Original subtitles

(Patrons laughing)

(Patrons go silent)

MAN: Well, back to business, boys.

I'm telling you, it's a deal.

And one you're not gonna see again.

Those who linger will lose.

Lose what?

Simple as apple pie:

I work the streets with Kerwood here, selling our wares.

We double the sales in the city, you double your profits,

and Kerwood and me launch the biggest fence operation in town.

How much this gonna cost me?

Nothing.

We buy from you wholesale and sell it retail.

We'll open up one of them dry goods stores

and be the R. H. Macy's of Kansas City.

(All chuckling)

You work for the Pinkertons.

Yes, ma'am. John Bell's the name.

Thought so.

Something wrong?

Didn't think they served your kind in this place.

And what kind is that?

Only colour I see in this joint...

is green.

You're about done here.

What are you doing here?

I'm thirsty.

And figured it's about time I came in here for a drink.

What's your poison?

I'll have a beer.

The more you steal, the more we sell.

We can strike it big here, boyos.

Kansas City is expanding.

And so is crime.

Where's he come from?

Aldred, here? New York City.

Born and raised in the mean streets.

Ready to bring some real know how to this cow town.

You work alone?

He's with me.

We're partners, right?

That black man over there.

Who is he?

A ranch hand. Name's John Bell.

Oh, yeah?

Where's he live?

(Knocking)

Good day, madam.

Aldred Epps here to make your day.

Now I got bromides, bustiers, bangles and brooms.

What's your fancy?

No thank you.

Don't be silly.

Little lady like you out here in the middle of nowhere.

She's got needs.

Sir, take your foot out of my door.

ALDRED: And for the man of the house,

I've got coats, collars, cuff links and combs.

There is a man of the house?

That's none of your concern.

Perhaps you have a ranch hand, to help you with the heavy work?

I've got pants, pots, pulleys, and plates.

Hammers? Nails?

If you think I'm going to buy your wares

or answer any of your questions, you are sadly mistaken.

And here I thought Missourians were a welcoming folk.

Well, I'm not from Missouri.

Hey, what are you doing here?

(Gunshot)

Kate Warne, Madeleine McGoldrick.

Marm. Call me Marm, everyone does.

Oh, wow! That's quite the handshake.

It's a man's world so I shake hands like one.

(Panting)

And this is my partner, Will Pinkerton.

Young man, you're late.

Punctuality is the key to good business.

Well, I like to keep 'em guessing.

It's a finely honed technique of his.

Your father teach you that?

Uh, no.

Didn't think so.

So you're familiar then with the Pinkerton Agency, then.

I'm from New York City, sweetie.

We've all heard of the Pinkertons.

Which is why I thought of you two

when Marm came to me with her problem.

Sheriff, I do appreciate you lookin' after me.

And what is your problem?

It's my dear nephew Aldred.

He's been in Kansas City for over a week now

and when I arrived, day before yesterday,

there I found myself standing on the platform

with neither hide nor hair of him.

It's not like him.

Now that one, he's punctual.

Yes, ma'am.

What exactly brought your nephew to Kansas City?

Sales. He's a peddler.

What does he look like?

About five foot eight.

28 years old. Light hair.

A wiry fella.

The hotel hasn't seen him in over four days

and I'm terribly worried.

Do you think you could help?

I'd pay you handsomely, of course.

Yep, we'll help.

Yes, but-- Wonderful!

(Coins jingling)

That should be enough to get you started.

Does your nephew have friends or acquaintances here in town

that might have seen him?

How should I know? Keep me apprised.

Now would this fine gentleman

escort me to Fionnula's Tea Room?

I've got an appointment.

I would be much obliged.

Sheriff, I do appreciate your consideration.

Call me Lawrence.

Oh!

So much for first impressions.

Ah, she'll come to love me. They all do.

There is a fool born every minute.

Where were you by the way?

Don't ask.

Why were you so hesitant to take the job? I know that look.

Aldred came by my door, tried to sell corsets and brooms.

Why didn't you say something?

I didn't have a chance.

You jumped in, eager to take her money.

Which we need, by the way.

Something wasn't right about him.

His manner was unctuous and overly familiar.

He's a salesman from New York City. What do you expect?

He asked too many questions.

He had something up his sleeve.

And maybe hers too.

Well, now we are being paid to find out what that is.

Couldn't be better.

Shortly after he left, maybe ten minutes,

I heard a gunshot down the road.

That doesn't mean anything in farming country.

People pick off prairie dogs all the time.

Which I put it down to at the time, but the man is missing.

Uh, not today, darling.

Would you happen to know anything about Aldred Epps?

The peddler from New York?

I last saw him in the saloon

with Kerwood Piff, Rufus and his boys.

Rufus Thorpe?

The purveyor of all the finest stolen goods in Kansas City.

I tracked him. He's got a barn just outside of town,

presumably full of stolen goods.

You tracked him?

About a month ago...

I had some spare time with nothing better to do...

They're small time.

Aldred was talking a big game.

I gather he was trying to strike a deal with Thorpe.

Did Aldred have a room here?

Until four days ago, then he just disappeared.

The horse he got from the livery returned without him.

That's the same day I heard the gunshot.

It's not looking good for our traveling salesman.

Did you ever hear that joke?

Just-- Stop. We have to go see Rufus.

No, no, it's really good.

It's not gonna be good. I'm not gonna like it.

No, no, there's a traveling salesman...

John. Hey.

I got some flour, lard and coffee just like you asked.

Got some extra oil for the lamps.

Heard there might be a blizzard coming through tomorrow.

Thank you.

John, there's something else I need you to do for me.

Four days ago, did you see a man at the house, a peddler?

No, ma'am. Can't say I did.

He stopped at my door and shortly after he left,

I heard a gunshot down the road.

I didn't hear a thing.

On your way home, I'd be much obliged

if you'd check alongside the road, see if anything's amiss.

I'll make sure to take a look.

(Neighing)

Whoa.

You were right. This is the thieves' den.

So much for small time.

It's the biggest fence operation in Kansas City.

Must be the cooling off point

before all this stuff hits the black market.

Mother of pearl.

Exquisite taste.

RUFUS: Looking for something?

Hey. Come on, Rufus, no need to be dramatic.

How you doing, anyway? Haven't seen you

since you botched that job in Jacksonville.

We were just admiring your exquisite goods.

Venetian glass from the island of Murano.

A very rare find in these parts.

I'd hate to ask where all these fancy goods came from;

Maybe Sheriff Logan could help us figure that out.

That sounds like a threat.

Oh, no, no, just remarking. I'm sure the law would

be very interested in all these precious items.

To be charged with a crime you need evidence.

You go find your sheriff and by the time you get back here,

this'll all be gone.

Just like that.

We can help each other out.

Lower your guns and let's talk.

We keep quiet about this little treasure trove of yours

and you give us information.

About what? Aldred Epps.

Never heard of him.

Come on, that's not gonna fly.

You boys were seen drinking with him

four nights ago at the Dubois.

He went missing.

His family is determined to learn his whereabouts.

You might want to tell us what you know.

Hate to point fingers and have you boys arrested on assumption.

Yeah, we'd been drinking with Epps that night. Nothing more.

And then what?

We went our separate ways.

What else can you tell us about him?

He was Kerwood Piff's buddy. Go talk to him.

Isn't he one of your boys?

(Laughing)

He'd sure like to be.

But the man's trouble, got a big mouth.

I saw him playing poker two nights ago.

You seen him since then?

Can't say I have.

Thanks for your cooperation.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

(Neighing)

Poor fellow.

Made one bad deal too many.

Odd. He wasn't the one at my door,

yet judging by the gunshot I heard,

the weapon could have been fired from here.

Maybe someone robbed him, and then shot him.

He wasn't killed by a bullet. There's no wound.

This man was beaten and bound to a tree.

He was tied to the tree alive?

And remained there for some time

until he died of exposure to the elements.

How can you tell? Teeth marks.

The poor man was in distress. He tried to bite the bark.

Well, he was dead when I found him.

That would be correct.

There are signs that rigor mortis has abated.

Rigor what?

Rigor mortis. Muscle contractions following death.

They begin several hours after expiration.

The body stiffness reaches its maximum at twelve hours

and begins to dissipate after 24.

It's hard to tell because of the cold temperatures,

but I'd say Kerwood died about 24 hours ago.

Look what I found.

Aldred wore a red boutonniere when he came to my door.

You think he killed Kerwood Piff?

Aldred's been missing for four days.

And like I said, I saw Kerwood playing poker two nights ago.

I didn't notice anything off about him,

but clearly if Aldred is dead, he couldn't have killed Kerwood.

Maybe Aldred's alive.

Anyone could have killed Kerwood.

What do you think?

Who me?

Well, sure. You must have an opinion.

I hate to speculate...

but I'd say this Aldred Epps, if he's still alive,

would be long gone by now.

You don't think he killed Kerwood?

No.

If you'll excuse me, I have some chores to take care of.

Was it something I said?

Oh, no, that's just you.

There you go, young man.

And I must say, you do look fetching.

Thank you, Marm.

Now, when people ask,

you tell them Marm gave it to you as a present.

Yes, Marm. Now off with ya.

(Laughing)

Always good to help a young lad in need.

That was a brand new wool coat.

I deal in dry goods, sweetie.

Advertising's good for business.

Now, what have you heard of my Aldred?

I can't say the news is good.

We have evidence he was at the murder scene of Kerwood Piff.

Never heard of him.

What's he got to do with Aldred?

Aldred was last seen in Kerwood's company,

a known malefactor in town.

Looks like your nephew fell in with a rough crowd.

I must admit,

he was running with a pack of miscreants in New York.

I thought sending him out here would give him a fresh start.

Your nephew means a lot to you.

Oh, yes.

Raised him like my own.

I have to be honest with you, Marm,

I met Aldred before he disappeared.

He came to my door, selling goods.

That's my Aldred, he's an excellent salesman!

I'm sorry to say,

shortly after he left, I heard a gunshot down the road.

Your nephew may very well be hurt.

Or dead?

Oh no, it's not possible.

He's alive. I know it, and you must find him.

And we will. Rest assured.

Thank you.

What if Aldred is dead? You gave her false hope.

Until we find the evidence, there's no harm

in giving the woman a little bit of favourable expectations.

I think false hope is like a snake. It bites back.

I think you think too much.

So what's the plan? I got a poker game in an hour.

Cancel it. We have work to do.

What work? Rufus Thorpe and his boys

are prime suspects in Kerwood's murder.

They know more than they're telling.

So, what, we're crystal gazers now? We can't read their minds.

No, but we can tell them about Kerwood

and judge their reaction.

Good idea. Let me know how it goes.

What? You can handle it.

Don't make me say I need you.

You just did.

(Fiddles playing)

One-two-three, one-two-three.

Damn it, it's one-two-three, one-two-three.

(Laughing)

Okay, which one of you horse's asses just giggled?

(Laughing)

Sorry, fellas. Laughing at men dancing together

is kind of a bad habit of mine.

Figure when a man moves up in the world,

he's gotta learn how to dance with the ladies.

Oh, well, he has a point there.

Mmm-hmm.

You got a lot of nerve busting in here, disturbing the peace.

It's enough to make a man go batty and shoot somebody.

Oh, well, you gotta admit,

dealing in stolen goods has its consequences,

like unwarranted attention from the law.

Oh, don't mind my partner. His manners are dubious at best.

Darn right. Manners count.

We just came to deliver some news.

Don't tell me, you two leaving town?

No, but one of your cohorts has.

Permanently.

Kerwood Piff.

We found him, north of town, frozen to death.

After someone beat the daylights out of him

and tied him to a tree.

What?

Can't say I wished the man harm,

but I'm not surprised.

Old Kerwood did have a pair of loose lips.

Any idea who would be involved in something like this?

Fellow had more than his share of enemies.

But I'm not one to say a bad word about a fellow sinner.

May he rest in peace, amen.

Now, if you'll excuse me.

(Fiddle playing)

One-two-three.

He didn't know. No.

But the seed was planted.

Now let's put them under surveillance

and see what happens next.

Surveillance? Just the two of us?

Three. John'll help.

Oh, come on, it's better than losing your shirt at poker.

Let's go, boys.

Right. You take over. Follow them into the saloon.

This ain't even enough to get me a cup of water.

Oh, Will, for goodness sakes.

MAN: Let's go get that drink.

Don't worry. John's around back.

He'll watch Rufus.

(Groaning)

Oh!

You and me need to talk.

I've been out there forever.

Where the hell's Rufus?

(Yelling)

Oh...

That answer your question?

It was right here, in front of the doorway,

where this man tried to break into my room.

I knocked on her door.

He held me at gunpoint!

She's lying, I got the wrong room.

I can see clearly what we have here.

Take him away.

Wait a minute... I'm the victim here!

He was going to rob me, or worse!

Now...

You threw him over the balcony?

He tripped and fell, after he chased me down the hall.

I was merely trying to protect myself.

He did not trip and fall.

What a terrible shock you've had.

Yes. It was frightful.

Where did a fine and proper lady

learn to thrash an able bodied man?

In New York City, where it's protect yourself or perish.

And were you aware

that your nephew was last seen in the company of Rufus Thorpe,

the man who you claim accosted you?

This poor woman has had a most terrible ordeal.

Now, you'd best leave her be.

Oh, yes.

You are so kind.

Perhaps you'd care to join me for lunch?

Well, I won't say no.

Turning into quite the lady's man, are we?

Try not to butt in.

I got a good thing going here.

Madam...

This isn't playing out.

She knows Thorpe...

As soon as we told him about Piff, he to see her. Why?

Marm and Rufus are clearly lying.

There's no sign of any forced entry.

And there's not a mark on her. And he, on the other hand,

looked like he got run over by a herd of buffalo.

Judging by his reaction to the news of Kerwood's murder,

I don't think Rufus killed him.

He didn't, but maybe she did.

I got questions. As do I.

A guy looking like Thorpe came around the back of the hotel,

but when he got inside the building, I lost him.

Wait. You lost the guy when you went into the hotel?

That's right.

That makes no sense.

How could you lose a guy in the back of the hotel?

There's one staircase to the upper hallway.

He was moving real fast. That's never happened to you?

Sure. Surveillance takes a while to learn.

You did your best, John.

I'm an innocent man.

Aren't we all, Rufus. Now give us something we can use,

'cause he more lies that pass your lips,

the longer you're gonna be in there.

What were you doing at the hotel?

I went there to meet a girl. I got the wrong room.

That's all.

Why use the back door?

The front one wasn't working for you?

She was that kind of girl.

Hey, I'm a red blooded male.

Instead of my lady friend, I ran into that banshee, Marm.

Got the strength of two men she has.

And then a woman kicked you down the stairs?

If you're trying to make me feel less of a man,

you're doing a fine job.

I'm just trying to find out what actually happened.

Why don't you ask your friend, John Bell.

He was there, in the hallway.

He saw it all.

What the hell is going on here?

That makes no sense.

He says John was there. John says he wasn't.

One of them's lying.

Maybe John's got something to hide.

Like what?

He was the one that found Kerwood Piff's body.

Are you saying that John killed Kerwood?

No, but it does beg the question:

what do we really know about John?

He's been a perfect gentleman since the day I met him.

Who hired him to work out there?

The landlord.

At least that's what John told me.

Maybe the landlord knows something about John

that we don't.

I thought my father rented that place for you.

The Chicago office takes care of those details.

The agency pays the rent.

I'm gonna telegraph the Chicago office,

see what I can find.

(Laughing)

Truly, I'm the first real sheriff you've ever met?

Well, we have coppers in New York,

but they've always got their hands out, looking for payoffs.

Unlike you, of course.

Clean as a whistle. That's me.

(Laughing)

Funny. Here I am in the Wild West and I feel so safe.

I do what I can.

I came here looking for my nephew,

but the longer I stay in this town, the more I like it.

I'm considering bringing some of my business to Kansas City

and it would be so reassuring to me knowing that you're here.

Well, I will do whatever I can to help you.

Oh! Thank you, Lawrence.

(Laughing)

(Sighing)

I just wish those Pinkerton agents would find my Aldred.

I am so worried about him.

Of course. Don't worry, I'll get right after them.

I'd be grateful.

That fellow who was with that awful man, Thorpe,

who was he and why didn't you arrest him?

What fella?

In the hotel corridor.

A black man.

Striking.

He may have had a gun.

That must be John Bell. He works for Kate Warne.

I see...

More sherry?

(Laughing)

Well, I can't say no to you.

(Laughing)

Turns out that our Chicago office pays rent

to a holding company:

KC Holdings #6107.

Is there a face behind the company?

There is.

I spoke to the clerk at the county registry in town.

Apparently KC Holdings #6107 is owned by one man,

named John Bell.

John owns the farm?

The clerk says he never saw him face to face.

He set it all up through US Mail and couriers.

Now, why would John keep that information from us?

I don't know.

Let's go talk to your landlord and find out.

What? What are you doing?

Can you honestly say you know the man that lives in there?

Don't be ridiculous.

What's wrong?

There's a body in there. It's not moving.

Aldred Epps?

Don't touch me.

We won't hurt you.

We gotta get this stuff out tonight.

It's getting too risky out there, so load it careful.

That's it, boys. Whatever you can carry, you can keep.

She's gonna take it all anyhow.

Hold up there.

Quit purloining the merchandise.

(Gun cocking)

It belongs to me now.

I dropped the charges.

Got you out of jail.

You owe me.

That doesn't mean you get everything.

Small price to pay for freedom, don't you think?

I get what's owed.

Yeah?

Me too.

I get what's owed me.

Anyone else got something to say?

Best do as she says.

That's right, put it back. All of it!

Oh! Would you look at that?

Beautiful.

And I'll be needing some fresh samples to show new customers.

WILL: Who shot you?

I'm not saying.

The only way we can help you is if you tell us what's going on.

That wound is infected.

You have to get to town and see a doctor.

I ain't going to town.

Would you like me to get a knife and take it out myself?

If we don't deal with that infection soon,

it'll be too late for you.

As long as that woman's in Kansas City, I'm staying put.

What woman?

Marm McGoldrick.

You mean your aunt?

Is that what she said she is?

You know she hired us to find you? You better start talking.

'Cause I'd hate to have to tell her where you are.

The biggest fence in New York City she is.

Did John do this dressing?

He took care of me.

Found me down the road, all shot up and brought me here.

So you know John Bell.

Like a brother.

Grew up together on the streets of New York.

And what about Marm?

She raised us. Orphans we were.

She took us in,

trained us up in the ways of pickpockets and thieves.

Only, John got away...

John's a thief?

He's a good man. He saved my life.

More than once.

All right, let's try this one last time.

Who shot you?

Kerwood Piff.

Marm put him up to it, I know it.

She found out I was setting up shop here in Kansas City

and she got to him.

All the way from New York? You can't escape that woman.

I tried.

I came out here to start a new life.

I had no idea John was here.

Honest. Where is John now?

He went to go try to make a deal with Marm.

We need to bring Sheriff Logan into this.

Well, he's in stable condition for now,

but he has to see a doctor soon.

Well, he ain't going nowhere. You can see that.

Let's work fast.

There, there. Put the gun away.

Why would you want to shoot?

It was so good to see you yesterday.

Stop with the charm. We're well past that.

Can't I ask how you are,

and how you've been these past ten years?

I'm a new man.

Living an honest life.

That's funny.

Stealing money from me to start an honest life.

I sense a contradiction there. It was my only way out.

Angry as I was, I had to admire your cunning.

I'm here now to make it right.

The deed to my farm that I paid for with the cash.

The rest in coins.

That's for Aldred and for me.

He's alive. I knew it.

Where is he?

Oh, my goodness.

You're protecting him.

Who do you think told me about the stolen money?

Yeah, Aldred talked after you beat him half to death.

(Scoffing)

Gold coins. It's all there.

And here I thought you'd understand.

We're family. And family is forever.

You and Aldred.

You're mine. I own you.

Nobody owns me.

Are you sure about that?

I know you killed Kerwood Piff.

Oh, so what are you going to do, tell the sheriff?

My personal friend, Lawrence?

There's the Pinkertons.

You so much as breathe a word to them,

and I will dispatch the Pinkertons

the same way I did poor Mr. Piff.

I see you got a soft spot for that young Kate.

Hate to see her frozen to some tree.

You won't.

You want her alive?

You bring Aldred to the same spot where you found Kerwood.

And we'll work out our differences.

(Gun uncocking)

(Grunting)

Did you find her?

She wouldn't take your money.

She's got me.

There's no way out.

Don't say that.

Here I am, born a free man.

An orphan, but free.

No one owns you, John Bell.

Not even Marm.

When I was a child,

I thought for certain I'd die on the streets.

When Marm got a hold of me, it was like a miracle.

Clothes to wear, food, a family.

But that's not freedom. You know that.

Stealing from innocent people, hurting others?

You call that free?

You were a child. You had no choice.

Didn't I?

I tried to bury the guilt, but I couldn't.

She used us. Took advantage.

I just had to get out.

More than anything I just wanted to walk that righteous path.

Live the good life.

We deserve it, don't we?

It's me she wants, and I'm half dead anyway.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where are you going?

I'm giving myself up.

Stop, we'll get out of town.

And how are we gonna do that?

(Grunting)

Take me to her.

Neither of us will get out of this alive.

She'll kill us both.

I should have known.

Your lock picking skills are exemplary.

I will take that as a compliment.

She hasn't left town yet.

Not yet.

I still say you two are mistaken.

She is a god fearing woman.

Like I said before,

Aldred Epps claims Marm hired Kerwood Piff to kill him.

And we think she killed Kerwood Piff.

You have no proof of that.

I know her. She is a decent lady.

With a taste for finery.

This comes from Rufus Thorpe's treasure trove of stolen goods.

I have no idea what you're talking about.

Well, as Sheriff of Kansas City, you should.

Because he's setting up the biggest fence operation in town.

She's in league with him.

Don't worry. Just do what I say.

I did what you asked.

Bring him to me.

He's injured; he shouldn't be moved.

Do it.

(Gun cocking)

And no funny stuff.

Leave him alone!

Pick up the gun and shoot him.

Go on!

You wanted to make things right.

Here's your chance.

You can walk away free and clear.

(Gun cocking)

(Snickering)

(Guns cocking)

You think I'm that stupid?

Now do as you're told.

Pull the trigger.

Go ahead, shoot. I'm not doing it.

Oh, and you don't think I will?

Sure. You killed Kerwood, didn't you?

Another imbecile. Wanted to go partners with me

but couldn't deliver the one thing I asked of him.

You, dead.

So I killed him.

And anyone else who dares cross me.

Now, both of you, get on your knees.

Do it!

(Grunting)

You want to do business with me? Kill them both.

You're supposed to be backing me up! Do it!

WILL: You ought to be more mindful

about how you treat people around here.

Look upon a man like dirt, don't expect him to back you up.

This is Kansas City, not New York.

Put the gun down.

Put your hands on your head.

(Gun cocking)

(Gun dropping)

I am loath to understand

why you're holding me here in this detestable cell.

How quickly you forget.

You confessed to a murder in front of a bona fide lawman.

I had no choice! They were going to kill me.

You and the truth are distant cousins.

My dear Lawrence, if you'd just let me out of this cubicle,

we could discuss this unfortunate situation.

That's Sheriff Logan to you.

I have money. Have you ever been to Paris?

You just don't quit, do you?

Darling, even after everything we've been through,

I remain completely under your spell.

Madame, I am inured to your charms.

I think you enjoy my charms far more than you care to admit.

Don't flatter yourself.

Any other town you'd be behind bars for charges of grand theft.

Well, we scratched your back, didn't we?

Helped you catch a killer.

And for that, you get to leave town, for good.

If we see your faces in Kansas City again,

we're gonna make those larceny charges stick.

And I'm supposed to thank you for that?

No. Just say, "Adios."

Instead I'll say, "Till we meet again,"

because you just never know...

He owes us, you know. Who?

Sheriff Logan. Made his job a hell of a lot easier

with those reprobates gone.

Somehow I don't think his gratitude will be forthcoming.

I don't blame him. Knowing him,

he'll probably want to forget this whole thing ever happened.

How's your friend?

The surgeon put him in the hospital ward

to take care of the infection.

You did the best you could for him.

Afraid it might not be enough.

Sometimes it's up to people to help themselves.

Like you did.

You pulled yourself together on your own volition,

made a new life for yourself.

There's a lot to admire about you, John.

For example, you're her landlord.

I don't know how you put up with her.

With more patience than you have, I can assure you.

I think I need a drink.

After a week like that, so do I.

I just want to say... thank you...

for all your help back there.

That whole situation could've gone a lot of ways.

I just appreciate everything y'all did.

Does that mean you're buying?

(Chuckling)

Next week on The Pinkertons...

LOGAN: The death of any person

involved in an unsanctioned pugilistic event

shall be deemed murder.

I've known him since I was a child.

I know the type of man he is.

Everyone cheats somehow.

If you're pulling the wool over us, so help you,

they're gonna have to wheel you out of Kansas City.