Original subtitles

What happened? How am I outside of my body?

Am I dead?

I don't know, Jay.

I-I wouldn't say dead.

But it is an interesting question, philosophically.

You're Isaac. And you're Alberta.

I recognize you from Todd's back tattoo.

Oh, Creepy Todd?

That's what you're leading with?

Oh, my God.

You must be Hetty.

Although we've kind of already met 'cause you possessed me.

It is very nice to properly meet you.

I customarily ask any new ghost

if they're holding cocaine,

but I know your only vice is Sonic.

It's so weird not being able to see the other ghosts.

Are they talking during these long silences?

Man, Jay lives a lonely existence.

J-Dog. T-Money.

While I have you, can I give you my elevator pitch

on your restaurant?

Sam keeps not passing it along.

Upscale breastaurant.

Like Hooters but even classier.

Hey, guys, merry Christmas... Oh, God!

Should have knocked, sorry!

Also, really?

It is the middle of the afternoon,

and Mom and Dad are downstairs.

Oh, hey, it's Jay's sister.

What? What's happening?

Are you two doing drugs? Are there any left?

No. Okay, shh.

Listen. This is a lot to explain.

Jay and I... we both got possessed by ghosts.

I got mine out,

but because Pete has a special power where

he can leave the property, we had to do an exorcism,

but instead of Pete's soul being ejected from Jay's body,

Jay's soul got ejected from Jay's body.

And here we are.

That was actually well-summarized.

Sorry to be a bother, but could someone please untie me?

It's been 40 years, so I'm not sure,

but I think I need to pee.

Wait, so that's Pete?

In the flesh. Get it?

And where's Jay? I'm right here.

She can't hear me. This is so frustrating!

Oh, really? We hadn't noticed.

Jay's right there.

He's next to you. He's kind of like a ghost.

But he's not dead. We don't think.

Hmm, interesting you went for a clove hitch knot

on these bad boys.

Those are usually used to moor a boat.

I just had a brilliant thought.

An exorcism is meant to evict an evil spirit.

Well, perhaps, in the absence

of a truly evil spirit,

it just ejects the less pure soul.

In this case, Jay.

Hmm, interesting.

The ghosts think Pete's soul is so pure

that the exorcism spit out Jay.

Not because he's bad but because

he's not Pete.

Feels like a little bit of a dig.

Here you go. Thank you.

Now, if you'll excuse me,

this pure baby soul's got to use the bathroom.

Nice to meet you, Bela.

This is so weird.

Tell Jay I won't look.

Ow!

Watch my nose, Pete.

Those solid doors.

So, what are we gonna do?

Well, the first thing we're gonna do is

get you back in your body.

I'm talking to Jay. We can use

the possession sconce in the living room

to electrocute the body and get Jay's soul back inside.

And what about getting Pete out of my body?

I don't know, one thing at a time.

Bela, I need you to get your parents out of the house

while we zap Jay back into his body.

On it. Um,

by the way, is Trevor in here, or...?

You have a boyfriend.

Out of the country, bro. Doesn't count.

Oh, man, Jay drinks a lot of water.

What?

Uh... I mean, I drink a lot of water.

Look, Bela wants to go shopping with me and Dad.

Come with us.

Ooh, I don't think that's such a good idea.

I've come all the way up here.

Spend some time with your poor mother.

I never get to see you.

Okay.

I don't know about this.

You sure I should drive?

Bela's car is full of empty water bottles.

We could have taken the Audi

if your wife hadn't wrapped it around a stone column.

It's just that I haven't done this in a while.

I think I push this button right here and...

Holy moly, it worked!

Okay, I'm ready.

Wait, what is Jay doing here?

I'm driving. Ten and two, and...

whee!

See, I told you. There's a new ghost.

And he looks just like that guy

who's always hanging out with Sam.

Whoa!

Small man now small ghost!

Thorfinn? Bring it in, big guy.

Ooh! That wolf urine.

Was used to ward off bears.

You know what doesn't ward off bears?

Patchouli.

That's looking sufficiently dangerous.

Now we just need Pete.

He can't still be in the bathroom.

Although Jay's body is due for its

mid-afternoon evacuation. That's true.

Why do you people know this?

Sasappis! Hello.

How you doing, best friend?

Can someone please tell Thor

that I'm still not talking to him?

Wait, what's Jay doing here?

I swear I just saw him driving off the property.

Seriously?

Peter's absconded with Jay's body.

Pete accidentally possessed me,

and then-then we did an exorcism,

but then I got expelled, and...

it's been a day.

So, Jay,

you're going to cook us Christmas Eve dinner tonight?

Yes, uh, to sample the menu

for you and Mahesh. Who I call Dad.

Jay, do you remember your friend Ravi from middle school

who was trying to become a tennis pro?

Well, he recently gave up on that dream

and went to engineering school.

What is the point of this, Dad?

Just an inspiring tale of someone making a smart choice.

Oh.

It's the old ball and chain.

Hey, honey, it's me, your husband Jay.

Where the hell are you?

I swear to God, if you don't come back right now,

I will never let you smell anything ever again.

You're on speaker, Sam.

Uh, we're with our parents.

Oh. Just a little inside joke.

See you when you're back, sweetie.

Hopefully really soon.

She's so controlling.

I think she's just a little concerned

that I left with the body.

Ha! Jay and I are gonna, um, go look around.

We will meet you out front in a few minutes.

Okay.

Get it together, Pete.

You're supposed to be Jay, remember?

Ah, come on, I thought I was pulling it off okay.

You drove ten miles an hour the whole way here

and then you hugged the greeter outside.

I drove cautiously because I haven't driven in 40 years,

and Nathan was very appreciative.

Ooh, Jay's still following the girl

from the community theater group.

He's gonna get in trouble for that.

Pete, we need to get you back home

and get Jay back in your body.

His body. Whatever.

Wait. My daughter Laura just posted something.

"Our last Christmas in Philly."

Oh, my God. What is it?

They're moving.

She got a job in Australia.

They leave tomorrow.

Okay... I can't travel that far.

I'd... I'd disappear before I ever made it back.

I have to go.

What? No. No, you don't.

Tell Sam and Jay I said sorry.

I mean, I'm Jay. I'm sorry.

I'm really not looking forward to the turnpike.

It's scary.

Did he... just leave us here?

I think so?

I bet this is Samantha's fault.

Okay. This is objectively a bad situation,

but that door thing is cool as hell.

Yes, it's very neat. Yeah, get it out of your system.

I just talked to Bela

upstairs, and apparently Pete ran off.

What? He took our car and Jay's body,

and he's driving toward Philly right now to see his daughter.

How could he do this? That's-that's my body.

Geez, you think you know a guy.

Apparently, Pete's daughter's moving to Australia.

And with the fact that Pete disappears

if he's gone from Woodstone for too long,

he's worried that this is

the last chance he'll ever have to see her.

And Little Pete.

That adorable little bastard.

Technically true... he was born out of wedlock.

Take it up with the bastard's parents.

Look, I feel for Pete, but, again, it's my body.

What if he gets in a car wreck?

What if he stays too long and disappears?

He might not even notice he's disappearing

because he's inside a body.

What would happen to my body then? I don't know.

Maybe it dies. Or maybe it's just a zombie.

That would be a fascinating entry in your ghost notes.

I don't want to be a zombie.

Nobody wants to be a zombie.

But it's just something that may happen.

Jay, I can see where our car is.

He must be driving very slowly

because he's only like 30 miles away.

Wait, you can track the car now?

Now Jay's realizing

all the Sonic runs he's been busted for.

I can hear you now!

Oh, damn it, this is really confusing.

Jay, I'm gonna go get Pete,

and then we are gonna get you back inside your body,

and then you'll make a great dinner,

and it'll be a great Christmas, and your mom will love me,

and I will finally be added to the group thread.

And more importantly, you won't die or become a zombie.

Go save the day, babe.

I'll be back.

I'm taking Bela's car.

Hey, Jay,

your parents are up in their room talking about you.

What? Why are you spying on my folks?

In Trevor's defense,

spying on people is 98% of what we do.

I guess it is kind of a cool opportunity.

The sooner you take the moral low road,

the more you'll get to hear. Either way, we're going.

Okay, I'll meet you up there.

I'm gonna go through the door again, though.

It's just, I wish

he had gone for something like medicine.

That's why we came here.

So they could have opportunities that we didn't.

Mahesh.

He was cooking even as a small child.

It is his passion.

It's not that I don't think he's talented.

I never said this to him because I don't want

to encourage that restaurant nonsense, but...

he's the best cook I've ever seen.

Really?

What is that supposed to mean?

And she made it about her.

Nicely played. I like this woman.

He learned it from you, of course.

I'm just saying, he has a gift.

But even with a gift,

that business... there's no guarantee.

I just don't want to see him struggle.

Hey, guys, do you want to go grab some food in town?

We'll have to Uber because I think Sam stole my car.

That sounds about right.

Well, that must have felt good to hear, Jay.

I know what I need to tell my dad now

to make him understand why I'm opening the restaurant.

I just hope Pete's back with my body soon

so I get the chance.

It was a rather rash move for Peter to run off,

but you have to consider it from his perspective.

This is a once-in-an-afterlife opportunity.

In your body he'll actually be able to talk to his daughter.

And she'll be able to hear him.

Poor Peter has missed the last 40 Christmases with Laura.

And he's never had one with his little illegitimate grandson.

Guess I didn't think about it like that.

I would do anything to spend

another Christmas with my family.

Yes. Mm.

No Pants, I think we got to send a text.

To the iPad.

T-Money to the rescue.

He really says that all the time?

You have no idea. Yeah. Yeah.

Hello, Pete.

Oh, cheese and crackers.

I tracked the car to this rest stop.

Darn it, I had to pee again.

You know, you forget how much time you buy back as a ghost

not having to worry about all these bodily functions.

We're going home, Pete.

But what about Laura and Little Pete?

It's too risky.

What if something happens to Jay's body

or you start to disappear?

Also, it's not my call to make.

Oh, gosh.

I guess you're right.

Hmm. It's from the kitchen iPad.

"I get it now. Pete needs to see his family on Christmas.

I can wait a few extra hours."

Wow.

Your husband is a wonderful man.

A wonderful man with a walnut-sized bladder.

Isn't Laura

gonna think it's weird when we just show up?

You mean because we're her casual acquaintances

who just happen to own the property

on which both of her parents met their demise?

Yeah, that's what I mean.

That's what the gift is for.

Cool.

Well, let me drive

because I want to get there before Tuesday.

Listen, I wanted to talk to you

about the whole Thor thing.

And I wanted to let you know from the outset

that that's what I wanted to talk about.

In case I veer off topic,

you can guide me back.

That sounds like a good system.

Please don't be mad at Thor.

I pressured him into telling me your secret.

Now, if I'd had any idea

that it was going to be such a bummer of a secret,

I would never have done that.

Look, it's not even about the secret.

I mean, sure, it's a little embarrassing.

You are so brave.

It's more about the fact that he told you.

Mm. Thor and I have been

best friends for 500 years.

I can still remember the day we met.

I had just recently died

and hadn't seen another ghost yet.

Yeah? Yeah.

The big guy learned Lenape

from watching us all those years.

Aw, that is so sweet.

I'm happy for you guys,

but him telling you my secret

is kind of like him choosing you over me.

And that's not your fault, but... it hurt.

You know, a threesome would solve a lot of the problems

on the table right now. I'm just saying.

No, thank you. I'm good.

But how? How are you good?

Hey.

Sam. Jay.

Laura.

What are you doing here?

We were just in the area.

We wanted a Christmas cheesesteak,

it's this weird tradition we have.

Anyway, we thought

we'd stop by and give you something.

Okay. It's a little weird,

but would you like to come in for a couple minutes?

You look amazing, sweetie.

Thank you, husband.

He's talking to me.

We won't stay long.

This is wonderful.

I can't believe I'm talking to you.

Mommy, who is it?

It's Sam and Jay from Woodstone.

You met them.

The people who killed Grandma?

It was an accident.

Little Pete.

Hi.

Jay, why don't you give her the gift?

Oh, yeah. Of course.

Uh, here you go, Laura.

A Trenton rest stop snow globe?

I heard you were moving,

and I thought it'd be nice for you to have something

to always remember home.

It's funny,

my dad used to always get me snow globes.

Lucky guess.

Sounds like he was a very sweet man.

The sweetest.

I miss him every day.

Well, I bet if he were here,

he'd tell you how proud of you he is,

and the beautiful family you've created.

You done good.

Thank you.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Is he okay?

Yeah. He, uh, took some cold medicine earlier.

I guess it's kicking in now.

Oof, Zombie Jay.

Little Pete's gonna have nightmares.

And I don't think I'm gonna sleep well either.

Come on, babe. Merry Christmas.

And then, when Jay's body pulled out

of the hug, Pete's soul stayed behind,

still hugging Laura.

Incredible.

Huey Lewis was right.

The power of love.

Mm-mm.

Really don't like this look on me.

Okay, my parents are upstairs in their room.

We're all clear.

Great, let's get you back in there.

How are you going to convey to this beast

that it should touch the light?

That's what this is for.

We stopped for fries at Sonic.

Come get it, Zombie Jay.

Okay, well,

I guess this is goodbye.

Thank you for everything.

The honor was ours, sir.

It was wonderful knowing you.

I hope it is many years until we meet again,

but when that sad day does arrive,

please ensure your pockets

are stuffed to the brim

with high-quality cocaine.

We'll be here, bro.

Jay, hurry, get behind you.

Okay, I'm ready.

Oh, he's going for the Sonic.

Jay!

Are you okay? Jay?

Jay?

Brains!

Oh, no.

Nah, I'm Just kidding. It's me.

I'm back, baby.

Ooh, got us.

Oh, I hate zombies.

Sasappis,

we need to speak. Thor know

that since start dating Flower,

Thor get very wrapped up in relationship,

but Thor sorry if he neglect you.

Did Flower put you up to this?

Yes, but only because Flower know

how important Sass is to Thor.

You still Thor's best friend,

and Thor promise to make time

just for Sass and Thor.

That's nice of you to say, but...

In fact, Thor have idea

of what we can do now.

You still know Lenape?

Thor never forget,

just choose to speak English to you

because Thor more better at that.

Makes sense. Just to be clear,

there is no moose carcass.

Was just doing gesture.

Yeah, I got that.

There is flattened bird in road.

Pretty cool.

I could check it out.

Hoo!

Did not miss that wolf urine.

Is good having you back, virgin.

This one's for Sam.

It's from my mom.

Oh.

A robot vacuum. Thank you.

Just seemed like you needed help keeping up.

She's not wrong.

Okay, that looks like all the gifts.

Actually, Dad, I have one more,

but it's not here.

Come with me.

Oh, hey, um, where's my car?

Uh, it's at a rest stop in New Jersey.

Cool.

This is my restaurant, Dad.

And mine, despite your consistent refusal

to put horse pie on the menu.

Oh, that's disgusting, Isaac.

It's just a more muscly cow.

It looks nice, Jay,

but we know about this.

And you know my thoughts.

But there's something you don't know,

which is why I'm starting this restaurant.

Bring it home, Jay.

I know it's a risky endeavor,

but that's kind of what the whole ethos of the menu

and the restaurant is.

It's celebrating the risks

that make life exciting.

Like you and Mom.

You left India,

you went halfway around the world.

You didn't know anyone,

you didn't have any money.

You just wanted to make a better life for your family.

For us.

This restaurant might not work.

There's no guarantee,

but I owe it to the legacy of the man

after whom it's named

to see if it can succeed.

Welcome to Mahesh.

You named the restaurant after me?

It wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you, Dad.

Merry Christmas.

Thank you, son.

Aw,

Jay looks so happy.

You know, Mom, it was Sam's idea

to have Jay open a restaurant in the barn.

Hmm.

Nice work, Samantha.

Thank you.

I wanted to call it Champa's.

It's just too much.

We need to get Nancy back up in there.

"Sam is so thirsty,

and not just for chai"?

Really, Mom?

On the family thread on Christmas?

"And not just for chai"?

You added me to the Core Four?

I'm one of the six

of the Core Four?

Yes,

but be cool.

She will not be cool.

This is so cool, Mom.

I know.

I used to love those when I was your age.

This is just how I pictured it.

Oh, boy.

I think it might be time to go.

Yep, that's my cue to leave.

Merry Christmas, everyone.

Captioning sponsored by CBS

and TOYOTA.

Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org