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This is the day room where they're all
sort of
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active. This is about as active as it
gets, yeah?
3
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Jack? You work here?
4
00:00:18,980 --> 00:00:21,660
Every time. You know I do. I've worked
here for three years.
5
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Derek, he's deaf.
6
00:00:23,780 --> 00:00:26,180
She's Dennis, he's deaf. No, I'm not.
7
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This is Lizzie.
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Am I?
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Hannah.
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She's in charge.
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And she's my favourite in a different
way.
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Probably going to marry her.
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00:00:40,450 --> 00:00:41,450
She says no.
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00:00:41,850 --> 00:00:43,070
See, that makes her laugh, doesn't it?
15
00:00:43,590 --> 00:00:44,590
You do, Derek, yeah.
16
00:00:45,890 --> 00:00:46,890
What? I just bought something.
17
00:00:47,290 --> 00:00:48,290
Are you a secret millionaire?
18
00:00:49,270 --> 00:00:50,570
It's not a secret millionaire. Is it a
secret millionaire?
19
00:00:50,830 --> 00:00:52,590
It's not a secret millionaire, Derek.
That's why I'm no.
20
00:00:53,110 --> 00:00:54,430
Secret millionaire says no, though.
21
00:00:54,950 --> 00:00:56,430
Do you know what I'd do if I were you a
secret millionaire?
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00:00:56,910 --> 00:00:58,590
How much money would you be giving me?
23
00:00:58,830 --> 00:00:59,830
20 ,000?
24
00:01:01,930 --> 00:01:03,950
Er... Buy Hannah a house, probably.
25
00:01:04,650 --> 00:01:05,650
And a car.
26
00:01:06,190 --> 00:01:07,790
That's what I do.
27
00:01:08,130 --> 00:01:09,130
He said that?
28
00:01:11,230 --> 00:01:12,450
He's got a heart of gold, hasn't he?
29
00:01:15,990 --> 00:01:17,850
Shame more people aren't like that,
really.
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00:01:18,430 --> 00:01:19,430
How much is left?
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00:01:20,090 --> 00:01:22,610
I don't think there'll be anything left
if you borrow a car and a house.
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00:01:23,950 --> 00:01:26,010
Okay. Just give it to her, then.
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I don't need anything anyway.
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Except Hannah.
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She can have it.
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Dougie.
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00:01:34,650 --> 00:01:35,670
All right? Douglas.
38
00:01:36,210 --> 00:01:37,210
Come here.
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00:01:37,890 --> 00:01:38,890
Why?
40
00:01:39,350 --> 00:01:40,350
To be on the telly.
41
00:01:40,870 --> 00:01:42,090
I want to be on the telly.
42
00:01:42,330 --> 00:01:43,330
Everyone wants to be on the telly.
43
00:01:43,870 --> 00:01:47,210
Well, everybody is on the telly. Anyone
can get on the telly. I don't want to be
44
00:01:47,210 --> 00:01:48,210
on the telly. Why not?
45
00:01:48,290 --> 00:01:49,410
Why would I want to do that?
46
00:01:49,650 --> 00:01:52,510
To show... To show off how good my life
is.
47
00:01:52,850 --> 00:01:56,330
Yeah? Working here, looking like this,
hanging about with you. This is my life.
48
00:01:56,350 --> 00:01:57,350
This is where I work.
49
00:01:57,650 --> 00:01:58,650
This is how I look.
50
00:01:59,150 --> 00:02:00,150
He's my best mate.
51
00:02:00,540 --> 00:02:02,140
Why would I want to show that off on the
telly?
52
00:02:03,980 --> 00:02:05,120
It's a caretaker here, ain't it?
53
00:02:05,400 --> 00:02:07,120
Yeah. I'll see you later.
54
00:02:10,860 --> 00:02:11,860
Alright.
55
00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:17,920
Yeah, this is my little area. It's down
there.
56
00:02:20,240 --> 00:02:21,240
It's all just stuff.
57
00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:25,200
This is the main bit. It's like my bed.
58
00:02:26,420 --> 00:02:27,420
That was there.
59
00:02:30,540 --> 00:02:31,540
It's all right, isn't it?
60
00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:35,660
Well, I don't need anything fancy.
61
00:02:35,940 --> 00:02:37,580
I know it's not like Alan Sugar's
office.
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00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:39,020
The wage isn't great.
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00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:42,380
I'm spending most of my time here
anyway. I get fed three times a day for
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00:02:42,380 --> 00:02:43,380
nothing.
65
00:02:44,020 --> 00:02:47,180
Slippers I get, you know, hand -me
-downs. These glasses aren't mine.
66
00:02:48,340 --> 00:02:49,740
Someone died a few years ago.
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00:02:50,620 --> 00:02:52,640
You know what I mean? So there's other
perks.
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00:02:53,060 --> 00:02:55,880
Do you know why we've got such a fast
computer?
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00:02:56,860 --> 00:02:58,880
Chris Marshall gave it to us. We learned
them.
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00:02:59,150 --> 00:03:02,850
Famous people here, giving us stuff.
Look, that's me from Britain, before she
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00:03:02,850 --> 00:03:05,210
was thinned, before she had her stomach
tied together or something.
72
00:03:06,150 --> 00:03:07,750
Anyway, Chris Marshall.
73
00:03:07,970 --> 00:03:12,250
You know Chris Marshall? After the BT
adverts. They're not his real kids, but
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00:03:12,250 --> 00:03:13,250
he's bringing them up anyway.
75
00:03:13,830 --> 00:03:17,290
My favourite thing on here is YouTube,
and my favourite YouTube thing is
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00:03:17,290 --> 00:03:20,930
animals, and my favourite animal thing
is hamster on a piano. Listen.
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00:03:55,260 --> 00:04:02,160
It's my boyfriend. No I'm not. Why did
she say that?
78
00:04:02,260 --> 00:04:03,260
She always does that.
79
00:04:04,660 --> 00:04:05,660
I like old people.
80
00:04:06,420 --> 00:04:07,420
They're kind.
81
00:04:09,020 --> 00:04:12,120
And they're not going to be around
forever, so I've been nice to them. I
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00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:15,820
old people are nicer to me than anyone
else in the world. I'm nice to them.
83
00:04:15,820 --> 00:04:19,339
Yeah, Mary's nice to me, but she's Liz's
granddaughter.
84
00:04:20,060 --> 00:04:21,519
Oh, is she? Yeah.
85
00:04:23,480 --> 00:04:24,680
Nice to cut their toenails.
86
00:04:24,940 --> 00:04:26,260
I can't bend down or anything.
87
00:04:26,940 --> 00:04:27,960
They give me toffees.
88
00:04:28,260 --> 00:04:30,360
I haven't got any toffees left.
89
00:04:30,660 --> 00:04:32,040
What do you mean? You haven't got any
toffees left?
90
00:04:32,320 --> 00:04:33,320
No.
91
00:04:34,500 --> 00:04:37,100
Well, why didn't you tell me that before
I started? I've got to finish them
92
00:04:37,100 --> 00:04:38,900
anyway, because they're all uneven, so.
93
00:04:39,600 --> 00:04:40,600
You're a good boy.
94
00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:41,880
I'm hungry, boy.
95
00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:43,520
You're the nurse.
96
00:04:46,500 --> 00:04:47,600
You've got to go now.
97
00:04:51,220 --> 00:04:54,460
She's not my girl. Derrick, Derrick,
Derrick. What? Take what you can get,
98
00:04:54,660 --> 00:04:56,160
Take what you can get.
99
00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:59,460
I'm not bothered.
100
00:05:01,700 --> 00:05:03,300
Derrick just cracks me up.
101
00:05:03,910 --> 00:05:04,910
Everybody loves him.
102
00:05:05,190 --> 00:05:07,550
He's just funny. I just think he's
hilarious.
103
00:05:08,050 --> 00:05:09,210
Pudding, who wants pudding?
104
00:05:09,490 --> 00:05:10,490
What is it?
105
00:05:10,670 --> 00:05:11,970
Rhubarb crumble and custard.
106
00:05:12,290 --> 00:05:14,950
Of course it is. Monday. That is my
favourite. It's the rule.
107
00:05:16,050 --> 00:05:18,170
Why has he already got it? Why has he
already got it?
108
00:05:18,790 --> 00:05:19,790
Is that bigger than mine?
109
00:05:24,130 --> 00:05:25,130
Rhubarb crumble and custard.
110
00:05:25,570 --> 00:05:27,110
Who turned it over?
111
00:05:27,870 --> 00:05:28,870
Right.
112
00:05:30,270 --> 00:05:31,270
I was watching that.
113
00:05:32,490 --> 00:05:33,950
Don't turn over. Who always does that?
114
00:05:34,910 --> 00:05:40,550
Look at your trousers.
115
00:05:41,210 --> 00:05:42,169
Does it show?
116
00:05:42,170 --> 00:05:44,790
It shows. It's all over the back. Come
on.
117
00:05:45,170 --> 00:05:46,170
It's just funny.
118
00:05:46,290 --> 00:05:47,290
It's just funny.
119
00:05:52,710 --> 00:05:59,330
I've been here about 15 years, so longer
than I thought I would be.
120
00:06:00,910 --> 00:06:02,400
Yeah. 15 years.
121
00:06:08,140 --> 00:06:13,520
Left school, I didn't have any
qualifications until I was 16, and then
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00:06:13,520 --> 00:06:14,820
job at a shoe shop, but I hated it.
123
00:06:15,080 --> 00:06:19,160
A friend of mine mentioned there was a
job here, like a cleaning job, and then
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00:06:19,160 --> 00:06:26,060
it just took over and, yeah, and got an
NVQ, which was quite
125
00:06:26,060 --> 00:06:31,280
hard to get, but I got it in the end,
and I like it. I like the people I like.
126
00:06:31,630 --> 00:06:38,110
You just get hooked into the job and
then it's sort of taken over my life, to
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00:06:38,110 --> 00:06:42,010
honest. I mean, I have hours, you know,
there are shifts, but I'm here a lot.
128
00:06:42,070 --> 00:06:46,830
I'll stay here on a night off for
company, if anything. They keep me
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00:06:46,830 --> 00:06:49,610
because I don't want to go home to an
empty house, really.
130
00:06:50,310 --> 00:06:51,550
Are you here for that week?
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00:06:52,290 --> 00:06:54,130
I'm telling you that is what I do.
132
00:06:56,390 --> 00:06:57,750
That's the new lady coming in today.
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00:06:58,470 --> 00:06:59,890
Annie, start coming in.
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00:07:00,440 --> 00:07:01,440
This is Derek.
135
00:07:02,220 --> 00:07:03,860
Derek works here.
136
00:07:04,240 --> 00:07:05,119
Hello. Hello.
137
00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:09,440
And this is Tom, Annie's grandson.
Hello. Hi. Hello, Tom. It's all right,
138
00:07:09,440 --> 00:07:11,280
it? It's all right, isn't it? Yeah.
139
00:07:12,020 --> 00:07:15,240
Yeah. We've got your room. We've got
your room ready.
140
00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:16,680
And my computer over there.
141
00:07:17,460 --> 00:07:18,520
Do you know Hamster on a piano?
142
00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:22,300
No, I don't like Hamsters. We haven't
got Hamster. We've got a piano. Oh. But
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00:07:22,300 --> 00:07:24,480
that's a different thing. I'm not in a
relationship.
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00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:26,680
Not married or anything, so...
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00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:32,360
I just... It's never worked out, really.
I'm probably not suited to
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00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:35,980
relationships. And I'm here a lot. I
haven't got time. A lot of people meet
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00:07:35,980 --> 00:07:39,120
people at work, don't they? And I work
here, so there aren't that many eligible
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00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:40,120
men.
149
00:07:48,820 --> 00:07:49,820
Why do you keep hitting?
150
00:07:49,980 --> 00:07:51,260
Huh? Why do you keep hitting?
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00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:52,720
Fungus.
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00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:54,360
Fungus in my hip.
153
00:07:54,680 --> 00:07:56,040
Still playing up, is it? Yeah.
154
00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:57,960
My two best friends.
155
00:07:58,729 --> 00:07:59,910
This is sort of my gang.
156
00:08:00,190 --> 00:08:04,170
When he comes in, we comes in, and
Arthur goes, here comes the in crowd,
157
00:08:04,330 --> 00:08:06,510
Yeah, I don't want to be part of this
crowd.
158
00:08:07,710 --> 00:08:09,110
I'm sort of slipped into it.
159
00:08:09,770 --> 00:08:12,930
He doesn't work here. He's the best
autograph hunter in the gang, probably.
160
00:08:12,930 --> 00:08:15,970
the world. He's an autograph hunter,
yeah. I don't feel the point in it. Bad,
161
00:08:16,050 --> 00:08:17,270
mate, they're bad. What buzz?
162
00:08:17,650 --> 00:08:18,349
The rush.
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00:08:18,350 --> 00:08:19,249
You're a rush.
164
00:08:19,250 --> 00:08:21,530
When did your life get a buzz from
getting an autograph?
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00:08:21,890 --> 00:08:22,869
The McGanns.
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00:08:22,870 --> 00:08:23,870
Steve, Joe, Paul.
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00:08:24,010 --> 00:08:25,010
He's got everyone.
168
00:08:25,130 --> 00:08:26,270
How many autographs you got?
169
00:08:26,470 --> 00:08:27,750
35 ,000. 35 ,000.
170
00:08:28,460 --> 00:08:29,460
My mum died.
171
00:08:29,540 --> 00:08:33,120
He let me move in his flat, didn't you?
He's got a council flat, so he's got a
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00:08:33,120 --> 00:08:36,900
spare room, cos he said you ain't got
kids or anything, have you, or married
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00:08:36,900 --> 00:08:38,940
anything? Not planning on, and that's
not going to change.
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00:08:39,580 --> 00:08:41,140
No. So I let him move in.
175
00:08:41,380 --> 00:08:42,380
Bit of company.
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00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:45,520
But then I was back with him all day and
all night.
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00:08:46,420 --> 00:08:48,140
I've never seen Derek feel sorry for
himself.
178
00:08:48,420 --> 00:08:55,240
He's been through a lot, and he just
gets up, dusts himself off, gets
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00:08:55,240 --> 00:08:56,240
on with it.
180
00:08:56,300 --> 00:08:57,300
He's quite a guy.
181
00:09:00,560 --> 00:09:01,560
She's asleep.
182
00:09:03,080 --> 00:09:04,320
But she knows I'm here, she knows.
183
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:07,560
She still likes me all around, even
though she's asleep.
184
00:09:08,680 --> 00:09:09,680
I like her hair.
185
00:09:10,740 --> 00:09:11,740
It's fluffy.
186
00:09:13,620 --> 00:09:14,620
Joan.
187
00:09:24,900 --> 00:09:25,900
Can you hear her?
188
00:09:26,780 --> 00:09:27,780
She's sleeping.
189
00:09:30,600 --> 00:09:31,600
Still asleep.
190
00:09:32,240 --> 00:09:33,260
I might as well sleep.
191
00:09:40,020 --> 00:09:41,020
I love Joan.
192
00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:42,680
She reminds me of my mum.
193
00:09:43,340 --> 00:09:46,860
Our favourite thing is doing the lottery
together every Wednesday.
194
00:09:47,100 --> 00:09:48,580
That's the only time she goes out.
195
00:09:49,340 --> 00:09:50,340
Except the garden.
196
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,580
It's the garden.
197
00:09:53,160 --> 00:09:56,780
My favourite is the pond. It's my
favourite bit of the whole thing here.
198
00:09:57,140 --> 00:09:58,940
Look. Oh, no.
199
00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:00,400
Worm.
200
00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:02,980
I don't know. You don't like worms?
201
00:10:03,620 --> 00:10:04,620
I hate them. Why?
202
00:10:05,080 --> 00:10:06,140
Because they're weird.
203
00:10:06,420 --> 00:10:08,740
They haven't got a head. At least they
haven't got legs like a spider.
204
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:11,340
I don't tease you with them, though, do
I? So you don't tease me with spiders.
205
00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:14,520
It comes out in the rain. Yeah. And then
the sun dries them. I'll give it a
206
00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:15,520
drink.
207
00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:17,640
Is that its head? Well, that's the
problem, isn't it?
208
00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:19,040
I'll give it both ends in case.
209
00:10:20,280 --> 00:10:22,360
There we are. It'll be all right now.
I'll get rid of him now.
210
00:10:22,860 --> 00:10:23,859
It's got a little house.
211
00:10:23,860 --> 00:10:26,280
I saw a frog in it once, didn't I? You
did? In the summer.
212
00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:29,060
Sometimes in the winter, they keep warm
under lily pads.
213
00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:31,880
I've seen them in here before, but they
are... Oh, a spider!
214
00:10:34,720 --> 00:10:35,720
I'm grounded!
215
00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:42,140
You have to get all this off, it's
soaking!
216
00:10:42,420 --> 00:10:43,760
I will, I will! You're going to get
pneumonia!
217
00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:46,440
You're going to get leeches or
something! Leeches? What from?
218
00:10:46,740 --> 00:10:49,320
Well, there'll be leeches in there, they
won't, they won't... Don't take your
219
00:10:49,320 --> 00:10:50,320
clothes off!
220
00:10:51,100 --> 00:10:52,100
What are you filming?
221
00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:53,960
Anyway,
222
00:10:55,960 --> 00:10:57,880
anyway, anyway... Normal.
223
00:11:02,660 --> 00:11:03,660
Make an apple pie.
224
00:11:04,160 --> 00:11:05,160
I'm doing a pastry.
225
00:11:05,580 --> 00:11:06,940
She's putting the apples I got from the
garden.
226
00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:11,840
Why do you keep looking at Tom?
227
00:11:12,560 --> 00:11:13,560
I'm not.
228
00:11:13,720 --> 00:11:14,740
What? Yeah, he was.
229
00:11:15,020 --> 00:11:16,020
Derek. Keep looking.
230
00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:17,980
He's gay, I think. Probably gay. How do
you know?
231
00:11:18,220 --> 00:11:21,300
He's either gay or married, because all
the good ones are by my age.
232
00:11:21,740 --> 00:11:25,700
Yeah. He can't be straight and single,
because then I stand a chance. Chance
233
00:11:25,700 --> 00:11:26,700
what?
234
00:11:28,460 --> 00:11:29,620
Doesn't matter. He's gay.
235
00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:31,560
I'll ask him if he's gay. No, don't. Why
not?
236
00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:36,920
Because then he'd know that I want to
know. Well, I'll ask him and I won't
237
00:11:36,920 --> 00:11:37,799
you what he said.
238
00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:39,340
No, that would be stupid, Derek.
239
00:11:39,780 --> 00:11:40,780
I want to know.
240
00:11:41,260 --> 00:11:43,200
I just don't want him to know that I
want to know.
241
00:11:44,580 --> 00:11:45,580
See?
242
00:11:46,820 --> 00:11:51,380
I mean, you could ask him what his
favourite films are and TV programmes
243
00:11:51,380 --> 00:11:54,760
stuff and then come over and tell me and
then I'll know if he's gay. But don't
244
00:11:54,760 --> 00:11:55,760
do it subtle.
245
00:11:56,380 --> 00:12:00,080
Ask him his favourite film and then if
he's gay or not. But be subtle. Just
246
00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:01,080
bring it up.
247
00:12:03,250 --> 00:12:09,730
My friend Hannah, she says you might be
gay, right? Right. But you
248
00:12:09,730 --> 00:12:13,610
mustn't, you mustn't, oh, that's good.
And she wants to know, but to not tell
249
00:12:13,610 --> 00:12:18,250
her. But if she just tells me your
favourite TV programmes and films, then
250
00:12:18,250 --> 00:12:19,830
she'll know if you're gay or not.
251
00:12:20,690 --> 00:12:21,690
OK.
252
00:12:21,850 --> 00:12:24,870
Tell her I love Glee.
253
00:12:25,430 --> 00:12:26,750
I think it's fab.
254
00:12:27,730 --> 00:12:31,250
Tell her The Wizard of Oz is my
favourite film because of Judy Garland.
255
00:12:31,450 --> 00:12:34,930
Yeah. And I love her daughter, Liza, as
well.
256
00:12:35,170 --> 00:12:38,890
Tell her my absolute fave is Audrey
Hepburn. She's that girl at class.
257
00:12:39,630 --> 00:12:43,850
And if she likes all of them, you tell
her from me.
258
00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:45,930
Mm -hmm.
259
00:12:46,170 --> 00:12:47,210
You go, girl.
260
00:12:47,630 --> 00:12:48,750
You do that? Yeah.
261
00:12:48,950 --> 00:12:49,950
Do it for me? Ooh.
262
00:12:50,450 --> 00:12:51,450
OK.
263
00:12:54,710 --> 00:12:57,890
He said loads. He said, um, Glee, Audrey
Hepburn.
264
00:12:58,450 --> 00:13:01,170
He's got clients. I'm sorry, Derek.
Listen, I'm not gay.
265
00:13:01,660 --> 00:13:02,880
And I am single.
266
00:13:03,100 --> 00:13:04,120
No, right, okay.
267
00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:09,280
See? No, no, we were just... No, we were
talking and I said that you were
268
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:10,280
probably gay.
269
00:13:10,810 --> 00:13:14,190
Because all the good ones are, and then
he wanted to know, and then I said,
270
00:13:14,210 --> 00:13:17,330
well, why don't you ask what your
favourite TV programmes are?
271
00:13:18,090 --> 00:13:20,690
No, you tell me that, that's why I said
that. Right, it's just that now it seems
272
00:13:20,690 --> 00:13:23,330
like you're making out as if I'm coming
on to you, and I'm not. No, no, no, no,
273
00:13:23,370 --> 00:13:27,070
I'm definitely not, and I just, I was
doing it as a joke, because he said, I
274
00:13:27,070 --> 00:13:29,990
tell if someone's gay from a list of
films, so I said gay films, because I
275
00:13:29,990 --> 00:13:33,430
thought it would be funny, because this
is why I'm single, by the way, in case
276
00:13:33,430 --> 00:13:36,470
you're... Okay, well, forget it. Okay,
yeah. All right. All right.
277
00:13:37,210 --> 00:13:38,210
Is he gay or not?
278
00:13:38,530 --> 00:13:39,530
He said he wasn't.
279
00:13:39,690 --> 00:13:40,690
What's she done?
280
00:13:41,170 --> 00:13:42,250
That was embarrassing.
281
00:13:43,310 --> 00:13:44,310
Thanks, Derek.
282
00:13:45,410 --> 00:13:47,710
It's not Derek's fault, really. It's my
fault.
283
00:13:48,170 --> 00:13:54,730
It's my temper. I've got a temper, as
you saw. I got it all wrong.
284
00:13:54,850 --> 00:13:55,850
Totally got that wrong.
285
00:13:57,390 --> 00:13:58,630
Completely misjudged it.
286
00:14:01,750 --> 00:14:02,750
See you later.
287
00:14:03,110 --> 00:14:04,110
We're going to the pub.
288
00:14:04,650 --> 00:14:05,650
He loves the pub.
289
00:14:05,770 --> 00:14:06,770
Yeah, my favourite.
290
00:14:08,010 --> 00:14:10,150
Huh? It's not what it used to be.
291
00:14:10,510 --> 00:14:11,510
What it used to be?
292
00:14:11,830 --> 00:14:15,370
No, it's always been a pub. It's just
different to what it used to be. It's
293
00:14:15,370 --> 00:14:18,610
changed. It's quite rowdy. And the bar
staff don't say anything because they
294
00:14:18,610 --> 00:14:19,610
slapped.
295
00:14:21,650 --> 00:14:26,390
I was feeding Chris some geese once,
right? Yeah. And then they all started
296
00:14:26,390 --> 00:14:29,610
coming. I was going, bloody hell, and
they were taking it out of my fingers
297
00:14:29,610 --> 00:14:30,389
that, right?
298
00:14:30,390 --> 00:14:33,310
And then I found a goose once. It was
ill.
299
00:14:33,550 --> 00:14:36,210
Where? I know it was ill because it was
flat like that. It was head out like
300
00:14:36,210 --> 00:14:37,210
that.
301
00:14:38,269 --> 00:14:40,890
Where are you going out in public with
that?
302
00:14:41,550 --> 00:14:42,950
I'd like to look after old animals.
303
00:14:43,170 --> 00:14:45,930
That would be good. Wouldn't it? Yeah. I
love baby animals.
304
00:14:46,250 --> 00:14:47,250
Grandad!
305
00:14:47,570 --> 00:14:54,530
I think we should go somewhere. Why is
there a tramp in
306
00:14:54,530 --> 00:14:55,329
the park?
307
00:14:55,330 --> 00:14:58,290
I think it might pump a girl. It looks
like a pumpkin.
308
00:14:58,730 --> 00:15:00,190
No, it's not like me. No, it's not.
309
00:15:00,870 --> 00:15:03,090
We'll come back another day. Yeah. Yeah,
promise.
310
00:15:03,350 --> 00:15:05,490
Take out the poo -coloured jacket.
311
00:15:06,380 --> 00:15:09,100
They are talking about me. They're not
talking about you, are they? Well, why
312
00:15:09,100 --> 00:15:09,779
would they not?
313
00:15:09,780 --> 00:15:11,420
Oh, my God, that's what Peter found.
314
00:15:12,100 --> 00:15:13,980
Darling, you can do so much better than
him.
315
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:15,580
Go and ask him if he was talking about
me.
316
00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:18,760
Just wait here, all right?
317
00:15:26,620 --> 00:15:28,080
What did you say?
318
00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:36,280
Well, I can pitch her.
319
00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:37,680
All right, John.
320
00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:39,120
Is that it, then?
321
00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:40,179
Mm -hmm.
322
00:15:40,180 --> 00:15:41,700
I don't know if I can fix that or not.
323
00:15:42,440 --> 00:15:43,900
It's a bit knackered. Leave it with me.
324
00:15:44,540 --> 00:15:45,540
I'll come back for you.
325
00:15:46,480 --> 00:15:47,480
Shit.
326
00:15:48,380 --> 00:15:50,840
That's what they do with these rooms.
Fill them with shit. Give them too much
327
00:15:50,840 --> 00:15:55,020
space. Honestly, let's get some skips
in. Clear the fucking lot out.
328
00:15:58,860 --> 00:16:02,120
This is... This is his office, isn't it?
We've got to go to an office.
329
00:16:04,240 --> 00:16:05,240
You haven't fixed it.
330
00:16:05,300 --> 00:16:06,300
You don't have to run it away.
331
00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:07,960
Seriously.
332
00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:09,960
She's asked me to fix it.
333
00:16:11,060 --> 00:16:13,100
I've fixed it. Sorted it. Problem
sorted.
334
00:16:13,420 --> 00:16:17,320
In the bin. It's not worth it. See, the
thing is, I don't mind fixing things
335
00:16:17,320 --> 00:16:18,320
that are important.
336
00:16:18,400 --> 00:16:19,400
She doesn't remember.
337
00:16:19,760 --> 00:16:22,120
Yeah, thanks for coming. Lovely to see
you.
338
00:16:22,420 --> 00:16:23,420
All right.
339
00:16:26,700 --> 00:16:27,860
Oh. Bye.
340
00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:29,799
See you later.
341
00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:31,100
Bye. Bye. See you.
342
00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:34,780
He's a nice lad, isn't he? He comes to
see you all the time.
343
00:16:35,160 --> 00:16:36,600
It's not me. He comes to see.
344
00:16:44,280 --> 00:16:48,440
Do you think, would there ever be a lady
or a man upstairs, what could be as old
345
00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:49,880
as a tortoise? That's the oldest animal.
346
00:16:50,180 --> 00:16:51,860
Yeah, they're getting close to it up
there now, Derek.
347
00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:56,140
Average age is about 85 up there. Some
of them up there are knackered. I don't
348
00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:59,140
know at what point you can say a life
has ended, because some of them don't
349
00:16:59,140 --> 00:17:02,560
move. You know, their knees have gone,
their backs have gone, their eyes have
350
00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:03,620
gone, their ears have gone.
351
00:17:03,900 --> 00:17:07,760
Jack, with his hearing aids, battery on
the side of his head. The battery runs
352
00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:09,819
out. I don't see the point of putting a
new battery in there.
353
00:17:10,020 --> 00:17:13,440
But what would you do if you was Jack
and someone said, oh, it's not worth it?
354
00:17:13,520 --> 00:17:15,240
What would you do? You'd say, no, I need
the battery, please.
355
00:17:15,839 --> 00:17:19,960
What would you do if you was old, like a
tortoise, and someone said, oh, don't
356
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:21,460
bother with him, he's under it?
357
00:17:22,119 --> 00:17:24,720
I'd save you. I don't care how old you
was.
358
00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:26,560
Barfing.
359
00:17:26,599 --> 00:17:27,599
That's the weirdest.
360
00:17:27,710 --> 00:17:30,510
Streets are, and everything, and
Cleveland. This is Joan.
361
00:17:31,730 --> 00:17:32,730
It's four o 'clock.
362
00:17:33,050 --> 00:17:34,050
Come and do the lottery.
363
00:17:34,690 --> 00:17:37,190
Well, I feel a bit tired today, dear.
364
00:17:37,670 --> 00:17:39,110
Do you know my numbers?
365
00:17:39,330 --> 00:17:42,710
Two, three, seven, 24, 33, 36.
366
00:17:43,090 --> 00:17:44,090
Where's the money?
367
00:17:46,330 --> 00:17:47,330
There's two pounds here.
368
00:17:48,290 --> 00:17:50,650
Oh, do a scratch card for me.
369
00:17:50,950 --> 00:17:52,130
Yeah. See you later.
370
00:17:52,510 --> 00:17:53,449
Scratch card.
371
00:17:53,450 --> 00:17:54,450
Bye. Bye.
372
00:17:54,650 --> 00:17:56,290
Douglas. Dougie.
373
00:17:56,680 --> 00:18:01,320
Douglas. What do you want? Sometimes, a
cat, if a dog was chasing the cat, and
374
00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:04,240
the cat turns around, the dog stops,
because it's scared of scratching its
375
00:18:04,240 --> 00:18:05,240
out.
376
00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:09,080
But, listen, Douglas, Douglas, Douglas,
377
00:18:09,860 --> 00:18:10,839
Douglas,
378
00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:11,840
Douglas, Douglas,
379
00:18:13,460 --> 00:18:15,520
Douglas, Douglas, Douglas, Douglas.
380
00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:17,360
What?
381
00:18:17,740 --> 00:18:18,740
What?
382
00:18:19,060 --> 00:18:20,420
What? I've forgotten.
383
00:18:21,130 --> 00:18:22,130
Answer straight away.
384
00:18:22,250 --> 00:18:24,930
I'm trying to drive a butler. You're not
the only one on here. We've got
385
00:18:24,930 --> 00:18:27,970
passengers. If I put this round a lamp,
do you know what shit I'd get into?
386
00:18:29,310 --> 00:18:32,630
Just calm down. We can have a chat when
we get back. We've got nothing to do all
387
00:18:32,630 --> 00:18:35,030
afternoon. Do you know what it's like?
It's like having a wasp in the car.
388
00:18:35,250 --> 00:18:37,890
Do you know when you're driving, you've
got this extra stress going on? That's
389
00:18:37,890 --> 00:18:41,630
what he's like. What would win out of a
suicide bomber and a shark?
390
00:18:41,870 --> 00:18:44,850
Douglas. How does he drive like that?
How would he drive like this, having
391
00:18:44,850 --> 00:18:47,770
going on in his head? Douglas. This is
what it's like every Wednesday we go out
392
00:18:47,770 --> 00:18:48,649
for the lottery ticket.
393
00:18:48,650 --> 00:18:49,650
We're giving it this.
394
00:18:49,820 --> 00:18:50,820
Six there, a good sign.
395
00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:54,280
Thank you very much.
396
00:18:57,720 --> 00:18:58,720
Joan died.
397
00:19:01,180 --> 00:19:03,060
I've got to tell her family now.
398
00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:07,380
I'm worried about telling Derek,
actually.
399
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:10,880
Joan, do you want ten pounds?
400
00:19:11,100 --> 00:19:12,120
On a scratch card?
401
00:19:12,620 --> 00:19:13,620
You might have been lucky.
402
00:19:15,140 --> 00:19:16,820
Anna, good for her.
403
00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:19,900
Joan, you won £10 on a scratch card.
404
00:19:20,340 --> 00:19:21,299
Unbelievably lucky.
405
00:19:21,300 --> 00:19:23,280
Hello. I can't... Brilliant.
406
00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:26,240
Yeah. Can I have a little, um, with you?
Yeah.
407
00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:28,600
You see a good millionaire?
408
00:19:31,220 --> 00:19:32,220
What?
409
00:19:35,140 --> 00:19:37,000
I accept when anyone dies.
410
00:19:40,420 --> 00:19:41,420
They're always dying.
411
00:19:43,940 --> 00:19:44,940
See how old?
412
00:19:46,860 --> 00:19:48,580
But Joan is the worstest one here ever.
413
00:19:49,360 --> 00:19:50,360
She's my favourite.
414
00:19:59,680 --> 00:20:00,720
Want to say goodbye, darling?
415
00:20:01,540 --> 00:20:02,540
Yeah.
416
00:20:10,100 --> 00:20:11,100
Wait here.
417
00:20:36,910 --> 00:20:37,910
I don't.
418
00:20:40,210 --> 00:20:43,290
Sorry about any times we ever argued.
419
00:20:47,090 --> 00:20:48,310
I miss her.
420
00:20:53,450 --> 00:20:54,910
She's not here to make me feel better.
421
00:20:55,450 --> 00:20:56,630
She's here to make me feel better.
422
00:20:58,810 --> 00:21:04,090
If I were used to break so much, I
might... Like, I've got something...
423
00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:09,420
I go, sorry, you're sorry. If it's an
accident, then you're not bad.
424
00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:13,240
She took me on the head.
425
00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:20,680
She said, it's all right, and it won't
be feel bad. It's like magic.
426
00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:23,560
And she said,
427
00:21:24,100 --> 00:21:25,620
kindness is magic, Derek.
428
00:21:29,700 --> 00:21:33,820
It's more important to be kind than
clever or good -looking.
429
00:21:34,840 --> 00:21:36,360
I'm not clever or good looking, but I'm
kind.
430
00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:26,320
You all right, Derek? Yeah.
431
00:22:27,260 --> 00:22:28,500
Are you going to come and talk to
anyone?
432
00:22:28,760 --> 00:22:30,740
No, I'm... No, I'll watch a deal on Odo
in a minute.
433
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:32,200
Are you sure? Yeah.
434
00:22:33,900 --> 00:22:34,900
Mary's come to see you.
435
00:22:37,020 --> 00:22:38,020
Go, darling.
436
00:22:45,820 --> 00:22:47,200
Sorry, Joan, darling. Thank you.
437
00:23:14,030 --> 00:23:15,650
Have you had something to eat? Yeah,
Pringles.
438
00:23:15,870 --> 00:23:16,689
Is that all?
439
00:23:16,690 --> 00:23:17,690
Yeah, I had a lot, though.
440
00:23:17,810 --> 00:23:18,810
You don't want a drink?
441
00:23:20,490 --> 00:23:21,950
Tom. All right? Hey.
442
00:23:22,890 --> 00:23:23,890
Joan died.
443
00:23:24,370 --> 00:23:25,610
Yeah, sorry about that.
444
00:23:27,130 --> 00:23:29,670
She needs a boyfriend now, because I'm
going out to marry.
445
00:23:30,550 --> 00:23:31,830
All right.
446
00:23:32,150 --> 00:23:33,390
She had butted a lady in the pub.
447
00:23:33,870 --> 00:23:34,870
Did she? Yeah.
448
00:23:35,090 --> 00:23:37,970
Yeah, it's a little Audrey Hepburn move.
449
00:23:40,010 --> 00:23:41,990
Do you want to go for a drink? Yes,
yeah.
450
00:23:42,510 --> 00:23:43,510
Can I come?
451
00:23:50,909 --> 00:23:52,410
No. How is it, all right?
452
00:23:52,630 --> 00:23:53,850
Yeah, a bit sad.
453
00:23:54,310 --> 00:23:55,350
Sad? Yeah.
454
00:23:55,710 --> 00:23:56,529
I like you.
455
00:23:56,530 --> 00:23:57,930
Oh, thanks.
456
00:23:59,010 --> 00:24:00,010
Thank you.
457
00:24:01,710 --> 00:24:06,050
What pub are we going to?
458
00:24:06,490 --> 00:24:09,470
Maybe we should go to a different one,
so you can have someone else.
459
00:24:10,650 --> 00:24:11,650
She's laughing.
32759
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