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1
00:00:12,040 --> 00:00:13,920
? Doo doo doo, doo doo doo
2
00:00:16,400 --> 00:00:18,839
? Doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo. ?
3
00:00:18,840 --> 00:00:21,159
{\an8}Ugh... Ugh!
4
00:00:21,160 --> 00:00:22,320
{\an8}Ugh... Urgh!
5
00:00:23,360 --> 00:00:24,560
{\an8}THEY LAUGH
6
00:00:25,640 --> 00:00:29,319
{\an8}So, I'm currently shovelling up...
doggy doodoo.
7
00:00:29,320 --> 00:00:30,719
{\an8}Oi, poo patrol!
8
00:00:30,720 --> 00:00:32,080
{\an8}You missed some!
9
00:00:35,880 --> 00:00:38,039
{\an8}It is possible to remain cool...
10
00:00:38,040 --> 00:00:40,119
{\an8}...especially when
you're being watched
11
00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:41,840
{\an8}by the most handsomest boy ever.
12
00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:45,880
THEY GAG
13
00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:49,800
SQUELCH
Aah!
14
00:00:56,240 --> 00:00:57,280
Ugh...
15
00:00:58,320 --> 00:00:59,479
SHE SHUDDERS
16
00:00:59,480 --> 00:01:01,080
So, here's the rewind.
17
00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:04,480
SCHOOL BELL RINGS
18
00:01:05,640 --> 00:01:07,199
First 3v3 league match today,
19
00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:08,880
against Jessica and the Comets!
20
00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:14,639
This is huge -
21
00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:15,679
but we're ready.
22
00:01:15,680 --> 00:01:16,720
Bring it!
23
00:01:18,720 --> 00:01:21,519
Dylan! Star of the football team.
24
00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:23,639
I've loved him since
I first laid eyes on him.
25
00:01:23,640 --> 00:01:24,959
Three whole days.
26
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:26,919
Eyes on me.
CLICKING
27
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:31,119
Match pack - contains directions,
game stats and our blood types.
28
00:01:31,120 --> 00:01:33,200
I added our star signs too.
29
00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:37,199
See you all tomorrow.
30
00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:39,159
Er, Jim, we have a match.
31
00:01:39,160 --> 00:01:40,479
Ah, yes...
32
00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:42,799
That's why I've got this bag
of small clothes.
33
00:01:42,800 --> 00:01:44,800
Right. Put your gear on.
34
00:01:46,800 --> 00:01:48,399
What are these?
35
00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:50,239
I mean, the smell.
36
00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:51,719
And what is that stain?
37
00:01:51,720 --> 00:01:56,799
Best guess, rancid egg salad,
chorizo juice and some pilchards.
38
00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:59,839
Ugh, how is anyone supposed to
take us seriously wearing this?
39
00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:01,959
Ha, ha! Oh, they won't.
40
00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:04,239
Ha, ha, ha.
At least I'm not totally invisible.
41
00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:05,879
I am not!
42
00:02:05,880 --> 00:02:07,639
Sorry. I didn't see you there.
43
00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:10,159
OK, fix your number on.
44
00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:11,639
But take your top...
45
00:02:11,640 --> 00:02:12,799
STAPLER CLICKS
Ow!
46
00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:14,719
...off first.
47
00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:16,679
That's a level two laceration.
48
00:02:16,680 --> 00:02:18,159
This is ridiculous!
49
00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:19,640
Who do I complain to?
50
00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:25,919
You'll have to let yourself in.
51
00:02:25,920 --> 00:02:27,439
I have a mindfulness class.
52
00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:30,079
I'm currently the best
at being relaxed.
53
00:02:30,080 --> 00:02:31,639
Oh, here's your little friend?
54
00:02:31,640 --> 00:02:33,039
I'm Clanger.
55
00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:34,479
And I'm not little.
56
00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:35,959
Of course you're not, Clangy.
57
00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:37,279
My mistake.
58
00:02:37,280 --> 00:02:40,239
Would you like to come back
with Conor for squash and biscuits?
59
00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:42,119
I can't. I have a football match.
60
00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:43,919
I'm the goalie.
61
00:02:43,920 --> 00:02:45,719
I also scare people.
62
00:02:45,720 --> 00:02:48,039
Good for you.
63
00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:51,519
Hey, Conor, why don't you try out
for the team, too?
64
00:02:51,520 --> 00:02:53,239
I could do with a hype man.
65
00:02:53,240 --> 00:02:54,719
Plus, team's worshipped.
66
00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:56,120
Sports drink for the match?
67
00:02:57,560 --> 00:02:59,720
Just being recognised is cool.
68
00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:02,119
Slight issue.
69
00:03:02,120 --> 00:03:03,239
I suck.
70
00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:05,239
Yeah, I know, I've seen you play.
71
00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:06,919
Do you think you could get me
on the team?
72
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:08,239
Is my hype man doubting me?
73
00:03:08,240 --> 00:03:09,919
Not for a second.
74
00:03:09,920 --> 00:03:11,200
Clangy.
75
00:03:18,960 --> 00:03:20,519
Well done, Hudson. Very good today.
76
00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:21,719
You're becoming quite a sportsman.
77
00:03:21,720 --> 00:03:23,359
You're very tall now.
Don't get carried away.
78
00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:24,399
There we are.
79
00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:25,439
Brand-new kit?
80
00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:27,279
Why don't the Vipers
get gear like this?
81
00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:29,279
Those extra-padded socks
make the players soft.
82
00:03:29,280 --> 00:03:31,879
But I'm loving those football
vuvuzelas.
83
00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:33,519
My suggestion.
84
00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:35,399
VUVUZELA HONKS
85
00:03:35,400 --> 00:03:37,799
Well, it was between this
and giant foam fingers.
86
00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:38,919
BOING!
87
00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:40,439
Ah, he got both!
88
00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:42,479
Holt gets them a new kit every year.
89
00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:44,719
Every other sport is on a list.
90
00:03:44,720 --> 00:03:46,519
Yeah, we're lined up for 2042.
91
00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:49,719
Even then, our sponsor will probably
be Mr Symonds,
92
00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:52,160
owner of the big joke shop
on the high street.
93
00:03:55,480 --> 00:03:57,640
I've heard enough. Mr Holt?
94
00:03:59,040 --> 00:04:00,159
Ah, Ms O'Neill.
95
00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:02,720
What trivialities
are on today's agenda?
96
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:07,639
The Vipers should be respected as a
proper team and get decent gear.
97
00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:09,079
I wholeheartedly agree.
98
00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:10,399
Wait, really?
99
00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,839
Mm. Just remind me
what titles you've won
100
00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:14,559
and I'll have it arranged.
101
00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:15,919
Nothing just yet.
102
00:04:15,920 --> 00:04:18,479
Oh, do let me know
when that changes.
103
00:04:18,480 --> 00:04:20,360
Right! To the bus.
104
00:04:23,760 --> 00:04:25,279
They get a bus?!
105
00:04:25,280 --> 00:04:27,359
Aoife, we're going to be... Late.
106
00:04:27,360 --> 00:04:28,759
But I wouldn't worry.
107
00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:30,359
That's non-regulation gear.
108
00:04:30,360 --> 00:04:33,959
I just called the ref to inform him,
and he said Comets get a walkover.
109
00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:34,999
RECORD SCRATCH
110
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:37,559
Aw. First proper match
and we don't even get to play!
111
00:04:37,560 --> 00:04:38,639
JIM: Yes!
112
00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:41,759
Great. That means
I can watch the lads' footy.
113
00:04:41,760 --> 00:04:43,799
Aw, pity.
114
00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:45,719
I did ask the ref to overlook it,
115
00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:49,080
but we all know you guys aren't
really a serious team.
116
00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:56,999
It's the football team!
That means Dylan should be around.
117
00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:58,639
Usually, when I talk to a boy,
118
00:04:58,640 --> 00:05:01,680
I have something disgusting
stuck on my face.
119
00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:06,120
Clear! Good to go.
120
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:12,799
Hey, have you seen Dylan around?
121
00:05:12,800 --> 00:05:13,959
He'll be here soon.
122
00:05:13,960 --> 00:05:15,439
I'm minding his new kit for him.
123
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:16,479
Why?
124
00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:17,599
Oh, I just want to say hi.
125
00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:19,160
You know, to the real thing.
126
00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:22,239
Electricity.
127
00:05:22,240 --> 00:05:24,440
Is that rigatoni in your hair?
128
00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:27,479
Ah, yeah.
129
00:05:27,480 --> 00:05:28,759
LAUGHTER
130
00:05:28,760 --> 00:05:31,480
I was just... keeping it for later.
131
00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:35,199
You've ruined Dylan's new kit!
132
00:05:35,200 --> 00:05:36,679
It's fine...
133
00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:37,719
...ish.
134
00:05:37,720 --> 00:05:39,479
No, it's not.
135
00:05:39,480 --> 00:05:40,959
Team gear is important.
136
00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:42,399
Mifa doesn't get that.
137
00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:43,559
Er, yeah, I do.
138
00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:46,399
How could you?! Wearing that rag
you had on yesterday?
139
00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:48,839
That was just while we were waiting
for our brand-new kit to arrive.
140
00:05:48,840 --> 00:05:49,959
I'm sorting it myself.
141
00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:50,999
Ooh!
142
00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:55,759
Can we get matching chiffon neck
scarves for colder gyms?
143
00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:59,039
Yeah! And... fur-trimmed gloves.
144
00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:00,719
How are you going to sort all this?
145
00:06:00,720 --> 00:06:02,759
I'd love to see a hand-out.
146
00:06:02,760 --> 00:06:04,399
Total lie incoming.
147
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:07,879
I've done it before back home,
and I'll be happy to do it again
148
00:06:07,880 --> 00:06:09,920
for my proper, serious team.
149
00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:14,640
And now to enjoy their admiration.
150
00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:18,360
Is that rigatoni in your hair?
151
00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:26,640
So...
152
00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:29,839
When do I get my kit, teamy?
153
00:06:29,840 --> 00:06:31,999
Yeah... Not happening.
154
00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:33,999
But I thought you said
you could swing it.
155
00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:35,599
Holt's had enough of me.
156
00:06:35,600 --> 00:06:37,079
I got in a spat with the ref,
157
00:06:37,080 --> 00:06:39,559
and now Holt's just got
the dentist bill, so...
158
00:06:39,560 --> 00:06:41,239
Ah, right.
159
00:06:41,240 --> 00:06:43,759
Well, let's see if we can think
of a plan B.
160
00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:44,879
Oi!
161
00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:46,760
Players only in this area.
162
00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:50,440
Thank you, Anita.
163
00:06:54,760 --> 00:06:56,319
Here we are.
164
00:06:56,320 --> 00:06:57,720
Good job out there.
165
00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:02,719
I'm offering my service
as team motivator.
166
00:07:02,720 --> 00:07:04,039
Interested?
167
00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:06,079
Kit boy. Take it or leave it.
168
00:07:06,080 --> 00:07:07,879
Gratefully accepted.
169
00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:10,080
Lads, dirty gear here.
170
00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:14,440
My eyes! It's stinging my eyes!
171
00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:16,639
Clanger!
172
00:07:16,640 --> 00:07:18,839
Oh... It's you.
173
00:07:18,840 --> 00:07:22,959
I came here with orange slices
and motivational quotes,
174
00:07:22,960 --> 00:07:26,199
and now I'm covered in sweaty socks
and jockstraps.
175
00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:28,839
Yeah. You'll never make it
to the pizza party later.
176
00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:29,960
Pizza?
177
00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:33,639
That's it.
178
00:07:33,640 --> 00:07:35,639
I need to become a player.
179
00:07:35,640 --> 00:07:37,160
I just need a plan.
180
00:07:45,480 --> 00:07:47,519
So, slight problem.
181
00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:49,559
New kit costs A LOT -
182
00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:51,599
but I have a solution.
183
00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:54,919
Mum, do you happen to have several
hundred pounds to spare?
184
00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:57,199
Sure. Yeah.
Just check my purse, there.
185
00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:58,919
Do I detect sarcasm?
186
00:07:58,920 --> 00:08:00,000
A smidge.
187
00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:02,479
Ooh! Who are they for?
188
00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:03,799
Don't touch.
189
00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:06,279
Cupcakes for my mindfulness class.
190
00:08:06,280 --> 00:08:07,959
We're all about non-judgment -
191
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:11,479
but you should have tasted Linda's
Battenbergs last week.
192
00:08:11,480 --> 00:08:12,599
SHE GAGS
193
00:08:12,600 --> 00:08:13,719
That's it!
194
00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:17,239
The Vipers will go door to door
selling delicious baked goods.
195
00:08:17,240 --> 00:08:18,679
Genius.
196
00:08:18,680 --> 00:08:20,799
I mean, I've baked a bit before.
197
00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:22,360
How hard can it be?
198
00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,079
Boom.
199
00:08:30,080 --> 00:08:31,439
Bet you weren't expecting that.
200
00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:32,999
Bring on the cash.
201
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,399
Easy.
202
00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:38,880
Come back when you can play a
real sport like darts - or curling.
203
00:08:40,640 --> 00:08:42,599
DOOR SLAMS
204
00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:44,639
I'm almost through
my designated houses
205
00:08:44,640 --> 00:08:46,759
and I still haven't sold one cake.
206
00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:47,879
Nor me.
207
00:08:47,880 --> 00:08:50,519
And this constant bell ringing
is ruining my manicure.
208
00:08:50,520 --> 00:08:54,039
And I reckon ten stitches
after the Chihuahua incident.
209
00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:56,120
Aoife said this would be easy.
210
00:08:57,240 --> 00:09:00,159
Come on, girls, this is the house
where we can sell all the cake.
211
00:09:00,160 --> 00:09:01,559
I've shed enough blood for this.
212
00:09:01,560 --> 00:09:02,999
Is this how it went back home?
213
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:04,199
Back home?
214
00:09:04,200 --> 00:09:06,079
Your last fundraising project.
215
00:09:06,080 --> 00:09:07,919
Do you have a report I can see?
216
00:09:07,920 --> 00:09:10,719
A simple log of expenditures
and revenue.
217
00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:12,079
Er...
218
00:09:12,080 --> 00:09:13,519
Not exactly.
219
00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:16,559
You did do this before, Aoife?
220
00:09:16,560 --> 00:09:18,199
Of course I did!
221
00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:21,640
Why would I tell a very harmless
lie about that?
222
00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:27,199
OK.
223
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,479
It may not be entirely true.
224
00:09:29,480 --> 00:09:32,039
Broken promises wound people, Aoife.
225
00:09:32,040 --> 00:09:34,759
Especially when they involve
fashion accessories.
226
00:09:34,760 --> 00:09:35,919
Why?
227
00:09:35,920 --> 00:09:37,159
To impress Dylan.
228
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,159
Dylan?! No way!
229
00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:40,239
Now, come on.
230
00:09:40,240 --> 00:09:41,879
Hard pass. We're done here.
231
00:09:41,880 --> 00:09:43,439
Don't go.
We can still raise the money.
232
00:09:43,440 --> 00:09:46,079
Just one more door, please!
233
00:09:46,080 --> 00:09:47,359
Not this one.
234
00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:48,600
We need the gear!
235
00:09:50,440 --> 00:09:52,279
Aoife... Don't!
236
00:09:52,280 --> 00:09:53,320
SHE KNOCKS
237
00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:56,040
No big...
238
00:09:57,040 --> 00:09:58,719
MUSIC PLAYS INSIDE
239
00:09:58,720 --> 00:09:59,800
...deal.
240
00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:06,719
Perfect.
241
00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:10,159
So, all we have to do is position
ourselves near Holt
242
00:10:10,160 --> 00:10:12,439
and make him think
he's seeing my skills.
243
00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:13,719
Then I'm straight in the team.
244
00:10:13,720 --> 00:10:15,479
But what happens when you do get on?
245
00:10:15,480 --> 00:10:18,439
People finally recognise
my existence...
246
00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:20,399
...and there'll be pizzas
and cookies.
247
00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:23,799
No, I mean, Holt will soon
find out that you suck.
248
00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:28,679
Aha! So I simply fake a season-
ending injury and enjoy the ride.
249
00:10:28,680 --> 00:10:29,999
What's in it for me?
250
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,599
Helping a friend in need.
251
00:10:31,600 --> 00:10:34,519
20% kickback on all
team-related perks.
252
00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:38,359
From a regular smoothie,
that's at least six mouthfuls.
253
00:10:38,360 --> 00:10:40,479
Would you consider 10%?
254
00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:41,759
19.
255
00:10:41,760 --> 00:10:43,479
Final offer.
256
00:10:43,480 --> 00:10:44,640
Deal.
257
00:10:48,600 --> 00:10:52,159
Using the school name to raise
funds without permission.
258
00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:54,959
Just need to use my natural charm
to win them around...
259
00:10:54,960 --> 00:10:56,479
What music is that?
260
00:10:56,480 --> 00:10:57,799
Boy-o-Sphere?
261
00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:00,319
Earth warriors with heavenly voices.
262
00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:01,839
My mum's a big fan.
263
00:11:01,840 --> 00:11:03,959
MUSIC OFF
264
00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:06,599
Your attempts at disarming me
are pointless.
265
00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:08,359
And also quite pathetic.
266
00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:11,520
OK, but what about a
delicious cupcake, then?
267
00:11:13,800 --> 00:11:16,200
That does look surprisingly good.
268
00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:26,320
HE RETCHES
269
00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:30,320
What did you put in those cakes?
270
00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:34,119
Empty.
271
00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:35,480
Oh, Mum!
272
00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:42,479
I am absolutely livid that you used
the school's name
273
00:11:42,480 --> 00:11:44,919
to sell your deceptively
well-decorated
274
00:11:44,920 --> 00:11:47,519
but absolutely vile cupcakes.
275
00:11:47,520 --> 00:11:48,919
Firstly, A,
276
00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:51,399
I'm glad we both agree
the cupcakes were well decorated -
277
00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:54,719
but, B, we had to get jobs to raise
the money for this,
278
00:11:54,720 --> 00:11:56,639
and we had no help from the school.
279
00:11:56,640 --> 00:12:00,399
And, three, it's about time the
Vipers were shown some respect.
280
00:12:00,400 --> 00:12:01,880
Are you finished?!
281
00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:10,119
Can I just say this reminds me of a
time that I had a big fried brekkie
282
00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:11,759
followed by a slice of Black Forest,
283
00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:13,119
and threw the whole thing up.
284
00:12:13,120 --> 00:12:14,520
GURGLING
285
00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:19,279
And it was all brown and creamy.
286
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:20,680
HE VOMITS
287
00:12:22,760 --> 00:12:25,160
Right. If it's jobs you want...
288
00:12:28,520 --> 00:12:30,399
Athlete's foot shavings.
289
00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:32,480
On the upside,
it couldn't get any worse.
290
00:12:36,120 --> 00:12:37,720
THEY COUGH AND GAG
291
00:12:39,600 --> 00:12:40,999
Boys' toilets.
292
00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:42,239
The upside...
293
00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:44,120
...it couldn't get any worse.
294
00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:46,280
Ugh!
295
00:12:47,680 --> 00:12:49,080
THEY GAG
296
00:12:51,120 --> 00:12:52,440
SHE SHUDDERS
297
00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:54,680
SQUELCH
Aah!
298
00:12:58,080 --> 00:13:00,239
Ugh!
299
00:13:00,240 --> 00:13:01,319
SHE RETCHES
300
00:13:01,320 --> 00:13:02,759
And that's how we got here.
301
00:13:02,760 --> 00:13:04,079
There is no upside.
302
00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:05,520
This is the worst.
303
00:13:08,760 --> 00:13:13,319
OK, so, let's forget what happened
with the rousing training session...
304
00:13:13,320 --> 00:13:14,879
Sir? It's pouring down.
305
00:13:14,880 --> 00:13:15,959
We need the gym.
306
00:13:15,960 --> 00:13:17,279
But this is our slot.
307
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:18,399
Jim!
308
00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:19,959
Yeah, not much we can do.
309
00:13:19,960 --> 00:13:21,399
Always footy first for Holt.
310
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:23,639
But we're in the league now,
and we're a proper team.
311
00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:26,279
But we actually have a chance
of winning something.
312
00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:27,319
Poo girl!
313
00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:29,039
LAUGHTER
314
00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:30,880
It's important they get support.
315
00:13:32,200 --> 00:13:34,959
Maybe you could make them
a big bowl of rigatoni.
316
00:13:34,960 --> 00:13:36,119
LAUGHTER
317
00:13:36,120 --> 00:13:37,359
Enough.
318
00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:39,759
My team has been insulted,
my image battered.
319
00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:41,159
Something needs to be done,
320
00:13:41,160 --> 00:13:43,760
or I'll forever be known
as the Rigatoni-Poo Girl...
321
00:13:50,080 --> 00:13:54,600
Sir, we challenge your lads
to a basketball match this Friday.
322
00:13:57,080 --> 00:13:58,679
Aoife, this is reckless!
323
00:13:58,680 --> 00:14:00,359
If we win, you buy us new gear.
324
00:14:00,360 --> 00:14:01,959
SCOFFS: Not a chance.
325
00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:04,639
OK, then. Everyone can watch.
326
00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:07,119
We'll charge money at the door...
327
00:14:07,120 --> 00:14:09,239
...and the winner can keep it all.
328
00:14:09,240 --> 00:14:10,559
I am on fire.
329
00:14:10,560 --> 00:14:15,480
We could use the extra cash for
Midvale-branded highlighter pens.
330
00:14:16,680 --> 00:14:17,880
Challenge accepted.
331
00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:25,599
Has she even checked our stats?!
332
00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:27,439
We have never won a match.
333
00:14:27,440 --> 00:14:30,439
This is like pairing ankle
boots with a long skirt.
334
00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:31,999
Utter madness.
335
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:34,119
I agree. About the match.
336
00:14:34,120 --> 00:14:36,119
I don't take fashion advice.
337
00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:38,119
If I wear it, it works.
338
00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:39,279
Sh.
339
00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:41,679
The lads don't even know
what 3v3 is.
340
00:14:41,680 --> 00:14:43,039
They can hardly dribble a ball.
341
00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:45,239
So, I mean, maybe we'll be OK.
342
00:14:45,240 --> 00:14:46,359
Yeah.
343
00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:48,720
Even Aoife can't make
things any worse.
344
00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:56,399
Knees jellying.
345
00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:59,039
So, hey, thanks for putting
the laundry detergent
346
00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:00,359
on my desk the other day.
347
00:15:00,360 --> 00:15:01,799
Mum said my kit came out fine.
348
00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:03,759
Oh, phew. Great.
349
00:15:03,760 --> 00:15:05,679
It's true. I did that.
350
00:15:05,680 --> 00:15:06,999
Also, just so you know,
351
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:09,719
I don't usually have poo
or rigatoni in my hair.
352
00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:12,559
Is a sentence I never thought
I'd hear anyone say.
353
00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:14,639
Gorgeous and funny.
354
00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:17,879
So, um, are we allowed to talk?
Now that our teams are enemies?
355
00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:19,920
I believe I can make an exception.
356
00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:34,559
Thank you for filling in, Marjorie.
357
00:15:34,560 --> 00:15:37,239
Sheila should be over
her shingles quite soon.
358
00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:38,479
No problem, Mr Holt.
359
00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:40,679
Shushing kids is what I do best.
360
00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:41,919
Sh.
361
00:15:41,920 --> 00:15:43,880
See? Masterful.
362
00:15:46,040 --> 00:15:47,999
195, 196,
363
00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:50,199
197...
364
00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:51,439
Will you keep it down?!
365
00:15:51,440 --> 00:15:52,479
Sh. Sorry.
366
00:15:52,480 --> 00:15:53,679
Sorry, sir.
367
00:15:53,680 --> 00:15:56,919
I'm just trying to beat my record
of 200 in a row.
368
00:15:56,920 --> 00:15:58,479
He's a born striker.
369
00:15:58,480 --> 00:15:59,959
I haven't got time for this.
370
00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:02,559
I'm expecting my new player
any moment now.
371
00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:03,839
A new player?
372
00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:04,879
But, sir...
373
00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:06,879
KNOCK AT DOOR
Aha!
374
00:16:06,880 --> 00:16:08,599
There we are.
375
00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:10,520
It's like I'm not even here.
376
00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:13,279
See you then!
377
00:16:13,280 --> 00:16:14,319
Try mindfulness.
378
00:16:14,320 --> 00:16:16,839
It's great for combating
teen angst and distract...
379
00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:18,039
Ooh, here's my son!
380
00:16:18,040 --> 00:16:20,279
I can't believe it.
After everything I've done.
381
00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:21,399
What?!
382
00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:22,719
I was the one who put in
all the effort,
383
00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:23,879
and Holt didn't even take a look.
384
00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:25,239
Wait. You've been practising,
385
00:16:25,240 --> 00:16:26,959
and Mr Holt won't even
give you a chance?
386
00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:28,519
It's fine, Mum. Honestly.
387
00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:30,359
No. Hello?!
388
00:16:30,360 --> 00:16:32,400
I will make him take a look.
389
00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:40,119
Come on, Conor,
I know you can do this!
390
00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:41,479
Believe in yourself.
391
00:16:41,480 --> 00:16:43,079
Hey, it's the football lads.
392
00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:44,840
Are you on the team now?
393
00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:47,959
Yes... Yes, I am.
394
00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:49,560
Are you going to do some skills?
395
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:52,999
Yeah... You betcha.
396
00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:54,159
Get your phone out.
397
00:16:54,160 --> 00:16:55,439
This is going to go viral.
398
00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:57,360
Make me proud, son!
399
00:17:12,360 --> 00:17:13,759
Agh!
400
00:17:13,760 --> 00:17:15,919
Agh... Gah!
401
00:17:15,920 --> 00:17:18,479
Agh! Oh...!
402
00:17:18,480 --> 00:17:20,159
Agh...
403
00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:21,919
I'm not sure he meant to do that.
404
00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:23,239
Oh, please.
405
00:17:23,240 --> 00:17:25,159
We've just had this bit
power-washed.
406
00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:26,560
Agh...
407
00:17:28,320 --> 00:17:29,639
ENGINE STARTS, MUSIC ON CAR RADIO
408
00:17:29,640 --> 00:17:31,479
Oh! Boy-o-Sphere!
409
00:17:31,480 --> 00:17:32,800
I love them.
410
00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:45,199
In these situations,
411
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:48,159
I find it's always important
to be sensitive.
412
00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:49,479
Poor Conor.
413
00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:52,039
Not everyone in the family
can be a sporting star.
414
00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:53,119
Who knows?
415
00:17:53,120 --> 00:17:55,439
You may be really excellent
at crochet.
416
00:17:55,440 --> 00:17:58,239
Just think of all those lovely
shawls you could make.
417
00:17:58,240 --> 00:17:59,839
HE GROANS
418
00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:01,279
Aoife...!
419
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:02,999
What? What did I say?
420
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:05,639
Conor should hold his head high.
421
00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:08,119
He was willing to risk failure
to fulfil his dream
422
00:18:08,120 --> 00:18:09,559
of being a football player.
423
00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:10,999
OK, we get it.
424
00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:12,279
And you know what?
425
00:18:12,280 --> 00:18:13,559
Oh, she's off again.
426
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:16,279
I think you should go
to this basketball match,
427
00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:17,679
go and watch the football lads,
428
00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:20,239
and maybe pester Mr Holt
for another trial.
429
00:18:20,240 --> 00:18:21,879
He won't even know I was there.
430
00:18:21,880 --> 00:18:23,039
Come on, Conor.
431
00:18:23,040 --> 00:18:25,079
You don't really want to be part
of the football team.
432
00:18:25,080 --> 00:18:28,080
Especially when the Vipers are
going to trash them tomorrow.
433
00:18:35,640 --> 00:18:37,959
Look at the size of them!
434
00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:39,359
Holt wanted the tallest players.
435
00:18:39,360 --> 00:18:40,400
Good luck.
436
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:44,839
Look, I know you're nervous
about this - this is our turf.
437
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:46,759
They may be slightly massive...
438
00:18:46,760 --> 00:18:49,439
...but they have nobody
to match our skills.
439
00:18:49,440 --> 00:18:51,599
Jess! Hi!
440
00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:53,079
My bestie.
441
00:18:53,080 --> 00:18:54,599
Er, what's going on?
442
00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:56,920
Why is Jessica here?
She's not on your team.
443
00:18:57,960 --> 00:19:00,960
Oh, she did a trial
for the team yesterday.
444
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,480
I'm expecting my new player
any moment now.
445
00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:09,359
You're in.
446
00:19:09,360 --> 00:19:11,839
So, technically...
447
00:19:11,840 --> 00:19:13,679
But that's not fair.
448
00:19:13,680 --> 00:19:16,119
Mm. Rules are rules.
449
00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:17,520
Good luck.
450
00:19:21,040 --> 00:19:24,519
I can't understand why Jessica
would play with the boys.
451
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:26,679
She's always so supportive of us.
452
00:19:26,680 --> 00:19:28,799
I know a classic revenge
move when I see one.
453
00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,439
She's an ice-cold assassin.
454
00:19:30,440 --> 00:19:32,920
But who would cross Jessica?
455
00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:35,999
This is about Dylan.
456
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:38,279
What? You made it worse.
457
00:19:38,280 --> 00:19:39,959
He's Jessica's ex.
458
00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:43,159
She still has deep feelings for him.
459
00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:46,359
I didn't make it remotely obvious
that I fancy him.
460
00:19:46,360 --> 00:19:48,919
KEYBOARD PLAYS
? Forget the poo and rigatoni
461
00:19:48,920 --> 00:19:53,120
? You'll be my one and only... ?
462
00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:56,800
Only cost two months' pocket money.
463
00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:00,279
You can't blame me!
464
00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:01,559
For most of it.
465
00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:02,679
Yes, I can.
466
00:20:02,680 --> 00:20:05,919
I'm pointing a giant finger for this
mess in your direction.
467
00:20:05,920 --> 00:20:07,559
Here.
468
00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:08,879
It has so many uses.
469
00:20:08,880 --> 00:20:10,359
We're done.
470
00:20:10,360 --> 00:20:12,399
She means we forfeit.
471
00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:13,639
What?!
472
00:20:13,640 --> 00:20:14,879
You can't back out now.
473
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:16,999
No-one will ever take us
seriously.
474
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,799
If we play, it'll be worse.
475
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:20,599
We'll be humiliated.
476
00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:23,439
I'd rather wear double denim,
thank you.
477
00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:24,920
So, here's the rewind.
478
00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:28,559
Our kit was the worst.
479
00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:30,039
What are these?
480
00:20:30,040 --> 00:20:31,079
The smell...
481
00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:32,639
Rancid egg salad.
482
00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:33,799
...unreal.
483
00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:35,399
Then there was a stapling trauma.
484
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:36,759
STAPLER CLICKS
485
00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:38,279
That's a level two laceration.
486
00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:39,439
And Jess was like...
487
00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:41,719
We all know you guys
aren't really a serious team.
488
00:20:41,720 --> 00:20:44,519
...and I was like,
OMG, firstly, Dylan!
489
00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:46,519
Secondly, we are a proper team.
490
00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:47,759
And then Holt was like...
491
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:48,999
HE VOMITS
492
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:51,639
...and then there was the
rigatoni poo incident...
493
00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:52,959
SQUELCH, LAUGHTER, SHE GAGS
494
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,159
...but I was like,
Vipers versus football -
495
00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:58,080
and then Holt was like,
"Here's Jessica."
496
00:21:01,840 --> 00:21:03,720
So, now I decided to do this.
497
00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:07,640
THEY WHISPER
498
00:21:10,320 --> 00:21:11,759
The cake of death.
499
00:21:11,760 --> 00:21:14,599
And I'll eat it,
just to prove how sorry I am.
500
00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:16,039
She won't.
501
00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:18,559
I will. If that's what it takes.
502
00:21:18,560 --> 00:21:21,039
She could die.
503
00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:22,199
Go on, then.
504
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:25,360
Wow. They're really going to make
me go through with this?
505
00:21:38,080 --> 00:21:39,159
OK, OK!
506
00:21:39,160 --> 00:21:41,879
Stop! For that face alone,
I'd do anything!
507
00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:43,320
OK, we'll play.
508
00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:46,479
We're still going to look
like idiots.
509
00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:50,199
But we'll look like idiots...
together.
510
00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:51,239
Yeah!
511
00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:52,879
Yes, yes!
512
00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:54,840
SHE GAGS
513
00:21:56,880 --> 00:21:58,839
Now, please... Some water.
514
00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:00,719
GURGLING
Ugh!
515
00:22:00,720 --> 00:22:02,560
WHISTLE
516
00:22:04,520 --> 00:22:05,600
Yes!
517
00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:12,800
THEY CHEER
Yes!
518
00:22:19,200 --> 00:22:20,760
Run! Run!
519
00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:24,160
Eat it!
520
00:22:32,760 --> 00:22:34,400
Yes! Yes!
521
00:22:35,960 --> 00:22:38,479
Time out. Time out! Come on.
522
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:39,519
WHISTLE
523
00:22:39,520 --> 00:22:42,599
All right. We need to sort
the line out for a few quick tries.
524
00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:44,319
It's no use. They're too tall.
525
00:22:44,320 --> 00:22:45,920
They make us look fun-sized.
526
00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:48,319
That's it!
527
00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:49,719
Use their height against them.
528
00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:52,039
They're big, but you're quicker
and faster.
529
00:22:52,040 --> 00:22:53,600
GURGLING
Oh...!
530
00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:55,879
SHE GAGS
531
00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:57,479
Slightly queasy.
532
00:22:57,480 --> 00:22:59,239
She's right. It's like a mosh pit.
533
00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:00,799
We duck and dive.
534
00:23:00,800 --> 00:23:01,919
Right. On three.
535
00:23:01,920 --> 00:23:03,319
One, two, three...
536
00:23:03,320 --> 00:23:04,520
ALL: Vipers!
537
00:23:09,760 --> 00:23:11,120
Yeah!
538
00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:22,400
THEY CHEER
539
00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:40,160
Charlotte!
540
00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:49,600
What are you doing?!
541
00:23:56,720 --> 00:23:58,400
THEY CHEER
542
00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:00,640
What was that?!
543
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:02,760
Charlotte!
544
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:09,119
ALL: Ohh!
545
00:24:09,120 --> 00:24:10,159
Yes!
546
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:11,519
WHISTLE
547
00:24:11,520 --> 00:24:14,960
Double KO. They'll need a new
player, or this game is ours.
548
00:24:17,600 --> 00:24:19,759
What was that?
549
00:24:19,760 --> 00:24:21,680
Sit down, sit down.
550
00:24:23,840 --> 00:24:26,439
All right, lads, we need a player.
551
00:24:26,440 --> 00:24:28,359
Oh, come on!
Just because we're losing -
552
00:24:28,360 --> 00:24:29,879
there's barely a minute left.
553
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:30,959
Conor will play -
554
00:24:30,960 --> 00:24:32,879
but if he does, you have to
let him on the football team.
555
00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:34,199
What are you doing?!
556
00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:36,799
You can't be any worse
than you are at football.
557
00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:38,119
Fair.
558
00:24:38,120 --> 00:24:40,559
And, plus, it means
I don't have to go on.
559
00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:42,480
You help us win, we have a deal.
560
00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:47,280
Get the ball in the hoop.
561
00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:49,359
Conor?!
562
00:24:49,360 --> 00:24:50,439
Conor's going to play?
563
00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:51,519
We're a point up.
564
00:24:51,520 --> 00:24:53,479
Once we get the ball,
just keep hold of it.
565
00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:56,719
Aoife, take it easy on him, OK?
566
00:24:56,720 --> 00:24:58,639
Aoife, mark him!
567
00:24:58,640 --> 00:25:00,199
Let him have his shot at glory.
568
00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:02,320
He'll never get it in, anyway.
569
00:25:05,760 --> 00:25:07,440
Make me proud, son.
570
00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:13,560
Agh!
571
00:25:36,480 --> 00:25:38,280
ALL CHEER
572
00:25:44,280 --> 00:25:45,680
BUZZER
573
00:25:47,360 --> 00:25:48,920
Yes, yes, yes!
574
00:25:51,560 --> 00:25:52,720
Yes!
575
00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:56,559
Hang on...
576
00:25:56,560 --> 00:25:57,639
They've won?
577
00:25:57,640 --> 00:25:59,359
Ugh...! What?
578
00:25:59,360 --> 00:26:00,999
What a fun match.
579
00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:02,279
Hard luck.
580
00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:05,239
I would have a sassy comeback,
but right now I need to...
581
00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:06,959
Bleurgh!
582
00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:11,480
SHE SCREAMS
583
00:26:12,720 --> 00:26:14,040
Whoops.
584
00:26:16,680 --> 00:26:19,360
I now dub thee... on the team.
585
00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:26,279
Yes!
586
00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:28,079
Validation at last.
587
00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:29,799
When's the next pizza party?
588
00:26:29,800 --> 00:26:30,879
Now.
589
00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:32,879
But all newbies have pitch poo duty,
590
00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:36,160
and Aoife left a hefty load
up there the other day, mate.
591
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:49,239
I'm sure a fellow Boy-o-Sphere fan
could spare a bit for the girls.
592
00:26:49,240 --> 00:26:50,559
Oh.
593
00:26:50,560 --> 00:26:52,039
Is this where you blackmail me
594
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,559
by threatening to tell everyone
I like Boy-o-Sphere?
595
00:26:54,560 --> 00:26:58,039
Well, they write perfectly
crafted love songs
596
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:00,479
and I, for one, am not ashamed.
597
00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:02,359
Not blackmail.
598
00:27:02,360 --> 00:27:03,959
Bribery.
599
00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:07,159
I happen to have a rare copy
600
00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:10,200
of their Saviours
Of The Planet album.
601
00:27:17,360 --> 00:27:19,280
Check it out! Our brand-new gear!
602
00:27:21,080 --> 00:27:22,679
Good for you!
603
00:27:22,680 --> 00:27:25,959
I'd feel awful if I'd made my
team lose like you did.
604
00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:27,719
Well, my teamies still love me,
605
00:27:27,720 --> 00:27:31,639
because I've sorted out this amazing
new gear with Jim.
606
00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:34,159
Now the Vipers will have to be
taken seriously.
607
00:27:34,160 --> 00:27:35,399
Ah, yes.
608
00:27:35,400 --> 00:27:37,799
The door takings
didn't quite cover it,
609
00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:40,600
so I asked Mr Symonds
to fund the rest.
610
00:27:41,800 --> 00:27:44,840
Now, if you'll all just line up
for a photo...
611
00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:09,400
? Doo doo doo, doo doo doo
612
00:28:11,360 --> 00:28:13,800
? Doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo. ?
613
00:28:13,850 --> 00:28:18,400
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