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1
00:00:01,235 --> 00:00:02,800
MAN: Here we go...
HELGA: Arnold!
2
00:00:02,835 --> 00:00:04,234
(CATS SCREECHING)
(DOGS BARKING)
3
00:00:05,370 --> 00:00:06,469
HELGA: Hey, Arnold.
4
00:00:12,072 --> 00:00:12,736
(LOUD CLATTER)
5
00:00:17,540 --> 00:00:18,373
(LOUD SHRIEK)
6
00:00:18,408 --> 00:00:19,606
HELGA: Hey, Arnold!
7
00:00:22,309 --> 00:00:23,341
Arnold?
8
00:00:25,076 --> 00:00:26,075
Arnold!
9
00:00:26,111 --> 00:00:27,142
(SIREN WAILING)
10
00:00:27,177 --> 00:00:28,142
Arnold!
11
00:00:37,148 --> 00:00:39,046
Arnold.
12
00:00:40,681 --> 00:00:42,247
Move it,
football head!
13
00:00:42,282 --> 00:00:43,447
ALL: Hey, Arnold!
14
00:00:59,355 --> 00:01:01,686
Boy, that movie
really sucked wind.
15
00:01:01,721 --> 00:01:04,255
Yeah, who played
the onion anyway?
16
00:01:04,290 --> 00:01:06,522
Didn't believe his performance
for a second.
17
00:01:06,557 --> 00:01:08,689
Plus, it was two hours long.
18
00:01:08,724 --> 00:01:11,089
Two hours too long
if you ask me.
19
00:01:11,125 --> 00:01:13,258
GERALD: Can't believe
we paid money for that.
20
00:01:14,393 --> 00:01:15,625
Uh-oh.
21
00:01:17,227 --> 00:01:19,460
Hey, what happened to the sun?
22
00:01:19,495 --> 00:01:21,060
It went down.
23
00:01:21,095 --> 00:01:24,162
Aw, man. I told my mom
I would be home before dark.
24
00:01:24,197 --> 00:01:25,295
She's going to kill me.
25
00:01:25,330 --> 00:01:27,062
We've got time.
The street lights
aren't on yet.
26
00:01:32,633 --> 00:01:34,565
Now what are we going to do.
27
00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:36,232
We could take
the crosstown bus.
28
00:01:36,268 --> 00:01:37,633
You mean that one?
29
00:01:40,902 --> 00:01:43,100
Well, we could walk.
30
00:01:43,136 --> 00:01:45,435
Walk?
It'll take days!
31
00:01:45,471 --> 00:01:46,769
We'll freeze to death!
32
00:01:46,804 --> 00:01:49,537
We'll be eaten by pigeons,
or worse...
33
00:01:49,572 --> 00:01:51,103
Eaten by rats!
34
00:01:51,839 --> 00:01:53,472
I hate rats!
35
00:01:53,507 --> 00:01:55,539
We could pool our money
and take a cab.
36
00:01:55,574 --> 00:01:57,839
Do you know how much
a cab would cost?
37
00:01:57,875 --> 00:02:01,307
It would cost approximately
$34 and 20 cents.
Without the tip.
38
00:02:01,342 --> 00:02:03,941
I have 82 cents
and some string.
39
00:02:03,977 --> 00:02:05,309
(ALL GROANING)
40
00:02:05,344 --> 00:02:06,809
Okay, let's not panic.
41
00:02:06,844 --> 00:02:09,843
I know how we can
get home before anybody
gets in trouble.
42
00:02:09,879 --> 00:02:12,044
Oh, no.
Don't say it, Arnold.
43
00:02:12,079 --> 00:02:13,445
Don't even think it.
44
00:02:13,481 --> 00:02:15,312
We take the subway.
45
00:02:15,347 --> 00:02:16,745
(ALL GASP)
46
00:02:16,781 --> 00:02:19,980
Arnold, you know what they say
about taking the subway
after dark.
47
00:02:20,015 --> 00:02:22,615
"Sun goes down,
stay above ground."
48
00:02:22,651 --> 00:02:24,815
I ain't scared of no subway.
49
00:02:24,850 --> 00:02:26,449
I ain't scared of nothing.
50
00:02:26,485 --> 00:02:28,450
Nope. No subway for me.
51
00:02:28,486 --> 00:02:30,450
Not no way.
Not no how.
52
00:02:30,486 --> 00:02:32,285
I am not taking the subway.
53
00:02:33,654 --> 00:02:36,053
I can't believe
I'm taking the subway.
54
00:02:36,088 --> 00:02:37,654
We're taking
the subway, Grandma.
55
00:02:37,689 --> 00:02:40,321
Yeah, the Eastbound D Train.
We'll be home in half an hour.
56
00:02:40,356 --> 00:02:41,988
Come on, Arnold,
it's coming.
57
00:02:44,457 --> 00:02:46,256
Are you sure,
this is the right one, Gerald?
58
00:02:46,292 --> 00:02:48,658
Yep. We take the D
to Union Park.
59
00:02:48,693 --> 00:02:51,325
And then the C three stops
until 41st Avenue.
60
00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:53,193
And then switch over
to the One.
61
00:02:53,228 --> 00:02:54,793
Or does that say seven?
62
00:02:54,828 --> 00:02:57,227
Oh, no! We should
really be on the F!
63
00:02:57,663 --> 00:02:58,894
(ALL GRUMBLING)
64
00:02:58,929 --> 00:03:00,595
Nice going, Geraldo.
65
00:03:00,630 --> 00:03:01,761
Oh, that's okay.
66
00:03:01,797 --> 00:03:04,329
We can get off
at the Waterloo station
and transfer to F.
67
00:03:07,732 --> 00:03:09,331
(CREAKING)
68
00:03:09,366 --> 00:03:11,698
Hey, look.
I'm a monkey.
69
00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:12,865
(LAUGHING)
70
00:03:15,168 --> 00:03:17,634
See? I told you
this wouldn't be so bad.
71
00:03:17,670 --> 00:03:19,334
Well, that guy
seems comfortable.
72
00:03:19,369 --> 00:03:20,602
(SNORING)
73
00:03:26,971 --> 00:03:29,371
What a sweet little girl.
74
00:03:30,507 --> 00:03:33,172
MAN: You see
how easy this is, Hillary?
75
00:03:33,208 --> 00:03:35,840
Only by confronting
your claustrophobia,
76
00:03:35,875 --> 00:03:38,241
will you be able
to overcome it.
77
00:03:38,276 --> 00:03:39,874
Now say your mantra.
78
00:03:39,910 --> 00:03:41,041
Yes, doctor.
79
00:03:41,777 --> 00:03:43,710
Big, open spaces.
80
00:03:44,912 --> 00:03:46,744
Big, open spaces.
81
00:03:47,246 --> 00:03:48,312
Good, Hillary.
82
00:03:49,113 --> 00:03:51,346
Don't forget to breathe.
83
00:03:51,381 --> 00:03:54,046
Look, I'm
an upside down fireman.
84
00:03:54,082 --> 00:03:55,780
Get off that pole,
fat boy.
85
00:03:55,816 --> 00:03:58,181
That's for holding on
not climbing on!
86
00:03:58,217 --> 00:04:00,682
Hey, how did you know
I was climbing?
87
00:04:00,717 --> 00:04:03,650
When the eyes went,
the other senses got stronger.
88
00:04:03,685 --> 00:04:04,883
Speaking of which...
89
00:04:04,919 --> 00:04:06,117
(SNIFFS)
90
00:04:06,152 --> 00:04:07,518
(GRUNTS) Sweet sister Sadie.
91
00:04:07,553 --> 00:04:09,752
When was the last time
you took a bath?
92
00:04:09,786 --> 00:04:11,385
(TRAIN HORN BLOWING)
93
00:04:13,255 --> 00:04:15,354
Well, football head,
you were right.
94
00:04:15,389 --> 00:04:17,355
The subway
was a good idea after all.
95
00:04:17,390 --> 00:04:19,488
Told you.
We're going to get home
in no time.
96
00:04:19,524 --> 00:04:21,323
Everything will be just fine.
97
00:04:23,226 --> 00:04:24,557
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
98
00:04:28,827 --> 00:04:29,492
(SQUEALING)
99
00:04:29,993 --> 00:04:31,359
(ALL SCREAMING)
100
00:04:32,728 --> 00:04:33,960
(ALL GROANING)
101
00:04:33,995 --> 00:04:35,528
Hey, the train stopped.
102
00:04:35,563 --> 00:04:37,328
No kidding, Einstein.
103
00:04:37,363 --> 00:04:39,995
Hey, hey.
What are you doing
in my house?
104
00:04:40,298 --> 00:04:41,530
Go away!
105
00:04:41,565 --> 00:04:43,697
CONDUCTOR:
Ladies and gentlemen,
please remain calm.
106
00:04:43,732 --> 00:04:45,431
There is no need to worry.
107
00:04:45,466 --> 00:04:49,499
But, of course.
The main thing, uh,
is to stay calm.
108
00:04:49,535 --> 00:04:52,966
CONDUCTOR: Even though
thousands of pounds of water
are bearing down as we speak
109
00:04:53,001 --> 00:04:55,635
on the thin aging walls
of this government-funded
tunnel,
110
00:04:55,669 --> 00:04:57,635
you are in no danger.
111
00:04:57,670 --> 00:05:01,537
Actually, millions of
pounds of water bearing down
on the tunnel is more correct.
112
00:05:01,572 --> 00:05:05,304
CONDUCTOR: Actually,
this has never happened
to me before! (SOBS)
113
00:05:05,340 --> 00:05:06,438
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
114
00:05:06,940 --> 00:05:08,038
That's it!
115
00:05:08,073 --> 00:05:10,940
We're busting open that door
and walking out of here!
116
00:05:10,974 --> 00:05:12,840
I don't think that's such
a good idea, Helga.
117
00:05:12,875 --> 00:05:13,941
There might be...
118
00:05:15,477 --> 00:05:16,408
(SQUEAKING)
119
00:05:16,977 --> 00:05:18,309
Rats!
120
00:05:25,947 --> 00:05:28,246
ANNOUNCER:
We interrupt this program
with a special bulletin.
121
00:05:28,281 --> 00:05:30,614
The eastbound D train
is stuck in a tunnel
under the river
122
00:05:30,649 --> 00:05:33,814
with at least a dozen people
trapped onboard
and communication impossible.
123
00:05:33,850 --> 00:05:34,948
More at 11.
124
00:05:34,983 --> 00:05:38,283
I'm the only ex-cop
in this city
125
00:05:38,318 --> 00:05:42,016
crazy enough to take on
a job like this.
126
00:05:42,052 --> 00:05:43,884
(THRILLING INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING)
127
00:05:45,186 --> 00:05:46,318
(OBJECTS RATTLING)
128
00:05:53,624 --> 00:05:55,021
Goin' out, Pookie?
129
00:05:55,057 --> 00:05:56,723
Don't wait up.
130
00:05:56,758 --> 00:05:59,290
All righty, I'll save you
some supper.
131
00:06:00,959 --> 00:06:02,424
(SIRENS WAILING)
132
00:06:02,460 --> 00:06:04,024
(INDISTINCT
POLICE RADIO CHATTER)
133
00:06:09,094 --> 00:06:10,193
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
134
00:06:22,634 --> 00:06:23,998
(HAROLD PANICKING)
135
00:06:25,701 --> 00:06:28,066
Air getting thinner!
136
00:06:28,101 --> 00:06:29,233
Hard to breathe.
137
00:06:29,269 --> 00:06:31,968
Well, then stop sucking up
all the good air, fat boy!
138
00:06:32,003 --> 00:06:35,935
Leave the kids alone.
They can suck up
all the air they want.
139
00:06:35,971 --> 00:06:37,503
It's my house.
140
00:06:37,538 --> 00:06:39,836
Go ahead, fat boy.
Breathe deep.
141
00:06:39,872 --> 00:06:43,538
Actually, it's impossible
for someone with even
Harold's lung capacity
142
00:06:43,574 --> 00:06:44,838
to deplete the air
in this car.
143
00:06:44,874 --> 00:06:47,339
CONDUCTOR: Passengers,
it may be a matter
of minutes or hours
144
00:06:47,375 --> 00:06:48,507
(PANICS)
or days or weeks
145
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:50,607
(CALMLY) 'til the search
and rescue team finds our
146
00:06:50,643 --> 00:06:52,675
(PANICS) forgotten
and stranded subway car.
147
00:06:52,710 --> 00:06:55,476
(CALMLY) And takes out
of this (PANICS)
increasing hopeless
148
00:06:55,511 --> 00:06:58,209
(CALMLY) situation,
so let's all remain calm,
there's no need to...
149
00:06:58,245 --> 00:07:00,511
(PANICS) Doomed!
We're all doomed! Why me?
150
00:07:00,546 --> 00:07:02,078
(SOBBING)
151
00:07:02,113 --> 00:07:03,879
We're all going
to starve to death
152
00:07:03,914 --> 00:07:05,546
and get eaten by rats!
153
00:07:07,282 --> 00:07:10,381
This is crazy.
We got to do
something, Gerald.
154
00:07:10,750 --> 00:07:12,181
Gerald?
155
00:07:12,216 --> 00:07:13,249
(TEETH CLATTERING)
156
00:07:13,285 --> 00:07:14,683
I got to have
something to eat.
157
00:07:14,718 --> 00:07:16,216
Anything. Anything.
158
00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:20,851
(SCREECHING)
159
00:07:20,887 --> 00:07:21,951
(HISSING)
160
00:07:21,987 --> 00:07:22,985
(RAT SQUEAKING)
161
00:07:26,955 --> 00:07:29,154
CONDUCTOR: Attention,
passengers, I have an update,
162
00:07:29,189 --> 00:07:30,655
we're doomed, we're trapped.
163
00:07:30,690 --> 00:07:33,055
I'm talking to you
from the fetal position.
164
00:07:33,091 --> 00:07:35,490
I'm scrunched up small,
rocking back and forth,
165
00:07:35,525 --> 00:07:37,990
trying to think
if there's any way out.
I don't think there is.
166
00:07:38,025 --> 00:07:40,857
(PANICKING) I really
don't think there is!
Do you think there is? No!
167
00:07:40,893 --> 00:07:42,759
Thank you for
riding the subway!
168
00:07:42,794 --> 00:07:44,359
Have a nice day!
169
00:07:44,895 --> 00:07:46,860
Big, open spaces.
170
00:07:47,763 --> 00:07:49,762
Big, open spaces.
171
00:07:50,563 --> 00:07:52,462
Big, open spaces.
172
00:07:53,130 --> 00:07:55,129
Big, open spaces.
173
00:07:55,766 --> 00:07:56,697
(CLEARS THROAT)
174
00:07:56,732 --> 00:07:58,298
HILLARY:
Big, open spaces.
175
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,231
Big, open spaces.
176
00:08:02,034 --> 00:08:03,799
Big, open spaces.
177
00:08:04,435 --> 00:08:06,434
Big, open spaces.
178
00:08:07,670 --> 00:08:09,901
Big, open spaces.
179
00:08:10,404 --> 00:08:12,636
Big, open spaces.
180
00:08:13,505 --> 00:08:15,737
Big, open spaces.
181
00:08:17,473 --> 00:08:20,005
Big, open spaces.
182
00:08:21,140 --> 00:08:23,173
(SOBBING) We're trapped!
183
00:08:23,208 --> 00:08:26,441
Trapped like rats. And
the tunnel's gonna collapse
And we're all doomed!
184
00:08:27,710 --> 00:08:30,275
Please, would you shut
your little friend up!
185
00:08:30,311 --> 00:08:32,677
She's making us
all crazy here!
186
00:08:32,712 --> 00:08:35,811
Think,
"Big, open spaces."
187
00:08:35,846 --> 00:08:38,945
Big, wide, open spaces.
188
00:08:38,979 --> 00:08:41,313
That mantra
doesn't do anything,
189
00:08:41,348 --> 00:08:42,646
you mental case.
190
00:08:42,682 --> 00:08:43,447
Oh.
191
00:08:43,482 --> 00:08:44,980
Get out of my house!
192
00:08:45,016 --> 00:08:48,315
Hey, smells like...
(SNIFFS) ...chocolate.
193
00:08:48,350 --> 00:08:49,215
ALL: Chocolate?
194
00:08:49,250 --> 00:08:50,349
Did someone say chocolate?
195
00:08:50,384 --> 00:08:51,982
Where? Where? Where?
196
00:08:52,419 --> 00:08:53,817
Uh... There!
197
00:08:55,052 --> 00:08:57,451
Hey, yeah.
Who's got the chocolate?
198
00:08:57,486 --> 00:08:59,452
You two-bit lowlife.
199
00:08:59,487 --> 00:09:02,186
We're all starving
and you're holding out on us!
200
00:09:04,623 --> 00:09:05,854
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
201
00:09:05,889 --> 00:09:07,221
(ALL CLAMORING)
202
00:09:10,124 --> 00:09:12,656
ARNOLD: Come on,
we're all just
getting hysterical.
203
00:09:12,692 --> 00:09:15,425
Let's just calm down,
try to hang in there
together.
204
00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:25,093
This is all your fault, Helga.
205
00:09:25,129 --> 00:09:28,228
If you hadn't been hanging
your fat mouth on that pole,
206
00:09:28,263 --> 00:09:29,729
we wouldn't have broken down.
207
00:09:29,764 --> 00:09:32,431
Oh, come on, Helga,
Harold didn't have anything
to do with it
208
00:09:32,466 --> 00:09:33,631
and you know it.
209
00:09:33,666 --> 00:09:37,398
Oh, yeah? What about you,
Mr. "Let's take the D train"?
210
00:09:37,434 --> 00:09:38,765
That was brilliant.
211
00:09:44,136 --> 00:09:45,267
(ALL CLAMORING)
212
00:09:46,470 --> 00:09:47,703
(WHIMPERING)
213
00:09:51,271 --> 00:09:52,304
(SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING)
214
00:09:53,773 --> 00:09:54,904
Hey.
215
00:09:55,773 --> 00:09:57,271
There's something wrong
with this dog.
216
00:09:57,307 --> 00:09:58,306
Is he sick?
217
00:09:58,342 --> 00:09:59,473
What is the matter?
218
00:09:59,508 --> 00:10:00,640
Somebody get me a newspaper.
219
00:10:01,275 --> 00:10:02,774
(DOG WHIMPERING)
220
00:10:02,810 --> 00:10:04,208
Here's a newspaper.
221
00:10:04,243 --> 00:10:06,075
I used to be a nurse.
222
00:10:06,110 --> 00:10:08,509
What is it? Is there
something wrong with Killer?
223
00:10:08,545 --> 00:10:09,543
Killer?
224
00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:14,812
Bingo!
225
00:10:14,847 --> 00:10:17,278
There. Come on,
come on, that's it.
226
00:10:17,314 --> 00:10:19,912
Almost. Come on.
Here we go.
227
00:10:19,948 --> 00:10:22,448
Killer! Killer!
Are you okay, boy?
228
00:10:22,483 --> 00:10:23,748
Killer's all right.
229
00:10:23,783 --> 00:10:25,949
But I think he's a she.
230
00:10:25,984 --> 00:10:28,583
You mean, I'm a daddy?
231
00:10:28,618 --> 00:10:29,516
(CHUCKLES)
232
00:10:32,152 --> 00:10:36,252
Aren't they precious!
Congratulations, dear.
233
00:10:42,523 --> 00:10:44,222
It's a miracle.
234
00:10:44,257 --> 00:10:46,389
We're saved!
235
00:10:46,424 --> 00:10:47,723
(ALL CHEERING)
236
00:10:50,859 --> 00:10:54,258
Wait a minute, everybody.
I got something to say.
237
00:10:54,293 --> 00:10:56,593
We know. We know.
238
00:10:56,627 --> 00:10:58,860
ALL: Get out of your house.
239
00:10:58,895 --> 00:11:00,828
No, no, not that.
240
00:11:00,863 --> 00:11:02,562
I got somethin' else to say.
241
00:11:03,831 --> 00:11:07,296
♪ Let's all hold hands
242
00:11:07,331 --> 00:11:10,897
♪ Here on the subway
243
00:11:10,932 --> 00:11:14,265
♪ 'Cause we've been
Stuck here in the dark
244
00:11:14,300 --> 00:11:17,099
♪ For way too long
245
00:11:18,268 --> 00:11:21,668
♪ Oh, it's hot
And it stinks
246
00:11:21,703 --> 00:11:25,102
♪ And the train
Is on the blink
247
00:11:25,137 --> 00:11:26,936
♪ They lock the doors
248
00:11:26,972 --> 00:11:28,571
♪ We've got no choice
249
00:11:28,606 --> 00:11:30,738
♪ Let's get along!
250
00:11:32,273 --> 00:11:35,639
♪ Let's all hold hands
251
00:11:35,675 --> 00:11:39,274
♪ Here on the subway
252
00:11:39,309 --> 00:11:42,675
♪ 'Cause we've been
Stuck here in the dark
253
00:11:42,710 --> 00:11:45,676
♪ For way too long ♪
254
00:12:00,150 --> 00:12:01,448
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
255
00:12:03,950 --> 00:12:06,184
You throw like a girl, man.
256
00:12:07,719 --> 00:12:10,652
Well, you throw like
a little shrimp with
stringy hair
257
00:12:10,687 --> 00:12:12,752
and big ears
and your hat on backwards.
258
00:12:12,788 --> 00:12:14,086
No, I don't.
259
00:12:14,121 --> 00:12:16,820
Gotta be a saltwater
taffy store somewhere
around this place.
260
00:12:19,990 --> 00:12:22,022
But soft. It's him!
261
00:12:22,691 --> 00:12:24,623
Oh, it is my love,
262
00:12:24,659 --> 00:12:27,457
spending a lost Saturday
on the river's edge.
263
00:12:27,493 --> 00:12:29,725
How I long to share
your reverie.
264
00:12:30,694 --> 00:12:32,959
And yet...
265
00:12:32,994 --> 00:12:37,195
And, yet I can't get
a ding blasting minute
alone with him.
266
00:12:37,230 --> 00:12:39,228
Look, it's the geek patrol.
267
00:12:39,263 --> 00:12:41,396
Drubbing for worms
no doubt.
268
00:12:41,431 --> 00:12:42,462
What are you looking at?
269
00:12:42,964 --> 00:12:43,862
Elk Island.
270
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:48,565
So?
271
00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:50,098
So, how come
no one ever goes there?
272
00:12:50,133 --> 00:12:52,733
Well, for one thing,
it's haunted.
273
00:12:52,768 --> 00:12:53,866
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
274
00:12:55,035 --> 00:12:56,934
Haunted? (SCOFFS)
What a crock.
275
00:12:56,969 --> 00:12:58,602
GERALD: It is not!
276
00:12:58,637 --> 00:13:00,069
Come on, Gerald,
you tell us.
277
00:13:00,104 --> 00:13:04,204
The haunted caves
of Wheezin' Ed.
278
00:13:04,239 --> 00:13:06,538
In the time
of Prohibition,
279
00:13:06,574 --> 00:13:08,838
on the island they called Elk,
280
00:13:08,873 --> 00:13:11,406
there lived a gangster,
so ruthless,
281
00:13:11,441 --> 00:13:14,473
that his name inspired terror
all up and down
282
00:13:14,509 --> 00:13:16,474
the Skookumchuck River.
283
00:13:16,510 --> 00:13:20,742
They called him Wheezin' Ed.
284
00:13:22,478 --> 00:13:23,743
(WHEEZING)
285
00:13:23,778 --> 00:13:26,412
GERALD: Ed got his name
from the wheezy noise
he made
286
00:13:26,447 --> 00:13:30,179
just before
he came up behind you
and wrung your neck.
287
00:13:30,215 --> 00:13:32,813
Some say, he wheezed
288
00:13:32,848 --> 00:13:35,215
'cause he suffered
from chronic head colds.
289
00:13:35,250 --> 00:13:37,948
Some say,
the wheezing was caused
290
00:13:37,983 --> 00:13:40,782
by a chicken bone
lodged in his throat.
291
00:13:40,818 --> 00:13:43,184
Some say,
he was just faking it.
292
00:13:43,220 --> 00:13:45,284
One thing's for sure,
293
00:13:45,320 --> 00:13:48,118
he buried his huge treasure
294
00:13:48,153 --> 00:13:51,286
in the damp dirt
of those caves.
295
00:13:52,489 --> 00:13:54,254
No one has ever found it,
296
00:13:54,289 --> 00:13:56,988
though, countless souls
have tried.
297
00:13:57,024 --> 00:13:59,323
And to come
to some awful end,
298
00:13:59,358 --> 00:14:01,823
too hideous to be spoken of.
299
00:14:01,858 --> 00:14:04,291
For to find the huge treasure
300
00:14:04,327 --> 00:14:07,259
one must descend
into the haunted caves
301
00:14:07,294 --> 00:14:09,792
of Wheezin' Ed.
302
00:14:10,829 --> 00:14:11,760
The end.
303
00:14:11,795 --> 00:14:13,160
Good job, Gerald.
304
00:14:13,196 --> 00:14:14,194
Thanks.
305
00:14:14,230 --> 00:14:17,395
What a crack.
That island isn't haunted.
306
00:14:17,431 --> 00:14:19,463
And there is no Wheezin' Ed.
307
00:14:19,498 --> 00:14:22,163
Argh!
But there'll be a treasure.
308
00:14:22,933 --> 00:14:24,432
Wow.
309
00:14:24,467 --> 00:14:27,898
He must be one of those
real life grizzled, old,
seesaw type characters.
310
00:14:27,934 --> 00:14:29,966
Nah. It's just Sheena's uncle,
Earl.
311
00:14:30,001 --> 00:14:33,268
Hey, Mister, what was that
you were saying about
the treasure?
312
00:14:33,303 --> 00:14:36,802
Har har har!
Here be a small sample.
313
00:14:36,838 --> 00:14:39,570
Found it in the caves
last Tuesday.
314
00:14:40,572 --> 00:14:41,704
Looks real to me.
315
00:14:42,573 --> 00:14:44,305
Could be
a 16th century doubloon.
316
00:14:44,341 --> 00:14:45,905
What are we waiting for?
317
00:14:45,941 --> 00:14:47,306
Let's get a shovel
and go, man.
318
00:14:47,342 --> 00:14:49,707
ALL: Yeah, come on.
Let's go!
319
00:14:49,742 --> 00:14:51,441
Wait a minute,
you morons.
320
00:14:51,476 --> 00:14:54,675
How do you plan
to get there? Swim?
321
00:14:54,711 --> 00:14:58,776
I'll give you all passage
to the island for
one dollar each.
322
00:14:58,811 --> 00:15:00,009
Two dollars for him.
323
00:15:02,113 --> 00:15:06,145
And I'll rent you me shovel
for an additional 50 cents.
324
00:15:06,180 --> 00:15:07,912
Five cents security deposit.
325
00:15:07,948 --> 00:15:09,213
What do you say, Arnold?
326
00:15:09,249 --> 00:15:10,647
Yeah, let's go!
327
00:15:16,218 --> 00:15:19,217
This counterfeit
penny operation
was a great idea.
328
00:15:19,253 --> 00:15:23,852
Yeah, and setting it up
on Elk island was a stroke
of pure genius.
329
00:15:23,887 --> 00:15:25,753
No one will ever come
snooping around here,
330
00:15:25,788 --> 00:15:27,686
thanks to that
Wheezin' Ed baloney.
331
00:15:27,722 --> 00:15:30,321
Yeah, Wheezin' Ed.
What a laugh.
332
00:15:30,357 --> 00:15:31,521
(CACKLES)
333
00:15:32,724 --> 00:15:35,422
I'll be back for ye
before the sun sets.
334
00:15:35,458 --> 00:15:36,789
We sail with the tide.
335
00:15:36,824 --> 00:15:38,724
ALL: Bye, see you later.
336
00:15:41,393 --> 00:15:43,559
Look, another doubloon.
337
00:15:43,594 --> 00:15:44,992
Ah, we're getting warmer.
338
00:15:45,027 --> 00:15:46,126
Hey, you guys.
339
00:15:46,161 --> 00:15:48,594
If there's buried treasure,
it's probably in there.
340
00:15:57,065 --> 00:15:59,265
Oh, let's go through
that tunnel.
341
00:15:59,300 --> 00:16:00,298
No, no, that one.
342
00:16:00,333 --> 00:16:03,566
Okay, okay...
All right, all right.
343
00:16:03,601 --> 00:16:05,866
Quiet!
344
00:16:05,901 --> 00:16:07,900
If we're going ahead
with this fiasco,
345
00:16:07,935 --> 00:16:10,301
let's at least be organized.
346
00:16:10,336 --> 00:16:12,402
We'll split up
into parties of two.
347
00:16:12,437 --> 00:16:14,403
Sid, you and Rhonda
take that tunnel.
348
00:16:14,438 --> 00:16:16,137
Why should I go with Rhonda?
349
00:16:16,172 --> 00:16:17,304
Why can't I go with Harold?
350
00:16:17,339 --> 00:16:20,705
Uh, 'cause I got
to guard the outside.
That's why.
351
00:16:20,741 --> 00:16:22,972
On account of,
I'm bravest.
352
00:16:24,174 --> 00:16:27,073
Girl.
Head on backwards
little twerp.
353
00:16:27,609 --> 00:16:28,507
Right.
354
00:16:28,542 --> 00:16:30,308
Phoebe, you go with...
355
00:16:31,577 --> 00:16:32,609
Gerald.
356
00:16:32,645 --> 00:16:33,909
BOTH: Huh?
357
00:16:35,178 --> 00:16:36,343
Okay.
358
00:16:36,379 --> 00:16:38,544
Well, since you're
guarding the entrance,
359
00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:41,145
I guess I'm stuck
with the football head.
360
00:16:41,180 --> 00:16:42,979
(SCOFFS) Suit yourself.
361
00:16:45,082 --> 00:16:47,080
Hey, what's with
the jelly beans?
362
00:16:47,115 --> 00:16:49,081
I'm leaving a trail
they can follow back.
363
00:16:50,550 --> 00:16:52,516
(SCOFFS)
Leaving a trail.
364
00:16:52,551 --> 00:16:54,750
Good plan, Einstein.
365
00:16:54,785 --> 00:16:56,817
(SCOFFS)
Can you believe that guy?
366
00:16:59,654 --> 00:17:03,320
Ah, so suave,
and so clever.
367
00:17:03,355 --> 00:17:05,654
Lead, and I will follow,
my liege.
368
00:17:08,157 --> 00:17:10,289
Maybe Wheezin' Ed
is just dead.
369
00:17:10,324 --> 00:17:12,556
You know,
no ghost or nothing.
370
00:17:12,592 --> 00:17:14,190
Yeah, right.
371
00:17:14,225 --> 00:17:16,357
Like he just died
and rotted
372
00:17:16,393 --> 00:17:18,525
and his bones are lying around
somewhere in this cave.
373
00:17:18,560 --> 00:17:19,659
Yeah.
374
00:17:19,694 --> 00:17:21,693
What a
comforting thought, Sid.
375
00:17:22,561 --> 00:17:23,859
(BOTH SCREAMING)
376
00:17:25,663 --> 00:17:27,428
Hey, wait a minute.
377
00:17:29,830 --> 00:17:30,862
(LAUGHS)
378
00:17:30,898 --> 00:17:32,763
I guess we were both
kind of jumpy, huh?
379
00:17:34,432 --> 00:17:37,464
So, this cave
is pretty cool, huh?
380
00:17:37,500 --> 00:17:40,065
It's beautiful
in a desolate kind of way.
381
00:17:40,101 --> 00:17:44,100
I keep thinking I'm going to
turn a corner and fall into
a giant hole or something.
382
00:17:44,135 --> 00:17:45,701
I don't think so, Gerald.
383
00:17:45,736 --> 00:17:48,568
This appears to be a cave
of the striated variety.
384
00:17:48,604 --> 00:17:51,403
This kind of rock primiation
with its series
of smaller passages
385
00:17:51,438 --> 00:17:53,537
radiating out
form a central gallery
386
00:17:53,572 --> 00:17:56,672
indicates that there wouldn't
be a sudden vertical drop
like that.
387
00:17:56,707 --> 00:17:58,838
Oh... Good.
388
00:17:59,675 --> 00:18:01,307
(INSECT BUZZING)
389
00:18:04,443 --> 00:18:06,974
Praise Thor,
the Thunder God!
390
00:18:09,144 --> 00:18:10,410
Wait a minute.
391
00:18:10,445 --> 00:18:13,611
Something I'm supposed
to remember about
these jelly beans.
392
00:18:13,646 --> 00:18:16,011
Maybe if I eat a few more
I'll remember.
393
00:18:20,682 --> 00:18:21,946
Come on, Morrie,
394
00:18:21,981 --> 00:18:24,381
let's take these into town
and trade them
for some supplies.
395
00:18:24,417 --> 00:18:26,715
Uh, speaking of supplies, Vic,
396
00:18:26,750 --> 00:18:30,583
you noticed we spent
more than $900
on copper?
397
00:18:30,619 --> 00:18:33,818
Not to mention my labor
carving these faces
on them.
398
00:18:33,853 --> 00:18:35,151
What's your point?
399
00:18:35,187 --> 00:18:38,619
Look, maybe
we should move up
to counterfeiting dimes, Vic.
400
00:18:38,654 --> 00:18:40,753
Oh, what are you,
a big shot now?
401
00:18:40,789 --> 00:18:43,087
Next, you'd be talking about
making quarters.
402
00:18:43,122 --> 00:18:44,887
Come on, you bum,
let's go.
403
00:18:46,190 --> 00:18:46,955
(HELGA GRUNTS)
404
00:18:46,990 --> 00:18:48,889
Watch where you're
going, geek bait.
405
00:18:48,925 --> 00:18:50,856
Well, don't follow
so close then.
406
00:18:50,891 --> 00:18:53,824
Right. I'm having
the worst day of my life,
407
00:18:53,859 --> 00:18:56,793
stuck in some smelly cave
with a football head.
408
00:18:56,828 --> 00:19:00,527
Look, why don't I take
this tunnel and you take
that one.
409
00:19:00,562 --> 00:19:01,727
See ya.
410
00:19:04,963 --> 00:19:08,797
Why? Why can't I speak
the truth to the one I love?
411
00:19:08,832 --> 00:19:12,597
Why must I constantly
push away that to which
I would cleave?
412
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,132
This is it.
413
00:19:16,167 --> 00:19:17,599
It's now or never, Helga.
414
00:19:17,635 --> 00:19:20,334
Go, confess your love to him.
415
00:19:27,372 --> 00:19:28,370
Arnold!
416
00:19:28,405 --> 00:19:29,269
Huh?
417
00:19:29,305 --> 00:19:30,570
I... I... (PANTING)
418
00:19:33,873 --> 00:19:35,539
Wait a minute,
you hear something?
419
00:19:35,574 --> 00:19:36,839
Hear something?
420
00:19:38,241 --> 00:19:39,507
(WHEEZING)
421
00:19:39,543 --> 00:19:41,141
It's Wheezin' Ed!
422
00:19:41,176 --> 00:19:42,375
(SHRIEKS)
423
00:19:45,211 --> 00:19:46,309
(LOUD SCREAMS)
424
00:19:57,682 --> 00:19:59,214
ALL: Brainy!
425
00:19:59,249 --> 00:20:00,448
What are you doing here?
426
00:20:01,149 --> 00:20:02,148
Uh...
427
00:20:03,317 --> 00:20:04,482
Something.
428
00:20:04,517 --> 00:20:05,982
(ALL GROANING)
429
00:20:08,819 --> 00:20:11,685
Yuck! Don't get
so cozy, buster.
430
00:20:11,721 --> 00:20:12,918
Sheesh.
431
00:20:12,954 --> 00:20:15,085
Come on, you guys,
we should just go.
432
00:20:15,120 --> 00:20:16,286
(ALL GRUMBLING)
433
00:20:19,756 --> 00:20:21,421
And if there
wasn't a Wheezin' Ed,
434
00:20:21,457 --> 00:20:23,422
then I guess there
really isn't any treasure.
435
00:20:23,458 --> 00:20:24,489
(SCREAMING)
436
00:20:25,525 --> 00:20:26,857
Are you okay, Arnold?
437
00:20:26,892 --> 00:20:28,157
Is your head open?
438
00:20:29,159 --> 00:20:30,958
(ALL SCREAMING)
439
00:20:40,764 --> 00:20:41,762
(ALL SCREAMING)
440
00:20:42,597 --> 00:20:43,863
(ALL GASP)
441
00:20:43,898 --> 00:20:46,764
ALL: The treasure
of Wheezin' Ed!
442
00:20:47,399 --> 00:20:48,530
(ALL CHEERING)
443
00:20:59,570 --> 00:21:00,635
(EXCLAIMING)
444
00:21:01,704 --> 00:21:04,703
You know, Arnold,
these look a lot like pennies.
445
00:21:04,739 --> 00:21:05,837
Only not made as good.
446
00:21:05,872 --> 00:21:08,037
What? You mean,
counterfeit pennies?
447
00:21:08,473 --> 00:21:09,937
Yeah.
448
00:21:09,973 --> 00:21:12,973
But who'd be stupid enough
to do a thing like make
counterfeit pennies?
449
00:21:13,007 --> 00:21:15,474
Hey, you punks!
What do you think
you're doing?
450
00:21:15,509 --> 00:21:18,107
(SCREAMS)
It's Wheezin' Ed and...
451
00:21:18,910 --> 00:21:20,041
And some other guy!
452
00:21:22,044 --> 00:21:23,343
VIC: Come back, here.
453
00:21:23,379 --> 00:21:25,010
MORRIE: (CHUCKLES)
Yeah. What he said.
454
00:21:25,045 --> 00:21:26,344
(ALL PANTING)
455
00:21:26,380 --> 00:21:28,211
Do you know the way out?
456
00:21:28,247 --> 00:21:30,812
Don't worry, Gerald.
Just follow the jelly beans.
457
00:21:33,181 --> 00:21:34,413
(ALL SCREAMING)
458
00:21:36,549 --> 00:21:37,714
(ALL PANTING)
459
00:21:45,185 --> 00:21:47,852
(SCREAMS) No! Help me!
460
00:21:49,354 --> 00:21:50,318
(BOTH PANTING)
461
00:21:51,988 --> 00:21:53,787
Look, we're almost out.
462
00:21:53,822 --> 00:21:55,388
(SCREAMING)
463
00:21:58,323 --> 00:21:59,221
(RUMBLING)
464
00:21:59,657 --> 00:22:01,189
(ALL PANTING)
465
00:22:08,326 --> 00:22:10,058
(ALL GASP)
466
00:22:10,094 --> 00:22:11,760
OFFICER: Freeze!
467
00:22:11,795 --> 00:22:14,894
You two are under arrest
for the running of an illegal
counterfeit penny operation.
468
00:22:14,929 --> 00:22:16,428
Oh, nuts.
469
00:22:16,463 --> 00:22:17,628
How'd you find us?
470
00:22:17,663 --> 00:22:20,629
This character tried
to pass off one of
your phonies.
471
00:22:20,664 --> 00:22:24,464
Argh! Tippin' the
serving wench at
Ivar's Fish and Chips.
472
00:22:24,500 --> 00:22:25,498
Right.
473
00:22:25,533 --> 00:22:27,766
Now get those kids
in the boat pronto
474
00:22:27,801 --> 00:22:30,366
while I read these two clowns
their Marumba rights.
475
00:22:32,102 --> 00:22:34,768
Haunted caves. Doy.
476
00:22:34,803 --> 00:22:37,835
Yeah, I guess there really
isn't a Wheezin' Ed.
477
00:22:37,871 --> 00:22:40,168
I don't know, Gerald.
Just don't know.
33604
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