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1
00:00:26,126 --> 00:00:27,332
Who is it?
2
00:00:27,461 --> 00:00:28,963
It's Chris.
3
00:00:30,931 --> 00:00:32,842
Just a second.
4
00:00:36,937 --> 00:00:37,915
Hey, What's going on?
5
00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:39,540
I'm sorry to bother you, John.
6
00:00:39,673 --> 00:00:41,084
No problem.
ls everything all right?
7
00:00:41,208 --> 00:00:42,585
Yeah, yeah, it's just that...
8
00:00:42,709 --> 00:00:44,780
I was upstairs alone
in my place thinking
9
00:00:44,912 --> 00:00:47,415
that you were down here
alone in your place and...
10
00:00:47,548 --> 00:00:48,458
And what?
11
00:00:48,582 --> 00:00:50,084
And suddenly,
I just felt like...
12
00:00:50,217 --> 00:00:51,662
Like what? Felt like what?
13
00:00:51,785 --> 00:00:54,129
Like I had to do this.
14
00:01:01,361 --> 00:01:03,398
What the hell was that?
15
00:01:11,338 --> 00:01:13,750
Mr. Pearson,
here's a piece of advice.
16
00:01:13,874 --> 00:01:14,852
If you're gonna go camping,
17
00:01:14,975 --> 00:01:16,818
either learn what poison ivy
looks like
18
00:01:16,944 --> 00:01:20,585
or bring toilet paper,
you moron.
19
00:01:20,714 --> 00:01:23,627
That must have been
hard to look at.
20
00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:26,026
Another ass with a rash.
21
00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:30,295
Part of the glamour
I call my life.
22
00:01:30,424 --> 00:01:33,701
John, I put insurance forms
on your desk three days ago.
23
00:01:33,827 --> 00:01:35,101
Did you sign them yet?
24
00:01:35,228 --> 00:01:36,901
You know, I hate it
when you ask questions
25
00:01:37,030 --> 00:01:38,236
you already know the answer to.
26
00:01:38,365 --> 00:01:39,469
Do you really?
27
00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:41,102
Yeah, see, right there,
you're doing it again.
28
00:01:41,234 --> 00:01:43,111
- Forget it.
29
00:01:44,972 --> 00:01:46,042
You're late.
30
00:01:46,173 --> 00:01:48,084
I'm sorry, Margaret,
but it's not my fault.
31
00:01:48,208 --> 00:01:51,121
My taxi was hit
by a runaway hot dog cart.
32
00:01:51,244 --> 00:01:53,520
Of all the lame excuses.
33
00:01:53,647 --> 00:01:55,923
It's the truth!
I'm lucky to be alive.
34
00:01:56,049 --> 00:01:58,825
Yesterday, the president's
motorcade broke down,
35
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:01,523
and he ran inside
to use your toilet.
36
00:02:04,057 --> 00:02:05,331
Okay, that wasn't true.
37
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:06,836
Oh, the day before that...
38
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,371
All right, I lie all the time!
39
00:02:08,495 --> 00:02:10,031
But this is clearly not a lie.
40
00:02:10,163 --> 00:02:12,165
My lies have flair
and imagination.
41
00:02:12,299 --> 00:02:14,802
This whole hot dog story
is beneath me.
42
00:02:14,935 --> 00:02:17,040
Ooh, what is that smell?
43
00:02:17,170 --> 00:02:19,207
Hot dog juice!
I'm covered in it.
44
00:02:19,339 --> 00:02:20,909
Go ahead, taste my coat!
45
00:02:21,041 --> 00:02:23,749
Ooh. Oh, my God, you really
were in accident.
46
00:02:23,877 --> 00:02:25,049
Are you all right?
47
00:02:25,178 --> 00:02:28,523
My head hurts,
and I smell like a big wiener.
48
00:02:30,350 --> 00:02:32,694
I'm so sorry.
49
00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:35,493
Yeah, well, I'm all right now,
but not for long.
50
00:02:35,622 --> 00:02:38,125
Yesterday my purse was stolen,
and now this.
51
00:02:38,258 --> 00:02:39,601
That's two down, one to go.
52
00:02:39,726 --> 00:02:41,205
I'm in big trouble, Margaret.
53
00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:42,671
What are you talking about?
54
00:02:42,796 --> 00:02:44,901
Bad things always
happen in threes.
55
00:02:45,032 --> 00:02:46,636
Celebrities die in threes.
56
00:02:46,767 --> 00:02:48,371
Three on a match is bad luck.
57
00:02:48,502 --> 00:02:50,106
Three strikes, and you're out.
58
00:02:50,237 --> 00:02:51,375
That's from baseball.
59
00:02:51,505 --> 00:02:53,576
Oh, well, thank you
for clearing that up.
60
00:02:53,707 --> 00:02:55,050
But, Linda, this whole notion
61
00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,745
of bad things
happening in threes,
62
00:02:56,877 --> 00:02:58,652
that's just a silly
superstition.
63
00:02:58,779 --> 00:03:00,781
Oh, tell that
to my Great Aunt Hildie
64
00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:04,361
who fell off Mount Everest
after being kicked by a yak.
65
00:03:04,484 --> 00:03:05,986
That's only two bad things.
66
00:03:06,119 --> 00:03:08,190
The yak kicked her twice.
67
00:03:08,321 --> 00:03:09,800
Lord, give me strength.
68
00:03:09,923 --> 00:03:12,096
You said it, sister.
69
00:03:12,225 --> 00:03:14,398
I need all the help I can get.
70
00:03:14,528 --> 00:03:16,371
What are you doing?
71
00:03:16,496 --> 00:03:19,033
Wishing I'd closed that door.
72
00:03:19,166 --> 00:03:20,804
Well, if you're looking
for something to do,
73
00:03:20,934 --> 00:03:22,777
perhaps you can, uh,
finish these insurance forms
74
00:03:22,903 --> 00:03:24,041
like I asked you to.
75
00:03:24,171 --> 00:03:27,983
Fine. Doctor John
Leave-Me-The-Hell-Alone.
76
00:03:28,108 --> 00:03:30,179
There. Happy now?
77
00:03:30,310 --> 00:03:31,618
You've been barking at people
all morning.
78
00:03:31,745 --> 00:03:32,723
What's wrong with you?
79
00:03:32,846 --> 00:03:34,484
If I wanted to talk about it,
I'd talk about it,
80
00:03:34,614 --> 00:03:35,718
but I don't want
to talk about it.
81
00:03:35,849 --> 00:03:37,123
Fine.
82
00:03:37,250 --> 00:03:40,197
Can't you tell
I want to talk about it?
83
00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:42,891
You are such a child.
84
00:03:43,023 --> 00:03:44,969
Okay, what is it?
85
00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:48,801
You ever have bad dreams?
86
00:03:48,929 --> 00:03:51,432
Well, sometimes I dream
that I'm trapped
87
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:53,841
beneath a giant blob
of mashed potatoes,
88
00:03:53,967 --> 00:03:57,107
but then I wake up
and find Lewis on top of me.
89
00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:59,114
Well, at least that
got the picture
90
00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:03,153
of Mr. Pearson's blistered ass
out of my head.
91
00:04:03,276 --> 00:04:05,051
Well, John, if you're having
restless nights,
92
00:04:05,178 --> 00:04:07,715
maybe you should just lay off
the Chinese takeout before bed.
93
00:04:07,848 --> 00:04:11,159
It's not indigestion.
It's something else.
94
00:04:11,284 --> 00:04:13,423
I keep having this...
95
00:04:13,553 --> 00:04:15,089
dream about Chris.
96
00:04:15,222 --> 00:04:16,895
What kind of dream?
97
00:04:20,127 --> 00:04:21,105
Oh!
98
00:04:21,228 --> 00:04:23,333
That kind of dream.
99
00:04:23,463 --> 00:04:24,806
Yes, that kind of dream,
100
00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:26,274
and I know
what you're going to say.
101
00:04:26,399 --> 00:04:27,969
That I like her, but I don't.
102
00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:30,240
When was the last time
you had...
103
00:04:30,370 --> 00:04:31,440
Eight months ago,
104
00:04:31,571 --> 00:04:33,482
not that it's
any of your business.
105
00:04:33,607 --> 00:04:35,416
Well, I was going to say,
106
00:04:35,542 --> 00:04:37,749
"When was the last time
you had a cigarette?"
107
00:04:37,878 --> 00:04:40,916
But that does explain
all the bad mornings.
108
00:04:41,047 --> 00:04:43,926
Um... I quit smoking
three weeks ago.
109
00:04:44,050 --> 00:04:46,894
My guess is you're probably
just craving nicotine
110
00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:49,933
and your-your mind is making you
think that it's something else.
111
00:04:50,056 --> 00:04:51,364
- You think so?
-Mm-hmm.
112
00:04:51,491 --> 00:04:54,199
Why don't you just go on
the patch? Maybe that'll help.
113
00:04:54,327 --> 00:04:56,273
No, no, I'll just tough it out.
114
00:04:56,396 --> 00:04:57,807
--Oh, come on, John.
115
00:04:57,931 --> 00:05:00,343
Why don't you for once
in your life do something easy,
116
00:05:00,467 --> 00:05:03,607
if not for you, then for those
of us who have to be around you?
117
00:05:03,737 --> 00:05:07,082
Come on, I know you got some
samples around here somewhere.
118
00:05:07,207 --> 00:05:09,050
--Linda, the phone!
119
00:05:09,176 --> 00:05:10,917
Oh, yeah, here's one.
Roll up your sleeve.
120
00:05:11,044 --> 00:05:12,421
--You know...
121
00:05:12,546 --> 00:05:15,527
- Margaret, I don't think I...
-Oh, come on! Give it a try.
122
00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:16,923
--It's free!
123
00:05:17,050 --> 00:05:18,825
Your favorite four-letter word.
124
00:05:20,253 --> 00:05:22,699
It's not my favorite,
but it's right up there.
125
00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:24,393
--Linda, answer
126
00:05:24,524 --> 00:05:25,662
the damn phone, will you?
127
00:05:25,792 --> 00:05:28,500
I can't. It could be
bad thing number three.
128
00:05:28,628 --> 00:05:32,405
Shocking. I have no idea
what she's talking about.
129
00:05:32,532 --> 00:05:34,978
Yes, Dr. John Becker here.
130
00:05:35,101 --> 00:05:36,637
All right, thanks very much.
131
00:05:36,770 --> 00:05:38,477
That's the lab.
Their fax machine broke.
132
00:05:38,605 --> 00:05:41,051
Run over and, uh, bring the test
results back, will you, please?
133
00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:42,812
Oh, no, no, I can't do that.
134
00:05:42,943 --> 00:05:45,822
What if I get to the lab
and no one's at the front desk?
135
00:05:45,946 --> 00:05:48,017
I'll have to walk into the back
to find somebody.
136
00:05:48,148 --> 00:05:49,354
Next thing I know, I walk into
137
00:05:49,482 --> 00:05:51,018
the wrong room,
the door slams shut,
138
00:05:51,151 --> 00:05:54,223
and I'm stuck in the freezer
with all the hearts.
139
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:57,426
Linda, if you don't want
to do it, just say so.
140
00:05:57,557 --> 00:06:00,003
Oh...
I didn't know I could do that.
141
00:06:00,126 --> 00:06:01,799
I don't want to do it.
142
00:06:07,968 --> 00:06:09,379
Hey, guys.
143
00:06:09,502 --> 00:06:10,742
- Hey, how's it going?
-Hey, John.
144
00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:13,374
Chris, can I get
some coffee, please?
145
00:06:13,506 --> 00:06:16,146
Just give me a second, honey,
I'll be right with you.
146
00:06:18,345 --> 00:06:19,824
What the hell was that about?
147
00:06:19,946 --> 00:06:21,584
What the hell
was what about?
148
00:06:23,617 --> 00:06:26,063
Uh... nothing, nothing.
149
00:06:26,186 --> 00:06:27,893
Just coffee, please.
150
00:06:28,021 --> 00:06:29,591
Ow!
151
00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:31,396
Everything I put in my mouth
just kills me.
152
00:06:31,524 --> 00:06:32,969
Becker, you're a doctor.
153
00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:34,868
Do me a favor, take a look
in here, will you?
154
00:06:34,995 --> 00:06:36,531
I'd rather die.
155
00:06:37,931 --> 00:06:39,239
Come on, Becker,
I got something in my mouth.
156
00:06:39,366 --> 00:06:41,243
I don't know if it's
a canker sore or an abscess,
157
00:06:41,368 --> 00:06:43,245
or maybe it's a boil.
158
00:06:43,370 --> 00:06:44,348
That's disgusting.
159
00:06:44,471 --> 00:06:47,077
- You want to feel it?
-No!
160
00:06:47,207 --> 00:06:48,686
Uh, John, as long as you're
giving free medical advice...
161
00:06:48,808 --> 00:06:50,446
Yeah, I-I-I'm not.
I'm trying to have lunch here.
162
00:06:50,577 --> 00:06:51,885
No, come on, this'll just
take a second.
163
00:06:52,012 --> 00:06:53,685
There's something
you got to look at.
164
00:06:53,813 --> 00:06:57,659
All right, I got this irritation
under my pants.
165
00:06:57,784 --> 00:06:59,422
Now, it's-it's right where
the waist band
166
00:06:59,552 --> 00:07:00,826
of my underwear hits my skin...
167
00:07:00,954 --> 00:07:02,627
Jake, I'm not looking
in your underwear.
168
00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:04,633
Well, I'm not
wearing underwear.
169
00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:06,431
It's too uncomfortable,
so if you could
170
00:07:06,559 --> 00:07:08,038
just take a look at it
real quick...
171
00:07:08,161 --> 00:07:09,401
Hey, you know, forget it!
172
00:07:09,529 --> 00:07:11,440
You know, on the off chance
my appetite comes back,
173
00:07:11,564 --> 00:07:12,941
can I have
a turkey sandwich, please?
174
00:07:13,066 --> 00:07:14,340
Unless, of course, you've got
175
00:07:14,467 --> 00:07:16,469
something that needs
medical attention, too.
176
00:07:16,603 --> 00:07:19,777
Well, now that you mention it,
my stomach's been feeling weird.
177
00:07:19,906 --> 00:07:22,250
It's not really an ache
as much as a dull pain.
178
00:07:22,375 --> 00:07:23,581
For God's sake, you know...
179
00:07:23,710 --> 00:07:25,917
I only have to care about people
when I'm at the office.
180
00:07:26,046 --> 00:07:27,150
Oh!
181
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:28,850
- I think it just burst!
182
00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:31,455
Make that sandwich to go.
183
00:07:31,584 --> 00:07:32,927
Oh, come on, Becker,
just eyeball this thing!
184
00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:34,623
Come on, John,
just reach into my pants.
185
00:07:34,754 --> 00:07:36,529
You don't have to look.
186
00:07:36,656 --> 00:07:37,862
J-Just give it a little feel.
187
00:07:37,991 --> 00:07:38,867
Aw, geez!
188
00:07:38,992 --> 00:07:40,300
Come on, guys, you heard him.
189
00:07:40,427 --> 00:07:41,929
He's on a break.
Leave him alone.
190
00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:43,097
Thank you.
191
00:07:43,229 --> 00:07:44,264
I mean, you work so hard,
192
00:07:44,397 --> 00:07:45,535
and everyone asks
so much of you.
193
00:07:45,665 --> 00:07:46,735
You're only one person.
194
00:07:46,866 --> 00:07:47,867
Doesn't anybody think
about your needs?
195
00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:49,981
- No, no, they don't.
-Yeah.
196
00:07:51,004 --> 00:07:53,211
You must be so stressed out.
197
00:07:53,340 --> 00:07:55,047
I wish I could take you away
198
00:07:55,175 --> 00:07:57,951
and show you how
to really relax.
199
00:07:58,078 --> 00:08:00,024
I bet that feels better.
200
00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:02,858
Huh?
201
00:08:02,983 --> 00:08:04,485
What did you just say?
202
00:08:04,617 --> 00:08:06,688
I said here's your sandwich.
203
00:08:08,421 --> 00:08:10,662
Oh. A lot of good that did.
204
00:08:23,803 --> 00:08:25,407
Who is it?
205
00:08:25,538 --> 00:08:27,245
It's Chris.
206
00:08:29,009 --> 00:08:30,989
Just a second.
207
00:08:35,949 --> 00:08:37,394
Hi. What's going on?
208
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:38,723
Sorry to bother you, John.
209
00:08:38,852 --> 00:08:40,388
No problem.
Everything all right?
210
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:43,501
Yeah, yeah, it's just that...
I was upstairs alone
211
00:08:43,623 --> 00:08:45,603
in my place thinking
that you're probably
212
00:08:45,725 --> 00:08:47,705
down here alone
in your place, and...
213
00:08:47,827 --> 00:08:48,703
And what?
214
00:08:48,828 --> 00:08:50,705
And I suddenly just felt like...
215
00:08:50,830 --> 00:08:52,366
Like what? Felt like what?
216
00:08:52,499 --> 00:08:54,843
Like I needed to do this.
217
00:08:59,272 --> 00:09:01,183
I don't know if this
is such a good idea.
218
00:09:01,307 --> 00:09:03,014
Shh.
219
00:09:08,181 --> 00:09:10,991
Oh, it's awfully hot in here.
220
00:09:11,117 --> 00:09:13,188
Oh, this... this is crazy.
221
00:09:13,319 --> 00:09:14,821
I got to wake up.
222
00:09:16,456 --> 00:09:18,367
Okay, in a minute.
223
00:09:20,527 --> 00:09:22,200
- My mouth hurts.
-Look in my pants.
224
00:09:22,328 --> 00:09:23,898
- Hey, I was here first.
-We came here together.
225
00:09:24,030 --> 00:09:26,032
- Help me! Help me! Help me!
-Help me! Help me!
226
00:09:26,166 --> 00:09:27,736
Help me!
227
00:09:40,713 --> 00:09:44,490
This cream the doctor
prescribed doesn't work!
228
00:09:44,617 --> 00:09:48,258
So nice to see you again,
Mrs. Weigand.
229
00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:50,994
Seems like you were
just here yesterday.
230
00:09:51,124 --> 00:09:53,968
Well, I was here yesterday,
and every other day this week.
231
00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:55,198
My rash came back!
232
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:57,035
Do you know
how annoying that is?
233
00:09:57,163 --> 00:09:59,109
Yes, I know how annoying it is
234
00:09:59,232 --> 00:10:00,768
when you think something
has gone away
235
00:10:00,900 --> 00:10:03,676
and it just keeps coming back
bothering you.
236
00:10:05,205 --> 00:10:07,082
Why don't you just go back
to room one.
237
00:10:07,207 --> 00:10:09,187
The doctor will be
with you in a moment.
238
00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:11,380
Well, I hope so.
Because I don't mind telling you
239
00:10:11,511 --> 00:10:14,583
that I have better things to do
than to come here day after day.
240
00:10:14,714 --> 00:10:16,421
It's a big pain in the ass!
241
00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:19,726
Yes, you are.
242
00:10:20,987 --> 00:10:22,660
I know I'm late,
243
00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:25,235
but I had to walk here
all the way from Manhattan.
244
00:10:25,358 --> 00:10:26,359
Oh, please don't tell me
245
00:10:26,493 --> 00:10:28,268
that this is about
that silly superstition.
246
00:10:28,394 --> 00:10:30,499
It's not a superstition.
It's real.
247
00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:31,904
Bad luck comes in threes.
248
00:10:32,031 --> 00:10:33,510
Look it up in the dictionary.
249
00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:34,771
Under what?
250
00:10:34,901 --> 00:10:38,041
Under all those
other books over there.
251
00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:41,311
Wait. So, you walked here?
252
00:10:41,441 --> 00:10:44,285
Well, I couldn't very well
take public transportation.
253
00:10:44,410 --> 00:10:48,085
Buses collide, trains crash,
bridges collapse.
254
00:10:48,214 --> 00:10:50,854
So, instead, you thought
it was safer to walk through
255
00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:53,260
some of the most dangerous
neighborhoods in New York?
256
00:10:53,386 --> 00:10:56,390
Well, I couldn't very well
run in these heels.
257
00:10:56,523 --> 00:10:57,797
Oh, God, help me.
258
00:10:57,924 --> 00:11:00,871
Just take Mr. Maggie back
to room two and get his vitals.
259
00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:02,371
I don't think so.
260
00:11:03,396 --> 00:11:05,637
Now, how could that
be dangerous?
261
00:11:05,765 --> 00:11:07,039
Mr. Maggie's cute.
262
00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,976
So am I. He'd ask me out.
263
00:11:09,102 --> 00:11:10,843
But then he'd end up
breaking my heart.
264
00:11:10,970 --> 00:11:12,847
Then I'd grow old and bitter
and die alone
265
00:11:12,972 --> 00:11:14,508
in an apartment full of cats.
266
00:11:14,641 --> 00:11:16,780
And as you know,
I'm allergic to cats.
267
00:11:18,077 --> 00:11:19,681
Okay, okay, enough.
268
00:11:19,812 --> 00:11:22,292
This whole thing
has just gone far enough.
269
00:11:22,415 --> 00:11:24,258
I mean, look how
this is upsetting you.
270
00:11:24,384 --> 00:11:27,627
You are pale, you are shaking,
and-and you're breaking out.
271
00:11:27,754 --> 00:11:29,495
I'm what?
272
00:11:29,622 --> 00:11:31,966
It's a pimple.
273
00:11:32,091 --> 00:11:34,628
Margaret, I have a pimple.
274
00:11:34,761 --> 00:11:36,707
- So?
-So, that's fantastic.
275
00:11:36,829 --> 00:11:39,742
That's bad thing number three.
It's over.
276
00:11:39,866 --> 00:11:43,643
Oh, this is gonna be huge!
277
00:11:43,770 --> 00:11:46,080
I am so happy fOI' YOU-
278
00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:50,416
Now will you please take
Mr. Maggie back to room two?
279
00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:53,422
And let him see me like this?
I don't think so.
280
00:11:57,350 --> 00:12:00,456
The bad news is Mrs. Weigand
is in room one.
281
00:12:00,587 --> 00:12:02,032
Her rash is back.
282
00:12:02,155 --> 00:12:03,634
It's red and irritating.
283
00:12:03,756 --> 00:12:05,292
That is also the good news.
284
00:12:05,425 --> 00:12:08,872
Now, I know that's not nice,
but I hate her.
285
00:12:08,995 --> 00:12:12,340
Margaret, I don't treat
Mrs. Weigand because I like her.
286
00:12:12,465 --> 00:12:15,742
I treat her because
she has great insurance.
287
00:12:15,868 --> 00:12:18,405
- Dr. Becker!
- Oh, brother.
288
00:12:18,538 --> 00:12:20,176
You look tired.
Are you all right?
289
00:12:20,306 --> 00:12:22,547
Oh, yeah, I'm just not
getting enough sleep.
290
00:12:22,675 --> 00:12:24,518
I'm still having
those stupid dreams.
291
00:12:24,644 --> 00:12:26,646
- Even with the patch?
-Oh, it didn't help.
292
00:12:26,779 --> 00:12:28,918
It has nothing to do
with nicotine anyway.
293
00:12:29,048 --> 00:12:32,052
Obviously, I still have
feelings for Chris.
294
00:12:32,185 --> 00:12:34,222
Well, then, why don't you
talk to her about it?
295
00:12:34,354 --> 00:12:35,856
Talk's not going to do any good.
296
00:12:35,989 --> 00:12:37,525
She doesn't feel the same way.
297
00:12:37,657 --> 00:12:39,193
I'm just gonna have to move on.
298
00:12:39,325 --> 00:12:40,429
It's as simple as that.
299
00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:42,369
Dr. Becker?!
300
00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:44,065
I know just how you feel.
301
00:12:44,197 --> 00:12:45,505
When I was in nursing school,
302
00:12:45,632 --> 00:12:47,111
I had some pretty intense
feelings
303
00:12:47,233 --> 00:12:48,837
for a nurse in my class.
304
00:12:48,968 --> 00:12:50,879
Margaret, I had no idea you...
305
00:12:51,004 --> 00:12:53,006
A male nurse.
306
00:12:54,641 --> 00:12:57,417
Dr. Becker, I'm waiting!
307
00:12:57,543 --> 00:12:59,318
Oh, Walter was so great.
308
00:12:59,445 --> 00:13:01,982
Oh, he was smart,
handsome, funny.
309
00:13:02,115 --> 00:13:04,186
We used to practice taking
each other's blood pressure,
310
00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:06,297
and when he would take mine,
I swear, it would just shoot
311
00:13:06,419 --> 00:13:07,955
right through the roof.
312
00:13:08,087 --> 00:13:10,397
But the problem was,
he didn't feel the same way.
313
00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:14,198
ls anybody gonna help me?!
314
00:13:14,327 --> 00:13:15,931
Excuse me.
315
00:13:20,266 --> 00:13:24,237
So, how long did it take you to
get over this-this Walter guy?
316
00:13:24,370 --> 00:13:26,907
If I ever do, I'll let you know.
317
00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:28,644
Well, that's a horrible story.
318
00:13:28,775 --> 00:13:30,584
How's that supposed
to make me feel better?
319
00:13:30,710 --> 00:13:33,122
Dr. Becker,
where the hell are you?!
320
00:13:33,246 --> 00:13:34,623
Lord, have mercy.
321
00:13:34,747 --> 00:13:38,160
The point is,
unrequited love is a bitch.
322
00:13:38,284 --> 00:13:40,321
And so is Mrs. Weigand.
323
00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:49,129
Hey, Jake. Chris here?
324
00:13:49,262 --> 00:13:50,707
Uh, no,
she went to the drugstore
325
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,503
to get something
for her stomach.
326
00:13:52,632 --> 00:13:54,168
Good.
327
00:13:54,300 --> 00:13:56,644
"Good" meaning you're happy
she's not feeling well?
328
00:13:56,769 --> 00:13:58,840
No, "good"--just, I don't want
to see her right now.
329
00:13:58,971 --> 00:14:01,008
Oh, is there something going on
between you two?
330
00:14:01,140 --> 00:14:03,416
Well, you know,
keep it to yourself.
331
00:14:03,543 --> 00:14:05,216
But I-l...
332
00:14:05,345 --> 00:14:07,484
I keep having this dream
about Chris.
333
00:14:07,613 --> 00:14:09,752
What, you mean
that kind of dream?
334
00:14:09,882 --> 00:14:11,156
Wh-Why does everybody
ask me that?
335
00:14:11,284 --> 00:14:13,025
Do you think I'd be upset
if I had a dream
336
00:14:13,152 --> 00:14:15,029
where Chris and I were
at Macy's shopping for luggage?
337
00:14:15,154 --> 00:14:16,997
- Of course, one of those dreams.
-All right, all right.
338
00:14:17,123 --> 00:14:19,000
Take it easy. I'm just trying
to make sure here.
339
00:14:19,125 --> 00:14:20,832
- Well, pay attention, then.
-Okay.
340
00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:24,464
In the dream, she comes to my
apartment, and we start kissing,
341
00:14:24,597 --> 00:14:26,235
and there's some groping.
342
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,676
It's awful. I mean,
what do you think it means?
343
00:14:28,801 --> 00:14:30,303
Well, if it's awful,
it means you're gay.
344
00:14:30,436 --> 00:14:31,881
No...
345
00:14:32,004 --> 00:14:34,382
No, no, it's awful because
if I'm dreaming about her,
346
00:14:34,507 --> 00:14:35,781
it means I still like her.
347
00:14:35,908 --> 00:14:37,478
And she doesn't
feel the same way.
348
00:14:37,610 --> 00:14:38,987
Well, what are you
going to do about it?
349
00:14:39,112 --> 00:14:40,750
Th-There's nothing I can do.
350
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,621
It's just like Walter, you know.
351
00:14:42,749 --> 00:14:45,161
I'm going to be obsessing
for the next 25 years.
352
00:14:45,284 --> 00:14:46,194
Who's Walter?
353
00:14:46,319 --> 00:14:47,992
A nurse.
354
00:14:48,121 --> 00:14:49,794
Excuse me?
355
00:14:49,922 --> 00:14:50,832
It's a long story.
356
00:14:50,957 --> 00:14:52,561
I hope so.
357
00:14:53,826 --> 00:14:54,804
Hey, guys. What's up?
358
00:14:54,927 --> 00:14:56,372
- Oh, nothing.
-Nothing.
359
00:14:56,496 --> 00:14:58,772
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
What was that about?
360
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:00,241
The minute I walked in here,
you guys stopped talking.
361
00:15:00,366 --> 00:15:01,242
Were you talking about me?
362
00:15:01,367 --> 00:15:02,277
- No.
-No.
363
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:03,506
Well, what were you
talking about?
364
00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:04,740
- Weather.
-Baseball.
365
00:15:04,871 --> 00:15:06,441
Baseball weather.
366
00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:08,711
Wait a minute, so it is me.
367
00:15:08,841 --> 00:15:10,843
What is it, my cologne?
My leather jacket?
368
00:15:10,977 --> 00:15:13,048
My Cabbage Patch dolls?
369
00:15:14,147 --> 00:15:15,217
Excuse me?
370
00:15:15,348 --> 00:15:17,385
What, they're
a good investment, okay?
371
00:15:17,517 --> 00:15:20,521
And they have names, so you
can't just throw them out.
372
00:15:20,653 --> 00:15:22,564
Come on, we don't keep secrets.
We're friends.
373
00:15:22,688 --> 00:15:24,167
No one's going
to judge you, right?
374
00:15:24,290 --> 00:15:26,497
Okay, okay, well, John's having
dreams about Chris.
375
00:15:26,626 --> 00:15:27,627
Loser .
376
00:15:29,562 --> 00:15:31,337
Why don't you quit banging
your head against the wall?
377
00:15:31,464 --> 00:15:32,568
The woman's made it
perfectly clear
378
00:15:32,698 --> 00:15:34,302
that she wants absolutely
nothing to do with you.
379
00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:36,505
So why don't you just take
the hint and get over her.
380
00:15:36,636 --> 00:15:38,081
Why don't you mind
your own business?
381
00:15:38,204 --> 00:15:39,706
I can do that. Or...
382
00:15:39,839 --> 00:15:41,682
I can give you some advice
and help you out.
383
00:15:41,808 --> 00:15:43,515
Oh, yeah, I'm gonna
take advice from you?
384
00:15:43,643 --> 00:15:45,645
Uh, you know, when it comes
to women not liking you,
385
00:15:45,778 --> 00:15:47,485
who knows better than Bob?
386
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:51,725
All right... what do you
think I should do?
387
00:15:51,851 --> 00:15:53,091
Simple.
388
00:15:53,219 --> 00:15:55,165
Every woman has a certain
something special about her
389
00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:56,323
that's disgusting.
390
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:58,060
All you have to do is find out
391
00:15:58,191 --> 00:15:59,864
what that is
and obsess about it.
392
00:15:59,992 --> 00:16:01,630
I mean, the way she talks,
walks, eats.
393
00:16:01,761 --> 00:16:05,732
Does she have a club foot,
a hump, a walleye, a mono-brow,
394
00:16:05,865 --> 00:16:07,742
maybe even a hairy birthmark.
395
00:16:07,867 --> 00:16:10,177
Whatever it is,
just blow it out of proportion
396
00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:12,283
until that's all she is to you.
397
00:16:12,405 --> 00:16:15,284
What else you got, you idiot?
398
00:16:15,408 --> 00:16:18,412
Well, you can always try
and find her mother and see
399
00:16:18,544 --> 00:16:20,319
-if she's got a big ass.
-What?
400
00:16:20,446 --> 00:16:22,289
Well, you know, that way, you'll
know if you dodged a bullet.
401
00:16:22,415 --> 00:16:24,952
Yeah, but what... what if
her mother's got a great ass?
402
00:16:25,084 --> 00:16:26,427
Then you hit on the mother.
What do you want from me?
403
00:16:26,552 --> 00:16:28,225
Go. Just go, will you?
404
00:16:28,354 --> 00:16:29,856
All right, look,
you-you want to get rid
405
00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:31,764
of every feeling
you've ever had for her?
406
00:16:31,891 --> 00:16:33,598
Marry her.
407
00:16:33,726 --> 00:16:34,830
Loser .
408
00:16:37,096 --> 00:16:38,632
Well, you-you could go
Bob's way,
409
00:16:38,764 --> 00:16:41,108
take a trip to Buffalo
and size up her mom's ass,
410
00:16:41,234 --> 00:16:44,340
or-- and I know this
may sound crazy--
411
00:16:44,470 --> 00:16:46,279
you could just tell her
how you feel.
412
00:16:46,405 --> 00:16:48,510
I can't tell her
the truth, Jake.
413
00:16:48,641 --> 00:16:50,518
No, Bob's right--
I've been down that road,
414
00:16:50,643 --> 00:16:52,213
and it leads to very bad things.
415
00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:54,325
I don't want to be
humiliated again.
416
00:16:54,447 --> 00:16:56,290
Yeah, but what if she has
the same feelings for you?
417
00:16:56,415 --> 00:16:58,156
Well, then she's just gonna have
to put herself out there.
418
00:16:58,284 --> 00:17:00,286
She's gonna have to tell me.
419
00:17:00,419 --> 00:17:01,489
That's never gonna happen.
420
00:17:01,621 --> 00:17:02,964
So I guess the next best thing
421
00:17:03,089 --> 00:17:05,626
is just to obsess over something
that I hate about her.
422
00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:06,930
Like what?
423
00:17:08,728 --> 00:17:11,265
That's the problem--
I can't think of anything.
424
00:17:21,841 --> 00:17:23,616
Oh, no.
425
00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:33,060
Oh, no.
426
00:17:35,254 --> 00:17:36,824
Hi.
427
00:17:36,956 --> 00:17:38,560
I'm sorry to bother you,
428
00:17:38,691 --> 00:17:41,194
but I was upstairs
and you're down here,
429
00:17:41,327 --> 00:17:43,432
and I just started
to have these feelings.
430
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,201
Yeah, what kind of feelings?
431
00:17:45,331 --> 00:17:47,174
- I just...
-What?
432
00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:48,210
I just feel like...
433
00:17:48,334 --> 00:17:49,210
What?
434
00:17:49,335 --> 00:17:51,542
I just feel like I need to...
435
00:17:58,778 --> 00:18:02,089
Oh, sure, yeah, yeah,
this time it had to be real.
436
00:18:15,194 --> 00:18:16,298
I'm sorry, John.
437
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:17,373
What are you talking about?
438
00:18:17,496 --> 00:18:18,941
What do you have
to be sorry for?
439
00:18:19,065 --> 00:18:20,271
Your carpet.
440
00:18:20,399 --> 00:18:22,242
Oh, I'll have it cleaned.
Yeah.
441
00:18:22,368 --> 00:18:24,177
And don't you worry
about the bill...
442
00:18:24,303 --> 00:18:25,907
till you're feeling better.
443
00:18:26,038 --> 00:18:29,918
Anyway, you know, it's me
who should be apologizing here.
444
00:18:30,042 --> 00:18:32,079
I mean, you told me your
stomach hurt two days ago.
445
00:18:32,211 --> 00:18:33,781
I didn't take it seriously.
446
00:18:33,913 --> 00:18:35,722
Wh-Why didn't you tell me
it was this bad?
447
00:18:35,848 --> 00:18:37,384
I thought it would get better.
448
00:18:37,516 --> 00:18:39,996
Yeah, well, appendicitis
doesn't get better on its own.
449
00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:41,621
I can't believe
you've been walking around
450
00:18:41,754 --> 00:18:42,960
in this kind of pain.
451
00:18:43,990 --> 00:18:45,526
Am I going to be okay?
452
00:18:45,658 --> 00:18:46,636
Oh, sure, you are.
453
00:18:46,759 --> 00:18:49,763
This is just a very routine
operation.
454
00:18:49,895 --> 00:18:52,375
I'm going to be with you
every minute. I promise.
455
00:18:54,867 --> 00:18:56,540
- You're shivering.
-I know.
456
00:18:56,669 --> 00:18:57,739
I asked them
to give me a blanket.
457
00:18:57,870 --> 00:18:58,780
- I don't know what happened.
-Well, you know what?
458
00:18:58,904 --> 00:19:00,440
I'll get you one.
I'm a doctor.
459
00:19:00,573 --> 00:19:01,643
You know, there's a trick about
460
00:19:01,774 --> 00:19:03,048
getting what you want
in a hospital.
461
00:19:07,747 --> 00:19:09,784
What the hell are you doing?
462
00:19:09,915 --> 00:19:12,225
Oh, sorry, I thought you
were asleep, pal.
463
00:19:15,721 --> 00:19:16,927
And how are we feeling?
464
00:19:17,056 --> 00:19:19,434
I don't know about you,
but I feel like crap.
465
00:19:19,558 --> 00:19:21,333
Well, this will help
with the pain.
466
00:19:21,460 --> 00:19:25,135
It's Demerol, and it takes
effect almost immediately.
467
00:19:25,264 --> 00:19:27,005
- Oh, thanks.
-You're welcome.
468
00:19:27,133 --> 00:19:29,135
Okay, I'll be back soon.
469
00:19:29,268 --> 00:19:31,509
We're almost ready
to take you down.
470
00:19:37,043 --> 00:19:38,716
I told you I'd find one.
471
00:19:38,844 --> 00:19:40,687
Guy I took it from was cold.
472
00:19:40,813 --> 00:19:43,692
Take a lot more than a blanket
to warm him up.
473
00:19:48,921 --> 00:19:50,127
John?
474
00:19:50,256 --> 00:19:51,462
Yeah?
475
00:19:51,590 --> 00:19:53,570
What, are you going
to throw up again?
476
00:19:53,693 --> 00:19:55,229
- No.
-Oh.
477
00:19:56,262 --> 00:19:57,707
I love you.
478
00:19:59,398 --> 00:20:01,139
What'd you just say?
479
00:20:01,267 --> 00:20:03,440
I love you.
480
00:20:06,839 --> 00:20:08,045
Really?
481
00:20:09,775 --> 00:20:11,721
I never thought
I'd hear you say that.
482
00:20:11,844 --> 00:20:14,290
I mean, after all
we've been through, I...
483
00:20:14,413 --> 00:20:16,256
Oh, wow, you know, I...
484
00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:18,293
you know, I-l kind of feel...
485
00:20:18,417 --> 00:20:20,090
You know, I've been
thinking about you.
486
00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:21,755
I can't get you out of my mind.
487
00:20:21,887 --> 00:20:23,662
I've been dreaming about you.
488
00:20:23,789 --> 00:20:25,530
Well...
489
00:20:25,658 --> 00:20:29,902
I guess this means
I-I-I think I love you, too.
490
00:20:30,029 --> 00:20:31,474
No, I... I do.
491
00:20:31,597 --> 00:20:33,235
My God, I love you.
492
00:20:34,266 --> 00:20:35,574
Well...
493
00:20:35,701 --> 00:20:37,874
You know,
this is kind of a big deal.
494
00:20:38,003 --> 00:20:40,279
And how are we feeling?
495
00:20:41,340 --> 00:20:43,217
I love you.
496
00:20:46,645 --> 00:20:48,682
Ready to 9°'?
497
00:20:48,814 --> 00:20:50,452
I love you.
498
00:20:50,583 --> 00:20:52,563
I love you, too.
499
00:20:55,721 --> 00:20:57,792
I love you.
500
00:20:59,692 --> 00:21:02,434
One shot of Demerol,
they love everything.
501
00:21:04,196 --> 00:21:06,198
I love you.
502
00:21:11,437 --> 00:21:12,916
Loser .
36437
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