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1
00:00:03,187 --> 00:00:05,619
I got no legroom back here.
Move your seat forward.
2
00:00:05,690 --> 00:00:07,155
It's as far as it goes.
3
00:00:07,224 --> 00:00:10,623
There's a mechanism. You just pull it
and throw your body weight.
4
00:00:10,695 --> 00:00:12,956
I pulled it, it doesn't go.
5
00:00:13,030 --> 00:00:16,622
If you want the legroom, say you want
the room. Don't blame the mechanism.
6
00:00:16,701 --> 00:00:20,237
All right, Dad, we're five blocks
from the house. Sit sideways.
7
00:00:20,304 --> 00:00:23,168
Like an animal. Because of her,
I have to sit like an animal.
8
00:00:23,240 --> 00:00:25,934
Serenity now! Serenity now!
9
00:00:26,010 --> 00:00:27,600
What is that?
10
00:00:27,678 --> 00:00:29,803
Doctor gave me
a relaxation cassette.
11
00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:31,675
When my blood pressure
gets too high...
12
00:00:31,749 --> 00:00:34,841
the man on the tape tells me to say,
"Serenity now."
13
00:00:35,119 --> 00:00:36,743
Are you supposed to yell it?
14
00:00:36,821 --> 00:00:39,014
The man on the tape
wasn't specific.
15
00:00:40,191 --> 00:00:42,589
What happened to the screen door?
It blew off again?
16
00:00:42,660 --> 00:00:44,785
I told you to fix that thing.
17
00:00:44,862 --> 00:00:47,328
Serenity now!
18
00:00:52,870 --> 00:00:56,701
I told Bobby and Lisa we'd try that new
Chinese-Spanish place on Saturday.
19
00:00:56,774 --> 00:00:59,001
Thought we had tickets
to the Knicks home opener.
20
00:00:59,076 --> 00:01:02,111
Well, I thought this would be more fun
so I gave the tickets away.
21
00:01:02,179 --> 00:01:04,110
What?
22
00:01:04,181 --> 00:01:06,044
All right, fine.
23
00:01:06,283 --> 00:01:07,873
Are you mad at me?
24
00:01:07,952 --> 00:01:12,284
No, I love a good Chinese-Spanish
whatever it is.
25
00:01:12,356 --> 00:01:15,619
You know, I've never seen you mad.
26
00:01:15,693 --> 00:01:16,782
I get peeved.
27
00:01:16,861 --> 00:01:18,553
- Mad.
- Miffed.
28
00:01:18,629 --> 00:01:20,356
- Mad.
- Irked?
29
00:01:21,032 --> 00:01:24,727
I would like to see you
get really mad.
30
00:01:28,105 --> 00:01:29,934
Why does she want you to be mad?
31
00:01:30,007 --> 00:01:31,802
She says I suppress my emotions.
32
00:01:31,876 --> 00:01:33,739
So, what do you care
what she thinks?
33
00:01:34,512 --> 00:01:36,375
Good body.
34
00:01:37,181 --> 00:01:39,681
She probably gets that impression
because you're cool.
35
00:01:39,750 --> 00:01:43,286
You're under control. Like me.
Nothing wrong with that.
36
00:01:43,687 --> 00:01:46,585
But I get upset. I've yelled.
You've heard me yell.
37
00:01:46,657 --> 00:01:49,885
Not really. Your voice kind of raises
to this comedic pitch.
38
00:01:50,928 --> 00:01:52,256
Hey.
39
00:01:52,329 --> 00:01:55,660
Kramer, I am so sick of you coming
in here and eating all of my food.
40
00:01:55,733 --> 00:01:59,064
Now, shut that door
and get the hell out of here.
41
00:02:05,242 --> 00:02:07,708
What is that, a new bit?
42
00:02:08,379 --> 00:02:09,503
I told you.
43
00:02:09,580 --> 00:02:13,013
Any of you wanna come and help me
fix my father's screen door in Queens?
44
00:02:13,084 --> 00:02:15,414
Sorry, I'm fixing a screen door
in the Bronx.
45
00:02:16,087 --> 00:02:17,814
- I'll do it.
- Really, you wanna come?
46
00:02:17,888 --> 00:02:19,853
Yeah, I love going to the country.
47
00:02:25,930 --> 00:02:28,521
- Where are they going?
- Fix a screen door in Queens.
48
00:02:29,667 --> 00:02:31,530
That's funny.
49
00:02:31,735 --> 00:02:33,632
Hey, listen,
what are you doing Saturday?
50
00:02:33,704 --> 00:02:35,431
Not going to the Knick game.
51
00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:39,068
I need somebody to go with me
to Mr. Lippman's son's bar mitzvah.
52
00:02:39,143 --> 00:02:41,939
You know, if you don't bring a guest,
they save on catering.
53
00:02:42,012 --> 00:02:46,515
- Should be able to buy a cheaper gift.
- Oh, I don't think that's possible.
54
00:02:50,788 --> 00:02:54,483
And get a little closer
because I can't see the screen door.
55
00:02:54,592 --> 00:02:56,523
Yeah.
56
00:02:57,027 --> 00:02:59,925
- Perfect.
- Dad, the hinges are all rusted here.
57
00:02:59,997 --> 00:03:02,156
That's why the wind keeps blowing
the door off.
58
00:03:02,233 --> 00:03:05,769
I hate that old door. Throw it out!
59
00:03:05,836 --> 00:03:08,063
Serenity now.
60
00:03:08,139 --> 00:03:11,231
Might be time to just let her go, Frank.
She's worked hard for you.
61
00:03:11,308 --> 00:03:13,467
- Will you put her to rest for me?
- Oh, yeah.
62
00:03:13,544 --> 00:03:16,010
- I'll take good care of her.
- Okay.
63
00:03:22,052 --> 00:03:26,612
And get George to put those boxes
in the garage.
64
00:03:27,291 --> 00:03:30,155
- Dad, what is all this?
- It's junk.
65
00:03:30,227 --> 00:03:33,524
My computers. I've been selling them
for two months now.
66
00:03:33,597 --> 00:03:35,221
Shut up.
67
00:03:36,167 --> 00:03:37,825
You're selling computers?
68
00:03:38,269 --> 00:03:42,135
Two months ago, I saw
a provocative movie on cable TV.
69
00:03:42,206 --> 00:03:46,003
It was called The Net,
with that girl from the bus.
70
00:03:46,210 --> 00:03:51,441
I did a little reading and I realized
it wasn't that far-fetched.
71
00:03:51,515 --> 00:03:54,948
Dad, do you know what it takes
to compete with Microsoft and IBM?
72
00:03:55,019 --> 00:03:57,952
Yes, I do.
That's why I've got a secret weapon.
73
00:03:59,290 --> 00:04:01,358
My son.
74
00:04:05,162 --> 00:04:08,789
Damn it, they gave me cream.
I asked for nonfat milk.
75
00:04:09,867 --> 00:04:12,026
I think they have one percent
over there.
76
00:04:12,102 --> 00:04:16,798
One percent?
They can kiss one percent of my ass.
77
00:04:17,374 --> 00:04:20,136
Okay, Jerry, enough.
I'm not buying it.
78
00:04:20,211 --> 00:04:22,677
You're damn right
you're not buying it.
79
00:04:23,480 --> 00:04:26,549
You shouldn't have to try.
It's just being open.
80
00:04:26,617 --> 00:04:30,153
I'm open.
There's just nothing in there.
81
00:04:31,655 --> 00:04:33,655
- Oh, you think I'm lying?
- I think you are.
82
00:04:33,724 --> 00:04:35,689
- Well, I'm not.
- Yes, you are. Liar.
83
00:04:35,759 --> 00:04:37,486
- Oh, stop it.
- Okay, liar.
84
00:04:37,561 --> 00:04:38,719
That's enough.
85
00:04:38,929 --> 00:04:40,155
That was good.
86
00:04:40,231 --> 00:04:42,265
Really? It felt good.
87
00:04:43,567 --> 00:04:45,430
Congratulations, Mr. Lippman.
88
00:04:45,803 --> 00:04:46,892
Oh, Elaine.
89
00:04:48,572 --> 00:04:50,572
My boy's a man today.
Can you believe it?
90
00:04:50,641 --> 00:04:54,905
- He's a man.
- Oh, congratulations, Adam.
91
00:05:00,184 --> 00:05:01,512
I'm a man.
92
00:05:05,356 --> 00:05:07,856
- Tongue?
- Yeah.
93
00:05:11,428 --> 00:05:14,258
I didn't try that till I was 23.
94
00:05:14,632 --> 00:05:17,530
Well, this kid's not just a man,
he's a man's man.
95
00:05:18,269 --> 00:05:20,200
And I think he's been telling
his friends.
96
00:05:20,271 --> 00:05:24,205
I got invitations
to six more bar mitzvahs.
97
00:05:25,643 --> 00:05:30,009
Hello? Yeah, this is Jerry Seinfeld.
No. No. No.
98
00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:32,671
I do not wanna stop over
in Cincinnati.
99
00:05:32,750 --> 00:05:35,011
Well, then you upgrade me.
100
00:05:35,085 --> 00:05:39,121
That's right, you should thank me.
Goodbye.
101
00:05:39,189 --> 00:05:41,621
Hey, I'm flying first class.
102
00:05:41,892 --> 00:05:43,425
Where did that come from?
103
00:05:43,494 --> 00:05:45,585
Patty showed me how to get mad.
104
00:05:45,663 --> 00:05:47,424
You got a problem with that?
105
00:05:48,432 --> 00:05:50,124
- No.
- Good.
106
00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:52,325
All right, relax, tough guy.
107
00:05:52,403 --> 00:05:55,301
I gotta get out to my father's garage.
Help him sell computers.
108
00:05:55,372 --> 00:05:59,101
The two of you working in that garage
is like a steel-cage death match.
109
00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:05,579
- Kramer?
- Yeah.
110
00:06:05,649 --> 00:06:06,977
What are you doing?
111
00:06:07,051 --> 00:06:09,278
Oh, I'm putting up Frank's
screen door.
112
00:06:09,353 --> 00:06:11,444
This beauty has got a little life
in her yet.
113
00:06:11,522 --> 00:06:13,089
What do you need it for?
114
00:06:13,157 --> 00:06:16,658
The cool evening breezes
of Anytown, U.S.A.
115
00:06:17,161 --> 00:06:19,092
See how this baby closes.
116
00:06:20,331 --> 00:06:22,331
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
117
00:06:24,768 --> 00:06:27,530
- Morning, Ma.
- You're late.
118
00:06:29,807 --> 00:06:31,932
- Morning, Dad.
- I'm not Dad in the work place.
119
00:06:32,009 --> 00:06:33,804
My professional name
is Mr. Costanza...
120
00:06:33,877 --> 00:06:36,070
and I will refer to you
as Costanza.
121
00:06:36,146 --> 00:06:38,146
- Morning, Braun.
- Hey, George.
122
00:06:39,183 --> 00:06:41,342
Two cream, no sugar.
123
00:06:42,419 --> 00:06:44,453
What is Lloyd Braun doing here?
124
00:06:45,189 --> 00:06:47,723
- Your mother recommended him.
- Yeah, of course she did.
125
00:06:47,791 --> 00:06:49,256
All I ever heard growing up is:
126
00:06:49,326 --> 00:06:51,326
"Why can't you be more like
Lloyd Braun?"
127
00:06:51,395 --> 00:06:53,292
You know he was in
a mental institution?
128
00:06:53,564 --> 00:06:55,325
I didn't read his résumé.
129
00:06:57,134 --> 00:07:00,533
Another sale, Mr. Costanza.
Chalk me up on the big board.
130
00:07:02,973 --> 00:07:06,338
- What is this?
- This is your lagging.
131
00:07:06,410 --> 00:07:10,310
- Good work, Braun.
- Good for you, Lloyd.
132
00:07:12,449 --> 00:07:16,986
So, Adam, I just talked to your father
and apology accepted.
133
00:07:17,254 --> 00:07:21,723
I'm not apologizing. It was great.
I told everyone.
134
00:07:22,226 --> 00:07:25,227
Yeah, I know.
By the way, could you do me a favor...
135
00:07:25,295 --> 00:07:29,991
and tell Mitchell Tanenbaum that
I'll be unable to attend this Saturday?
136
00:07:30,334 --> 00:07:31,992
Are you free Friday night?
137
00:07:33,537 --> 00:07:36,470
I am, but that is not the point.
138
00:07:36,540 --> 00:07:41,839
You are 13
and I am in my early 20s.
139
00:07:42,346 --> 00:07:44,573
But I'm a man. The rabbi said so.
140
00:07:44,648 --> 00:07:46,079
No, you are not a man.
141
00:07:46,150 --> 00:07:48,480
It takes a long time
to become a man.
142
00:07:48,552 --> 00:07:50,950
I mean, half my friends
aren't even there yet.
143
00:07:52,289 --> 00:07:56,189
Well, if I'm not a man,
then this whole thing was a sham.
144
00:07:56,260 --> 00:07:58,385
First he said
I was gonna get great gifts...
145
00:07:58,462 --> 00:08:00,621
and then somebody
gives me Boggle.
146
00:08:01,799 --> 00:08:04,367
- I renounce my religion.
- Who wants cookies?
147
00:08:04,435 --> 00:08:07,766
As of this moment,
I am no longer Jewish. I quit.
148
00:08:09,973 --> 00:08:11,938
Walnuts.
149
00:08:12,876 --> 00:08:14,807
You're late again, Costanza,
so listen up.
150
00:08:15,946 --> 00:08:18,446
Starting tonight,
we're having a little sales contest.
151
00:08:18,515 --> 00:08:21,641
The loser gets fired,
the winner gets a Waterpik.
152
00:08:21,718 --> 00:08:24,548
You're not giving away
our Waterpik!
153
00:08:24,621 --> 00:08:26,154
Serenity now.
154
00:08:26,223 --> 00:08:29,588
You know what?
It doesn't matter, because I quit.
155
00:08:29,660 --> 00:08:31,125
I guess your mother was right.
156
00:08:31,195 --> 00:08:33,820
You never could compete
with Lloyd Braun.
157
00:08:38,335 --> 00:08:42,599
You want to sell computers?
I will show you how to sell computers.
158
00:08:47,444 --> 00:08:50,604
Hello, Mr. Finerman.
You wanna buy a computer?
159
00:08:50,681 --> 00:08:53,341
No? Why not?
160
00:08:54,418 --> 00:08:57,487
All right, I see.
Good answer. Thank you.
161
00:09:00,891 --> 00:09:03,459
Serenity now!
162
00:09:05,429 --> 00:09:08,362
Adam, you don't become a man
overnight.
163
00:09:08,432 --> 00:09:13,469
Look at your father. It takes time,
patience, experience...
164
00:09:13,537 --> 00:09:17,095
several careers
of varying success.
165
00:09:17,174 --> 00:09:20,801
These are things
that I look for in a man.
166
00:09:20,878 --> 00:09:25,438
Well, that does me a lot of good.
"Early 20s."
167
00:09:26,583 --> 00:09:28,981
Well, I'm sorry, sir, I tried.
168
00:09:29,052 --> 00:09:32,053
So that's the type of guy
you're looking for?
169
00:09:32,122 --> 00:09:34,952
I guess so. Why?
170
00:09:38,695 --> 00:09:42,822
- What is this?
- Anytown, U.S.A.
171
00:09:44,468 --> 00:09:47,560
Hello. Is Kramer home?
172
00:09:47,638 --> 00:09:49,467
Oh, hey.
173
00:09:50,374 --> 00:09:51,532
Hello, neighbor.
174
00:09:51,608 --> 00:09:53,801
Boy, those azaleas
are really coming in nicely.
175
00:09:53,877 --> 00:09:56,639
Oh, you gotta mulch. You've got to.
176
00:09:56,713 --> 00:09:59,976
- You barbecuing tonight?
- Right after the fireworks.
177
00:10:07,057 --> 00:10:08,749
So where do you wanna eat tonight?
178
00:10:08,825 --> 00:10:10,517
How about going back
to La Caridad?
179
00:10:10,594 --> 00:10:14,994
Again?
How much flan can a person eat?
180
00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:17,892
Jerry, you've been yelling at me
all afternoon.
181
00:10:17,968 --> 00:10:21,435
Well, I don't think more flan
is the answer.
182
00:10:21,505 --> 00:10:23,698
- Maybe I should just leave.
- Maybe?
183
00:10:23,774 --> 00:10:26,570
- Goodbye.
- Double goodbye.
184
00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:32,441
Hey, buddy.
185
00:10:33,550 --> 00:10:35,413
Hey, happy New Year.
186
00:10:35,485 --> 00:10:38,053
Y'all come back real...
187
00:10:41,758 --> 00:10:43,792
- Did you and Patty just break up?
- Yeah.
188
00:10:43,860 --> 00:10:48,158
In fact, she broke up with me.
And I don't wanna talk about it.
189
00:10:49,433 --> 00:10:54,197
Then you're free tonight. I heard about
this great place called La Caridad.
190
00:10:54,638 --> 00:10:56,899
That's the last thing she said to me.
191
00:10:56,974 --> 00:11:00,043
She wanted to go there also,
but I wasn't in the mood.
192
00:11:00,110 --> 00:11:04,044
- Oh, what is the matter?
- It's Patty.
193
00:11:04,114 --> 00:11:07,377
Jerry, you break up with a girl
every week.
194
00:11:11,888 --> 00:11:14,149
What is this salty discharge?
195
00:11:15,692 --> 00:11:18,488
Oh, my God, you're crying.
196
00:11:18,562 --> 00:11:20,653
This is horrible.
197
00:11:21,398 --> 00:11:23,398
I care.
198
00:11:28,872 --> 00:11:32,567
Patty won't call me back.
I don't know if I can live without her.
199
00:11:32,643 --> 00:11:34,608
She's really gotten to you,
hasn't she?
200
00:11:34,678 --> 00:11:37,042
- I don't know what's happening to me.
- It's simple.
201
00:11:37,114 --> 00:11:40,672
You let out one emotion,
all the rest will come with it.
202
00:11:40,751 --> 00:11:43,012
It's like Endora's box.
203
00:11:43,086 --> 00:11:46,644
That was the mother on Bewitched.
You mean Pandora.
204
00:11:46,723 --> 00:11:49,792
Yeah, well, she had one too.
205
00:11:51,495 --> 00:11:53,620
Jerry, can I talk to you for a minute?
206
00:12:00,437 --> 00:12:03,005
That's it. That's it,
I warned you kids.
207
00:12:03,073 --> 00:12:05,334
I told you not to play in front
of my house.
208
00:12:05,409 --> 00:12:08,000
This time, I'm keeping it.
209
00:12:08,879 --> 00:12:11,675
And you're not getting your rock
back either.
210
00:12:11,748 --> 00:12:13,679
Hall urchins.
211
00:12:17,754 --> 00:12:21,187
Are you still down in the dumps?
Come on, it's just a chick.
212
00:12:21,258 --> 00:12:23,519
You ever heard of a little thing
called feelings?
213
00:12:23,593 --> 00:12:26,161
Well, I got just the thing
to cheer you up.
214
00:12:26,229 --> 00:12:28,354
A computer.
215
00:12:28,999 --> 00:12:31,966
You could check porn
and stock quotes.
216
00:12:33,303 --> 00:12:35,030
Porn quotes.
217
00:12:35,105 --> 00:12:37,696
I'm so lucky to have
a friend like you, George.
218
00:12:38,775 --> 00:12:41,070
I ever tell you how much I love you?
219
00:12:45,515 --> 00:12:48,948
- What?
- I love you, George.
220
00:12:49,019 --> 00:12:51,883
- Come here.
- I'm already here. I'm here. I'm here.
221
00:12:51,955 --> 00:12:54,649
You know what, if you want
a computer, call me. I gotta go.
222
00:12:54,725 --> 00:12:57,623
Go wherever you want,
I'm still gonna love you.
223
00:12:58,061 --> 00:13:00,459
Look what they did.
Look what they did to my house.
224
00:13:00,530 --> 00:13:02,120
I turn my back for two seconds...
225
00:13:02,199 --> 00:13:04,494
and they put shaving cream
all over the door.
226
00:13:04,568 --> 00:13:06,431
Yeah, I see you!
227
00:13:06,503 --> 00:13:08,264
I'm gonna teach these kids
a lesson.
228
00:13:08,338 --> 00:13:10,338
Where's that hose
I put under your sink?
229
00:13:10,407 --> 00:13:12,998
Hose under my sink.
I love you, Kramer.
230
00:13:13,076 --> 00:13:15,770
- I love you too. And George...
- I don't wanna hear it.
231
00:13:15,846 --> 00:13:18,779
When I give you the signal,
turn this water on full blast.
232
00:13:18,849 --> 00:13:22,350
- Signal? What signal?
- I don't know, I'll yell hoochie mama.
233
00:13:22,419 --> 00:13:24,919
All right, if I do it,
will you buy a computer?
234
00:13:24,988 --> 00:13:26,749
On the signal, George.
On the signal.
235
00:13:26,823 --> 00:13:28,584
Only if you buy. I gotta make a sale.
236
00:13:28,658 --> 00:13:30,953
- I love you, Costanza.
- Will you shut up?
237
00:13:31,027 --> 00:13:34,688
Now, George! Turn on the faucet.
George, turn on the faucet.
238
00:13:34,865 --> 00:13:41,564
Hoochie mama. Hoochie mama.
Hoochie mama.
239
00:13:42,806 --> 00:13:45,101
So, now, the other Lippman
kissed me.
240
00:13:45,342 --> 00:13:47,433
Oh, sure.
They're Jewish and you're a shiksa.
241
00:13:47,511 --> 00:13:49,636
- What?
- It means non-Jewish woman.
242
00:13:49,713 --> 00:13:53,408
I know what it means. But what does
being a shiksa have to do with it?
243
00:13:53,483 --> 00:13:54,641
You've got shiks-appeal.
244
00:13:54,718 --> 00:13:57,309
Jewish men love a woman
that's not like their mother.
245
00:13:57,387 --> 00:14:00,012
- Oh, that's insane.
- I'll tell you what's insane.
246
00:14:00,090 --> 00:14:03,091
The price that I could get you
on a new desktop computer.
247
00:14:03,493 --> 00:14:05,993
- I am not buying a computer from you.
- There's porn.
248
00:14:06,730 --> 00:14:08,559
Even so.
249
00:14:12,202 --> 00:14:15,100
Don't get me wrong, Mr. Lippman.
I'm very flattered...
250
00:14:15,172 --> 00:14:19,606
that you found me attractive enough
to lunge at me.
251
00:14:19,676 --> 00:14:22,677
But the only reason you like me
is because I'm a shiksa.
252
00:14:22,746 --> 00:14:25,076
That's simply not true.
253
00:14:25,148 --> 00:14:27,512
If you weren't Jewish,
you wouldn't be interested.
254
00:14:27,584 --> 00:14:30,517
- You are wrong. I'll prove it.
- Oh, no, don't.
255
00:14:30,587 --> 00:14:32,416
I renounce Judaism.
256
00:14:37,527 --> 00:14:38,787
What happened to you, pal?
257
00:14:38,862 --> 00:14:41,157
Joey Zanfino and some
of the neighborhood kids...
258
00:14:41,231 --> 00:14:44,425
they ambushed me with a box
of Grade A's.
259
00:14:44,501 --> 00:14:48,264
- Are you all right?
- Oh, no, I'm fine. Fine. Serenity now.
260
00:14:49,506 --> 00:14:52,473
Serenity now. Serenity now.
261
00:14:52,542 --> 00:14:55,167
So you're using Frank's
relaxation method?
262
00:14:55,245 --> 00:14:59,475
Jerry, the anger, it just melts right off.
Serenity now.
263
00:15:06,022 --> 00:15:07,384
Serenity now.
264
00:15:11,695 --> 00:15:15,026
- Hey, what happened to you?
- Serenity.
265
00:15:15,866 --> 00:15:17,263
Well...
266
00:15:17,534 --> 00:15:20,660
you are not gonna believe this.
Now Lippman has renounced.
267
00:15:20,737 --> 00:15:22,998
This shiksa thing
is totally out of control.
268
00:15:23,073 --> 00:15:26,040
What is with you people?
269
00:15:28,278 --> 00:15:31,677
- What are you looking at?
- Sit down, Elaine.
270
00:15:31,748 --> 00:15:35,011
Oh, no, Jerry, I can't take any more
gentle sobbing.
271
00:15:35,085 --> 00:15:37,710
I've been thinking about what it means
to be complete.
272
00:15:37,787 --> 00:15:38,876
Do you have an apple?
273
00:15:38,955 --> 00:15:41,649
Look at us, hurtling through space
on this big blue marble.
274
00:15:41,725 --> 00:15:43,816
Or a nectarine.
I would love a nectarine.
275
00:15:43,894 --> 00:15:46,189
Looking everywhere
for some kind of meaning.
276
00:15:46,263 --> 00:15:48,763
Why am I in such a fruit mood?
Banana.
277
00:15:48,832 --> 00:15:51,196
When all the while,
the real secret to happiness...
278
00:15:51,268 --> 00:15:53,359
has been right here in front of us.
279
00:15:55,038 --> 00:15:57,106
- What?
- Elaine...
280
00:15:58,108 --> 00:16:00,733
Jerry, I found a way
to beat Lloyd Braun.
281
00:16:00,810 --> 00:16:03,606
I buy the computers myself,
I store them in your apartment.
282
00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:07,011
Then after I win the contest, I bring
them all back, I get my money back.
283
00:16:07,083 --> 00:16:08,878
It's brilliant.
284
00:16:09,052 --> 00:16:11,177
Wait, what's wrong with your leg?
285
00:16:12,789 --> 00:16:14,914
I'm asking Elaine to marry me.
286
00:16:21,264 --> 00:16:23,992
I'll store these over
at Kramer's apartment.
287
00:16:24,067 --> 00:16:25,657
It's all right.
288
00:16:27,237 --> 00:16:28,326
All fine.
289
00:16:28,672 --> 00:16:30,399
Elaine...
290
00:16:31,041 --> 00:16:35,635
Jerry, I've got a lot going on
with Lippman right now.
291
00:16:35,712 --> 00:16:39,213
- Lippman?
- Yeah, and him too.
292
00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:41,146
What?
293
00:16:41,217 --> 00:16:43,182
Oh, yeah.
294
00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:47,345
I think George is calling me,
so I'm gonna go and give him a hand.
295
00:16:47,424 --> 00:16:49,822
- Come on. Come on!
- Can I help you?
296
00:16:49,893 --> 00:16:52,985
Stay. Stay. Stay.
297
00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:56,923
Hey, Braun,
Costanza's kicking your butt.
298
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:58,931
Watch how it's done.
299
00:17:02,439 --> 00:17:04,973
Oh, hello, Mr. Vandelay.
300
00:17:06,209 --> 00:17:08,004
Would you like to buy a computer?
301
00:17:08,311 --> 00:17:10,675
Oh, really? Two dozen.
302
00:17:11,648 --> 00:17:13,238
Costanza, you're white hot.
303
00:17:13,516 --> 00:17:17,108
If you'd like to make call,
please hang up and...
304
00:17:19,055 --> 00:17:21,350
Hey, Braun,
I got good news and bad news.
305
00:17:21,424 --> 00:17:25,551
- They're both the same. You're fired.
- Costanza, you won the Waterpik.
306
00:17:25,628 --> 00:17:28,288
You're not gonna give away
that Waterpik.
307
00:17:28,365 --> 00:17:31,491
You wanna bet?
Serenity now. Serenity now.
308
00:17:32,202 --> 00:17:36,705
You know, you should tell your dad
that "serenity now" thing doesn't work.
309
00:17:36,773 --> 00:17:39,569
It just bottles up the anger
and then, eventually...
310
00:17:39,642 --> 00:17:41,141
- you blow.
- What do you know?
311
00:17:41,211 --> 00:17:44,212
- You were in the nut house.
- What do you think put me there?
312
00:17:44,681 --> 00:17:47,716
I heard they found a family
in your freezer.
313
00:17:47,784 --> 00:17:49,852
Serenity now...
314
00:17:49,919 --> 00:17:51,611
insanity later.
315
00:17:53,523 --> 00:17:55,682
What happened here, Kramer?
316
00:17:55,759 --> 00:17:58,191
- Serenity now. Serenity now.
- Kramer.
317
00:17:59,796 --> 00:18:02,296
Jerry. I didn't hear you come in.
318
00:18:02,866 --> 00:18:07,232
Yeah, yeah, yeah, the children,
they've done some redecorating.
319
00:18:09,305 --> 00:18:11,202
You don't look well.
320
00:18:11,408 --> 00:18:14,341
That's odd, because I feel perfectly
at peace with the world.
321
00:18:14,411 --> 00:18:16,308
Eggs, you.
322
00:18:18,348 --> 00:18:22,646
Oh, I'm sorry. Look at me,
I stepped on your last rose.
323
00:18:22,719 --> 00:18:25,754
Jerry, come on.
Don't get so upset about it.
324
00:18:25,822 --> 00:18:28,789
There's always next spring.
Would you excuse me for a moment?
325
00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:31,922
Serenity now!
326
00:18:31,995 --> 00:18:35,360
Jerry, I did it. I beat Braun.
327
00:18:35,432 --> 00:18:36,556
Serenity now.
328
00:18:36,633 --> 00:18:38,997
Come on. Lend me a hand
with the computers?
329
00:18:39,069 --> 00:18:41,729
Serenity now!
330
00:18:41,805 --> 00:18:45,341
Why couldn't you squeeze one
of those stupid rubber balls...
331
00:18:45,408 --> 00:18:46,736
to get your stress out?
332
00:18:46,810 --> 00:18:50,903
Why did you have to destroy
25 computers?
333
00:18:51,448 --> 00:18:54,210
George, you listen to me...
334
00:18:54,551 --> 00:18:56,380
I owe you one.
335
00:18:57,487 --> 00:18:58,781
All right?
336
00:19:04,761 --> 00:19:07,022
He's incorrigible.
337
00:19:07,797 --> 00:19:10,092
- You wanna talk about it?
- Please don't tell me...
338
00:19:10,166 --> 00:19:12,564
you love me again, Jerry.
I can't handle it.
339
00:19:12,635 --> 00:19:16,296
George, letting my emotions out
was the best thing I've ever done.
340
00:19:16,372 --> 00:19:19,100
Sure, I'm not funny anymore...
341
00:19:19,442 --> 00:19:24,570
but there's more to life than making
shallow, fairly obvious observations.
342
00:19:25,715 --> 00:19:27,146
How about you?
343
00:19:28,118 --> 00:19:29,845
All right.
344
00:19:31,454 --> 00:19:32,714
Here it goes.
345
00:19:37,494 --> 00:19:41,462
Rabbi, is there anything I can do
to combat this shiks-appeal?
346
00:19:41,531 --> 00:19:45,362
Elaine, shiks-appeal is a myth.
Like the yeti...
347
00:19:45,435 --> 00:19:49,904
or his North American cousin,
the Sasquatch.
348
00:19:50,540 --> 00:19:52,164
Well, something's going on here...
349
00:19:52,242 --> 00:19:55,277
because every able-bodied Israelite
in the county...
350
00:19:55,345 --> 00:19:57,436
is driving pretty strong
to the hoop.
351
00:19:57,514 --> 00:20:01,209
Elaine, there's much you don't
understand about the Jewish religion.
352
00:20:01,284 --> 00:20:06,185
For example, did you know
that rabbis are allowed to date?
353
00:20:06,723 --> 00:20:08,347
Well, what does that have to do...?
354
00:20:08,424 --> 00:20:10,253
You know, a member
of my congregation...
355
00:20:10,326 --> 00:20:12,690
has a time-share in Myrtle Beach.
356
00:20:12,762 --> 00:20:14,727
Perhaps if you're not too busy...
357
00:20:14,797 --> 00:20:17,798
we could wing on down
after the High Holidays.
358
00:20:18,668 --> 00:20:20,463
Elaine?
359
00:20:21,004 --> 00:20:22,696
Lainey?
360
00:20:24,107 --> 00:20:26,038
So that's it.
361
00:20:26,109 --> 00:20:28,973
All of my darkest fears...
362
00:20:29,045 --> 00:20:31,340
and everything I'm capable of.
363
00:20:31,414 --> 00:20:33,038
That's me.
364
00:20:39,055 --> 00:20:42,124
Well, good luck with all that.
365
00:20:42,592 --> 00:20:44,489
Where are you going?
366
00:20:44,561 --> 00:20:47,221
I thought I could count on you
for a little compassion.
367
00:20:47,297 --> 00:20:49,194
I think you scared me straight.
368
00:20:51,267 --> 00:20:54,495
- All right, Jerome, I'm in.
- What?
369
00:20:54,571 --> 00:20:56,332
Maybe we should get married.
370
00:20:56,406 --> 00:21:00,237
Maybe everything we need
is right here in front of us.
371
00:21:00,310 --> 00:21:02,537
Jer, let's do it.
372
00:21:03,179 --> 00:21:05,304
I tell you, I don't see it happening.
373
00:21:06,182 --> 00:21:08,079
What?
What happened to the new Jerry?
374
00:21:08,151 --> 00:21:09,878
He doesn't work here anymore.
375
00:21:11,554 --> 00:21:14,714
Oh, well, that's just great!
376
00:21:15,158 --> 00:21:17,920
- I love you, Jerry.
- Right back at you, slick.
377
00:21:23,299 --> 00:21:26,732
You know, all these years...
378
00:21:26,869 --> 00:21:29,995
I've always wanted to see
the two of you get back together.
379
00:21:30,073 --> 00:21:33,233
Well, that's because you're an idiot.
380
00:21:44,087 --> 00:21:45,654
You single-handedly...
381
00:21:45,722 --> 00:21:48,586
brought Costanza and Son
to the brink of bankruptcy.
382
00:21:48,658 --> 00:21:50,623
Well, what about
all the Lloyd Braun sales?
383
00:21:50,693 --> 00:21:54,524
He was crazy.
His phone wasn't even hooked up.
384
00:21:56,332 --> 00:21:58,263
He just liked ringing that bell.
385
00:21:58,801 --> 00:22:02,428
I told you to clean up this garage.
386
00:22:02,505 --> 00:22:05,233
I have to put my car in.
387
00:22:05,475 --> 00:22:07,065
This is a place of business.
388
00:22:07,143 --> 00:22:10,872
I told you never to come in here.
Serenity now.
389
00:22:11,347 --> 00:22:13,381
All right.
390
00:22:16,152 --> 00:22:19,710
Dad, you really should lay off
the serenity-now stuff.
391
00:22:19,789 --> 00:22:21,447
So, what am I supposed to say?
392
00:22:22,292 --> 00:22:24,155
Hoochie mama.
393
00:22:26,562 --> 00:22:30,462
Move your crap, I'm coming in.
394
00:22:32,368 --> 00:22:34,629
No, you're not.
395
00:22:35,772 --> 00:22:38,670
Hoochie mama. Hoochie mama.
30801
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