't be nervous.
- I'm not nervous.

- Try to relax!

I want this to work.
- Me, too.

- That's it, just
take a seat there

and make yourself comfortable.

- Oh.

I was expecting,
you know, hangings.

- Hangings?

- Uh, tie-dyed wall
hangings, wind chimes,

smell of patchouli.
- Oh, I see, like a mystic.

- You're not gonna have
me doing Elvis, are you?

- No, no, nothing like that.

- 'Cause that's
the thing, isn't it?

You know, someone says
the word "fish and chips"

and I am compelled to
sing and dance like Elvis.

- I suppose so.

- Could you do that?

- I'm not a stage
hypnotist, Mr Stater.

Can I call you Lance?
- Please do.

- Great, so...

The only way this can work

is if you are completely
comfortable and relaxed.

So, sit back.

Success depends on you being
able to completely switch off.

Trust my voice and
let it carry you away.

- I suppose it'd be difficult if
you had an annoying accent

or a squeaky voice.

- So try and put those sorts
of thoughts out of your mind

for a while.

Try to empty your mind.

- I will do exactly as you say.

- Well done.

Just close your eyes and
listen to the sound of my voice.

- Listening.

- You don't have to tell me
you're listening, just listen.

- Got it.

- You don't have
to say anything.

- Oh, I thought you
were waiting for a reply.

- No.
- 'Cause you hesitated.

- I might do a
lot of hesitating,

but you don't need to
say anything, or worry.

Just relax.

And listen.

So, I want you to imagine

that you are lying on soft
warm sand, on a beach.

And it is a beautiful
summer's day,

and the sun is on your face.

You've not got a care in
the world, or anything to do.

You can just enjoy
the sun all day.

- Sorry, sorry, sorry, I, um,

I'm very sensitive to the
sun, I burn very easily.

I wouldn't just sunbathe.

Is carpet the same as sand?

Could I lie in my flat?

- Yes.

So, you are lying on the carpet,

in your flat.

You are very comfortable
and warm, just right.

And you can feel yourself
sinking into the carpet,

sinking down through the carpet.

Down.

And the carpet...

- No, no, the problem is...

- You live on the first floor?
- I live on the first floor.

Exactly.

So I'm sinking down
now into Mrs. Morris's flat.

She's gonna be terrified.

- This is why it works
best on a beach,

because you can
just keep on sinking.

- Ah, have you got one
of those sunshades?

Maybe I could sit under
one of those big umbrellas.

- Yes, do that.

- Right, here we go,
back on the beach.

Carry on.

Carry on ez vous.

- You were very quick.

- I was out like a light, yeah.

Like that, sparko.

- Really?
- Yeah.

No, I feel different.

I feel like I don't suffer
from seasickness any more.

- Why did the doctor have
her head in her hands?

- Did she?

Oh, I think she had a
migraine coming on.

Can children get migraines?

- She wasn't that young.

- She didn't know
who Uri Geller was.

- Why were you
talking about Uri Geller?

- Oh, I was talking about
fraudsters in general.

Not her, I was just
saying that there must be

some out there.

But no, yeah, I think
it's done some good.

What's this?

- That's for being brave.

- Aw, cheers.

Well, better get
off to the scout hut.

- Do you wanna stay tomorrow
night to see if it worked?

- Yeah, go on, then.

- We can get a takeaway,
I'll treat you to fish and chips.

- Thank you very much.

Very nice!

House of Constantine,
circa 224 to 330 AD.

That's what I said.

- And this one is third
century, possibly Claudius Il.

- I said that as well.

- And all this out
of the same field?

- There's something good
going on down there, Terry.

We're close, I can feel it.

- What's Russell doing?

Russell?

Russ!

What you doin'?
- I'm on my new app!

- Your what?
- It's my new app on my phone!

It's a metal detecting app.

It's great.

You can go on different
historical sites to detect.

I'm currently on Hadrian's Wall.

- Well, now I've
seen everything.

- Oh, here we go!

Good signal, 12.5.

It's deep.

Ah!

Roman Centurion's helmet.

Good condition.

I'm keeping it.

- So, did Andy tell you
who's been snooping around?

- Who?

- Simon and Garfunkel.

- What, the Antiquisearchers?

- Didn't they change their
name to something ridiculous?

- The Dirt Sharks.

- Right, well,
there you go, then.

It's decided.

We are no longer
the Dirt Sharks.

- What are we?

- Terra Firma.
- Yes!

But we're spelling Terra
the proper Latin way.

Not the way you
want to spell it.

- It's scarier my way.

- Right then, new
name, new start.

This year, I am
determined will be the year

we are finally accepted
onto a proper organized rally.

And when we are, I
want us to be prepared.

I wanna see the Dirt Sharks...
- Terra Firma.

- I wanna see Terra
Firma get the best finds

in every category.

Gavin, what are you gonna find?

- James I, hammered groat.

Is it real?

- I think so, I got it on eBay.

- How deep will it be?

- Four, five inches?

- Reading?

- 53, a bit scratchy.

- Nice.

Michael?

Be realistic.

- So I said, "If that
turns out to be the case,

"I will change my
name by deed poll

"to Belinda Carlisle."

- What a wonderful story!

- True as I'm sitting here now!

- That restores your faith
in humanity, doesn't it?

- Another cup of tea, Belinda?

- There she goes.

You know.

She has got the timing
of Ken Dodd, that one.

- I'll give you
that one, Sheila!

We have a laugh, don't we, eh?

- You idiot!

How can you get it so wrong?

- I just thought.

- What?

What?

- It doesn't matter.

- Why don't you think
before you open your mouth?

- Knobhead.

- Well, we've had
a very busy week.

After a typically
infuriating encounter

with those two goons
from the DMDC,

Paul and I decided to
drop in on the landowner,

see if we couldn't...
- Butter him up.

- Curry favor, I
was going to say.

And the information
he gave us was...

- Weapons grade.

- Can you stop
interrupting, please?

Turns out the church
farm has been acquired

by a solar energy company.

They're due to start
converting the land

in just under five weeks.

- So, did he give
you permission?

- He didn't, no.

But Photon Harvest
Solar Electricity did.

Paul's idea.

Cut out the middleman,
go straight to the top.

Offer them a service
they can't live without.

- What service?

- Obstruction clearance, farm
machinery, unexploded bombs.

- That was my idea.

- I just said it was your idea.

I gave you credit,
about two seconds ago.

You don't have to repeat it.

Well, it was when I
mentioned unexploded bombs,

and what happened to
that idiot Terry Seymour

a couple of years ago, that
their ears pricked right up.

And the permission,
ladies and gentlemen,

is...
- Ours.

- Oh, God!

- Are you the metal detectors?

- Are we the metal detectors?

Bloke I spoke to on the phone?

- No.

- Oh, right, we got some.
- Some what?

- We've got some metal
detectors who can do all this.

So we don't need you.

- Sorry, wait, what?

We've got five weeks
until this farm's converted.

- Five weeks till the panels
go up, we've acquired the land,

we need someone to
get rid of the obstructions.

- What, and you've got
your own detectorists

to do it for you?

- They're freelance, they wrote
to us, we've employed them.

What are they called?

- A company called,
um, Terra Firma?

- Never heard of 'em.

- And when are they showing up?

- Well, I thought they
were gonna be here.

I was supposed to meet
them, I thought you were them.

- You are kidding me.

- Are you the metal detectors?
- Indeed we are.

Terra Firma at
your service, sir.

And I can see from
our friends' faces,

they've heard the good news.

- It's a sneaky bloody trick.

- Quite the opposite, in fact.

We've been through
all the correct channels,

as can be proved
with this paper trail.

We've been on
this farm five years.

- Can't you all do it? I don't
care if they do it as well.

- No, no, no, no, no, no.

You gave us the permission,
as stated in this email.

- We have the permission
of the landowner.

- Overruled, actually.

- Oh, come on, there's only
four of you and 300 acres!

Why can't you all work together?

- We gave them a chance to
share and they turned it down.

- Why should we?
We got here first.

- We got here first, why
should we share it with you?

You should share.
- Shut up.

- You shut up.

- Jesus, it's like a
school playground!

How old are you lot?

Look, we'll do it first
come, first served.

Whoever gets here first
gets the choice of their field.

- Not fair.

- Oh, all right!

Well, you can all sling
your hooks, I don't care!

- Hang on, hang on, wait,
I can go along with that.

First come, first served.

- Okay.

- See, we don't have
to behave like kids.

- Yeah, but after
we've chosen the field,

there is an invisible force
field all the way around

and you cannot enter it.

- What if we haven't
got our detectors?

- It's impenetrable,
impenetrable force field.

- Right.

Now shake hands.
- No way.

- Never.

- Childish.

- I know you are.

What am I?

Huh?

- Feeling any better?

- I think so.

- Did it all come up?

- I saw some fish eating it.

- Did you?

- Yeah.