Original subtitles

THE PLANE! THE PLANE!

GOOD MORNING, TATTOO.

GOOD MORNING, BOSS.

WHAT'S THAT?

OH, IT'S A MINI COMPUTER.

MY COUSIN HUGO SENT IT TO ME.

OH, AND HOW DOES THE COMPUTER WORK?

IT'S ME, BOSS. HE FORGOT TO SEND THE INSTRUCTIONS.

BUT I'M SURE IT'S A VERY GOOD.

A COMPUTER CAN SAVE A LOT OF GUESSWORK.

SO CAN BE BIKINIS.

SHALL WE GO AND MEET OUR GUESTS?

SMILES EVERYONE, SMILES.

BOSS, WHO ARE THOSE GORGEOUS LADIES?

MS. GINNY WINTHROP.

MS. AMBER AINSLEY.

AND MS. CLAUDIA HAYES.

WHAT'S THEIR FANTASY?

ONEONE OF DANGER AND EXCITEMENT, TATTOO.

YOU SEE THOSE YOUNG LADIES, ALL OF THEM SECRETARIES FOR A MAJOR INSURANCE COMPANY,

HAVE COME IN HOPES OF BEING ABLE TO LIVE AN

ADVENTURE LIKE THEIR FAVORITE TELEVISION HEROINES.

CHARLIE'S ANGELS.

CHARLIE'S ANGELS!

YES.

BOSS, MY FANTASY HAS ALWAYS BEEN TO BE BOSLEY.

INDEED.

PERHAPS THIS WEEKEND, A NUMBER OF FANTASIES CAN COME TRUE.

BOSS, YOU REALLY MEAN THAT?

THE 4 GENTLEMEN THAT ARE EMBARKING NOW,

ARE ALL VETERANS OF WORLD WAR II.

WHO WHILE INCARCERATED IN THE GERMAN PRISON CAMP STALAG 3,

RAN A NETWORK OF ESCAPE ROUTES FOR THE OTHER PRISONERS.

THAT SOUNDS VERY DANGEROUS.

OH INDEED, IT WAS.

THEIR LAST BIG ESCAPE, WAS THEIR OWN.

IT WAS SAID THAT THE COMMANDANT OF STALAG 3 NEVER RECOVERED

FROM THE DISGRACE AND MORTIFICATION HE SUFFERED BECAUSE OF THOSE FOUR.

THEY ARE ALL VERY WEALTHY NOW EXCEPT DANNY RYAN.

THE OTHER THREE AFFECTIONATELY CALL HIM,

DARING DANNY, THE GREATEST GUY WE EVER KNEW.

HE SAVED HIS FRIENDS LIVES WHEN THEY ESCAPED FROM STALAG 3.

WHOSE FANTASY IS THIS, BOSS?

MR. RYAN'S.

HE WANTS TO RELIVE THE GOOD OLD DAYS OF WORLD WAR II AGAIN.

BUT THERE IS MORE TO IT THAN THAT.

IS THAT WHAT YOU MEAN, BOSS?

WERE GOING TO GIVE HIM THAT, TATTOO. AND MUCH MORE.

MY DEAR GUESTS, I AM MR. ROARKE, YOUR HOST.

WELCOME TO FANTASY ISLAND!

YOUR FANTASY WAS TO RETURN TO THE VILLAGE OF BOUGIVAL,

WELL MY FRIENDS, WELCOME TO BOUGIVAL.

INCREDIBLE, I MEAN, JUST LIKE IT WAS IN 1944.

EVEN THE CHEZ FIFI.

WHERE WE SPENT THOSE 30 MISERABLE NIGHTS IN THAT DARK CELLAR AFTER OUR ESCAPE.

TELL ME MR. ROARKE, HOW DID YOU DO ALL OF THIS?

WELL, IT SO HAPPENS THAT THE VILLAGE OF BOUGIVAL WAS SCHEDULED FOR DEMOLITION

TO MAKE WAY FOR AN AIRPORT.

IT WAS IMPORTED HERE... STONE BY STONE.

FAR OUT.

AH, I DON'T SUPPOSE ANY OF THE... SAME PEOPLE...

WHAT DANNY IS TRYING TO SAY, IS THAT...

CHEZ FIFI USED TO BE RUN BY A VERY SPECIAL LADY.

OH.

FIFI APREA.

SHE WOULDN'T STILL BE AROUND, WOULD SHE MR. ROARKE?

WHY NOT SEE FOR YOURSELF, MR. RYAN.

LET'S GO.

HEY, LOOK AT THIS!

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

OH, DANNY!

FIFI!

AH, MON CHER. YOU HAVE COME BACK.

OH LA, LA, LA, LA, LA.

FIFI!

FIFI.

YOU HAVE ALL COME BACK.

FIFI, THE YEARS HAVE HARDLY TOUCHED YOU.

IT'S VERY KIND OF YOU TO SAY SO.

BUT YOU ALWAYS WERE AN OUTRAGEOUS FLATTERER.

FIFI, THOSE CAN-CAN GIRLS ARE REALLY GORGEOUS.

DOESN'T FIFI ALWAYS HAVE THE MOST GORGEOUS GIRLS?

WHY DON'T WE ALL JOIN THEM.

WHY DON'T WE?

YEAH-HO!

LET'S GO!

HEY!

I TOLD YOU GUYS TO TRUST ROARKE.

HE NEVER FORGETS ANYTHING.

I... I DON'T QUITE KNOW HOW TO SAY THIS, BECAUSE...

NOTHING LIKE IT HAS EVER HAPPENED IN THE PAST.

I'M AFRAID I FIND IT NECESSARY TO CANCEL YOUR FANTASY.

MR. ROARKE!

YOU PROMISED WE COULD HAVE AN ADVENTURE LIKE CHARLIE'S ANGELS.

YES, I KNOW.

WHAT HAPPENED THAT'S SO TRAGIC MR. ROARKE?

IRONICALLY ENOUGH, A ROBBERY.

WELL OVER A HALF $1 MILLION WERE STOLEN.

WHOEVER PERPETRATED THIS CRIME, PLAYS FOR

HIGH STAKES AND COULD BE EXTREMELY DANGEROUS.

BUT MR. ROARKE, THAT IS OUR FANTASY!

YOU PROMISED US WE COULD HANDLE A CAPER.

YES, BUT I HAD SOMETHING ELSE IN MIND FOR YOU LADIES.

SOMETHING FAR LESS PERILOUS.

NOW I SIMPLY CANNOT PLACE THREE OF MY GUESTS IN JEOPARDY, I CAN'T.

MR. ROARKE, WE INSIST.

SORRY, IT'S OUT OF THE QUESTION.

- UNLESS... - UNLESS WHAT?

UNLESS MY ASSISTANT TATTOO, HERE WERE WILLING TO WORK WITH YOU.

WITH HIM AT YOUR SIDE, I WOULDN'T BE UNDULY CONCERNED ABOUT YOUR SAFETY.

DON'T WORRY, BOSS, I WILL LET NOTHING HAPPEN TO THEM. NOTHING.

IT IS AGREED THEN.

I SUGGEST THAT YOU LADIES ADOPT

ADEQUATE COVERS BEFORE YOU'RE INTRODUCED TO LIZZIE CLARK.

WHO IS USING OUR FACILITIES HERE, AS HEADQUARTERS

FOR HER SENSITIVITY TRAINING PROGRAM.

AND PLEASE, DO BE CAREFUL IN THE MEANTIME.

WOULD YOU?

HI. SHORT, DARK AND HANDSOME.

GIVE ME A KISS.

LIZ, THIS IS AMBER, CLAUDIA AND GINNY.

HOW DO YOU DO? MR. ROARKE, TOLD ME YOU WERE COMING.

I HOPE YOU CAN HELP OUT.

OH YEAH.

WE'RE SURE GONNA TAKE A RUN AT IT.

ACCORDING TO MR. ROARKE, YOU'RE KEEPING THE ROBBERY A SECRET.

AS LONG AS I CAN GET AWAY WITH IT. ONE WORD LEAKS OUT, AND MY BUSINESS CAN BE RUINED.

MAYBE WE CAN FIND THE MISSING LOOT BEFORE THAT HAPPENS.

ANY SUSPECTS?

WHOEVER DID IT, IS STILL HERE.

THERE WERE NO CHECK OUTS SINCE LAST NIGHT.

THE STOLEN HALF MILLION-DOLLAR BROOCH,

BELONGS TO THE ONE AT THE BAR.

AND HER HUSBAND IS PAUL, THE BOY WONER OF REAL ESTATE.

ANY QUESTIONS?

NO, I'VE GOT IT.

ALRIGHT, HERE'S A SCHEDULE OF THE CLASSES AND THE MEALS.

AND YOU CAN TELL THE TIMES. YOU'LL LOVE IT.

IT SOUNDS LIKE FUN.

IT WILL BE, YOU WON'T REGRET IT.

SEE, THIS IS ONE OF THE REASONS FOR THE REUNION.

IT'S A CAN'T MISS PROPOSITION.

THE 4 OF US PUT UP THE CASH, WE ALL GO IN TOGETHER.

HEY, THERE'S ME DARLIN'.

- THINK ABOUT WHAT I SAID. - OH, ABSOLUTELY.

I CAN'T GET OVER THIS! EVERYTHING EXACTLY AS IT WAS IN 1944.

EVEN DANNY IS TRYING TO COOK UP A DEAL.

AND HE STILL OWES US FROM THE LAST ONE.

IF EVERYTHING WERE THE SAME, WE'D PROBABLY

BE HEARING THE CLANK OF TANKS, ANY DAY NOW.

DID YOU SAY ANY DAY NOW?

THAT SOUNDS LIKE A TANK, ALRIGHT.

HEY, DANNY!

THIS IS A TERRIFIC FANTASY YOU'VE DREAMED UP, BUT HOW FAR DOES IT GO?

SURELY, YOU DID NOT LOOK TO RE-CREATE WORLD WAR II OLD BOY.

EVERYONE STAND STILL, DO NOT MOVE!

- VON STERN. - COLONEL HORST VON STERN.

COMMANDANT OF STALAG 3.

I THINK YOU REMEMBER ME WELL.

WE REMEMBER YOU, ALRIGHT.

BUT THE WAR IS OVER, OLD BOY.

YOUR SIDE LOST.

VON STERN FORGETS THOSE MINOR DETAILS.

BUT WHAT I DO REMEMBER VERY WELL IS THE HUMILIATION THAT I SUFFERED AT YOUR HANDS.

DANNY, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?

YOU THINK COMMANDANTS HAVE NO FANTASIES?

THIS IS MINE!

YOU ARE MY PRISONERS.

THIS IS RIDICULOUS!

AND IT'S GONE FAR ENOUGH.

TAKE THEM AWAY.

WHAT'S THAT?

OH, THAT'S A COMPUTER. VERY COMPLICATED.

YOU KNOW, LIFE IS VERY COMPLICATED.

THAT'S WHY I CAME HERE.

TO UNCOMPLICATE MY LIFE.

UGH! STUPID MACHINE.

SO, YOU'RE A FREELANCE MAGAZINE WRITER.

YES MA'AM. I'M DOING A PIECE ON MISS CLARKE'S SENSITIVITY TRAINING TECHNIQUES.

OH, SO THAT'S WHY YOU ASK SO MANY QUESTIONS.

BEING A PHOTOGRAPHER'S MODEL IS LIKE ANYTHING ELSE,

IT'S GOT ITS GOOD AND ITS BAD POINTS, BUT IT'S A GOOD LIVING.

SO DOES INTERIOR DESIGN.

BUT I GET SO BORED.

WHAT ABOUT YOU, MR. MATTHEWS? WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?

I SELL ICE BOXES TO ESKIMOS. ANYTHING ELSE?

YES, WHY SO HOSTILE?

BECAUSE I DON'T ENJOY BEING GRILLED LIKE SOME PENNY ANTE CROOK.

WELL, I WONDER WHAT CHARLIE'S ANGELS WOULD BE DOING RIGHT ABOUT NOW.

HMM... UNLESS I MISSED MY GUESS, THEY'D BE

CHECKING OUT THE MYSTERIOUS JOE MATTHEWS...

VERY CAREFULLY.

STARTING OUT WITH HIS BUNGALOW, RIGHT?

OPEN THE GATE!

I'M ALL FOR DEJA VU, BUT THIS IS A TOUCH MORE THAN I EVER CONJURED ON.

I DON'T BELIEVE THIS.

SILENCE!

TALK IS REVOLTING.

AS YOU CAN SEE, THERE ARE FOUR GRAVES...

AND THERE ARE 1, 2, 3, 4 OF YOU.

LOOK, HE'S CRAZY.

HE ALWAYS WAS PSYCHO.

THIS TIME THERE WILL BE NO ATTEMPTED ESCAPE FROM STALAG 3.

DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?

YA VOL, COLONEL, YA VOL.

THERE WILL BE NO MORE ESCAPE ATTEMPTS FROM STALAG 3.

TAKE THOSE PRISONERS TO THE BARRACKS.

HE CAME HERE FOR SENSITIVITY TRAINING, SO THAT'S WHAT YOU GET.

NOW WERE GOING TO START OUT BY EXPERIENCING HUMAN CONTACT IN ITS MOST PRIMITIVE FORM.

I JUST LOVE DOING THIS.

DO YOU LOVE DOING THIS?

IF YOU DO, I DO.

ALRIGHT, NOW THAT WE ARE ALL COMFORTABLE,

WE'RE GOING TO TAKE TURNS TOUCHING EACH OTHER.

YOU HEARD ME, TOUCHING.

REACH ACROSS AND TOUCH YOUR PARTNER'S HAND.

OKAY. NOW TOUCH AND FEEL.

TOUCH AND FEEL.

EXCUSE ME.

ARE YOU SURE THIS IS JOE MATTHEWS BUNGALOW?

POSITIVE.

THERE IS NOTHING IN HERE.

OKAY, IF I CRACKED A SAFE,

WHERE WOULD I STASH THE LOOT?

REMEMBER THAT CHARLIE'S ANGELS EPISODE

WHERE SABRINA GOT INVOLVED WITH THE POLE VAULTER?

OH YEAH, WHERE HE STOLE THE NECKLACE, AND HID IT IN THE FRIDGE?

RIGHT.

I GOT A BETTER IDEA.

COME ON BABY.

PAY DIRT!

THESE HAD TO COME FROM LIZZIE'S SAFE.

LOOK, THIS ONE BELONGS TO DICK STANTON.

STILL GOT THE CASH IN EM.

CHICKEN FEED.

I WANT TO KNOW WHERE THE VALUABLE ITEMS ARE.

LIKE THE HALF MILLION DOLLAR BROOCH.

HEY AMBER, WHAT'S THAT?

I'VE SEEN ONE OF THESE BEFORE IN MY POLI-SCIENCE CLASS.

IT'S AN M-206 SUPERCAM SCANNING DEVICE.

WHAT DO YOU DO WITH IT?

IT'S THE MOST SOPHISTICATED DEVICE GOING FOR OPENING SAFES.

IT TAKES AN ELECTRONIC GENIUS TO KNOW HOW TO WORK THIS THING.

ALRIGHT LADIES, TURN AROUND AND FACE THIS WAY.

COME ON, GET BACK IN THE ROOM.

PUT THAT DOWN.

PUT IT DOWN, GO ON, GET BACK!

WHO WANTS TO EXPLAIN WHAT'S GOING ON?

NOBODY!

ALRIGHT, LIKE I SAID, WHAT'S GOING ON HERE NOW?

WE JUST DISCOVERED WHERE YOU STASHED PART OF

THE LOOT AFTER RIPPING OFF LIZ CLARK'S SAFE.

ARE YOU SAYING SOMEBODY KNOCKED OFF LIZZIE'S SAFE?

BECAUSE IF YOU ARE, I'M IN A LOT OF TROUBLE.

YOU BETTER BELIEVE YOU'RE IN TROUBLE.

SAFE CRACKING.

THAT USED TO BE MY RACKET, BUT I'M RETIRED NOW.

ANY PARTICULAR REASON WHY WE SHOULD BELIEVE YOU?

YEAH...

YEAH, BECAUSE THIS WHOLE THING IS TOO PAT.

LIKE MY TRIP TO THIS ISLAND. I DIDN'T PAY FOR IT.

IT WAS ALL EXPENSE PAID VACATION, SENT TO ME BY ANONYMOUS.

AND NOW I AM BETTING IT'S THAT SAME ANONYMOUS THAT BUSTED LIZZIE'S SAFE,

FRAMED ME WITH ALL THIS JUNK, AND THEN TOOK OFF WITH THE HEAVY STUFF.

REASONABLE?

IT WON'T WASH, MATTHEWS.

GOD AS MY WITNESS.

STOP NAME DROPPING.

ALRIGHT, NOBODY GETS CRAZY HERE.

AND NOBODY LEAVES THIS CABIN FOR FIVE MINUTES, ALRIGHT?

GOT IT, FIVE MINUTES.

WELL, WE CERTAINLY HANDLED THAT SUSPECT.

YEAH, WE BETTER CHECK IN WITH BOSLEY.

YOU MEAN TATTOO.

I DON'T THINK MR. MATTHEWS CRACKED THE SAFE.

WHAT MAKES YOU SAY THAT?

ACCORDING TO HIS POLICE RECORD, HE'S MORE A PROWLER...

I COULDN'T FIND ANY SCRATCH ON THE SET.

BUT LIKE I TOLD YOU, WE FOUND THE M-206 SCANNER THAT HE USED TO OPEN IT.

CRIMINALS RARELY CHANGE THEIR M.O, THAT'S A FACT.

CHARLIE'S ALWAYS TELLING THAT TO THE ANGELS.

IF MATTHEWS IS TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT NOT BEING GUILTY,

SOMEBODY COULD HAVE PLANTED THAT M-206 AS EVIDENCED TO FRAME HIM.

OR MATTHEWS CAN HAVE AN ACCOMPLICE,

SOMEONE WHO IS AN EXPERT IN ELECTRONICS.

THAT'S A POSSIBILITY.

I BETTER CALL CHARLIE... I MEAN, MR. ROARKE.

WHAT DO YOU SUPPOSE VON STERN WANTS US FOR?

WHO KNOWS, REVENGE?

WE SURE MADE A KLUTZ OUT OF HIM IN 1944.

DANNY IS RIGHT. UP UNTIL THEN, HE WAS A HIGH MUCKETY-MUCK WITH THE NAZIS.

YEAH.

IN CHARGE OF OFFICIAL LOOTING IN THE AREA.

PAINTINGS, GOLD, JEWELRY.

ANYTHING THEY CAN GET THEIR CRUMMY HANDS ON.

I REMEMBER READING SOMEWHERE THAT HE AND A BUNCH OF OTHER EX-WAR CRIMINALS

WERE LIVING IN SOUTH AMERICA.

TRYING TO RAISE FUNDS FOR A FOURTH REICH.

LT. EDWARD HODGES.

MR. HODGES, IF YOU DON'T MIND.

IT'S ONE THING FOR VON STERN TO THE BALMY,

BUT HOW DID HE PERSUADE THOSE YOUNG MEN TO COME WITH THEM.

MAYBE HE PROMISED THEM THAT THIS TIME AROUND, THEY'D WIN THE WAR.

THINK OF 1944.

ARE YOU THE ONE WHO CREPT INTO MY ROOM WHILE I SLEPT,

AND STOLE MY SYMBOL OF AUTHORITY?

I HAVEN'T THE SLIGHTEST IDEA OF WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

A RIDING CROP, SIMILAR TO THIS ONE.

WHO WOULD WANT TO STEAL THAT?

YOU AND YOUR MEN DUG TUNNELS, SOME TO THE SOUTH AND SOME TO THE NORTH.

AND WHILE WE WAITED FOR HOURS, PATIENTLY FOR THE PRISONERS TO CRAWL OUT,

THEY ESCAPED TO THE EAST.

DECEPTION.

WE WERE DECEIVED, AND THEY ESCAPED.

MR. GARNER, WHAT KIND OF DECEPTION WAS USED WHEN YOU STOLE MY RIDING CROP?

AND WHERE IS IT NOW?

I AM WARNING YOU, I'M AT THE END OF MY PATIENCE.

EITHER YOU RETURN MY RIDING CROP, OR YOUR LIFE IS AT AN END.

I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU FOR TWO HOURS, I DON'T

KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR STUPID RIDING CROP.

SO, YOU REFUSE TO TELL ME.

DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND, YOU WILL ALL DIE?

HERR COMMANDANT, WHY DON'T YOU TAKE TWO ASPIRIN AND CALL ME IN THE MORNING.

CAPTAIN RYAN,

EITHER YOU WILL TALK

OR THE FOUR OF YOU WILL OCCUPY THE FOUR GRAVES.

AND THAT IS A PROMISE.

OH, MR. ROARKE.

MISS AINSLEY.

WHY ARE YOU HERE?

IS THERE A PROBLEM, IS SOMETHING WRONG?

GOOD EVENING, LADIES.

GOOD EVENING.

TATTOO...

IN ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION MISS AINSLIE, I

HAVE COME HERE OUT OF CONCERN FOR YOUR SAFETY.

YES, YES.

YOU SEE, TATTOO PHONED ME ABOUT YOUR ENCOUNTER WITH MR. MATTHEWS...

FIGHTING FOR A GUN?

ONE OR MORE OF YOU COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED.

I THOUGHT WE HANDLED OURSELVES PRETTY WELL.

I'M SORRY, I'M AFRAID IT IS AS I SAID IN THE BEGINNING.

THIS FANTASY IS TOO DANGEROUS FOR NEOPHYTES.

FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY, I STRONGLY URGE THAT YOU GIVE UP THIS INVESTIGATION.

I'M SORRY MR. ROARKE, WE CAN'T QUIT NOW.

AMBER IS RIGHT.

- WE'RE COMMITTED. - SO ARE YOU, MR. ROARKE.

YOU SAID THIS WAS OUR CAPER.

AND IT IS, AND WE'RE GOING ALL THE WAY.

I SEE.

THIS IS YOUR FINAL DECISION?

FINAL AND IRREVOCABLE.

TATTOO...

I STICK WITH THEM, BOSS.

HEIL HITLER.

MANNY, MON CHER...

I THOUGHT YOU WERE A PRISONER?

WHEN WAS I EVER A PRISONER, ANY PLACE, ANY TIME... FOR VERY LONG?

DURING THOSE DAYS WHEN YOU LET US HIDE IN YOUR

CELLAR, I GAVE YOU SOMETHING TO KEEP FOR ME.

THERE WAS SO MUCH GOING ON IN THOSE DAYS.

A RIDING CROP.

THE COMMANDANT'S BLACK RIDING CROP.

YOU REMEMBER, DON'T YOU?

NO.

I USED TO PARADE UP AND DOWN WITH IT, REMEMBER?

OUI, I REMEMBER NOW.

I WAS STILL AFRAID OF THE GERMANS.

SO I HID IT.

- IN THE CELLAR. - IN THE CELLAR?

WELL WAIT...

IF MR. ROARKE HAD THE WHOLE VILLAGE MOVED,

STONE BY STONE, BUILDING BY BUILDING,

EVERYTHING PRACTICALLY INTACT.

IT COULD STILL BE THERE IN THE CELLAR.

ANYWAY, THERE'S A CHANCE.

IF YOU WANT TO LIVE, YOU WILL REMAIN QUIET AND DO AS THE GENTLEMAN SAYS.

WELL?

AHH!

VOILA!

THIS IS IT.

THIS IS IT, THIS IS IT!

QU'EST-CE QUE...

AH, HERE WE GO.

LOOK AT IT, FIFI. DIAMONDS.

LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THOSE DIAMONDS.

OH, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA-LA, LA.

OH, LA, LA, LA, LA.

THIS IS WHAT VON STERN RISKED HIS LIFE TO COME BACK FOR...

THOSE WERE MINE... A TWO-BIT RIDING CROP,

WITH A FORTUNE HIDDEN INSIDE.

AND IT'S ALL OURS. ALL WE'LL EVER NEED FOREVER.

COME ON, LETS GET OUT OF HERE WHILE IT'S STILL DARK, BEFORE THEY MISS HIM.

YOU MEAN BACK TO STALAG 3?

ARE YOU KIDDING? BACK TO THE STATES!

BUT WHAT ABOUT FOX?

AND GARNER, HODGES?

WE'LL SEND HELP FOR THEM WHEN WE GET BACK TO ROARKE.

OH, DANNY. YOU WOULD NOT DESERT YOUR COMRADES.

I'M NOT DESERTING THEM, BABY.

WHAT CAN I DO IF I WENT BACK? I CAN NEVER GET OUT AGAIN.

THIS WAY, THERE'S A CHANCE TO GET THE OTHERS OUT, EVEN BUY THEIR FREEDOM.

BUT VON STERN IS CRAZY.

WHEN HE FINDS OUT YOU ARE GONE, HE MIGHT KILL THEM.

NO, VON STERN? SHHH...

HE'LL HOLD THEM FOR HOSTAGE, TO BARGAIN WITH.

BUT YOU CAN'T BE SURE OF THAT, CAN YOU?

LOOK, FIFI...

IF I GO BACK, I'LL LOSE EVERYTHING.

MY ONE BIG BREAK.

I'M 54 YEARS OLD, I HAVEN'T GOT TWO NICKELS TO RUB TOGETHER.

WHY DO YOU THINK I CAME ON THIS FANTASY?

I WAS HOPING TO RAISE MONEY FROM THEM.

FOR A DEAL.

THOSE GUYS, I MEAN... THEY LIVE HIGH ON THE HOG.

FAT CATS.

ME, THIS IS MY ONE CHANCE.

BUT THEY'RE YOUR FRIENDS.

THEY RELY ON YOU.

THEY'VE GOT NO RIGHT TO!

I COULDN'T GET US ALL OUT.

BUT YOU CAN.

YOU WILL FIND A WAY, ONLY YOU CAN.

WHY DO YOU THINK THEY CAME WITH YOU, ON YOUR FANTASY?

I DON'T KNOW. TO GET AWAY FROM THE RAT RACE FOR A FEW DAYS, WHATEVER!

NO, DANNY.

THEY CAME BECAUSE OF YOU.

ME?

YOU ARE A VANISHING BREED, DANNY RYAN.

YOU ARE WHAT EVERY MAN DREAMS OF BEING.

YOU ARE A HERO.

TATTOO, I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU. COME, WE HAVE TO TALK.

OHH, AH.

WHAT'S GOING ON, LIZZIE?

DOOMSDAY.

MR. AND MRS. STENTON HAVE DECIDED TO THROW A PARTY FOR ALL THE GUESTS TONIGHT...

FORMAL.

SO?

SO, THEY'LL ALL WANT THEIR VALUABLES FROM MY SAFE TO WEAR TO THE PARTY.

RIGHT, AND YOU CAN'T PRODUCE THEM.

TRUST US.

RIGHT, GIRLS?

RIGHT, TRUST US.

WHY SHOULD SHE TRUST US?

BECAUSE...

BECAUSE WE'RE GOING TO RETURN EVERY MISSING ITEM FROM YOUR SAFE,

NO LATER THAN 5 P.M. TODAY.

OH, THANKS KIDS. THANKS A MILLION.

HALF A MILLION.

HOW ARE WE GOING TO DO THAT?

UH HUH...

I DON'T HAVE A CLUE.

BUT LET'S WORRY ABOUT IT OVER BREAKFAST.

I'M STARVED.

HELLO.

A TABLE FOR FOUR PLEASE.

YOO-HOO!

THANK YOU, VERY MUCH.

WE SAVED SOME SEATS FOR YOU, WON'T YOU JOIN US?

- YES. - GOOD MORNING.

- GOOD MORNING. - GOOD MORNING.

I UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE THROWING A PARTY TONIGHT.

YES, I DO HOPE THAT YOU CAN ALL COME.

NO REASON WHY WE CAN'T.

I HAD TO TALK TO DICK INTO IT.

HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND A WOMAN'S NEED TO GET ALL DOLLED UP.

IF I HAD A BROOCH LIKE YOURS, I'D GO FORMAL ALL THE TIME.

OH, YOU'VE SEEN MY BROOCH?

UH, NO, NO, WORD-OF-MOUTH.

STUPID MACHINE.

SAY THAT'S A REAL BEAUTY, MIND IF I HAVE A LOOK AT IT?

NO THAT'S OKAY, BUT I WARN YOU, IT'S A VERY COMPLEX.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

OH, JUST A SIMPLE CALCULUS PROBLEM.

IT DOES CALCULUS?

CALCULUS, ALGEBRA, GEOMETRY.

TRIG, IT'S A GREAT LITTLE MACHINE.

I SEE YOU GOT THE RANDOM ACCESS MEMORY.

FULL FLOATING DECIMAL.

REDUNDANT VOCODING SCHEME.

GEOMETRIC RECALL AND THE SOLUTION INTERLACE.

YOU DO UNDERSTAND ALL OF THIS, DON'T YOU?

YES, OF COURSE.

YOU SEEM TO BE VERY COMFORTABLE WITH THAT COMPUTER, MR. STATON.

HE SHOULD BE, DICK'S GOT 2 DEGREES IN ELECTRONICS.

I WAS WITH THE SPACE PROGRAM.

UNTIL IT DRIED UP.

THAT'S WHEN WE WENT INTO REAL ESTATE.

INTERESTING.

VERY INTERESTING.

MERRY CHRISTMAS, SANTA CLAUS HAS ARRIVED.

WHERE IN BLAZES HAVE YOU BEEN?

LOOK AT THE OUTFIT.

AND THIS IS WHAT IT WAS ALL ABOUT.

VON STERNS RIDING CROP.

THE LITTLE SLOBS SYMBOL OF AUTHORITY.

AND IT IS FILLED WITH THE BIGGEST DIAMONDS YOU HAVE EVER SEEN.

LOOK AT THESE!

DIAMONDS, OF COURSE.

MUCKETY MUCK IN CHARGE OF LOOTING.

STASHES AWAY A FORTUNE FOR HIMSELF.

IF WE GIVE IT TO HIM, MAYBE HE WILL DROP THE WHOLE THING.

YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING, FRIEND.

WE GIVE HIM THIS, IT'LL JUST MAKE IT TIME TO FILL THOSE FOUR GRAVES.

YEAH, BUT WE GOT TO DO SOMETHING.

BEFORE VON STERN STARTS HIS INQUISITION AGAIN.

YES. WELL, DURING MY TRAVELS, I INSPECTED THAT TANK OUT THERE...

THE ONE WITH THE CANON, AND THE MACHINE GUN.

BUST OUT OF HERE, IN BROAD DAYLIGHT, IT'S SUICIDE!

IT'S SUICIDE TO STAY HERE.

BESIDES, I WANT TO SEE VON STERN'S FACE WHEN WE BUST OUT ON HIM A SECOND TIME.

DON'T YOU SEE, IT ALL FITS. HE'S AN ELECTRONICS EXPERT.

GINNY, WHERE COULD IT BE?

AMBER, MAYBE WE ARE WRONG.

JUST BECAUSE STANTON HAS DEGREES IN ELECTRONICS...

EVEN IF THEY DID STEAL THEIR OWN BROOCH FOR WHAT EVER REASON,

WHY WOULD THEY THROW A FORMAL PARTY,

WHEN THE BROOCH IS BOUND TO BE DISCOVERED MISSING?

GINNY, DON'T YOU SEE, THE PARTY MAKES EVERYTHING FIT.

WHEN THE SAFE IS OPEN IN FRONT OF WITNESSES AND THE BROOCH IS GONE,

THEY'LL HAVE AN IRONCLAD CLAIM FOR THE INSURANCE MONEY.

NOW I JUST KNOW THAT THE BROOCH IS IN HERE SOMEWHERE.

HALT!

HALT!

HALT!

HALT!

HOLD ON, HERE WE GO!

WE GOT IT, BABY!

ALRIGHT BOYS, IT'S ABOUT TIME WE DID IT.

YEAH!

WHAT WE ARE GOING TO DO NEXT, IS GET IN TOUCH WITH OUR ANIMAL INSTINCTS.

NOW ONCE YOU'VE MADE CONTACT, START TO BECOME THAT ANIMAL.

JUST LET GO OF ALL YOUR INHIBITIONS.

JUST CONCENTRATE, FEEL IT.

THAT'S IT.

THAT'S IT, NOW YOU'RE STARTING TO DO IT.

NOW YOU ARE STARTING TO FEEL IT.

THAT'S MARVELOUS.

THEY'LL BE OPENING THE SAFE IN ABOUT FIVE MINUTES.

I'VE GOT TO BE THERE TO PICK UP YOUR BROOCH.

MEOW.

FIRE!

FIRE, FIRE!

WHAT'S ON FIRE?

YOUR BUNGALOW.

WHAT!

I HOPE THE SMOKE BOMBS FOOL STANTON.

I'LL SEE IF HE'S COMING.

HE'S COMING, ALRIGHT.

PLEASE MAKE IT WORK.

ALRIGHT, FREEZE!

JOYCE, GET OUT OF HERE.

GO!

VERY GOOD, LADIES.

SHALL I BRING THE LIFEGUARD?

LET THEM SOAK FOR A WHILE.

YEAH, DIAMONDS DON'T RUST, DO THEY?

I DON'T THINK SO.

WELL TATTOO, HOW DID WE DO?

VERY WELL, JUST LIKE ANGELS.

THANKS.

WE GOT MORE THAN WE BARGAINED FOR.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

PLEASURE, TATTOO.

- BYE, MR. ROARKE. - THANK YOU.

WELL...

I AH... I SINCERELY REGRET YOU CANNOT KEEP THE DIAMONDS,

BUT THEY ARE BEING RETURNED TO THE MILROW FAMILY, FROM WHOM THEY WERE LOOTED.

NO SORRIER THAN I AM.

PERHAPS THERE IS SOMETHING TO CHEER YOU UP.

THE MILROW FAMILY HAS ASKED ME TO GIVE YOU THIS IN APPRECIATION.

A $100,000 FINDERS FEE.

100...

HEY... HEY, THEY ARE OKAY FOLKS.

IT'S EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED FOR MY DEAL.

PLUS FIFI. YOU KNOW,

THIS IS ONE FANTASY THAT'S BEEN REALLY FULFILLING.

AWE.

TELL ME, MR. ROARKE, WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO VON STERN?

WELL, THE COLONEL MAY HAVE COME TO MY ISLAND UNANNOUNCED,

BUT I ASSURE YOU THAT'S NOT THE WAY HE IS LEAVING.

NO, HE IS BEING RETURNED TO GERMANY,

WHERE HE WILL FACE TRIAL.

ALRIGHT!

THANKS AGAIN.

YOU ARE VERY WELCOME, MR. RYAN. MY PLEASURE.

GOODBYE.

- AU REVOIR. - AU REVOIR.

SEE YA.

THANK YOU.

HELLO, MR. ROARKE.

AND HERE ARE OUR THREE ANGELS.

WELL, HOW DID YOU ENJOY YOUR FANTASY?

MORE THAN WE EVER EXPECTED, MR. ROARKE.

I'M DELIGHTED.

FOR A WHILE, IT LOOKED AS IF THESE ANGELS WERE ABOUT TO GET THEIR WINGS SINGED.

BUT THE IMPORTANT THING IS WE ACCOMPLISHED WHAT WE SET OUT TO DO.

RIGHT.

YES.

AND THE QUESTION IS... WHAT NOW, LADIES?

WELL, WE THOUGHT ABOUT APPLYING FOR POLICE CADET TRAINING,

TO BECOME REAL POLICE OFFICERS.

OHH, AND?

NO WAY, WE ARE GOING BACK TO BEING SECRETARIES.

ALL THE GORGEOUS CLOTHES THE ANGELS WEAR AND THE GLAMOROUS PLACES THEY GO,

THAT'S ON TELEVISION, I GUESS.

I GUESS.

YOU SEE, THE LAST TIME I TALKED TO THE ANGELS...

THEIR FANTASY WAS TO BE SECRETARIES.

WELL, IT WAS NICE MEETING YOU, MR. ROARKE.

THANK YOU, VERY MUCH.

NICE WORKING WITH YOU, BOSLEY.

- IT WAS LOVELY HAVING YOU. - IT WAS WONDERFUL.

- THANKS A LOT. - BYE.

- BOSS? - YES?

DID YOU REALLY SPEAK TO THE ANGELS?

ALL THE TIME, TATTOO. ALL THE TIME.

BUT TELL ME, HOW DID YOUR FANTASY GO?

NOT VERY GOOD, BOSS.

AND WHY NOT, PRAY TELL?

WELL, NO TIME.

ALL THAT TOUCHING AND FEELING, I WAS JUST GETTING THE HANG OF IT.

TATTOO, YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE PLAYING DETECTIVE.

WELL, THAT BRINGS ANOTHER PROBLEM.

WHAT'S THAT?

WHEN I WAS PLAYING THE DETECTIVE, THEY STOLE MY COMPUTER.

I'M SORRY, BUT...