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1
00:00:09,133 --> 00:00:11,552
What?
A breakfast that size
2
00:00:11,844 --> 00:00:14,638
is meant for people who work
in a field for 12 hours.
3
00:00:14,930 --> 00:00:18,267
The rest of my day is open,
so maybe that's what I'll do.
4
00:00:18,559 --> 00:00:22,730
Guys, Barefoot Pedaler
is playing at the Wheelhouse.
5
00:00:23,022 --> 00:00:24,857
Wow. A '90s hippie jam band.
6
00:00:25,149 --> 00:00:28,027
I'd rather listen to myself,
being shot in the face.
7
00:00:28,318 --> 00:00:31,530
Max, we've had some awesome
nights with the Pedalers.
8
00:00:31,822 --> 00:00:32,531
We had one of our first
dates at a show.
9
00:00:33,574 --> 00:00:35,034
Yeah, we did.
10
00:00:35,325 --> 00:00:37,745
He was the only black guy there.
I was like Rosa Parks,
11
00:00:38,037 --> 00:00:39,872
except for something
that didn't matter.
12
00:00:40,164 --> 00:00:41,874
We need to go
to this Pedalers show.
13
00:00:42,166 --> 00:00:43,917
They haven't played
in Chicago in years.
14
00:00:44,209 --> 00:00:44,543
I will attend ironically.
15
00:00:45,586 --> 00:00:47,296
It'd be great
to see Tommy again.
16
00:00:47,588 --> 00:00:49,673
Here it comes.
I'm telling you, here it comes.
17
00:00:49,965 --> 00:00:51,925
It was December '99.
Here it is.
18
00:00:52,217 --> 00:00:53,927
And it was right after
Pedaler got huge,
19
00:00:54,219 --> 00:00:56,305
but, like, before
they got small again.
20
00:00:56,597 --> 00:00:58,724
He was the best electric
fiddler in the world,
21
00:00:59,016 --> 00:01:01,852
and l...
l was just a girl.
22
00:01:02,144 --> 00:01:04,855
We made love like warrior poets.
23
00:01:05,147 --> 00:01:07,149
How do you even do that?
And then he invited me
24
00:01:07,441 --> 00:01:10,069
to tour with them, but I had
an early morning psych final.
25
00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:12,946
I got a B-minus
and I'm still single.
26
00:01:13,238 --> 00:01:16,241
Ridiculously long story short,
Penny was a groupie
27
00:01:16,533 --> 00:01:18,577
and now she may or may not
have the herp.
28
00:01:18,869 --> 00:01:22,664
I was so not a groupie, okay?
He was super into me.
29
00:01:22,956 --> 00:01:24,374
If you don't believe me,
ask Alex.
30
00:01:24,666 --> 00:01:26,710
Who is not here.
31
00:01:27,002 --> 00:01:29,588
Wait, guys, did you not
invite Alex because of me?
32
00:01:30,631 --> 00:01:31,715
- No.
- Not at all.
33
00:01:32,007 --> 00:01:33,092
Mm-mm.
- She's busy.
34
00:01:33,383 --> 00:01:35,427
Uh, we gotta go.
Oh, we do.
35
00:01:35,719 --> 00:01:38,097
We do have to go.
I haven't finished my coffee.
36
00:01:38,388 --> 00:01:39,932
Oh, it's okay, take it to go.
37
00:01:40,224 --> 00:01:43,811
Mm! Argh, I burned my mouth.
38
00:01:44,103 --> 00:01:47,022
Guys, what's the rush?
Aren't we gonna hang out?
39
00:01:47,314 --> 00:01:49,441
Oh, we actually
have to go to, um...
40
00:01:49,733 --> 00:01:51,443
My grandma's funeral.
What?
41
00:01:51,735 --> 00:01:55,239
It's a new Tyler Perry movie.
Yeah, yeah, hmm.
42
00:01:55,531 --> 00:01:57,741
See you guys later.
See you, bye.
43
00:01:59,868 --> 00:02:01,161
Hey, guys.
44
00:02:01,453 --> 00:02:04,164
Hey, Alex.
Ready for breakfast?
45
00:02:04,456 --> 00:02:06,250
Starving.
Mm-hm.
46
00:02:21,098 --> 00:02:22,766
What?
Oh, I forgot to tell you guys,
47
00:02:23,058 --> 00:02:24,893
Barefoot Pedaler's in town.
We should go.
48
00:02:25,185 --> 00:02:27,229
Um...
I can't that night.
49
00:02:27,521 --> 00:02:28,772
I haven't told you what night.
50
00:02:29,064 --> 00:02:30,816
You did.
No.
51
00:02:31,108 --> 00:02:34,278
You did, yeah.
I think I left my... My keys.
52
00:02:34,570 --> 00:02:36,321
What's going on?
Dave?
53
00:02:36,613 --> 00:02:38,115
Is this what's happening now?
54
00:02:38,407 --> 00:02:40,951
You rush me out because
you have plans with Alex?
55
00:02:41,243 --> 00:02:43,745
No, what?
No. What?
56
00:02:44,037 --> 00:02:46,540
No, ha, ha. What? No.
You're in a loop, babe.
57
00:02:46,832 --> 00:02:50,377
I cannot believe
you double-booked breakfast.
58
00:02:50,669 --> 00:02:53,046
Wait, what's going on?
I don't know.
59
00:02:53,338 --> 00:02:54,381
I was just here with them.
60
00:02:54,673 --> 00:02:56,300
Nope.
Yes.
61
00:02:56,592 --> 00:02:59,887
We haven't seen you.
You're gonna Groundhog Day me?
62
00:03:00,179 --> 00:03:02,014
You're scaring us.
We haven't seen you.
63
00:03:02,306 --> 00:03:04,725
You double-booked
breakfast to keep us apart?
64
00:03:05,017 --> 00:03:07,811
We had to. It has been brutal
to hang out with you guys.
65
00:03:08,103 --> 00:03:10,147
Maybe it has something to do
with your wedding.
66
00:03:10,439 --> 00:03:11,982
No!
67
00:03:12,274 --> 00:03:15,485
Dave, I'm sorry.
I can't do this.
68
00:03:18,614 --> 00:03:20,490
Okay.
Whoo!
69
00:03:20,782 --> 00:03:24,912
I mean, it could be
something else, but it's not.
70
00:03:25,204 --> 00:03:29,458
Okay. That happened,
but we are moving on.
71
00:03:29,750 --> 00:03:31,501
Are you? Every time
you're together,
72
00:03:31,793 --> 00:03:34,880
it seems like anything
can trigger a huge fight.
73
00:03:35,172 --> 00:03:38,508
So what are we doing tonight?
Chinese food or pizza pizza?
74
00:03:38,800 --> 00:03:40,719
Oh, Alex does not like
Chinese food.
75
00:03:41,011 --> 00:03:42,471
What? I never said that.
76
00:03:42,763 --> 00:03:45,224
It's just we used to order
cashew chicken all the time.
77
00:03:45,515 --> 00:03:47,976
Sorry if I got bored
of cashew chicken.
78
00:03:48,268 --> 00:03:51,772
Really. Now you can have
any kind of chicken you want.
79
00:03:52,064 --> 00:03:54,566
Sweet and sour chicken,
lemon chicken,
80
00:03:54,858 --> 00:03:57,152
you can have any filthy chicken
you pick up at a bar,
81
00:03:57,444 --> 00:03:59,321
or meet at the gym,
because I'll tell you,
82
00:03:59,613 --> 00:04:02,908
you are never getting
cashew chicken again.
83
00:04:03,200 --> 00:04:05,369
I don't think
he's talking about chicken.
84
00:04:05,661 --> 00:04:08,705
You are one of my oldest friends
and you are my sister,
85
00:04:08,997 --> 00:04:10,249
and I love you both.
86
00:04:10,540 --> 00:04:13,585
But it's just easier
to do things separately.
87
00:04:13,877 --> 00:04:15,671
"Things?"
So it's not just breakfast?
88
00:04:15,963 --> 00:04:18,090
Breakfast, dinners,
drinks, movies.
89
00:04:18,382 --> 00:04:19,549
We had to rent The Road twice,
90
00:04:19,841 --> 00:04:21,635
and it is not that funny
the second time.
91
00:04:21,927 --> 00:04:24,137
So this is why you didn't
wanna go to the concert
92
00:04:24,429 --> 00:04:25,847
because you were
going with Dave.
93
00:04:26,139 --> 00:04:28,350
It's ridiculous.
We're fine.
94
00:04:28,642 --> 00:04:29,810
Right, Dave?
95
00:04:30,102 --> 00:04:32,020
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
96
00:04:32,312 --> 00:04:33,397
In fact, we are so fine
97
00:04:33,689 --> 00:04:36,316
I think we should go
to the concert together.
98
00:04:36,608 --> 00:04:38,235
- Really?
- Great idea.
99
00:04:38,527 --> 00:04:40,862
- You guys cool with that?
- Yes.
100
00:04:41,154 --> 00:04:42,948
Of course.
Okay. Hey, cool.
101
00:04:43,240 --> 00:04:44,449
This is gonna be awesome.
102
00:04:44,741 --> 00:04:46,868
This'll be terrible.
They say they're fine,
103
00:04:47,160 --> 00:04:49,037
and one small thing
is gonna trigger them.
104
00:04:49,329 --> 00:04:51,123
They always
try to get me to take sides.
105
00:04:51,415 --> 00:04:52,916
Let me ask you a question, Brad.
106
00:04:53,208 --> 00:04:55,544
You think
cashew chicken is boring,
107
00:04:55,836 --> 00:04:58,297
or do you think cashew chicken
is a total catch
108
00:04:58,588 --> 00:05:01,633
any lady would be lucky
enough to eat, and in fact,
109
00:05:01,925 --> 00:05:05,012
cashew chicken passed up
on a lot of hot, smoking ass.
110
00:05:05,304 --> 00:05:06,847
Oh, right.
Because cashew chicken
111
00:05:07,139 --> 00:05:09,141
is a completely loyal chicken.
112
00:05:11,435 --> 00:05:12,853
I'm actually allergic to nuts.
113
00:05:13,145 --> 00:05:14,855
I don't want
Dave and Alex there.
114
00:05:15,147 --> 00:05:17,566
Already gonna be crazy enough
when I see Tommy again.
115
00:05:17,858 --> 00:05:20,193
Oh, my God.
Our chemistry was explosive.
116
00:05:20,485 --> 00:05:22,112
It was like Whitney and Bobby.
117
00:05:22,404 --> 00:05:23,655
Eli Whitney and Justin Bobby?
118
00:05:23,947 --> 00:05:26,074
Also two people
that mean nothing to each other.
119
00:05:26,366 --> 00:05:29,661
If I didn't mean anything,
who's the song "Jenny" about?
120
00:05:29,953 --> 00:05:33,623
A girl named Jenny?
No, "Jenny" is Penny.
121
00:05:33,915 --> 00:05:34,833
Think about it.
Take the J, flip it,
122
00:05:35,876 --> 00:05:37,586
close the loop,
what do you have?
123
00:05:37,878 --> 00:05:39,004
Lower-case B?
No.
124
00:05:39,296 --> 00:05:41,423
A lower-case D?
No, flip it the other way.
125
00:05:41,715 --> 00:05:43,008
Q.
No, Penny.
126
00:05:43,300 --> 00:05:45,093
Oh.
127
00:05:45,385 --> 00:05:47,763
This sucks. I mean,
I just wanna go and party
128
00:05:48,055 --> 00:05:50,265
and not worry about
babysitting Dave and Alex.
129
00:05:50,557 --> 00:05:51,892
I already have it in my phone,
130
00:05:52,184 --> 00:05:56,063
Friday night, 9 p.m.
till "question mark" rage.
131
00:05:56,355 --> 00:05:58,190
And I do not mean
a small rage, I mean,
132
00:05:58,482 --> 00:06:02,027
like, Mardi Gras style rage,
okay? Heh.
133
00:06:07,157 --> 00:06:09,326
"Let the good times roll."
When Jane gets drunk,
134
00:06:09,618 --> 00:06:11,495
she turns into
a Creole riverboat captain.
135
00:06:11,787 --> 00:06:14,831
Guarantee.
No more True Blood for you.
136
00:06:15,123 --> 00:06:17,501
Jane's right. if they come,
we're not gonna have fun.
137
00:06:17,793 --> 00:06:19,503
It'll turn into
the Dave and Alex show.
138
00:06:19,795 --> 00:06:21,797
We know what to do.
139
00:06:22,089 --> 00:06:23,673
So Brad and Jane
can't go to the show.
140
00:06:23,965 --> 00:06:26,385
Jane's throwing up because
she's got food poisoning.
141
00:06:26,676 --> 00:06:29,221
Brad's throwing up because
he can't see others throw up.
142
00:06:29,513 --> 00:06:31,223
It's a general puke spiral
over there.
143
00:06:31,515 --> 00:06:33,934
Penny and Max called and said
they can't come, either.
144
00:06:34,226 --> 00:06:36,728
Penny got locked in a mall
and Max found a baby.
145
00:06:37,020 --> 00:06:40,273
What? Ridiculous. They can't
even come up with good excuses.
146
00:06:40,565 --> 00:06:42,692
They just don't wanna see us.
Yeah, this sucks.
147
00:06:42,984 --> 00:06:45,362
I really wanted to see the show.
Yeah, me too.
148
00:06:45,654 --> 00:06:47,364
Maybe we should just go.
149
00:06:47,656 --> 00:06:49,032
Unless...
No.
150
00:06:49,324 --> 00:06:51,868
Unless you don't wanna hang.
No, let's totally go.
151
00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:53,703
We should go on
a road trip together.
152
00:06:53,995 --> 00:06:56,331
We could see every ballpark
in America.
153
00:06:56,623 --> 00:06:59,000
Uh, why don't we just
start with a concert?
154
00:06:59,292 --> 00:07:00,502
Yeah, okay.
155
00:07:02,254 --> 00:07:04,131
Hey.
Hey.
156
00:07:04,423 --> 00:07:06,425
All right.
Oh. Ha, ha.
157
00:07:06,716 --> 00:07:10,679
This isn't gonna be weird.
No, gonna be totes normal.
158
00:07:10,971 --> 00:07:12,389
Except I just said "totes."
159
00:07:12,681 --> 00:07:14,182
Let's show what they're missing.
160
00:07:14,474 --> 00:07:15,517
Okay.
Okay.
161
00:07:15,809 --> 00:07:17,644
Ready?
Yeah.
162
00:07:17,936 --> 00:07:20,355
Nice. Wish we could see
their faces when they get this.
163
00:07:20,647 --> 00:07:21,606
Yeah.
164
00:07:30,490 --> 00:07:34,077
Hey, guys.
We just got your text.
165
00:07:36,329 --> 00:07:37,914
What's going on?
166
00:07:38,206 --> 00:07:39,958
First you lie to us
and then you show up without us?
167
00:07:41,001 --> 00:07:42,461
I know this looks bad,
168
00:07:42,752 --> 00:07:44,629
but we didn't think
you were gonna come.
169
00:07:44,921 --> 00:07:46,548
Dude, how is that a defense?
170
00:07:46,840 --> 00:07:48,967
I can't believe
you guys came together.
171
00:07:49,259 --> 00:07:50,719
Yeah, we did,
because we're fine,
172
00:07:51,011 --> 00:07:52,762
like I told you
a bajillion times.
173
00:07:53,054 --> 00:07:54,931
You do know that
that's not a real number?
174
00:07:55,223 --> 00:07:56,224
Because you use it a lot.
175
00:07:56,516 --> 00:07:58,435
Neither is "bagina."
Not a real word.
176
00:07:58,727 --> 00:08:01,688
Guys, come on. What better way
to bring us back together
177
00:08:01,980 --> 00:08:03,815
than to go to a Pedalers show?
178
00:08:04,107 --> 00:08:06,568
I mean, come on,
let's be the college us.
179
00:08:06,860 --> 00:08:10,238
Yeah. Who dat say we ain't
gonna have some fun, huh?
180
00:08:10,530 --> 00:08:13,492
Who dat? Who dat say
we ain't gonna have some fun?
181
00:08:13,783 --> 00:08:14,868
Who dat? Who dat?
182
00:08:15,160 --> 00:08:16,995
Mm-hm, mm-hm, pump the brakes,
James Carville.
183
00:08:20,415 --> 00:08:23,710
White guy with rainbow dreads,
drink!
184
00:08:24,002 --> 00:08:25,795
Oh, girl with armpit hair,
leg hair.
185
00:08:26,087 --> 00:08:27,964
Jon Lovitz, drink, bitches.
186
00:08:30,383 --> 00:08:32,177
I have no idea
how you win this game,
187
00:08:32,469 --> 00:08:34,012
but I'm positive
Jane is in the lead.
188
00:08:34,304 --> 00:08:35,931
- In the lead.
- Really.
189
00:08:36,223 --> 00:08:38,850
How are you more drunk than me?
Because I pre-gamed.
190
00:08:39,142 --> 00:08:41,561
Let's play a new game called
"Feed my wife some food."
191
00:08:41,853 --> 00:08:44,439
I'm gonna grab you something.
I wish we were closer.
192
00:08:44,731 --> 00:08:46,650
I kinda like chilling back here.
193
00:08:46,942 --> 00:08:48,944
I hear you.
You want me to go backstage,
194
00:08:49,236 --> 00:08:51,655
talk to Tommy, see if he can
get us a table up front?
195
00:08:51,947 --> 00:08:54,199
No one said that.
Message received. Arm twisted.
196
00:08:54,491 --> 00:08:55,700
I wanna let him know I'm here,
197
00:08:55,992 --> 00:08:57,827
in case he wants me
when they sing "Jenny."
198
00:08:58,119 --> 00:08:59,621
Think she'll come to her senses?
199
00:08:59,913 --> 00:09:01,331
I don't have to be
on Penny patrol?
200
00:09:01,623 --> 00:09:04,918
I still look 20, right?
Yeesh.
201
00:09:05,210 --> 00:09:08,004
I got it.
See? We're having fun.
202
00:09:08,296 --> 00:09:10,048
And it's only getting better.
It's called closure.
203
00:09:11,091 --> 00:09:13,927
The wedding is behind us,
I sent back all the gifts,
204
00:09:14,219 --> 00:09:18,348
wrote the thank you notes, done.
You sent thank you notes?
205
00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:22,477
What'd you say?
What Emily Post recommended.
206
00:09:22,769 --> 00:09:23,812
We are returning your gift
207
00:09:24,104 --> 00:09:25,855
because the wedding
didn't take place.
208
00:09:26,147 --> 00:09:28,358
Kind of vague.
That's like saying
209
00:09:28,650 --> 00:09:31,194
the rest of JFK's tour
of Dallas did not take place.
210
00:09:31,486 --> 00:09:34,239
- What was I supposed to write?
- There's a trigger.
211
00:09:34,531 --> 00:09:38,493
Here come the fireworks.
No. We're fine, we're fine.
212
00:09:38,785 --> 00:09:41,121
We are not airing
our dirty laundry in public.
213
00:09:41,413 --> 00:09:43,331
Yeah. No more laundry,
mon chére.
214
00:09:43,623 --> 00:09:47,877
Her undies are clean and
they're stacked in the drawer,
215
00:09:48,169 --> 00:09:50,297
next to the socks,
which are in the little balls.
216
00:09:50,589 --> 00:09:51,756
Ha, ha.
Clean clothes.
217
00:09:52,048 --> 00:09:54,884
Woman, put this veggie burrito
in you now.
218
00:09:55,176 --> 00:09:57,429
I'm drunk.
219
00:09:57,721 --> 00:10:00,557
I've done this a million times.
Act like you belong.
220
00:10:05,854 --> 00:10:09,774
Ha, shut up, Steven Tyler. No,
you know I love mahjong.
221
00:10:10,066 --> 00:10:11,901
Mahjong?
Ha, ha, oh, Steven Tyler,
222
00:10:12,193 --> 00:10:14,321
okay, I gotta go
because I gotta head backstage.
223
00:10:14,613 --> 00:10:19,367
You're not going without a pass.
Hey, listen, handsome.
224
00:10:19,659 --> 00:10:22,078
You know, let me let you in
on a little secret.
225
00:10:22,370 --> 00:10:25,957
Um, me and Tommy, you know,
the electric fiddle player,
226
00:10:26,249 --> 00:10:29,711
we have a history,
and it's a sex history.
227
00:10:30,003 --> 00:10:32,672
Is your plan to make things
super awkward?
228
00:10:32,964 --> 00:10:36,926
It's not awkward.
Actually, it is.
229
00:10:37,218 --> 00:10:39,679
Hey, can I, uh, get four beers,
230
00:10:39,971 --> 00:10:41,765
and I promised
my super-drunk friend
231
00:10:42,057 --> 00:10:43,141
that I would ask,
do you guys have po'boys?
232
00:10:44,184 --> 00:10:47,020
Shut the front door, Dave Rose.
233
00:10:47,312 --> 00:10:50,440
D-Rose, in the hizzy.
What's up, bro?
234
00:10:50,732 --> 00:10:52,776
Hey, Brody Daniels?
What's up?
235
00:10:53,068 --> 00:10:54,653
What's up, man?
Yeah, man.
236
00:10:54,944 --> 00:10:58,406
I haven't seen you since you got
arrested for breaking into...
237
00:10:58,698 --> 00:11:00,492
Kelly Kirkpatrick's dorm room.
238
00:11:00,784 --> 00:11:04,120
Yeah, man. Boom, married her.
Boom, boom, two kids.
239
00:11:04,412 --> 00:11:05,664
Ooh.
Doing good, man.
240
00:11:05,955 --> 00:11:07,165
Got this landscaping thing
going. It's cool.
241
00:11:08,208 --> 00:11:11,252
Let me know if you need
any light-up rocks.
242
00:11:11,544 --> 00:11:13,421
That's awesome,
congrats on the rocks.
243
00:11:13,713 --> 00:11:14,964
Thanks so much.
Whoa,
244
00:11:15,256 --> 00:11:17,258
I saw that YouTube thing,
that wedding thing?
245
00:11:17,550 --> 00:11:20,053
Dude, that was a real kick
in the downstairs stuff, bro.
246
00:11:20,345 --> 00:11:22,263
No, thanks, man,
I appreciate that.
247
00:11:22,555 --> 00:11:24,974
Dude, no, man, I appreciated it.
248
00:11:25,266 --> 00:11:27,143
Everyone on my e-mail list
appreciated it.
249
00:11:27,435 --> 00:11:28,687
Jane's over the po'boy,
250
00:11:28,978 --> 00:11:30,939
but now she wants to call
her ex-boyfriends.
251
00:11:31,231 --> 00:11:33,775
Whoa, you're hanging out?
You hang out with the girl
252
00:11:34,067 --> 00:11:36,361
that snipped
your speed bag, bro?
253
00:11:36,653 --> 00:11:37,987
What?
Dude.
254
00:11:38,279 --> 00:11:41,241
Uh, actually,
we are back together.
255
00:11:41,533 --> 00:11:43,326
That's right.
I came crawling back.
256
00:11:43,618 --> 00:11:45,787
I was an idiot.
Dave is an amazing man
257
00:11:46,079 --> 00:11:48,665
and an incredible lover,
really good lover.
258
00:11:48,957 --> 00:11:51,459
Stamos good.
So you guys are back together?
259
00:11:51,751 --> 00:11:54,379
Yeah.
Uh, cool. Ha, ha.
260
00:11:54,671 --> 00:11:58,550
Makes the video less funny,
I guess, but, uh, congrats.
261
00:11:58,842 --> 00:12:01,136
Peace, D-Rose.
Wow, dodged a bullet there.
262
00:12:01,428 --> 00:12:03,388
Thank you.
What were you thinking?
263
00:12:03,680 --> 00:12:05,557
I didn't like the way
he was laughing at us.
264
00:12:05,849 --> 00:12:07,809
He wasn't laughing at us, Alex,
265
00:12:08,101 --> 00:12:09,477
he was laughing at me,
all right?
266
00:12:09,769 --> 00:12:11,938
Everybody is laughing.
I thought I was helping.
267
00:12:12,230 --> 00:12:13,565
Yeah, you help me.
268
00:12:13,857 --> 00:12:16,317
You helped me get famous,
helped me get my speed bag cut,
269
00:12:16,609 --> 00:12:18,486
helped max out
my credit cards for a wedding
270
00:12:18,778 --> 00:12:20,530
that never happened.
What up, players?
271
00:12:20,822 --> 00:12:23,742
What's going on?
Everybody having a good time?
272
00:12:24,033 --> 00:12:26,369
Oh, come on!
273
00:12:32,751 --> 00:12:34,711
If you're still so mad,
why did you even come?
274
00:12:35,003 --> 00:12:37,130
You said you were fine.
Did he not say he was fine?
275
00:12:37,422 --> 00:12:39,632
He said some things,
you said some things.
276
00:12:39,924 --> 00:12:42,427
Really just came
to get coffee for my wife.
277
00:12:42,719 --> 00:12:44,596
Know what? I thought I was.
I wanna be fine.
278
00:12:44,888 --> 00:12:47,223
But I think that Jane
is kinda right here,
279
00:12:47,515 --> 00:12:50,143
I'll feel okay, and then
something will trigger my anger.
280
00:12:50,435 --> 00:12:52,353
So one jackass frat boy
saw the video.
281
00:12:52,645 --> 00:12:55,064
His name's Brody. No one
with that name ever mattered.
282
00:12:55,356 --> 00:12:57,442
No, not just one frat boy.
283
00:12:57,734 --> 00:13:00,653
All of our friends and
thousands of complete strangers.
284
00:13:00,945 --> 00:13:03,573
They're not just watching,
they're getting creative.
285
00:13:03,865 --> 00:13:06,242
Yeah, show her, Brad.
Still waiting on that coffee.
286
00:13:06,534 --> 00:13:07,702
Anytime.
I got it.
287
00:13:07,994 --> 00:13:11,873
Some Spanish DJ decided
to make a little autotune.
288
00:13:19,380 --> 00:13:21,966
That's awful.
Catchy, though.
289
00:13:22,258 --> 00:13:24,761
Okay. But you know,
people will move on
290
00:13:25,053 --> 00:13:26,888
to the next hot viral video
in, like, a day.
291
00:13:27,180 --> 00:13:29,057
Some fat kid
will get stuck in a door.
292
00:13:29,349 --> 00:13:31,059
Why do you keep trying
to whitewash this
293
00:13:31,351 --> 00:13:33,061
as if this never happened?
294
00:13:33,353 --> 00:13:35,355
Because it was horrible
and it was my fault.
295
00:13:35,647 --> 00:13:39,901
I appreciate you saying
that to me and Brad, Al, okay,
296
00:13:40,193 --> 00:13:42,695
but you know what? The damage is
done, okay,
297
00:13:42,987 --> 00:13:44,739
and there's no
taking it back now, so...
298
00:13:45,031 --> 00:13:46,199
Coffee.
299
00:13:46,491 --> 00:13:49,160
Stings a bit.
300
00:13:49,452 --> 00:13:52,789
No, wait, Brad, what do I do?
Please, help me.
301
00:13:54,582 --> 00:13:56,084
Honestly,
you embarrassed the guy
302
00:13:56,376 --> 00:13:57,961
in front of everyone
he's ever known.
303
00:13:58,253 --> 00:14:00,672
It'd be great if
there was some way for you
304
00:14:00,964 --> 00:14:03,132
to set the record straight
in front of all of them
305
00:14:03,424 --> 00:14:08,304
but unfortunately we're not
in a romantic comedy, so...
306
00:14:16,229 --> 00:14:18,690
That's me.
He wrote that song about me.
307
00:14:18,982 --> 00:14:20,525
Is your name Jenny?
Check and mate.
308
00:14:20,817 --> 00:14:23,403
Poetic license.
Ever heard of a taser license?
309
00:14:23,695 --> 00:14:25,738
Okay, all right, that's real.
310
00:14:26,030 --> 00:14:27,574
Oh, my God, that's him.
311
00:14:27,866 --> 00:14:30,869
Tommy.
Hey, Tommy.
312
00:14:31,160 --> 00:14:34,914
Yeah?
It's Penny, Jenny.
313
00:14:35,206 --> 00:14:37,667
Remember Kenosha? We spent
the night of Y2K together
314
00:14:37,959 --> 00:14:39,836
on top of your tour bus
drinking boxed wine?
315
00:14:40,128 --> 00:14:43,214
We stayed up talking about
whether we'd be able to use
316
00:14:43,506 --> 00:14:47,135
our ATM cards in the morning
and you told me you loved me?
317
00:14:47,427 --> 00:14:52,015
Yeah, I'm sorry, babe, it's...
318
00:14:52,307 --> 00:14:54,475
It's hard to keep track
of all the broken hearts.
319
00:14:54,767 --> 00:14:55,768
One love?
320
00:14:58,813 --> 00:14:59,898
Oh, my God.
321
00:15:01,441 --> 00:15:02,734
Wait, Penny.
322
00:15:07,071 --> 00:15:09,115
Here you go, dude.
323
00:15:09,407 --> 00:15:11,326
Come on, man,
in what world is that my coat?
324
00:15:11,618 --> 00:15:14,120
Ugh, I can't let Dave leave.
I gotta do something.
325
00:15:14,412 --> 00:15:17,624
Tommy didn't even remember me.
326
00:15:17,916 --> 00:15:19,083
Guys, can we just go, please?
327
00:15:19,375 --> 00:15:20,877
We can't go.
Brad's right.
328
00:15:21,169 --> 00:15:23,379
I need to get up on stage
and make a big speech
329
00:15:23,671 --> 00:15:25,506
because life is like
a romantic comedy.
330
00:15:25,798 --> 00:15:28,343
No, I said life is not like
a romantic comedy.
331
00:15:29,844 --> 00:15:30,970
Maybe it is.
332
00:15:33,765 --> 00:15:35,058
What is she doing?
333
00:15:35,350 --> 00:15:37,018
I don't know,
but she's got crazy eyes.
334
00:15:37,310 --> 00:15:39,979
Excuse me. Move, please.
335
00:15:40,271 --> 00:15:43,441
Whoa.
Whoa!
336
00:15:45,735 --> 00:15:49,155
Dave, wait. I have to set
the record straight. Aah!
337
00:15:49,447 --> 00:15:52,200
Oh, damn, son.
Alex!
338
00:15:52,492 --> 00:15:54,619
Alex! What are you doing, man?
339
00:15:54,911 --> 00:15:56,704
Alex! Alex!
340
00:15:58,831 --> 00:15:59,791
Damn, he went down.
341
00:16:02,335 --> 00:16:03,753
Hilars.
342
00:16:10,385 --> 00:16:12,261
Whoa.
What's up, Tommy?
343
00:16:12,553 --> 00:16:15,098
Do we know you?
If the time is from now on
344
00:16:15,390 --> 00:16:16,808
and the place
is your nightmares.
345
00:16:17,100 --> 00:16:19,268
Excuse me?
I'm here for Penny.
346
00:16:19,560 --> 00:16:21,270
Who?
Jenny?
347
00:16:21,562 --> 00:16:23,189
Penny?
I know you remember her, bro.
348
00:16:23,481 --> 00:16:26,317
Yeah, the girl out front that
thinks I'm in love with her.
349
00:16:26,609 --> 00:16:29,862
Yeah, the crazy chick
that thinks.
350
00:16:30,154 --> 00:16:31,739
Oh, God, she thinks it.
351
00:16:32,031 --> 00:16:33,616
Then how come in April of 2003
352
00:16:33,908 --> 00:16:35,368
did you tell Japanese Tiger Beat
353
00:16:35,660 --> 00:16:37,996
the best date of your life
was on your tour bus
354
00:16:38,287 --> 00:16:40,832
during Y2K drinking boxed wine,
watching the sunrise?
355
00:16:41,124 --> 00:16:42,500
That means you and Penny
had a real thing going on.
356
00:16:43,543 --> 00:16:46,671
Or that means Penny reads
Japanese "Tiger Beat"
357
00:16:46,963 --> 00:16:49,048
and so do you.
358
00:16:49,340 --> 00:16:51,676
I do read it,
359
00:16:53,219 --> 00:16:54,637
when you guys are on the cover.
360
00:16:54,929 --> 00:16:57,306
I mean, I love Barefoot Pedaler.
361
00:16:57,598 --> 00:17:00,059
Do I tell people I don't 'cause
I care what people think?
362
00:17:00,351 --> 00:17:02,270
Yeah. And because
there are no gay hippies,
363
00:17:02,562 --> 00:17:03,980
double true, it's embarrassing.
364
00:17:04,272 --> 00:17:06,816
Mahesh,
I bought your solo album.
365
00:17:07,108 --> 00:17:07,525
No one bought your solo album.
366
00:17:08,568 --> 00:17:10,653
J-Rock, I was there
when you got out of rehab,
367
00:17:10,945 --> 00:17:13,239
holding up the sign
"You'll get them next time."
368
00:17:13,531 --> 00:17:16,701
I mean, I'm a huge Pedal-head.
369
00:17:16,993 --> 00:17:19,495
At least I was,
370
00:17:19,787 --> 00:17:22,915
until you broke the heart of
the coolest girl in the world.
371
00:17:23,207 --> 00:17:27,045
I'm outta here.
I am gone, number one fan.
372
00:17:27,336 --> 00:17:30,089
Peace and out. Just as soon
as you sign one of these.
373
00:17:30,381 --> 00:17:33,301
Could you just, uh, one of these
CDs for me, anybody?
374
00:17:33,593 --> 00:17:37,096
Okay, I'm just gonna grab
some souvies, souvenirs.
375
00:17:37,388 --> 00:17:38,347
Anyone wanna sign that?
376
00:17:40,266 --> 00:17:43,019
That taser hurt
every part of my body.
377
00:17:43,311 --> 00:17:44,771
I know.
378
00:17:45,063 --> 00:17:47,273
I can feel it in my chundle.
379
00:17:47,565 --> 00:17:51,903
I know this is embarrassing,
but did you pee yourself?
380
00:17:52,195 --> 00:17:54,614
I thought I was the only one.
381
00:17:54,906 --> 00:17:55,948
You are.
I was just asking.
382
00:17:56,240 --> 00:17:57,533
I was just asking.
383
00:17:57,825 --> 00:18:00,995
I don't know what I was
thinking, getting up there.
384
00:18:01,287 --> 00:18:02,538
I mean, I just...
385
00:18:02,830 --> 00:18:04,207
I don't know
how to make it right,
386
00:18:04,499 --> 00:18:06,000
but I'm trying to.
387
00:18:06,292 --> 00:18:08,252
I know you are, Alex.
Thank you.
388
00:18:08,544 --> 00:18:11,881
What I don't understand
is why you got up there
389
00:18:12,173 --> 00:18:15,927
even though you're mad at me.
390
00:18:16,219 --> 00:18:18,638
Well, it's because no matter
what happens between us,
391
00:18:18,930 --> 00:18:20,556
I'll always look out
for you, Al.
392
00:18:20,848 --> 00:18:24,227
Make room. This jackass
just stole the shirt
393
00:18:24,519 --> 00:18:26,437
off the bass player.
394
00:18:26,729 --> 00:18:28,981
Walk away.
You don't want any more of me.
395
00:18:29,273 --> 00:18:30,399
Don't do that, man.
396
00:18:36,114 --> 00:18:37,365
You know what's weird?
What?
397
00:18:37,657 --> 00:18:39,784
This is exactly how I thought
the night would go.
398
00:18:40,076 --> 00:18:41,911
It's a standard
triple-tase resolution.
399
00:18:42,203 --> 00:18:43,663
Yup.
I think it's nice.
400
00:18:43,955 --> 00:18:47,625
No matter what happens,
we're here for each other.
401
00:18:47,917 --> 00:18:49,210
- Penny.
- Tommy.
402
00:18:49,502 --> 00:18:51,087
Hey.
Ow.
403
00:18:52,755 --> 00:18:54,632
Sorry. Of course
I remembered you.
404
00:18:54,924 --> 00:18:58,052
You're probably one of
the only girls I remember.
405
00:18:58,344 --> 00:19:00,680
I've slept with
thousands of women,
406
00:19:00,972 --> 00:19:03,641
sometimes two, three at a time
all over the world.
407
00:19:03,933 --> 00:19:06,853
To be honest,
408
00:19:07,145 --> 00:19:08,646
you broke my heart.
409
00:19:08,938 --> 00:19:11,232
I knew you wrote
"Jenny" about me.
410
00:19:11,524 --> 00:19:14,777
Ha, ha, no, I wrote "Jenny"
about my wife Jenny.
411
00:19:15,069 --> 00:19:17,405
But forget about that.
What do you think,
412
00:19:17,697 --> 00:19:19,949
the bus is heading to Kenosha
after the show.
413
00:19:20,241 --> 00:19:23,077
We can be there by sunrise.
You in?
414
00:19:23,369 --> 00:19:25,246
Of course not.
415
00:19:25,538 --> 00:19:28,416
You just admitted to sleeping
with thousands of women,
416
00:19:28,708 --> 00:19:29,917
plus, you're married,
417
00:19:30,209 --> 00:19:33,379
and you're going
to Wisconsin by bus,
418
00:19:33,671 --> 00:19:37,842
and only two of those things
are turn-ons.
419
00:19:38,134 --> 00:19:39,635
Goodbye, Tommy.
420
00:19:41,429 --> 00:19:43,097
- Oh.
- Oh! Oh.
421
00:19:46,267 --> 00:19:48,853
No, I have to go.
422
00:19:49,145 --> 00:19:51,105
So which two are the turn-ons?
423
00:19:51,397 --> 00:19:52,982
A lady never tells.
424
00:19:53,274 --> 00:19:54,775
Wisconsin and buses.
425
00:19:55,067 --> 00:19:56,652
Oh, my God.
426
00:20:04,660 --> 00:20:05,620
Penny!
427
00:20:11,959 --> 00:20:13,836
Oh, you wrote a song about me.
428
00:20:17,423 --> 00:20:19,050
That is so sweet.
429
00:20:22,595 --> 00:20:25,973
Wait. I don't see
how that lyric applies.
430
00:20:26,265 --> 00:20:27,850
Oh, it doesn't.
431
00:20:28,142 --> 00:20:31,103
Uh, it's for this guy, Kenny,
I met at a Spencer's Gifts.
432
00:20:31,395 --> 00:20:33,439
Uh, I changed the first letter
of the name so...
433
00:20:33,731 --> 00:20:38,236
Oh, how nice for him.
I think so.
434
00:20:54,126 --> 00:20:56,754
That's it?
It's where I'm at right now.
33298
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