Original subtitles

Same to you, old boy.

Hi, Captain. Boy, there's nothing like an invigorating ride in the country air.

You mean the cold air.

Come on in and warm up, Landlubber.

Ah, that's better.

Hmm, the news should be on.

The famous opera singer Bianca Castafiore arrived in San Theodoro

She is scheduled to give a command performance for General Tapioca this

Traveling with her are two highly trained detectives, who have been

keep an eye on Madame's extensive jewelry, which is reportedly insured for

two million dollars.

Madame Castafiore will continue her triumphant tour through the rest of this

month, and will return to your... Who?

Who?

Yes,

Julian Wagg. Now, look here. I just saw Bianca on the telly. If she needed

insurance, you should have sent it to me.

But, listen, I... Well,

that's great, but... And while I've got you, Captain, what about the policy on

your estate?

I can give you a terrific deal. What do you say?

That's what I say.

Ostrogoth. First Bianca Castafiore, then Jolion Wag.

What a way to start the weekend.

Bianca Castafiore was arrested last night in San Theodoro. She is accused of

plotting against General Tapioca. She is being held at house arrest.

Tintin! Tintin!

Tapioca's arrested to Castafiore! Are you kidding?

No, I'm not. The radio said she was plotting against him or something.

Castafiore plotting?

That's absolutely ridiculous.

I'm sure it's just a misunderstanding.

Tintin! Captain, look!

That... Dictator Tapioca has arrested Madame.

Documents detailing the plot were found in Madame Castafiore's luggage.

That's terrible. The documents named Tintin, Captain Haddock, and Professor

Calculus as co -conspirators. Simply terrible.

Oh, my. General Tapioca has ordered a full investigation.

What a load of bilge water.

We'd better set Tapioca straight.

Let's send him a telegram denying the charges.

your dusty mansion, puppet masters in despile conspiracy, tremble crooked

Captain Haddock.

Crooked yourself, you dictatorial duck -billed diplodocus. I have just

received this.

It is a telegram from Tintin denying the charges.

Well, I'm a reasonable man.

This may be an innocent misunderstanding.

Huh? And that is why I... I invite Tintin and his friends to come to

Tapiocopolis to clear this matter up.

I personally guarantee them safe passage for a fair and frank exchange of views.

My only aim is to seek out the truth.

Well, that's good enough for me.

Hmm. Could be a trick.

But he promised a safe passage. Promises are cheap.

Weep? Madam is weeping? Oh, dear. We must go to Tapiocapolis immediately.

No, Professor.

Maybe Tintin's right.

Well spoken, Captain. I'll pack right away for the flight.

Professor...

Are

you still worried about the trip?

I just don't like it, Captain.

Something's not right.

Nothing's going to happen.

Trust me.

Hmm.

It says here that Tapioca got into power by toppling the last ruler in a

military coup.

That was General Alcazar. He's a friend of mine.

Really? Where is he now?

The last I heard, he was hiding in the jungle trying to organize the

Listen to this.

In the past year, Tapioca has come under attack from a terrorist group called

the Picaros.

Tourists are advised to be careful.

It's okay, Captain. Those must be Alcazar's men.

Oh, that's okay then. For a minute there, I was getting worried too.

Welcome to Tapioca Police.

Thank you, but I'm just captain.

Such modesty.

Senor Tintin? Yes?

General Tapioca has been detained on business.

I am Colonel Alvarez, his aide -de -camp. How do you do?

Ah, and you must be Professor Calculus.

A pleasure to meet you, Senor Professor.

Forgive me, officer, but I cannot shake the hand of someone who disregards human

rights.

Don't take any notice of calculus.

He's just making a joke. Of course.

Now, if you gentlemen will follow me, I will take you to your accommodations.

How is Madame Castafiore?

She is very well, senor. Can we see her?

I'm sorry, but I am afraid that is not possible. And what about Madame

Castafiore? Senor?

Don't tell me you've forgotten about her.

No, senor. It is not possible to forget Madame Castafiore.

Carnival? It is a very big affair.

Performers come from all over the world.

Hmm, sounds like fun.

Si, Senor Commodore.

Colonel, where are you taking us? I thought we were staying in the city. The

city gets very noisy during Carnaval, so General Tapioca made new arrangements

to get you peaceful accommodations in the country.

You've got us well guarded. A simple precaution against terrorists.

Nothing to be alarmed about.

I trust these accommodations will be to your liking, senores?

They're fine.

Ah, Manolo.

Manolo has been assigned to look after you. Just call and he will come.

I will leave you now.

Please, make yourselves comfortable.

He looks like a thug.

Maybe we misjudged Tapioca. This place seems comfortable enough.

Remember your orders, Manolo.

Si, senor coronel. You will watch them very carefully.

Si, senor coronel.

They do not suspect anything, Colonel Spence.

Good. My plan is working.

You were right, Colonel.

Tintin could not resist coming to Tapio Coppoli to check the false documents we

planted on Castafiore.

Interference comes naturally to him.

He ruined one of my most important operations in Borduria because he cannot

his own business.

However, this time...

He will regret it.

Ah.

Ah.

What a beautiful night. I think I'll open the doors.

Must be stuck.

Confounded thing.

Confounded!

Senor will be fine if you put away that blunderbuss.

Why won't the windows open?

They are sealed for air conditioning to keep the cold air in.

Well, turn off the canned air and let's get some fresh air.

Windows, they do not open.

Buenas noches, senor.

No!

Thanks, friend.

Really, you try too hard.

I clean up.

You do that. There's a good chap.

Now, where did I put my tobacco?

Señor, where are you going?

To get some tobacco.

No, señor.

Too late.

Our stores are closed now. Then I'll just take a walk instead.

No, señor.

It's not allowed.

Not allowed?

It's no good for security.

Picaros might attack.

I must insist you go back to Rome, senor.

Insist, huh?

Okay.

Good night.

You were right, Tintin.

You want to hear some music, Captain?

Music? No, I don't want music. I say that we're prisoners.

Turn it off!

Shh!

Look.

It's a microphone.

You mean they can hear us?

Not only that.

They're watching us as well.

Fintan has found us out, Colonel Spontz.

He is no fool.

Never mind.

He is only a few short hours from death.

We've got to get out of here.

Maybe we could escape when we meet with Tapioca.

If we're allowed to meet with him.

Come in.

Buenas tardes, senors.

Manolo had a minor accident.

I am his replacement.

Do you mind? I love this music.

Oh, not at all.

Ah, lunch.

I'm starved.

Not that Booyah base again.

You are in great danger, Senors.

Tomorrow, an attack by the Picaros will be faked. Thank you.

In the course of the fighting, you will all be killed.

Killed?

It will be meant to look like an unfortunate accident.

Why does General Tapioca want to kill us?

It is not General Tapioca.

It is Colonel Spons.

Spons? The chief of police in Shoho?

That is the one.

He's been assigned to General Tapioca to reorganize his security police.

General Alcazar says not to worry.

No, thanks.

General Alcazar?

Si, senor. I work for him.

No, thank you.

Oh, I can't believe it.

What? Oh, just a bird.

In the window.

A beautiful one.

What's Alcazar's plan?

Tomorrow, you will be taken on a trip to see the Pyramid of Hathwathaputl. You

will ask these soldiers if you can climb to the top.

I will go with you.

When we are safely out of the way, General Alcazar... Blistering barnacles!

That tastes horrible!

Pardon me, senor?

As I was saying, once we are out of the way, an attack by the real Pacheros will

be mounted.

Divine is excellent, senor.

Balderdash!

It worked.

So the Pacheros will attack.

And then what, Pablo?

Uh, yes.

In the confusion, you will time me up and escape.

General Alcazar will be waiting for you in the jungle.

Pablo.

Thanks. It is nothing, senor.

Your friend seems preoccupied. Oh, so you've noticed.

He's upset that we haven't met with General Tapioca yet.

Oh, I forgot.

The general sends his apologies.

He will see you tomorrow morning.

Oh, really?

Great.

What?

Why are we stopping?

I thought we were going to the pyramid.

A slight change in plan, senor. What do you mean, a slight change in plan? We

want to go to the pyramid.

We will go to the pyramid shortly, Captain. But first, we stop for your

Huh?

Oh, yes, of course.

It's magnificent.

If you wish to climb it, I will take you up. Lead the way.

Señores.

Be careful. The steps are very steep.

We'll be careful, Colonel.

Come on, Professor.

Come along, Professor.

No, thank you, Captain. I suffer from fear of heights.

Don't be silly.

Great sunspots, Captain.

Leave me alone.

I tell you, I don't want to. Come on. You don't want to miss the view.

Will you stop it, Captain? For goodness sake.

I can't believe it.

That took longer than I thought.

We must hurry, senor. Here, tie me up.

Unqualifiable, Captain.

Unqualifiable. That's what it is. We made it. My word.

Now what's going on?

It's time.

Captain, take the professor and find Alcazar. We'll catch up with you.

I demand to... Thank you, Pablo. I will never forget... Quick, senor. You may

thank me later.

Come on, Professor.

Leave me alone.

Follow us.

Come alive, Professor. Into the truck.

Alcazar! Hop in, amigo!

So, the trap is sprung.

Good work, Pablo.

It was quite easy, Colonel.

Puma to Jaguar. Come in.

Jaguar to Puma.

Receiving you.

Alcazar's truck is on its way. It should reach your position in approximately

seven minutes.

Don't miss it.

Over. Do not worry, Puma. I cannot miss.

Over and out.

You see, General Alcazar is true to his friends. As soon as I got your message,

I... Our message?

But Pablo came to us with your message.

What message?

What are you saying, amigo?

Target approaching.

Pablo is one of my most loyal men.

Then why did he lie to both of us?

Load.

No. Pablo would not betray me.

Would you stake your life on that, General? Hey, there's something on the

Here, take a look.

Thanks. It's just a monkey.

Aim!

Wait. Something frightened him.

Stop the truck, General.

Are you crazy, amigo?

Stop!

Get out of here.

Professor? I most strongly suggest that whoever was driving this truck invest in

a few lessons.

Come on, Professor.

Hinging, I can walk. Fire!

Spons will be pleased. You have done well, Pablo.

I can't believe Pablo.

That renegade!

Devil crosser!

Turncoat! Swine!

Actually, he really did do us a favor.

Ha! Now Colonel Spons thinks we are dead, so we're free to come up with a

to rescue our friends, Bianca and the Thompsons.

You're forgetting, we're stuck in the middle of a jungle.

Not for long.

Alcazar said we should reach his camp soon.

That should be a treat.

Hey, amigos.

I've been thinking.

You want to join the Picaros? Hey!

Oh, great.

That's all we need.

We've gone from being plotters to prisoners.

Ambush victims to terrorist guerrillas.

What next?

Oh, what are you laughing at?

Apparently, Captain, I didn't understand why we came down the pyramid so quickly

when you forced me to climb up there in the first place. Give me strength.

It all started when General Tapioca arrested Madame Castafiore and

Thompson and Thompson in San Theodoro. This may be an innocent

And that is why I invite Ting Ting and his friends to clear this matter up. We

must go to Tapiocapolis immediately.

It says here that Tapioca got into power by toppling the last ruler in a

military coup.

That was General Alcazar. He's a friend of mine.

In the past year, Tapioca has come under attack from a terrorist group called

the Picaros. It's okay, Captain. Those must be Alcazar's men.

You are in great danger, Senors.

Tomorrow, an attack by the Picaros will be faked.

In the course of the fighting, you will all be killed.

Killed? Tomorrow, you will be taken on a trip to see the Pyramid of Hot Water

Park. You will ask these soldiers if you can climb to the top.

Once we are out of the way, an attack by the rear vaqueros will be mounted.

General Alcazar!

Hop in, amigo!

Alcazar's truck is on its way.

Don't miss it. Over.

Stop the truck, General!

Are you crazy, amigo?

Stop!

No one could survive that.

Now General Tapioca thinks we're dead, so we're free to come up with a plan to

rescue our friends.

You want to join the Picaros, eh?

Oh, great.

That's all we need.

We've gone from being plotters to prisoners, ambush victims to terrorist

guerrillas. What next?

How much longer do we have to tramp through this overgrown plant store?

It is not far to the camp now.

How many Picaros are there, General?

Thirty or so.

30? Is that enough to overthrow Tapioca? With me as their leader, 30 Picaros can

do anything. We plan to sneak into the capital during Carnival and free your

friends.

Captain?

Captain, are you okay?

Anchors away!

How did they get those bottles?

Tapioca drops them into the jungle. He knows the picaros will drink them, so

they will not be able to fight.

The Bandito River will lead us to the picaro camp.

Take cover!

If it is one of Tapioca's.

Let us hope they didn't see us. Captain!

Looks like the bottles got here before we did.

General, come join the party.

Caramba!

Avive, General!

Alcatraz!

You've got some nerve, sneaking out of the camp without telling me. If you

you can just run off and leave me any time you want, you've got another thing

coming. Understood?

Yes, my dog.

These are my old friends, Captain Haddock, Teen Teen, and Professor

My dear lady, your lovely welcome has moved me deeply. It shall be a pleasure

share your delightful company as we prepare for war.

Oh, well, they can stay in the tool hut. She may seem a

little harsh, but she has a heart of gold.

What a charming woman. Such grace and beauty.

As for her husband, his revolution will never succeed if his army keeps

drinking. I know.

There goes our best chance to rescue the Thompsons and Madame Castafiore.

Luckily for everyone, I've been doing some herbal experiments in jungle

apothecary. Jungle apothecary? No, not at all, Captain. I've developed

that will make those men stop drinking.

Anyone taking one of these pills will find the taste of alcohol unbearable.

the very first person whom I tested it on was you, Captain. Me?

You miserable, blundering, barbecued blister! My sister has nothing to do

it. It's a scandal.

Hmm.

Pills. The Picaros will probably resist it. My sister? I've asked you to leave

her out of it.

No, Professor.

The Picaros will resist taking these pills.

Unless we sneak them into their food. It's worth a try.

Come to think of it, I don't have a sister.

But if I did, this is the last place I'd want her to be.

General, I know how to stop the Picaros from drinking. But first you have to

promise that the revolution will be peaceful. No executions.

A revolution without executions?

I would be the laughing stock of the country.

But wait.

Surely, we can make another deal.

How about a feast of gold reserves in El Banco de la Nación?

I'm not interested in money. I want a peaceful revolution.

Forget it. I'll get the Picaros under control myself.

Huh?

I have changed my mind. I will accept your conditions.

Now, my friends, you must watch the ridiculous justice of General Tapioca.

coverage? Even in a remote jungle camp?

Before you sit two evil, brutal men. So cunning are these would -be

assassins. They have even grown mustaches to better fit in and gain our

We object. We will bone with our mustaches. Silence!

I find you guilty.

Death! It's not fair.

I told you, amigo.

As for you, Bianca Castafiore, you will spend the rest of your life in prison.

Oh, you are making a joke, no? A silly joke made by a silly little soldier.

It's no joke.

Here is proof.

You make me laugh.

Was I ever Marguerite? Oh, my.

Gentlemen, please.

Kill him.

Hang the traitor.

What's going on?

The spy.

I caught him dropping pills into the chief.

He was trying to poison us.

General?

It's okay, amigos.

Those pills were only vitamins.

I don't trust this food. The dog must eat it first.

Doggy Woggy, come.

Good stuff.

You see?

Totally safe.

aren't sure.

That's my buttons. Look who it is. It's Tintin and the Captain.

Jolly on wag.

You've got it, old friend.

Oopsie -daisy.

Me and my troupe, the Jolly Follies, have been invited to perform at the big

carnival.

I designed those costumes myself.

Nice, eh? Don't you think?

Very interesting.

What's going on, amigo?

Ah, the chap in charge. Mind if my gang spends the night in your camp?

Forget it!

Uh, General?

Perhaps I spoke a little hastily, my friend.

You may stay here as long as you like.

lazy peggy my doll at dawn we left to overthrow the tyrant tapioca love

alcazar p .s due to the revolution i will not be home in time to cook dinner

Leaking off with Wag's boss like this.

What's more important?

Some silly tourist or winning the revolution and saving your friends from

firing squad?

If you put it that way.

But will we make it in time?

Another hour and we will be there in time for part two of your plan.

Long live the revolution!

End an execution on the same day.

Isn't life grand, Colonel Alvarez?

It is with you as our leader, Your Excellency.

Look at those people.

All of them love me.

Is it really safe to stand on this balcony?

What if a few treacherous picaros have sneaked into town?

The picaros?

Nonsense.

Colonel's sponsors taking care of them, haven't you, Colonel?

You worry too much.

The Picaros are far away and too drunk to be of any danger. You see, Colonel

Albert, you worry too much.

And what is this?

Remember your promise, General. No bloodshed. See?

I remember.

Ready with the core form?

The show's over, Tapioca.

Is this a joke?

The biggest joke ever.

Alcazar. That's General Alcazar to you.

Captain, look who's at the window.

Colonel Spock.

We meet again.

I heard you were behind this, Spock.

Nonsense.

The Bordurian government has sent me here as an official representative to

advise General Tapioca's military.

He's lying. Be quiet.

No. Let's hear it, Alvarez.

He wanted revenge for when you humiliated him in his homeland.

So he planted false documents on Madame Casafiore and had her arrested.

Knowing I would come to help them.

Nice try, Spont.

Read it.

Read it!

No. I said...

Citizens of San Teodoro, rejoice.

I, General Tapioca, surrender all my power to General Alcazar.

Get these tapes to the radio station.

Have them play it right away.

As for your execution... Uh, General?

execution. No execution?

Are you crazy?

It's not my idea. It's his.

But, senor, he has to execute me. Tradition demands it.

Sorry, Tapioca. You'll be exiled to Borduria with your pal's bonds.

Exiled? You can't! The shame! The humiliation!

Alvarez, unless you want to join Spots in Borduria, you'd better get on the

phone and stop the Thompsons' execution.

Yes, sir.

The phone is dead.

The Picaros must have cut the line. We have to get to the prison at once.

Colonel Alvarez!

Fake Dean Dean and the captain to the prison.

Si, General.

Hurry, amigos.

We have only five minutes to stop the firing squad.

I am sorry,

señores, but it is time. We must go.

Right then.

One must be on time.

Precisely, Thompson.

One must always be on time for one's execution.

Citizens of San Teodoro, rejoice.

I,

General Tapioca, surrender all my power to General Alcazar.

If only we had a car.

A car would never make it through this crowd.

No, but that big globe will.

Cigarette? A Ferraro.

Blindfold? A Thompson likes to look death right in the eye.

Right, Thompson.

Right.

Squad!

Ready! There is the pivot.

Well, Thompson, any last words?

This execution is cancelled.

Sorry we couldn't get here sooner.

Quite all right, Tintin. We're policemen. All in the line of duty.

Now, what about Madame Castafiore?

You fool!

Oh, tell that chef of yours I said al dente!

Come to save me. My dear Irma, Mr.

Wagner, what a pleasure to see you together again.

I must sing something.

As president, I award you the sacred order of San Teodoro.

That would be enough service.

Right. A big hurrah for the...

Without your peel, the revolution could never have been launched.

Beans for lunch?

Oh, no, thank you.

What about you, Ding Ding? Are you sure you will not accept the reward?

Freeing my friends was reward enough for me.

Thanks for keeping your promise.

The revolution is a success.

The Air Force and Navy have rejoined us.

leaving me in the stinking bug -infested jungle while you laze about this

palace. Bring my bags upstairs and get dinner started.

At my door.

Ah, it'll be nice to get back home tomorrow, Spike.

You said it, Captain.