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Hi, it's Jackie. Leave me a message and I'll call you back.
Who is it?
Hello, who is it?
Michael.
Oh.
You're early.
I guess.
Have you been waiting out there long?
Just a few seconds. I heard music.
Yeah, I was just listening.
I didn't know I couldn't hear the bell, so...
Oh.
I know what that's like.
Yeah.
Come in.
That light's kind of Twilight Zoney.
Sorry, they won't fix it.
Oh, no harm, no foul.
- This is nice. - Thanks.
Really nice.
Can I take your coat?
No, I'm OK.
Oh.
I got this for you.
Ooh.
Wine, huh?
I don't know what you like but...
This looks great.
Let's have some.
Oh, you don't have to open it.
You don't drink?
No, you can save it for another time.
You don't have to open it, you know, just because I brought it.
N0, let's, uh, let's have some.
This is a real view.
Yeah, it's probably why I stay here, you know?
I need to see the city and the people.
How long have you lived here?
Oh my God, could it be, I think 5 years?
Here you go.
I didn't know if you'd be here or not.
What do you mean?
Well, I saw you in Grayson's office, you know, at 5 and...
You didn't know I'd get here so early and...
Well, you know, Ijust...
Ijust left a few minutes early so...
Good.
You got dinner going already?
Yeah.
Nothing too fancy.
I hope you like seafood.
What?
It's just the word "seafo0d“.
It gives me the creeps.
I guess.
I don't know if it's a genetic thing or you had a
traumatic experience when you first hear a word,
But some words embarrass you, you know, like
"ritzy" or, you know, "spigot".
You know, most French words?
- But the scallops. - I love them.
Oh, good.
Hate the word.
What?
Just kidding.
Oh.
Jeez, you know, these things scare me.
Oh, well, they're pretty safe.
Do you know how they work?
Yeah, it's the uh...
you know, it's the...
microwaves.
Yeah, it's the waves. You know, they go in, they heat the food up it's...
it's the waves.
No, no, not exactly.
You see, microwaves are powerful low-frequency electromagnetic waves.
When they strike an organic substance,
they make the molecules vibrate,
vibrations heat, that's how they work.
Oh. That's pretty cool.
Do you like science?
Uh, yeah, sure.
I guess.
Especially those animal science kinds of things. You know, the...
the nature specials.
The nature specials are great.
You know, when the animals do all those kinds of things?
You know, birds?
Are really dinosaurs.
A bird.
No, no, when the big dinosaurs went extinct
the little ones survived.
And, and, uh,
You see, birds and dinosaurs both have hollow bones
and the feathers have really just evolved from scales.
I always thought that was really amazing.
Wow.
That's pretty cool. Where did you learn all this stuff?
Um, I read a lot and...
Ijust remember stuff.
I love reading.
And books.
Like, I remember all the telephone numbers
of all my friends from grammar school.
Really? - Oh yeah. Like, urn...
My friend, Mickey Hobart...
His telephone number was 869-3740.
Are you sure?
What do you mean?
I thought it was, actually, it was 3704.
How do you... I don't know how you...
I'm just joking.
Oh, yeah.
It's funny.
See, I remember telephone numbers by memorizing the uh...
the form or the pattern for the number like...
Mickey's is 37403 from 7 is 4 so...
Yeah, but... - What?
Well, if you're going to go to all the trouble
like, to remember the equation, you know...
And all the ways this equals that
wouldn't it just be easier to like remember the number?
Or write the number down?
You see, the brain, by subdividing the task,
increases the retention.
Oh.
Right.
I get it.
Are you sure? See, 'cause if you have a pencil and paper...
I get it. Thanks.
Great.
The brain's amazing.
What's in there?
Oh, that's my dressing room.
Where do you sleep?
Oh, this.
You know, it's uh...
It folds out. It's uh...
You know, you can...Y0u can see in those apartments.
It's wild, isn't it?
It's so strange. Sometimes I'll be on a subway, you know,
and I'll look out the window
at the crowded sidewalks or...no
I'll be on a bus
looking out the window at the crowded sidewalks
and it's like, it's hard for me to believe sometimes
that I have, you know, a life.
You know, it's like, I'm going through all this stuff and it's like
we're not all just like extras, you know?
- Y0u mean like in a movie? - Yeah.
It's like, I don't know, we're not really here.
We don't really have lives.
Well, I'd have thought that you would
feel real and everybody else was an extra.
Yeah, but...
N0, no, not really. It's not the same thing.
What? - Sorry.
No, it's just all those apartments, you know, it's...
It's so, uh...
Yeah. - Yea h.
Are you all right?
I'm fine.
I don't know. It's just just weird having you here, that's all.
What do you mean?
Well, I mean, you know, we've always
we've always been in the office, right?
- Y0u know, all the time in the office. - Yes, in the office.
And so now, here you are.
I mean, you know, we talk and we laugh every day.
You're so funny.
You know how you know someone one way
for like months and months and this this it's just wild, you know?
Yeah.
It's very pleasant here.
Do you want some more wine?
I didn't know if you drank.
Uh, sure, I'll have...
I don't drink that much, you know.
Just sometimes at night, sometimes on the weekends.
So...
What's your place like?
- Oh, my apartment? - Yeah.
It's just an apartment. It's a one bedroom on the east side.
Oh, on the east side, huh?
I like the east side.
I used to live on the east side.
But um, It started getting on my nerves.
Oh yeah, mine didn't have a view.
I couldn't live without a view.
I mean, I need to see the city and the people.
To the extras.
To the extras, right.
What?
I love being in on those meetings.
What meetings?.
You know, like with Sanders today when you were giving him a hard time.
I wasn't giving him a hard time.
What are you talking about?
You do it to him all the time.
Oh, well.
Paralegals aren't supposed to have opinions according to Sanders.
At least you get to open up your mouth
which is more than his executive assistants, right?
Is that what they call the secretaries now?
Yeah. That's what it says on my paycheck.
I guess this is a lull.
Yeah.
It's funny, you know, I always know what to say in the office.
Yeah, the office.
S0, um...
S0, where did you grow up?
Long Island.
- Oh, wow, really. That's just.. - Oh, excuse me.
I hope this comes out OK.
Oh, right, scallops.
So I made this on the weekend and,
and I, uh, froze it.
I make all my meals on the weekends and I microwave them during the week.
It's very strange.
It's like on a Saturday or Sunday when I'm cooking,
It's like I'm making four or five meals all at once.
Yeah, it's ready. Are you still hungry?
Oh, sure.
Yeah?
I don't know. Maybe we should wait.
Oh, no. Let's eat.
Yeah?
- Yeah. - OK.
Did you want your glass?
Uh, yeah, please.
Yeah, it's so strange to be making all this stuff.
It's like when I'm clone, the week is over. I can't really explain it.
Oh, I hope this comes out OK.
What I do is make all my meals on the weekend and
and I microwave them during the week.
It's very strange.
So strange to be making all this stuff
It's like when I'm done, the week is over.
I can't really explain it.
Um, so...
D0 you have brothers and sisters?
What makes you ask that?
I don't know, we were talking about where you grew up and...
Oh, right. Well, uh...
Yeah, I have uh...
Seven brothers and sisters.
Wow.
Yeah, five brothers and uh...
Two sisters.
- Big family. - Yeah.
Big family.
Never a dull moment. All that shit.
This is really good.
Thanks.
You know, sometimes the freezing and the reheating of food
makes things better.
Scallops are like that. That's why I chose this one.
It's like a cryonic dinner.
That was a joke, wasn't it?
It's taking me a while but I think I'm starting to get you.
Thanks.
You know, they uh...
They say all kinds of things about you, right?
Who?
Your partners.
Really? Like what?
Well...
They say that you have this weird smirk on your face.
Like you're making fun of them.
Really?
They call you Mr. Strange.
That's fascinating.
I mean, just some of them.
I just tell that you're insecure.
What do you mean?
Well, you know.
I thought that someone should say something 'cause
You know, they see us talking all the time.
Oh, so you're trying to help me.
Oh. I don't know.
I think it's kind of sweet how you're insecure.
Well, I don't see myself as insecure
and you really don't have to go around apologizing to those jerks for
for something that I haven't even done.
Yeah, but I mean...
I mean, you do like to smile and laugh a lot
when people say things that the...
wrong moment or
maybe not at the wrong moment but like
when no one else is laughing, right?
It's called a sense of humor.
I find life amusing.
I especially like
being called that at Cantville, Keller and Jacobson.
You can say that again.
-1 was... - You are, aren't you?
What?
Well, you know, I just said,
"You can say that again."
I just thought that maybe as a joke you might say it again, right?
No, I wasn't.
You're so funny.
But that was really funny with Sanders today.
Oh, it's not hard. He's such a slow-moving target.
You should have seen his face
when he opened up that envelope
from the opposing attorney and it was his own brief.
Really?
I don't know, how did you get the nerve
to send the opposing attorney all of Sander's evidence in the case?
I mean like couldn't they have arrested you or something?
See, what I don't get is that they sent it back without even opening it.
They don't care about what's right or wrong in these cases.
It's completely rigged.
It's like junior high school. It's like a big club.
They're going to fire you eventually, you know?
They feel guilty about me.
Because they know I'm right.
If they'd fire me, it would only prove their own guilt.
I wouldn't be too sure 0f that.
You know, I save their asses daily.
That's what they're paying me. They're not going to fire rne.
You know...
When I first got to the firm,
I thought that you were one of
one of the partners.
Really?
You know, the way you walked around
talking to everybody, I thought you were one of the lawyers.
This is a joke, right? You're kidding rne.
I mean in a good way, you know?
You seem
important.
And of course, the way that you dress differently from
the other paralegals.
Oh. It's just an old suit.
Yeah, well, none of the other paralegals wear suits.
You don't think I wear suits so that people will think I'm a lawyer, do you?
I don't know. I never really thought about it.
'Cause it would kill me ifl thought I was anything like those guys.
Maybe I should wear those button-down shirts
with the khaki pants and the desert boots, all that shit.
No, you're not like them.
Were you disappointed I was just a measly paralegal?
I don't care about that. I'm just saying
that it was funny seeing you after that
you know, that's all.
You shouldn't encourage me, you know.
Why not?
What are you going to do?
So...
I'm an executive assistant.
Right, as we established.
Well, I made it to Manhattan.
Manhattan's great.
You know, I've lived in this apartment building for over five years
and I've never had a conversation with anybody?
Really.
And some 0f them I don't even say hello to.
- W0w. - Where did you grow up?
Just outside the city in Westchester.
That must have been great, huh?
Yeah, it was OK.
I always wanted to live in Manhattan. I don't know why.
I can't explain it really but, you know...
You know when there's just something you gotta do? It's like...
Something you just...
gotta do?
You know what I mean?
When I was thirteen,
I listened to the Beatles song "She Loves You"
and
Ah, it's crazy...I shouldn't...
- Never mind. - Come on, tell me.
Well, during the song, I kept hearing
my name over and over, you know, Michael
...Michael.
What are you doing?
Oh, I...
I was just trying to fit "Michael" in...
with the words like you said.
Oh. No, No it was...
Subliminal. It was
Deep...it was part of the song and uh...
I don't know. I can't explain it.
That's cool.
So why are you looking at me like I'm crazy?
I'm not looking at you like you're crazy.
I think that's sweet.
What was that?
I was just...
Ijust never told anybody about that.
Yeah. N0, I know. I understand 'cause you know
I had something like that happen to me once.
- Oh, really? With the Beatles? - N0
Not with the Beatles.
I mean, it wasn't so dramatic.
But uh... Yeah, it was something like that.
'Cause when I was a kid, I loved The Iliad.
See, I wanted to have a, uh...
A heroic life, you know, life of action?
Was that a good book? I never read it.
The best. We used to have these big fights with
garbage can covers and wooden swords and
I used to beat everybody.
That's the international sign
-for wooden sword play. - Oh.
I had a very high tolerance to pain.
Cool.
So, where did you go to college?
This technical school in the Bronx.
It was free because 1 was a resident.
Oh, I thought you were from Long Island.
Yeah, I was born in Long Island but I moved around a lot.
Where did you go to school?
Harvard.
You mean, The Harvard?
Yeah, it's no big deal.
I always wanted to go to a real college.
Like uh...
An Ivy League school or something like that.
But...
My parents they didn't want me to.
You see, they wanted me to work for my uncle.
And I said that I'd never do that.
I'd rather kill myself first.
Wow. Harvard.
I hated it. It was stupid.
You shouldn't say that. People would kill to go there.
People do kill to go there.
Excuse me.
It was totally...
It's taken me years to overcome the effects of that place. It was totally...
You know, racist and sexist and corrupt.
Well, I'm impressed.
Don't be.
I watch you at work, you know?
You do, do you?
You're doing something, aren't you?
What do you mean?
You keep writing things down.
Writing things down?
Yeah, you did it just before. It's in your jacket pocket.
Oh, that. I'm...
Just taking a note.
I knew it.
You know, I was saying to myself
He's doing something. He's, he's...
Writing something. He's writing something like a...
Like maybe a book?
Oh, no, just...
NOIQS.
Did somebody say something about a book?
N0.
But that's what you're doing, right?
Id0n't really uh...
Want to talk about it 'cause uh...
Come on, you can tell me.
Well, I don't really like to...
- Talk about it 'cause uh... - I'm not going to tell anyone. Trust me.
- Well, you'll have to promise that... - I promise.
Well I'm writing uh...
It's going t0 be a book.
Wow. That is cool.
I'm writing a book about lawyers.
Really? What's it about?
Well, it's going to be called “The Business of Justice...
A lot of people handling me wanted me to call it
"Justice for Sale" but that's too commercial.
It's a wrong way. This is not an axe- grinding kind of book.
It's about uh...
How money drives the system.
How right and wrong and good and bad
have become relative terms in relation to
the economic weight they carry.
I'm writing about all those lonely,
damaged, crippled pe0ple...you know, the people that make
this country what it is.
The things I've seen working at that firm.
They're going to be pissed off at you.
Good.
What, you're not afraid of what they can do to you?
What are they gong to do to me?
I don't have anything.
I'm the kind of person that thinks
why be in a museum
and look at paintings if you can paint your own painting?
I mean, do things for yourself.
Do you have somebody come in and sleep with your wife for you?
D0 you pay somebody to eat your foocl for you?
D0 things yourself. That's what life's about.
There's so many people doing things they hate.
And people running the country who all they care about is keeping their jobs,
and not doing their jobs. And there's so little real love in the work that I see.
I've been...
I've been in many
in camera sessions. In camera. D0 you know what that means?
No, I...n0.
"In camera" is Latin. It means "in the room“.
It means that anything said in the room has to stay there.
If you don't understand something, just ask.
Yeah, I know, I know but they, you know, they...
They get upset with me whenever I do so...
You can't let them do that to you.
You have to get over that.
Yeah, I know, you're right.
I've got this little tape recorder.
With the things I've recorded, I'm going to blow them out 0f the water.
I can't believe that.
It's like I've worked for...
in offices, you know, for years but
I've never even bothered myself to get involved.
I don't know. I guess I just
you know, feel responsible.
Yeah, I know, I know.
I guess it's different for you.
What? Do you feel intimidated?
N0.
I guess it must be like uh...
A background thing like where you grew up.
Something like that.
You mean like the Harvard thing.
I was just kidding.
It was a joke.
S0.
You uh...
You must have read a lot of law books.
What?
- Law books. - Oh, law books. I went to law school.
Oh, you went to law school, huh?
Yeah, but I didn't finish.
Well, what happened?
I mean, if you don't mind me asking.
Oh.
I had enough credits. I mean almost enough.
To graduate.
Well, you just left?
It was an act of personal protest.
Against the system. I couldn't take it anymore.
I had to take a stand.
You're amazing.
So...
You want some dessert?
N0, I'm pretty full.
You want some coffee?
Oh, uh, no.
You want something to drink?
I've got some hard stuff.
Oh, like drugs.
Oh, but that was really good.
Thanks.
You know, Ijust
threw it together over the weekend.
S0.
S0, you're writing a book about the firm.
Well, no, it's not really about them.
You've been working on it a long time?
Almost 15 years.
You've been at the firm that long?
9h, r10, no, no.
Only 13.
Oh, 13 years. Oh my god!
That's like a kid's whole lifetime.
I mean, you know, like if a kid...
You know, if a kid...
S0, you must have
written a lot of it already.
Yeah, I'm almost done.
That's so exciting.
I'm just doing what I have to do.
Well, maybe I could help you.
Oh, I don't know.
Are you afraid I'm going to screw it up for you or something?
Oh, no, nothing like that. It's just...
Well I'm probably gonna...
end up losing my job. And I couldn't expect you to lose yours 'cause...
I'll end up with a book.
Yeah.
Right.
I guess.
You know that Sanders case?
The one I was telling you about?
It's about this young kid.
And there's this guy who's
obviously abusing the kid.
And he's using the firm to get custody.
It's completely disgusting and...
The lawyers at the firm know
what they're doing is wrong and they keep doing it.
And they couldn't need the money. How much money could they need?
And they know this is never going to end and...
so!
I'm recording the whole thing.
And...
I'm going to write about those lonely, damaged,
and crippled people and...
And even if I only help a little bit,
then I'll feel like I've done some good.
God, it even sounds like a book when you talk.
I shouldn't, you know... I'm telling you about too much.
No, no, I mean...
It's great to hear you talk about something that you're excited about.
I think it's important to have a sense of history.
When I think about where I am...
I feel OK.
Think back 0n the 19th century.
These doctors and lawyers and
politicians and people getting rich
and seeming famous, I bet
if you asked people back then
who'd be remembered, they'd come up with a list of people that
you'd never heard of.
A huge percentage of the people we honor today
were completely obscure back then.
Like
Van Gogh and
and Emily Dickinson and Schubert.
You know, and just...
makes me laugh when I think about those self important people.
The partners at the firm who...
They'll be dead soon and
no 0ne's going t0 mention their name again ever. Even in contempt.
Well, what about their families?
Well, that doesn't mean anything.
I mean, who else are they going to talk about?
That's happenstance.
No, I...
I don't think people feel that way about their families.
Well, you want to be...
part of Keller's family? Imagine him being like you father or your
-brother or... - Your husband?
No, I couldn't imagine that.
I bet if you gave people in his family
the choice, they'd dump him in a second.
I'm talking too much about this.
Yeah.
What do you mean?
I'm only joking.
It's really good to hear you talk about something you're excited about
I guess because I never talk about it, when i get going, it's hard to stop.
Guys do that when they're scared.
Oh, I'm not scared, it's...
Ijust feel like I have something to say.
I mean, not like the other lawyers at the firm.
Well, do you see me inviting them home for dinner?
-1 didn't mean it like...I was...didn't.. - Trust me, I don't.
I can't believe the kinds 0f relationships that people have.
It's amazing the things that people settle for.
Like if you're walking along the street,
and you see a couple?
And it's hard to imagine them sleeping together?
Right, like your parents.
My parents?
Not your parents.
Well, what do you mean?
Forget it.
Well, you don't have to apologize.
All right, well, like when I
was younger and I was growing up and
I was learning about the facts of life and all that
It was always hard for me
t0 believe that my parents actually
did it.
It kind of creeped me out.
Oh.
S0 you think I'm projecting my parental incest fantasies
on the authority figures at work.
You're joking with me, aren't you?
Who, me?
That's so cool.
S0, do you want something else?
No, I'm OK.
What? Did I say something?
Oh, Ijust never tell anybody what I'm doing with the book.
What book?
Right. It just makes me nervous.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Well, anyway...
Yeah, I do a little writing too.
- Really? - Yeah.
Well, it's just since I've come to Manhattan.
- Like plays or novels? - No, just stories.
Wow. That's really interesting.
Yeah, I don't tell people either.
Like you.
Well, maybe not like you 'cause it's not like I have anything
to say like you.
I don't want to seem like a snob or anything but...
but...
I'm actually embarrassed by
by writing stories.
Why?
All right, I'll tell you.
You see, I write children's stories.
You know, kid's stories.
Bed time kinds of things.
Ijust feel kind of stupid.
You shouldn't.
A lot of great writers
They write children's stories
like Stevenson and
Tolkien and Swift.
Oh, yeah.
I never really thought of that.
Maybe you could show them to me some time.
You know that uh,
I was attracted to you because I thought you were a writer?
I mean, I never meet writers, right?
I went to some of those poetry things
I read about a couple of years ago in the [Village] Voice.
But I didn't know what anybody was talking about. It was crazy.
And this guy hit on me and I felt so stupid I had to leave.
Then I bought that magazine, The New Yorker.
Do you know that magazine?
- Yeah. - Yeah.
I never opened it up, you know, I felt so...
I was so afraid that somebody would find it
on my coffee table s01 hid it.
But I like lyrics.
I don't get some of it sometimes but
I think it's cool. D0 you like lyrics?
Sometimes.
So...
I go t0 work every day, you know?
On the weekends I write these little stories, you know?
I'm really lonely and I miss my family and everything.
Well, I call them and...
They never know what to say to me- They feel like I'm not the same person.
Well, you know families.
Butl really enjoyed growing up with my brothers
and sisters and everything, you know.
It was one of those big family kinds of things and everything.
Oh, God.
- I'm really going on, aren't I? - Oh, no, no.
You dying over there?
No, I'm fine.
Really?
Really.
But I like music.
To me,
that's where some of the best writing is.
Like I said, before, you know?
You know, lyrics?
Sometimes I go into used record stores
just to sit and read the words to the music.
Oh, you mean like librettos.
Yeah.
The librettos.
I like Air Supply.
D0 you know that group from Australia?
And Deep Purple.
Yeah.
With Deep Purple it's not so much the words, it's more of a musical thing.
I used to go to all their concerts when I was younger, and I'd go crazy.
That's when I was living in
in Queens before I moved to Manhattan.
I was still wastetressing.
I mean waitressing.
And you know, all the people I used to hang out with
They didn't go so much for the words 0r the music.
It was more like the drugs.
The fooling around on the beach after the concert.
God, I wonder where all those people went.
There were zillions of them. Zillions.
Waitresses, secretaries that I used to hang out with.
We used t0 do all that kind of stuff.
I'd love to hear one of your stories sometime.
Well, I mean, I could read you one.
Oh, you mean now?
N0, not now. I don't know. Maybe some other time, right?
WhY d0n't you?
You're just saying that.
I'd really like to hear one.
YOU H1680 it?
You have to stop being so insecure. I'd really like to hear it.
Really?
Really.
OK.
I can tell by your face you don't want to hear this.
Oh, no, no, I want to hear it.
- Y0u sure? - Yeah, yeah.
OK.
- What happened was... - What's the title?
That is the title.
“What happened was" is the title?
That's kind of funny.
- What's so funny?
No, no, no, it's great! It's really, go on.
You know, maybe this isn't a good idea.
No, come on, don't be stupid.
I didn't think I was being stupid.
I didn't...
I didn't mean it like that.
I'd love to hear it, please.
Go on.
- You sure? - Yeah.
OK.
"What happened was.
By Jackie.
- You know, Jackie Marsh. - Yeah.
Go on.
The Buick Regal screeched out of the Bangon Tavern parking lot.
Felix was drunk again.
In his lap
bobbed the head of one of the topless dancers from the club.
Up and down
they were going about 90 when
Excuse me.
The Buick Regal hit the endless curve and lost control.
Sparks lit the black nowhere countryside, revealing a house.
The car flipped as it reamed through the front yard.
The head came
flying out of the car.
As it exploded in a whoosh of fire.
A fat woman tumbled out of the burning house.
Her nightgown in flames.
Her skinny husband crawled
after down the front steps looking for his glasses.
Minnie and Wallace Meany.
The topless dancer was being body bagged
when from behind the house came the sound of crying.
And even though he couldn't see a thing
Wallace said,
“Jeez, is that a baby?"
"Yeah, isn't it yours?" asked the fireman
"N0, me and Minnie..." trailed off Wallace
Minnie and Wallace were childless in their middle age.
And at the insistence of Wallace,
they adopted the baby girl and called her
Mini Minnie.
The real trouble started when Little Minnie got to be a teenager.
Big Minnie got too fat to go out of the house.
S0 Wallace got a job selling baseball uniforms to
little league teams across the country.
Big Minnie sat in bed
and yelled for her food.
And made little Minnie go to the mall to rent videos for her.
Little Minnie was walking home from the mall late one night.
When a voice came from the bulrushes.
“Minnie."
“Mini Minnie,"
"1 know where you came from, Mini Minnie."
Minnie was always tortured by not knowing where she came from.
So she crept into the weeds
"You know where I came from?" asked Minnie.
Just then a dark figure grabbed Minnie and pulled her to the ground.
“If you want me to tell you,
you must let me do whatever I want to you." hissed the voice.
"No, please, can't you just tell me?“
"No, I need the inspiration."
"I really need it bad."
So Minnie gave in.
He did whatever he wanted to her.
Awful, unspeakable things.
But worse was what he said to her.
“Your mother would lay before any man
at any time and was always having babies.
But she hated the children.
And she needed to hide her pregnancies from her foolish husband.
She hid them by getting really fat.
And when the babies were born
she didn't know what to do with the babies.
But being hungry all the time,
she ate them."
"Oh, no, no" screamed little Minnie.
"Yes, yes, that's what she did.
Until one night,
when she was having her last baby,
there was a car crash that stopped her from eating her baby.
It crawled away during the confusion."
"You mean, Minnie is my real mother?"
“Yes" hissed the voice
as he violated her over and over again.
"No, she can't be." screamed Minnie.
The dark figure ran off leaving Minnie lying in the swamp.
She got up and went out to the road
and hitchhiked away.
She worked her way north as a topless go-go dancer.
She was always athletic.
After many nights, Minnie finally
found the site of the old Meany house.
She dug through the burned timbers
and in the basement, beneath a charred chrome Buick Regal insignia
she found a pile of baby bones.
She began at that moment her quest to bring Big Minnie to justice.
She worked her way back to Florida dancing at the same clubs along the way.
But she started having an awful dream.
It was so awful it even began to hurt her dancing.
She would wiggle so fiercely, it scared the men in the clubs.
The owners would warn her but she would reply,
"I can't control my dreams."
When she got back home, Little Minnie burst in the front door.
Big Minnie screamed, "Where have you been?"
“You never came back with my videos or my food."
Little Minnie rushed at the huge woman in a fury.
Little Minnie grabbed Big Minnie's face and screamed,
"1 have something for you to eat, Mother."
Little Minnie pinned Big Minnie down and
shoved all the baby bones down her throat.
Big Minnie died.
Choked on the bones of the children.
Little Minnie ran away to Miami
where she worked in clubs for months.
Every night she would wake up screaming ancl crying from her dream.
At the end of the summer,
Little Minnie came to see Wallace.
When he heard her coming, he jumped up
and they hugged each other crying.
Wallace begged her to stay.
S0 life went 0n for a while with Little Minnie living with Wallace.
She worked at Bob's Big Boy hamburger joint.
They went duckpin bowling, like in the old days.
But she kept having her dream.
Over and over.
About her twin sister.
She and her sister were unborn twins in Big Minnie's womb.
Through the walls of Big Minnie's body, she could hear fighting
between Wallace and Big Minnie.
Her twin was really scared.
And stuck her little fingers in her little ears.
But Little Minnie listened.
She knew there was only one way for her to live.
So she went over and talked to her twin.
She calmed her down
and told her that she should go out and
everything would be OK.
Her twin sister was so scared that she agreed to go.
In the dream, her sister was born.
And Little Minnie hid inside Big Minnie
listening to Wallace kill her sister.
Later that night, Little Minnie snuck out of Big Minnie
and was born secretly.
She crawled into the walls of the house
and hid.
She lived there for months.
Late at night, she'd sneak out and eat from the leftover food.
It was very lonely
living in the walls of the house.
That is, until the night of the crash.
Right at that moment, Little Minnie woke up.
And standing over her was Wallace smiling at her.
He came closer and whispered,
"I know what you've been dreaming."
When Little Minnie heard this, she jumped up.
Wallace stood up, laughing like a maniac.
“Dance for me, Minnie.“
"Dance for me like you dance for all those men."
"You and me
we're the same, Minnie.“
“We're killers.“
“You killed your twin sister. I know all about it.“
“And I know you killed Big Minnie."
"Poor, old, fat Big Minnie."
“Come back and be with me.“
"We can be happy.“
“You knew all about us."
"You always knew."
“You know..."
"You know, you were almost a year old
when you were found during that
that fire."
“You know you lived in the walls of our house."
"It all adds up."
“You were good at math in school, I know."
"Come back to me."
Minnie cried,
"I'll never come near you."
"I'd rather be dead."
"But you already have, Minnie."
“Don't you remember that night?"
"The swamp?"
"When I told you where you came from?"
“What do you mean?" cried Minnie.
And in a voice that Minnie remembered,
Wallace continued hissing.
"I know where you came from."
"N0." screamed Minnie.
"Yes.“
"Now be a good girl and come to Daddy."
Minnie turned and ran out to the road.
She quickly hitched a ride.
But his time she headed west.
The place where people go to forget.
She go-go danced her way west.
End of Chapter One.
Christ!
What?
That was a children's story?
Yeah.
Didn't you like it?
That was great. Um...
- It was just... - What?
S0 grown up. You know, the car crashes and the you know...
the topless bars.
Have you ever read the Grimm Brothers?
Not lately.
Well, you should. It's pretty heavy stuff.
Topless bars?
Worse, much worse.
That was wonderful.
Thanks.
You know, I have fun doing it.
That's the most important thing, right?
I think it's important t0 do something with the work.
To have people hear it.
I guess.
I think you should publish.
No really, I mean through my publisher, the one I'm working with.
I'm sure I could hook you up with someone.
I've been offered substantial advances but I'll probably hold out.
The longer you refuse to sell,
the more control you have over your book.
Like they'll say they love your book and
then you find out all they were really interested in was the
title or stuff about girls or...
I've been working with publishers for years and
they feel that I'm really ready for my success.
I told them I won't do talk shows.
I hate those things. I'd never do Letterman.
The guy doesn't get it. I'd never become part of the problem.
I'm not going to become another Jimi Hendrix.
He wasn't ready for success and it killed him.
But maybe I'll do radio interviews but no TV.
What is it?
Nothing.
Don't you want to publish?
- You shouldn't be scared. A lot of... - I've already published.
What do you mean?
I have a publisher.
- You have a publisher? - Yeah.
It's just a small company but, yeah.
How did you do that?
Oh, it was really cool.
One day I was reading this magazine that
that said that these guys were looking for unpublished works.
And so I sent them a copy of the book and
and they read it and really liked it.
And they said that they couldn't sell a lot of copies but
they could sell a few and we could see what would happen.
It was the happiest day of my life.
For me.
So I went down, I sent them the book
they read the book and
and yeah, they ended up doing the book.
But you got an advance, right?
No, well actually, I had to put up a little money for
the rights or some legal fees or something.
But they did a really great job.
In fact they even let me design the cover myself.
They said not everybody was allowed t0
design the covers themselves but they liked my design so...
It's never going to make the New York Times bestseller list but..
That's pretty good.
Do you want to see it?
Oh, sure.
I keep all my stuff under here because of my dreams.
Your dreams.
See?
This is really beautiful.
Thanks.
Have you sold many of these?
No, not many.
Why not?
I don't know. Ijust thought it was more important to get it printed.
So nob0dy's seen this?
I sent one to my parents.
What did they say?
We don't talk very much.
What are you laughing at?
Oh, nothing. Sorry it's just uh...
You know, it's families. They miss so much and then you...
And then you write a story like that.
Like what?
I don't...y0u know...
crazy and violent.
Oh.
Yeah, I never really thought about it.
Yeah, families, huh?
Ijust had to get away from mine. It was too much noise.
Mental static.
You know, sometimes I
I walk through that door. It's like I can finally breathe.
I don't have people's thoughts banging into my head.
Doesn't it get lonely or boring?
N0.
Remember I told you I used to run around a lot.
Oh, right.
Party girl.
Yeah, don't remind me.
The things I've done.
Like what?
I was young.
You know, when I first came to Manhattan,
I couldn't believe it sometimes.
Even if you never go to any of the cultural shit
or any of the plays or anything.
It's an amazing town. You can feel it.
Do lawyers...
I'm sorry. It's none of my business.
What?
Well, they must, you know...
Come on to you or, or...
You must have gotten some harassment or pressure or...
Yeah, it happens.
But you deal with it.
What are y0u..are you thinking that I've like...
slept with some of the lawyers from the firm?
Oh, no.
Because I haven't.
I mean, I was just..you know...
I mean, only a couple of times.
Right.
Would you relax? I'm only joking.
I haven't gone out with any of them, really.
Because you said you had a wild life.
Yeah, well, I'm sure you did all that kind of stuff.
Like what?
Like go crazy.
I guess I did in my own way but it wasn't...
I'm sure it was fun at the time.
Not really.
So...
Now I want to just
come home.
With your lonely apartment.
You know what it's like.
Uh huh.
Wow.
You know, I think...
I, uh, I better...
I have a surprise.
A surprise?
Sit down!
But I, uh...
What are you...
And close your eyes. It's a surprise.
What, what are you...
Surprise.
But it's
it's not my...it's not my birthday.
I know. It's my birthday.
Oh.
Well, it's really Sunday but I decided I would celebrate tonight.
Aren't you going to wish me a...
- Oh, happy birthday. - Thank you.
Oh, I need a knife.
You want some coffee?
No, no, I'm fine.
Ifl had known...
I told you last week and the week before. Twice.
Oh, right. I'm not so good at that kind of thing.
That's OK.
I didn't get you a present.
You didn't?!
Would you relax? I'm only joking.
I never celebrate. I saw this cake today and I had to buy it.
I didn't bring it out t0 break your nuts or anything.
Oh, no, I'm not getting nuts.
Well, you should see your face.
I'm not like a lot of people.
My face doesn't have much to do with what I'm feeling.
I wasn't going to bring it out
if I didn't think things were going well and I thought things were going well.
I just remembered.
I have some champagne in the fridge.
It's been in there for a couple of years
but I'm sure we could open it up in a second.
And I have this new tape.
It's a new band but
You'll probably really, really love it.
I'm sure you will.
Because you see, I've got my girlfriend now. She turned me on t0 it.
What I did was recorded it from her CD
'Cause I don't have a CD and
I thought that it would be a really good idea...you could probably...
Anyway, SO. . .50, anyway...
What are you doing?
It's getting really late and...
It's Friday night. What are you talking about?
I'm under a lot of pressure with my publisher.
This is a joke, right? You're so funny.
I have a deadline with my book.
But it was really great getting together after all this time.
And the food was really great.
Yea h, the seafood.
Right, the seafood.
S0 uh...
Don't forget your jacket.
Oh, right.
Anyway uh...
And especially it was great to hear your story and read your book.
Is something going on, Jackie?
I don't know. Is there, Michael?
I don't know. You seem uh...
What is it?
Nothing.
But what?
Nothing.
You sure?
I thought you might want to stay.
Oh, you mean, you mean uh...
Forget it. I shouldn't have said anything.
Oh, no. I didn't...I wasn't trying to...
Let's just forget I said anything, OK?
Why don't you go before I humiliate myself even further?
You haven't humiliated yourself.
Thanks, I feel much better now.
N0, wait, why don't we...OK let's...
Let's talk about it and get it clear.
- Let's get clear and try t0 figure... - Let's let it go. Okay, let's let it go.
We can try...
We'll forget about it in the morning and uh...
You know, I'll see you at work on Monday.
Well, I feel terrible now.
Yeah, well, dates are weird sometimes.
This is a date?
You'd like everyone t0 think
that you don't know what's going on but you know what's going on.
You know very well that I liked you a lot and this was a date.
If I had known that you feel that way...
Don't tell me that you wouldn't have come.
I hope I haven't done anything to mislead you.
You haven't done anything.
I liked you and I'm sorry I liked you.
I'm very flattered that you feel that way about me.
Flattered?! Are you fucking kidding me?
If you don't want t0 get involved, it's your choice, right?
But don't tell me this never happened.
That I got this all wrong, that I made this up.
Don't you tell me that I made this up.
Why don't you just let me try to explain to you.
That's it. Get out.
I just want to tell you... if you just let me try to explain.
Just get the fuck out of here!
Well... Um...
I...
I don't do this.
I said, I don't do this kind of thing anymore.
I didn't quit law school.
I had to leave. I was almost done.
And then
I started t0...
I couldn't get out of bed in the morning and even/body's voices started getting
louder and louder and I felt smaller and smaller.
So, finally I was falling all the time.
See, I carry this briefcase everywhere, you know, writing notes all the time.
And I get home and I put the briefcase on the hall table and I never open it.
See, I don't write.
I haven't written anything in years.
And I don't have a publisher.
You know what I do all the time?
I watch TV.
I get home and I...
I get my dinner and I sit in front of the TV and tell myself it's OK
to watch for a while because I'm lonely.
You know, right after dinner and then
after dinner I get the
TV guide and check and see if s0mething's on
and I watch one program, like a good one, like a science special or something.
But I'll watch what ever's on.
Even if I've seen it before.
'Cause it fills this void in me.
'Cause nobody ever told me what to do.
S0 I watch all night hoping it tells me what to do.
I don't talk about anything I haven't seen on TV.
I didn't read about birds or microwaves.
It's like something broke in me
a long time ago.
I don't know what it was and it's too hard for me to keep trying.
I know a lot of things I want to do with my life.
And I'm so far behind now.
I'm never going to catch up.
I just wish that someone would tell me what to do. That I should sit down,
That I should eat something.
And afterwards
Afterwards though
Answer my questions, tell me how to do stuff
and if i screw up it's okay 'cause
that's what people do. Screwing up's a good thing.
It's good and...
And then they'll tell me to go to bed and go to sleep.
You know, it would be okay tomorrow. We'll do something...
...else and we'll have fun.
I'm sorry.
You know uh...
I lie in bed at night and I'm staring up at the ceiling and it's like
the only thing that's gotten me through lately
is the thought that I'd see you at work.
At first I thought, “oh
Ijust liked you
'cause you know you were so much
fun."
Making jokes at those guys' expense and
and them not knowing it and then
and then
you'd smile and you'd look at me
and I'd understand.
I don't know what happened.
It's like...
At one point, guys just
stopped asking me out.
I don't know if it was because of my age or
because maybe I
I gave off this serious vibe.
It's probably that.
It's funny, you know?
You finally grow up,
you finally figure out who the hell you are,
and just when you've got something interesting to give,
they're not interested anymore.
So, I probably knew you wouldn't come through for me.
I should have known,
When the smartest,
nicest,
funniest guy, who's a paralegal
who does the xeroxing in the office, I should have known that you are
you are where you are
because you want t0 be there.
Because
we all are where we are because
we want to be there, right?
It's getting late.
Right.
I need to sleep.
Yeah, right.
D0 you want to get together again outside of work?
You mean like on a date?
Yeah, I was thinking maybe next Friday.
So this was a date?
Yeah, I'm asking you out on a date next Friday.
After all this?
Uh huh.
Listen, why don't you
why don't you think about it next week and then you can ask me then, OK?
I don't need to wait.
Don't do this to me again.
- I'm just asking you out on a date. -1 don't think so.
You can always change your mind. Any time you want.
You just say the word. I know it's going to be uncomfortable at work but...
Ijust said, ask me next week.
But I was thinking 'cause we've been talking...
Don't.
OK.
S0, I'll see you at work.
See you at work.
What?
I don't know what to do.
What am I going to do now?
Just go home, Michael.
Everything will be okay.
Yeah, right.
I'll see you.
See you.
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