All language subtitles for Life With Father (Comedy 1947) William Powell, Irene Dunne & Elizabeth Taylor

Well, these are certainly the cleanest
steps on Madison Avenue.

That's how Mr. Day wants them kept.

Good morning.

Morning.

You're here, aren't you? Just this
morning.

This is the way Mr. Day gets his milk.

Get up.

Annie, be careful of this dish. It could
burn your hands.

And keep the cover on till you're ready
to serve them.

Mr. Daylight's muffins hot.

I'll do that.

Is the table set for breakfast?

Yes, ma 'am.

Good morning, ma 'am.

Good morning, Annie. How are you getting
along?

All right, ma 'am. I hope. Now, don't be
nervous just because this is your first

day. Everything's going to be all right.

But I do hope nothing goes wrong.

Oh, no, Annie. The cream and sugar go
down at this end.

Oh, I thought in the center, ma 'am.
Everyone could reach the maze here.

Mr. Day sits here.

Excuse me.

I didn't know where to place the
napkins, ma 'am. You can tell by the

boys have their initials. C for
Clarence.

He sits here.

J for John.

Here. W for Whitney. He sits over there,
next to his father. And the one with

the little dog on it is Harland, of
course.

He's the baby.

This narrow, plain one is mine.

And this is Mr. Dave.

It's just like mine, except that it got
bent one morning.

And that reminds me, Annie.

Always have Mr. Day's coffee piping hot.
And whenever Mr. Day speaks to you,

just say yes. Don't be nervous. You'll
get used to him.

Oh, that beautiful rubber plant.

I'm so glad it came.

You mustn't water it every day. Too much
moisture makes it very unhappy.

Oh, good morning, Mother. I thought you
were still upstairs.

Good morning, Clarence. Father must be
talking to himself.

A redhead.

Did you sleep well, Mother? Yes, thank
you, dear.

Golly, I'm hungry.

Oh, and, Annie, we always start with
fruit in the morning, except the two

younger boys who have their porridge in
milk. Jiminy, another wreck on the New

Haven. That always disturbs the stock
market.

Father won't like that. I do wish the
New Haven would stop having wrecks if

knew how it upsets your father.

My soul and body, Clarence, what's
happened to your coat?

Oh, it ripped open again. Margaret
mended it for me, but it won't stay

Oh, dear.

I'll just have to speak to your father
about a new suit of clothes.

Clarence, why did you take my H2S so far
out of our clothes closet? I've told

you a hundred times, that closet's not
to make experiments in.

Good morning, Mother.

John, have you been making those
chemical smells again? No, Mother. I'm

an electric battery. It'll ring a bell
and everything. You know your father

doesn't like electricity.

But, Mother, everything's going to be
electricity.

Not in this house.

Oh!

The one I gave you yesterday.

It isn't pressed yet. I forgot to give
it to Margaret.

I told you distinctly I wanted to wear
that necktie today.

You've got plenty of neckties. Put on
another one right away and come down to

breakfast. I don't know what this
world's coming to.

Mother, may I have my breakfast early?
I'm going to play baseball.

Three.

Whitney, before you leave the house, you
have to study your catechism. But,

Mother, they're going to let me pitch
today.

Seven to three. Buck Ewing in a home
run. Let me see.

Boys, don't wrinkle the paper before
your father sees it.

Mother, could you ask me my catechism
now? I think I know it. Well, let's see.

What is your name?

Whitney Benjamin.

Who gave you your... Come and help me
down, Mother.

There are steps to come down, Mom.

Good morning, darling.

Good morning, Mother.

How's your finger?

It itches. Good. That's a sign it's
getting better.

See, what was I doing?

Oh, yes, the catechism.

Who gave you your name?

My sponsors at baptism, wherein I was
made a member of Christ, the child of

and an inheritor of the kingdom of
heaven.

Mother, if I hadn't been baptized,
wouldn't I have any name? Not in the

the church.

What did your sponsors then for you?

They did promise and vow three things in
my name.

Good morning, boys.

Good morning.

Good morning, Father.

Morning, Vinnie.

Have a good night? Yes, thank you,
Clare.

Good. Sit down, boys.

What's that thing doing in here?

Clare, that's our new rubber plant.

Place for rubber plants is on the
equator.

Take that object out, Catherine.

You're not Catherine?

No, sir.

Good. Never liked Catherine anyway.

Thank you, Clare.

Put it somewhere else. Annie, but not
too near a window.

Sit down, Harlan.

Thank you, dear.

Where did that dog come from?

She'll be here, Mother. I'll talk to
her.

What did you say?

Claire, that new suit looked very nice.

You blasted tight.

You put on a little weight, dear.

Why, we got the same to always have.

Well, Clarence has just managed to ruin
the only decent suit he has.

I'm sorry, but I'm afraid he'll need a
new suit of clothes.

Vinnie Clarence has to learn not to be
so hard on his clothes.

But, Father, I thought... When you start
in Yale in the fall, you'll be

completely outfitted. But nothing this
summer.

Can't I have one of your old suits cut
down for me?

Every suit I own still has plenty of
wear in it.

I wear my clothes until they're worn
out.

Well, if you want your clothes worn out,
Clarence can wear them out much faster

than you can.

Yes, and Father, you never get a chance
to wear yours out. Every time you get a

new batch of clothes, Mother sends the
old ones to the missionary barrel.

I guess I'm just as good as any old
missionary.

Clarence, before you compare yourself to
a missionary, remember the sacrifices

they make.

Oh, I don't know, Vinnie.

I think my clothes would look better on
Clarence than on some hottentot.

Have that dark sack suit of mine cut
down a fidget. Oh, thank you, Father.

One of Father's suits.

Thank you, sir. In return for that,
Clarence, I want you to practice more

on your violin.

Whitney, don't eat so fast.

Well, Father, I'm going to pitch today.

But before I go, I have to study my
catechism.

What do you bother with that for?

Because if he doesn't know his
catechism, he can't be confirmed.

But, Finney, Whitney's going to pitch
today.

He can be confirmed any old time.

Clare, sometimes it seems to me you
don't care whether your children get to

heaven or not. Oh, Whitney will get to
heaven, all right.

I'll be there before you are, Whitney.
I'll see that you get in.

And, Whitney, when we get to heaven,
we'll organize a baseball team of our

Good.

It'd be just like you to try and run
things up there.

Well, from all I've heard about heaven,
it seems to be a pretty unbusinesslike

place. They could probably use a good
man like me.

What makes you so sure they'll let you
into heaven?

Well, if they don't, I'll certainly
raise a devil of a row.

Claire, I do hope you'll behave when you
get to heaven.

Now, Vinnie, what...

How many times have I asked you not to
engage a maid who doesn't know how to

serve properly?

Claire, can't you see she's new and
doing her best?

How can I serve myself when she's
holding that platter over my head?

Hold it lower, Annie.

Yes, ma 'am.

What became of the one we had yesterday?

I don't know why you can't keep a maid.

Oh, you don't. Why on earth can't you
run your house the way I run my office?

All I want is service.

What the devil's that noise?

It's Annie.

Annie? Who's Annie?

The maid. I'll take it, Annie.

Claire, aren't you ashamed of yourself?

What have I done now?

You made her cry speaking to her the way
you did.

I never said a word to her.

I was addressing myself to you.

I do wish you'd be more careful.

It's hard enough to keep a maid and the
uniforms just fit this one.

Where did you come from?

Who do you belong to?

He's my father.

Her name is Princess.

Looks more like a prince to me.

What's wanted?

Yes, that's healing nicely.

I guess you'll know the next time that
cats don't like to be hugged.

It's all right to stroke them, but don't
squeeze them.

Now go back and finish your oatmeal.

I don't like oatmeal.

Go on and finish it. It's good for you.
But I don't like it.

I'll tell you what you like and what you
don't like.

You're not old enough to know about such
things.

You've no business not liking oatmeal.

It's good.

I hate it.

That's enough. We won't discuss it.

Eat that oatmeal at once.

that letter's for your mother.

I finished my oatmeal, Father. May I be
excused? Yes, Whitney, you may go.

It's a good game.

I will.

Whitney?

Yes, Mother.

My catechism.

Never mind this morning, darling. Run
along.

Thank you, Mother.

What's wanted?

Margaret, what is this?

Coffee, sir.

It is not coffee.

You couldn't possibly take water and
coffee beans and arrive at that.

It's slops. That's what it is. Slops.
Take it away.

I come down to this table every morning
hungry. Well, if you're hungry, Claire,

why aren't you eating your breakfast?

I am.

Aunt Judith wants me to come up and
visit her.

Now, Vinnie, I want no more relatives in
this house.

We are going to live here by ourselves
in peace and comfort.

Claire, I was saying Aunt Judith wants
me to visit her.

Oh. Eat your oatmeal, dear.

What on earth is this?

Dear friend, Day.

We are assigning you the exclusive
rights to Staten Island for selling the

home pop -up of popcorn.

I think that's for me, Father.

Well, then, why isn't it addressed to
Clarence Day, Jr.? Oh, it is.

I wouldn't get mixed up in popcorn,
Clarence. It's too indigestible.

I've found another wreck on the New
Haven. If you please, ma 'am, there's a

dollar due on a package.

It's from Lewis and Conger's. Oh, yes,
those kitchen knives I ordered.

Make a memorandum of that, Vinnie. One
dollar and whatever it was for.

Of course, Claire.

I must have a record of what is spent
running this house.

I've never understood what good a record
is after the money's gone.

There's just a dollar market.

Vinnie, this house must be run on a
business basis. Of course, dear. That's

the household accounts are for.

Oh, Claire, it's half past eight.

You don't want to be late at the office.

Any time.

Annie, clear the table now.

Yes, ma 'am, I'll do that.

Clarence, John.

Yes, mother?

You boys go up and move the small bureau
from my room into yours. Who's coming?

Cousin Cora, and she's bringing a friend
with her, a young girl. A girl?

You will have to help entertain her,
Clarence. Oh, Mother, do I have to? Wait

till Father finds out we've got
visitors. There'll be a rumpus. John,

criticize your father.

He's very hospitable.

After he gets used to the idea.

I like coffee, I like tea, I like the
girls, and the girls like me. Well, I

don't like girls, and they don't like
me.

Oh, Dad!

Go on, boys, go on.

the matter, Claire? What's wrong?

How did that get in this room? Now,
Claire, how was the new maid to know?

Keep that abomination out of here. All
right, I'll take it.

Oh, Claire, dear, I'm afraid I'm going
to need some more money.

You were complaining about the coffee
this morning. Well, that nice French

coffee pot is broken, and you know how
it got broken. Never mind that, Vinnie.

As I remember, that coffee pot cost five
dollars and something.

I'll give you six dollars.

When you get it, Vinnie, enter the exact
amount in the ledger. Of course, Clare.

We can't go on, month after month,
having the household accounts in such a

No. And I thought of a system that would
make my bookkeeping perfect.

Well, I'm certainly relieved to hear
that.

All we have to do is open charge
accounts everywhere.

And the stores will do my bookkeeping
for me.

Now, wait a minute, Vinnie. Then, when
the bills come in, you'd know exactly

where your money had gone.

Yes, I certainly would.

Vinnie, we get enough bills as it is.

Claire, dear, don't you hate those
arguments we have every month?

I certainly do.

Not to have those, I should think, would
be worth something to you.

Well, I'll open an account at Lewis and
Conger's and one at McCreary's to start

with. Thank you, Claire.

We'll see how it works out. Thank you.

Oh, the rector's coming to tea today.

The rector? Well, I'm glad you warned
me. I'll go to the club.

Don't expect me home until dinner time.

Claire, dear, I do wish you'd take a
little more interest in the church.

Getting me into heaven is your business,
Vinnie.

If there's anything wrong with my ticket
when I get there, you can fix it up.

Everybody loves you so much, I'm sure
God must too.

I'll do my best, Claire.

It wouldn't be heaven without you.

If you're there, Vinnie, I'll manage to
get in some way, even if I have to climb

the fence.

Come to me.

Come to me, sweet Marie.

Margaret! Margaret!

Oh, yeah!

What's the matter, Claire? What's wrong?

Why did God make so many dumb fools and
Democrats?

Oh, politics.

Yes, but it's taking the bread out of
our mouths.

Honest Hugh Grant.

Honest. Fine mayor you've turned out to
be.

If you can't run this city without
raising taxes every five minutes, you'd

better get out.

Let someone who can.

Richard Croker's running this town.

And you're just his cat's paw.

Tell me this.

Are these increased taxes going into
public improvements?

Or are they going into graft?

Answer me that honestly if you can, Mr.
Honest Hugh Grant. You can't. I thought

so. Bah!

You were elected to office on the
promise that you would put an end to all

thievery and corruption.

Have you put an end to it? No.

You've encouraged it.

Every day there's some new raid on the
public treasury.

If you don't stop thundering the
pocketbooks of the good citizens of New

we're going to throw you and your boodle
board of aldermen out of office.

I'm warning you for the last time.

Robbery. That's what it is. Highway
robbery.

Annie. Take this fresh cup of coffee in
to Mr. Day.

But Mr. Day is not a visitor.

New York City are not going to tolerate
these conditions any longer.

Sooner or later you'll know.

We pay you a good round sum to watch
after our interests, and all we get is

inefficiency.

I know you're an income poop, and I
strongly suspect you of being a

You're not going to escape your legal
responsibilities.

Legal responsibilities?

By that, I mean criminal
responsibilities.

Don't think for one minute we're going
to let you escape.

We're going to throw you into jail.

Annie, are you hurt?

He can't throw me into jail.

Really?

Minnie, why can't I have quiet here in
the morning? Claire, what happened?

It sounded to me as though that maid
dropped a whole tray of dishes. Yes, but

what did you say to her?

Say to her?

I haven't seen her since breakfast.

I'd better get to the office.

Oh, yes, Claire, you don't want to be
late.

I'll be home in plenty of time for
dinner.

Why don't we have chicken fricassee
tonight?

Well, Claire, chicken's gone up. It's
eight cents a pound.

When did ever she going dressed up like
that?

Claire, you've done it again. How could
you?

Could I what?

Can't you see she's leaving?

Dear, I have no time to engage a new
maid. We'll have to have dinner out.

Dinner out?

Nonsense. I'll engage a new maid myself.

Claire, you can't. She has to fit the
uniforms.

I'll have one here in an hour.

Goodbye, dear. Bye.

Good morning, Mrs. Day. On your way to
the office? Yes, sir. Good morning. Mrs.

Day?

Morning, Mr. Day. Yeah.

Get in.

Cory, wonderful to see you.

I declare you're getting younger and
prettier every year. Oh, this is Mary

Skinner. It's Skinner's daughter.

My goodness, I never would have known
you.

Just leave your things out here and come
right on in.

I've heard my father talk so much about
you.

Did he tell you how he used to dip my
pigtails in the inkwell at school?

What's the news in Pleasantville, Cora?
Oh, Vinnie, I have so much to tell you.

We wrote you that Aunt Carrie broke her
hip. Yes. That was the night that Robert

Ingersoll lectured. Of course, she
couldn't get there, but it was a good

for Mr. Ingersoll she didn't. How do you
do, Cousin Cora?

Oh, Clarence. My, my.

No, Cora, this is John.

John. Why, how you've grown.

You'll be a man before your mother.

John, this is Mary Skinner. How do you
do?

How do you do?

Vinnie, everybody in Pleasantville sends
their love. Grandpa Ebbets.

Cousin Edith and Hattie, the tailors.
Oh, just everybody. Clara, how is

Edith? Oh, he hasn't been at all well.
You know, he only has one kidney, and

that's floating.

How do you do, Cousin Clara? I'm glad to
see you. This can't be Clara.

Yes, it is.

My, my.

My goodness, every time I see you boys,
you've grown another foot.

Let's see. You're going to St. Paul's
now, aren't you? St.

Paul's? I was through with St. Paul's
long ago. I'm starting in Yale this

Yale?

Oh, Mary, this is Clarence, Mary
Skinner.

How do you do?

Oh, this is Mary's first trip to New
York. Yes, it is. It's her first trip.

We'll have to show Mary around.

Oh, I tell you. I'll ask Mr. Day to take
us all to Delmonico's for dinner

tonight. Delmonico's? Think of that,
Mary.

Delmonico's. And Cousin Clara's such a
wonderful host. Well, I know you girls

want to freshen up, so come upstairs.

Clarence, get their bags.

I've given you girls Clarence's room,
but he didn't know about it. Now, I

want you to give us a call. Don't you
bother about us for one minute. John,

their old bags.

Oh,

you play the violin.

Well, I... I fool with it a little.

You're just being modest.

No, really, I... I play the piano.

Not awfully well, but... Now, you're
being modest.

Do you ever play duets?

Well, I haven't up to now.

Neither have I.

Up to now.

didn't tell me about you.

I never met a Yale man before.

What's happened to you?

Nothing. I feel fine.

wish a domestic servant?

Where do you keep them? I will take your
name and address.

Confounding. I'm late at the office now.

If you will give me the details as to
what kind of person you require.

I'm asking you where you keep them.

Why, the girls are in there, but clients
are not allowed in that room.

If you will tell me the kind of a
position you wish to have filled, I'll

glad to...

You stand up, please.

Sir, this is quite against the rules.

I must know what you want the girl for.

I'll take that one. What's your name?

Hilda, sir.

Hilda, you go right over to 420 Madison
Avenue.

I will, sir. That's all, thank you.

Sir, before I can let any girl go from
this establishment, I must know the

character of the home in which she will
be employed.

Madam, I am the character of my home.

My duty toward my neighbor is to love
him as myself and to do unto all men

As... They should do unto me. As they
should do unto me.

To... To... He really knows it. Well,
he's done very well for so young a boy.

May I go now?

Yes, darling.

Thank you, Dr. Lloyd. Come on, Harlan.

Wait for me.

Ah, you and Mr. Day must be very proud
of your children.

I was hoping I'd find Mr. Day at home
this afternoon.

Well, he's usually home from the office
by this time.

Perhaps he's gone for a gallop in the
park. It's such a fine day.

He's very fond of horseback riding, I
believe.

Oh, yes.

Tell me, has he ever been thrown from a
horse?

Oh, no. No horse would throw Mr. Day.

I just thought he might have had some
accident. I notice he never kneels in

church. Oh, that's no accident.

But I don't want you to think he doesn't
pray. He does.

Why, sometimes you can hear him all over
the house.

But he never kneels.

Ah, perhaps that's Mr. Day now.

I hardly think so.

Oh, the devil I forgot.

Claire, you're just in time for tea.

I'll send for some hot water.

How are you, Dr. Lloyd?

It's a great pleasure to have a visit
with you, Mr. Day. Mother.

Are they back yet? No, Clarence, no.

Except for a brief glimpse on the
Sabbath. I don't see much of you.

Well, Clare, did you have a busy day at
the office?

A devilishly busy.

Clare. A very busy day.

Tired out.

How a man can get tired just sitting at
a desk all day, I don't know.

I suppose Wall Street is just as much a
mystery to you as it is to me, Dr.

Lloyd. No, no, it's all very clear to
me.

My mind often goes to the businessman.

The picture I'm most fond of.

is when I envision him at the close of
the day's work, I see him pausing in his

toil, and it comes over him that all
those figures of profit and loss are

without importance or consequence.

Vanity and dust.

Well, I'll be... Claire?

Yes, ma 'am?

Delia, some more hot water, please. Yes,
ma 'am?

Who's that?

The new maid.

Where's the one I sent this morning?

The uniform didn't fit.

I like the one I picked out better.

Claire, Dr.

Lloyd wants to tell us about the plans
for the new edifice.

The new what?

The new church.

You knew we were planning to build a new
church.

Of course, we're going to have to raise
a large sum of money.

Well, personally, I'm against the church
hop, skipping and jumping all over the

town. So any contribution I make will
have to be a small one.

The amount everyone is to subscribe has
already been decided.

Who decided it?

After considerable thought, we voted
that our supporting members should each

contribute a sum equal to the cost of
their pew.

I paid $5 ,000 for my pew. Yes, Claire,
that makes our contribution $5 ,000.

That's robbery.

Do you know what that pew was worth
today?

$3 ,000.

That's what the last one sold for.

I've taken a dead loss of $2 ,000 on
that pew already.

Frank Bagg sold me that pew and the
market was at its peak.

He knew when to get out.

And I'm warning you, Vinnie, if the
market ever goes up, I'm going to unload

that pew.

Clarence Day, how can you speak of the
Temple of the Lord as though it were

something to be bought and sold on Wall
Street?

Now, Mrs. Day, your husband is a
practical man.

We've had to be practical about the new
church.

We have all the facts and figures.

Oh?

What's the property worth where we are
now?

Oh, let's see. Is it $40 ,000?

I know the figure has a four in it.

What's the new piece of property going
to cost you?

I think the figure I heard mentioned was
$85 ,000.

Or was it $185 ,000?

Dr. Lloyd, you preach that someday we'll
all have to answer to God. We shall

indeed.

Well, I hope God doesn't ask you any
questions with figures in them.

Mrs. Day is in the living room. Thank
you.

It's Cousin Cora.

She's passing through town.

Oh. Well.

Oh, hello.

Hello.

Hello. Thank you for helping me.

Come, Mary.

Oh, Vinnie, what a day. We've been in
every shop in town.

Why, Cousin Claire.

Cora. My, my. You're as welcome as the
flowers in May.

This is Mary Skinner, Mr. Dave. How do
you do? I've been telling Mary all about

you. She's been dying to meet you.

Well.

Dr. Lloyd, I want you to meet my
favorite cousin, Miss Cartwright. How do

do? And Mrs. Mary Skinner. Miss Skinner,
Dr.

Lloyd. How do you do? How do you do?

This seems to be a family reunion. I'll
just run along.

Goodbye, Dr. Lloyd.

Goodbye, Miss Carter. Goodbye.

Goodbye. Clarence, you haven't said how
do you do to Dr. Lloyd.

Goodbye, Dr. Lloyd.

Goodbye, everybody.

I'll go to the door with you, Dr. Lloyd.

Thank you so much for the tea. Those
muffins were delicious. Who did you say

this pretty little girl is? She said
Skinner's daughter. This is Mary's first

trip to New York.

Oh, sit down, sit down.

Have some tea. We had tea downtown.

Oh, never mind then.

Delia. Delia, sit down, sit down.

Even if you have had tea, you can stay
and visit for a while.

As a matter of fact, why don't you both
stay to dinner?

That's all arranged, Claire. Cora and
Mary are going to have dinner with us.

Fine, fine.

Of course, you'll just have to take pot
luck.

Well, I'd hardly call it pot luck.

Claire, did you know the girls are going
to visit Aunt Judith in Springfield for

a whole month?

Fine.

Now, how long are you going to be in New
York, Cora?

All week.

Splendid. We'd hope to see something of
you. Well, you certainly will. Cora, did

you find anything you wanted in the
shop?

Oh, I can't wait to show you. Oh, but
I'm afraid some of these packages can't

opened in front of Cousin Claire.

Shall I leave the room?

Oh, Claire.

Clarence, would you take the package in
the hall up to our room, or should I say

your room?

Wasn't it nice of Clarence to give up
his room to us for a whole week?

Cora, come on, I just can't wait to see
what's in those packages.

Well, we'll be back soon.

Uh, Vinnie, I wish to speak to you
before you go upstairs.

I'll be down in just a minute, Clare. I
wish to speak to you now.

I'll be up in just a minute, Cora. It's
all right, Vinnie. Come along, Mary.

two women encamped in our house. Now,
Claire. Answer me, Vinnie. Now, Claire,

you know... Answer me! Just a minute.

Clarence.

Now, Claire, you know you've always been
fond of Cora. What has that to do with

her planking herself down in my house
and bringing hordes of strangers with

How can you call that sweet little girl
a horde of strangers?

Why don't they go to a hotel?

New York is full of hotels built for the
express purpose of housing such

nuisances. Claire, two girls alone in a
hotel?

Why, who knows what might happen to
them. All right, then put them on the

train. If they want to roam with the
gypsies, lend them a hand. Keep them

roaming. But, Clarence, they're just
staying in that little room of

The trouble is they don't stay there.
They stay in the bathroom.

Every time I want to take my bath, it's
full of giggling females washing their

hair. I tell you, I won't have it.

Send them to a hotel. I'll pay the bill
gladly, but get them out of here.

Father, I'm afraid they can hear you
upstairs.

Then keep those doors closed.

Clarence, you open those doors.

Open them all the way.

Now, Claire, you be quiet and behave
yourself.

They're here and they're going to stay
here.

That's enough, Vinnie. I want no more of
this argument.

What I don't understand is why this
swarm of

locusts always... sends on us without
any warning.

Father, may I go along with the rest of
you to Delmonico's?

What's that, Delmonico's? You're taking
Mother, Cousin Cora, and Miss Skinner to

Delmonico's for dinner tonight.

Oh, God, Dad.

I won't have it. I won't have it.

I will not have...

arranged for me.

I bought this house for my own comfort.
I will not submit myself to this

indignity. Now, Clare, what's the
matter? I won't stand it. Why ever, I

stand it!

Clarence!

Do I understand that I am not permitted
to have dinner in my own home?

Oh, Clare, a little change will do you
good.

I have a home to have dinner in, and any
time I can't have dinner at home, this

house is for sale.

Well, Clare, you can't have dinner here
tonight because it isn't ordered.

And besides, Cora and Mary want to see
something of New York.

Well, that's no affair of mine.

I am not a guide to Chinatown and the
Bowery.

Oh, Mr. Day, I just love your house.

I could live here forever.

Cora's waiting for you, Mrs. Day. Oh,
yes, I'll run right up.

Glad you like our house, Miss Skinner.

I like it very much, Mr. Day.

Praise from a stranger is approbation
indeed.

At home, our living room is green.

I like green.

I like green, too.

Red's my favorite color.

It's an interesting thing about colors.

Red's a nice color in a house, too, but
outside, too much red would be bad. I

mean, for instance, if all the trees and
the grass were red.

Outside, green's the best color.

That's right.

I never thought of it that way.

But when you do think of it, it's quite
a thought.

I bet you make your mark at Yale.

Oh. My mother wants me to go to college.

Do you believe in girls going to
college?

I guess it's all right if they want to
waste that much time before they get

married, I mean.

I'm glad you're fond of music, Mr. Day.

Oh, hello.

Look, a New Year's companion.

John enjoys the youth companion.

John.

Won't you sit down?

Oh, thank you.

It tells all about connecting batteries
and series.

John, Miss Skinner and I were talking.

Oh, that's all right. You won't bother
me.

Jiminy, that's where I made my mistake.
I didn't mix enough blue vitriol with

it.

Oh,

don't stop.

Can you play that?

I'm afraid not. Can you play Sweet
Genevieve? That's my favorite.

Not without my music.

Hymns are nice, don't you think?

I like this one.

That's funny.

The words are the same, but it's the
wrong tune.

Oh, it can't be the wrong tune. We sing
it exactly that way in church.

We don't think it that way in the
Methodist church.

You see, we're Methodists. Oh, that's
too bad.

Oh, I don't mean it's too bad that
you're a Methodist. Anybody's got a

be anything they want. But what I mean
is, we're Episcopalians.

Yes, I know.

Anyway, the words are the same.

Shall we begin?

Now.

Oh, dear.

What's wrong?

Shall we try again?

It must be my fault. Oh, no, it's my
fault. No, you're the Episcopalian.

I just remembered something.

My father was an Episcopalian. He was
baptized an Episcopalian. He was an

Episcopalian right up to the time he
married my mother.

She was the Methodist.

Oh.

Oh, well, let's try it again, then.

Well, Clarence, if you're going to
Delmonico's with us, you'd better get

dressed. Am I going to?

Jiminy!

Thank you, Father.

Be ready in just a minute, Mother.

Billy, that young lady looks about the
same age you were when I came out to

Pleasantville to rescue you.

Rescue me? You came out there to talk me
into marrying you.

It worked out just the same.

French. Oui.

No cooking like the French.

Claire, it was so nice of you to invite
Cora and Mary here their first night.

It's been a pleasure.

Mr. Day, have you always been an
Episcopalian?

I've always gone to the Episcopal
church, yes.

But you weren't baptized in Methodist or
anything, were you?

You were baptized in Episcopalian?

Come to think of it, I don't believe I
was ever baptized at all.

Claire, that's not very funny, joking
about a subject like that. I'm not

I remember now, I never was baptized.

Claire, that's ridiculous.

Everybody's baptized.

What? I'm not.

No one would keep a little baby from
being baptized.

You know, father and mother, rethink us,
both of them.

They felt that children should decide
those things for themselves.

But, Clare... I remember when I was ten
or twelve years old, Mother said I ought

to give some thought to it, but I never
got around to having it done to me.

Clare, do you know what you're saying?

Yes, I'm saying I've never been
baptized.

Then something's got to be done about it
right away.

Now, Fiddy, don't get excited over
nothing.

Why haven't you ever told me?

What difference does it make?

I've never heard of anyone who wasn't
baptized.

Even the savages in darkest Africa.

It's all right for savages and children.

But if an oversight was made in my case,
it's too late to correct it now.

What if you're not baptized? You're not
a Christian.

I can't find it. Of course I'm a
Christian.

A mighty good Christian, too.

A lot better Christian than those psalm
singers in church.

But you can't be if you won't be
baptized.

I won't be baptized and I will be a
Christian. I'll be a Christian in my own

way.

Clare, don't you want to meet us all in
heaven?

Of course, and I'm going to. But you
can't go to heaven if you're not

Ah, that's a lot of falderal.

Clarence Day, don't you blaspheme like
that.

You're coming to church with me before
you go to the office in the morning and

be baptized then and there.

Vinnie, don't be ridiculous.

If you think I'm going to stand there
and let Dr. Lloyd splash water on me at

age, you're mistaken.

Now, I'm sleepy.

Good night, Vinnie.

He hasn't been baptized. He hasn't any
name.

And the site of the church, he hasn't
any name.

That's right.

Maybe we're not even married.

We,

thine unworthy servants, do give thee
most humble and hearty thanks for all

goodness and loving kindness to us and
to all men.

We bless thee for our creation,
preservation, and all the blessings of

life. But above all, for thine
inestimable love in the redemption of

by our Lord Jesus Christ.

For the means of grace, for the hope of
glory, and we beseech thee,

give us that due sense of all thy
mercies, that our hearts may be unfaded

they are.

and that we show forth our promise, not
only with our lips, but by giving

up ourselves to thy presence, and by
walking before thee in holiness and

serenity all our days.

Through Jesus Christ our Lord, to whom
we should be, and to whom we should be

all honor and glory, world without end.

Amen.

The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ.

And the love of God.

And the fellowship of the Holy Ghost.

Be with us all evermore.

Amen.

And so my friends.

What comfort and security it gives us
when we have reached the age of

understanding to know that the rite of
baptism has not been neglected in our

infancy or youth.

Can you imagine any man who has reached
maturity with the knowledge

that he had never been baptized failing
to hasten to the holy font that his soul

might be saved.

As it says in the baptismal office.

Except a man be born of water and of the
Spirit, he cannot enter into the

kingdom of God.

He that believeth and is baptized shall
be saved.

But he that believeth not shall be
damned.

What's that follow up to? He can't be.
Which also showeth us the great benefit

we reap thereof.

He that is baptized showeth great
benefit.

But he that believeth not cannot enter
into the kingdom of God. For the

promise is to you and to your children.

Doubt ye not therefore, but earnestly
believe.

In the name of the Father, and of the
Son, and of the Holy Ghost.

Amen.

This is William Tyler Wickersham.

And this is Wilhelmina Eugenia
Wickersham.

What a lovely day for them to be
baptized.

The happiest day of my life.

You know I didn't ask Dr. Lloyd to do
that. You must have said something.

Well, I had to find out from him if we
were really married.

I am married and I'm not baptized. And
as far as I'm concerned, the whole

congregation can know it. They certainly
know it now.

That suits me.

I don't go to church to be preached at
as though I were some lost sheep.

Mayor, you don't seem to understand what
the church is for.

Minnie, if there's one place a church
should leave alone, it's a man's soul.

Well, he's going to be baptized, Cora.
You mark my word.

I just couldn't go to heaven without
Claire.

Why, I get lonesome for him even when I
go to Ohio.

It's awfully hard on a woman to love a
man like Claire so much.

Oh, men are so aggravating. They take
everything for granted.

They certainly do.

You know, I don't believe Claire has
come right out and told me he loves me

since we've been married.

Of course, I know he does because I keep
reminding him of it.

You have to keep reminding them, Cora.

Vinnie, the table isn't set for dinner
yet.

I'll be back in a minute, Cora.

We're having it after Cora and Mary go
to the train.

Their cab's coming at one o 'clock.

Cab? The horse cars go right past the
door.

But, Claire, they have those heavy bags.

Cabs are a waste of money.

Well, if dinner's going to be delayed,
I'll work on this month's bills. Where

are they? Now, Claire, it isn't fair to
go over the household accounts when

you're hungry.

Vinnie, where are those bills?

They're in the library on your desk.

I didn't know dinner was going to be
late.

No one ever tells me anything in this
house.

Back home I ride all the time. I love
horses.

The horse is my favorite animal.

What a goodness. Where have you two
been?

Clarence wanted to show me his
grandfather's house. You'll have to

finish your packing.

It won't take me long. Can I help you
pack?

Clarence.

Clarence.

Why did you deal in church today?

I... I just couldn't.

If it's because your father doesn't
kneel, you must remember he wasn't

up to kneel in church, but you were.

Has it anything to do with Mary?

I know she's a Methodist. Oh, no, Mother
Methodist, Neil. Mary told me. They

don't get up and down so much, but they
stay down longer.

Clarence, you want to kneel, don't you?
Oh, yes, I wanted to kneel today. I

tried. You saw me try, but I just
couldn't.

Is that suit of your father's too tight
for you?

No, it's not too tight.

Well, what is it?

Mother, very peculiar things have
happened to me since I started to wear

suit. I can't seem to make these clothes
do anything Father wouldn't do.

Oh, that's nonsense, Clarence.

And not to kneel in church is a
sacrilege.

Making Father's trousers, Neal, seem
more of a sacrilege.

Clarence! Do you know what happened at
Dora Wakefield's party for Mary last

night? We were playing musical chairs
and some girl sat down suddenly right on

my lap. Well, I jumped up so fast she
almost got hurt.

She was sitting on Father's trousers.

Well, Mother, I've got to have a suit of
my own.

My soul and body.

Well, you'll just have to talk to your
father about it.

I'm sure if you approach him the right
way, you know tactfully, he'll see.

Oh, excuse me.

Gracious. It didn't take you very long.

Well, I'll see about your box lunch for
the train.

Remember, It's Sunday.

I... I was hoping we could have a few
minutes together before you left.

Cora had so much to do, I wanted to get
out of her way.

Well, didn't you want to see me?

I did want to tell you how much I've
enjoyed our... friendship.

Oh, hello.

Mother told us to sit in the living room
till dinner's ready.

Not on the best offer. Hello.

Hello.

Have you ever been out on our porch? Oh,
yes.

Well, let me show it to you.

It's awfully hard to grow up in a family
with children.

My, I've never known a week to pass so
quickly.

Why, I... Yes?

Why, I... Yes?

You're going to write me when you get to
Springfield, aren't you? Of course.

If you write me first.

But you'll have something to write
about. Your trip and Aunt Judith and how

things are in Springfield. You write me
as soon as you get there.

Maybe I'll be too busy.

Maybe I won't have time.

Well, you'll find the time. Let's not
have any nonsense about that.

You'll write me first and you'll do it
right away the first day.

How do you know I'll take orders from
you?

Well, I'll show you.

Give me your hand.

Why should I? Give me your hand,
confound it.

What do you want with my hand?

I just wanted it.

What are you thinking about?

I was just thinking.

About what?

I was hoping you'd write me first,
because that would mean you liked me.

my writing first got to do with liking
you?

You do like me, then.

Of course I do.

I like you better than any girl I've
ever met.

But you don't like me well enough to
write first.

Well, I don't see how one thing's got
anything to do with the other.

But a girl can't write first because...
because she's a girl.

Well, that's nonsense. If a girl has
something to write about and a fellow

hasn't, there's no reason why she
shouldn't write first.

You know, the first few days I was here,
you'd do anything for me.

And then you changed.

You used to be a lot of fun.

Then all of a sudden you turned into an
old Sobersides.

Why, you even dress like an old
Sobersides.

What's the matter?

I just happened to remember something.

What?

Oh, I know.

It's because this is the last time we'll
be together.

Mary, please.

But, Clarence, we'll see each other in a
month when I come back.

Oh, Clarence.

Please ride me first because that'll
show me how much you like me.

Please.

I'll show you how much I like you.

Get up, get up.

it be the same any day.

Oh, you just didn't want me sitting on
your lap.

It was nice of you to do it.

my fault.

Nonsense. What's that girl trying to do
to you?

No, no, she wasn't. It was... I... I...
Well, whatever the quarrel was about,

Clarence, I'm glad you held your own.

Father, I have to have a new suit of
clothes. You've got to give me the money

for it.

Young man, do you realize that you're
addressing your father?

I'm sorry, Father. I apologize.

But you don't know how important this is
to me.

A new suit of clothes is so important.

Why should... Clarence, has your need
for a new suit

of clothes anything to do with that
young lady?

Yes, Father.

Why, Clarence.

Why, this comes as quite a shock to me.

What does, Father?

Why, you are being so grown up.

Still, I might have known if you were
going to college this fall.

Yes, you're at the age when you'll be
meeting girls.

Clarence, there are things about women
that I think you ought to know.

Sit down.

Yes, I think it's better for you to hear
this from me than to have to learn it

for yourself.

Clarence, women aren't the angels that
you think they are.

Well, now, first let me explain this to
you.

You see, Clarence, we men have to run
this world, and it's not an easy job.

It takes work, and it takes thinking.

A man has to reason things out.

Now you take a woman.

A woman thinks... No, I'm wrong right
there.

A woman doesn't think at all.

She gets stirred up.

And she gets stirred up over the most
confounded things.

Now, I love my wife just as much as any
man, but that doesn't mean that I should

stand for a lot of falderal.

By God, I won't stand for it. Stand for
what, Father?

That's the one thing I shall not submit
myself to.

Clarence, if a man thinks a certain
thing is wrong, he shouldn't do it.

If he thinks it's right, he should do
it.

Now, that has nothing to do with whether
he loves his wife or not.

Who says it has, Father?

They do.

Who, sir?

Women. They get stirred up.

And then they try to get you stirred up,
too.

But don't you let them do it, Clarence.
Don't you let them do it.

Now, if you can keep reason and logic in
the argument, a man can hold his own,

of course.

But if they can switch you, pretty soon
the argument's about whether you love

them or not.

I swear I don't know how they do it.

But don't you let them, Clarence. Don't
you let them.

I see what you mean so far, Father.

If you don't watch yourself, love can
make you do a lot of things you don't

to do. Exactly.

But if you do watch out and know just
how to handle women, then you'll be all

right.

All a man has to do is be firm.

You know how sometimes I have to be firm
with your mother.

Yes, but Father, what can you do when
they cry?

Hmm.

Well, uh, that's quite a question.

You just have to make them understand
that what you're doing is for their

I see.

Now, Clarence, you know all about women.

But, Father.

Yes, Clarence?

I thought you were going to tell me
about... About what?

About women.

Clarence, there are some things
gentlemen don't discuss.

I've told you all you need to know.

The thing for you to remember is be
firm.

When you get to Springfield, the very
first thing you...

Oh,

God!

What's the matter, Claire? What's wrong?

Sit down, Vinnie.

Oh, Claire, Cora and Mary are leaving
any moment now.

Vinnie.

You know I like to live well.

And I want my family to live well.

But this house must be run on a business
basis. I must know how much money I'm

spending and what for.

For instance, if you recall, a week ago
I gave you six dollars to buy a new

coffee pot.

Yes, because you broke the old one. You
threw it right on the floor.

I'm not talking about that.

Now, I find you're among my... It was a
pity to break that nice coffee pot,

Claire. It was imported from France. And
that little shop has stopped selling

them. But what has that... They said the
tariff wouldn't let them. And that's

your fault because you're always voting
to raise the tariff.

The tariff protects America against
cheap foreign labor.

Now, this bill... The tariff does
nothing but put up the prices, and

on everybody, especially the farmer.

Finney, I wish to heaven you wouldn't
talk about matters you don't know

about. I do, too, know about them. Miss
Gulick says that every intelligent woman

should have some opinion about... Who,
may I ask, is Miss Gulick? She's the

current events woman I told you about,
and the tickets are a dollar every

Tuesday.

Do you mean to tell me that a pack of...
Idle -minded females pay a dollar

apiece to hear another female gavel
about the events of the day?

Listen to me if you want to know
anything about the events of the day.

But you get so excited, Claire.

And besides, Miss Gulick says that our
president, whom you're always

prays to God for guidance. Vinnie, what
happened to that six dollars?

What six dollars?

I gave you six dollars to buy a new
coffee pot.

Now I find that you apparently got one
at Lewis and Congress and charged it.

Here's the bill. One coffee pot, five
dollars.

So you owe me a dollar and you can hand
it right over.

I'll do nothing of the kind.

What did you do with that six dollars?

Well, Claire, I can't tell you now,
dear.

Why didn't you ask me at the time?

I give up.

Wait a minute.

I spent four dollars and a half for that
new umbrella.

Now we're getting somewhere.

One umbrella, $4 .50.

And that must have been the week I paid
Mrs. Tobin for two extra days washing.

Mrs. Tobin. That's $2 more.

$2. That makes $6 .50. And that's
another $0 .50 you owe me. I don't owe

anything. What you owe me is an
explanation of where my money's gone.

I do the best I can to keep down
expenses.

You know yourself, Cousin Phoebe spends
twice as much as we do.

Don't talk to me about your Cousin
Phoebe.

You talk about your own relatives
enough.

That's not fair, Vinnie.

When I talk about my relatives, I
criticize them.

I can't even speak of Cousin Phoebe. You
can speak of her all you want to. But I

won't have Cousin Phoebe or anyone else
dictating to me how to run my house.

I didn't say a word about her dictating.

Claire, you know she isn't that. You
said... You said... I don't know what

said now.

You never stick to the point.

Now, we're going over this account book.

Item by item.

I find here a bill for $38.

I don't know what you expect of me.

I tire myself out chasing up and down
those stairs all day long, trying to

after your comfort to bring up our
children.

I do the mending and the marketing.

Now you want me to be an expert
bookkeeper, too.

Vinnie, I want to be reasonable, but
can't you understand?

I'm doing all this for your own good.

Oh.

Well, I suppose I'll have to go ahead
just paying the bills and hoping I've

enough money in the bank to meet them.

But it's all very discouraging.

I'll try to do better, Claire.

Well, that's all I'm asking.

Well, I'll make out the checks and sign
them.

But maybe I haven't any right to sign
those checks since in the sight of the

Lord I haven't any name.

That's right.

Claire, you make those checks good,
you'll have to be baptized right away.

Vinnie, the bank doesn't care whether
I've been baptized or not. Well, I care.

And no matter what Dr. Lloyd said, I'm
not sure we're really married.

Vinnie, we have four children.

If we're not married now, we never will
be.

Clare, Dr. Lloyd said this morning...
That's all, Vinnie.

Uh, Clarence, you better go tell Whitney
to watch for the cab.

Not before you give me that dollar and a
half.

What dollar and a half? The dollar and a
half you owe me. I don't owe you any

dollar and a half.

I gave you money to buy a coffee pot for
me, and somehow it turned into an

umbrella for you.

Why, Clarence Day, what kind of man are
you?

Quibbling about a dollar and a half when
your immortal soul is in danger.

And what's more, if you...

All right, all right.

Thank you, Claire.

Now the accounts are all straight again.

What were you doing down there? I'm
setting up this new burglar alarm. I

invented it myself.

Have you got any money you can lend me?
No, you owe me 30 cents now.

Well, I'll give you my stamp collection
and my piece of John Wilkes Booth's

finger. How much?

Enough to get a new suit of clothes.

If you can wait a month until I hear
from the patent office in Washington, I

be rich.

I can't wait that long.

Maybe I could get it sooner. I'm going
to look into something else tomorrow.

Wanted an energetic young man to sell
household necessity. Liberal commission.

Apply 312 with...

John, let me have this job.

Why should I give you my job? They're
hard to get. I've got to get a new suit

clothes. Maybe I could get the job for
both of us. I'll ask the man.

The cab's here, Father.

Oh, thank you, Whitney.

Vinnie, Cora, the cab's here.

John.

Go up and get their bags. Yes, sir.

Here's the lunch for the train, sir.

Take it out to the cab.

Who's that one? It's Ellen. Delia left
yesterday.

I don't know where your mother finds
them. Now, Vinnie, don't you let Clara

worry about us. We have plenty of time.

Take the bags right on out, John. Yes,
sir. Well, goodbye, Clarence. It was so

nice to see you again.

Goodbye, Whitney.

Now you be a good boy. Goodbye, Cousin
Cora. Goodbye, Harlan.

Goodbye. Keep out of mischief. Come
along, everybody. Don't keep the cab

waiting. Cabs cost money. If there's one
thing Mr. Day can't stand, it's to keep

a cab waiting.

There's nothing waiting to do. There's a
waiting room at the Grand Central Depot

just for that.

Mary, aren't you even going to shake
hands with me? I don't think I'd better.

You may remember that when I get too
close to you, you feel contaminated.

Mary, you're going to write to me,
aren't you?

Are you going to write first?

No, Mary.

There are times when a man must be firm.

Mary, Mother says you better hurry out
before Father starts yelling.

It's Sunday.

Goodbye, John.

I'm very happy to have made your
acquaintance. Thank you.

May I help you? No, thank you.

Take care of yourself.

Goodbye, Mr. Day. Goodbye, Mary.

Goodbye, Mrs. Day. Goodbye, Mary.

Goodbye. Goodbye.

Goodbye, Cousin Claire. Goodbye, Cora.

Goodbye, Cora.

Goodbye.

It wouldn't work, so he fixed it. We're
going to put it back in the dining room

after Father goes to the office.

Are there burglars around?

Everywhere. Oh.

To love, honor, and succor my father and
my mother.

Why do you have to learn that?

Because if I don't, I'll go to hell.

Father's going to hell. He is not.

Yes, he is, because he isn't baptized.
He'll go to hell and burn for a thousand

years. He won't. He won't. He'll be in a
lake of fire and brimstone, and a

thousand devils with pitchforks will be
poking...

She says she doesn't want any breakfast.

Now, why does your mother do that to me?

She knows it upsets my day when she
doesn't come down to breakfast.

A special delivery, sir.

Thank you.

Thank you. Where's John this morning?

John had his breakfast early, Father,
and went out to see about something.

See about what?

Well, John and I thought we'd work this
summer and earn some money.

Good. Work never hurt anyone. It's good
for them.

But if you're going to work, work hard.

King Solomon had the right idea about
work.

Whatever thy hand findeth to do, Solomon
said, do thy dog onest.

Hmm.

Well, I don't understand this at all.

Here's a letter from some woman I never
even heard of.

Oh, Father.

Oh, God!

What is it, Father?

This woman claims that she sat on my lap
and that I didn't like it.

Huh.

Looks like curiosity.

Oh. I only opened your letter as a
matter of curiosity.

Yes, go on.

Why, this gets worse and worse.

It just turns into a lot of sentimental,
lovey -dovey mush.

This is someone's idea of a practical
joke.

What's the matter, Claire? What's wrong?

Nothing wrong.

Just a poor letter.

How are you feeling, Vinnie?

I thought you needed me.

If you don't, I'll go back to bed.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

Come sit down and get some food in you.
Do your good. Build up your strength.

Here, sit down, sit down.

Here, what's this one's name? Nora.
Nora, get Mrs. Day some bacon and eggs.

No, Nora.

Bring me a cup of tea up to my room.

Yes, ma 'am.

Oh, Vinnie, it's just weak to give in to
an ailment.

I notice when you have a headache, you
yell and groan and swear enough.

Well, that's to prove to the headache
that I'm stronger than it is.

I think I've caught some kind of germ.

Some of my friends have had to send for
the doctor.

The doctor? Oh, poppycock.

But, Claire, dear, when people are ill,
you have to do something.

Certainly I have to do something. Cheer
them up. That's the way to cure them.

How would you go about cheering them up?

I?

I'd tell them, bah.

What have I done now?

Hey,

I didn't mean to upset you.

I was just trying to help you.

You know, when you take your bed, I have
a confounded, lonely time around here.

So when I see you getting it into your
head that you're not feeling well, I

to do something about it.

Just because some of your friends have
given in to this, there's no reason why

you should imagine you're ill. Claire,
stop.

Get out of this house and go to your
office.

you get the job? Yes, for both of us.
Look, I've got it with me. What is it?

Medicine. Medicine?

You took a job for us to go out and sell
medicine?

But it's wonderful medicine.

Look what it cures.

A sovereign cure for colds, coughs,
catarrh, asthma, quincy, and sore

Poor digestion, summer complaint, colic,
dyspepsia, heartburn, and shortness of

breath.

Lumbago, rheumatism, heart disease,
giddiness, and women's complaints.

Nervous prostration, St. Vitus dance,
jaundice, lagrip, proud flesh, pink eye,

seasickness, and pimples.

It's made from a secret formula known
only to Dr. Bartlett. We get 25 cents

commission on every bottle we sell, and
he's giving us the territory of all

Manhattan Island.

Well, lots of fathers and mothers'
friends have some of those diseases.

Let's start out by calling on them. Yes.

Oh, what if they ask us if we use it at
our house?

Yes, it would be better if we could say
we did.

Excuse me?

Oh, is that the tea for Mrs. Day? Yes.
Well, I'll take it up to her.

Thank you.

Right away now while it's hot.

What's the matter with Mother?

I don't know. She was just complaining.

Say, it says here it's good for women's
complaints.

Here.

Yes, sir. Chesapeake and Ohio and 8.

New York Central, three quarters.

I'd like to see Mr. Day about the
Morrison etched bomb.

Today's very busy this morning.

We'll have to wait.

Where's Father?

Well, Master Whitney, have you come to
pay us a visit? Where's Father?

He's busy in his office with a customer.

Mr. Whitney!

But, Mr. Day, the president of the firm
is... Father!

You have to come home right away.

What's the meaning of this?

Who sent you down here? Your mother?

No, sir. Mother's ill.

She's terribly ill.

Did the doctor send you for me? No, sir.
It was Margaret.

Margaret? Margaret says you're to come
home right away and no nonsense.

Perkins, go down and stop the first cab
you see.

A cab, sir?

For you, Mr. Day?

Yes, I want a cab and no nonsense.

Yes, sir.

I'm sorry, Mr. Hopkins.

All right.

Yeah.

Get up there. You hear me? Get up.

Oh, doctor.

How is Mrs. Day? She's a pretty sick
woman.

What's wrong with her?

Well, do you know her, don't you?

What did Mrs. Day have for breakfast
this morning?

Not a thing. I tried to get her to eat
something, but she wouldn't. I can't

understand it.

Understand what?

These violent attacks of nausea. It's
almost as though she were poisoned.

Poisoned?

Let me take your cab. I'll try not to be
gone more than 10 or 15 minutes. And,

Mr. Day, you're not to go into her room.

You'd better get her well.

Right away, or you'll hear from me.

Turn west on 7th Street.

Yes, yes.

his mother?

I don't know.

Well, she better be good and sick or
father may be mad at me for getting him

here. Especially in a cab.

Is your father come? Yes, just now.
Where are you going, Margaret?

I have to go for the minister.

I guess the minister's coming to baptize
father so I won't have to go to hell.

You can't be baptized in a house. You've
got to have water.

We have lots of water.

Not the right kind.

Is Mother better, Father?

How can I tell? She wouldn't let me in
the room with her.

These confounded doctors never know
what's the matter with anybody.

Mother's going to get well, isn't she?

Of course she's going to get well.

Father, may we come in? It's lonesome
without Mother.

Yes, it is, Harlan.

It's lonesome.

Come in, boys.

What have you been doing, Harlan?

Nothing. They won't let me upstairs.

What about you, Whitney? I was supposed
to learn the rest of my catechism.

Will you hear me, Father?

Yes, Whitney, I'll hear you.

Start here.

How many parts are there in a sacrament?

Two. The outward visible sign and the
inward spiritual grace.

What is the outward visible sign or form
in baptism?

Water, wherein the person is baptized in
the name of...

You haven't been baptized, have you,
Father?

Whitney, what is the outward visible
sign?

Water. Where in the person?

Where in the person?

You don't know it well enough, Whitney.
You'd better go and study it some more.

Do you want me to read to you, Harlan?

Father, are they going to put you into
hell?

Whitney, take Harlan with you.

What's the world coming to?

Everybody's sending little doctors.

Doctors don't do you any good.

Only make you feel worse.

All poppycock.

We must all be quiet.

Mrs. Day is very ill.

I know she's ill. Go up and see if she
needs anything.

And what are you doing out of the house?

Sent for the minister.

The minister?

He'll be right in. He's paying off the
cap.

I was deeply shocked to learn the
serious

nature of Mrs. Day's illness.

Will you take me up to her?

She's resting now. She can't be
disturbed.

The doctor will be back in a minute.

Mrs. Day has been a tower of strength in
the parish.

Everyone liked her so much.

Yes, she was a fine woman.

I wish to heaven you wouldn't talk about
Mrs. Day as if she were dead.

Is the doctor back yet?

No. Does she need him? Well, she's kind
of restless.

She's talking in her sleep and twisting
and turning.

Doctor, it seems to me that was a pretty
long ten minutes.

See here, Mr. Day, if I'm to handle this
case, how can you handle it if you're

out of the house?

Who is this? It's Dr. Summers.

How do you do? I felt that Mrs. Day's
condition warranted my getting Dr.

Summers here as soon as possible for
consultation.

I hope that meets with your approval.

Why, yes, of course.

Anything that can be done.

Upstairs, Doctor.

Pardon me.

Mrs. Day is in good hands now, Mr. Day.

There's nothing you and I can do at the
moment to help.

Dr. Lloyd.

Yes?

There's something that's troubling Mrs.
Day's mind.

Oh?

I think you know what I refer to.

Yes. You mean the fact that you've never
been baptized.

Yes, I gathered that you knew about it
from your sermon last Sunday.

But let's not get angry.

I think something had better be done
about it.

Yes, Mr. Day?

When the doctors get through up there, I
want you to talk to Mrs. Day. I want

you to tell her something. Why, I'd be
glad to. You're just the man to do it.

She shouldn't be upset about this.

I want you to tell her that my being
baptized would just be a lot of

nonsense.

But, Mr. Day... Oh, she'd take your word
on a thing like that.

And we both must do everything we can to
help her now.

But the solution is so simple.

It would take only your consent to be
baptized.

That's out of the question.

And I'm surprised that a grown man like
you would suggest such a thing.

What, Doctor?

How is she? What have you decided?

Is there a room we could use for our
consultation?

Yes, my library.

Doctor.

Dr. Summers, this isn't serious, is it?
After we've had our consultation, we'll

talk to you, Mr. Day.

But surely... Rest assured, Dr. Summers
will do everything that is humanly

possible. We'll try not to be long.

Tell me, is Dr.

Summers... He's very highly thought of,
isn't he? Oh, yes.

Lavinia's seriously... If anyone could
help her, he could.

Don't you think?

Very fine physician.

But there is a greater help, ever
present in the hour of need.

Let us turn to him in prayer.

Let us kneel and pray.

Let us kneel and pray.

O Lord, look down from heaven.

Behold, visit and relieve this thy
servant who is grieved with sickness.

Have mercy on her, O Lord.

Have mercy on this miserable sinner.

Forgive her and extend thy accustomed...
She's not a miserable sinner and you

know it.

Oh, God!

You know Vinnie is not a miserable
sinner.

She's a fine woman.

She shouldn't be made to suffer.

It's got to stop, I tell you. It's got
to stop.

Have mercy, I say.

Have mercy, I tell you.

What's the matter, Claire?

What's wrong?

Vinnie.

Vinnie, what are you doing down here?
You shouldn't be out of bed.

You get right back upstairs.

I heard you call.

Do you need me?

Vinnie, I know now how much I need you.

Get well, Vinnie. I'll be baptized. I
promise. I'll be baptized.

I'll do anything.

Oh, Claire.

We'll go to Europe. Just we two.

You won't have to worry about the
children or the household accounts.

Vinnie.

Don't worry, Mr. Day. She'll be all
right now.

Bless you for what you have done. What
did I do?

You promised to be baptized.

I did?

Oh, God!

Isn't it drafty here, Mother? Shall I
get your coat, Mother? No, thank you.

I'm quite comfortable, thank you. Come
on now, let's stay together. Holland,

don't you get lost again.

Aren't the hats lovely this year?

Ostrich feathers.

You wouldn't wear that hat, would you,
Mother?

I think that's very pretty.

I think they're all pretty.

Oh, I do need some pink silk dress.

Oh, isn't this applique beautiful?

Just arrived from Paris, madam. It's
charming.

What are you looking for, mother?

Oh, I'm just shopping.

I think I'll just take a plain one. But
this is the very latest. We've only had

them in a few days.

Remember, mother, this is your first day
out. You mustn't get too tired.

No, I'm saving myself, dear. I have to.
Cousin Cora's coming tomorrow.

She is? Does father know about it? Not
yet.

Is Mary coming, too? Yes, dear.

Helen, don't touch things.

I'll bet you knew it. No, I'm excited.
Not tomorrow.

Aren't the sleeves a little long? It
fits well across the shoulders.

Now about the sleeves.

Do we have any more of this material?

Yes, we do. Thank you.

This one is genuine imitation Dresden.

The original design by Durier.

John, isn't this the darlings thing?

It's exactly what I've always wanted.
How much is this lovely pug dog?

Fifteen dollars, ma 'am.

Fifteen dollars?

Gee whiz, Mother, we could buy a real
-life bloodhound for five dollars. Oh,

isn't he perfectly adorable?

Oh, I shouldn't.

I know I shouldn't.

Mrs. Day!

Oh, Mrs.

Whitehead. How nice to see you. Are you
quite recovered? Almost.

This is my first day out. We've missed
you at the church. You remember Mr.

Morley? How do you do, Mrs. Day? How do
you do? Mr. Morley preached the Sunday

Dr. Lloyd was ill.

I can't tell you how much I enjoyed your
sermon.

Even my husband enjoyed your sermon.

We've just come from the board meeting
of the foreign missions.

I'm taking Mr. Morley home to lunch. I
had to drop in here to pick up a

purchase. I won't be a minute.

Is your parish in the city?

Yes, it's on the outskirts. My church is
in Audubon Park.

Oh, way up there.

Are you acquainted in Audubon Park?

No, I don't believe we know a soul
there.

Mr. Morley.

Would this be possible?

My husband, Mr. Day.

If we lower the collar, it'll be a very
fine fit.

You won't find a better suit to close in
the city for $15. Oh, it's not the

price. It's the money.

Thank you for holding it for me. You're
welcome.

Goodbye, Mrs. Day. I hope we meet again
soon.

Goodbye. It was very pleasant meeting
you again. I think it was divine

providence. I shall be delighted to be
of service.

Goodbye, Mr. Molly. Goodbye.

Oh, no, it's against the rules.

Hello.

What did you bring home more medicine
for?

Dr. Butler paid us off, didn't he? Oh,
yes.

Oh, Jiminy, you scared me.

I've got to take $15 right down to
McCreary's. I bought a suit there this

morning, and I said I'd have the money
this afternoon.

Gee, that's too bad.

What's too bad?

Well, you see, Clarence... What?

Dr. Bartlett paid us off in medicine.

Oh, God!

Well, he thanked us, too, for our
services to mankind.

But my suit, I've got to have it
tomorrow. And besides, they're making

alterations. I've got to have $15.

Maybe you could offer them 15 bottles of
medicine.

Oh, they wouldn't take it. McCreary's
don't sell medicine.

Father!

Good afternoon, sir. How's your mother,
Clarence? Oh, the ride this morning did

her a lot of good. She'll be well enough
to go to church with us next Sunday.

Ah, fine.

Father, have you noticed I haven't been
kneeling down in church lately?

Don't let your mother catch you at it.
Then I have to have a new suit of

right away.

That doesn't make sense. I can't do
anything in your clothes that you

do. Well, if my old clothes make you
behave yourself, I don't think you want

wear anything else. Oh, no, you're you
and I'm me. I want to be myself. I mean,

suppose I should want to kneel down in
front of a girl.

Why, in heaven's name, should you want
to do a thing like that? Well, I've got

to propose to a girl sometime.

Clarence. Not right away, but for $15 I
can get a good suit of clothes.

Clarence, you're beginning to talk as
crazy as you... Hello, Vinnie.

You're feeling better today, huh?

Much better, thank you, Clare.

You don't have to hurry home from the
office every day like this.

With business the way it is, it's no use
going to the office at all.

Yes, you do look better, Vinnie. What
did you do today?

I got a carriage and took the boys for a
ride. And we stopped in at McCreary.

Oh, Claire, I've the most wonderful news
for you.

Who do you think I met?

Mr. Morley.

Morley? Never heard of him.

Remember that nice young minister who
substituted for Dr. Lloyd one Sunday?

Oh, yes.

Bright young fellow.

Preached a good, sensible sermon.

Short one, too.

Ought to be more ministers like him.
Well, Claire, his parish is in Audubon

Park. You know, way up above Harlem.

Nobody knows you up there. You'll be
perfectly safe.

Safe?

Vinnie, what the devil are you talking
about? I've gone all over everything

Mr. Morley, and he's agreed to baptize
you.

Oh, he has.

The young whippersnapper. Very nice of
him. We can go up there any morning. We

don't even have to make an appointment.

Who said I was going to be baptized at
all?

Why, Claire.

You did.

Now, Vinnie.

You gave me your promise. Your sacred
promise. You said I'd be baptized. I

promised I'd be baptized. Well, what if
I did?

Claire!

Aren't you a man of your word?

Vinnie, we all thought you were dying.

So naturally I said that to cheer you
up.

As a matter of fact, the doctor told me
that's what cured you.

Well, it seems to me pretty ungrateful
of you to press this matter any further.

My being well has nothing to do with it.
You gave me your word. You gave the

Lord your word. And you're going to
march yourself up to Mr. Morley's church

some morning before you go to the office
and be christened. If you think for one

minute... What in the name of heaven is
that? If you think I'm going to let you

add the sin of breaking your solemn and
sacred promise... I demand to know what

that repulsive object is.

It's perfectly plain what it is. It's a
pub dog.

What is it doing in this house?

I wanted it and I bought it.

You spent good money for that? Claire,
don't try to change the subject.

How much did you pay for that atrocity?
I didn't pay anything for it. I charged

it.

Charged it? I might have known. How much
was it?

Fifteen dollars.

Fifteen dollars?

For that eyesore?

Don't you call this lovely work of art
an eyesore?

It would look beautiful sitting on a red
cushion by the fireplace in the living

room. If that sits in the living room, I
won't.

Furthermore, I don't even want it in the
same house with me.

Get it out of here.

Claire?

You're not going to get out of this room
until you set a date for your baptism.

I'll tell you one thing.

I'll never be baptized as long as that
hideous monstrosity is in this house.

All right.

All right.

Clarence.

That pug dog goes back this afternoon
and he's christened first thing in the

morning. You heard him, didn't you,
Clarence? You heard him say that he'd be

baptized as soon as I got this pug dog
out of the house.

You hurry right back to McCreary's with
it and be sure they credit us with $15.

Oh, Mother, while we were at McCreary's,
I happened to see a suit I'd like very

much, and the suit was only $15. Well,
Clarence, I'm afraid your suit will have

to wait until after I get your father
christened. No, I meant that since the

suit costs just the same as the pug dog,
if I exchange the pug dog for the

suit... Why, yes.

Then the suit wouldn't cost your father
anything.

Why, how...

Right of you, Clarence, to think of
that.

I'd better start right away before
McCreary's closes. Yes.

Now, let's see.

If we're going to take your father all
the way to Audubon Park...

Clarence, on your way back, you stop at
the livery stable and tell them to have

a cab here at 8 o 'clock tomorrow
morning. Mother, a cab? Do you think you

to? We can't walk all the way to Audubon
Park. But you know what a cab does to

fathers. This is a very important
occasion.

All right. Get one of their best cabs,
the kind they use at funerals. Well,

those cost $2 an hour, and if father
gets mad... Well, if your father starts

argue in the morning, you remember. Oh,
he agreed to it. We both heard him.

You'll notice Clarence is returning the
pug dog.

That's a sign you're getting your
faculties back.

Don't dawdle, Clarence.

Vinnie, it's good to hear you singing
again.

But your smile so pure and sweet Makes
my happiness complete Makes me

falter at your feet Sweet Marie Sweet
Marie

On the way uptown, I stopped in at
Tiffany's and bought you a little

Thought you might like it.

Claire!

What a beautiful ring!

I'm glad it pleased you.

Oh, Claire!

I don't know how to thank you.

If it's thanks enough for me, just to
have you up and around again.

You know, when you're ill, Vinnie, this
house is like a tomb.

There's no excitement.

That's the loveliest ring you ever
bought me.

Now that I have this, you needn't buy me
any more rings.

Well, if you don't want any more.

What I'd really like now is a nice
diamond necklace.

Vinnie, do you know how much a diamond
necklace costs?

Yes, I know, Claire, but don't you see?
You're giving me this shows I mean a

little something to you. Now a diamond
necklace. Good heaven.

If you don't know by this time how I
feel about you, we've been married for

years, and I've loved you every minute
of it.

What did you say, Claire?

I said we've been married for 20 years,
and I've loved you every minute of it.

But if I have to buy out jewelry stores
to prove it, if I haven't shown it to

you in my words and actions, I might as
well... Well... What have I done now?

It's all right, Claire.

I'm just so happy.

Happy?

You said you loved me.

And this beautiful ring, that's
something else I didn't expect.

Oh, Claire, I love surprises.

That's another thing I've never
understood about you, Vinnie.

Now, I like to know what to expect. Then
I prepare to meet it. Yes, I know,

Clare, but life would be pretty dull if
we always knew what was coming.

Well, it's certainly not dull around
here.

In this house, you never know what's
going to hit you tomorrow.

Every day the Imadell knows my secret.

Every daisy in the dell Knows my secret

Knows it well And yet I dare

not tell Sweet Marie

Got one market in the house.

At home, they call me Maggie, sir.

All right, Maggie.

If her name's Margaret, that's a good
sign. Maybe she'll stay a while.

Do you know, boys, your mother used to
be just the same about cooks as she is

about maids. Never could keep them for
some reason.

Well, one day about 14 years ago... Yes,
it was right after you were born, John.

My, you were a homely baby.

No idea.

Yes. Have a good night?

Yes, thank you, Claire.

Sit down, Vinnie.

Sit down, boys.

Thank you, parents.

Well, seems to me everyone's all dressed
up this morning.

What's on the program for this fine day?

Well, this afternoon, May Lewis's mother
is giving a party for everyone in May's

dancing class.

Harlan's going to dance. I don't want to
go, Mama.

Harlan, don't you want to go to a party
and get ice cream and cake?

When you get a little older, you won't
object to girls wanting to kiss you.

Willie Clarence.

This is for you, Mr. Day. Where shall I
put it? Oh, that's for me, I think. Take

it upstairs, Maggie. Wait a minute,
Maggie. Bring it here. Let's see it.

See, it's for me, Father. Clarence Day,
Jr. I mean, look.

That's for McClary's.

And it's marked charge. What is it?
Clare, it's all right. It's nothing for

to worry about.

Well, at least I think I should know
what's being charged to me. What is it?

Clare, stop. your fussing. It's a new
suit of clothes for Clarence, and it

costing you a penny.

It's marked charge $15.

It's costing me $15.

And I told Clarence... Claire, can't you
take my word it isn't costing you a

penny?

I'd like to have you explain why it
isn't.

Because Clarence took the pug dog back
and got the suit instead.

Of course, and they'll charge me $15 for
the suit.

Nonsense, Claire. We gave them the pug
dog for the suit, don't you see?

Then they'll charge me $15 for the pug
dog.

But, Claire, they can't. We haven't got
the pug dog. We sent that back.

Well... Hmm?

But... Well, now, wait a minute, Vinnie.

The suit... But... Well, there's
something wrong with your reasoning.

Well, Claire, I'm surprised at you when
you're supposed to be so good at

figures. That's perfectly clear to me.

Watch me for one thing or the other.

Don't you let them.

Well, McCreary's aren't giving away
suits and they aren't giving away pug

Why, it should be clear to a child that
if Clarence sent the pug dog back,

they... Well... I will not

have that botanical freak in this room.

John, have you been going around this
town selling medicine?

Yes, Mother.

Dog medicine?

No, Mother, not dog medicine.

This letter from Mrs. Sprague says you
sold her a bottle of this medicine and

that her little boy gave some of it to
their dog and it killed him.

Now she wants $10 from us for a new dog.

Here, let me see that letter.

Well, we shouldn't have given it to a
dog. It's for humans.

Why, it's Bartlett's beneficent bomb
made from a secret formula.

Have you been going around among our
friends and neighbors selling some

nostrum? But it's good medicine, Father.
I can prove that by Mother.

Vinnie, what do you know about this?
Well, nothing, Claire. But I'm sure

No, I mean that day Mother was... That's
enough.

You're going to every house where you
sold a bottle of that concoction and buy

it all back.

But it's a dollar a bottle.

I don't care how much it is.

Here. I'll give you the money now.

How many bottles did you sell?

A hundred and twenty -eight.

A hundred and twenty -eight?

Claire, I always told you John would
make a good businessman.

Young man, you'll have to come down to
my office.

that medicine.

$128.

$10 more for Mrs. Sprague's dog. That's
$138.

Thank you, Vinnie. But it's all coming
out of your allowance.

That means that you will not get another
penny until the whole $138 is paid up.

I won't have it, I tell you. I won't
have it. Now, Claire.

Don't let them in. Claire, hush up.
They'll hear you. Tell them to get back

that cab and drive right on to Ohio.

As if we could turn our own relatives
away.

But they're extravagant enough to take
cabs when horse cars run right by our

door. Now, you be quiet and behave
yourself.

John, come help with the baggage.

Why do they always have to pounce on us
without any warning?

Cora. Mary.

Well, it's so good to have you back
again.

How are you, Vinnie? We've been so
worried about you. Oh, I'm fine now.

Did you have fun in school? Oh, yes,
fun.

What? John!

My, you're still growing up. Thank you,
good boy. John, go get the package.

There's Whitney. Whitney! How are you,
darling?

Fine, thank you.

And little Harley. Hello.

Have you been a good boy?

How do you do? Come and sit down and
have some breakfast with us. Oh, we had

breakfast at the depot. Well, we've
practically finished ours. I haven't

finished my breakfast.

Well, then sit down, Claire.

Come and have a cup of coffee anyway.

Mary, sit over there. Cora, Maggie,
clear those places.

My, my, this seems so natural. Claire,
don't let your kippers get cold.

Maggie, serve some coffee.

Yes, ma 'am.

Where's Clarence?

He must be upstairs moving his thing so
you can have his room again.

Oh, Vinnie, we can't stay overnight.

Grandpa Ebbes has been sailing very
fast, and that's why I have to hurry

We're leaving on the five o 'clock train
this afternoon.

Well, Cora, it certainly is good to see
you again.

Well, who can that be?

Well, this time it can't be another
special delivery letter for Clarence.

While you were in Springfield, our
postman was kept pretty busy.

It's the cab, ma 'am.

Cab? What cab?

have this to take us to Audubon Park.

Oh? Who's going to Audubon Park?

We all are.

Cora, the most wonderful thing has
happened.

Claire is going to be baptized this
morning.

Finny, what are you saying?

I'm saying you're going to be baptized
this morning.

I am not going to be baptized this
morning or any other morning.

You promised yesterday that as soon as I
sent that pug dog back, you'd be

baptized.

I never said anything remotely like
that.

Clarence was right there and heard you.

That's why I ordered the cab.

The cab.

Vinnie.

You send that right back.

I'll do nothing of the kind.

I'm going to see that you go to heaven.

I can't go to heaven in a cab.

Well,

you can start in a cab.

I'm not sure they'll ever let you into
heaven. But I know they won't unless

you're baptized.

They can't keep me out of heaven. Heaven
on a technicality.

Claire, stop quibbling.

You may as well face it. You've got to
make your peace with God.

Until you stirred him up, I had no
trouble with God.

Harlan, Whitney, come get your Sunday
hat.

Clarence, John. Yes, Mother? Hurry,
we're ready to go.

Oh, my prayer book.

Harlan, come let me fix your tie.

Benny, are you mad?

Witness this indignity? Why, Claire,
they'll be proud of you.

I suppose Harlan is to be my godfather.

Vinnie, I won't go through with this
thing.

That's final.

Claire, if you feel that way about it...
I do.

Then we won't take the children with us.

I'm not talking about the children. I'm
ready, Mother.

Oh, John.

Vinnie, I haven't time for anything like
that this morning. I've got to take

John down to my office with me and give
him the money to buy back that dog

medicine. But it wasn't dog medicine,
sir.

Young man, we're starting downtown this
minute.

You'll do no such thing.

You gave me your sacred promise that day
I almost died. Yes, and she would have

died if we hadn't given her some of that
medicine. That proves it's good

medicine.

You gave your mother some of that dog
medicine?

John, you didn't.

Yes, we did, Mother. We put some in your
tea that morning.

Oh, John.

Do you realize you might have killed
your mother?

You did kill Mrs. Sprague's dog.

give considerable thought as to how you
would be punished for this. But,

Clare... No, Vinnie.

When I think of that day, we might have
lost you.

You're all right now, thank heaven.

But what I went through that afternoon,
the way I felt, I'll never forget it.

You've forgotten it already.

What do you mean?

That was the day you gave me your sacred
promise.

Yes, but I wouldn't have given you my
promise if I hadn't thought you were

dying. And you wouldn't have almost died
if John hadn't given you that dog

medicine. Don't you see?

Well, the whole thing is illegal.

Suppose I had died.

It wouldn't make any difference to you.

You don't care whether we meet in heaven
or not.

You don't care whether you ever see me
and the children again.

Now, Vinnie, you're not being fair to
me.

It's all right, Claire.

If you don't love us enough, there's
nothing we can do about it.

But that has nothing to do with it.

I love my family as much as any man.

All my life, I struggled in work. Just
you... Dad, there's that cab.

Vinnie, you're not well enough to go all
the way to Audubon.

Oh, I'm well enough if we ride.

But that trip would take all morning.

And those cabs cost a dollar an hour.

This is one of their best cabs. This
costs two dollars an hour.

Well, then why aren't you...

Good morning, Mr. Day. Going to the
office?