Original subtitles

Man, your nosy neighbor is killing us.

I don't know how we're gonna get everything

ready in time for the restaurant opening

if he's out here every day.

If we start even a second before 8:00,

I'm worried that he's gonna report us to the county.

I will!

And he's got bionic hearing, too.

That's fun.

My guys are raring to go, Jay. They've got the fire!

I don't know how much longer I can hold them. Yeah.

They're chomping at the bit.

Hold...

Hold.

Hold!

Now!

Well, I'll be back at 4:00 to make sure

you don't go a minute late.

Wha-- Henry.

Hey, hey, hey, hey! Look...

I know that we haven't seen

eye to eye on everything, but could you just give us

a little bit of breathing room?

That's a big no from me, Jay.

Local ordinances are

the solid foundation upon which this country was built.

Without them, we are no better than animals.

I've never been a fan of Henry Farnsby,

but that is one groovy tune he's singing.

When Thor alive, if have bad neighbor,

you invade their land, put head on spike.

Great being neighbors with you!

But passive-aggressive banter are the way to go.

Well, you picked

a wonderful time to join us.

The fall colors are just exploding right now.

My God, this old tired diatribe.

Here comes the hike talk.

Replete with mention of the drainage ditch,

aka "the magical creek."

If you're interested in hiking, we have a "lovely" creek.

Oh, she switched it up.

Oh, it's nice? Yeah.

It's... Say it.

You got nothing else.

...magical.

There it is. She knows no other words.

Babe, the guests are loving it here.

They're talking about having

their wedding here in the spring.

And rehearsal dinner at your restaurant.

If it's even open by then. Farnsby's killing us.

The bastard's out there watching the clock every morning.

The guy needs a hobby. Mm.

Between the pickleball and group sex,

I'd say the man has hobbies.

He's so annoying.

Samantha, if I may,

the true center of power

always lies with the lady of the house.

You need to go through the wife.

Invite her over, charm her.

Okay, I'm seeing one potential roadblock.

And once you've gotten in with her,

she will tell that idiot husband of hers to lay off.

I guess I could invite Margaret over for a drink.

Wait, what? No, babe.

I don't think we should engage with these people.

They're nuts.

I'm sorry, a drink?

What are you, Irish dockworkers?

You're both civilized women.

Just do cocaine.

I think it's worth a shot, Jay.

Margaret's kind of fun.

She can hold stuff.

Other people can see her.

You son of a bitch.

That's a cheap shot, Samantha, you're better than that.

Uh, Sam, some guy is dropping off a giant box outside.

Oh, I know what that is.

Isaac, your wedding present has finally arrived.

It was on back order.

Oh, that's very kind.

But I don't need some reminder of my broken nuptials.

A dinosaur bed? Oh, goodie!

This is for children.

It literally says "for ages five and up."

Yes, "and up." I'm "and up."

The point is, it can be enjoyed by all ages.

Oh!

There's a button that makes it roar.

Incredible.

So, Margaret, have you been

on Baker Street since they repaved it?

No.

Oh.

This more awkward than first dinner with wife

after I throw her father off cliff.

You threw your wife's father off a cliff?

He become burden to society.

Almost 34 years old.

Well, that makes sense.

Well, they did a great job.

It's so... flat.

Yes.

Double down on the road discussion.

Great instincts.

"Two adults required."

Yeah, right. I'm crushing this.

When do you think he's gonna realize

that he used the wrong screws six steps ago?

Probably when he runs out of the long ones,

which should happen in about... three steps.

I can't wait.

Ah.

So the rumors are true.

Nigel.

Yes, the bed was meant to be

a wedding gift from Jay and Samantha,

but I take it you somehow heard that already.

It is quite striking.

But shouldn't it be set up in a neutral location

where we can take turns with it?

As it is a gift...

for both of us? Surely you jest.

You are not even a lover of dinosaurs.

Hmm, perhaps I've changed my mind.

You of all people should know

that sometimes a person can just change their mind.

It's already set up here.

Asking Jay to disassemble it would be quite cruel.

I'm pretty sure he's gonna have to take this apart anyway.

He skipped a whole step. Nigel.

You're being ridiculous.

I love dinosaurs, I'm taking the bed.

End of discussion.

I suppose I should expect nothing less...

from a Yankee!

Wait a minute, are these screws two different sizes?

There's a step 4B?

"See the addendum online"?

I really like food.

Do you like food? I mean,

food's okay. Man.

Margaret is giving her nothing.

I hate to defend a Farnsby,

but our girl's not bringing much to the table either.

This is collective failure.

Like Danish society. Wait a minute.

Sam, I think I saw this same book

over at the Farnsby house.

Maybe Margaret's read it, too.

I also really like to read.

I recently read this book for instance.

Oh, The Unwatered Chrysanthemum?

What a coincidence! I also just read it.

Boom. Common ground. I have a passion for gardening

and I thought that the author did

an incredible job capturing the-the drama

of the dying flower.

I agree. And what a powerful metaphor.

Yeah.

H-How do you mean?

Well, it wasn't just about a dying flower, right?

The chrysanthemum was meant to represent

a woman in a stagnant marriage,

whose husband, aka the gardener, has been neglecting her

for so long,

that she just withered away.

Whoa. Okay...

that stirred something in Margaret.

It's funny because...

Henry used to be so romantic.

But lately, I feel...

taken for granted. Oh, dear.

This has taken a turn. You know,

it might actually just be about a flower.

What about TV?

Oh, have you seen Ted Lasso?

No, you've opened my eyes.

Thank you for the wine, Samantha.

I, uh, I have to go do some thinking.

Okay, well, maybe you could still talk to Henry

about that construction stuff?

Oh, I'll be talking to him, all right.

Sorry, when I said charm her,

I guess I should have made it clear

I didn't mean "blow up her marriage."

No, that's not...

They're gonna be fine.

Mr. Farnsby.

I'm checking in. Margaret kicked me out.

My world is shattered.

Oh, no. And this...

is why women should never read books.

You seem like a nice couple.

She seems like she really loves you.

I'm a lucky man.

Well, it can all change...

just like that.

This not bode well for these two choosing this as wedding venue.

Thor understand stakes.

I was happy and in love once. Now look at me.

She ripped my heart out.

I have no idea why. He's not gonna be thrilled

when he finds out this is Sam's fault.

If they had just done cocaine,

the book would have been but one of the topics

they briefly alighted on in their mania.

Hi, I have an Amazon Prime package for Woodstone B&B.

You can leave it there.

I couldn't help but notice your ring.

Are you married?

Oh, boy. Here we go. Yeah.

It'll be a year next week. Well, then.

I have one thing to say to you: my condolences.

I don't understand. What happened at wine night?

Did Margaret say something to you about this?

Well, there was sort of a misunderstanding.

Pete brought up a book.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, don't throw me under the bus.

And I simply pointed out how that book,

The Unwatered Chrysanthemum, was actually a metaphor

for a stagnant marriage in turmoil.

Oh, my God.

It is getting bleak out there.

Farnsby's just trying to talk everybody out of marriage.

While sob-singing "Love is a Battlefield."

♪ We are young ♪

No. You're not.

Would have been thrown off cliff many moons ago.

♪ Heartache to heartache, we stand ♪

Hey, Henry. That sounds great, buddy.

Oh, thank you, Jay. You know, the acoustics

are really good upstairs, in-in your room.

I understand.

I don't mean to darken the public spaces

of your already floundering business

with my sad songs, but...

I just don't want to be alone right now.

You won't be alone. Jay will jam with you.

Really?

Yes. I love jamming.

I love it.

How do we feel about Jay and Sam's marriage?

I think they're solid.

If not, you know, that'll be something to watch, too.

Oh, I bet this is

what Steven Spielberg sleeps in.

Are you loving it?

I do like pretending to be the tongue.

And I enjoyed the psychotic break

Jay experienced on his third assembly.

But now that he's made my bed, and I'm lying in it...

I don't know.

You know, when I was nine,

we had a Passover seder at my house.

And even though you are not supposed

to search for the afikomen until after the meal,

I kept taking bathroom breaks

until I found it.

The afikomen is the matzo they hide during the seder.

I have been here way too long.

Anyway, the second the meal was over,

I went straight to where it was hidden,

and I won five dollars.

But then I saw my hot cousin Rachel crying.

And that didn't feel good.

Because the person you were both

attracted to and related to was sad?

I was nine.

It was innocent.

But my point is that when it comes

at the expense of someone that you care about,

sometimes a win feels like a loss.

Maybe you're right.

I've put Nigel through so much.

Giving him this bed is the least I could do.

I'll tell Sam to tell Jay to disassemble it.

And then reassemble it again in the shed.

And I'm gonna go see if hot cousin Rachel's

on Instagram. Ew.

I'm dead!

It's still innocent.

Why are we clapping? Who is this for?

Just seem like nice thing to do.

This was just what I needed, Jay.

I don't know what happened.

I was just sitting there, doing my jumble,

and the next thing I know, Margaret is telling me

she's no longer happy in our marriage

and I need to get out.

Have you tried apologizing?

I don't even know what I did.

Henry, bro, one married guy to another, it doesn't matter.

Just say you're sorry and ask them

if they've done something new with their hair.

He knows we watch and tell Sam this stuff, right?

Oh, I hope you're right

because that woman is the light of my life.

Aw.

Thank you for being there for me, Jay.

Now, if you'll excuse me,

I need to use your restroom.

♪ We are young. ♪

He ain't that young.

I was already in that area, Alberta.

We got a little problem, Jay. The guys installed

three-quarter-inch pipe instead of one-inch,

but we already sealed up the wall.

Honestly, it'll get the job done, but if the county

ever heard about this... Shh!

That doesn't sound like a little problem.

Bionic hearing.

Oh, no, Henry's got the goods.

Henry, I can explain. Jay, quick,

you got a cement mixer and a lake, story writes itself.

Okay, I know it looks bad...

Let me stop you right there, Jay.

Would this have been a piece of intel

that "yesterday me" would've used

to crush your upstart venture? Absolutely.

But now,

we are jam bros.

So you're not gonna report me?

The only thing I'm going to report is us

to Rolling Stone magazine

as this year's best new band,

Farnsby and the Dudes.

Did you say "dudes"? That's right.

Just grab a shaker, Mark.

Knock, knock. Isaac,

what are you doing here?

Oh, nothing. I merely wanted to see

how you're enjoying the dinosaur bed.

Alas, I actually gave the bed

to Baxter and Carol as a wedding gift.

Much appreciated.

Still waiting for Jenkins' gift.

I did not support the marriage, and I still do not.

I'm sorry, you regifted it?

Yes. I thought they deserved it,

seeing as how Baxter and Carol had the guts

to follow through on their nuptials.

Oh, so that's what this is about.

You wanted the bed to spite me, for revenge.

Yes. It's a stupid bed. It's not even accurate.

The tyrannosaurus had 60 teeth,

whereas this freak has but 32.

And look at the nostrils, far too close to the eyes.

I thought this bed was made for children, not by them.

Wait.

Those were two oddly astute observations

about the anatomy of a dinosaur.

I didn't think you knew anything of the subject,

or cared for it.

I didn't,

but I was meant to marry man obsessed with dinosaurs.

I studied them to be able to talk with my husband

about his favorite subject.

It was going to be your wedding present.

Oh, I had no idea.

Never mind. It's all in the past now.

I think I shall excuse myself for a walk.

Nigel.

You know who else's nostrils are too close to their eyes?

Shh, stop it. She's my wife.

He's not around, is he, Samantha?

Henry? Uh, no, he's upstairs.

Good, because I don't want to see his stupid face.

Will you see to it that he gets these belongings?

Because I can't even bear having them in my house.

Pair of fuzzy handcuffs.

Yeah, I could see how that would be sentimental.

Margaret, have you come to take me back?

No, Henry, I've just brought a few of your things.

I have nothing to say to you.

This guy wear more leather than Thor.

Well, I have something to say to you,

my love. I'm sorry.

For what?

For anything I might have done.

Unreal.

You don't even know what you did,

and you did something very hurtful,

and I might've let it slide,

but Samantha opened my eyes the other night.

So this is your fault.

No, I was just making conversation.

Pete brought up the book.

She was drowning. I threw her a lifeline.

Don't blame her. She's just the messenger.

You're the gardener who failed to water me.

Goodbye, Henry.

Ugh, now that is an exit line.

Good for you, girl.

Margaret, no, please.

Are you doing something different

with your hair?

Thor think we past that, Henry.

You. You will pay for this.

Whoa, come on-- jam bros.

No, don't "jam bro" me.

Your wife destroyed my life. You are now a jam foe.

Okay, that's not bad,

and in this kind of emotional state, very impressive.

I was just explaining a book.

Tomorrow morning,

when the permit office opens at 7:00 a.m.,

I will be first in line

to tell them about your narrow pipe infraction!

Your restaurant is about to be shut down!

Say goodbye to that dream.

Oh.

Uh, could I get a 6:30 wake-up call, please?

Thank you very much. Good night.

This is bad. This is very bad. I mean, if he goes

to the permit office tomorrow morning,

they're gonna shut down our build

and make us rip open all the walls again. Well,

when would we be able to open? In a world where

we could even afford the repairs-- who knows?

I'm just saying, the man's already in the building,

you don't even need to snatch him.

She revisiting

earlier "murder Farnsby" pitch.

Is most fun idea currently on table.

Here's a thought. Obviously, you can't fix

the pipes before tomorrow morning,

but maybe you can fix the Farnsbys' relationship.

Sass is saying we should try to get

Henry and Margaret back together.

Well, that's true.

He was gonna let the pipe thing slide

before he found out that you ruined their marriage.

That was Pete's fault. I pointed to a book.

Lady Farnsby did mention

there was one specific thing

that she most angry about. Yes.

So we just need to find out what Henry did

so that he can make up for it. I guess I could talk to her.

No, 'cause then she's gonna know that we know and we just

passed the information on to Henry.

She needs to think that

he remembered on his own.

If I may-- you have ghosts.

This sounds like a job for the old

property-leaving guy.

I can go over there and talk to some of their ghosts.

No need. Thor yell. Nice try, marriage ruiner.

Bjorn!

Have very important question for you!

Need to know why

lady Farnsby is mad at man Farnsby!

She says is very specific reason!

I know the answer, Father!

Man Farnsby forget anniversary!

Have heard her discussing

angrily on phone with her sister!

Jay, Thor's son is saying

that Henry forgot their wedding anniversary.

Interesting.

She also mad about people who turn around in her driveway!

Mind if I take a seat?

It's a free country, thanks to you.

I find it quite touching you made an effort

to learn about my interests.

You are thoughtful and caring,

whereas I am selfish and inconsiderate.

And, honestly...

I'm not sure I ever really deserved you.

That's a common sentiment in the shed.

I know I said it at the time,

and it doesn't begin to make up

for the way I've treated you, but...

I am truly sorry.

Thank you.

I do think, in retrospect,

we may have been rushing into things,

or at least you were.

What do you mean?

You haven't had a lot of experience, whereas I...

Let's just say my body count is quite high,

and I'm not talking about the war.

Okay, moving right along.

Here's an idea. What do you think about-- I don't know--

being friends?

I'd like that.

Good. Oh.

I'm glad we had this talk, Lieutenant.

So,

what's been going on in the house since I moved out?

Oh, um, well, the Puritan moved out,

and Sam is a convicted witch.

I tried something new with my hair.

Oh, did you, now? Yes, everyone loved it.

Oh.

I confess I-I'm no expert in manual labor,

but they don't appear to be doing any actual work.

They're laying a trap for Henry Farnsby.

What is that infernal racket?

Why do you toil on this doomed enterprise

that I will be burying under red tape come sunup?

We toil, Henry, to lure you here.

Excuse me?

Sam, I got the merlot and The Lovely Bones.

Let's get into it... Henry.

What is he doing here? He's here

to surprise you with your belated

anniversary dinner.

What?

Our anniversary

is why I planned this dinner, my darling.

Oh, Henry, you finally remembered.

Better late than never. I have been

a neglectful gardener,

and for that, I am sorry.

Can you believe it was 20 years ago

that we celebrated that magical event?

Our first group thing.

Excuse me? Oh, that's what this is.

This isn't their wedding anniversary? I don't know, Jay,

but it seems to be working, just go with it. I remember it

like it was yesterday.

I looked in your eyes, then you looked in Phil's eyes,

then Phil looked in Brenda's eye...

Well, you remember it, you were there.

Happy orgi-versary, my love.

Happy orgi-versary.

Let me show you to your seats.

I-I'll be right there, dear. Uh... Uh,

about our little problem--

I am happy to look the other way.

Thank you, jam bro.

You're welcome.

Would you like to join us? God, no.

I mean... I got to cook and stuff.

Of course.

Hey, babe. Just to ask-- Hmm?

y-you think our marriage is good, right? Like, um,

your chrysanthemum's being watered?

Of course, Jay.

It's just, if anything ever was bothering you,

I just want us to be able to communicate about it.

Aw. You're the sweetest. Mm.

You know...

now is not a bad time to do a little gardening.

Okay, well, let me just get my... sun hat.

What? I don't know. I'm not good with metaphors.

Just shut up. Mm.

Mm.

It's a dinosaur lamp. Can you believe it?

And it arrived so quickly.

Samantha ordered it for me on Amazon Prime

since I heroically surrendered the dinosaur bed. Isaac

very good at surrendering. It changes color

when you press the button.

It's very neat. You have to see it.

But we can't press button.

Oh, not a problem. Sam!

Sam, I need you!

Sam! Sam!

What's happening? The button!

This gift was a big mistake.

Sam...!

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Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org