Original subtitles

Good morning. May I help you?

I sure hope so.

You have a nice day.

'All units in the vicinity of Hill and Washington'

'we have a report of a 2-11 at Security United Bank.'

Oh! Oh!

Kiss that one goodbye.

Uh, let's call it in, do a pattern search.

That a boy.

That was CHP, man. Motorcycles.

Motorcycles!

So next time we'll plan for cycles. Big deal.

Come on, let's get these decals off.

Hey, come on, man, we've got a timetable to keep.

Hey, cheer up.

Another hit or two, and the treasury

of the Southern Cal Rally Association

will be solvent.

Hey, this is never gonna work, man.

Look, why don't we just tell them the truth, huh?

We borrowed the prize money.

The word's embezzled, partner.

Yeah, you and your sure-shot highflier.

I'm making it up to you, ain't I?

With a bonus.

So just stow it.

Hey. Ha ha ha!

Really fooled her, didn't it, huh?

Whoo!

Let's get going, the rally passes by here soon.

Alright.

'15, 7 Mary, 1 LA, can you copy a 10'

LA, 7 Mary 4.

'7 Mary 4, please land line S-4 as soon as possible.'

10-4, LA.

Why would Getraer want me to call him?

I don't know. We'd better go to a phone and find out.

I just thought you'd wanna know your mother called.

She's flying into LAX on the 4:40 from Chicago.

My mother, today?

Is something wrong?

No, no, just sounded

like she was coming for a visit.

Look, uh, what I wanted to know was, uh

what happened to those robbery suspects?

Hey, what can I say, uh

we lost them.

You lost them?

Yeah. Listen, I got to go, okay?

- Something's wrong.

My mother's flying in on the 4:40 from Chicago.

Hey, great!

Operator? Hello, uh.

Yes, can I have the telephone number

for Timely Furniture Rentals?

Oh, Ponch.

Alright, I'm coming.

Potzirella?

Yes, this is the place.

Could you guys please rush it?

- Sure. - Thanks.

Yeah. I know, Jon, you're waiting for me at the corner.

The movers just got here.

I'll be over there in a couple of minutes.

Alright? Okay, bye.

Hey, listen, I'm in kind of a jam, uh.

I got to go to the airport to pick up my mother, uh.

Could you guys put this stuff around?

You know, arrange it, maybe?

Yeah, got you. We'll spread it around.

Alright.

'Do not leave your automobiles unattended. Thank you.'

- 'This Area is..' - We're late.

- '...loading and unloading..' - Man, don't look at me.

'Please do not leave the automobiles unattended.'

'Thank you.'

'This area is for loading and unloading only.'

'Please do not leave your automobiles unattended.'

'Thank you.'

'Passengers, please proceed to gate 10-B.'

'Thank you.'

Mom!

Mom!

Aw! Mmm.

I knew you'd be late.

I knew you'd understand.

Jon! Oh, how nice of you to come.

You're as handsome as ever.

Thank you.

Just like my son.

You took the words right out of my mouth.

Let's get your luggage.

Oh, right here.

' - I'm traveling light.

Ah, how long are you staying?

My loving offspring, five minutes in town

and he's already asking me when I'm leaving.

No, no, never mind. Take me to my hotel.

Hotel? Hold it. You think I'd let you do that?

No way. You visit me, you stay with me.

But Francis, I've made reservations.

We'll, cancel them.

Yeah, wait till you see his new place, huh?

Yeah, and don't expect it to be spotless.

I haven't had time to clean it up.

I know how you clean.

'Thank you.'

'This area is for loading and unloading only.'

'Please do not leave your automobile unattended.'

'Thank you.'

Francis...this is your car?

It's not as bad as you think, ma.

This car and I have been through a lot together.

It sure looks it.

Of course, there are a few things I've got to fix up.

Did it come like this?

Comfy, isn't it?

Is something burning?

The price was right.

How right?

I bought it at a fire sale.

It's right near the water

quiet and meditative.

There's a switchboard, laundry room--

'Hi, Ponch.'

Hi.

And the pool, mom.

He's a very popular guy.

Now, there's underground parking, elevators--

'Hi, guys.'

Hi.

There's barbecues, cable TV, fire alarms.

- Hi, Ponch. - Hi.

My place has a great view, mom.

Listen, uh, I really have to scoot

so I'll see you both tomorrow, huh?

Oh, Jon, it's been so nice seeing you.

Yeah, same here. Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

- See ya, Ponch. - Bye.

Uh, it's nothing elaborate, ma

it's just kind of my humble abode

so please don't expect too much, alright?

Uh.

Well, hi-hi, Ponch.

Well, uh, what's your idea of too much?

Uh, listen, I hope you don't mind

I had to use your shower, mine's broken.

Oh, uh...mom, this is Susan Stuart.

- Mmm. - Yeah, we're neighbors.

Well, I've always taught my sons to be good neighbors.

Yeah, you did.

Oh, um, Susan, this is my mother.

Your mother? Wow!

Um, hey, listen, why don't you come inside? Come on.

Yeah, yeah, come on, ma.

It's beautiful!

Not to expect too much.

It's lovely.

This is very expensive.

Oh, it's, uh..

Mom, why don't you go in the bedroom

where you're gonna be staying?

Right in there, ma.

What is all this about? Is this my apartment or what?

Yes. Well, we helped the movers and added a few touches.

I hope you like it.

When do we eat? I'm starving.

Hey, gorgeous, your place or mine?

Oh, yeah. The myna bird's a pill...so watch out.

Bye.

Bye.

'Aah! Francis!'

Francis!

Francis! Oh, I'm getting seasick!

Just stop moving, ma!

Me? It's moving!

Just relax. Trust me.

Yeah, is that what you tell all your house guests? Oh!

Well, if you don't like it, ma, you'll be the first.

Oh, God. At bedtime, I'll take a Dramamine. Oh, my!

So how are the guys?

I got a letter from dad last week.

Oh, well, let me see. Your brother Robert.

He's office manager for your dad.

And your brother Martin

he's head draftsman for the business..

...with four assistants.

Look..

...ever since you moved to Chicago

dad's business has boomed.

'And I know nothing would please him'

and you, and my brothers

more than if I came back and joined the business.

No, no, no, no, it's true.

But that's just not for me.

You're so right.

You don't have a secret boyfriend out here, do you?

Oh, at my age?

Ah, you're a beauty. You know that.

You'll be knocking 'em dead when you're 90.

No, I came to sample some seafood

see some old friends

and have a good time with my son.

Okay. It's good to have you here.

'Cause that bomb scam worked the first time

they'll probably try to use it again.

I'd like to nail those guys before they hurt somebody.

Oh, that's beginner's luck. We'll get 'em next time, huh.

Alright, okay, but you two be careful

you, especially.

I always am.

Yeah, well, I don't want any accidents

spills, near-spills, not even a ding, hmm?

You know, you take all the fun out of it.

Yeah.

- Hi. - 'Hi.'

Hi.

Hi. I'm Frank Poncherello. This is Jon Baker.

Hi. I'm Roberta.

And my name's Janice.

Look, uh, are all those people in the rally, too?

Yeah, we come from all over

the western United States.

- Sounds like fun. - We've only gotten lost once.

Well, everybody else did, too.

Well, look, If you need any help

let me know, huh?

Yeah, uh, we know this area

like the back of our hands.

Hey, that'd be neat, in the next three days we have to cover

over nine hundred miles.

'And every night, there's a party.'

Hey, tomorrow night's a square dance.

You guys wanna come?

'Units in the vicinity of the intersection'

'at Belmar and Lomond'

'respond to assist LAPD, a 2-11 at Century Bank.'

'Suspects reported heading east on Culver Boulevard.'

Sounds like our guys.

Sorry, ladies, duty calls.

Oh, maybe we'll see you later?

Yeah, maybe. Good luck on the road rally.

Alright, thank you.

This is what a road rally ought to be like, huh?

Ah-hah!

LA 15, 7 Mary Charles, in pursuit of 2-11 suspects

heading westbound on Yucca.

Hey, they're gainin' on us!

I hope nobody's messed with that truck.

Hey, don't cringe up on me now!

Woo-hoo!

Well, I'll check out the truck.

Yeah, 10-to-1, it's stolen.

Wait a minute. There it is.

Uh, it didn't have any flames on it

or the one behind it.

That's a neat coincidence, huh?

Better check out our road rally buddies.

You just read my mind, partner.

Okay, I'll write it up. See you back at Central.

And, Ponch, be careful, huh?

Mark, 6-R.

Three forty eight.

Take over for me, Jim

Hi. What can I do for you?

Uh, we just thought we'd drop in, see how things are going.

Oh, Couldn't be better, uh..

Got a good rally here, over 150 cars in it.

Do they all pass through here?

Sometime today, yeah.

Here and six other checkpoints along the route.

We take their mileages, times

and, uh...make sure they're all under the speed limit.

Has anybody been way behind?

Nope, this is one of the closest car rallies

I've ever clocked.

Excuse me, I got to get back to work.

If you have any more questions, just let me know.

Alright.

You got to admit, this is a great cover.

Yeah, but if everybody's gonna be on time

after following those crazy directions

they aren't gonna have time to rob a bank.

Yeah, but it's still too neat.

I mean, you know somebody's dirty here.

Mom?

Who's got the dough, brother?

Well, button up, pal, huh?

Arrest him, officer, delinquency to a minor.

- 'You think you're so smart.' - Mom!

What do you think I am, a bird?

Oh, I'm sorry I'm late.

I expected to be home sooner, but the buses! Ooh!

Buses

Well, I went to a few of the stores

stopped at the market

and got everything I need to make

one of your favorite dishes.

Baked veal, stuffed!

I remember the first time you cooked that.

I didn't know what it was..

...but suddenly I felt like we were

the richest family in the Barrio.

We were.

Maybe not so much in the money

but we were together, we were happy.

I just hope we never forget the values

that made life worthwhile when we were poor.

I don't think we can.

They go too deep, ma.

Why don't you forget this, and come on over here, sit down.

Do you remember Jorge Santiago, Rose's son?

You used to play together.

Play? I used to fight him at least once a week.

Well...do you know that he's made Rose a grandmother?

Two of the most beautiful little boys.

Hey, that's fantastic, ma.

And her youngest daughter married a fine young man.

Mom?

Is that what this is all about?

What do you mean?

You looking out for my happiness.

I mean, I appreciate it, I really do.

But you shouldn't have come all this way just to do that

settle down with a family number on me.

I haven't found that special person.

But it's fun looking.

Yeah, it's fun looking.

But you know what the real fun's gonna be?

Hitting it as lucky as my father did

the first time he saw you.

I love you.

I love you, too, mom.

Now..

...do you want to tell me why you're here?

Oh, relax.

There doesn't have to be a reason for everything.

- Morning, sarge. - Hi, good morning.

- This is my mother. - Aha.

I've been showing her around Central

giving her an idea of what the CHP Is about.

- Hello.

It's very nice to meet you, Mrs. Poncherello.

I'm sure your son's been giving you a top-flight tour.

Oh, yes, he has. It's a pleasure to meet you.

Francis speaks so highly of you.

Well, Mrs. Poncherello, Jon and, uh

Frank are good men.

Would you mind if I spoke to them privately?

Oh, no, not at all. Go ahead.

- I'm sure it's important. - Yeah, it is.

- Be right out, ma. - Excuse me.

Well, I suppose you guys are pleased with yourselves.

Every law enforcement officer in LA

was listening to my units closing in on an easy pinch.

And what happens?

Nothing!

Sarge, you knew about the semi.

I mean, there was nothing we could do.

Ah, three officers led down an alley?

I mean, you should have smelled that one coming.

That trick's as old as the hills.

Well, sarge, uh, maybe your hills

are a little older than ours.

Now listen, Poncherello, don't..

Look, two times those jokers have given us..

...you...you, the slip.

Well, uh, they are slick, sarge.

I mean, we think they have a pattern.

Every time, they have an escape route set up.

A pattern?

You think they're setting up a pattern.

Look, I don't want a Sherlock Holmes or a Sam Spade.

I want traffic officers, not gumshoes.

'Sarge, that's not the way it is.'

Well, just keep it that way, okay?

Okay, now we got a briefing.

Frank, your mother's welcome to sit in if she wants.

Oh, she'd like to, but no time.

Alright.

That's just part of the job, mom.

Does that happen often?

- No. - Oh, yes.

Once in a while.

- Hi, Jon. - Hey, Ponch.

Oh, Grossie, this is my mother.

Oh, Mrs. Poncherello, great to meet you.

Hello.

It's really nice you could be with us today.

Oh, yes, I'm finding it very informative.

Have a nice day.

You know, your mom's really something.

Yeah, mom's always been pretty amazing.

I'm just glad you decided to let her have a good time

and not worry why she's out here.

She's having a good time

and I am worried.

She knows something I don't.

Aw, Ponch.

No, you don't understand.

When they moved to Chicago, my dad flew

she took a bus.

When my mother gets on a plane, something's wrong.

'All units, vicinity of Melrose and La Brea'

'a 2-11 at Federated Bank'

'suspects in late model MG, heading east on Melrose.'

They're going down this time.

LA 15, 7 Mary 3 and 4, rolling from Cahuenga.

'10-4, 7 Mary 3 and 4.'

Are you okay?

I'll be okay when we nail those guys.

Oh, no!

Not you, Ponch.

It's not his motor, it's mine.

That's not so bad.

Hey, thanks a lot.

Can you believe it?

I think we ought to catch up with Roberta and Janice

and take them up on that square dance.

Uh, I can't.

I have my sister's birthday party

but it's business, ask Getraer, alright.

Getraer?

Does he know how to square dance?

Well, if he doesn't, uh, Ponch can teach him.

Whoo!

Ha ha!

Okay, way to go, sarge!

I'm telling you, the dark-haired one's the same chippy, man.

Look, cops can dance, too. Big deal.

Yeah, but he's on to us.

Look, if they don't catch us at the scene

we got the perfect alibi, come on.

A lot of fun, huh?

Yeah, it is.

And you party like this every night?

That's right.

- Hmm. - Oh, yeah.

Oh, may I get you some more cider?

Oh, I'll get it, Mrs. Poncherello.

No, no, no. Stay right there.

Thanks.

Say, uh, does anybody know where tomorrow's course will go?

Only the rally master. That's Jack.

Everyone else gets a set of the directions

the start of each day.

See, and then you have to figure out

the course as you go along.

Except for this year someone stole

a set of Jack's guide sheets.

'Yeah, and it's too late'

'to change the courses, so..'

Would you, uh, excuse us for just a moment?

- Sure. - Sure, we'll be right here.

Okay.

Stolen rally sheets.

Now, that explains why they make it

through the checkpoints on time.

Sure, they just slip in with

the rest of the sports cars free and clear.

And make a quick change on the car.

Magnetic decals probably.

Like those ugly things

you were always sticking on the family car?

Yes, mother.

The car never did run the same after that summer.

What's up?

Well, we got a pretty strong hunch

that somebody's using the rally as a cover

while they do a few, uh, bank withdrawals.

Well, if I wanted to catch them, I would post a lookout

at any bank close to tomorrow's route.

Wouldn't you?

'Left, three blocks.'

Got it.

Alright, right, three miles

bearing left when the road forks.

Got it. Hold it, here's another one

closer yet, closer yet.

California Union Bank

Century and Western.

Century and Western. Got it.

- Oh, good morning. - Uh, good morning.

Don't get up, just, uh, stay right where you are.

Uh, just hear us out, huh, sarge?

We checked the rally course for today.

It passes close to three banks.

I see.

We think one of the banks is gonna be robbed.

Alright, alright, we'll, uh, work with LAPD

and assist with the perimeter control.

You guys take the bank you want.

That would be the California Union Bank

Western and Century.

Strictly routine, ma.

Go get 'em.

Let's hit it.

Be careful.

Uh..

...maybe I shouldn't have come in at all today.

Hey, Mrs. Poncherello

if he wasn't top-notch

he wouldn't be out there.

Thanks, sergeant.

If he wasn't top-notch, he wouldn't be a Poncherello.

There you go.

Good morning. May I help you?

I believe you can.

Look!

Larry!

Are you injured?

They're gonna probably try to get out through the pipes

of the flood control watch.

I'll cut him off.

They want an escape route, let's give 'em one.

- It's alright. - Come on, man.

Will you just relax. Look at the tunnel. What do you think?

- Yeah.

- Alright, let's go. - Alright!

Hey, we're not gonna make it through there.

We haven't got a choice!

Ah!

High marks for brain work, guys.

Hey, sergeant, I want you to notice

no accidents, spills, not even a ding.

Uh, well, it's a good thing.

That was an easy ride.

In closing, I wanna commend officers Baker, Baricza

Cahill, and Poncherello

in the apprehension of our drive-in bank robbers.

It was neat, clean, and by the book.

'You made the patrol look good.'

'I wanna thank you.'

Now...for an unusually pleasant note

'I want to make a presentation.'

For one year's service without an accident

I'd like to present a safety citation

to Officer..

...Frank Poncherello.

Me?

I never thought I'd see the day, either, Frank.

That's why you've been on my tail all week.

You had us worried.

You were getting down to the qualifying deadline.

One more scratch on your motorcycle

would've been back to square one.

- Sure, I planned it.

Thanks for the confidence, partner.

After all, I had you covered.

Look out now, coming through.

Good stuff on its way.

Here you go, Ponch. Homemade by your mom and me

right here in our own kitchen.

- Congratulations, buddy. - Thanks.

Here you go.

Aw!

I love you, ma.

'Hurray, Ponch!'

Hey, hey, Ponch!

She went shopping one day.

It'll all fit back here.

Okay, Mrs. Poncherello

you have a safe trip home, you hear?

- Thank you. - Okay.

Yeah, alright.

Thanks for coming.

When they gave me this, having you here made it all seem right.

I'm glad.

What you're doin' is right for you.

I can't think of a finer way

for a son of mine to spend his life.

I can't tell you how proud I am of you.

Mmm.

Mmm, well... come back soon and try.

Goodbye, Marie.

Esta bien?

Si.