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In winter 2003, French heroine detox drug Subutex had displaced amfetamine as the most popular intravenous drug of Northern Finland
I was living in Rovaniemi without a job I lived on social welfare and used drugs almost daily
During that time I started to film the life of my social circle
This is a story of my friend Jani
Need to find some (Mazda) 323
If there is no here we can go around from there
Over here.
(Joonas, director:) ... Some guy ... Hey, did you hear?
(Joonas:) There's some people, did you hear? - I heard.
(Car alarm system.)
reindeerspotting ESCAPE FROM SANTALAND
(Jani:) No need to run anymore
Could you help me now please?
I have here sort of car stereo.
Brand is Sony. Wait, I read (the details).
Xplod 4 x 50 W CDX-4000RX.
This is hell of a good Sony car stereo.
Then I would also have money with it
Oh, damn.
Well could you still ask, even if half a dose (puokki) could be found?
You wouldn't happen to be able to help me?
I would only need just one (dose).
(Hurtsi:) You should have fucking taken everything at once, but.
(Jani:) I only took half (a pill/dose), So I can finish it during night.
Do you think that these won't work? Fucking sure these will work.
I can swear on my head for that
(Hurtsi:) I did not say that. - Not then.
(Hurtsi:) There is not enough. - Yes, there is.
I took the same at Jonas' place
Initially it seemed, that there is no effect
but then all of a sudden it kinda wakes you up
Take it. Try it. (Hurtsi:) I don't want to.
Well, do not have to then. (Hurtsi:) Just use all for yourself
Morning. (showing a condom packet)
I just say that is fucking awesome to fuck someone on speed
When you have a girl going down on you, so that it starts to get hard a bit -
so you bang her at least three hours nonstop
Fucking really with full power
The girl that kind of rides, that she has never received before.
(Finnish rap music)
We continue the trip ...
Fuck off you bitches
I have in fact that kind of asshole radar
With you it starts alarm red
Luckily there comes a time for you to punish
So police officers, rolling slowly on the parking lot
checking out register plates
Clouds and those castles made of stone
Spending lonely nights in jails
The active ingredient of Subutex is buprenorphine. Like heroine and morphine it produces a pleasant and euphoric feeling
(Jani:) I started to use drugs when I was 14 years. old.
About 5 years of drug use and soon I will turn 20 years.
Since then I've been taking those (notkuja) drugs.
Subutex and Temgesic.
Rovaniemi has been an amphetamine (piri) city fucking long already.
But drugs came here kinda late -
but surely, anyway.
We are spending a relaxing night among friend with good food and Subutex
(Jani:) Hey, Hurtsi. How much of S you have there?
(Hurtsi:) Yeah I have some.
I was thinking if I would have bought half a S from you.
- Would it be okay for you? - I wouldn't really want to sell.
Sell!
(Jani:) Do not touch with wet hands Look at it now.
(Hurtsi:) Well. Do you have the money?
(Jani:) No shit, what a guy dude. Asking me this amount of..
(Jani:) You have to get profit from a friend. Well it does not matter, fuck.
Fuck what kind of guy that Hurtsi.
Ask 30� from me (for half) after paying 50� a chip himself
(Jani:) Is the Dr. Dre the bad guy here? - No. He is the boss here.
Dre is a good man here.
He is a good man here, Dr. Dre here.
Eminem is a crazy gun nut / nutcase here.
(Hurtsi:) Snoopy is just smoking, fuck. And lounging
Well it is just the right thing for Snoopy, fuck (vittu).
Enimem is fuck th best white rapper in the world.
Of course after me even though I cannot rap at all
So what, you are asking for 30� for the half S?
Yeah.
Hohhoi, fuck. What a dude
Fuck, whooo, what a friend.
- I also can be irritating sometimes - Yeah, "sometimes".
Fuck, yeah. Fuck, all the time, satan.
"All the time, "the fuck?
Take care of the shit as they are supposed to be taken care of.
That is what I have done, satan.
Fucking idiot, bloody hell.
Fuck, dares to ask from me... Well, it does not matter, fuck.
Due to a "misunderstanding" after a failed job 2 fingers were cut from Jani with an axe
He plans to move away from Rovaniemi
(Jani:) It is all about your psych� how you take your existence here
If you just go to your flat doing nothing and you do not not eat and thus, -
and constantly thinks that, fuck, I am feeling bad, I am feeling bad -
Of course you feel bad.
When you try to be among the living and eat, and so on -
then you can cope somehow.
And you are forced to cope.
Rovaniemi, This is this kind of fucking little city (tuppukyl�), fuck.
In winter, a lot of snow fuck, and in the summer fucking cold.
What else can you really tell about Rovaniemi?
Here, you have spent your life, -
Months and years just flashing in your eyes.
Yet, they pass fucking slowly.
This is that sort of a place from where you constantly want to leave from
If you've never visited -
and lived anywhere else than in Rovaniemi, then fucking hell!
I wouldn't at least have the energy for that
It would be the same as shooting a bullet in the head or something.
This is just too distant.
I would like get into the center of things and activities.
In principle ...
... Eye of the storm.
Due to the raids of the narcotic police Subutex has temporarily run out from the city
Withdrawal symptoms come
Luckily there is a legal alternative: Pams (diazepam) and alcohol
(Hurtsi:) I have lost gloves.
Jou, jou, jou...
(Hurtsi:) What is my hat?
Now it is like starting.. the partying
Hurtsi, How much of the diazepams you still have?
- If you could like lend me 5? - Fuck you!
Was that a direct response or indirect? (Hurtsi:) Think about it.
Well see what the evening brings.
(Announcer :)... Whether Lapin Kansa was faster than Santa Claus this time?
Vili, and then against Lepsu.
Now that is very tight couple.
Huhhahhei and bottle of rum! But only after work, thank you.
What the fuck is there to see in reindeers?
We checked whether the guy would have wallets...
Oh, fuck.
Oh, my God!
He fell down?
Hey, from where the reindeers start?
(Announcer:) A middle-aged, educated gentleman -
is in the army for 24 months.
Think about the neighbor boy from the east (Russia).
He goes to the army, and he never gets back to civilian life.
Now it is tight race.
Now, hard to tell the winner, but soon it will be announced.
Indeed, there is Veikka with the information Information finale ...
(Jani's friends are singing Pelle Miljoona's song [Moottoritie on Kuuma]:)
I would like to explain but the ships wait
You are a dream to me but the world is true
But the world is true
(Ismo Alanko: An artist's life.) Cocaine, LSD, Ecstasy, yep
Always fresh Koskenkorva tastes as a snack
Too much, just a bit too much I eat mushrooms
Too much, just a bit too much I calm down with pills
Every night, when too much I fell in love
Life of an artist, Me, Melleri and Morrison
(Jupe:) You!
(Jani:) What?
What did he say?
Call in ten minutes!
I heard today that you have called me a homerobber!
Nonsense. We settled this yesterday, when I was here.
We agreed that it is settled. - I heard about it today.
So from whom? - What fucking difference it is from whom I heard it from?
Fuck him, who is saying those things
Why in the fuck have you said such thing?
Well you could have stolen all my stuff if you'd have wanted to.
Well you blamed me. That I would had used your drugs (t��tit) as well. satan.
Haven't we already talked about this? - Yeah.
So why do you blame a homerobber? - I do not blame you.
You have accused me as a homerobber. - I do not accuse you as such.
You have accused! - What is coming from my mouth?: "I don't accuse".
Just to piss you off.
I don't have the energy for this. - You have accused me to be a homerobber.
(Jani:) Fuck believe, fuck, who you believe, satan.
Hey, if Joni told that to me ...
You heard me? - I heard you.
I have fuck, in a fit of anger, fuck -
might have said, when the drugs had disappeared.
But I did not mean it. We settled this yesterday evening?
I did not know yesterday evening -
that you had called me a homerobber.
I might have said in a fit of anger -
when the drugs (t��tit) disappeared.
But I don't mean that really.
I'll trust you 100%, fuck.
And still accuse me of being a homerobber.
Fuck, if that is your decision, we are out of here.
I have not called anyone a homerobber.
You have.
In a fit of anger I might have said -
but we settled this yesterday. - I just heard it.
I've said it when fuck, -
when I was equally furious as I going to be soon fuck.
I'm getting pissed of this as well. - Do you think that I am not pissed off because of this?
You have accused me of being a homerobber. I thought of you as a my mate.
I do not think you as homerobber fuck. I really do not.
Well, why do you say that then? - I might have said, in a fit of anger.
You can also in a fit of anger say -
if you get angry at me, fuck I will kill that Raappana.
But in the end you do not mean it.
I've never said anything even close to that - But you might. It is a metaphor.
In similar fashion I might have said, -
That fuck, satan, Jupe, is a homerobber, perkele!
But still I haven't really meant it.
Okay. - It was a misunderstanding.
Really if I hear that kind of matter ...
You do not really hear that. You are one of the three here that I trust on.
But if I once again hear...
I guarantee that you will lose rest of your fingers also.
Joni doesn't have anything to drink.
Where is Joni? - At Vilsu's place.
Where does Vilsu live? - There where the Kansankatu's Neste is (gas station).
I go and get it.
You ain't go going anywhere with a car - I have a stolen car out there
You are not going anywhere with a car! - I drove it here just a while ago.
Despite that! - I am in good condition
You are not going to drive!
I'll go drive a car.
I go and do some fucking crazy job
Burglary to a storage of an industrial area fails when the cops arrive to the place
POLICE
Jani is being arrested for 3 days.
Three days of controversy.
Let's go somewhere for a cup of coffee.
(Hurtsi:) Jack, give me one Subutex (teemu) - I lost the laptop.
I ain't giving as I only have that one - Oh, fuck, you promised earlier.
I said that if you had not taken any, I could offered you one.
But you already had taken one - Yeah, but I was so sick yesterday.
I knew you that if I could keep a cool face
I would be out there in 3 days.
And I would even have Subutex (teemuja) waiting for me.
That there is nothing to worry about here.
They can keep me arrested for 3 days and not a day longer
(Joonas:) And you denied everything? - I admitted the attempt of theft.
However the limit of grand theft was passed, -
when the guy got loose and got the goods with him
It was not completely useless thing as I benefited about 1000� from that.
(Joonas:) Good one.
On that station you have to be quiet always, when you are there
After the first hearing report -
I just said that: "Nothing to add nor to nothing to tell."
(Police) "You take that line?" Jani: I take this line, fuck.
Today the examiner was changed.
Initially it was Jani P��kk�nen, who changed to Risto Turunen.
Turunen said: "Raappana. Name the other guy now."
"Together it is done and together it is suffered"
It does not really work so, it is kinda tacit agreement
If someone gets caught, he will take the blame.
Now, it happened to be me.
Fuck, loyalty to the another guy
Here you keep your mouth shut.
Nothing much else about it
To control the Subutex problem, the addicts are offered a free sedative medication
(Jani:) Could you give water or something?
Or will these go with tea?
They are not needed, satan, to be put down with anything.
Just on top of the tongue to saviour the flavour.
(Joonas:) Nami Nami (Yummy yummy).
They go down like that if you haven't got them for some while
Ten pills in the mouth at the same time and suck.
Pam (Diapam, diazepam) is the best tasting medicine, that I know.
Yeah, if you start comparing the different tastes.
Well, no, Rivatril is better. Fuck, it is number one.
Rivas are fucking good.
They will leave a taste which is a mixture of liquorice and ... mint.
Like you would have eaten a candy.
(Joonas:) I think the best are Tenox (temazepam) pills.
They taste like chalk tablets. (Joonas:) No, they taste like sweets.
Just try Rivatril. Riva is fucking good.
Yes, but there is the chalk flavor in Tenox which I do not like that much.
Oh, and then it gets all mushy in your mouth.
Pams dissolve nicely, like layer by layer.
All the time that kind of hard chunk.
At the department (hospital?) the people wonder -
when I am so spaced out in the morning - that what I am really taking.
I guess I'm a bit spaced out, when I take 40 mg of Tenox (temazepam) -
200 mg Sparine (promazine) and fuck what all else.
And I still cannot sleep. So I guess I am a bit spaced out in the morning
Fuck, that annoyed me. (Hurtsi:) Sparine makes you quite spaced out.
And when you're not sleeping -
even though you are on such drugs, that even an apartment building should fall.
Eyes just are gaping open.
Sick, fuck. (Joonas:) Why could not you sleep?
The withdrawal symptoms were so strong. I was just unable to sleep.
Court house
Prosecutor have demanded for a prison sentence to Jani. He is waiting for the court solution.
Drunken driving and Endangering traffic -
a couple of thefts, drug crimes drug use crimes -
and more of the shit. Bit of everything.
If I would go to prison now, I would go to Oulu.
In Pelso Prison you would have to work. And if you do not, then cell door is closed.
Oulu: that is like a rest home.
A lot of go just to spend their winter there, -
when you get shelter for the winter and regular food.
To go there to sit a bit. (to sit = do their time in Finnish)
(Jani:) The family is still the dearest to me.
It is pretty much the only sacred thing in my life.
Where other people can not reach. And to where they have no business.
They do not know anything about that.
But it is irritating for my mom to be here, if...
she has that kind of weigth over here, so it's not good.
Those older people have the habit -
of blaming themselves for their children's mistakes.
I started stealing fucking young.
Now, I have become quite of master in it.
As a kid you only stole candy or something like that.
It was quite stupid back then
When you started to proper thefts, you did not think of the money -
but the excitement and feeling what you will get from it.
Adrenaline rush of its own kind. (graffiti on the wall: your senses have opened)
Useless to think about it anymore. You have chosen your lifestyle
I just hope to get on a trip fast. I just want to get out from here.
As fast as possible.
But I should get some money.
That is the problem.
(Alert:) Solution at Hall 2
What ... (Joonas:) What is the situation there?
They sentenced me to jail.
(Joonas:) What? - Sentence to jail.
District court sentences Jani to jail for a year. The sentence will be put in order in summer.
- Whassup, whassup? - Let's go and do (iv) drugs (t��tit).
Ah drugs? Then I get the fuck out from this gang.
(Jani -> buddy:) Could you borrow me 50�?
At the moment I do not have a penny of money.
The money that I will receive will go all to those costs/charges.
(Jani's buddy:) This is running very well!
Well it is 2 gig PC.
What game is that? - Night Fire, James Bond.
Fuck, the phone rings.
Fuck the debts are putting pressure on me.
I should quickly get 60� from somewhere.
(Ahi:) How can I live -
if the Social Welfare Office gives me 80�? I can't life with that
I do not start to live with my woman's money, that is a sure thing.
Oh, What will I do?
If I mean to live, I then have to steal.
That is where it goes again that I am in prison again, thank to you.
(Jani:) You cannot blame anyone for that.
(Jani.) You wanted to get a break from every day life, in principle.
When you discovered your own thing, it was fucking awesome.
If you take Subutex, initially, very first times -
you get into that kind of state of trance.
You can travel anywhere in your mind
And when daydreaming (lucid dreams), you see just what you want to see.
You are awake, but still you are like sleeping.
You dream while you are awake.
It is fucking awesome.
To your whole body, you get that kind of fucking good feeling.
I cannot, satan, explain. It is just, fuck ...
But now, in the long run you are not noticing them anymore.
I was at once addicted to morphine as well.
When you took it for a couple of days, -
then suddenly you had been taking it one week and two weeks.
Mind was all flat. You weren't thinking anything at all.
It was, fuck, so evil a substance, that you will die to it.
At least to it if not to anything else
During the spring the use of drugs is increasing Jani's debt. He tries to get some money.
The date of jail time is getting closer day by day.
Howdy ho!
The one syringe ...
Another thing is whether they are mine.
Hey, now I got a murky flashback.
Fuck, it is quite sticky. Yuck.
Party, party.
When you draw through the filter, so the chalk does not come there.
That is why today I draw my Subutex and other IV drugs through a filter.
Chalk is fucking bad for your blood vessels and your eyes.
You might start too to see kind of blurry.
Do you still get returns from it?
This is, fuck, a dream place.
Well, and still a second round.
That certainly all the shit has been used.
Hey, everybody! It's a nice day today!
It's a shining day, and summer's coming.
Yeah.
You have a car, right? - Yeah.
You have syringes+needles? - No we have none.
Are you under Pams (sedatives)? - No ...
I have stayed up whole the last night, taking amphetamine.
2.5 grams of amphetamine.
Took amphetamine all night long.
Now Mika went back over there.
(Joonas:) Oh, back to jail? - Yeah.
(Joonas:) How long has he left? He sits how long of his sentence?
Can you give me the phone, I will call to Kymis?
Everyone owes me money.
- I soon start to beat up people. - I do not owe you any money.
Then they, fuck, are crying to me: "we do not get money from anywhere".
Now would be sitution when if we had the bazooka. (Joonas:) What?
If we had the bazooka, -
it would happen as we talked about yesterday.
... Pay me the debt in cash. - Yes, but to me you could not.
Let's go to the drugstore.
Family package of syringes and 20 ...
(Joonas:) What? - Cups, which I can use it with a filter to draw that Subutex.
No.
Is someone watching me?
Is someone watching me? (Joonas:) Yes.
(Joonas:) Now.
Family package of syringes. And 20 that kind of cups.
Or give just 10 in matter of fact.
Need syringes and needles? - Yeah, five both of them.
To the whole family. To father, mother and to three children.
And a small bag for them, thank you.
- 2.70�. - 2.70�? Well then it is even.
Thank you. There you go. Need a receipt? - Not needed, I go to use drugs.
Can you hold that? Fuck.
Calm driving style, we are not in a rush to anywhere.
(Joonas:) What? - I said to Jani.
Jani perhaps should drive a bit more calmly.
We are seriously not in a rush to anywhere.
(Jani:) It is quieter? (Joonas:) What?
Calmer than this? (Joonas:) Just normally. (shout)
(Joonas:) Well that is what I meant.
I am driving, fuck, as usual.
Reflexes were in order, so the bitch survived.
(Jani:) It is all about your psych� how you take your existence here
You cannot end your use here.
All your friends use -
and if you're a a while without drugs then someone will offer you.
And when you ask yourself, it is sure that you will not be offered.
The people here are so crooked/twisted that the fucking hell ...
You cannot distinguish friend from your enemy.
The next day he can be your enemy.
I guess you become like that as well as the others.
I do not know -
whether or not my friends have gone, fuck, anywhere outside this city.
They are trying to get out from here, it is evident.
And a big part people have gone.
But they won't leave as I would leave.
They still will stay in Finland.
But I wouldn't be able even to stay in Finland.
Two weeks later Jani calls and says: "Pack your stuff, we leave in an hour"
I have been waiting fucking long for this moment.
Yesterday I succeeded in sort of thing that I comment on here -
But that can I say that
But we can get going!
I am feeling so good, aren't you also??
Fucking awesome! Throw a couple of Pams to your face to relieve a bit your tension.
Or Rivatril. Take one Pam. (Joonas:) I'll take couple of lines.
You fuck head.
Today we are in Finland. Tomorrow we are in Paris.
Jani has managed to steal 5'000� from the safe of a local supermarket. He plans to escape from Finland with this money.
Nothing can go wrong anymore.
(Joonas:) What were you afraid before?
That I would manage to get caught before we were able to go.
It takes as long as for us as want to spend on the road.
I will spend at least as long as we have the money.
And it won't be a problem to get more money.
If the money runs out, then we go to work.
I believe that I will stay on this trip.
I just have a backpack of clothes, as you can see.
Backbag full of clothes.
And in the wallet about 20'000 of old money (~3'600�)
About.
Now we are in Stockholm.
I've never been so far from my home Fuck hello what a place!
This train station ... fuck ... Whooo. This is the size of Rovaniemi.
That much I can say.. Let's go up there.
Things could not be any better, damn it!
We're are in Copenhagen tomorrow morning.
Walking at 07h inside to Christiania, fuck.
Marijuana smell starts to come on your face.
I will smoke a massive joint, unbelievable 'flowerpuffs'.
Bevar Christiania = Save Christiania
Fuck, we are now in free area.
Everyone knows each other.
They are just saying hello to each other.
Have smoked already morning joints and go with smiles on their faces
This is a fucking awesome place! Fuck!
I want to live here. Really.
Would they let me build my own little cottage?
Greetings to the police of Rovaniemi.
You fuck heads.
(Jani:) Not like I have anything in Rovaniemi any longer.
There is something like materialistic, but like ...
My family has split up.
Mother drinking.
I love them all, but I have my life.
We are just in 20 minutes in Paris.
Fuck, and an hour from that, I will get Subutex.
I haven't taken any for four days.
But yes, it hasn't really mattered.
There has been enough of eyecandy and all other fun stuff.
But we are like fifteen minutes from Paris.
To control to severe heroine problem the state of France provides free Subutex treatment for the addicts
Some of them sell their Subutex to buy stronger drugs like heroine and crack
We have arrived to the source of illegally sold Subutex in North Europe
I want a room for two and TV.
Two people, one TV?
(English is unclear.)
What does she say?
(English and French in a mess.)
Not even a fuck comes out of this, let's take some other hotel.
I want to take Subutex!
Understand English? I want a fix.
Pretty shitty, but it does not matter. Close the door.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Subutex is here.
8 mg packet, no VAT.
Pull out the cap.
Then the pump. Then pretty generous.
Needle, out. Water.
Underpressure. Mixing a little.
Then loose a bit. Then
The needle to the head, then mix and consume.
And you are ready to enjoy! The big bed is for me by the way.
Look at these!
Voila!
How long does it take, that it begins to work? - About 5 minutes.
But it started already to affect as immediately I started to feel good.
Well, what could be better?
We're in Paris. There's so fucking much of Subutex.
Show them, to all the people.
And I am here watching television here.
Gradually begin to feel the effect. And smoking a cigarette.
By the way I have also marijuana. Flower. I will show you that too.
Woody, slash, flower, slash, weed.
(Sings) Samba, samba, leeo.
Fuck, I have been waiting for this, fuck ... Let's say a .. lifetime.
Soon I take another shot.
Whooo.
We are now, fuck, like at the core.
This is like being in the United States.
Whooo.
I just went to the top of the Eiffel Tower restroom to take a shot of Subutex.
And I filmed everything on tape.
(Sings Elvis Only You song.)
(Jani:) Yes i had my mouth wide open when we came here.
The amount of people and the fact that the streets, they are somehow ...
Like even this little street, full of life.
In Rovaniemi, during this time, fuck, would be dark and quiet.
Like you notice you start comparing everything to Rovaniemi.
That thought I would like to remove.
The memories of the shitty times in Rovaniemi are fading away to the passic scenes of the South
The use of drugs is increasing day by day
First class! First class!
Window seats!
I can not help laughing, we had such a good luck.
With 100� an awesome hotel room. And seaside views.
Soon you cannot even see the shore.
Now is time for Subutex.
And for you, time for lines.
Since getting off from the ship, almost one disc of Subutex used.
(Joonas:) Here? - Yes. 3.. 2 short of full disc.
This is pretty much the coolest a place where I have visited.
Where are we now?
Well, I do not remember.
Cefalu. - Yes.
In cases like that Subu takes your memory.
To things like that it affects fucking much.
May go, fuck, like one and a half years, you use it all the time, then nothing.
And then after the 1.5 years you try to take for example a pause of 1 week.
You have been 4 days without, and you start thinking about all sorts of things.
Like what have you done during last year and half.
But you can not remember. Everything is all a fog to me.
I am so pissed off now, that I've been using here as well.
And a lot more for example that I used in Rovaniemi.
Tolerance is fucking high. If I now want to quit -
half a Subu won't ease a lot.
And I did not look for anything other than this trip itself...
Which is just fucking cool.
Actually those Subus could have been dropped also.
I could have used all the money just for this trip.
Just to buy one box.
Fuck, would have managed with it the amount you would have wanted to manage -
and stopped the drug use during this journey.
That would have emphasized the message.
There is more in the world than just to take drugs, fuck.
Itching in the nose. Hey, I start doing lines now.
(Joonas:) Well? - Yeah. Now starts.
Do you know what this Raappana (his lastname) is doing now?
Throws syringes a side and will never use them ever again.
Radical cecision but this is how it is ...
(Joonas:) You really mean so?
Unusable!
I stopped injecting to veins. (to r�nniin = to gutter, to veins)
The last traces were now left of this trip.
I've taken the last IV drug dose here at the shores of the Sicilian sea.
(Jani:) In addition to traveling -
I have seen myself living right in Spain.
I go to Spain, I have an own house, a wife, -
a bit of field (for agriculture).
I would be working, the wife would be maybe at home. A couple of children. That kind of things.
I 'm already up here, -
so I would say that 50% of the dream is true already.
Uijui, I am tempted for one shot of Subu.
Weird feeling.
Doesn't feel like sniffing any lines, as it is stinging fucking weirdly.
Is not it ... Yes, I still prefer to be without.
Fuck, if I could decide, I would ban Subutex.
Or the abuse of Subutex. Let's put it this way.
Or well.. I don't know.
So that no one would take them first.
Except some heroine addicts, who really need it -
just so that they can normalize their lives.
But, like for myself I do not recommend it.
I will quit. I won't use it anymore, fuck.
It is as fucking simple as that. Or not that simple.
it is rather complex, but still I will do it and quit.
(Joonas:) Why do you want to quit? - Fuck, I do not know, fuck.
It might improve my own quality of life.
Look, what a fucking advertisement pub.
Club for the elderly, fuck, that kind.
Meant for those with career. Look at the ads -
and drink a couple of drinks. Fuck, Just put more Gucci on you.
Fucking weirdos, satan.
What the fuck! (Mit� vittua?)
Now change the side, fuck! Hell no..
That is some fucking nudist.
In Rovaniemi, like that Maire ...
She often, satan, home-brewed beer mug in hand, -
naked at Samppari, but Rovaniemi is quite ...
But fuck at night in Rome fuck we run across satan fuck some fucking nudist fuck nudist ...
Whooo, you can just laugh about it.
While wandering in the streets of Rome I receive a text message to my phone:
"Fuck tell that Jani to contact me or I bash your appartment to pieces with an axe."
This is Jani.
Hello, Hello. You were trying to reach me.
You were trying to reach me.
I haven't just been able to call you.
So. Haven't the money or other.
What else is happening there?
Who took it?
Who took the car?
I knew that I shouldn't have called, satan, at all.
Would be easier to be ignorant. Not to care what happens elsewhere.
And you, fuck, even do not care.
That is why I paid all my debts, everything -
so that here I would not have to stress about it, -
that I have debt collectors after me and other shit.
So now some fucking Kuoksa ... Oh, fuck I am irritated now!
That was the last option To make that call, fuck.
If the cops are listening to Pia's phone -
Now they know that I am in Italy.
Yeah, right, and now I have to be accountable to Kuoksa -
for such a car, that I do not even have anymore.
I am not excited. Not at all, fuck, not at all.
They think that they can somehow control me -
but fuck, no fucking way. Fucking no way.
There, satan, damn and let 'em get me here.
This is annoying in a way that, -
that if you ever been involved in something -
that would be kind the rest of your life, fuck.
Due to confusing chain of events in Rovaniemi, Jani is again in debts and his friend has been threatened
But I guess he realizes that if I had been the snitch, -
I would have never got this far.
But that it that what he considers to be what ...
It is a different matter.
The way, how these fingers went, is a different matter.
I myself offered my fingers to them. As a compensation.
So that is the difference.
In my opinion it is big but.
I was, like, hit me, if it makes you feel any better.
I do not know.
We arrive to Spain
Today, I haven't taken a single dose of drugs.
Oh, bloody hell, I was boiling this morning.
I almost lost my nerves and ultimately I lost my nerves.
(Joonas:) Well, why was that? - Started to be really pissed, as there was no drugs.
Really pissed off.
Fuck
(Jani:) Then when I got an own, fuck, small house and, fuck, my own field -
and so on ... that would be the center of my world.
We are now on the African side, in a Spanish town.
And there it is now.
This is the high quality shit.
From there when you smoke a puff, I will say ...
Check it out now. Fuck, I say, that hello, hello, hello!
We have smack, smack, smack ... 'Horse' (polle, slang term for heroine).
(Joonas:) So why do you want to try?
Fuck, Wonder why?
(Joonas:) Huh? - I do not know, just to try it.
(Joonas:) I mean why? - I guess want to try heroine.
(Joonas:) But why? - I do not know. I want the feeling (notkut).
(Jani:) It's hard to change way of life or lifestyle.
To change it completely. It does not happen overnight.
You have to want it yourself, more than anything else.
And not, fuck, fear and run away.
For that reason many good things have been ruined.
I will build a small cottage for myself somewhere over to the green fields.
Field (agricultural) behind it.
And in front of it that kind of wooden fence.
Behind of it that kind 2m high stone fence.
I have a wife, and -
not that much money, so quite a modest life, but -
everyone are happy -
and I go some little job -
five days a week.
That's how I see my self.
I would then no longer exist, I would be someone else.
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