Original subtitles

- ♪ I am American, American... ♪

- We are the largest and fiercest tour

starring drag queens in the world.

- ♪ My, my, my, my country tis of thee ♪

♪ These are all my friends, we are a family ♪

- Oh! - Aah!

- ♪ This is who I am and who I wanna be ♪

[cheers and applause]

- ♪ I am American, American, American ♪

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

- Wow. What's you doing?

- Ladies and gentlemen, Alyssa Edwards.

- The show has officially begun.

[cheers and applause]

- Alyssa, mama. - Alyssa.

- [laughs] That's my crazy sister.

- Oh, Miss Mama, Miss Thing.

- Alyssa Edwards is on 24 hours.

What you see is what you get.

If you think Alyssa's secret

or her persona on "RuPaul's Drag Race"

was at all manufactured or forced, it isn't.

It was probably even held back.

She is cocaine in high heels.

[cheers and applause]

[indistinct conversations in Spanish]

- And if you don't love yourself,

how the hell you gonna love somebody else?

- Oh, that's pretty.

- Are we even gonna get to experience the city?

- Tomorrow.

[laughs]

She's loca. [laughs]

- Good morning.

- It's 4:00, guys. - My bag's not over there.

- What? What does your bag look like?

- This one?

- How's my hair look?

- Hot, baby. - A hot mess?

- Alyssa came for a couple of shows,

and we had some sleepovers while she was here.

- She came in like a thunderstorm.

She turned it out, she hit it.

- How you feeling?

- Well, girl, how do you feel?

- Well, rushed. - Exactly.

- Well, how do you feel, girl? Look.

- I'm chippy-chirpy, though. I'm awake.

Don't be a drag, just be a queen.

Oh, my gosh, my body.

I need to go to a gym.

I need to wake up.

Laid up in that little casket thing like this.

- It's like sleeping in a coffin.

- It's the classic way to open a bottle.

Girl, not while she's peeing. Oh, my gosh.

Will you warn somebody before you just whip that thing on out?

- I was trying to close the door.

- Well, I need to open my Sprite.

Wait. - [laughs]

- It's the wrong--aah!

[all laugh]

- Well, that's close.

- That is awesome. Oh, my God, girl.

- That's my drag mother.

She comes in, she's Mama.

She comes in, she goes,

Miss Shangie, what's going on over here?

Oh, my gosh, girl.

[sighs]

Let's do it, girl. Let's do it for the fans, Mama.

Let's just press play, baby. Let's just do it.

- There's only one shower, baby. Do you wanna go first?

- Yes. - Okay, go ahead.

- Just jump in. We're about to have a shower together, sweetie.

Jump in. - Okay.

Do you want to shower together?

- Just jump in.

- Are you in the shower?

- Yeah, I'm going. - Aah.

- Now I have to find an open shower.

Y'all, are you using your shower yet?

Can I use your shower?

How can you reach that?

The showerhead is like hanging in there.

- Is there only three showers?

- Yeah, I think so.

I'm on a scavenger hunt for one right now.

Excuse me, guys. Do you know a shower?

[speaking Spanish]

Are there any more showers?

Four? Thank you.

Okay, well, I haven't counted four yet.

I counted three, so that's good.

Honestly, it's probably not in this direction.

No, I'm not going down there. Mm-mm.

That's where people get killed at.

Valentina's in there. Is she in the shower yet?

- Yes.

- Girl, this is not glamour.

Now you don't want me to shower with her.

She's like, Alyssa, just get in the shower with me.

Girl, what is this?

Girl, what is going on?

What is going on when I'm not here?

Is this going on?

A family that drags together and showers together

will I guess fucking live together forever.

- Y'all give that woman hot water next time.

- We ain't got no hot water? Now we're gonna conserve.

Now we're gonna conserve in Madrid.

Voss Events. This is Brandon Voss.

Can I interview Brandon Voss?

I am Alyssa Edwards, live on location with Brandon Voss

for the Voss Events.

He's eating Pringles.

We're conserving hot water,

and the dancers are eating Snickers.

Kennedy is over there trying to figure out what day it is.

Shangela, if I don't got hot water,

you gonna boil me some.

- Boil me some?

- You drug me into this, you're gonna drag me out.

And I mean drag.

Now where's the hot water, sweets?

[all laugh]

- This is what I'm gonna do when I get tired of all y'all.

I'm just gonna sit right here--

- Oh, yeah.

- And turn into Hannibal Lecter.

- This one has water pressure and hot water.

- Where?

- This one has water pressure and hot water.

- Don't use it all day. Come on.

Save me just an ounce.

Whose is these?

- Ahh, hot water!

Thank you.

♪ I am a woman ♪

- This is not glamour.

This is not what I signed up for.

- Her glue and Elmer's glue

on her face is glamour.

- The glamour is gone.

- Y'all think the glamour only lives on the stage,

but it starts when I wake up, girl.

- Tell me how you really feel, girl.

All I know is right now--

- I thought you were hopping in with your daughter?

- It's 5:00.

No, because I need to take a luxury shower by myself.

- No, there's no luxury here. You just literally told me,

"Valentina, you cannot be taking no luxury showers."

You sure as hell is not gonna be taking no damn luxury shower,

because there's no motherfucking luxury here, bitch,

to even think that.

- ♪ So cold ♪

- If I wanted luxury, I could have luxury

because I'm-- - Not here, bitch.

- You could never have luxury, because you know what?

You're not that type of girl.

- Well, everything that I have with me is luxury and glamour.

- Oh, it is? - Yes.

- Zoom in.

- No, don't zoom in on my makeup kit.

- Zoom in.

- Don't you dare zoom in on my makeup kit.

I'll fuck you up, World of Wonder.

- And she said "zoom in."

- Can you jiggle, Valentina?

- Push them together, though.

Poor Guadalupe. She did not sign up for this.

- Oh!

Aah!

Turn the--No! This stupid, raggedy shower.

And I look soaking wet.

This is not that kind of video. Thank you, baby.

All the cues and all the lights, okay.

All the subscriptions go out together.

- I'm very excited.

- [speaking Spanish]

- They're gonna be in living color.

- You know when you go to these meet-and-greets,

you've gotta put on extra perfume, extra deodorant,

get your Altoids, get your fans,

and, honey, get yourself together.

You gotta be gathered around.

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today...

- Degree?

- Yep, Degree, yep. - Here we go.

- Okay, this is interesting. Go.

- Got it? - Wow, yes, Jon.

More deodorant, honey.

I don't sweat, but just in case if she does sweat.

If she does sweat.

- Ooh.

You like that?

- I do.

- Alyssa Edwards, she can do no wrong.

- You changed my life.

I'm about to faint.

- Thank you. Don't faint! - Can we hold hands?

- Don't faint! - I won't faint.

- She is one of the most popular ones of all time,

and so she has a lot of big things coming to her,

and a lot of things coming at her.

- Oh, my God, I love you so much, Alyssa, you're amazing.

- Thank you.

Hi, boys.

- You look amazing.

- Alyssa maybe. [speaking Spanish].

- Alyssa. Alyssa. I love Alyssa.

I love everything of her. I love everything.

- Mwah, mwah, mwah. - Mwah, mwah.

- Hi. - Hello.

- I love you.

- She said, "yes."

- Faster! [all laugh]

Oh, she was ready.

- One, two.

- Ooh. Honey. Ooh.

Ooh.

I feel like Bibi Bean. - Mm-hmm.

- Feel like Bibi Bean. - Mm-hmm.

- Feel like the baby daddy.

Hi, baby daddy. Hi, baby daddy.

Where's my money?

Where's my money from the show you did the other night?

Thank you so very much, Madrid.

All of you were so fabulous in the meet-and-greet.

Fuck.

Let me do that again. I didn't like that one.

We gotta do a take two. We gotta do a take two.

Ooh, that lighting might be too bright, honey.

You gotta adjust the lights. You gotta adjust the lights.

Thank you, Madrid. The meet-and-greet was fabulous.

It's showtime, folks. [clucks tongue]

Nope, now there's a shadow, see?

Y'all got my shadow.

- ♪ You know how she does ♪

- [humming]

- Get in.

- I got the clips in my hair.

- That's okay. I'm on a roll, bitch.

- Okay, ready? Get in more.

Get up on me, girl.

- I gotta pull this flip aside.

- There's Shangie and Alyssa!

- Ready.

- Look at that quaff. Clips.

- Get that good light. - Oh, you look good, gal.

You look stunning. - Ooh, hello.

- Let me see. - That's awful, girl.

- Alyssa. She is not from this universe.

She's crazy. She is a celebrity.

You know, like she is a diva.

- Okay, Nicholas, you ready?

Get that black and white dress, and let's cover the house.

- I don't mean diva like in a bad sense,

but everything about her is just larger than life.

- When the scissors come missing--where's my stuff?

- Mrs. Thing--Alyssa Edwards, the House of Edwards.

Where do I begin? [laughs]

Alyssa carries herself in a very grand way,

and rightfully so most of the time.

[cheers and applause]

- Oh, I can always know

there's gonna be a good time with Alyssa

when she's here, honey,

because we go through the shenanigans, honey,

and we gonna go through rigor mortis.

She is fine, and she can stay ready as well.

[laughs] And she don't give a shit.

She's gonna be ready when she get ready.

But she also delivers.

The fans love her.

Her personality is beyond beyond.

[cheers and applause]

[singing in Spanish]

- Um, some wipes, please, doll.

[clicks tongue]

Shangie?

Uh, Kenny?

Kenny, Shangie?

Where'd they go? Do y'all know where they went?

Oh, Lord, child, Jesus save me.

God save the queen.

- Seven, eight. One, two, three, four,

five, six, seven, eight.

Two, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

- Thank you. Yes.

Thank you so-- thank you so much.

Oh, my gosh, thank you!

Look at this what this fan gave me.

Look at all of these gifts.

I show up over here, honey.

Look, this is the coolest thing.

Me in the pageant, me with my dance kids.

Look at this. I love this.

Me when I won all the pageants.

Me with my sisters.

That was Christmas Eve. I remember that.

Me and my daughters.

Me and RuPaul, my inspiration.

This is a career. A career.

Amazing. These people come to these meet-and-greets

and they give us these things

and it makes it all worth it, it all worthwhile.

And that's really what it's about, honey.

Don't get me wrong, the paycheck is lovely.

But at the end of the day, you spend the money

and you're left with a million memories.

And look at all these boys running around in their panties.

- Like that?

- Like that.

Uh-huh.

Valentina created her own station.

Brush the back of that.

- I said I'm not done yet.

- Oh, my gosh.

Oh-ho. - Say, huh.

- I love Valentina. I love working with Valentina.

She's so sweet. She's like my little god-niece.

- She's such a great role model to look up to,

and a great energy to be around,

because she's always been so supportive of me.

She's always given me such great advice,

she's always believed in me

and told me, "you're a star. Keep going."

"Keep going, you're doing great," you know?

- What is your favorite part

about being on the "Werq the World" tour?

- Do you wanna sniff my tights?

We've been--I've been using this

for I don't know how many cities.

You wanna smell them?

You know the smell of old tights.

- I'm your friend, not your fan.

No, I do not wanna sniff your panties,

your undergarments, nor your tights, darling.

- But doesn't drag have such a smell?

[sniffs] It smells like drag.

- Mine does: Chanel No. 5.

- Oh, bitch.

- Oh, you like that.

- I don't smell no perfume.

- Darling-- - I do not smell not--mm-mm.

- Take your allergy pill, honey--

- No, baby.

- And clear your sinuses, and take a whiff.

- No, Baby. Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba.

Er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er-er.

[laughs]

- Wow.

- I am the queen that coined the smelling good of a queen.

I'm that queen.

- Why are you blocking?

I'm trying to walk to my dresser.

You keep blocking-- thank you, doll.

Roll out the red carpet.

- Roll out the red carpet? [laughs]

[cheers and applause]

- Alyssa has such an amazing artistic intent

to what she does.

The first thing she does when she comes into a theater

and says, "where can I come from

"that allows me to be

a more immersive performer with the audience?"

And she will find a little platform

that nobody else has noticed

out in the middle of the audience,

and she'll figure out a way

to come from the balcony down through the audience.

And really, it's about not just performing,

but connecting with the audience.

And she is intent on making as much of a physical impact

and connecting with that audience as possible.

And it's an amazing thing

to watch her perform and bring that to life.

[cheers and applause]

- Now that's a motherfucking rush, bitch.

- Huh? - That was everything.

- Was it? Look at this.

- You see any nails?

- Leo, come on, baby.

Unzip.

Girl, that makes it all worth it, bitch.

- Was it lovely, gal?

- They beat the walls.

That was the night that the lights, honey,

went all the way out in Barcelona.

Now go out there and carry on.

Go on out there, Miss Shange.

- Yeah!

- Honey, the showgirls.

Whew.

One day I'm gonna write a book.

Girl, the mem-wars of a traveling queen.

Wars. And when I say "wars,"

there's a lot of wars in my head, honey.

But I'll tell you,

the ultimate war is being out there on that stage.

- Whew. - Excuse me.

- In Barcelona.

The feeling, the excitement,

whew, it's worth it.

Oh, my gosh, look at me.

All this money. It costs so much money.

I'm looking at all this, I'm adding it up.

I gotta get in my closing, honey.

And then the show never stops.

- Never stops.

- You go from one to the next.

I'm gonna put this closing outfit on. Whew.

This is the Texas takeover.

- Oh, it's always Texas, honey. - Okay.

It's the Texas takeover.

Shangie, Texas. Me, Texas. You, Texas.

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

- It's been lovely, bitch.

- Whoo!

- It was the lights, the cameras, and the people.

- Good show!

- Ladies, that was a good show!

- Oh, my God, I'm ugly.

- Thank you for coming with us.

- Oh, no, thank you so much.

Thank you. This was so much fun.

Thank you, baby. Thank you.

It was truly a pleasure. - Yes.

- Thank you guys for having us. It was a great show tonight.

- Thank you. - Great show. Thank you.

Well, the pageant's over, honey.

The pageant's over,

and Valentina was my lovely first alternate.

- Oh, bitch, please.

- And you know what? You know what?

- You gotta speak Spanish.

- [speaking Spanish]

- Barcelona, muchas gracias.

- [speaking Spanish]

[both speaking Spanish]

- Oh, so fuck my trade. [laughs]

- So fuck my rose.

- Hi!

- I knew I was destined for something, honey.

I'll look back one day and say, "girl, you did that.

"You did that.

You're a little gay boy from Mesquite."

[cheers and applause]

- Alyssa's secret, honey-- she was sharing secrets

all around the world, and aye-yah-yah.

I'm gonna write that book and unveil the real secret,

the secret to being an entertainer, you know,

beating that inner saboteur voice, loving the stage.

[cheers and applause]

- Girl.

- Thank you. That was fabulous, you guys.

Mama's gotta go!

That was it, honey. She Werqed the World!

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

She Werqed the World,

and good night.

And never in a million years did I believe

that I would be traveling to Madrid

being a cross-dresser.

A full-scale drag queen, drag performer,

female illusionist, impersonator,

never in a million years did I believe I'd be in Madrid

being Alyssa Edwards, something created from scratch.

And you guys, thank y'all. - Thank you.

- Thank you. Good day and good night, okay?

- Bye. Hasta luego!

- Hasta luego, baby.