Original subtitles

Excuse me. I don't mean to intrude, but aren't you Barbara Broadcast?

Yes, I am. See, I knew it all the time.

I knew it was her.

You look so much better in the picture in the copy of your report than you do.

Would you mind autographing our copy?

Sure. Would you make one to Morris Vincent and the other to Florence

please? All right.

Oh, this is Florence Dorothy, and I am Morris Vincent.

You know, it's really awful the way you were deported.

Yes, and for a victimless crime.

Were all your crimes victimless?

No. Not all, thank goodness.

Well, it must be terrible not to be able to return to your homeland.

Well, I was never that crazy about Puerto Rico.

Well, thank you.

Bye -bye.

Can I quote you on that? I would appreciate it if you did.

I don't mean to intrude, but my brother's kind of shy.

Well, he's a big, big fan of yours.

Well, would you mind giving him an autograph and a little head?

Just a little. He doesn't want to come or anything.

Why so shy?

You don't have anything to be shy about.

Did I come in your mouth?

When will I be old enough to come in a girl's mouth?

When you're old enough not to ask.

Why do you continue to hook when you're such a successful author?

Well, I'll tell you, it beats writing for a living.

Typing, you know, it breaks your nails.

Do you type?

I was a secretary.

Really? I enjoyed taking a shorthand.

Oh, I prefer longhand.

Where did you get such nice teeth?

One night, I caught the tooth fairy under my pillow, and I gave him the best

bucket of his life.

Would you like another, sir?

No, thanks. Just coffee.

Now, what else did I leave out of the book?

Do you want to go on to the strange people who work for you?

Well, there was this slightly strange one who liked to hang out in front of

terminals.

Do you mind?

I'm expecting a breath.

Not at all.

Can you do a number 17?

Certainly.

Has your friend arrived yet?

No, not yet.

He does a wonderful café au lait.

Hello.

Oh, hello.

Joyce, this is Roberta. Roberta, this is Joyce. She used to work for me.

I ordered for you.

Oh, I can't. That's my binge food.

We were just talking about the one who likes bus terminals. Do you remember

one? Vaguely.

If you want to meet people, particularly strangers to a city, there's no better

place than a bus terminal.

I would love to hear the end.

But I have to go.

It's going to be a very busy afternoon.

There was a really bloody mafia picture on TV last night.

Goodbye.

That chopped liver cock's gorgeous.

Must have been done by the sculptor Horowitz. That couldn't be Horowitz's

Horowitz only works in Palavar.

Come on.

Excuse me.

I'm a friend of Tony's.

Oh, Tony.

Yeah, he said I could make it with you sometime.

On his account, of course.

Oh, that's nice.

Are you circumcised?

Yes, why?

I don't want you to think I'm not interested in you as a person.

I believe the story is just beginning to get interesting.

The way everyone was conning everyone, I think she had the most honest

relationship. Beating off.

Excuse me.

Pardon me. Do you mind if I blow your waiter?

Not at all.

I don't know what on earth happened to mine.

In a Caucasian restaurant, you really have to keep track of your waiter.

They all look alike.

Do you want any help?

Please.

Would you like something to drink?

No alcohol in the Shirley Temple.

Shirley.

Thank you.

Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me.

Could you excuse me a few minutes? I'm expecting a very important call. Sure.

Please, have a waiter while you're waiting.

Better still, give my compliments to the chef.

Thank you.

Everyone's waiting.

What should I do?

I'll be right along.

Go get him, tiger.

Waiter, some more coffee, please.

Thank you.

um

Thank you.

um um

Thank you.

Excuse me, did the lady that I was with leave any messages for me? Miss

Broadcast, yes, your president. Thank you. You're welcome.

Are you going to offer me a tip of your joint?

What I

usually offer people is more expensive.

Oh, but never overpriced.

It's getting way past my head time.

I'm gonna take and I'm gonna pay.

And I'll show you how, how we can make it.

You won't know what if you, I need everything.

If I couldn't take it now.

Oh baby, you really do mean a lot.

I love you and the feeling is so strong.

I'm so angry when you tell me no.

Because I love you, I love you and I want you so much.

You've got an awful lot to give.

And when I get you, I really start to live.

You light my life when you tell me there.

And I love you, I love you, and I must confess.

You got what it takes, and I'm gonna take it.

And I'll show you how, just how we can make it.

You got what it takes, and I'm gonna take it.

Your kisses make me lose my cool.

And they tell me that you love me.

Why try to fight with me? Oh, and I want you back as

well. You got what it takes.

And done.

oh oh

Thank you.

Thank you.

Oh, Jesus.

Still a business doing pleasure with you.

I don't believe it.

Hi.

I was just thinking about you. I felt it.

What's your name again?

Roberta. Curly, this is Roberta.

It's very nice to meet you. Very nice to meet you. Did you get off well? I loved

it. Good.

She's real nice?

Yeah.

Much nicer than that other bitch.

What other bitch?

We had a little pap.

Pap, what's that?

Protestant American princess.

So we had this little tap working for us. And to set her straight, we let

at her. Packed out one of your fantasies.

Oh, God.

Thank you.

Bye -bye.

Um...

Where are we going to do this tomorrow?

How about in the restaurant again upstairs?

Yeah.

Table, please.

Yes, we'll have your reservation in about five minutes.

Thank you very much.