All language subtitles for Fantasy Island S02E13 The Lady and the Longhorn Vampire

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:56,021 --> 00:00:58,555 THE PLANE! THE PLANE! 2 00:01:12,971 --> 00:01:14,649 TATTOO... 3 00:01:14,673 --> 00:01:16,940 TATTOO... TATTOO! 4 00:01:18,143 --> 00:01:20,755 I'M COMING BOSS, I'M COMING. 5 00:01:20,779 --> 00:01:22,223 GOOD MORNING, BOSS. 6 00:01:22,247 --> 00:01:27,462 I AM SORRY TO BE LATE, BUT MY BRITCHES KEEP FALLING DOWN. 7 00:01:27,486 --> 00:01:31,366 MIGHT ONE ASK WHY YOU ARE WEARING THAT RATHER BIZARRE OUTFIT? 8 00:01:31,390 --> 00:01:34,835 OH BOSS, THANKS, MISS VERA TEMPLETON, 9 00:01:34,859 --> 00:01:39,307 THE MILLIONAIRE LADY WHO OWNS MOON MADNESS COSMETICS 10 00:01:39,331 --> 00:01:41,109 IS COMING TO FANTASY ISLAND, RIGHT? 11 00:01:41,133 --> 00:01:42,843 INDEED, SHE IS TATTOO. 12 00:01:42,867 --> 00:01:45,213 AND SHE IS GOING TO FILM A LIPSTICK COMMERCIAL. 13 00:01:45,237 --> 00:01:46,247 SO? 14 00:01:46,271 --> 00:01:49,584 SO MAYBE SHE IS GOING TO NEED A DIRECTOR. 15 00:01:49,608 --> 00:01:54,389 AND WHO IS THE MOST QUALIFIED, TALENTED AND EXPERIENCED FILMMAKER 16 00:01:54,413 --> 00:01:56,924 ON THE ISLAND? 17 00:01:56,948 --> 00:01:59,561 TATTOO, YOU'VE BEEN FANTASIZING AGAIN. 18 00:01:59,585 --> 00:02:02,185 BOSS, DO YOU KNOW A BETTER PLACE TO DO SO? 19 00:02:53,872 --> 00:02:56,005 SMILES EVERYONE, SMILES! 20 00:03:07,852 --> 00:03:09,564 BOSS, HERE SHE COMES, 21 00:03:09,588 --> 00:03:14,969 MISS VERA TEMPLETON OF MOON MADNESS COSMETICS INCORPORATED. 22 00:03:14,993 --> 00:03:18,506 CORRECT MY FRIEND AND THE LITTLE GIRL WITH HER IS HER NIECE, TRACY. 23 00:03:18,530 --> 00:03:20,808 SHE HAS RAISED FROM INFANCY. 24 00:03:20,832 --> 00:03:23,444 THE RATHER PROPER GENTLEMAN IS BENSON, 25 00:03:23,468 --> 00:03:26,147 THE FAMILY BUTLER, CHAUFFEUR, AND MAN OF ALL WORK. 26 00:03:26,171 --> 00:03:28,049 WELL, I THINK I'D DO BETTER TO SEE HER 27 00:03:28,073 --> 00:03:30,351 AND SEE IF SHE NEEDS A DIRECTOR. 28 00:03:30,375 --> 00:03:33,454 TATTOO, IT IS JUST POSSIBLE THAT MISS TEMPLETON MIGHT 29 00:03:33,478 --> 00:03:36,257 FIND USE FOR YOUR TALENTS ON THE SET, 30 00:03:36,281 --> 00:03:38,226 BUT I MUST TELL YOU THAT MAKING THE COMMERCIAL 31 00:03:38,250 --> 00:03:40,662 IS NOT HER PRIMARY PURPOSE FOR BEING HERE. 32 00:03:40,686 --> 00:03:43,030 IT IS NOT? 33 00:03:43,054 --> 00:03:45,300 NO. YOU SEE THE LADY HAS A FANTASY. 34 00:03:45,324 --> 00:03:46,534 SHE DOES? 35 00:03:46,558 --> 00:03:49,804 MRS. TEMPLETON IS ON THE VERGE OF BANKRUPTCY, 36 00:03:49,828 --> 00:03:53,040 IT IS THEREFORE, HER FANTASY TO FIND A HUSBAND WHO IS WEALTHY ENOUGH 37 00:03:53,064 --> 00:03:56,644 TO KEEP HER FROM LOSING HER BUSINESS AND THUS SAVING 38 00:03:56,668 --> 00:04:00,081 WHAT SHE FEELS IS HER NIECES RIGHTFUL INHERITANCE. 39 00:04:00,105 --> 00:04:04,852 BECAUSE SHE IS AH AN IMPULSIVE AND WARM HEARTED LADY, 40 00:04:04,876 --> 00:04:07,455 SHE HAS MADE A GREAT MANY UNWISE INVESTMENTS. 41 00:04:07,479 --> 00:04:11,047 INCLUDING LOANS TO PEOPLE WHO HAD NO INTENTION OF PAYING HER BACK. 42 00:04:12,584 --> 00:04:15,363 BOSS, SHE LOOKS LIKE A VERY NICE LADY, BUT KIND OF CUCKOO 43 00:04:15,387 --> 00:04:18,099 WHERE ARE WE GOING TO FIND A RICH PIGEON TO MARRY HER, 44 00:04:18,123 --> 00:04:21,102 AND HER NIECE, AND HER BUTLER, AND HER DOG. 45 00:04:21,126 --> 00:04:24,193 THAT MY FRIEND, IS MY FANTASY. 46 00:04:26,265 --> 00:04:31,412 BOSS I'VE SEEN THAT MAN BEFORE IT'S LEO DRAKE THE FAMOUS ACTOR. 47 00:04:31,436 --> 00:04:35,883 THAT'S RIGHT. AND THAT PRETTY LADY WITH HIM IS HIS WIFE CARMEN. 48 00:04:35,907 --> 00:04:39,220 UM WHICH ONE OF THEM HAS A FANTASY BOSS? 49 00:04:39,244 --> 00:04:43,391 MR. DRAKE. YOU SEE HE IS WHAT THEY CALL A METHOD ACTOR. 50 00:04:43,415 --> 00:04:46,661 OH I SEE HE LIKES TO BECOME THE PART HE PLAYS, 51 00:04:46,685 --> 00:04:50,898 JUST LIKE SYLVESTER STALLONE OF ROCKY. 52 00:04:50,922 --> 00:04:54,302 PRECISELY TATTOO AND BECAUSE HE IS A METHOD ACTOR 53 00:04:54,326 --> 00:04:59,073 HE HAS COME HERE TO PREPARE FOR HIS NEXT AND MOST CHALLENGING MOVIE ROLE 54 00:04:59,097 --> 00:05:03,944 A PREPARATION THAT COULD PROVE VERY DANGEROUS. 55 00:05:03,968 --> 00:05:07,582 BOSS, WHAT MOVIE IS HE GONNA WORK ON? 56 00:05:07,606 --> 00:05:10,640 A REMAKE OF... DRACULA. 57 00:05:12,611 --> 00:05:17,414 YOU MEAN, LEO DRAKES FANTASY IS TO BECOME A VAMPIRE? 58 00:05:22,854 --> 00:05:27,201 MY DEAR GUESTS I AM MR. ROARKE, YOUR HOST 59 00:05:27,225 --> 00:05:29,158 WELCOME TO FANTASY ISLAND. 60 00:05:45,710 --> 00:05:47,855 HELLO TRACY... BENSON. 61 00:05:47,879 --> 00:05:51,658 HOW IS THE UH MOON MADNESS LIPSTICK COMMERCIAL COMING ALONG? 62 00:05:51,682 --> 00:05:56,330 ITS THE PITS MR. ROARKE, AUNT VERA SHE GOT SOME NEW TEMPEST 63 00:05:56,354 --> 00:05:58,799 TO DIRECT HE COULDN'T DIRECT TRAFFIC IN A ONE WAY TOWN, 64 00:05:58,823 --> 00:06:03,471 WHAT A MEATBALL! AUNT VERA HAS A WEAKNESS FOR YO-YO'S. 65 00:06:03,495 --> 00:06:05,306 STELLA ARE YOU IN THE MOOD? 66 00:06:05,330 --> 00:06:06,407 I THINK SO. 67 00:06:06,431 --> 00:06:08,009 QUIET ON THE SET! 68 00:06:08,033 --> 00:06:12,380 PLEASE I MUST HAVE QUIET TO CREATE THE PROPER MOOD. 69 00:06:12,404 --> 00:06:15,782 GOOD MORN, HOW NICE TOO SEE YOU AGAIN MR. ROARKE. 70 00:06:15,806 --> 00:06:17,651 THANK YOU MISSES TEMPLETON. 71 00:06:17,675 --> 00:06:22,823 YOUR ISLAND IS DIVINE. TOMORROW MORNING I SHALL DASH ON THE BEACH IN THE 72 00:06:22,847 --> 00:06:27,316 NUDE AND THROW SEASHELLS UP TO THE RISING SUN. 73 00:06:28,920 --> 00:06:33,467 AH MONSIEUR TATTOO. ENCHANTE. 74 00:06:33,491 --> 00:06:35,802 HOW NICE TO SEE YOU. 75 00:06:35,826 --> 00:06:39,706 I UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE A VIVID FAN OF THE CINEMA. 76 00:06:39,730 --> 00:06:44,611 I HOPE THAT YOU SHALL GIVE ME AN HONEST CRITIQUE OF MY COMMERCIAL. 77 00:06:44,635 --> 00:06:46,514 EVERYBODY TAKE YOUR PLACES. 78 00:06:46,538 --> 00:06:49,316 MRS. TEMPLETON WILL BE READY FOR THE RUN THRU AT ANY MOMENT. 79 00:06:49,340 --> 00:06:53,087 AAH SIDNEY DARLING! 80 00:06:53,111 --> 00:06:54,088 YES MRS. TEMPLETON. 81 00:06:54,112 --> 00:06:57,858 SIDNEY DARLING CAN WE HAVE A RUN THRU? 82 00:06:57,882 --> 00:07:02,263 RUN THRU, RUN THRU! 83 00:07:02,287 --> 00:07:07,068 IS, YOUR AH AUNT ALWAYS SO AH UM ENERGETIC? 84 00:07:07,092 --> 00:07:12,339 WAIT TILL YOU SEE HER AFTER A COUPLE OF MARTINIS. FLAMES SHOOT OUT OF HER NOSE. 85 00:07:12,363 --> 00:07:14,808 QUIET ON THE SET! QUIET ON THE SET! 86 00:07:14,832 --> 00:07:19,113 I SHALL READ THE COMMERCIAL COPY DURING THE PERFORMANCE. 87 00:07:19,137 --> 00:07:23,784 MUSIC, WIND, 88 00:07:23,808 --> 00:07:25,919 CAMERA, ACTION! 89 00:07:25,943 --> 00:07:30,091 A TROPICAL NIGHT RUNS 90 00:07:30,115 --> 00:07:33,594 THE MADDENING BEAT OF THE DRUMS 91 00:07:33,618 --> 00:07:38,421 AND YOU ARE ALONE. THEN HE IS THERE, 92 00:07:40,525 --> 00:07:43,270 I'M STILL WAITING FOR MY BREEZE 93 00:07:43,294 --> 00:07:47,630 AND THEN YOU KNOW WHAT YOU MUST DO. 94 00:07:50,268 --> 00:07:52,179 WHERE IS MY TROPICAL BREEZE? 95 00:07:52,203 --> 00:07:56,484 I NEED WIND BLOWING THRU MY PALMS AT ONCE. 96 00:07:56,508 --> 00:07:58,608 MOON MADNESS TO THE RESCUE! 97 00:08:01,613 --> 00:08:05,481 WHERE'S MY BREEZE, TURN ON THE MACHINE! TURN IT ON! 98 00:08:07,952 --> 00:08:10,998 AND NOW LONELINESS IS BANISHED 99 00:08:11,022 --> 00:08:14,624 THANKS TO MOON MADNESS EXCITING LIPSTICK. 100 00:08:28,273 --> 00:08:33,008 OH OH! CUT FOR PETE'S SAKES CUT! 101 00:08:35,046 --> 00:08:36,457 I'LL DO BETTER NEXT TIME. 102 00:08:36,481 --> 00:08:41,262 SIDNEY DARLING, IT PAINS ME TO TELL YOU THIS, 103 00:08:41,286 --> 00:08:45,087 BUT YOU ARE TOO IMMATURE TO DIRECT MY COMMERCIAL. 104 00:08:46,558 --> 00:08:50,471 BUT LUCKY I KEPT A POSITION FOR YOU AS A PARKING LOT ATTENDANT. 105 00:08:50,495 --> 00:08:52,640 BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME. 106 00:08:52,664 --> 00:08:53,707 OF COURSE. 107 00:08:53,731 --> 00:08:58,045 UH, OH. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO? 108 00:08:58,069 --> 00:09:01,704 NO DIRECTOR. NOBODY TO DIRECT MY COMMERCIAL AND... 109 00:09:04,242 --> 00:09:06,209 OH MONSIEUR TATTOO. 110 00:09:09,714 --> 00:09:13,060 MONSIEUR TATTOO YOU ARE MY ONLY HOPE. 111 00:09:13,084 --> 00:09:14,728 I AM? 112 00:09:14,752 --> 00:09:19,088 COULD YOU TAKE OVER THE DIRECTION OF MY COMMERCIAL PLEASE? 113 00:09:23,494 --> 00:09:28,509 OF COURSE. FOR YOU I DO ANYTHING. TRUST ME DARLING. 114 00:09:28,533 --> 00:09:30,566 BUT FIRST I'VE GOT TO CHECK WITH MY ACTORS. 115 00:09:33,971 --> 00:09:36,822 TRACY, BENSON WHY DON'T YOU GO AHEAD AND SEE 116 00:09:36,846 --> 00:09:39,786 IF YOU CAN BE OF ANY HELP TO MONSIEUR TATTOO. 117 00:09:39,810 --> 00:09:40,909 OH OKAY. 118 00:09:43,414 --> 00:09:46,594 WELL... HOW DID I DO? 119 00:09:46,618 --> 00:09:48,662 PERFECT MRS. TEMPLETON. 120 00:09:48,686 --> 00:09:51,699 YOU MADE A COMMERCIAL SEEM A VITAL IMPORTANCE TO YOU. 121 00:09:51,723 --> 00:09:56,136 NOBODY WILL EVER SUSPECT IT WAS JUST YOUR COVER STORY 122 00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:58,539 WHILE YOU ARE ACTUALLY HUNTING FOR A RICH HUSBAND. 123 00:09:58,563 --> 00:10:01,808 GOOD, GOOD. YOU SEE NO MAN IS MORE NERVOUS THEN 124 00:10:01,832 --> 00:10:06,113 WHEN HE FINDS OUT THAT THE WOMAN IS ON THE PROWL FOR A MATE. 125 00:10:06,137 --> 00:10:10,384 OH BY THE WAY, WHEN AM I GOING TO MEET MY PROSPECTIVE MATES? 126 00:10:10,408 --> 00:10:13,954 AT A COCKTAIL PARTY I'VE ARRANGED FOR THIS AFTERNOON. 127 00:10:13,978 --> 00:10:16,345 AHA. 128 00:10:22,953 --> 00:10:24,665 MR. AND MRS. DRAKE, 129 00:10:24,689 --> 00:10:28,302 THERE IS ONE THING YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT THE PEOPLE OF THIS VILLAGE, 130 00:10:28,326 --> 00:10:30,738 THEY DON'T CARE MUCH FOR STRANGERS. 131 00:10:30,762 --> 00:10:33,140 THAN YOU'D ADVISE US TO STAY CLOSE TO THE CASTLE? 132 00:10:33,164 --> 00:10:35,676 OH I WOULD, BUT I SHOULD ALSO EXPLAIN THAT 133 00:10:35,700 --> 00:10:40,180 EVEN THOUGH THE CASTLE HAS BEEN VACANT FOR A LONG TIME 134 00:10:40,204 --> 00:10:42,738 IT STILL DOES NOT ENJOY A GOOD REPUTATION. 135 00:10:48,112 --> 00:10:50,457 WHAT DO YOU MEAN MR. ROARKE? 136 00:10:50,481 --> 00:10:54,361 THE PEOPLE OF THE VILLAGE AH BELIEVE THAT THERE IS SOMETHING 137 00:10:54,385 --> 00:10:57,331 EVIL ABOUT THE PLACE, 138 00:10:57,355 --> 00:10:59,221 NO ONE EVER GOES NEAR IT. 139 00:11:15,206 --> 00:11:18,607 AND NOW, ON TO YOUR CASTLE. 140 00:11:34,359 --> 00:11:36,503 GRANDMOTHER IS SOMETHING WRONG? 141 00:11:36,527 --> 00:11:39,272 HE'S COME BACK. JUST AS I KNEW HE WOULD. 142 00:11:39,296 --> 00:11:42,130 - WHO? - HIM. 143 00:11:49,507 --> 00:11:52,986 EVER SINCE WE LEFT THE VILLAGE, I'VE HAD AN UNEASY FEELING. 144 00:11:53,010 --> 00:11:57,758 AND NOW THIS PLACE... IT SCARES ME. 145 00:11:57,782 --> 00:11:59,727 PERHAPS IT THE OLD WORLD AMBIENCE. 146 00:11:59,751 --> 00:12:02,363 THE AREA IS POPULATED BY VERY INTERESTING PEOPLE. 147 00:12:02,387 --> 00:12:05,599 DESCENDANTS OF IMMIGRANTS WHO CAME FROM SOMEWHERE IN ROMANIA 148 00:12:05,623 --> 00:12:07,300 MANY GENERATIONS AGO. 149 00:12:07,324 --> 00:12:10,671 THEY LIVE VERY MUCH AS DID THEIR FORBEARERS. 150 00:12:10,695 --> 00:12:11,905 ROMANIA HUH? 151 00:12:11,929 --> 00:12:15,108 YES WHERE TRANSYLVANIA IS OR WAS. 152 00:12:15,132 --> 00:12:18,545 YES WE KNOW LEO'S ANCESTORS CAME FROM THERE. 153 00:12:18,569 --> 00:12:21,248 WELL, HISTORY IS A LITTLE OBSCURE. 154 00:12:21,272 --> 00:12:26,353 SOME SAY MY ANCESTOR MIGHT HAVE BEEN THE ORIGINAL, COUNT DRACULA. 155 00:12:26,377 --> 00:12:27,388 SO I'VE HEARD. 156 00:12:27,412 --> 00:12:28,844 YES. EXCUSE ME. 157 00:12:36,554 --> 00:12:40,267 OH, ONE MORE THING MR. DRAKE, 158 00:12:40,291 --> 00:12:45,406 I MENTIONED BEFORE THAT THIS CASTLE HAS A SINISTER REPUTATION 159 00:12:45,430 --> 00:12:47,608 AH EVERY TIME I COME HERE, I FELT, 160 00:12:47,632 --> 00:12:51,512 WELL, I WOULDN'T EXACTLY CALL IT FEAR 161 00:12:51,536 --> 00:12:55,682 BUT THERE IS A DEFINITE PRESENCE OF EVIL HERE. 162 00:12:55,706 --> 00:12:57,818 BUT THAT'S GOOD. THAT'S VERY GOOD. 163 00:12:57,842 --> 00:12:59,553 PLEASE BE CAREFUL MR. DRAKE. 164 00:12:59,577 --> 00:13:04,090 DON'T CONFUSE IMAGINATION WITH REALITY. 165 00:13:04,114 --> 00:13:06,348 AND DON'T ALLOW YOURSELF TO BECOME... 166 00:13:10,220 --> 00:13:14,623 POSSESSED? IS THAT THE WORD YOU WERE GOING TO USE? 167 00:13:18,028 --> 00:13:19,873 I MUST BE LEAVING. 168 00:13:19,897 --> 00:13:22,465 I WILL SEE YOU IN TWO DAYS, EXCUSE ME. 169 00:13:32,877 --> 00:13:36,311 HO, HO, OH ATMOSPHERE. 170 00:13:38,983 --> 00:13:42,963 LEO, I HATE TO SAY THIS, I MEAN I KNOW IT'S YOUR FANTASY AND EVERYTHING, 171 00:13:42,987 --> 00:13:46,433 BUT I JUST DON'T LIKE IT. 172 00:13:46,457 --> 00:13:50,303 HONEY, DON'T BE FOOLISH. 173 00:13:50,327 --> 00:13:53,762 WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG? 174 00:14:05,977 --> 00:14:08,388 THE GENTLEMEN WILL REALIZE THAT THIS WHOLE GATHERING 175 00:14:08,412 --> 00:14:11,458 HAS BEEN ARRANGED FOR YOUR BENEFIT MRS. TEMPLETON OF COURSE. 176 00:14:11,482 --> 00:14:12,559 OF COURSE! 177 00:14:12,583 --> 00:14:13,761 SO WHEN YOU ARE READY. 178 00:14:13,785 --> 00:14:16,864 I AM READY FOR THE NUMBER ONE CONTESTANT 179 00:14:16,888 --> 00:14:19,499 OF MY PRINCE CHARMING SWEEPSTAKES. 180 00:14:19,523 --> 00:14:20,756 VERY WELL. 181 00:14:24,729 --> 00:14:28,475 THAT EXOTIC GENTLEMAN IS SHEIK CAMEL HUSIE. 182 00:14:28,499 --> 00:14:31,478 POPULARLY KNOWN AS THE HAWK OF THE DESERT. 183 00:14:31,502 --> 00:14:35,549 MAJORITY STOCK HOLDER OF TRANSGLOBAL PETROLEUM. 184 00:14:35,573 --> 00:14:41,043 SALAAM IAMAFANVEE, I'LL KEEP HIM IN MIND IF I AM DESPERATE. 185 00:14:42,113 --> 00:14:43,113 VERY WELL. 186 00:14:44,682 --> 00:14:48,117 MR. CECIL ENTWISTLE OF ENTWISTLE TOOL AND DIE. 187 00:14:49,987 --> 00:14:51,087 NEXT!! 188 00:14:56,594 --> 00:14:59,539 WELL, I AM AFRAID WE HAVE COME TO THE LAST CANDIDATE. 189 00:14:59,563 --> 00:15:04,600 MR. HOLLIS BUFORD JR. OF H-B PROPERTY ENTERPRISES DALLAS, TEXAS. 190 00:15:05,937 --> 00:15:08,782 ISN'T EXACTLY PRINCE CHARMING IS HE? 191 00:15:08,806 --> 00:15:10,740 BUT THEN BEGGARS CAN'T BE CHOOSERS. 192 00:15:12,043 --> 00:15:14,354 ARE YOU SURE HE IS LOADED? 193 00:15:14,378 --> 00:15:18,992 MR. BUFORD OWNS MORE THAN 500 ACRES OF CHOICE PROPERTIES. 194 00:15:19,016 --> 00:15:24,231 WELL 500 ACRES ISN'T SO MUCH. WHERE ARE THEY? 195 00:15:24,255 --> 00:15:26,934 DOWNTOWN DALLAS! 196 00:15:26,958 --> 00:15:31,105 OOH! EXCUSE ME MR. ROARKE. 197 00:15:31,129 --> 00:15:32,895 BY ALL MEANS, MRS. TEMPLETON. 198 00:15:37,835 --> 00:15:42,082 PARDON ME SIR, I NEED SOME ASSISTANCE. 199 00:15:42,106 --> 00:15:43,516 YOU DO? 200 00:15:43,540 --> 00:15:48,244 COULD YOU ORDER ME A BEVERAGE FROM THE BARTENDER? 201 00:15:50,347 --> 00:15:54,594 I SEEM TO BE PLUM OUT OF GRAPE JUICE. 202 00:15:54,618 --> 00:15:57,865 YOU JUST NAME YOUR POISON MADAM. 203 00:15:57,889 --> 00:16:01,135 I'D BITE THE HEAD OFF A RATTLESNAKE FOR YOU. 204 00:16:01,159 --> 00:16:02,702 YOU WOULD!? 205 00:16:03,795 --> 00:16:05,661 MY WORD. 206 00:16:14,438 --> 00:16:15,983 ERICA ERICA! 207 00:16:16,007 --> 00:16:17,885 ERICA ERICA! 208 00:16:17,909 --> 00:16:21,755 YOUR BUSINESS IS GOOD, BUT YOU LOOK TROUBLED! 209 00:16:21,779 --> 00:16:23,991 TROUBLED? OF COURSE IM TROUBLED! 210 00:16:24,015 --> 00:16:26,927 ALL OF YOU SAW WHAT I SAW TODAY. 211 00:16:26,951 --> 00:16:30,430 WE SAW MR. ROARKE TAKING SOME TOURISTS TO THE CASTLE. 212 00:16:30,454 --> 00:16:34,334 HE IS BACK. I SAW HIM! MAGDA SAW HIM. 213 00:16:34,358 --> 00:16:36,670 YOU ALL SAW HIM, BUT YET YOU ARE AFRAID TO ADMIT IT. 214 00:16:36,694 --> 00:16:39,339 PLEASE ERICA, DO NOT START THAT AGAIN. 215 00:16:39,363 --> 00:16:41,708 YOU ARE FOOLS! ALL OF YOU. 216 00:16:41,732 --> 00:16:44,311 I WARNED YOU THAT THIS DAY WOULD ARRIVE FOR YEARS. 217 00:16:44,335 --> 00:16:46,346 I HAVE PREDICTED IT, AND NOW IT HAS. 218 00:16:46,370 --> 00:16:50,184 HAHA ERICA AND HER PREDICTIONS. 219 00:16:50,208 --> 00:16:52,752 FIRST SHE PREDICTS RAIN AND IT NEVER COMES. 220 00:16:52,776 --> 00:16:56,589 THEN SHE PREDICTS CLEAR WEATHER FOR PLANTING AND IT POURS! 221 00:16:56,613 --> 00:16:59,359 AND NOW SHE PREDICTS VAMPIRE! 222 00:16:59,383 --> 00:17:02,495 I KNOW THE PERSON IN THAT CASTLE IS COUNT DRACULA. 223 00:17:02,519 --> 00:17:04,698 AND HE HAS FOUND US AT LAST. 224 00:17:04,722 --> 00:17:07,500 THE DESCENDANTS OF THOSE WHO FLED TRANSYLVANIA 225 00:17:07,524 --> 00:17:09,992 AND ALL THAT EVIL HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO! 226 00:17:11,495 --> 00:17:12,772 GRANDMOTHER I'M FRIGHTENED. 227 00:17:12,796 --> 00:17:17,466 NO, SHH. I'LL SEE NO HARM COMES TO YOU. 228 00:17:25,376 --> 00:17:26,441 LEO? 229 00:17:28,212 --> 00:17:30,423 LEO! 230 00:17:30,447 --> 00:17:32,392 HERE! 231 00:17:32,416 --> 00:17:34,127 I WAS WONDERING WHERE YOU WERE. 232 00:17:34,151 --> 00:17:35,729 THIS PLACE IS TERRIFIC! 233 00:17:35,753 --> 00:17:38,832 I MEAN THERE ARE SECRET ROOMS AND CORRIDORS, AND BATTLEMENTS. 234 00:17:38,856 --> 00:17:42,236 I'M COLD, THIS PLACE GIVES ME THE CREEPS. 235 00:17:42,260 --> 00:17:43,237 YEAH 236 00:17:43,261 --> 00:17:45,305 WHERE DID YOU GET THAT OUTFIT? 237 00:17:45,329 --> 00:17:47,574 MR. ROARKE. HE DIDN'T FORGET A THING. 238 00:17:47,598 --> 00:17:50,844 HOW ABOUT THIS? SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK? 239 00:17:50,868 --> 00:17:53,480 OH LEO, PLEASE, TAKE THOSE THINGS OFF. 240 00:17:53,504 --> 00:17:55,182 YOU KNOW THIS PLACE HAS A HUGE BASEMENT. 241 00:17:55,206 --> 00:17:56,783 THERE ARE LOTS OF ROOMS AND YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT'S IN ONE OF EM. 242 00:17:56,807 --> 00:17:58,051 - WHAT? - A COFFIN. 243 00:17:58,075 --> 00:17:59,652 - OH. - TRANSYLVANIAN DIRT. 244 00:17:59,676 --> 00:18:03,156 OH, LEO! YOU ARE NOT GONNA GO THAT FAR? 245 00:18:03,180 --> 00:18:08,951 WHAT'S REALLY WEIRD, IS I AM KIND OF, AT HOME HERE. 246 00:18:10,487 --> 00:18:14,601 LIKE ME AND GREAT GREAT GRAND DAD HAD, A LOT IN COMMON. 247 00:18:14,625 --> 00:18:16,425 OH LEO, DON'T SAY THAT. 248 00:18:24,802 --> 00:18:26,335 I'M STARVING. 249 00:18:30,141 --> 00:18:32,786 YOU WOULDN'T WANT YOUR FAVORITE VAMPIRE TO DIE OF MALNUTRITION WILL YOU? 250 00:18:32,810 --> 00:18:34,654 OH THAT'S NOT FUNNY LEO. 251 00:18:34,678 --> 00:18:39,826 EVERYBODY KNOWS THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO KILL DRACULA. 252 00:18:39,850 --> 00:18:44,086 A WOODEN STAKE RIGHT THRU THE HEART. 253 00:18:46,324 --> 00:18:48,004 YOU ARE COLD AREN'T YA. 254 00:18:50,928 --> 00:18:52,539 WHY DON'T YOU GO ON? 255 00:18:52,563 --> 00:18:54,029 I WILL BE DOWN IN A MINUTE. 256 00:19:09,513 --> 00:19:12,459 I AM SURE BUFORD WILL BE RIDING THIS WAY. 257 00:19:12,483 --> 00:19:14,861 AUNT VERA I CAN'T LET YOU DO THIS... 258 00:19:14,885 --> 00:19:18,865 YOU'VE NEVER BEEN ON A HORSE IN YOUR LIFE AND BENSON CAN'T RIDE EITHER. 259 00:19:18,889 --> 00:19:20,233 YOU COULD GET HURT. 260 00:19:20,257 --> 00:19:23,636 NONSENSE DARLING! ANIMALS LOVE ME. 261 00:19:23,660 --> 00:19:27,607 OH BENSON, DO YOU HAVE YOUR CHEW? 262 00:19:27,631 --> 00:19:31,211 IS THIS PART REALLY NECESSARY MRS. T? 263 00:19:31,235 --> 00:19:34,403 OH, BENSON, PLEASE. PLEASE HELP ME IN MY HOUR OF NEED. 264 00:19:39,676 --> 00:19:43,457 OKAY AUNT VERA, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK YOU ARE BANANAS. 265 00:19:43,481 --> 00:19:46,460 HOLLIS BUFORD IS A GIANT NERD! 266 00:19:46,484 --> 00:19:50,919 ALL RIGHT DARLING, COME ON BENSON, LET'S MOUNT UP. 267 00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:04,978 GOOD GRIEF! 268 00:20:05,002 --> 00:20:06,935 HOLD ON MISS T, I AM COMING! 269 00:20:18,782 --> 00:20:19,926 GOOD GRIEF! 270 00:20:19,950 --> 00:20:22,262 YOU ARE DOING THIS ALL WRONG. 271 00:20:22,286 --> 00:20:24,898 BENSON!! 272 00:20:24,922 --> 00:20:27,200 HANG ON MRS. T!! HANG ON!! 273 00:20:35,399 --> 00:20:37,077 ARE YOU SURE THIS IS THE WAY TO DO IT? 274 00:20:37,101 --> 00:20:41,248 CORRECT MRS. T, I'LL GET THIS ANIMAL STRAIGHTENED OUT! 275 00:20:45,642 --> 00:20:46,953 OH! OH! OH! 276 00:20:46,977 --> 00:20:48,710 RIDE EM COWGIRL!! 277 00:20:50,781 --> 00:20:54,649 OH! SLOW DOWN HORSY, WATCH IT! 278 00:21:02,626 --> 00:21:05,905 WHY, SO NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN MR. BUFORD. 279 00:21:05,929 --> 00:21:10,243 LIKEWISE MADAM, IT'S A REAL PLEASURE MEETING UP WITH YOU AGAIN. 280 00:21:10,267 --> 00:21:13,280 ESPECIALLY SEEING AS YOU HUNG IN THERE WITH THAT RUN AWAY. 281 00:21:13,304 --> 00:21:16,649 WHY THANK YOU SIR. THANK YOU SO MUCH! 282 00:21:16,673 --> 00:21:17,784 NOTHING AT ALL. 283 00:21:17,808 --> 00:21:19,852 AUNT VERA! ARE YOU ALRIGHT? 284 00:21:19,876 --> 00:21:22,956 WHY SURE ENOUGH TRACY SUE HONEY. 285 00:21:22,980 --> 00:21:25,858 SAY HOWDY TO MR. BUFORD. 286 00:21:25,882 --> 00:21:27,260 HOWDY. 287 00:21:27,284 --> 00:21:31,631 MR. BUFORD, THIS IS MY NIECE, TRACY SUE TEMPLETON, SIR. 288 00:21:31,655 --> 00:21:33,800 GLAD TO MEET YA. 289 00:21:33,824 --> 00:21:38,905 NOTHING LIKE SEEING A FAMILY THAT RIDES TOGETHER! 290 00:21:38,929 --> 00:21:42,675 OF ALL THE YEARS, ALL OF US TEMPLETONS RIDE. 291 00:21:42,699 --> 00:21:44,366 CARSON TOO! 292 00:21:47,338 --> 00:21:50,071 WOAH! WOAH, AAHH. 293 00:21:53,144 --> 00:21:56,456 THAT'S MY FOREMAN BENSON, 294 00:21:56,480 --> 00:22:00,994 SURE LIKES THEM TRICK RIDING STUNTS. 295 00:22:01,018 --> 00:22:06,566 HOT DANG! YOU REALLY ARE MY KINDA OF FOLKS. 296 00:22:06,590 --> 00:22:11,304 SAY LISTEN, I WAS JUST ABOUT TO CATCH MYSELF SOME NICE FAT JACK RABBITS 297 00:22:11,328 --> 00:22:16,909 OR MAYBE A JUICY IGUANA FOR DINNER ON THE TRAIL. 298 00:22:16,933 --> 00:22:19,679 I'D BE MIGHTY PROUD IF YOU'D CONSENT TO JOIN ME. 299 00:22:19,703 --> 00:22:24,317 WELL I'D BE DELIGHTED, PLUM DELIGHTED!! 300 00:22:24,341 --> 00:22:25,774 DANG!! 301 00:23:51,995 --> 00:23:54,708 LEO, OH THANK GOD YOU ARE BACK. I WAS WORRIED. 302 00:23:54,732 --> 00:23:58,411 WHAT IS IT? WHAT'S WRONG? 303 00:23:58,435 --> 00:23:59,968 I DON'T KNOW... 304 00:24:03,607 --> 00:24:05,507 I AM NOT SURE WHO I AM. 305 00:24:19,823 --> 00:24:21,167 I BET YOU ARE GONNA LIKE THIS. 306 00:24:21,191 --> 00:24:22,624 OH SURE! 307 00:24:26,630 --> 00:24:30,276 OUT ON THE PRAIRIE, WHERE THE SNAKE RIVER BENDS, 308 00:24:30,300 --> 00:24:34,213 A MASKED DESPERADO, WAS SHOT BY HIS FRIENDS, 309 00:24:34,237 --> 00:24:38,084 ONE BULLET FOR VENGEANCE, ONE BULLET FOR SIN 310 00:24:38,108 --> 00:24:41,943 AND AFTER THEY SHOT HIM, THEY SHOT HIM AGAIN. 311 00:24:43,179 --> 00:24:47,115 BANGDIDY BANG BANG BANG BOO. 312 00:24:49,787 --> 00:24:53,933 LISTEN TO HIM, HE SOUNDS LIKE A SHEEP WITH A CRAMP. 313 00:24:53,957 --> 00:24:57,871 OF ALL THE WEIRD BOYFRIENDS AUNT VERA HAS EVER HAD, 314 00:24:57,895 --> 00:25:03,242 HE IS THE LOWEST. BOY AM I GLAD YOU BROUGHT THIS CHICKEN. 315 00:25:03,266 --> 00:25:05,945 IF I EVEN HAD TO LOOK AT THAT GUNK HOLLIS WAS FRYING, 316 00:25:05,969 --> 00:25:07,113 I WOULD'VE FAINTED. 317 00:25:07,137 --> 00:25:09,482 I DON'T REALLY THINK HOLLIS IS SO BAD. 318 00:25:09,506 --> 00:25:11,584 THAT COSSACKS POET YOUR AUNT BROUGHT HOME, 319 00:25:11,608 --> 00:25:14,053 WHO KEPT FILLING THE BATH TUB WITH HOME MADE YOGURT, 320 00:25:14,077 --> 00:25:15,822 HE WAS REALLY ROTTEN NEWS. 321 00:25:15,846 --> 00:25:19,258 I KNOW, AUNT VERA HAS PICKED SOME REAL WINNERS. 322 00:25:19,282 --> 00:25:21,661 BUT WHAT DOES SHE SEE IN A COW KICKER LIKE BUFORD. 323 00:25:21,685 --> 00:25:25,598 BEATS ME. BUT I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING. 324 00:25:25,622 --> 00:25:30,269 ANY MAN WHO GETS THE INTEREST OF YOUR AUNT VERA IS ONE LUCKY SO AND SO. 325 00:25:30,293 --> 00:25:35,875 SHE'S HONEST, SMART, FUNNY AND BEAUTIFUL. SHE... 326 00:25:35,899 --> 00:25:40,713 BENSON, YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH AUNT VERA AREN'T YOU? 327 00:25:40,737 --> 00:25:45,885 WELL I... I GUESS I'VE ALWAYS BEEN IN LOVE, KIND OF. 328 00:25:45,909 --> 00:25:47,809 BUT DON'T TELL HER I SAID SO. 329 00:25:49,813 --> 00:25:52,692 WELL, MAYBE SOME DAY SHE WILL NEED ME FOR SOMETHING MORE 330 00:25:52,716 --> 00:25:56,150 THAN TOTING LUGGAGE OR PAYING THE LIQUOR STORE. 331 00:26:03,226 --> 00:26:04,504 HOW'D YOU LIKE IT? 332 00:26:04,528 --> 00:26:09,943 I LOVE IT, COWBOY! PLAY IT AGAIN. 333 00:26:09,967 --> 00:26:13,613 WELL SURE MADAM. 334 00:26:13,637 --> 00:26:17,484 OUT ON THE PRAIRIE, WHERE THE SNAKE RIVER BENDS, 335 00:26:17,508 --> 00:26:21,387 A MASKED DESPERADO, WAS SHOT BY HIS FRIENDS, 336 00:26:21,411 --> 00:26:25,157 ONE BULLET FOR VENGEANCE, ONE BULLET FOR SIN 337 00:26:25,181 --> 00:26:28,650 THIS CAN GO ON FOR SOME TIME, WE MIGHT AS WELL KEEP BUSY. 338 00:26:29,753 --> 00:26:32,866 I LIKE AN INDUSTRIALIST TODAY. 339 00:26:32,890 --> 00:26:36,870 UNITED MAGNESIUM ALLOY LOOKS LIKE A COMER. 340 00:26:36,894 --> 00:26:40,673 I DON'T KNOW. BEFORE I SELL ANY OF MY MOON MADNESS STOCK, 341 00:26:40,697 --> 00:26:43,543 TO GO FOR THOSE HIGH RISK ISSUES, I'D RATHER LOOK INTO 342 00:26:43,567 --> 00:26:47,413 GOLD MINE STOCK ON THE BIG BOARD. WHAT DO YOU THINK? 343 00:26:47,437 --> 00:26:50,271 HMM, WELL. 344 00:26:55,412 --> 00:26:57,172 ALRIGHT, TAKE ME DOWN PLEASE. 345 00:27:01,151 --> 00:27:03,184 PLACES. PLACES, EVERYBODY PLACES. 346 00:27:06,523 --> 00:27:11,370 ALRIGHT, REMEMBER ON THE MOVIE SET, THE DIRECTOR IS KING. 347 00:27:11,394 --> 00:27:14,674 I WANT TO DO THE SCENE MY WAY. 348 00:27:14,698 --> 00:27:18,110 NOW REMEMBER BE PASSIONATE. 349 00:27:18,134 --> 00:27:20,602 ALRIGHT LET'S DO IT. SOUND. 350 00:27:23,173 --> 00:27:24,405 MUSIC. 351 00:27:25,976 --> 00:27:28,154 LOUDER! 352 00:27:28,178 --> 00:27:29,444 WIND. 353 00:27:31,949 --> 00:27:33,147 CAMERA. 354 00:27:35,919 --> 00:27:37,151 ACTION! 355 00:27:38,889 --> 00:27:43,091 NOW REMEMBER STELLA... THE MAN YOU LOVE IGNORES YOU. 356 00:27:44,294 --> 00:27:48,207 SO YOU PUT ON YOUR MOON SHADOW MADNESS LIPSTICK 357 00:27:48,231 --> 00:27:49,530 AND SUDDENLY HE SEES YOU. 358 00:27:51,534 --> 00:27:54,881 YOU LOVE EACH OTHER BUT YOU RESIST. 359 00:27:54,905 --> 00:27:57,684 BUT THE ATTRACTION IS TOO STRONG. 360 00:27:57,708 --> 00:28:00,675 SUDDENLY, YOU RUN INTO EACH OTHERS ARMS. 361 00:28:04,748 --> 00:28:05,847 RUN! 362 00:28:08,485 --> 00:28:09,718 RUN! 363 00:28:19,129 --> 00:28:21,007 CUT! 364 00:28:21,031 --> 00:28:23,665 TAKE A BREAK, WE DO IT LATER ON. 365 00:28:31,642 --> 00:28:34,186 WOAAAH. 366 00:28:34,210 --> 00:28:35,688 MRS. T MAY I. 367 00:28:35,712 --> 00:28:39,358 YEA YES, WOOPS HAHA. 368 00:28:39,382 --> 00:28:43,062 MISS VERA, YOU'VE MADE ME THE HAPPIEST HOMBRE IN THE WORLD. 369 00:28:43,086 --> 00:28:48,067 I'M PLUM DELIGHTED. BYE SUGAR PUSS. 370 00:28:48,091 --> 00:28:50,091 ADIOS MADAM. 371 00:28:56,700 --> 00:29:02,281 HELP ME BENSON. I THINK I HAVE A BLOWOUT IN MY BODY. 372 00:29:02,305 --> 00:29:07,419 I'VE BEEN OUT ALL MORNING BRANDING COWS. REVOLTING. 373 00:29:07,443 --> 00:29:10,322 WHY DID BUFORD SAY YOU MADE HIM HAPPY, AUNT VERA. 374 00:29:10,346 --> 00:29:15,494 BECAUSE I PROMISED TO MARRY HIM. 375 00:29:15,518 --> 00:29:18,164 ISN'T THAT MARVELOUS? 376 00:29:18,188 --> 00:29:21,034 YOU HAVE TO CALL HIM UNCLE AT ONCE. 377 00:29:21,058 --> 00:29:26,806 THE WEDDING IS TOMORROW. BENSON GET ME TO THE NEAREST SAUNA. 378 00:29:26,830 --> 00:29:29,408 I HAVE GOT A HEADACHE IN MY LEG. 379 00:29:29,432 --> 00:29:30,710 THIS WAY MRS. T. 380 00:29:30,734 --> 00:29:34,413 DON'T FORGET TO CALL HIM UNCLE. 381 00:29:34,437 --> 00:29:39,407 I WON'T EVER CALL HIM UNCLE, I'D RATHER CHEW TOBACCO FIRST!! 382 00:29:52,189 --> 00:29:55,702 I'M SORRY YOU ARE UNHAPPY WITH YOUR AUNTS CHOICE TRACY, 383 00:29:55,726 --> 00:29:58,104 BUT I SUPPOSE FINANCIAL PRESSURES 384 00:29:58,128 --> 00:30:01,540 ARE LIABLE TO AFFECT ANYONE'S JUDGMENT. 385 00:30:01,564 --> 00:30:05,878 WHAT FINANCIAL PRESSURES? AUNT VERA IS MAJORITY STOCK HOLDER 386 00:30:05,902 --> 00:30:10,416 AND SHE'S CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD OF MOON MADNESS, SHE IS LOADED. 387 00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:16,244 I'M SORRY TRACY, PERHAPS I SAID TOO MUCH ALREADY. 388 00:30:18,782 --> 00:30:19,948 I'M SORRY. 389 00:30:28,158 --> 00:30:29,736 MRS. T WILL BE OKAY TRACY. 390 00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:32,426 I'VE GOT THE MASSEUSE WORKING HER OVER IN THE STEAM ROOM. 391 00:30:33,897 --> 00:30:36,209 YOU OKAY, KIDDO? 392 00:30:36,233 --> 00:30:41,814 BENSON LET'S GET OUT THE STOCK HOLDERS FINANCIAL REPORT ON MOON MADNESS. 393 00:30:41,838 --> 00:30:44,884 I THINK AUNTIE VERA HAS BEEN KEEPING SOMETHING FROM US. 394 00:30:44,908 --> 00:30:47,286 HMM, IS THAT SO? 395 00:30:47,310 --> 00:30:48,442 UM HMM. 396 00:30:56,552 --> 00:30:59,265 LEO, PLEASE DON'T GO OUT AGAIN. 397 00:30:59,289 --> 00:31:01,234 LEO, YOU ARE GOING WAY TO FAR WITH THIS. 398 00:31:01,258 --> 00:31:04,036 IT'S LIKE YOU'RE NOT ACTING THE ROLE ANYMORE. 399 00:31:04,060 --> 00:31:08,841 IT'S LIKE YOU'RE ACTUALLY BECOMING COUNT DRACULA! 400 00:31:08,865 --> 00:31:12,633 LEO! LEO!! 401 00:32:07,023 --> 00:32:12,504 PRECIOUS! PRECIOUS, WHY AREN'T YOU IN BEDDY BYE? 402 00:32:12,528 --> 00:32:17,476 I WANT YOU TO BE BEAUTIFUL AND RESTED TOMORROW MORNING FOR AUNTIES WEDDING. 403 00:32:17,500 --> 00:32:19,712 OH IT'S GOING TO BE BEAUTIFUL. 404 00:32:19,736 --> 00:32:23,349 THE PREACHER IS GOING TO STAND IN THE BACK OF CHUCK WAGON. 405 00:32:23,373 --> 00:32:27,653 CUT THE ACT AUNT VERA, I KNOW MOON MADNESS IS IN THE DUMPSTER. 406 00:32:27,677 --> 00:32:30,223 BENSON AND I JUST WENT THRU FIGURES. 407 00:32:30,247 --> 00:32:34,793 OH, THAT'S NOTHING. IT'S JUST A LITTLE PROBLEM IT'S NOTHING. 408 00:32:34,817 --> 00:32:38,797 THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS WILL VOTE YOU OUT AT THE VERY NEXT MEETING. 409 00:32:38,821 --> 00:32:41,868 YOU'LL LOSE THE COMPANY AND EVERY PENNY YOU HAVE. 410 00:32:41,892 --> 00:32:45,204 THAT'S WHY YOU ARE MARRYING THAT RICH CLOD HOPPER, ISN'T IT? 411 00:32:45,228 --> 00:32:50,209 DARLING, IT'S MY FOOLISHNESS THAT GOT MOON MADNESS INTO TROUBLE. 412 00:32:50,233 --> 00:32:53,379 SO IT'S MY RESPONSIBILITY TO GET IT OUT. 413 00:32:53,403 --> 00:32:56,682 YOU SEE IF I LOSE CONTROL OF THE BUSINESS, 414 00:32:56,706 --> 00:33:01,687 400 OF THE MOST TRUSTED EMPLOYEES WILL LOSE THEIR JOBS, 415 00:33:01,711 --> 00:33:04,623 AND I SQUANDERED AWAY YOUR INHERITANCE. 416 00:33:04,647 --> 00:33:09,996 BECAUSE YOU SEE DARLING, I WANT THIS BUSINESS TO BE YOURS ONE DAY. 417 00:33:10,020 --> 00:33:12,331 BECAUSE YOU ARE THE LITTLE GIRL, 418 00:33:12,355 --> 00:33:16,702 I ALWAYS WANTED AND I NEVER HAD. 419 00:33:16,726 --> 00:33:20,106 BUT HOLLIS BUFORD IS SUCH A JERK! 420 00:33:20,130 --> 00:33:25,378 HE'S SUCH A NICE JERK AND I'M GONNA TRY TO MAKE HIM HAPPY. 421 00:33:25,402 --> 00:33:29,382 NOW, COME ON LET US HAVE A NICE SMILE. 422 00:33:29,406 --> 00:33:34,120 COME ON AND LET ME DO WHAT I HAVE TO DO. 423 00:33:34,144 --> 00:33:37,056 WELL, I HAVE THOSE SHARES OF MOON MADNESS YOU GAVE ME 424 00:33:37,080 --> 00:33:40,092 FOR MY BIRTHDAY AND CHRISTMAS AND EVERYTHING! 425 00:33:40,116 --> 00:33:42,061 AND IF WE PUT OUR SHARES TOGETHER 426 00:33:42,085 --> 00:33:45,497 MAYBE WE WILL HAVE ENOUGH VOTES TO KEEP YOU UP ON THE BOARD. 427 00:33:45,521 --> 00:33:48,634 AND BENSON HAS SOME SHARES TOO. 428 00:33:48,658 --> 00:33:51,603 DARLING, I DO LOVE YOU, 429 00:33:51,627 --> 00:33:56,809 AND I REALLY DO APPRECIATE THE OFFER BUT... 430 00:33:56,833 --> 00:33:59,912 YOU SEE, WE HAVE TO BE PRACTICAL. 431 00:33:59,936 --> 00:34:03,950 I HAVE ONLY 30 PERCENT OF THE VOTING SHARES, 432 00:34:03,974 --> 00:34:08,187 AND I NEED ANOTHER 21 PERCENT TO BE IN CONTROL. 433 00:34:08,211 --> 00:34:13,059 WHICH IS THOUSANDS OF THOUSANDS OF SHARES. 434 00:34:13,083 --> 00:34:17,551 BE STRONG MY DARLING, I NEED YOU STRONG. 435 00:34:39,175 --> 00:34:41,920 OH, GOD NO! 436 00:34:41,944 --> 00:34:45,546 MY BABY, MY BABY!! 437 00:35:03,032 --> 00:35:07,379 OH MY CHILD! DID YOU SEE WHAT THE VAMPIRES HAS DONE? 438 00:35:07,403 --> 00:35:11,183 HE HAS KILLED HER! CAN THERE BE ANY DOUBT IN YOUR MIND? 439 00:35:11,207 --> 00:35:13,018 NOW CAN THERE? 440 00:35:13,042 --> 00:35:14,720 STILL WE HAVE NO PROOF. 441 00:35:14,744 --> 00:35:16,521 HOW MUCH PROOF DO YOU WANT? 442 00:35:16,545 --> 00:35:21,560 HOW MANY MORE YOUNG BODIES DO YOU WANT RAVAGED BY THAT MONSTER? 443 00:35:21,584 --> 00:35:23,251 ANSWER ME! 444 00:35:24,921 --> 00:35:28,133 THE VAMPIRE MUST BE DESTROYED OR THERE WILL BE NO PEACE IN OUR VILLAGE. 445 00:35:28,157 --> 00:35:30,135 NOT ONE OF US WILL BE SAFE 446 00:35:30,159 --> 00:35:32,972 OR WE WILL ALL SIT IN OUR HOUSES AT NIGHT WAITING, 447 00:35:32,996 --> 00:35:36,063 JUST WAITING FOR THAT MONSTER TO ATTACK! 448 00:35:37,433 --> 00:35:40,201 WE MUST DESTROY HIM FIRST! 449 00:35:41,337 --> 00:35:45,951 WITH A STAKE THROUGH HIS HEART! 450 00:35:45,975 --> 00:35:48,276 YES!!! 451 00:36:33,122 --> 00:36:34,922 LEO! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? 452 00:36:38,461 --> 00:36:41,307 WHAT HAPPENED? 453 00:36:41,331 --> 00:36:45,411 LEO I KNOW SOMETHING IS WRONG. YOU WERE GONE FOR HOURS. 454 00:36:45,435 --> 00:36:49,337 TRY TO REMEMBER. TRY TO REMEMBER LEO. 455 00:37:02,085 --> 00:37:03,165 THEY ARE COMING FOR ME! 456 00:37:11,894 --> 00:37:14,362 - THEY ARE COMING ME. - LEO! 457 00:37:58,408 --> 00:38:00,352 OPEN THE CASKET! 458 00:38:00,376 --> 00:38:01,575 NOO! 459 00:38:05,248 --> 00:38:08,360 WHERE IS THE COUNT? 460 00:38:08,384 --> 00:38:13,899 THERE IS NO COUNT DRACULA, MY FRIENDS. EXCEPT IN FICTION. 461 00:38:13,923 --> 00:38:18,770 IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT HIS NAME IS! HE IS A VAMPIRE. 462 00:38:18,794 --> 00:38:23,175 THE MAN YOU SEEK IS AN ACTOR, NOT A VAMPIRE. 463 00:38:23,199 --> 00:38:25,177 I DOUBT THAT, YOU'VE NOT SEEN 464 00:38:25,201 --> 00:38:29,314 WHAT HE DID TO HER, YOUR SO CALLED ACTOR! 465 00:38:29,338 --> 00:38:35,154 WE ALL KNOW A GREAT DEAL ABOUT VAMPIRES, DON'T WE? 466 00:38:35,178 --> 00:38:38,623 INCLUDING THE FACT THAT THEY CANNOT SURVIVE, THE LIGHT OF DAY. 467 00:38:38,647 --> 00:38:40,759 ISN'T THAT RIGHT MADAME? 468 00:38:40,783 --> 00:38:43,962 THEY CRUMBLE TO DUST WHEN THE SUN HITS THEM! 469 00:38:43,986 --> 00:38:49,834 THEN ALL WE NEED TO DO, IS FIND THE VAMPIRE AND EXPOSE HIM TO SUNLIGHT. 470 00:38:49,858 --> 00:38:52,337 THE EVIL CREATURE WILL BE NO MORE 471 00:38:52,361 --> 00:38:57,498 AND NONE OF YOU GOOD PEOPLE WILL BE MURDERERS. 472 00:39:01,237 --> 00:39:06,607 THE ROOSTER CROWS. SOON DAYLIGHT WILL BE AMONG US. 473 00:39:09,278 --> 00:39:14,359 MRS. DRAKE DO YOU BELIEVE YOUR HUSBAND IS A VAMPIRE? 474 00:39:14,383 --> 00:39:18,819 CERTAINLY NOT! BUT I'M NOT SURE WHAT HE BELIEVES. 475 00:39:21,624 --> 00:39:23,056 WILL YOU EXCUSE ME PLEASE. 476 00:39:32,868 --> 00:39:35,636 MR. DRAKE, WILL YOU PLEASE FOLLOW ME. 477 00:39:43,179 --> 00:39:45,446 WILL YOU PLEASE STAND THERE. 478 00:40:12,941 --> 00:40:15,254 SO... YOU CAN SEE, 479 00:40:15,278 --> 00:40:17,523 MR. DRAKE IS NOT A VAMPIRE. 480 00:40:17,547 --> 00:40:21,627 HE NEVER WAS. 481 00:40:21,651 --> 00:40:25,096 WHAT ABOUT MAGDA? WHAT ABOUT... 482 00:40:25,120 --> 00:40:27,087 I CAN CLEAR THAT UP ALSO, TATTOO. 483 00:40:40,469 --> 00:40:44,271 YOU SEE, NO TEETH MARKS ON HER PRETTY NECK. 484 00:40:45,575 --> 00:40:47,786 AND YOUR OWN VILLAGE DOCTOR CONFIRMED THAT 485 00:40:47,810 --> 00:40:52,546 THIS YOUNG LADY WAS DRUGGED. SHE IS A BIT SLEEPY I THINK. 486 00:41:01,056 --> 00:41:04,002 ERICA, WHERE IS SHE? 487 00:41:04,026 --> 00:41:07,138 GONE, VANISHED SOMEWHERE. 488 00:41:07,162 --> 00:41:11,543 YOU SEE, SHE KNEW THE GIRL MAGDA WAS UNHARMED. 489 00:41:11,567 --> 00:41:15,380 IN FACT, SHE EVEN PLACED THE PUNCTURE MARKS ON HER NECK HERSELF. 490 00:41:15,404 --> 00:41:17,082 BUT WHY? 491 00:41:17,106 --> 00:41:21,653 TO INSIGHT HER FELLOW VILLAGERS TO MURDER YOU MR. DRAKE, 492 00:41:21,677 --> 00:41:26,146 AND USING THE SECRET OF THAT CRIME TO GAIN POWER OVER THEM. 493 00:41:28,718 --> 00:41:34,533 PRAYING UPON THE UNCONSCIOUS FEARS, THE LATENT SUPERSTITIONS OF OTHERS, 494 00:41:34,557 --> 00:41:38,058 ONLY TO FATTEN HER FEELINGS OF SELF IMPORTANCE. 495 00:41:42,965 --> 00:41:48,168 MR. ROARKE, THANK YOU. YOU ARE QUITE A PERFORMER YOURSELF. 496 00:42:05,521 --> 00:42:08,032 DEARLY BELOVED, AND HOWDY FRIENDS. 497 00:42:08,056 --> 00:42:10,902 I WILL COMMENCE MY SERVICE JUST AS SOON AS THE BRIDE AND GROOM ARRIVE. 498 00:42:10,926 --> 00:42:12,726 AND THAT OUGHT TO BE ANY MOMENT NOW. 499 00:42:14,096 --> 00:42:17,008 I WONDER WHY TRACY AND BENSON AREN'T HERE. 500 00:42:17,032 --> 00:42:19,611 YES. WELL, I'M SURE THEY WILL TURN UP MISS TEMPLETON. 501 00:42:19,635 --> 00:42:21,067 OH I HOPE SO! 502 00:42:23,339 --> 00:42:27,018 BOSS, I WISH THE AREA, I WANNA RE SHOOT MY COMMERCIAL. 503 00:42:27,042 --> 00:42:31,156 YES, HOW THOUGHTLESS OF THEM TO PUT AN UNIMPORTANT THING 504 00:42:31,180 --> 00:42:33,280 LIKE A WEDDING AHEAD OF THAT. 505 00:42:43,225 --> 00:42:45,091 YEE HAW! 506 00:42:46,362 --> 00:42:48,395 THE BRIDE GROOM'S HERE! 507 00:42:49,832 --> 00:42:53,667 JUDGE RANDOLPH, NOW YOU CAN GET ON WITH THE SERIOUS MARRYING. 508 00:42:55,971 --> 00:42:57,371 COME ON HONEY. 509 00:43:00,676 --> 00:43:03,855 NOW THAT THE HOOPIN' AND THE HOLLERING CEREMONIAL IS OVER, 510 00:43:03,879 --> 00:43:06,891 I SHALL PROCEED. 511 00:43:06,915 --> 00:43:11,196 DO YOU VERA GROSNERVE MEREDITH DONE STABLE TEMPLETON LITTLE DARLIN' 512 00:43:11,220 --> 00:43:14,098 TAKE THIS OLD COW HAND AS YOUR LAWFUL WEDDED HUSBAND? 513 00:43:14,122 --> 00:43:15,522 STOP THE WEDDING! 514 00:43:18,026 --> 00:43:21,139 STOP THE WEDDING! STOP THE WEDDING!! 515 00:43:21,163 --> 00:43:22,974 TRACY! TRACY, WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? 516 00:43:22,998 --> 00:43:25,109 I CAN TELL YOU WHAT SHE IS SAYING. 517 00:43:25,133 --> 00:43:27,145 YOU DON'T NEED TO MARRY HIM. 518 00:43:27,169 --> 00:43:31,516 HERE ARE ALL THE SHARES YOU NEED TO RETAIN CONTROL OF BLUE MOON MADNESS. 519 00:43:31,540 --> 00:43:34,386 YOU DON'T NEED BUFFALO BULL TO BAIL YOU OUT. 520 00:43:34,410 --> 00:43:36,054 WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 521 00:43:36,078 --> 00:43:37,756 WELL IT'S REALLY KINDA SIMPLE, 522 00:43:37,780 --> 00:43:40,592 ALL THOSE YEARS TRACY AND I WERE STUDYING THE MARKET AS A HOBBY, 523 00:43:40,616 --> 00:43:42,861 I WAS INVESTING THE SHARES YOU GAVE US 524 00:43:42,885 --> 00:43:45,096 FOR BIRTHDAYS AND BONUSES. 525 00:43:45,120 --> 00:43:48,767 TRACY'S TOO? 526 00:43:48,791 --> 00:43:53,004 I'M AFRAID SO. EVEN TRACY DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT IT UNTIL THIS MORNING. 527 00:43:53,028 --> 00:43:54,740 I JUST GOT OFF THE PHONE WITH OUR BROKER 528 00:43:54,764 --> 00:43:58,443 AND UGH, HERE IS THE CURRENT TALLY. 529 00:43:58,467 --> 00:44:04,148 I HAVE 43,00 SHARES AND BENSON HAS 51,855, 530 00:44:04,172 --> 00:44:08,887 FOR A GRAND TOTAL OF 94,855. 531 00:44:08,911 --> 00:44:11,690 AUNTIE VERA YOU CAN KEEP THE COMPANY! 532 00:44:11,714 --> 00:44:16,528 YAHOOO! OH DON'T TAKE THIS PERSONALLY. 533 00:44:16,552 --> 00:44:22,401 IT JUST SEEMS THAT YOU AND I WILL HAVE TO REMAIN SHIPS THAT PASS IN THE NIGHT. 534 00:44:22,425 --> 00:44:27,093 DANG NABIT. NOW I GOTTA GET ME A DATE FOR THE RODEO! 535 00:44:29,264 --> 00:44:30,542 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 536 00:44:30,566 --> 00:44:33,412 HE'S DOING WHAT I ASKED HIM TO DO AUNT VERA. 537 00:44:33,436 --> 00:44:37,081 IF YOU WANNA KEEP THE COMPANY THERE IS A STRING ATTACHED. 538 00:44:37,105 --> 00:44:42,754 MRS. T. VERA. I LOVE YOU! 539 00:44:42,778 --> 00:44:45,524 I'VE LOVED YOU FOR YEARS. 540 00:44:45,548 --> 00:44:47,459 BUT I'M THRU STANDING IN THE BACKGROUND 541 00:44:47,483 --> 00:44:51,496 WHILE YOU MARRY ANYONE WHO CAN WALK YOU TO THE ALTER. 542 00:44:51,520 --> 00:44:55,956 IF YOU WANT THESE MOON MADNESS SHARES YOU HAVE TO MARRY ME. 543 00:44:58,260 --> 00:45:03,308 I NEVER KNEW YOU COULD BE SO MASTERFUL BENSON. 544 00:45:03,332 --> 00:45:06,812 MAURICE! 545 00:45:06,836 --> 00:45:10,515 MAURICE, MAURICE! 546 00:45:10,539 --> 00:45:13,574 I'D LOVE TO MARRY YOU!! 547 00:45:32,628 --> 00:45:37,075 BYE MR. ROARKE. TATTOO, THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR HELP. 548 00:45:37,099 --> 00:45:39,077 OH, IT WAS A PLEASURE, MRS. DRAKE. 549 00:45:39,101 --> 00:45:42,948 SHOULD YOU REQUIRE ASSISTANCE IN ANY OF YOUR FUTURE ACTING ROLES, 550 00:45:42,972 --> 00:45:45,083 PLEASE FEEL FREE TO RETURN. 551 00:45:45,107 --> 00:45:48,654 THANK YOU, BUT I PREFER HIM REVERSING HIS ROLES 552 00:45:48,678 --> 00:45:51,122 IN A GOOD OLD LIBRARY BACK HOME. 553 00:45:51,146 --> 00:45:55,594 OH, ONE LAST THING MR. DRAKE. 554 00:45:55,618 --> 00:46:01,066 I HAVE YOUR GENEALOGY TRAITS AND IT APPEARS THAT ONE OF YOUR ANCESTORS, 555 00:46:01,090 --> 00:46:04,369 DID INDEED COME FROM TRANSYLVANIA. 556 00:46:04,393 --> 00:46:06,404 WHAT DID I TELL YOU! 557 00:46:06,428 --> 00:46:10,375 HOWEVER, YOUR FORBEAR WAS NOT COUNT DRACULA, 558 00:46:10,399 --> 00:46:13,834 BUT IT WAS THE COUNTS CARETAKER. 559 00:46:17,840 --> 00:46:21,486 WELL, MAYBE IT WASN'T IN MY GENES. 560 00:46:21,510 --> 00:46:24,522 MAYBE IT WAS ALL IMAGINATION. 561 00:46:24,546 --> 00:46:27,626 PERHAPS IT WAS MR. DRAKE. 562 00:46:27,650 --> 00:46:28,860 THANKS GENTLEMAN. 563 00:46:28,884 --> 00:46:30,295 YOU ARE VERY WELCOME MR. DRAKE. 564 00:46:30,319 --> 00:46:31,919 - GOODBYE. - GOODBYE. 565 00:46:53,809 --> 00:46:58,624 WELL, MR. AND MRS. BENSON. AND HOW ARE OUR TWO NEWLYWEDS? 566 00:46:58,648 --> 00:47:02,794 ECSTATIC MR. ROARKE. AND AS FOR YOUR FANTASY, 567 00:47:02,818 --> 00:47:05,998 THERE IS ONLY ONE WORD, FANTASTIC! 568 00:47:06,022 --> 00:47:08,233 I AM SO PLEASED! 569 00:47:08,257 --> 00:47:12,671 BY THE WAY, DO YOU HAVE ANY NEWS OF THE TV COMMERCIAL SCREENING? 570 00:47:12,695 --> 00:47:14,539 AS A MATTER OF FACT, 571 00:47:14,563 --> 00:47:17,909 ALL OF OUR BOARD OF DIRECTORS SAW THE COMMERCIAL THIS MORNING, 572 00:47:17,933 --> 00:47:23,103 AND THEY WANTED ME TO CONVEY TO YOU, OUR UNDYING GRATITUDE. 573 00:47:24,573 --> 00:47:28,854 WELL THEN, AND THEY WANT TO KNOW IF I'M FREE, 574 00:47:28,878 --> 00:47:31,690 TO SHOOT THE NEXT COMMERCIAL? 575 00:47:31,714 --> 00:47:34,425 AS A MATTER OF FACT, NO! 576 00:47:34,449 --> 00:47:36,862 YOU SEE, AFTER THEY SAW THE COMMERCIAL, 577 00:47:36,886 --> 00:47:42,455 THEY DECIDED TO DROP MOON MADNESS LIPSTICK FROM OUR LINE. 578 00:47:51,100 --> 00:47:53,266 GOODBYE MR. BENSON. 579 00:48:00,710 --> 00:48:03,476 GOODBYE AND THANK YOU!! 45244

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