All language subtitles for Young Dylan s05e13 Funcle.eng

[upbeat music]

Almost there?

[claps]

-Yes!
-Let's go!

[doorbell rings]

I'll get it.

What are you selling?
Oh man, no chocolate?

. You must be young Dyllie, dude.

Yazzy tells me you're a rapper.

Rapper, rhyme specialist,
future young GOAT,

I have a lot of titles.

But who are you exactly?
And why no candy?

Uncle Chews!

Hey, there he is,
my little future chef!

Bow!
Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, bow!

Uncle whos?

Dylan, this is our uncle,
Uncle Chews.

Chews? Hmm,
not really clearing things up.

-Uncle Chews
-Hey!

It's my big brother! Oh!

How are you?

-Good. How are you?
-Good.

Oh, um, that explains
the uncle part,

but it's the Chews part
I'm stuck on.

His name is actually Charles.

Charlie was named after him.

And when Yazzy was little,
she couldn't say Charles.

She could only say

-Chews!
-Chews!

Oh. Nope, still don't get it.

Charlie, why don't you take
your uncle's bags upstairs?

-What's up, big bro?
-What up, Yazzy?!

[Charlie] Rebecca, you're not
going to believe this!

What's up, Myles?

I'm all right.
Yeah, I'm all right.

So, uh, so, uh, Chews,
still no nickname for me, huh?!

Uh, yeah, we can try
a Lil' M again.

[laughs] No, I'm good.

Chews, it's been so long.
It's been too long.

I know, but we had so much fun
the last time we were together.

When we went to the...

Uh-huh, and then that woman...

Yeah, yeah, she grabbed--

[in unison]
The purple one!

[laughs]

-Yes!
-Yeah.

[Yasmine] Oh, my goodness.

Did you understand all that?

Not a word.

I just don't like
being left out.

-Uncle Chews!
-Oh, there she is.

Our future president.

Uncle Chews, why didn't you tell
us you were coming to town?

Well, you know, I wanted
to surprise you.

I'm not staying long.

Just a quick layover
before I fly to Malaysia.

-Oh, Malaysia.
-Come on, sit, sit, sit.

Everybody sit, sit.
Everybody, sit, sit, sit, sit.

-Hey.
-You guys look great.

Dylan, Uncle Chews is the best.

He travels the world and has the
most amazing stories.

Tell him.

Well, I travel the world and
have the most amazing stories.

[laughing]

See? He's the best.

He also brings us the coolest
gifts from around the world.

-Oh.
-My favorite is this.

It's Ugandan walking stick
he got from a hidden village

on Mount Moroto.

Hidden villages in Africa?!
Yo, are you a spy?

I can neither confirm
nor deny that.

[laughing]

Well, I'm going
to tell everyone you're a spy.

Having an uncle as
a spy gets you street cred.

That's what's up.

Hey, I'm your uncle.

-Exactly.
-Speaking of gifts,

is there anything
in there for us?

No... just playing.

Come on, you know
your uncle got you.

All right, now these are
shark tooth necklaces, okay?

They are from the
islands of Guam...

-Wow!
-...and Saipan, okay?

[chuckles]

-Yeah!
-Wow.

If the teeth are this big,
then how big was the shark?

All I can say is if you've met
this shark in an alley,

give him your wallet and run.

-[laughing]
-Run! Run!

Yo, somehow this
brings my swag

to a whole 'nother level.

I didn't think
that was possible.

This is jaw-some...

Actually, this is fin-credible.

Or shark-tastic! Ho ho! Ho ho!

Uncle Chews,
tell me some more stories.

[upbeat music]

? From the Chi, down in ATL,
family living well ?

? Uncle Myles
ain't understand my style ?

? Had to show and tell ?

? Auntie Yaz said
I'm good at math ?

? I should never fail ?

? And Cousin Becca,
she a steppa ?

? Charlie rollin' with the kid ?

? Yeah, ah, [Who?]
You gonna love Young Dylan ?

? Yeah, ah, [Who?]
Who gonna love Young Dylan ?

? Yeah, ah, [Who?]
Who gonna love Young Dylan ?

? Yeah, ah, [Who?]
You gonna love Young Dylan ?

? Yeah, ah, [Who?]
Who gonna love Young Dylan ?

? Yeah, ah, [Who?]
You gonna love Young Dylan ?

And that's how I helped LeBron
get over his fear

of eating fish eggs.

-Oh!
-Wow!

Do you have any cool
rapper stories?

Ever heard of Jam Rock?

Jam Rock's
my new favorite rapper!

Met him in Jamaica, man.
He was rapping.

I was making jerk lobster.
Ba-da-bing! Shoo!

Lobster? I thought he was
allergic to shellfish.

Yeah, he invited me to chill
on his yacht, right?

And even the pod
of dolphins waved at us.

-[mimics dolphin call]
-Huh?

I thought Jam Rock
was afraid of yachts.

Dylan, stop interrupting.

Oh, Unc, did I tell you

that Dylan and I started a label
called Beatzlanta Records?

What? That's amazing!
I'm so proud of you!

What about you, Charlie?

Oh, oh, tell him
about the culinary program.

I've been saving up for
a summer culinary program.

The top students get
to be sous chefs for the night.

It's an amazing opportunity.

And we know Charlie's gonna
be a top student.

Now, if you kids could start
taking everything out back,

and Charlie,
you can show Uncle Chew

why you won first place

at Taste of the Town
cooking competition.

-What?
-Yeah, but I don't want to brag.

You know what Uncle Chew says.

What do I always say, Charlie?

Always brag about yourself.

-Let's go, let's go.
-Awesome.

Hey, let me tell you guys
about the time

that I wrestled a raccoon out
of an old lady's wig.

-What?
-[Chew] Yeah, yeah.

The raccoon thought he had me.
But you know what?

Not Uncle Chew. No, sir.

Okay. [sighs]

Yasmine, has somebody
been sitting in my chair?

Where's my cup?
Where's my favorite mug?

It's okay.
I see what you're doing.

Your brother comes to town

and then everybody is
all about Uncle Chew.

As soon as Uncle Chews get
here, "Chew, Chew!"

Okay, okay. I see it.
Ha, ha, ha.

Fun time, fun time has begun.

[upbeat music]

[knocking]
Come in.

[in unison]
Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Wilson.

Hey, you two! Perfect timing.

The kids are out back
with my brother.

He made a surprise visit.

Oh, yeah.
You guys are gonna love him.

He's got some really amazing
stories to tell.

But don't worry if
you don't get,

like, a cool nickname or a gift.

Takes years, apparently.

Mmm, raisins.

What are you making,
oatmeal cookies?

-My favorite!
-No, silly.

It's my infamous potato salad.

I used to always make it for
my big brother as a kid.

He took one bite,
and the look on his face,

I knew it was a hit.

Grandma V was right.

We have to keep her away
from the kitchen.

-I agree.
-Oh, wow.

Hey, do you mind mixing in

the rest of
the ingredients for me?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We totally can.

Awesome, great.

Maybe we could salvage this.

-Myles.
-Hmm?

Do you remember last week
when I had that deadline,

and I was rushing to list
that big house for sale?

Funny thing is, that house has
the same address as ours.

But we're on Kensie,
not Kensley.

What did you do?

I accidentally listed
our house for sale.

Yasmine, you're a realtor.

I know, but look at that offer.

Come on, Yasmine.
You're a great realtor.

[chuckles]

If we sell our house,

we can live on the super fancy
side of town and be one

of thosepeople.

[Myles] If they're willing to
pay that much,

we can have
country club problems

and caviar dreams,
darling.

[lavishly] Darling,
can you imagine?

No, they can't sell
the house and move.

How will me and Rebecca hang out
and do all the things we love

to do together?

Same for me
with Dylan and Charlie.

This isn't good.

-That's crazy.
[upbeat music]

[laughing loudly]

Then the prince says to me,
"If you had beat me,

I would have given you
my 24-carat gold private jet."

What, LeBron?

One second, guys. That's work.

I told him those fish eggs
would hatch in his stomach.

[whispering]
Psst, Rebecca, come on.

[whispering]
What, what?

No shade, but is Uncle Chews
legit?

Just a minute ago,
he said he was hanging out

with Drake in his
neighborhood in Vancouver.

But we all know
Drake lives in Toronto,

and his Jam Rock
story seems off.

Jam Rock doesn't
even like boats.

He says it in one of his tracks:

? I got the boat rocking
from left to right ?

? My dreads swinging
like I'm Weezy ?

? I make it look easy ?

? I'm really not a fan
I'd rather be on some land ?

Maybe he changed his mind,

like you did
with Brussels sprouts.

Okay, I'll admit,

I misjudged them;
they're delicious.

But tell me they don't
look like tiny alien brains.

Listen,
I know I'm right about this.

I know my rap facts.

Wait, are you just jealous

because Uncle Chews life is
cooler than yours?

His life is not
ascool as mine's!

I know, that's why I said
iscooler than yours.

Trust me, something's fishy.

And it's not just
this shark tooth.

[smooth music]

[upbeat music]

[telephone rings]

Oh, another call for the house.
Hello?

Yes, it's an amazing house
to raise kids in.

No, it's not a good house
to raise peacocks in.

Goodbye.

[telephone rings]
Hello?

I'm sorry, what?

How many steps from the master
bedroom to the bathroom?

How much did you say
you were offering again?

In cash?
Oh, I believe it's ten feet.

Hold on a second while I check.

Wow, if this house was a woman,

it'd be Coco Jones
'cause it is hot!

This is getting serious.

We have to do something.

[doorbell rings]

Hi, we're here about
the house for sale.

Are your mom and dad home?

Uh...

They're in the basement.
dealing with the mold.

And the rats. The rats, yeah.

They got rats to eat the mold.

Yeah, and then they got cats
to eat the rats to eat the mold.

It's a vicious cycle.

Yep. Circle of life.
What can you do?

-Um, ok
-Have a good day.

[Ben] Do rats eat mold?

That was crazy.

I'm getting a crazy idea.

[upbeat music]

Uh, raisins?

Who puts raisins
in potato salad?

-Uncle Myles?
-What's up?

Can I see you in my studio?
Like, it's important.

Right now, like,
really, right now.

Dylan, what are you doing?

And what did you do
to Rebecca's walking stick?

Uncle Myles,
Uganda want to hear this.

-What?
-Uncle Chews is

a big old fibber.

He lied about Jam Rock,
he lied about the shark tooth,

and he lied about Rebecca's
Ugandan walking stick.

-What?
-It was made in Wyoming,

not Uganda.

Unless there's a hidden Ugandan
village in Wyoming,

I'm telling you, Uncle Chews
stories are all cap.

I knew it, I knew it, I knew it.

I knew LeBron
already liked fish eggs.

See?

You need to tell Mama Yaz,
Rebecca, and Charlie.

They're all being swept up
in a tsunami of lies.

A tsunami of lies? Yes.

Yes, yes, yes.

Nope, nope, nope.

Nope. We can't. We can't do it.

We can't. We can't.
I mean, look at it.

First of all, that's
Yasmine's big brother, right?

Secondly, it's Charlie's
namesake.

I mean, and look at Rebecca.
She adores her Uncle Chews.

If we tell him, that'll ruin
them, as much as I want to.

Besides, I mean, look.

I guess his stories aren't
really hurting anybody.

Except for me.

Guys, Uncle Chews has
the best idea.

Yeah, I was thinking,

why should Charlie spend
that money to learn how

to cook for someone when he can
use that money to make money?

Say what now?

Yeah.
What exactly does that mean?

It means that I'm going to buy
my own hot dog cart

and make money instead of going
to that culinary program.

But, Charlie, you were
so excited about the program

and the opportunity to become
a sous chef,

like, you don't
even like hot dogs.

Well, you don't have
to like them to sell them.

Exactly.
So I'm going to let my money-

[in unison] Make me money.

Let us show you
what we're working with.

[nervously laughs]

You gotta scratch what I said.
We gotta take Uncle Chews down.

You know what you should
have next to your cart?

Those inflatable dancing things.

I could call my cart
the Dancing Dogs.

Uncle Chews, remember
that Jam Rock story?

Where in Jamaica were you
and Jam Rock at the time?

-Montego Bay.
-Ah, Montego Bay.

Yes, yes.
North side or south side?

South, near the resort.

Mm-hmm.
When you were in Uganda,

how did you find
that hidden village?

Well, I had a tour guide
who knew where it was:

Akello, from the village
of Jinja near Lake Victoria.

Check out this picture
of the two of us.

But do you have a picture
with you and Jam Rock together?

Ha-ha. You and Jam Rock.

What are you doing?
What's with all the questions?

It's okay, Charlie,
it's all right.

You know, sometimes people get
a little suspicious

when you share all
your amazing stories, huh?

-Amazing.
-But never fear.

Uncle Chews doesn't disappoint.
Check it out.

So, uh, Charlie,

why don't we
draw up designs

for your hot dog cart
so it looks like a dancing dog?

Cool, maybe one could
be breakdancing and it could

be a break-fast dog.

-I like it. Break-fast dog.
-Breakfast dog.

-We need to come up with a plan.
-Mm-hmm.

I bet if we can get
Uncle Chews' phone,

the proof would
be right on there.

Good idea, yeah.
And then I'll get Charlie away.

That way you can get
a confession out

of Uncle Chews.

-Boom.
-Yeah.

-There it is.
-There it is.

Operation:
Prove Uncle Chews is a Liar.

Oh. the offers keep rollin' in.

[phone beeps]
Whoa.

Uh-oh. This doesn't look good.
I thought you had a plan.

I do, that last text
was from me.

I created a fake account so we
could outbid everyone else.

Genius.

[phone beeps]

She likes the offer.
Fish is on the hook.

[phone beeps]

Uh-oh, fish wants
to know more about me.

We're the Perezes,

and we think
your house would

be perfect for us.

And our seven kids.

Seven kids? Wow, you're heroes.
What do you do for a living?

Uh, my wife's
a high-powered lawyer

and I'm a world-famous
rodeo clown.

What?
I want them to think we're fun.

That sounds like fun.

What are your kids like?

They're mathletes and athletes.

No, they should be scientists
and poets.

One should have written

an award-winning children's
book about a panda and an emu.

[Bethany] No, emus are creepy.

[Booder] No, emus aren't creepy.

They're the eagles
of the bird world.

Booder, emus are.

Booder? Booder!

Okay, you two. Where are you?

Okay. What's going on?

Mrs. Wilson,
we overheard you talking

about selling the house,

so we made up the Perezes
to outbid everyone else.

You did what?

We don't want you to move.

We don't want
to lose our friends either.

We were never going
to sell our house.

We were just
having fun dreaming.

[sighing]

There's so many memories here.

And plus, we would never
move our kids away

from their incredibly loyal
and incredibly nosy friends.

Why didn't you just say
something instead of spying?

It would have saved you
a ton of trouble

and us from that
weird text conversation.

A famous rodeo clown. Really?

And seven children?

You'd have been lucky
to sell to our imaginary family:

Lucy, Dory, Molly, Corey,
Bailey, Haley, and Fred

would have loved it here.

[upbeat music]

Uncle Myles, I snagged Uncle
Chews phone when he left

to go to the bathroom,

and I can finally prove

that he's been lying
this whole time, look!

-What's up?
-He's been using that app

to Photoshop a picture with him
and Jam Rock.

I've got to tell
Charlie and Rebecca.

-Hey, don't. Dylan--
-What's up, man?

Hey, Uncle Chews,
we got to talk.

Sure, what's up?

[sighs]

I know you've been lying.

-What lying?
-[Myles] This belong to you?

Now the question is, why?

Look, Myles, you've got
to understand.

Growing up, Yazzy always looked
up to me, and I loved that.

Then she went off to college
and got married to you,

and I just wasn't
that cool older brother anymore.

But then she had kids,

and that gave me someone new
to look up to me.

I guess I just didn't want
to lose that feeling again.

Huh. I didn't know that.

But you can't keep lying.

All right, how about I chill
on the stories?

Just don't tell Yaz, okay?

I mean,
she means everything to me.

I know, and I won't.

I know how special
she is to you,

and I don't want to ruin
that bond.

Okay, no more stories.

And you got to do something

about this hot dog
situation with Charlie.

It ain't kosher.

Yeah, I went too far with that.

How about I tell
him just not to.

How about I tell him?

If I leave it up to you,

you'll have him opening up

a Moroccan ice cream stand
or something.

That's not a bad idea.

Just, Uncle Chews
Stop it, all right?

-All right.
-All right.

Charlie, promise me you'll do
the culinary program,

and I'll give you
whatever you want.

Whatever I want, eh?
What about your cool jacket?

Yeah, sure. It's yours.

-And your... cool sneakers?
-Okay.

Including the ones
on your feet?

Really. these too?

Fine, but only if you do
the culinary program.

-Okay.
-Dylan, what's going on?

Rebecca, sit down.

I have to tell
you guys something.

I don't know how to say it,
so I'm just going to say it.

Uncle Chews has been lying
about his stories.

[gasping]

-No! No!
-Say it ain't so!

Say it ain't so, Joe!

Just kidding, we already knew.

-You what?
-Yeah, Mom told us a while ago.

She did? She didn't tell me?

The truth is,
I see how happy it makes him,

and I don't want
to break his heart.

He's my Funcle,
so I just let him be him.

Besides, he makes up
the coolest handshakes,

and his stories are wild.

-Mm-hmm.
-Wait, what about the mess

with you opening up
a hot dog cart instead of going

to the culinary program?

You need to give me some credit.

I can look out for myself.

-Can you?
-I just tricked you

out of all your stuff, didn't I?

[smooth music]

Tell me how could you
have kept this from me

all this time?

I mean, look at it this way.

He gets to be the hero
and you get the girl.

Yeah, I get the girl.

[chuckles smugly]

I can't believe you gave all
your clothes to Charlie.

Let's not talk about it.

Charlie, can you please be
careful not to spill on my gear?

You mean my gear.
And now worries.

Whoops! I dripped on my drip.

Charlie, you can't
play like that.

At the end of the day,
that's my stuff.

[Charlie] Not really.
You gave it to me,

so now
it's actually technically mine.

Okay, cool. Okay, all right.
See me the court.

Okay. So here it is.

I got a lot of cool nicknames,
all right?

No, I mean, you ready?
You ready for this?

Okay. I got M-Stacks.

-M-Stacks?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Let's go with M-Rocks.

-M-Rocks?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And my favorite, Money Myles.

-Money Myles?
-Mm-hmm.

All right, look.
I'll tell you what.

You beat me in a game of HORSE,
and you can pick the nickname.

Oh, I want in on this,
but if I win,

Chews has to promise not
to stay away for so long,

and Myles has to take me
to whatever restaurant I want.

-Deal. Deal.
-[gasps] Okay, okay.

You know we're gonna lose,
right?

No, we're both gonna win.

[upbeat music]
[cheering]

[rousing music]

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