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1
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Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com
2
00:00:08,404 --> 00:00:09,421
Hey, Mom.
3
00:00:09,481 --> 00:00:11,312
Oh, honey,
thanks for picking up the rest
4
00:00:11,337 --> 00:00:13,750
- of the wedding party things.
- You're welcome.
5
00:00:13,775 --> 00:00:16,117
Did they give you any
hassle about the coupons?
6
00:00:16,142 --> 00:00:18,484
I didn't use them.
It was too embarrassing.
7
00:00:18,509 --> 00:00:20,367
Honey... Honey...
8
00:00:20,875 --> 00:00:23,515
I spent all day cutting those out.
9
00:00:23,716 --> 00:00:25,562
Oh, God, look at the time.
10
00:00:26,062 --> 00:00:28,062
I gotta get ready. I look like a nut!
11
00:00:28,087 --> 00:00:30,398
Ken's gonna be here, and I look crazy.
12
00:00:31,005 --> 00:00:32,296
Honey, what do you think?
13
00:00:32,321 --> 00:00:34,453
Put one of these on the piano?
14
00:00:36,102 --> 00:00:37,756
Oh, you got a piano.
15
00:00:37,781 --> 00:00:39,475
- Yes.
- That's fun.
16
00:00:39,500 --> 00:00:41,554
Came with the, uh, jazz trio.
17
00:00:42,493 --> 00:00:45,203
You know, I'm going to walk
down the aisle to Coltrane.
18
00:00:45,228 --> 00:00:46,238
Oh, that's nice.
19
00:00:46,263 --> 00:00:47,909
Yeah, Ken picked it out.
20
00:00:47,934 --> 00:00:49,006
It seems right,
21
00:00:49,031 --> 00:00:50,070
- you know?
- Mm-hmm.
22
00:00:50,095 --> 00:00:51,828
Ah, speak of the devil.
23
00:00:53,414 --> 00:00:54,773
Ken?
24
00:00:54,798 --> 00:00:56,070
Are you on the plane, honey?
25
00:00:56,095 --> 00:01:00,099
Well, about that, Christine,
um, I missed my flight.
26
00:01:00,124 --> 00:01:03,092
This carpet recall thing is taking
a lot longer than I thought.
27
00:01:03,117 --> 00:01:04,858
Oh, honey, I'm sorry.
28
00:01:04,883 --> 00:01:07,381
Bottom line is I'm on the last flight,
29
00:01:07,406 --> 00:01:09,506
and I don't know if it'll
even get me there on time.
30
00:01:09,531 --> 00:01:11,405
I'm thinking maybe
once I'm on the flight,
31
00:01:11,430 --> 00:01:12,631
I could buy Internet,
32
00:01:12,656 --> 00:01:15,475
and we could Skype to each other and,
33
00:01:16,048 --> 00:01:18,061
I don't know, maybe we can, uh,
34
00:01:18,235 --> 00:01:21,534
exchange vows over Skype.
35
00:01:21,559 --> 00:01:22,999
- I-I don't know.
- Oh, honey,
36
00:01:23,024 --> 00:01:25,131
that never works on a plane. You know?
37
00:01:25,156 --> 00:01:26,959
That's not gonna work out at all.
38
00:01:28,109 --> 00:01:29,499
Well...
39
00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:32,827
Uh...
40
00:01:33,828 --> 00:01:35,022
You know what, honey?
41
00:01:36,550 --> 00:01:38,651
We can get married anytime.
42
00:01:39,190 --> 00:01:41,389
It sounds like
you're really needed there.
43
00:01:41,414 --> 00:01:42,846
I want you to stay there.
44
00:01:42,871 --> 00:01:44,532
I mean, are you sure?
45
00:01:44,557 --> 00:01:46,337
I mean, really, are you okay with that?
46
00:01:46,362 --> 00:01:47,376
You know what?
47
00:01:47,401 --> 00:01:50,066
I'll change this into a
housewarming party, honey.
48
00:01:50,091 --> 00:01:52,550
- Oh, Christine.
- You know, what's the difference?
49
00:01:52,575 --> 00:01:54,872
Honey, I wanted you to
have your special wedding,
50
00:01:54,897 --> 00:01:56,345
like we planned.
51
00:01:56,370 --> 00:01:59,127
Oh, honey, I have you,
and that's all I want.
52
00:01:59,856 --> 00:02:01,690
You take care of that, and...
53
00:02:02,348 --> 00:02:03,881
it'll all work out.
54
00:02:03,906 --> 00:02:05,823
Christine, you are amazing, baby.
55
00:02:05,944 --> 00:02:07,940
- Have a good housewarming.
- Take care.
56
00:02:07,965 --> 00:02:09,626
Good luck with the recall, honey.
57
00:02:09,651 --> 00:02:11,714
- Love you, my bride.
- Love you.
58
00:02:13,409 --> 00:02:14,846
I'm sorry, Mom.
59
00:02:14,871 --> 00:02:16,142
Oh.
60
00:02:16,620 --> 00:02:18,620
Things happen, honey, in life.
61
00:02:19,095 --> 00:02:20,270
You okay?
62
00:02:21,116 --> 00:02:22,159
Yeah.
63
00:02:22,184 --> 00:02:23,386
Okay, good.
64
00:02:23,768 --> 00:02:25,659
Well, since there's no wedding,
I guess I'll get
65
00:02:25,684 --> 00:02:27,338
an early start on my
gig at the hospital,
66
00:02:27,363 --> 00:02:29,214
- if that's okay.
- Yeah.
67
00:02:29,239 --> 00:02:31,474
Hey, honey,
I'm really glad you're doing that.
68
00:02:31,499 --> 00:02:33,027
You really cheer those kids up.
69
00:02:33,052 --> 00:02:35,230
They really need something
like that right now.
70
00:02:35,255 --> 00:02:37,659
And you're good at it,
and you're an artist, honey.
71
00:02:37,956 --> 00:02:39,706
Thanks, Mom. Thank you.
72
00:02:44,683 --> 00:02:45,771
Hi.
73
00:02:46,949 --> 00:02:47,964
Hey, Doctor.
74
00:02:47,989 --> 00:02:49,003
Hey, patient.
75
00:02:50,167 --> 00:02:51,488
Hello, Nurse.
76
00:02:52,014 --> 00:02:53,091
Afternoon to you...
77
00:02:55,000 --> 00:03:01,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
78
00:03:02,066 --> 00:03:04,136
Hello, Tyler!
79
00:03:04,558 --> 00:03:06,017
How are you?
80
00:03:06,042 --> 00:03:08,034
Well, I'm in the hospital, so...
81
00:03:13,889 --> 00:03:14,889
Hello?
82
00:03:15,151 --> 00:03:17,683
Yeah, she's here.
I'll let you talk to her.
83
00:03:18,347 --> 00:03:19,511
Banana phone.
84
00:03:19,917 --> 00:03:21,418
Well, I have an actual phone.
85
00:03:21,443 --> 00:03:22,443
Okay.
86
00:03:22,898 --> 00:03:24,042
All right.
87
00:03:24,067 --> 00:03:25,995
Uh, I left something
down in the basement.
88
00:03:26,020 --> 00:03:27,886
I'm gonna go get it. I'll be right back.
89
00:03:30,184 --> 00:03:31,777
Something in the basement.
Oh, I found it.
90
00:03:33,289 --> 00:03:35,300
I know it's not actual water,
91
00:03:35,325 --> 00:03:37,111
I've seen the Harlem Globetrotters.
92
00:03:37,604 --> 00:03:39,027
You can go now.
93
00:03:40,599 --> 00:03:42,120
Your smart-ass attitude
is not going to get you
94
00:03:42,145 --> 00:03:43,293
into a good college.
95
00:03:44,122 --> 00:03:45,504
- Yeah, hello?
- Hey, Chip.
96
00:03:45,529 --> 00:03:46,558
What's that?
97
00:03:47,980 --> 00:03:48,980
Yeah.
98
00:03:49,005 --> 00:03:50,245
Hey, Chip. How you doing?
99
00:03:50,785 --> 00:03:52,424
Actually, I'm having a tricky time
100
00:03:52,449 --> 00:03:53,745
with my grief clowning.
101
00:03:54,123 --> 00:03:56,909
- Oh, this kid is tricky.
- Listen, Chip,
102
00:03:56,934 --> 00:03:58,892
I just wanted to check in to make sure
103
00:03:58,917 --> 00:04:00,501
that your mom isn't still upset
104
00:04:00,526 --> 00:04:02,331
about me not being
there for the wedding.
105
00:04:02,546 --> 00:04:04,886
- Well, she-she seems fine.
- Really?
106
00:04:04,911 --> 00:04:06,976
Now, you would tell me,
Chip, if she wasn't?
107
00:04:07,001 --> 00:04:09,423
I mean, she's not just
putting on a brave face?
108
00:04:09,448 --> 00:04:11,276
Yeah, I'd tell you. I'm not a good liar.
109
00:04:11,301 --> 00:04:13,196
- Actually, that's a lie.
- Well, you know
110
00:04:13,221 --> 00:04:15,344
- I would be there if I could.
- Yeah, I know that.
111
00:04:15,369 --> 00:04:17,312
Amanda! Why are you still here?
112
00:04:17,337 --> 00:04:19,344
You should be on your way to Boulder!
113
00:04:21,270 --> 00:04:22,270
Chip, I gotta go.
114
00:04:22,295 --> 00:04:23,430
Yeah, I gotta go, too. I gotta get back
115
00:04:23,455 --> 00:04:25,327
- to my clowning emergency.
- Yeah, well,
116
00:04:25,352 --> 00:04:27,227
good luck with your clowning emergency.
117
00:04:27,252 --> 00:04:28,555
Okay, bye.
118
00:04:31,243 --> 00:04:32,391
Thank you.
119
00:04:35,579 --> 00:04:36,868
Oh, God.
120
00:04:36,893 --> 00:04:38,493
Well, it's really the same thing.
121
00:04:38,518 --> 00:04:40,562
It's just gonna be a housewarming now.
122
00:04:40,587 --> 00:04:42,782
Yeah, o-okay, no problem.
123
00:04:43,548 --> 00:04:44,860
D-Do you need to talk about this?
124
00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:47,180
- It-it-it seems like a lot.
- No.
125
00:04:47,205 --> 00:04:50,233
But please come to the
housewarming and have some
126
00:04:50,258 --> 00:04:52,335
delicious housewarming cake.
127
00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:55,204
Oh, Christine, you must be crushed.
128
00:04:55,229 --> 00:04:58,016
For what? Ken just had
a carpet emergency.
129
00:04:58,041 --> 00:05:01,165
Well, my ex-husband had
a carpet emergency, too.
130
00:05:01,432 --> 00:05:03,266
She was 26 years old.
131
00:05:03,291 --> 00:05:05,710
No, Carol. What-what I don't
think you understand is,
132
00:05:05,735 --> 00:05:07,883
I don't need the jazz trio.
133
00:05:07,908 --> 00:05:10,860
And it's gonna be $67.50
for the cramp medicine,
134
00:05:10,885 --> 00:05:13,749
cigarettes, adult diapers,
nicotine gum, please.
135
00:05:13,774 --> 00:05:15,391
You still smoking and
chewing the nicotine gum
136
00:05:15,416 --> 00:05:16,540
at the same time, Fred?
137
00:05:16,565 --> 00:05:18,616
What's going on with you?
Thanks so much.
138
00:05:18,641 --> 00:05:19,929
Have a good one, buddy.
139
00:05:21,080 --> 00:05:22,969
Not during business hours, Mama.
140
00:05:23,254 --> 00:05:24,254
Stanley.
141
00:05:24,471 --> 00:05:27,173
I've been giving you free
Internet for-for way too long.
142
00:05:27,198 --> 00:05:30,101
I'd say to the tune of
about 500 smackeroos. Okay?
143
00:05:30,126 --> 00:05:31,615
I need to get a wedding gift for my mom.
144
00:05:31,640 --> 00:05:32,696
What do you got for me?
145
00:05:32,883 --> 00:05:36,024
Well, I got a golf cart that
used to belong to Gary Busey.
146
00:05:36,049 --> 00:05:37,268
I got it at auction.
147
00:05:37,293 --> 00:05:39,462
Gary Busey? Hmm.
148
00:05:40,076 --> 00:05:42,555
My mom did love that Buddy
Hollymovie he was in.
149
00:05:42,580 --> 00:05:43,790
She loves golf carts.
150
00:05:43,815 --> 00:05:45,516
It's a very practical gift.
151
00:05:45,541 --> 00:05:47,409
I'll throw in a fox-fur lap blanket.
152
00:05:47,434 --> 00:05:48,829
Done deal, I'll take 'em both.
153
00:05:48,993 --> 00:05:51,337
Wonderful, thanks so much. Next!
154
00:05:51,568 --> 00:05:52,821
How you doing, Cotton?
155
00:05:53,337 --> 00:05:55,946
Okay, where were we?
Oh, yeah, I remember.
156
00:05:57,416 --> 00:05:59,157
- Hey!
- Oh, let me get that off of you.
157
00:05:59,697 --> 00:06:02,171
- What's your problem?
- Let me help you get that off...
158
00:06:02,196 --> 00:06:03,579
Hey, stop!
159
00:06:03,907 --> 00:06:05,514
- Isn't this funny?
- You're not funny!
160
00:06:05,539 --> 00:06:07,415
- Well, I just... it's just...
- I'm gonna call the nurse.
161
00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:08,835
Why? Don't call...
Please don't call the nurse.
162
00:06:08,860 --> 00:06:10,524
- Nurse, please come in.
- Nur... okay,
163
00:06:10,549 --> 00:06:11,549
- don't call the... no nurses.
- Nurses' station.
164
00:06:11,574 --> 00:06:14,237
- What do you need?
- There's a scary hobo in my room.
165
00:06:14,262 --> 00:06:16,009
I'm not a ho... I'm a clown.
166
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,624
I-I'm a clown. This is a costume.
167
00:06:18,649 --> 00:06:20,337
- Okay...
- Forget it.
168
00:06:21,931 --> 00:06:24,002
Oh, my God. Are you okay?
169
00:06:29,447 --> 00:06:30,744
Yeah, I'll let you talk to her.
170
00:06:31,888 --> 00:06:32,939
Ew!
171
00:06:46,186 --> 00:06:47,736
How'd it go in the kids ward?
172
00:06:50,658 --> 00:06:52,384
I've had better shows.
173
00:06:53,470 --> 00:06:54,799
Yeah, it's tricky now, right?
174
00:06:54,957 --> 00:06:56,698
Uh, what do you mean?
175
00:06:57,155 --> 00:06:58,635
The kids these days.
176
00:06:58,882 --> 00:07:00,493
All they've seen in, like, movies,
177
00:07:00,518 --> 00:07:03,783
video games is all scary clowns,
killer clowns. You know?
178
00:07:03,808 --> 00:07:07,594
Like the Joker and the, like, It.
179
00:07:07,619 --> 00:07:10,517
I mean, even in real life,
like the... what's his name,
180
00:07:10,542 --> 00:07:13,252
John Wayne. Um, the murderer.
181
00:07:13,277 --> 00:07:14,277
He's a murderer,
182
00:07:14,302 --> 00:07:15,789
- and he wore clown makeup.
- What?
183
00:07:15,814 --> 00:07:17,384
John Wayne was a clown?
184
00:07:17,409 --> 00:07:18,830
John Wayne Gacy.
185
00:07:19,090 --> 00:07:21,181
John Wayne Gacy.
I think that's the airport.
186
00:07:21,206 --> 00:07:23,252
Is it? Doesn't matter.
187
00:07:23,277 --> 00:07:26,031
The fact is, you're in a world
where no child
188
00:07:26,056 --> 00:07:30,736
has seen Bozo, and every child
has seen murdering clowns.
189
00:07:30,761 --> 00:07:33,938
But I... I'm an old-fashioned clown.
190
00:07:33,963 --> 00:07:36,431
- I'm a traditionalist.
- Yeah, you are.
191
00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:40,009
And that's why, like,
I wear this for the other wards.
192
00:07:40,034 --> 00:07:42,564
Like, the old people who are,
frankly, dying.
193
00:07:42,589 --> 00:07:44,611
But I got a new look for the kiddos.
194
00:07:45,485 --> 00:07:47,310
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, what are you doing?
195
00:07:47,335 --> 00:07:48,924
- Boom.
- Oh, dear.
196
00:07:52,666 --> 00:07:54,703
- What are you, Pantyhose Man?
- No.
197
00:07:54,728 --> 00:07:57,188
- Turtleneck Man?
- I call it Spiderweb Man.
198
00:07:57,213 --> 00:07:59,071
- Spiderweb Man?
- It's a superhero.
199
00:07:59,682 --> 00:08:01,760
They're based on the best of us.
200
00:08:01,785 --> 00:08:05,093
Right? Clowns are based
on a homeless person.
201
00:08:05,338 --> 00:08:06,697
What are you talking about?
202
00:08:06,722 --> 00:08:08,955
Oh. I made this.
203
00:08:11,055 --> 00:08:12,055
Look.
204
00:08:12,705 --> 00:08:14,220
You can... you can borrow that.
205
00:08:14,377 --> 00:08:16,988
- Who is that, Mitt Romney?
- No, it's Superhero Man.
206
00:08:17,101 --> 00:08:19,603
You put that on,
kids are gonna go crazy.
207
00:08:20,752 --> 00:08:22,517
You'll get laughs.
208
00:08:23,527 --> 00:08:24,838
Remember those?
209
00:08:29,635 --> 00:08:32,892
Martha, thanks for
coming in early to help.
210
00:08:32,975 --> 00:08:34,478
Really appreciate it.
211
00:08:34,503 --> 00:08:37,328
Sure, Mrs. Baskets.
I want to be here for you
212
00:08:37,353 --> 00:08:38,625
in your time of need.
213
00:08:38,650 --> 00:08:42,516
- Is Chip coming?
- Oh, I'm sure he is.
214
00:08:42,541 --> 00:08:45,244
But, you know,
he is clowning at the hospital.
215
00:08:45,424 --> 00:08:47,701
Oh, I didn't realize
he was clowning again.
216
00:08:47,726 --> 00:08:48,759
That's great.
217
00:08:48,784 --> 00:08:51,482
Oh, he didn't tell you?
That surprises me.
218
00:08:51,955 --> 00:08:54,414
Well, he is so busy,
it really doesn't surpri...
219
00:08:54,439 --> 00:08:56,299
Oh, God, this won't work.
220
00:08:56,502 --> 00:08:59,047
Martha, will you go
get the Monopoly game
221
00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:00,299
in the game room?
222
00:09:00,324 --> 00:09:02,119
Sure. You have a game room?
223
00:09:02,144 --> 00:09:05,008
I do. It's right next to
the gift-wrapping room.
224
00:09:05,572 --> 00:09:07,172
- Okay.
- Christine!
225
00:09:07,197 --> 00:09:10,047
Oh, Jim!
226
00:09:10,072 --> 00:09:12,844
It's so good to see you.
227
00:09:12,869 --> 00:09:15,047
So, where-where's that schmuck
who canceled on you, huh?
228
00:09:15,072 --> 00:09:17,924
- I'll kill him.
- Oh, it's not like that, honey.
229
00:09:18,330 --> 00:09:20,820
He's very busy.
He's got a lot of carpet returns.
230
00:09:20,853 --> 00:09:22,430
He's the Carpet King...
He's got to take care
231
00:09:22,455 --> 00:09:23,484
- of business.
- Yeah, well, I'll tell you,
232
00:09:23,509 --> 00:09:25,945
I would never cancel
my own wedding, I'll tell you that.
233
00:09:25,970 --> 00:09:27,563
Will you stop it? You're a businessman.
234
00:09:27,588 --> 00:09:29,594
Of all people,
you should know about this.
235
00:09:29,619 --> 00:09:30,984
This isn't business.
236
00:09:31,009 --> 00:09:32,220
This is a family wedding.
237
00:09:32,245 --> 00:09:35,168
- Mom!
- Ah, my twins!
238
00:09:35,193 --> 00:09:36,368
Hey!
239
00:09:36,393 --> 00:09:38,102
- Mmm...!
- Oh!
240
00:09:38,127 --> 00:09:40,651
What is that cologne?
Is that your own brand?
241
00:09:40,676 --> 00:09:41,687
Yeah.
242
00:09:41,712 --> 00:09:44,479
Oh, I always wanted my
own brand of something.
243
00:09:44,504 --> 00:09:46,680
- That's so great.
- We're glad you like it.
244
00:09:46,858 --> 00:09:49,041
But, Mom, um, how you feeling?
245
00:09:49,066 --> 00:09:51,932
If someone canceled my wedding,
I would be crying.
246
00:09:51,957 --> 00:09:54,090
It's not like that. Everything's okay.
247
00:09:54,115 --> 00:09:56,188
And I still want you to deejay.
248
00:09:56,213 --> 00:09:59,464
This is gonna be
a fun housewarming, everyone.
249
00:09:59,489 --> 00:10:01,362
We don't want to raise the vibe in here
250
00:10:01,387 --> 00:10:03,885
if it's just a way for you
to escape your feelings.
251
00:10:03,910 --> 00:10:06,395
- I'm fine.
- Christine, listen to him.
252
00:10:06,420 --> 00:10:07,590
Don't be a martyr.
253
00:10:07,615 --> 00:10:09,061
This is my second marriage.
254
00:10:09,086 --> 00:10:10,305
I'm not a martyr.
255
00:10:10,330 --> 00:10:11,854
Everybody relax.
256
00:10:11,879 --> 00:10:13,543
Let's have a good time.
257
00:10:13,568 --> 00:10:16,025
All right? I want big smiles.
258
00:10:16,050 --> 00:10:17,840
- All right.
- That's better.
259
00:10:17,865 --> 00:10:19,199
All right.
260
00:10:19,224 --> 00:10:20,996
So, what's up, Unc, how you been?
261
00:10:21,973 --> 00:10:23,348
How do you tell who's who?
262
00:10:25,942 --> 00:10:27,670
Look out...!
263
00:10:28,148 --> 00:10:29,440
Whoa!
264
00:10:29,465 --> 00:10:30,981
Hi.
265
00:10:31,801 --> 00:10:33,121
Oh, my God!
266
00:10:33,146 --> 00:10:35,065
Ah! Hi. How are you?
267
00:10:35,090 --> 00:10:36,879
Hi. I'm good.
268
00:10:36,904 --> 00:10:38,059
I'll do something else, okay?
269
00:10:38,084 --> 00:10:39,324
- Uh...
- Okay.
270
00:10:41,098 --> 00:10:42,737
You like that? See my big muscles?
271
00:10:42,762 --> 00:10:43,762
Here you go.
272
00:10:45,435 --> 00:10:46,882
Can you do more?
273
00:10:46,907 --> 00:10:48,386
Uh...
274
00:10:50,192 --> 00:10:52,237
You know what? I can't... I can't, uh...
275
00:10:52,262 --> 00:10:56,369
- You again?
- Yes, Tyler, it is me again, yes.
276
00:10:56,394 --> 00:10:58,317
I just, uh,
was trying to entertain you...
277
00:10:58,342 --> 00:11:00,153
Put the mask back on and do it again.
278
00:11:00,178 --> 00:11:02,707
Uh, you know, this-this character's
not talking to me.
279
00:11:02,732 --> 00:11:04,114
I-I don't know what to do with him...
280
00:11:04,139 --> 00:11:05,457
Put it on!
281
00:11:06,796 --> 00:11:08,395
Look, Tyler...
282
00:11:08,829 --> 00:11:10,418
I'm just trying to find some...
283
00:11:10,443 --> 00:11:13,387
some good through my art, some meaning.
284
00:11:13,762 --> 00:11:15,760
You know? And as a clown,
I can find that meaning.
285
00:11:15,785 --> 00:11:17,254
And dressed like this...
286
00:11:17,871 --> 00:11:21,878
I-I just... I can't even believe
I'm having an existential crisis
287
00:11:21,903 --> 00:11:23,382
in front of a six-year-old.
288
00:11:23,796 --> 00:11:24,988
I'm 12.
289
00:11:25,547 --> 00:11:26,547
Oh.
290
00:11:26,706 --> 00:11:28,378
Well, no wonder you don't like clowns.
291
00:11:28,714 --> 00:11:31,230
My-my-my point being is that...
292
00:11:31,738 --> 00:11:33,111
you shouldn't judge a book by its cover.
293
00:11:33,136 --> 00:11:34,800
Just 'cause a-a guy's dressed as a clown
294
00:11:34,825 --> 00:11:36,738
doesn't mean he doesn't
have something to offer.
295
00:11:37,449 --> 00:11:38,894
And just 'cause someone is a superhero,
296
00:11:38,919 --> 00:11:40,496
it doesn't mean that they're super.
297
00:11:41,613 --> 00:11:43,137
Okay?
298
00:11:43,269 --> 00:11:44,777
That's all I want to say.
299
00:11:45,464 --> 00:11:47,542
And thanks a lot for ruining my month.
300
00:11:47,567 --> 00:11:49,730
Wha... I'm the one in the hospital.
301
00:11:54,606 --> 00:11:56,011
That's not music.
302
00:11:57,496 --> 00:12:00,658
Well, but sometimes giving
a sermon's kind of like
303
00:12:00,683 --> 00:12:02,025
- doing a HALO jump...
- Christine.
304
00:12:02,050 --> 00:12:03,529
- What?
- I'm worried about you.
305
00:12:03,554 --> 00:12:05,830
Oh, don't worry about me. I'm fine.
306
00:12:05,855 --> 00:12:09,025
I wouldn't be having a
party if I wasn't fine.
307
00:12:09,050 --> 00:12:10,922
- Eh...
- This is a rental, people.
308
00:12:10,947 --> 00:12:12,644
Let's use our coasters.
309
00:12:12,819 --> 00:12:16,330
I'm worried about this... flaky Ken guy.
310
00:12:16,355 --> 00:12:18,197
He's not flaky.
311
00:12:18,222 --> 00:12:20,510
He's having a carpet emergency.
312
00:12:20,535 --> 00:12:22,049
Now, go mingle with people.
313
00:12:22,074 --> 00:12:23,792
- Okay, okay, okay.
- Cheer 'em up.
314
00:12:24,066 --> 00:12:26,824
- Nothing like a woman scorned.
- Oh, God.
315
00:12:29,644 --> 00:12:32,150
- Chip!
- Hey, Mom. Sorry I'm late.
316
00:12:32,175 --> 00:12:34,228
No worries. Just grab a drink,
317
00:12:34,253 --> 00:12:36,496
maybe take someone on
a tour of the house.
318
00:12:36,706 --> 00:12:37,838
Okay.
319
00:12:38,386 --> 00:12:40,596
Hey, I heard you're giving house tours.
320
00:12:40,621 --> 00:12:41,730
Yeah, I am.
321
00:12:42,152 --> 00:12:44,181
Do you always bring
board games to weddings?
322
00:12:44,206 --> 00:12:45,855
It's a housewarming.
323
00:12:46,327 --> 00:12:47,327
Kitchen.
324
00:12:47,352 --> 00:12:50,494
Uh... kitchen island,
where you put stuff.
325
00:12:50,519 --> 00:12:51,542
You can put that there if you want.
326
00:12:51,567 --> 00:12:54,385
- Oh, thanks.
- Um... here's the fridge.
327
00:12:54,478 --> 00:12:57,099
Oh, wow, is that one
of those smart refrigerators
328
00:12:57,124 --> 00:12:59,039
you can hook up to your phone?
329
00:12:59,915 --> 00:13:01,737
No, I think it's a dumb one.
I don't know.
330
00:13:01,762 --> 00:13:03,009
Uh, microwave.
331
00:13:03,034 --> 00:13:05,437
Hey, I heard you're clowning again.
That's great.
332
00:13:05,462 --> 00:13:06,735
No, I'm not...
333
00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:08,633
Ooh. You all right?
334
00:13:08,658 --> 00:13:10,009
I'm fine. I'm not clowning again.
335
00:13:10,034 --> 00:13:11,058
Where'd you hear that?
336
00:13:11,083 --> 00:13:13,431
Well, I just heard it
through the grapevine.
337
00:13:13,456 --> 00:13:14,556
The grapevine? Well...
338
00:13:14,581 --> 00:13:16,274
Sometimes grapevines are...
339
00:13:16,642 --> 00:13:18,449
dead, Martha, and untruthful.
340
00:13:18,603 --> 00:13:20,669
I just, you know, clowning is...
341
00:13:20,994 --> 00:13:22,509
It's out of fashion.
342
00:13:22,939 --> 00:13:25,064
- Spices. Mom's got a lot of spice.
- Well...
343
00:13:25,089 --> 00:13:27,057
I'm sorry, Chip. That's a bummer.
344
00:13:27,082 --> 00:13:30,165
- I know how much you love it.
- Cinnamon. Thyme.
345
00:13:30,190 --> 00:13:31,540
What's your favorite spice?
346
00:13:31,768 --> 00:13:33,890
Um, dill weed.
347
00:13:33,915 --> 00:13:35,945
Really? I thought it'd be
more like, uh...
348
00:13:35,970 --> 00:13:37,077
like a bay leaf.
349
00:13:37,512 --> 00:13:38,687
Why?
350
00:13:38,712 --> 00:13:39,806
Bad taste.
351
00:13:39,831 --> 00:13:41,615
- Um, sink.
- Well... well, what are you
352
00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:43,648
- gonna do now?
- Uh, this sink has,
353
00:13:43,673 --> 00:13:46,562
um... got this cool hose.
354
00:13:46,587 --> 00:13:49,523
It's, you know,
it's got everything you need.
355
00:13:49,548 --> 00:13:51,758
- Are you still talking to Tammy?
- Plus the kitchen sink.
356
00:13:51,783 --> 00:13:54,368
Do you think maybe
some life coaching would help?
357
00:13:54,393 --> 00:13:55,570
I mean, I'm...
358
00:13:55,595 --> 00:13:57,939
listening to Tammy's tapes
here and there, but I...
359
00:13:57,964 --> 00:13:59,611
I'm fine, Martha, I'm fine.
360
00:13:59,636 --> 00:14:02,961
Well, you'll figure it out.
I found a new life coach.
361
00:14:02,986 --> 00:14:05,187
They have an in-house one at Costco,
362
00:14:05,212 --> 00:14:08,181
and he helped me plan
out my next five years.
363
00:14:08,955 --> 00:14:10,218
Well, good.
364
00:14:10,822 --> 00:14:12,343
Good, you got your life all in order.
365
00:14:12,368 --> 00:14:13,390
I'll show you upstairs.
366
00:14:13,415 --> 00:14:14,941
- Um, there's a...
- Okay.
367
00:14:14,966 --> 00:14:18,006
Hey, Chip, um, you know, if you want
368
00:14:18,031 --> 00:14:20,783
to talk about the clowning stuff,
I'm always here.
369
00:14:22,181 --> 00:14:23,868
Well, you're not a life coach, Martha.
370
00:14:25,587 --> 00:14:27,040
I'm gonna go get a snack.
371
00:14:28,158 --> 00:14:29,861
Hey! Chip.
372
00:14:29,886 --> 00:14:32,629
I hear you're the new CEO for the rodeo.
373
00:14:33,847 --> 00:14:35,861
Yeah, Uncle Jim, I am. I'm the CEO.
374
00:14:35,886 --> 00:14:37,929
Yeah, just doing CEO duties now.
375
00:14:37,954 --> 00:14:40,096
No more... no more clowning.
376
00:14:40,121 --> 00:14:43,017
Eh, well, I'm glad
you finally came to your senses.
377
00:14:43,729 --> 00:14:45,236
Clowning's for clowns.
378
00:14:45,579 --> 00:14:49,192
Hey, why don't I buy you a
drink, CEO to CEO? Huh?
379
00:14:49,533 --> 00:14:51,064
- Okay.
- Come on.
380
00:14:51,650 --> 00:14:53,095
Aren't the drinks for free?
381
00:15:00,682 --> 00:15:02,954
- Martha!
- Hi, Mrs. Baskets.
382
00:15:02,979 --> 00:15:05,531
How are you?
Can I get you a healthy wrap?
383
00:15:05,556 --> 00:15:08,118
Oh, sure. Thanks, Mrs. Baskets.
384
00:15:08,423 --> 00:15:11,736
Oh, look at Chip over there.
Doesn't he look lonely?
385
00:15:11,761 --> 00:15:13,431
Why don't you bring him a wrap?
386
00:15:13,456 --> 00:15:16,654
Oh, you know what? I'm giving
Chip his space right now.
387
00:15:16,679 --> 00:15:18,200
How are you doing?
388
00:15:18,302 --> 00:15:19,480
I'm terrific.
389
00:15:19,895 --> 00:15:22,129
Having a blast. Isn't this something?
390
00:15:22,154 --> 00:15:24,244
- Definitely.
- Yeah.
391
00:15:24,269 --> 00:15:26,282
I think Ken would've really liked it.
392
00:15:26,307 --> 00:15:28,297
I'm sure he would want to be here.
393
00:15:28,322 --> 00:15:29,954
I mean, look at all this.
394
00:15:29,979 --> 00:15:31,547
- Yeah.
- Christine,
395
00:15:31,572 --> 00:15:34,063
what was the song that you
were gonna play for your first dance?
396
00:15:34,088 --> 00:15:36,219
Oh, uh, what was it?
397
00:15:36,244 --> 00:15:38,635
Oh, you probably don't know it,
but it's called, uh,
398
00:15:38,660 --> 00:15:41,055
"Dedicated to the One I Love"
399
00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:42,822
by The Mamas and the Papas.
400
00:15:42,847 --> 00:15:45,571
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah. Do you know that one?
401
00:15:48,486 --> 00:15:50,471
I don't know... wait, wait, oh...
402
00:15:50,496 --> 00:15:51,797
No, yeah, yeah, yeah.
403
00:15:51,822 --> 00:15:52,864
Okay, okay, okay.
404
00:15:52,889 --> 00:15:54,666
Cut that garbage off, huh?
405
00:15:59,471 --> 00:16:02,675
♪ While I'm far away ♪
406
00:16:02,700 --> 00:16:04,658
- ♪ From you, my baby... ♪
- Oh! I know it.
407
00:16:04,683 --> 00:16:06,463
Yes! That one.
408
00:16:06,488 --> 00:16:11,329
♪ I know it's hard for you, my baby ♪
409
00:16:12,692 --> 00:16:16,407
♪ Because it's hard for me ♪
410
00:16:16,432 --> 00:16:18,135
♪ My baby ♪
411
00:16:18,815 --> 00:16:23,697
♪ And the darkest hour
is just before dawn ♪
412
00:16:27,682 --> 00:16:30,236
- ♪ Love can never be... ♪
- Oh, yeah.
413
00:16:30,261 --> 00:16:33,391
♪ Exactly like we want it to be ♪
414
00:16:33,416 --> 00:16:36,401
♪ I could be satisfied ♪
415
00:16:36,426 --> 00:16:39,190
♪ Knowing you love me ♪
416
00:16:39,215 --> 00:16:41,471
♪ There's one thing
I want you to do... ♪
417
00:16:43,990 --> 00:16:45,066
I can't.
418
00:16:45,091 --> 00:16:47,322
♪ And it's something ♪
419
00:16:47,347 --> 00:16:51,979
♪ That everybody needs ♪
420
00:16:52,004 --> 00:16:56,552
♪ Each night before
you go to bed, my baby... ♪
421
00:16:56,577 --> 00:16:58,278
- Want to dance?
- Oh.
422
00:16:58,546 --> 00:17:00,405
Well, okay.
423
00:17:00,430 --> 00:17:03,301
♪ For me, my baby, whoo... ♪
424
00:17:03,638 --> 00:17:04,896
Ow, that's my foot, Mom.
425
00:17:04,921 --> 00:17:06,108
- Oh.
- It's okay.
426
00:17:06,133 --> 00:17:08,296
- I'm sorry, honey.
- You okay?
427
00:17:09,064 --> 00:17:10,960
I guess. Yeah.
428
00:17:11,671 --> 00:17:13,224
Yeah, I'm okay.
429
00:17:16,186 --> 00:17:18,444
Hey, Mom! I came as soon
as my good clothes
430
00:17:18,469 --> 00:17:19,712
were dried off by the crick.
431
00:17:19,737 --> 00:17:21,844
Dale, you made it!
432
00:17:21,869 --> 00:17:23,632
I'm so glad!
433
00:17:23,657 --> 00:17:24,835
Hey, I didn't miss the vows, did I?
434
00:17:24,860 --> 00:17:27,819
Because I got you and
Ken the best wedding gift
435
00:17:27,844 --> 00:17:29,882
on the most important day of your life.
436
00:17:29,907 --> 00:17:32,188
Oh, that's so nice, honey, but, listen,
437
00:17:32,213 --> 00:17:34,550
you didn't get my message, obviously.
438
00:17:34,575 --> 00:17:36,805
No. What message?
439
00:17:36,830 --> 00:17:38,071
Hey, Martha. Hey, everybody.
440
00:17:38,096 --> 00:17:39,602
I said that Ken had
441
00:17:39,627 --> 00:17:43,358
a carpet emergency and that
we changed the wedding
442
00:17:43,383 --> 00:17:45,829
into a housewarming party.
443
00:17:46,051 --> 00:17:49,753
You turned it into
a housewarming... party?
444
00:17:49,778 --> 00:17:51,106
Is this a prank, Mom?
445
00:17:51,131 --> 00:17:53,075
- No.
- What is this?
446
00:17:53,372 --> 00:17:56,715
Nobody turns a wedding into
a housewarming party, Mom.
447
00:17:56,740 --> 00:17:57,747
That's evil.
448
00:17:57,772 --> 00:18:01,215
- Hey, easy there, pal.
- "Easy, pal" to you, Uncle Jim.
449
00:18:01,638 --> 00:18:03,190
What kind of man cancels his wedding
450
00:18:03,215 --> 00:18:05,020
on the day of the wedding?
451
00:18:05,045 --> 00:18:06,886
Huh? Who is this Ken guy?
452
00:18:06,911 --> 00:18:08,565
He sounds like a shyster.
453
00:18:08,609 --> 00:18:10,524
He sounds like a scoundrel.
454
00:18:10,567 --> 00:18:11,840
And just because I'm a gentleman,
455
00:18:11,865 --> 00:18:14,080
I'm not gonna say I told you so, but...
456
00:18:14,592 --> 00:18:16,080
Well, you just did tell me so.
457
00:18:16,105 --> 00:18:18,963
I told you so with my face,
but not verbally, okay?
458
00:18:18,988 --> 00:18:20,478
No, I heard it verbally, honey.
459
00:18:20,503 --> 00:18:22,798
Well, if there's no wedding,
there's no wedding gift.
460
00:18:22,823 --> 00:18:25,720
I guess I'll have to get this
golf cart back to Gary Busey.
461
00:18:25,745 --> 00:18:27,342
Yes. The Gary Busey.
462
00:18:27,367 --> 00:18:28,619
This was his.
463
00:18:35,277 --> 00:18:37,337
Dale, are you okay?
464
00:18:37,362 --> 00:18:39,978
- Was that really Gary Busey's?
- Mother!
465
00:18:45,261 --> 00:18:47,102
It's still light out.
466
00:18:47,127 --> 00:18:48,861
You really have to go?
467
00:18:48,886 --> 00:18:51,150
- Oh, honey, thanks.
- Are you gonna be okay?
468
00:18:51,175 --> 00:18:53,308
- I hope so.
- Oh.
469
00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:55,117
- Oh, thanks.
- I love you, sweetie.
470
00:18:55,142 --> 00:18:56,250
- Ah...
- Oh, thank...
471
00:18:56,275 --> 00:18:58,093
Oh, thank you for the beautiful music.
472
00:18:58,118 --> 00:18:59,298
- No-no problem.
- It was so good.
473
00:18:59,323 --> 00:19:00,830
I'd pay good money to
see that show in Vegas.
474
00:19:00,855 --> 00:19:02,969
- Golf cart in a pool?
- Oh...
475
00:19:02,994 --> 00:19:04,500
- Get some rest!
- We got to go, Mom.
476
00:19:04,525 --> 00:19:05,775
- Aw, you're leaving?
- Congrats on the house.
477
00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:07,208
- Yeah, we love you, Mom.
- Oh...
478
00:19:07,233 --> 00:19:08,451
Mmm.
479
00:19:08,642 --> 00:19:10,805
Yeah, you didn't have any of the, uh...
480
00:19:10,830 --> 00:19:12,064
- the cake.
- Nah.
481
00:19:12,089 --> 00:19:14,048
- There's a lot of housewarming cake.
- Hey, Mom.
482
00:19:14,073 --> 00:19:15,666
- Nah, we good, Mom.
- Mom?
483
00:19:15,691 --> 00:19:16,751
What?
484
00:19:16,775 --> 00:19:19,900
Is it okay if I put plastic
plates in the dishwasher?
485
00:19:20,376 --> 00:19:21,697
Oh.
486
00:19:22,316 --> 00:19:24,101
Put everything in there.
487
00:19:38,789 --> 00:19:39,789
Hello?
488
00:19:39,814 --> 00:19:41,092
Anybody home?
489
00:19:41,759 --> 00:19:44,625
Ken? What are you doing here?
490
00:19:44,650 --> 00:19:48,371
Well, I thought about it,
and I just couldn't miss our big day.
491
00:19:48,892 --> 00:19:50,510
I got to fly right back out tomorrow,
492
00:19:50,535 --> 00:19:52,408
but I wanted to be here tonight.
493
00:19:52,433 --> 00:19:55,043
- Well, honey, it's over.
- Christine.
494
00:19:55,068 --> 00:19:56,824
I told you I could fly back,
495
00:19:57,188 --> 00:19:58,488
but you said no.
496
00:19:58,815 --> 00:20:00,582
You said it was no big deal.
497
00:20:00,607 --> 00:20:02,549
Well, it wasn't a big deal,
and then people started
498
00:20:02,574 --> 00:20:04,152
coming up to me and saying,
499
00:20:04,177 --> 00:20:07,338
"Are you okay, Christine?
Why isn't Ken here?
500
00:20:07,370 --> 00:20:09,871
Where's Ken? I thought
Ken was gonna be here,"
501
00:20:09,896 --> 00:20:13,404
so I felt so alone.
502
00:20:13,429 --> 00:20:16,965
Well, they were probably just
being concerned about you.
503
00:20:17,355 --> 00:20:19,923
And I realize now that
I should have been, too.
504
00:20:20,504 --> 00:20:22,519
Oh, God.
505
00:20:23,260 --> 00:20:27,467
My first marriage was a mess, and now
506
00:20:28,317 --> 00:20:32,553
my second marriage,
I'm not even to the "I do's..."
507
00:20:33,756 --> 00:20:35,389
and it's a mess.
508
00:20:38,976 --> 00:20:40,741
Christine, I'm sorry.
509
00:20:42,521 --> 00:20:44,740
I'm sorry I missed today.
510
00:20:45,466 --> 00:20:49,647
I made a big mistake
that I wish I hadn't made.
511
00:20:51,319 --> 00:20:54,975
I guess I'm just not good at
juggling my business in Denver
512
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:58,069
and... having my new life here.
513
00:21:00,147 --> 00:21:01,147
Well...
514
00:21:02,109 --> 00:21:03,709
you missed quite a show.
515
00:21:04,663 --> 00:21:08,202
Dale drove a golf cart
straight into the pool.
516
00:21:08,571 --> 00:21:11,811
My brother said
he was gonna beat you up,
517
00:21:12,227 --> 00:21:13,975
and he was crazy.
518
00:21:14,631 --> 00:21:17,600
And all my friends,
I found out they can't carry a tune.
519
00:21:19,522 --> 00:21:21,819
Why doesn't any of that surprise me?
520
00:21:23,319 --> 00:21:26,624
So, I guess if that's all okay,
I guess I could forgive you.
521
00:21:30,350 --> 00:21:32,334
Christine, let's get married tonight.
522
00:21:32,530 --> 00:21:34,700
Tonight? Nobody's here.
523
00:21:34,725 --> 00:21:36,973
Eh. Who cares?
524
00:21:37,124 --> 00:21:38,335
Let's do it.
525
00:21:39,055 --> 00:21:40,535
Just the two of us.
526
00:22:05,867 --> 00:22:07,786
I now pronounce thee
527
00:22:07,811 --> 00:22:09,303
man and wife.
528
00:22:32,444 --> 00:22:35,844
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com
528
00:22:36,305 --> 00:22:42,214
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