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- Oh, I see what you did.

Hold on, I got it.

- Pull it through the stitch,
or break the stitch.

- It is broken.

- Okay, perfect.

- Wait a second.

- See? Rip it.

- Hold on, I'm trapped.

Much better.
- [laughs]

- All right, are we ready?

Alexander the Great
was the first one

to really come back
with exotic birds...

and that's when it became
that the privileged class kept

these exotic creatures.

When they were promoting
Alexander the Great,

they said, "In the end,

all that matters
is what you left behind,"

which is not true at all.

And, uh, look, I made my mark
a long time ago.

- Are you comparing yourself
to Alexander?

- No, because, uh, he--

I conquered the world
when I was in my twenties.

He did it when his thirties
and he's dead.

I'm alive.

- What's the world
you've conquered?

- I took the oldest profession
on Earth

and did it better
than anyone on Earth.

And, you know...
Lookit, to be in--

Never again will you see a girl
who's 25 years old

who's living in Beverly Hills

and making the kind of money
I was doing.

- And again, that's it.

Stand up a little bit.

Great.

- Sorry if I give you
a hard time.

- You didn't give me
a hard time,

but you know I wouldn't
let you off the hook

until I had the pictures.

- I know, I know you wouldn't.

The only problem
with the camera

is I feel it robs
my personality, Greg.

- Yeah.
Actually, we're just talking.

Just pretend it's not there.

- I'm building a brothel.

It's really a--
a daunting project,

'cause it's almost like
building a city.

It's because I'm selling men.

I'm not selling women.

- It's original.

- Yeah, and I already did
the girl thing better

than anyone else on Earth,
so why try it again?

- Might as well venture
into new territory.

- Yeah, switch it up a bit.

"Heidi Fleiss"
is kind of synonymous

with sex and money,
and that's the big deal,

but really, I'm just
your average convicted felon.

- Heidi Fleiss.

She's the former
Hollywood madam

known for her infamous
black book.

Police call her
"the madam to the stars."

Selling sex
was her occupation,

the heavies in Hollywood
her clientele.

- I dealt with
very powerful men

that had very busy lives,
and lookit,

when they wanted to get laid,
or company or something,

it's easier
to just call someone

and have exactly
what you want delivered.

I didn't have time for anyone
who was hemming and hawing

about what they're gonna pay,
and this or that.

Give me a call
when you're in town

and we'll work everything out.

- Thank you.
- How've you been?

- Bye-bye.

- 4-29-93.

Conversation between
Detective Sammy Lee

and Heidi Fleiss.

- Alleged Hollywood madam
Heidi Fleiss

was arrested today
outside her Bel Air home.

- She was busted in an
undercover sting operation.

- Heidi's $1,500 call girls

were specifically chosen

for her upper-class clientele.

- The day after
I was arrested,

I remember resting up
on my pool.

My house overlooked

the entire city
of Beverly Hills,

and I'm looking at the city
in my pool,

and I see my phone
just ringing like mad.

And I'm like,
"How did I fuck up

the best job on Earth?"

And I felt this big.

- There are a lot
of nervous people

around Hollywood.

Celebrities who fear
their names

will be associated
with Fleiss.

- Heidi, will you name
some names for us today?

- Heidi will be pleading
"not guilty" to all charges.

- Come on,
let us through, please.

- I--I'm the one to blame.

I sunk my own ship.

And just 'cause I sunk
my own ship doesn't mean

that I have to take
everyone down with me,

and that's why I never
named names.

- We, the jury,
find the defendant,

Heidi Lynne Fleiss,

guilty of the crime
of pandering by procuring

for the purpose
of prostitution.

- We will be asking for bail
pending appeal.

Uh, the appellate process
could take a year or more.

- She's run the gauntlet
in the state court.

It's been reversed.

She's been
prosecuted federally.

They never prosecute
any of the men.

Why single out Heidi Fleiss?

- It's been a nightmare,
and I've tried very hard

to keep a little bit
of dignity.

- She is also charged
with drug possession.

- Stay focused on my recovery,

and hope that, uh--
hope for the best.

I'm not gonna lie about it.

I'm not ashamed of it.

I battled the disease
of addiction.

I have
a substance abuse problem--

um, when I want to.

But lookit, punishment
has never been a deterrent.

- How you doing, Heidi?

- Under a plea agreement
yesterday,

Fleiss will serve
an 18-month state jail term

while serving a 37-month
federal prison term

for money laundering
and tax evasion.

- Every week, hundreds
of men and women arrive

from county jails
throughout the state

at the rate of about 90,000
per year.

- Lookit, no one knows exactly

what I went through in there
but me.

And after a while, I wound up
in solitary confinement

for over 60 days.

It's called "the hole"
or "the shoe."

You're in a cell
all by yourself,

and your food comes
through a slot.

And after 29 days,

anyone kind of goes
a little bit crazy in there.

And...

it's very introspective,
kind of, in a way.

You reflect on your life
and the choices you've made

and what led you to here.

I was sure--I figured one time
I'd get in trouble,

but I didn't know
that it would take up

10 1/2 years of my life,

and I would spend
over three years in a--

a penitentiary
where women will die.

From '96 to 2000
was the boom of computers

and the Internet,

and when I got out
of the penitentiary

I talked to the brother
on my phone.

And he said, "Heidi,
is there anything you want?"

I said, "A computer."

Now, I'm just trying
to readjust to society.

I just spent three years
in lesbian hell.

- Heidi Fleiss told
the "L.A. Times"

she's recovering
from major plastic surgery.

Fleiss says she's broke.

She filed for bankruptcy

and hopes an online venture
to sell a book

will make her some money.

- She is now
very happily engaged

to a famous actor--
Tom Sizemore.

- We're not engaged,
first of all

but we have
a beautiful relationship.

- Heidi, right here!

Oh, yeah!

- According to police sources,
Sizemore told Fleiss

he would, "knock out
her teeth and kill her"

if she testifies
against him.

- Uh, anything to do
with the probation

you were just talking about?

- Maybe a lot had to do
with his probation.

As tough as I am
is as weak as I am,

and I'm sober right now--
eight days.

Which is not very long at all,

but this eight days
may go a lifetime

and it may go six months.

- She's published
two best-selling books,

has been the subject
of two movies,

sold a DVD of sex tips...

- When I got out
of the penitentiary,

I didn't think of going back
into the sex business.

But one day
I was at my store

and Roseanne Arnold came in.

And she said to me,

"Why don't you just go
to Nevada and open up

one of those houses there?"

And I was like, "Oh, no,
those are trailer parks.

I'm Heidi Fleiss, I can't
do something like that."

But, you know,
I kind of slept on it

and I was like, "She's right."

"Just because it's
a trailer park--

mine doesn't have to be
a trailer park."

[bird speaking]
What the fuck?

- I--I'm not a mechanic,

and I think I flooded it.

We're all good.

Michael, start working!

- Come on, I am working!
[unintelligible]

- You want the
"Michael Smallridge Show,"

then hurry up.

- I'm getting the books
as much as I can!

I can't go any faster!
Come on!

- To run General Motors
is much easier than my job.

I dealt with women--

the most difficult commodity
on Earth.

We have our periods,
we fight,

we need our nail polish,
we need clothes.

It's hard to deal with women,

and I ran a awful lot of women

all over the world.

- I love this truck.
Fucking scary.

I like it better
than my Porsche.

Now, I'm from Hollywood,

and I can never
leave Hollywood.

And Las Vegas
is just like Hollywood.

So the closest county
to Las Vegas

where prostitution is legal,
it's Nye County,

and it's a 45-minute drive.

And that's where
I purchased property

to build my stud farm.

- What kind of women
will go to the stud farm?

Every type of woman.

I think from the woman
who works at Pacific Bell

to the DMV
to, uh, very successful women.

- For men I would think,
"Oh, God, it's a buzzkill.

They have to drive an hour
to get laid and--"

But women are different.

It's kind of exciting

and, you know,
you're driving in the desert,

it's a beautiful drive.

- Times have changed
and women are different.

Women make more money,
they're more powerful,

and, hey, it's time
for women to be able to choose.

This community where I live,
I mean, I love it.

It's the wild, wild west.

Where else do you have
prostitution, gambling,

political corruption?

And people walk around,
they carry guns.

- Do you know where
the mop's at?

- Uh, I think in the back
over there.

- The back?
All right?

- Yeah, I believe we got
around them back.

- On the left side?

- Yep.
- Okay.

Oh, there it is.

- Oh, you gotta sit here.

You ain't letting me do this
all by myself, there, big guy.

Put another dollar in.

- Does she live around here?

- That I do not know.

- She lives right across
the street, actually.

- For real, Pahrump--
no one's ever heard of it.

First of all, this town was
just murdered by the name.

"Pahrump."
You know?

It's Indian.
I don't know what it means.

Uh, "water flows quickly,"

or whatever the hell it means.

But they should have named it,
I don't--who cares?

"Little Feather,"
or "Tomahawk,"

or, you know, what--
some other Indian name.

[stammers]
Anything but "Pahrump."

Yo.

- Luckily, where I'm building
my brothel, it's Crystal.

'Cause that's
a beautiful name.

- Hey, ho.

You're a tramp.

Heidi!

Where'd she go?

- Yeah?
- Where are you, hooker?

- Yep.
- Hooker!

- Right here.
- Where?

- Lookit, Michael.
- What's up, ho?

- Okay, look, we have--
- Yeah?

- No fucking way.
- [laughing]

- No way.

Okay, Michael,
we got a problem.

We gotta clean all this up
how we used to have it.

Organized, labeled neatly.

Not one thing out of line.

And in here--come this way.

- Oh, man.
Fuck.

- It's like doing
three moves at once.

All my stuff that's here,
cleaning it out, disinfecting.

You know, my hands--

let me tell you,
they're killing me.

They're bleeding
from working, but it's okay.

They will heal, and everything
is gonna work out.

Can you believe
this is what they did?

- Are you joking?
- That's why you're here.

You're gonna fix it.
- You're joking.

- You're Mr. Fix-It.
- You're joking.

- Lookit, everyone does things
for different reasons.

There's all different levels
of prostitution.

I mean, why should there be
laws on a woman's body?

So if she slept will all
these guys for free,

it would be fine.

But the fact that she takes
money for them, it's illegal.

That's a man saying,
"Uh-uh."

You know?

"We want what you got

but we don't want to have
to pay for it."

- [sighs]
- Here, all this fabrics?

We'll move them over.

So let's make it
a Pandering area really quick.

Did I have sex for money?
A few times.

Was I good at it?
The worst.

I give the worst blowjobs
on Earth.

- Every girls says they give
the best blowjobs on Earth.

Every girl I ever met
says that they're known

for giving the best blowjob.

I'm like, "Rock on.
We have something in common.

"I give the worst,
you give the best.

That's awesome."

- Hi, Mrs. Turner.
- Hi.

- Mr. Turner, nice to meet you.
- Hi. How are you? My pleasure.

- How'd I start
the sex business?

I started when a couple
different parents

would call me
on a Friday night to babysit.

And I couldn't do both
but I didn't want

to lose the money, so I said,

"Hey, I have a friend
who's available."

- Now, you kids behave.

- When I was 13 years old,

in my neighborhood
20 girls worked for me

as a babysitter.

I ran a babysitting ring.

I say it lightly
but, you know,

if this one family--
let's just--the Joneses,

Mr. and Mrs. Jones--
I know that they're kind of

anal retentive about how
their house is clean,

so the person I send over
to babysit couldn't come in

with dirty tennis shoes
untied.

So at a young age
I'd started dealing with

who will go with who.

- She's early.

- Growing up, I didn't
view myself sexual at all.

I would pray at night,
I think when I was 16 or 17,

like, "God, why can't
I have breasts

"like Dolly Parton?

Why can't I be built
like that?"

'Cause I was just
flat-chested and everything.

I mean I was--had braces,
and I was nerdy,

and, you know, skinny
and everything.

But I don't know,

I was interested
by something else.

These are my babies:
my art books.

I get really rare books.

My own baby.

Elvis Presley.

You know why he dyed
his hair black?

To look like Tony Curtis.

And then--okay, this might
sound crazy,

but when I'm thinking
of the brothel...

the layout of a monastery,
if you think about it...

How they--it's like
they all congregate together

and then go separate off
and pray and stuff?

It's like, perfect layout
for a brothel.

There's like your social area
and then you go off, so...

I studied great monasteries.

I'm sure the religious people
will just love that one.

- Do you have a favorite book?

- Um, yeah.

"The Giving Tree"
by Shel Silverstein.

I know it's a child's book,
they say,

but really, it teaches you

about taking advantage
of people,

about sharing,
about being respectful

and loyal.

It's just a very
emotional story

about a boy...

God, embarrassing--who...
[laughs]

He's, uh...

You know the book.

I don't want to get into
the book.

"The Giving Tree" is about
a boy's relationship

with a tree, but of course
it's an analogy for life.

And it's a--a boy growing up

and revisiting the tree.

- What does the tree give him?

- The tree gives him
everything he's got

till he's nothing left,
and the boy wants more.

- Are you like the boy
in "The Giving Tree"?

- Course not, I'm the tree.
[laughs]

Believe it or not,
these panels right here

are probably, like,
$10,000 panels.

That white glass up there
is really cool

because, like, if you did
a bathroom or something in it

you see shadows.

That's really cool.

Naturally, when you move glass,
some of it's gonna get broken.

With me, you know,
somehow I maximized--

you wanna minimize
the breakage, but I couldn't.

You know, things just didn't
go as planned,

so I thought...

the Jew in me, "How do I still
do something?"

I thought, "Okay, we're gonna
build a landmark

with all that broken glass,
and it'll look really cool."

- And the noise I hear
in the background?

- Those are my--
gonna be my birds.

Okay, that's my neighbor,

and she must have--
about, I would say,

roughly 70 exotic birds.

Really beautiful.

Uh, hyacinth macaws,
green-winged macaws,

African greys, cockatoos.

Those beautiful birds,
they all speak.

And she loves them to death

but they're in
little tiny cages.

I happened to move next door

to a bedridden former madam
who had two whorehouses,

and she was even kept
by Colonel Sanders.

I kind of got the warning
to stay away from her

because I think people want
her birds.

There's--there's probably,
you know,

a couple hundred thousand
dollars worth of birds,

so they don't want me in there
taking the birds.

'Cause there's a lot of money
in birds, and I'm thinking,

"Why was I selling bitches?

I could have been
selling birds."

You know, but I'm not
taking the birds.

She'll probably give them to me
'cause I love the birds

and I'll take good care of her.

Here, don't trip
over the plant.

Hello, Marianne?

Marianne, it's Heidi.

Tomorrow is
change-the-paper day,

so try not to show...

the bottoms of the cage.

- Hello.

Come here, Bentley.

Come on.

Marianne, they're scared
of the camera!

- Oh, they'll get over it.

- Hello.

Hi, babies.
- [unintelligible]

- How's my baby?

How's my baby?
Come here.

Why are you so--
why are you so not playing?

What's wrong with you today?

I love every single bird.

I want them to get out
of their cages, though.

Hello, Eric.

- Sing some songs.
- I'm tone deaf.

Come on, come here.

Come on.

- Good, good.

- There you go.
- Okay, now...

- Come on.
- Touch him.

Put the cookies down.
- Okay.

I love you, Eric.

- Yeah.

- Say hi to mama, Eric.

- Hey!
Oh, you're being naughty.

Oh.
- Eric, what's gotten into you?

[Eric speaking]
Pretty birds.

- What'd he say?
- "Pretty bird."

- Come on, Paco.

- Lookit, "Queer Eye
for the Straight Guy."

One of my favorite programs.

- Look who's on me.
The gay bird.

Trying to make me
a lesbian, now.

- You're not the only one
that was wild

when you were young.

I had a lot of very wealthy
sugar daddies.

- I can tell
you were very spoiled.

- I had a house in Las Vegas
before I moved out here.

So I--I was wild
like you were.

- I'm very submissive
to bedridden former madams.

I hope there's no more--
no more on this Earth.

And of course I hit it off
with her right away,

and I know how
these women are.

When they have money
in their hand,

it makes a huge difference.

So I had no problem
giving her

a few thousand dollars
here and there

because I could see right away
her whole thing change.

Let me say good-bye
to the birds.

Say--say good-bye.
You have to stay, Sweet Pea.

- Look at him.

- Sweet Pea, you gotta
stay here, okay?

All right, if you need help,
call me.

- Okay.

- Former Hollywood madam
Heidi Fleiss

wants to get back
into the sex business,

but this time in Nevada,

where it's legal
in some counties.

- Hello?
We're on our way.

We will--you will see us
in three minutes, okay?

Okay.

- Hi! How are you?

There she is.

- How you doing?
- I'm great.

After all this time--
- I'm sorry.

I--you were probably panicked
that I stood you up.

- First of all, she was
two hours-plus late.

I was panicked at first
but I was--

- No, I wouldn't
do that to you.

- Once you called
I felt better about it.

- Okay, aren't you freezing?
Do you have a jacket?

- Yeah, I do.
I have one in my car.

- Get your coat, 'cause it's
really cold where we're going.

- Okay, so we're gonna go
to Crystal?

- We're going to Crystal.
- Oh!

She changed where
we were gonna shoot,

she changed where
we were gonna meet,

she changed the time.

You know, she--so I was
a little bit frazzled.

High heels to go to Crystal.

- Wait, do you want me
to get you some booties?

- No, that's all right.

I'm Kim.
- How you doing?

I'm Mike.
- Hi, Mike.

- This is Michael.
He came with--

my store, Hollywood Madam?

He came with the boulevard.
- Oh, he did?

He came, you just hired him?

- Well, no, no, no.

- Michael.

Michael was, um...

Heidi's "assistant."

- Yeah.
- Very cool.

- Do you really--
have you seen him before?

- No, I have not.
He thought he saw me before.

- Oh, he stalks everyone.
- No, I seen you on TV.

- Oh, okay.

Suddenly, he was in
our news van.

I thought we were going
to your house!

Okay, I'm gonna...
- Well, my house, you gotta--

- I gotta regroup
and rough it.

- She--if you need help,
Michael will help you.

- I got her jacket!
- Don't be afraid to ask him.

- The making of Heidi's
stud farm.

- [laughs]
There you go.

- She's a nervous wreck.
I have her terrified.

I made her take off
her high heels

and put on tennis shoes.

Okay, this is Crystal.

- How the heck are you, Heidi?

- Uh, Heidi is--
- I'm happy to see you.

- I'm happy to see you,
and I'm sorry if I--

if I drove you nutty
with everything,

but, uh, I only function
in chaos.

- According to the dictionary,
horses kept for breeding

are called studs...

And so, too,
are sexually active men.

And a few good guys like that

are exactly what
Heidi Fleiss wants

for her stud farm.

20 of them, to be exact.

Ten more on standby.

And then there's me--
Heidi and I, we're standing

out there in front
of her land, and I say...

So is this like
a castle type thing?

- No. No, no.

- Somebody said it was
gonna be like--

- No. God, no.
- There's so many rumors

out there, Heidi.
- No, no, no.

Meeting someone is hard.

It is.

And people say, "Oh,
any woman could get laid."

Of course, you can get laid.

You can go out--
Michael would have sex

with both of us,
but is that the man

we want to have sex with?

- He stood behind her
in the interview

and you see him in a lot
of our video,

and he's just kind of staring,
which is a little bit unusual.

- You're the only people
who have been out here so far.

I wouldn't let anyone else
out here.

- Well, thank you.
- And you know why?

'Cause Michael told me.
He was such a fan.

- Oh, really?
[laughing]

- I'm the number one fan.

Come on, Kim.
[laughs]

- Thank you, Michael.

I appreciate that.

So which side of the street
do you see it on?

- Oh, this is it.
This is gonna be it.

I wanna be open
within three to four months.

And I'll try and do
solar panels

and stuff like that
to make it eco-friendly.

I have hired architects.

Their design was published
in even a fancy magazine

called "Plan."

- The idea was from an oyster.

An oyster is a very
luxurious product.

It has these two sides.

It's--it's very rough
on the outside

and it's very soft and delicate
on the inside.

But since this is
an experience

addressed to women,

it should have more
than only that.

It should have a lot of...

intimate layers.

- It's larger than life,
it's imposing, it's grand.

When you enter
a place like that,

it has to give that feeling
of opulence, of decadence.

Of something extravagant,
unique.

Like the old days,
when the men were proud

to be seen to go
into speakeasies and whatnot,

women will be proud
to do this.

I don't think it'll be like
a shameful,

dirty little secret at all.

I think it'll be like
a really cool experience.

- We take great pride
in Nye County,

and we have
a very, uh, high regard

for our government.

Remember,
the Nevada Test Site's here.

Yucca Mountain's here.

The Tonopah Test Range
is here.

The Nellis Test Range
is in my county.

To become a brothel owner,
the applicant actually has

to go fill out
this application,

and in it we explain
the ordinances

and what they're responsible
to do.

We don't get
that many applications.

Usually a brothel's been owned

by the individuals
for a while.

I've heard there was
a different type of brothel

being proposed in Nye County,

but we haven't seen
any paperwork,

so that basically is rumor.

I'm a cop.
I need to see facts, you know?

Like, show me--show me
the, uh, you know--

show me the elements
to the crime,

or show me--show me a body,
or show me something tangible.

Not rumor.

This is just my year-and-a-half
of research,

but I'll show you, here's--

this is what everyone's making
such a big deal about.

They say I won't get licensed
because of this one thing.

[clicks tongue]
Give me one second.

Says here...

[sighs]
It was, uh,

"Been convicted of a crime
involving moral turpitude

"unless the Board finds,
upon examination

"of the circumstances
of the crime

"and the applicant's
criminal history,

"that the applicant
does not present

"and is not likely
to present in the future

"a threat to the health,
safety, morals,

or welfare of the residents
of the county."

People say, oh,
my felony conviction

is a problem.

It's not a problem,
'cause there's other

convicted felons that have been
licensed to run brothels.

And, lookit, to be in
the sex business,

it's a hustling business.

You can't be squeaky clean.

I'll just give him a call.

Hey, Charles.

- Hi. How are you?

- Good. How are you?

- There's one guy trying--

there's one guy trying
to, uh, sabotage me.

Some moron who's head
of something called

"The Brothel Association,"
which is really nothing.

But it's okay,
I'm gonna handle that.

- My name is George Flint.

I'm the director

of "The Nevada
Brothel Owners' Association."

It's a group of the gentlemen
and ladies

that own our brothels
here in the state

or legalized ranch--or houses
of prostitution.

Uh, I'm pretty much
their mouthpiece

and their spokesman,
both in a...

public level or a media level

as well as, um,
before our state legislature

and other governmental bodies.

We're selling a product
than an awful lot of people

are never comfortable
commercializing.

And as a result, even though
it's a fact of life,

our business is
the only business that exists

within the business community
that can be--

and has been,
for all practical purposes--

outlawed and done away with,

except in these ten pockets
of Nevada

where we do have it
still legal and regulated.

The downfall seems to be

when the brothels
reach a point

where they're unwilling
to keep a certain amount

of caution in their profile.

We use the term "they get
too high in the brush."

Referring to the sagebrush.

Related to Heidi...

and I've never met the lady,

and I've kind of avoided
meeting her--

but my biggest fear
of Heidi Fleiss

is Heidi Fleiss.

Because she wants to be
Miss Visibility.

She's not content if she isn't

spilling her verbal guts
to the whole world.

- There you go.

- Okay, so--
- So this is our meeting room,

and if I can have two minutes
alone with Miss Heidi Fleiss,

we'll get back together
with you gentlemen

in just a moment.

- All right, I'll see you guys
in a bit.

- Do you have a problem
with me asking you--

- Ask me anything, Jeanna.

- Okay, 'cause some of it
we don't want

to stir up shit
if we don't have to.

- The George Flint guy?

He's the head
of the Brothel Association--

whatever that is.

I don't know.

- I spoke with two members
of our association

who are also
quite high-profile,

and they had both met
with her.

And I said, "Can't you explain
to Ms. Fleiss

"that you can't be
high-profile?

"You can't bring this...

'Katy, bar the door' attitude
into our business."

- Caller, go right ahead.

- I just have
one comment to make.

- Please.
- This is a joke.

You don't seriously believe
that the county commissioners

along with the Sheriff
are gonna vote

you a license, do you?

You really--if you really
believe that,

I got some land down there
in, uh, New Orleans

to sell you.
[laughing]

- Well, you know,
I hope that they do give me

a fair shot because, uh...

uh, just because...
[stammers]

I'm notorious only because
of what I was arrested for.

Uh, 'cause it was se--sex.

But I hope I get a fair shake,

uh, just if I was
anyone else applying.

- This town,
you make 'em mad,

they're gonna come back
after you.

Folks we'll be back
with Heidi Fleiss

in a just a moment.

Stay tuned, get to know
our sponsors.

- Carlson Rock Depot,
located on Belle Vista

at the bottom
of Shadow Mountain.

Our rock can be seen all over
the Pahrump Valley.

Rock isn't just for driveways.

Rock adds to the...
[voice fades]

- I just don't think it'll be
a safe place to live

if we get Heidi Fleiss
and a new brothel out here.

And so, I'm putting my foot
out on a limb for Crystal,

'cause I wanted to retire here.

This is the place
I want to live.

I love my place here.

What can I get you?

- Can I get a Diet Coke?
- Sure, you can.

I do a good business here.

A very good business here.

We had a nine-year loan
on this place

and paid it off
in 4 1/2 years.

These blue dots
are all the people

that have signed my
"No New Brothels in Crystal."

"Commissioners, in as much
as I am a resident

"and/or property owner
in the town of Crystal, Nevada,

"I would not be in favor

of another brothel being opened
in our community."

Let me lock this up
and get the keys.

There's 7th Street
starting with Appaloosa.

There's not too many people
that live down that area.

But we do have houses too.

This is a manufactured home.

And that--to me,
that's a beautiful home.

This is really pretty
when it's not brown

because she has a lawn service.

This is the property
Heidi liked.

All this property out here
is what she bought.

She paid $42,000
for 60 acres.

Which is just totally...

totally shocks me.

'Cause if I knew
it was for sale

for 42,000,
I would have bought it.

So would have a--a lot
of people here.

So it makes you wonder
how she got it.

- See, it was really difficult
to buy the property

'cause everyone wanted
that property.

But I was five, ten steps
ahead of them.

That's why the people
in Crystal hate me

and they have a petition
against me.

It's not 'cause
of the brothel,

it's because I bought
that land.

They wanted that land.

They're like,
"We know Rosalie."

Told that one lady
at the Short Branch Saloon,

"Rosalie is dead,
and she's been dead."

I said, "I'll show you
her death certificate.

She's dead."

Mm.

I explained to them, "I had--

"didn't know any of you
out here.

"I had no advantage
in the process I went through

to buy that property."

And I said, "Sure, I did get it
for whatever."

50,000, 60,000.

And it's worth 4, 5 million.

- Only would happen
in Nye County.

You don't know who she knows.

- When my application
is submitted,

I will provide them
with everything possible.

So thorough that
if I am denied,

it's because I'm Heidi Fleiss.

That's what we call...

discriminating.

Oh, I'll sue all of them.

I'll take this whole town down.

I'm one of six kids.

My father's
a practicing pediatrician.

He's kind of
an intellectual hippie

without the Jerry Garcia, uh,

and, um, Charles Manson
aspect of it.

And my mother, she was
a schoolteacher.

And I had a great family
growing up.

I couldn't have had
a better childhood.

The values
that my parents instilled--

sounds funny coming from me--

my core values and my--whatever

that they instilled on me
and the lessons they taught me,

um, that molded me to be--

uh, although I can be
so hardcore,

I'm a very sensitive
and very emotional person.

I was city chess champion
two years in a row

at the age of 13 and 14
for the city of Los Angeles

but I had a terrible
learning disability

in math class.

And one day someone
brought me to the racetrack,

and I made a bet
on a long shot.

- First place
startles everybody!

- Like a $20 bet on a horse

that came in and paid $68.

Like, a $30 horse,
$34 horse.

And so all of a sudden I make
almost $1,000

in five minutes
at a racetrack,

so naturally I was turned on
by the instant gratification

of something else than school.

And then I learned--
understood math

after the racetrack.

When I turned 16,

my parents said
if I got good grades

they would get me
any car I wanted,

so I did really study
that semester

and I got good grades.

Probably all "A's" and "B's."

And as soon as they got me
a car, I just forged

every report card
from then on.

- You're a good trickster.

- Stupid.

I hope that I wasn't dreaming,

but Rosemary, who's this
very nice German woman,

happens to own this, uh,

I guess a swap meet
or whatever.

A junkyard, who knows.

I told if she ever gets
anything horse,

like life-size horse stuff,
to call me because...

I want a stud.
[laughs]

- [over PA]
Uh, Heidi.

Hooray.

We're happy to have you here
in Pahrump.

- Hey.
- Hey, how's it going?

- I've always wanted
to meet you.

- All the pretty girls
like horses.

If you ever see anybody
riding a horse it's--

nine out of ten, it's a girl.

- I don't know if that's
kind of what I wanted, though.

No, I wanted
a cement sculpture.

So she did call me
this morning,

I didn't imagine it.

But these are the things
I did buy over here.

How do you feel about
the thing that I'm doing?

Would you be against it
or for it?

- For it.
- You would?

- Sure.
- Thank you, Jesus.

- [laughing]
I'm a real estate broker,

so I appreciate
good architecture.

- Are you opposed
to the thing--

- No, I'm not.
I am pro for it.

- Thank you.
- Yeah.

- Oh.
- What's your name?

- Uh, Mel.
Matthew.

- Nice to meet you, Mel.

- You know,
it's the wild west here.

And, uh, it's the land
of opportunity.

That's America.

- [over PA]
Go get it, girl.

- Expecting company?

- Not for dinner.

- Oh, God.

No, I drove the whole
Rocky Road with, uh--

- I'm gonna
show you everything.

This is my little notebook here
of Nevada, you see?

My little Nevada thing.
- Right.

How is it you bought
this property

the rest of us have been
trying to obtain

when they say it's--
you can't have it?

- Well, this is what happened.

I--this is how I did it:
I hired--

- You don't have someone with
the tax assessor's office or--

- I wish.
No one helped me.

- But you paid
under the table...

- No.
- To get the property.

- No.
Lookit here.

Here's the receipt
on everything that I paid.

Here, every single one.

There's no "under table"
or anything, or...

Look at this.

None of this was easy,
I'm telling you.

- 'Cause the rest
is gonna be harder.

- Why?

Because you're against it
so much?

- Heidi, I don't think
it's going to be for women.

There is no way
women are gonna drive

this far out to get poked.

- But what--what if--
- There's no way.

- Okay, you could be right.

- If you came in here
and you told me

that you were gonna do women,
I have no problem with that.

You make your money
off of men.

- But it's my game
to lose, you know?

- Something--something else
that I don't like?

- Mm?
- Is, Heidi, you're talking

to me, but your eyes are going
all directions.

I'm not stupid, Heidi.
- 'Cause you're making--

- You're like the age
of one of my kids.

- Okay, I'm submissive
to you right now,

and I'm doing everything I can

to acquiesce to you,
is what I'm doing.

I'm begging you to give me
a chance for something.

My eyes are all over the place
'cause I'm not used

to begging someone
and being submissive.

- See, the whole thing
baffles me.

It just totally baffles me.

And--and it's--
it's for gay men.

- No.

- Heidi, you make your money
off of men.

You're not gonna make money
off of women.

Heaven forbid, you give
a woman $250.

She can't pass a Walmart.

If there was so much money
in women,

why didn't Dennis Hof or, uh--

look at--look at Joe Conforte.

He tried men.

It didn't work.

- They didn't have Viagra then.

They don't know
what they're doing.

I know what I'm doing.

- How could you know
what you're doing?

You only worked with women.

How do you know you can work
with a bunch of men?

- I know I can.

- If you went and shorted
a man's paycheck,

they'll kick your ass!

- You think I would ever--
I have never stiffed

even a bookmaker, okay?

Even as a criminal,
I paid taxes.

It wasn't the right amount,

but what criminal even tries
to pay taxes?

You're predicting that I'm just
going belly-up no matter what.

- And if you get
your building done,

you can walk right in here
and shake hands and say,

"Kathy, I did it."

And I'll shake your hand
and say, "Yes, Heidi.

Good girl.
Good job, Heidi."

- But I don't need that.

I don't need a--you know.

- Everyone needs that, Heidi.

- No, I don't.
- Yes, you do.

All of us do.

Especially in this day and age.

It's a man's world, Heidi.

And if you can get it done,
more power--power to you.

Because there's no women
in, uh, the brothel business.

It's all men.

It's a man's world.

- Thank you.
- Uh-huh.

You have a good night,

'cause you've got
a long road to home.

'Cause there's a lot of things

you're gonna have
to get changed.

Even in the brothel laws
and the water rights.

And--and to have
these people stop and try

to pick up my own voice,
I just cannot stand it.

There's no guarantee.

Then run the sucker
out of business.

He's sleazy.

- If all goes as planned,
Fleiss will be

playing madam once again
by Christmas.

- Fleiss says if everything
goes as planned,

"Heidi's Stud Farm,"
as she calls it,

will open by Valentine's Day.

- Unfortunately, I've been
set back a year

on the stud farm,

but I have all my ducks
in line and my application

is about ready
to be turned in.

And look, if I am turned down,
I'll address the problem

of why I'm turned down
and I will fix it

so I will satisfy it
so I'm not turned down,

because I do qualify.

He-hello?

- Heidi?
- Yes.

Okay, it's 1-7-1...

- Hey, can you hold on
one second?

Hello?

- I will not bash
Heidi Fleiss as a woman,

and maybe that's what I've been
doing for 40 minutes.

- Comma "Inc."

- "Inc."
- Yeah, "I-N-C."

- Okay, this is good enough
for me to just get Glen

on the water rights,
and I'll call you later.

Okay, bye.
- Take care.

- But from the perspective

of the legal industry
and the state...

she brings nothing
to the table,

except a lot of unknowns,

and a lot of conversation,

and a lot of planning that,

for all practical purposes,
we know will not fly

and will not add
to our legitimacy

and our total acceptance

by the people that control us,
let alone society.

Marianne, it's Heidi.

- Come on in.
- Okay.

How are you?

Hello.
- Heidi, he's beautiful.

- Yeah.

- But he likes to masturbate.

- Does that mean
he needs to breed?

- Well, you gotta find a--
a mate first.

- Do you have a girl of that?
What kind is it?

- No, that's a--a Derbyan.

And they're rare.

- These are baby cockatoos?

- "Tiels."
- Cockatiels?

- Yeah, they're
just now weaned.

- These are more common?

- One of my favorite birds.

- I would like
to have a child.

I'm 40, maybe about 44,

but I, you know,
I don't need to--

I don't want to be
one of these--

"What did you do in school?
Why'd you do this?

Did you meet the--"

I'm--I'm not gonna be one
of these type of people.

Hey, Prince.
- Yeah.

- Every parent,
when they have a child,

you want only the best
for your child,

and it have a good life
and good things happen,

but that's unrealistic because
bad things happen in life.

Hello, my children.

- Are you--you gonna do it?

- I need to know who had
a criminal past

for my licensing.

- Oy, vey.

Um...

Let me look at one
of the first people out here.

He's 80 years old.

- Will he talk to me?

- I'm sure he will.

- I want that license.

I want it now.

- I know.

- Look at Taco--
lookit, Taco Bell wants you

to come back, Marianne.

- That's not it.

Okay, now I've gotta do it
all over again.

- That's all right,
take a day.

- You know what?
Wait a minute.

I can help you if you--

as long as you've got
a little time.

When I start feeling better.

- Life goes by so quickly.

It seems like yesterday
you looked in the mirror

and you were 17.

There was time in my life,
you know, where I would jog

over eight miles a day

and drugs weren't a part
of my life.

And kind of drugs--

like anything
it starts out small

and then it becomes big.

I love that white-trash drug
crystal methane,

and I call it "poison"
'cause that's what it is.

You can tell when someone
does drugs.

They just have that look.
People know.

And, um, I don't want
to be that person.

I don't want
to have that look.

A stack of bills here.

There's, uh, registered
eviction letters

that are probably
super important.

It looks like a hundred
different bank things.

Looks very important,

and I haven't addressed
one thing, so--

- Why not?

- Because I'm too busy.

I think the first time
I did crystal meth I hated it,

and I said, "Damn it, I'm gonna
do this till I like it."

Naturally, people say,
"It must make you feel good

at some point or you wouldn't
be doing it."

Maybe, but I don't think so
because...

I really do hate myself
if I do do it,

and I--it's like having
a dirty little secret.

Every bathroom is gonna be
different rocks.

Some bathrooms will be, like,
the rose quartz,

some will be all
of smaller rocks.

Some will be of big rocks.

And they look like just,
you know, regular old--

like it's just some dumb rock.

Well, it's not a dumb rock.

It's a beautiful rock.

If you have one bathroom that's
all these rocks like that,

that's a really
beautiful bathroom.

The...

can you get the idea
a little bit?

I know it sounds like
I'm crazy

and just a raving lunatic,
but it'll all make sense

once it all comes together.

These are my beautiful rocks.

Yeah, these are the type
of rocks later

you're gonna be getting.

- Those look cool.
- I'll show you.

- You and I are doing this?
- You and I are doing it.

I don't even have my purse.
- Do you wanna go get it?

- Got it, Michael?
- Where'd you put it?

Where's--
- In the corner right there.

You see it?
- Yep.

- All right.
- Here.

Did you like that plant
I put in here for you, or no?

The small one?
- I hope it lives.

- It will.
I didn't ruin anything.

- Okay.

Michael, don't fucking lie!

I got everyone
fucking with me!

You think I want
to be fucked with

over a flashlight?

- I'm not here
to fuck with you!

- Then why are you lying
over stupid fucking shit?

You don't have to lie to me.
You could have just said,

"Yeah, I took this out
of the brothel."

That's all it would take.

But you chose to lie.

- No, I did not!

- [scoffs]
You're lying now!

What are you--
- [stammering]

You're yelling at me!

Please don't yell at me!
- Tell the truth!

- All right, I took it out
of the Bronco!

- Well, I can't deal with it.

- I don't want to lie to you!
I don't!

- I went
to the penitentiary alone,

I did my time alone,
and I came out alone.

When I was in prison

my family came to visit me
a couple times.

I denied all visits
after that

because it was too hard
for me to visit even family,

because my world
was in that penitentiary.

- I never said you fucked
with anybody!

- You know, I don't need--

My world was that world,

and I had to pretend that
that was my world

and nothing else existed.

So I refused all visits
after them.

Go right there.

- Here's your flashlight.

- I ran my business alone
and...

I don't know how
someone could help me.

I really don't.

I spend 90% of my time alone,

but I like it,
and I think I'm used to it,

and I think it makes me
a stronger person.

Like I say "excuse the prison,
but it shows."

I was laying on my bunk bed
and I said, "Okay, Heidi."

"This is payback
for every mean thing

"you've said to someone,
or did to someone,

"or bullied someone.

"This is what you get,
and this is your payback,

so learn a lesson."

Whether it's true or not,
that's what I took out of it.

Some scumbags live forever,
but I basically believe

if you're a good person,
good things happen.

But right before I went
to the penitentiary,

I was watching TV and I see
this middle-aged waitress

wins the biggest jackpot ever.

And I--for a second I thought,
"Damn, why can't that be me?"

Then I get out
of the penitentiary

in a few months,
and I see on TV

that that same woman got
in a car accident

and is a quadriplegic.

And I didn't wish
I was her then.

In penitentiary
I met girls that had

to fuck their own fathers
and stuff like that, you know?

Everyone has a--a sad story
and a tale of woe.

If we all threw
our dirty laundry

in the middle of the room,

how quickly we would
grab our own.

[repeating]
Good evening, Pahrump.

all: I'm Tom Slaughter
for News 41.

Leading off tonight
is, of course, the story

that has been on the minds
of many people:

the Joe Richards case
that involves alleged bribery.

- One of Nevada's most
influential brothel barons,

Joe Richards, faces charges

of trying to bribe
a public official.

- With my luck,
I happen to move

into the middle of a--

a three-to-five-year
big FBI sting operation

in this community.

- FBI agents arrested
long-time bordello owner

Joe Richards.

Richards owns three
of Nye County's six

legal brothels.

- Heidi Fleiss came
to the state of Nevada

and made friends
with Joe Richards,

who's one the more
high-profile owners

in southern Nevada.

- You know, I was just leaving
my foot in the door,

and it's hard because
of the politics of this town.

The brothels, these pimps,
they've been here for years.

They don't--I'm a threat
to everyone for some reason.

- And Joe, who is a good guy,

announced that he was going
to work partners with her.

- Heidi Fleiss says she's ready
to play madam again.

Fleiss is calling
her business venture

with Richards a "stud farm."

- It seemed like
a pretty good deal,

but he said not till February.

And I said to him, "Look,
you don't understand.

"I have anxiety.
I gotta work.

"I stared at a roof
on my bunk bed for three years.

I have to work.

Listen, Joe, Joe.

I'm getting ready to turn in
my application.

I'd better get
fucking approved, Joe,

because I know--
you forget a lot of things

that you say, Joe.

I don't give a fuck why.

The arrest has nothing
to do with it.

I'm not gonna d-denied
because of arrest

and you know that, too,

because they've licensed
plenty of felons.

Jesus Christ, whose side
are you on, Joe?

Whose side are you on?

- Fleiss parted ways with him,
and now she says

she's gonna do it
all by herself.

- I don't think it took
Mr. Richards two weeks

to come to the conclusion

that he'd probably made
a huge mistake.

- Can you help us understand
who Joe Richards is?

- Um...

On camera, no, I can't.
[laughs]

There--there's things
I can say, but I--I can, uh--

for educational purposes

I can address some more
with you later.

- It's like
"The Dukes of Hazzard"

and Joe Richards
is Boss Hogg.

He has lawyers on--
on retainer,

and he has cost Nye County
a lot of money taking them.

If he doesn't get
what he wants,

he'll--he's gonna sue.

We have one sleazy
brothel owner here.

We don't need two
that's gonna sue us.

- The reason why I did carry on
a relationship with him

is because, believe it or not,
he eats health foods.

And I was raised
a strict vegetarian.

Been a vegetarian
my whole life.

- If convicted,
Joe Richards faces

up to 20 years in prison
and a $250,000 fine.

- The federal investigation
quickly became the talk

of Pahrump and Las Vegas.

Long-time Commissioner
said that bribery

is nothing new
to Joe Richards.

- This is going to open up
a can of worms,

and let's just say there is
a whole lot of people

not sleeping real well
at night right now.

And I gotta tell you,
I love it.

- No, that's for you.
- Oh, really?

You're so sweet.
- Aren't you a vegetarian?

- Sure am.

I've never been attached
to a person,

to cars, to jewelry,
to a house, to anything.

Up-up.
Up-up.

Good.

Good baby.

That's my baby.

But one day I walked by
a bird's cage,

and it--it licked my fingers
and went, "Water."

And it was a scarlet macaw
named Dalton,

so I fell in love with Dalton.

He scared Pickles away.
- Okay.

- It's okay, baby.

- Now just walk in there like
a normal person, Heidi.

I know that's gonna
be difficult, but...

- I was like, "Marianne,
you know that bird

around the corner?"

And I don't think
she liked it very much.

She was like,
"Oh, yeah, Dalton."

I said,
"Well, I kind of like him."

And then--so I started, like,
giving her money,

and I would just say
it was for Dalton.

Give me a kiss.

Give me a kiss.

- You behave.
No, you behave.

- Didn't I tell you
it was a different Heidi

with this bird?

There's something...

- That's okay.

- Okay, I think that we should
put you in your bed and rest.

- Put him in fast, Heidi.

- Okay.
Good baby.

No, no, no.
- Put him in fast.

Heidi--good girl.

- I love you.

I love you, baby.

- Did you ever think you'd see
Heidi like that?

- I love you, baby.
- Nothing like a new mother.

- I'm coming back.
All is well.

- Okay.
- Come on.

- I know, wait a minute.

- Don't do that,
you're scaring me.

- Wait a minute, wait a minute.
- Okay.

- Okay, go away.

Go away.

Open the door for me.

Up-up there.

- Tell her to lay down.

Marianne?

- She died with the only thing
that she loved:

her birds and her bird books.

She died completely destitute.

They ended up helicoptering her
to Las Vegas,

and right when they're
taking her--

you know, she's got a IV in
and blood--

and she says, "Heidi.

You take care of my birds."

I'm like, "What?"

And I'm, you know...
[stammering]

I was scheduled to leave
to Los Angeles that night,

and she said, "You.

You take care of my birds."

And they took her away
and she died

a day-and-a-half later.

So I did the best I could

to respect
a dead lady's wishes.

Look, I came out here
to build a fucking brothel,

not to be emotionally involved
with an older woman.

To take on the birds
and all this other stuff

that is really beyond
my, uh, area of expertise.

Way beyond me.

My perverted Dalton sleeping
in my bedroom with me.

And, like, you know,
they're all beautiful

and lovely birds.

I'm not gonna--
but I'm not a--

I don't have pets for a reason.

'Cause I don't need
to be crying over birds

or be emotionally attached.

Come here, Dalton.

Come on.

Come on, Dalton.

[bird speaking]
You're a pretty girl.

- Come on, Dalton.

Come on, Dalton.

Usually Taco
wakes me up screaming

or Dalton might throw
something at me.

Well...

I figure a down pillow,

it's the most I can do
to the egg.

It's a blue and golden macaw.

I have no idea
if it's fertile or not.

But it's a 26-day
incubation period,

so then I'll find out.

God, this is draining me.
All of it.

Hi, my love.

- Once again, brothel owner
Joe Richards is in the news

as our top story this evening

as his legal situation
continues to crumble.

- She seems to have
this uncanny ability

to tap into controversy...

Without even trying.

You know, given that it comes
from Heidi,

it's always kind of fun,
you know?

She always makes it
sort of interesting

and--and fun.

Gives you--gives you something
not so serious,

uh, and deadly to talk about.

No, we're in touch with her
every few days.

- There she is!

- Hit eight, please.

I would say we just
generally advise her

on matters that, uh, come up.

Uh, we're confident
that there won't be

any other criminal matters.

Well, we just solved, uh...
- Yeah.

- Most of the problems
of the world, actually.

- The Middle East?
- Middle East.

- Iran is now friendly.

- We threw in North Korea,
since we were at it.

- The stud farm is delayed

because of the
federal investigation

in that town involving
political corruption.

And following the advice
of my criminal attorneys--

which I will no matter what--
said do not do anything

because I am a witness
in this case.

And that's the delay
of the stud farm.

It has to do
with nothing else.

Are we gonna build, like,
a extra wall here?

We still need
to break the wind a little.

- It's cold, man.

Look at the snow
on the mountains out here.

I'm gonna try to incorporate
some of that glass right here.

- Okay.
I have a lot more too.

- Yeah.

I think that from the back
of the house

to right here--I mean,
that's a good-sized

10-foot-tall aviary
for a bird.

That's pretty nice.
- Okay.

- And it's manageable,
you know?

And that's what you want,
is you want--

you want manageability,
I think.

- Marianne--hey, look,
I had a lot of fun

with the old lady.

- Yeah.

- I'm nesting a egg.
Come on.

I, like, cried, like,
for three days straight

over the whole thing.

- Plus, you know,
that feeling of--

okay, I had the flu--
that cough and that flu.

I'm like, "Oh, I probably
killed her with my germs."

But...

- All right.
- Did it come up?

- Yeah.

- Uh-oh.

- They won't scan?

- She got it.
She solved it.

- Oh-ho-ho-ho.

I love you, Dalton.

Don't be mad at me.
I love you.

Don't be mad, I love you.

Dalton is a former show bird
at the Tropicana Hotel,

and his flight feathers
were permanently removed.

And they used
to electric shock him

to do tricks.

Hey, handsome.

How are you, Taco?

Taco has been abused...
[unintelligible]

No, don't hurt her.

She's just saying hello.

Taco is a terribly abused
Buffon's macaw.

They're extinct in the wild.

He was raised in an aquarium
and beaten with a stick.

He's flat-footed.

I do the right thing for them.

I will get them all mates
and let them be birds.

They're not gonna be
domesticated pets.

They're gonna be real birds.

I hear you, Dalton.

That's a good boy, Taco.

What's wrong with you, Dalton?

You can't have this old shit.

No old food for Dalton.

No old food for you, Dalton.

You don't like that?

You like your food?

Nobody's gonna hurt you.

He's so scared.

You see him shaking?

- This glass is gonna bust
like this, man.

- One...

two...three.

Up.
[grunts]

- [grunts]
Good enough.

- Feel the power.

[bird speaking]
Hello, my love.

- The double
yellow-headed Amazon,

I do love it,

but I don't bond to it
like the other ones.

I would give it to my mother
because it says,

"Hello, my love," in, like,
a snobby English accent.

And then she'll go,
"Motherfucker."

[bird speaking]
What the fuck?

- The marquee, is this gonna be
high up like this?

- Yeah.
- Fuck yeah.

- But not too high, so you
can't catch 'em.

- Yeah. Love it.

- I mean, that's pretty
fuckin' high right there.

This is, like, all good,
free space for the birds.

- Good, 'cause then they can
fly a little bit.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- That's the intention.
- Yeah. Awesome. I love it.

Beautiful.
- There's room to grow,

if you want.

- No, we always wanna grow.

I like that.

If I could do things
all over again,

I think that I would've eased
my way out of prostitution

into another business.

When I was arrested,
it was right when, you know--

"Bring down that wall!"

And I was in the middle
of doing

an import/export deal.

In Germany,
they needed things,

so I was using some of my
connections in Mexico,

the government there, to do--

bring those huge shipping
cargo containers

with cigarettes and,
I don't know, it was like

a billion-dollar deal,

and even if I just got,
you know, 2% of it,

it would've just changed
the course of my life, but hey,

it didn't happen that way,
and that's it.

That's all.

I'm not a religious person.

But I do feel that I carry
the soul of someone

who was exterminated in
a concentration camp.

So.

- Are you gonna be sober?

- Well, I'm sober right now.

So, I'm okay.

But if I do drugs,
I will ruin my life.

I will, um, not be able to care
for the birds that I love.

I will not be able to have
a stud farm.

I will not be able
to have any business.

I will be dysfunctional, and
I won't accomplish anything.

Let's go score some heroin.
Let's try something new.

Come on.

Okay, we're done?
- Yeah, I think so.

- That was good, right?
- Are those your tits?

- No, they're fake.
Of course, it's Hollywood.

I have fake lips,
I have fake tits,

and I had my ears done.

And my eyelids.

When you're 27, and you're
looking at seven years

in a federal penitentiary,
that's a life sentence.

You know, especially when
you're traveling

in the circle I was traveling,
and...

- What'd you look like before?
- A monster.

- No, no, no, no! No, no.

No.

Pa-pa, pa-pa-pa, hi, Paul.

Paul's got a great disposition.

And I found Gina!

Gina, Gina, Gina.
Gina, whoo-hoo!

Gina. And she came from a
trailer park in San Bernardino.

Barbara was crying--

that was the woman who
owned it--

was crying, crying, crying
because I'm now Barbara.

She calls me Barbara.

- Ow!
- Whoo! Ow, ow.

Barbara loves you, my friend.

Barbara loves you.
Whoo, whoo!

Ah-buh-buh-buh-buh.

And I just took her--
I didn't know enough,

but I just put her right
with Dal,

and he beat the fuck of her
the first time.

The second and the third time,
Gina was--

Gina put him right, you know--
she said, "I can handle this."

Hey! Whoo!

Whoo! Whoo!

Whoo!

Okay.

Whoo!

Come on, hop up.
Whoo, whoo!

Gin--hey! No, Gina!

- [squawking]
- No.

- Hello.

Hello.

- Dalton...

He's special, he's different,
in a...

When I would take a shower,
my hair was all wet,

and I would get out, and he
would comb it with his beak.

It feels so good, I said,
"Ooh, Dal. Dally."

You know, he died.
He died all of a sudden.

He died...
- [squawks]

- He just died, and...

- Every morning,
Gina and him

used to have to
come to my bedroom

because--or else I
couldn't sleep.

So every morning, they would
play in my bed

while I would sleep.

Later on, he threw up a little
bit during the day.

And then...

you know, I thought he had
food poisoning.

So fuckin' stupid and arrogant

to try and self-diagnose
a problem, you know.

I rushed him to the hospital,
the emergency room,

and they put him in, like,
a life-support bubble

on oxygen.

And, uh...

I had to sign papers for him
to be put down.

And he died
with a tear in his eye.

[sniffles] He did.

His eyes were shut.

And he had a tear--
tear running down his eye.

And the one thing
he taught me was,

you gotta look someone
in the eye.

Look 'em in the eye, because

he insisted I always
look him in the eye.

Naturally, I had to have
a autopsy to--

autopsy to make sure that the--
everyone else was okay.

He had a really rare terminal
illness where his liver--

he couldn't digest the iron.

And... I didn't know it,
though.

He made my house feel complete

and legit.

Sure, I love all these birds.

But I loved him differently.
I loved him like a person.

He just...

his soul was of a human.

It just--I'll see him one day.

I'm gonna see him again
one day.

[sniffling] And...

Hi, Gin-Gin.
You're my friend.

Are you my friend?

Barbara loves you, Ginny.

Barbara loves you, Ginny-Gin.
Barbara loves you.

You're a movie star.
You're a movie star.

Like I said,
I'm not gonna fall apart.

I'm gonna finish my business.

I'm gonna build a house.

For them and myself.

And we're gonna be a family.
'Cause you'll miss me, Ginny.

'Cause you're gonna outlive me,
Gin-Gin.

You're gonna outlive me,
Ginny-Gin-Gin.

You're gonna outlive me,
Ginny.

You're gonna outlive me,
Ginny-Gin-Gin.

You're gonna outlive me,
Ginny.

Hello! Hello, mister!

Hello, hello, hello!

You!

You, you, you!

I'm talkin' to you!

Hey, you! Come here!

You're sexy!

You're better-looking than
any man I've ever been with!

That's how sexy you are!

You can't take
a compliment!

He wouldn't have
any part of me.

'Cause you're a lesbian!