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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,130 --> 00:00:05,860 - Previously on Impress Me. 2 00:00:05,860 --> 00:00:08,589 - Jim is currently sleeping on our couch, and it turns out 3 00:00:08,589 --> 00:00:11,747 that the understudy that I hired is also allowed 4 00:00:11,747 --> 00:00:14,480 to live here, rent free. 5 00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:17,633 - I'm creating an impressionist competition in which 6 00:00:17,633 --> 00:00:20,820 I am seeking the world's greatest impressionists, 7 00:00:20,820 --> 00:00:24,620 and I will personally give a cash prize of a quarter 8 00:00:24,620 --> 00:00:25,600 of a million dollars. 9 00:00:25,600 --> 00:00:26,630 - You're gonna write a check for a quarter 10 00:00:26,630 --> 00:00:27,463 of a million dollars? 11 00:00:27,463 --> 00:00:28,771 - Yeah. 12 00:00:28,771 --> 00:00:30,350 - I'd like to unveil my one-step program 13 00:00:30,350 --> 00:00:31,910 to quit doing impressions. 14 00:00:34,100 --> 00:00:36,670 Win Piotr's competition. 15 00:00:36,670 --> 00:00:38,120 - Are you going to enter the competition? 16 00:00:38,120 --> 00:00:39,070 - Oh, absolutely. 17 00:00:39,070 --> 00:00:40,290 - Have you actually met the guy 18 00:00:40,290 --> 00:00:41,180 that's giving away the money? 19 00:00:41,180 --> 00:00:42,610 - Have you met Peyote? 20 00:00:42,610 --> 00:00:43,540 - His name's Piotr. 21 00:00:43,540 --> 00:00:45,540 - His impressions are ridiculous. 22 00:00:45,540 --> 00:00:46,837 - Yeah, he's very talented. 23 00:00:46,837 --> 00:00:47,890 - So who's your go-to? 24 00:00:47,890 --> 00:00:51,150 - I do like Matthew McConaughey, Brad Pitt. 25 00:00:51,150 --> 00:00:52,455 I love doing John C. Riley. 26 00:00:52,455 --> 00:00:54,150 - Do John C. Riley. 27 00:00:55,551 --> 00:00:57,540 - I'd rather not. 28 00:00:57,540 --> 00:00:59,620 The thing is that this is my job. 29 00:00:59,620 --> 00:01:01,520 What do you do for a living? 30 00:01:01,520 --> 00:01:02,420 - I'm a graphic designer. 31 00:01:02,420 --> 00:01:04,610 - Right, so I mean, like wouldn't it kinda suck 32 00:01:04,610 --> 00:01:06,470 if like everyone at this party came up to you 33 00:01:06,470 --> 00:01:08,200 and was like hey, can you design a website for me? 34 00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:09,033 - Whatever, I'll make your website. 35 00:01:09,033 --> 00:01:09,866 - Really? 36 00:01:09,866 --> 00:01:11,825 - John C. Riley, feel like I'm gonna wreck. 37 00:01:13,703 --> 00:01:15,490 - You know Wanda don't play that. 38 00:01:15,490 --> 00:01:17,315 What's up little Sasquatch white man? 39 00:01:17,315 --> 00:01:18,555 - Whoa! 40 00:01:18,555 --> 00:01:21,252 - Well, Wanda, you seem like a nice lady, you really do. 41 00:01:21,252 --> 00:01:23,950 But if you're going to impress Nick Offerman, you're gonna-- 42 00:01:23,950 --> 00:01:24,783 - Impress you? 43 00:01:24,783 --> 00:01:25,820 What do I gotta do to impress? 44 00:01:25,820 --> 00:01:27,853 I'm Whoopi Goldberg, I impress the whole world. 45 00:01:27,853 --> 00:01:28,830 I'm an EGOT. 46 00:01:28,830 --> 00:01:31,533 I got an Emmy, a Grammy, and Oscar and a Tony. 47 00:01:32,834 --> 00:01:34,102 - Okay, okay, okay. 48 00:01:34,102 --> 00:01:35,459 My man, huh? 49 00:01:35,459 --> 00:01:36,650 What do we got? 50 00:01:36,650 --> 00:01:38,840 We got Whoopi Goldberg, we got Nick Offerman. 51 00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:41,072 Like we got a battle, huh? 52 00:01:41,072 --> 00:01:42,428 - I'm not really good at battles. 53 00:01:43,410 --> 00:01:44,878 We can go outside and maybe take some medicine. 54 00:01:46,304 --> 00:01:48,960 - You know, speaking of medicines, this is Rosie O'Donnell, 55 00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:50,680 I had a heart attack recently, and you're giving me 56 00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:51,690 another one, sugar plumb. 57 00:01:51,690 --> 00:01:53,120 - Can you do Chris Rock? 58 00:01:53,120 --> 00:01:55,190 You don't know nothing about no Chris Rock. 59 00:01:55,190 --> 00:01:57,100 - You don't know nothing about Chris Rock. 60 00:01:57,100 --> 00:01:58,308 - Oh! 61 00:01:58,308 --> 00:01:59,772 - sound like that! 62 00:01:59,772 --> 00:02:01,942 Chris Rock sound like this. 63 00:02:08,480 --> 00:02:12,327 - I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti. 64 00:02:13,790 --> 00:02:14,850 - And as Jack Nicholson. 65 00:02:14,850 --> 00:02:18,926 I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti. 66 00:02:18,926 --> 00:02:21,690 Washed it down with a Budweiser. 67 00:02:21,690 --> 00:02:22,523 - Dustin Hoffman. 68 00:02:22,523 --> 00:02:24,152 - I'm walking here, I'm walking here! 69 00:02:24,152 --> 00:02:25,533 - Ah, Frank Sinatra. 70 00:02:25,533 --> 00:02:27,738 ♪ I'm walking here ♪ 71 00:02:27,738 --> 00:02:29,486 ♪ I'm walking here ♪ 72 00:02:29,486 --> 00:02:31,643 - You're gonna need a bigger boat. 73 00:02:31,643 --> 00:02:36,047 - Emma Stone, Scarlett Johansson, Chelsea Handler. 74 00:02:36,047 --> 00:02:38,450 I know you're there. 75 00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:41,070 Please leave, don't, when I'm doing this. 76 00:02:41,070 --> 00:02:41,903 Thank you. 77 00:02:41,903 --> 00:02:43,180 I don't want you watching me. 78 00:02:43,180 --> 00:02:44,013 - Miley Cyrus. 79 00:02:44,013 --> 00:02:44,846 - John C. Riley. 80 00:02:44,846 --> 00:02:46,030 Oh, perfect. 81 00:02:46,030 --> 00:02:47,210 - Ronald Regan. 82 00:02:47,210 --> 00:02:48,152 - How're you doing, Ross? 83 00:02:48,152 --> 00:02:49,592 - Are you gonna be in there long? 84 00:02:49,592 --> 00:02:50,680 - It's fun. 85 00:02:50,680 --> 00:02:51,762 You're a beautiful baby. 86 00:02:53,140 --> 00:02:56,010 - A yes, things have definitely change ever since 87 00:02:56,010 --> 00:02:58,161 Piotr announced his big impression competition. 88 00:02:58,161 --> 00:03:01,729 For example, a few weeks ago Andrea and Bianca were planning 89 00:03:01,729 --> 00:03:04,005 this project together, and they were like two peas 90 00:03:04,005 --> 00:03:04,890 in a pod. 91 00:03:04,890 --> 00:03:06,900 - The guys are always comparing their impressions 92 00:03:06,900 --> 00:03:09,398 among other things and that's why they're always fighting, 93 00:03:09,398 --> 00:03:11,661 or trying to quit doing impressions all together. 94 00:03:11,661 --> 00:03:13,112 But we are different. 95 00:03:13,112 --> 00:03:15,650 It's about doing what you do best. 96 00:03:15,650 --> 00:03:17,330 So, if we wanna both do Liza Minnelli, well then 97 00:03:17,330 --> 00:03:19,600 I think we should both do Liza Minnelli here 98 00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:20,770 in this coffee shop-- 99 00:03:20,770 --> 00:03:22,594 - Fine, you're making me do it, I'll just do it. 100 00:03:22,594 --> 00:03:25,850 - But, after Piotr announced his competition, 101 00:03:25,850 --> 00:03:27,752 you could tell it kinda got in the way of things. 102 00:03:27,752 --> 00:03:29,609 - You come out, you introduce me, and then 103 00:03:29,609 --> 00:03:30,820 I will do my thing. 104 00:03:30,820 --> 00:03:33,386 - So, when I introduce you, am I introducing you 105 00:03:33,386 --> 00:03:37,440 as my impression, or am I introducing your impression? 106 00:03:37,440 --> 00:03:38,930 - Didn't we already go over this? 107 00:03:38,930 --> 00:03:40,380 - Do you want me to get it right or not? 108 00:03:40,380 --> 00:03:42,090 - But it's not only the women. 109 00:03:42,090 --> 00:03:44,841 A few weeks ago, Selena's boyfriend Reggie had really been 110 00:03:44,841 --> 00:03:46,160 bonding with Jim. 111 00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:48,670 - Impressions are a job. 112 00:03:48,670 --> 00:03:49,780 It's not a passion. 113 00:03:49,780 --> 00:03:51,546 - Oh, wow, for you, that's true. 114 00:03:51,546 --> 00:03:52,379 - Yeah. 115 00:03:52,379 --> 00:03:53,460 - Well, you're so good, though, Reggie, man. 116 00:03:53,460 --> 00:03:56,440 'Cause you treat it as a job, and yet you deliver 117 00:03:56,440 --> 00:03:57,480 as if it's a passion. 118 00:03:57,480 --> 00:03:59,200 So, you've made some kind of peace with it. 119 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:02,574 - Well, let me be clear, when I become President Obama 120 00:04:02,574 --> 00:04:06,960 and folks all over this great nation, they wanna come up, 121 00:04:06,960 --> 00:04:09,660 take pictures, they wanna shake my hand, they hand me 122 00:04:09,660 --> 00:04:11,760 their babies to kiss, it's a good feeling. 123 00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:13,440 - Are you sure they're handing you their babies to kiss? 124 00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:14,590 Maybe their handing you the babies 'cause they say 125 00:04:14,590 --> 00:04:15,890 here, you take care of him. 126 00:04:15,890 --> 00:04:16,939 I can't afford him, this economy. 127 00:04:17,773 --> 00:04:18,681 - See? 128 00:04:18,681 --> 00:04:20,730 You still love doing impressions. 129 00:04:20,730 --> 00:04:21,563 - It's fun. 130 00:04:21,563 --> 00:04:23,298 It's always gonna be kind of a, it's like for this, 131 00:04:23,298 --> 00:04:24,977 it's like we're paling around. 132 00:04:24,977 --> 00:04:25,810 - Jim? 133 00:04:25,810 --> 00:04:29,250 To me, it sounds like doing impressions is a rather 134 00:04:29,250 --> 00:04:31,687 inconvenient truth for you that's had a dramatic, 135 00:04:31,687 --> 00:04:34,880 lasting effect over your life. 136 00:04:34,880 --> 00:04:38,261 - But after Piotr announced his quarter million dollar prize 137 00:04:38,261 --> 00:04:41,640 Reggie and Jim have been very distant. 138 00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:42,517 - How's Selena? 139 00:04:42,517 --> 00:04:45,640 - Oh, good, good. 140 00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:46,600 - Annie? 141 00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:47,916 - Good, yeah. 142 00:04:47,916 --> 00:04:49,100 How's Ross? 143 00:04:50,787 --> 00:04:52,620 - He's good. 144 00:04:53,480 --> 00:04:55,642 Are you working on any new impressions? 145 00:04:56,510 --> 00:04:57,480 - No. 146 00:04:57,480 --> 00:04:58,422 You? 147 00:04:58,422 --> 00:05:00,013 - No. - Good. 148 00:05:00,013 --> 00:05:01,662 - What? - Huh? 149 00:05:01,662 --> 00:05:04,140 - The tension is palpable. 150 00:05:04,140 --> 00:05:06,170 Everyone's so focused on their impressions, 151 00:05:06,170 --> 00:05:08,264 no one's even making eye contact anymore. 152 00:05:12,542 --> 00:05:15,679 - I totally geek out, I totally need to geek out. 153 00:05:15,679 --> 00:05:18,710 - It got so bad, I just needed to be out of the house, 154 00:05:18,710 --> 00:05:21,230 so I started going to auditions I wasn't even up for 155 00:05:21,230 --> 00:05:23,368 just to sit in the waiting room so I could clear my head. 156 00:05:28,055 --> 00:05:29,116 - Hey man. 157 00:05:29,116 --> 00:05:30,116 - What's up. 158 00:05:31,666 --> 00:05:34,870 - Which is kinda weird, now that I say that out loud. 159 00:05:37,150 --> 00:05:38,370 - Oh, I'm so sorry. 160 00:05:38,370 --> 00:05:39,203 - That's okay. 161 00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:42,610 - Wait, Ross? 162 00:05:42,610 --> 00:05:43,706 Ross, right? 163 00:05:43,706 --> 00:05:44,980 - Yeah. 164 00:05:44,980 --> 00:05:45,960 - Hey, Sean. 165 00:05:45,960 --> 00:05:49,440 We worked on that indie movie together with Matt Jones. 166 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:50,273 Remember? 167 00:05:50,273 --> 00:05:51,842 And your buddy flipped out on set. 168 00:05:51,842 --> 00:05:54,140 The whole Russel Crowe thing. 169 00:05:54,140 --> 00:05:56,203 - My name is Maximus Tessimus Meridius, commander 170 00:05:56,203 --> 00:05:57,986 of the North. 171 00:05:57,986 --> 00:05:58,920 - All right, yeah, okay. 172 00:05:58,920 --> 00:06:00,184 Sorry. 173 00:06:00,184 --> 00:06:01,017 I'm sorry. 174 00:06:01,017 --> 00:06:02,070 It's not an impression, okay. 175 00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:03,210 You're not an impressionist. 176 00:06:03,210 --> 00:06:05,920 Yeah, I think that moment's permanently burned 177 00:06:05,920 --> 00:06:06,753 into my memory. 178 00:06:06,753 --> 00:06:09,040 Thank you for reminding me of the pain and agony 179 00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:11,271 of that moment and how long it took me to get over it. 180 00:06:11,271 --> 00:06:13,580 Yeah, that kinda rings a bell. 181 00:06:13,580 --> 00:06:16,120 - Yeah, dude, after you guys got fired, I went online 182 00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:17,178 and looked your stuff up. 183 00:06:17,178 --> 00:06:18,555 You're incredible. 184 00:06:18,555 --> 00:06:22,340 You guys are like professional impression guys. 185 00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:23,250 - Thank you. 186 00:06:23,250 --> 00:06:25,080 Yeah, we do like voice matching. 187 00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:26,260 - You should quit acting, man, you're so good 188 00:06:26,260 --> 00:06:28,300 at impressions, I wouldn't even. 189 00:06:28,300 --> 00:06:30,231 Look, actually, I have a favor to ask, though. 190 00:06:30,231 --> 00:06:32,300 My Mom, she's not doing too well. 191 00:06:32,300 --> 00:06:34,160 There's no reason to get sad and morbid about it, 192 00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:36,510 but I don't know. 193 00:06:36,510 --> 00:06:38,260 She could use like a pick me up. 194 00:06:38,260 --> 00:06:40,010 - Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. 195 00:06:40,010 --> 00:06:40,843 Is she all right? 196 00:06:40,843 --> 00:06:44,114 - No, yeah, she's good, but she's a die hard Tom Cruise fan. 197 00:06:44,114 --> 00:06:45,260 - Oh. 198 00:06:45,260 --> 00:06:46,320 - And-- 199 00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:48,620 - Oh, you want me to like call, leave a voicemail 200 00:06:48,620 --> 00:06:49,630 as Tom Cruise? 201 00:06:49,630 --> 00:06:51,260 I get asked this all the time. 202 00:06:51,260 --> 00:06:55,160 Birthday calls, sick calls, prank calls, and the truth is 203 00:06:55,160 --> 00:06:58,970 that I usually decline, but after seeing Hundo and Rachel 204 00:06:58,970 --> 00:07:01,426 and JQ at the party the other night doing their thing, 205 00:07:01,426 --> 00:07:04,193 I kinda felt like a fool for not joining in. 206 00:07:04,193 --> 00:07:06,130 - That would be cool, but you know what would be awesome is 207 00:07:06,130 --> 00:07:09,730 if you actually, if you could come in and do a house visit. 208 00:07:09,730 --> 00:07:10,711 Do it in person. 209 00:07:10,711 --> 00:07:12,063 - Come in person and? 210 00:07:12,063 --> 00:07:13,200 - Yeah. 211 00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:14,280 - I don't know. 212 00:07:14,280 --> 00:07:15,980 The joke wouldn't probably play-- 213 00:07:15,980 --> 00:07:17,500 - Trust me, it'll be great. 214 00:07:17,500 --> 00:07:18,500 It'll be great. 215 00:07:18,500 --> 00:07:19,653 - A home visit? 216 00:07:19,653 --> 00:07:21,052 Honestly? 217 00:07:21,052 --> 00:07:22,840 Eh. 218 00:07:22,840 --> 00:07:24,627 I know, I shouldn't complain. 219 00:07:24,627 --> 00:07:26,510 It'll be nice, actually. 220 00:07:26,510 --> 00:07:29,410 I get to brighten someone's day and work on my Tom Cruise 221 00:07:29,410 --> 00:07:30,710 at the same time. 222 00:07:30,710 --> 00:07:31,543 Really, it'll be fine. 223 00:07:31,543 --> 00:07:32,890 - Yeah? - Yeah. 224 00:07:32,890 --> 00:07:35,610 Well, yeah, just give me her name and number, I guess 225 00:07:35,610 --> 00:07:36,634 a good time to go over-- 226 00:07:36,634 --> 00:07:37,940 - Yes! 227 00:07:37,940 --> 00:07:39,290 Awesome! 228 00:07:39,290 --> 00:07:40,830 Yeah, I'll, you wanna do it now? 229 00:07:40,830 --> 00:07:43,190 Or you wanna do it after your audition, or? 230 00:07:43,190 --> 00:07:44,631 - Oh, I'm not here for an audition. 231 00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:45,980 - What? 232 00:07:47,460 --> 00:07:48,530 - Reggie? 233 00:07:48,530 --> 00:07:49,363 Hey. 234 00:07:57,180 --> 00:07:58,330 - What's going on, man? 235 00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:02,427 - Look, Jim, I just didn't know where else to go. 236 00:08:02,427 --> 00:08:06,463 I'm stuck in Obama, and I can't get out. 237 00:08:06,463 --> 00:08:09,694 - When you're stressed out, as an impressionist, 238 00:08:09,694 --> 00:08:12,900 your mind, it's under a lot of pressure, that affects 239 00:08:12,900 --> 00:08:15,469 your vocal cords, it affects your vision of you, 240 00:08:15,469 --> 00:08:19,240 of yourself, of your own personality. 241 00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:21,943 Your eyes can start to jiggle, it's strange. 242 00:08:21,943 --> 00:08:24,930 Writer's get writer's block, and it's very accepted. 243 00:08:24,930 --> 00:08:27,640 Impressionists get impression block, and it does happen. 244 00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:29,770 It's scientific, it's a real thing. 245 00:08:29,770 --> 00:08:31,139 I've seen it, it's scary. 246 00:08:31,139 --> 00:08:32,950 - How long has it been? 247 00:08:32,950 --> 00:08:35,370 - Last night, I was with Selena and we were 248 00:08:36,808 --> 00:08:40,210 Nevermind, that's not the point. 249 00:08:40,210 --> 00:08:43,682 The point is she told me I was doing it and I had no idea. 250 00:08:43,682 --> 00:08:47,170 So, I went to bed and I thought I'd wake up 251 00:08:47,170 --> 00:08:48,160 and everything would be okay. 252 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:49,827 This morning, it was worse. 253 00:08:49,827 --> 00:08:51,560 - You came to the right place. 254 00:08:51,560 --> 00:08:52,630 You're gonna be fine, all right. 255 00:08:52,630 --> 00:08:54,950 Relax here on the couch, just sit down, chill for a minute. 256 00:08:54,950 --> 00:08:56,052 - Thank you so much. 257 00:08:56,052 --> 00:08:58,170 - All right, where's Ross? 258 00:08:58,170 --> 00:08:59,784 We're gonna need a lot of impressions. 259 00:08:59,784 --> 00:09:02,090 - He's doing that Tom Cruise thing for that sick old lady. 260 00:09:02,090 --> 00:09:02,923 - That's right. 261 00:09:02,923 --> 00:09:04,280 Okay, call Bianca. 262 00:09:04,280 --> 00:09:06,890 - Well, we haven't really been talking since our fight-- 263 00:09:06,890 --> 00:09:07,723 - Oh, please. 264 00:09:07,723 --> 00:09:09,276 Just call Bianca, this is important. 265 00:09:09,276 --> 00:09:12,200 - Wow, what a beautiful home. 266 00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:13,503 - Yeah, it's a home. 267 00:09:13,503 --> 00:09:15,460 Hey, thanks so much for doing this, Ross. 268 00:09:15,460 --> 00:09:16,560 I really appreciate it. 269 00:09:16,560 --> 00:09:18,213 - Oh yeah, it's no problem, really. 270 00:09:18,213 --> 00:09:20,552 - You feeling good about your Cruise today? 271 00:09:20,552 --> 00:09:22,600 - Yeah, it's fine. 272 00:09:22,600 --> 00:09:24,410 Passable, I think. 273 00:09:24,410 --> 00:09:25,950 - Okay, has been to be perfect. 274 00:09:25,950 --> 00:09:27,590 Like I said, my Mom's really not doing well. 275 00:09:27,590 --> 00:09:28,950 We don't how much time she has left. 276 00:09:28,950 --> 00:09:31,066 She really can't even see anything out of her eyes anymore. 277 00:09:31,066 --> 00:09:32,380 - So sorry. 278 00:09:32,380 --> 00:09:33,720 - No, no, no, are you kidding me? 279 00:09:33,720 --> 00:09:34,553 Don't be sorry. 280 00:09:34,553 --> 00:09:37,258 Just, your Cruise has to be perfect. 281 00:09:37,258 --> 00:09:39,576 - Right, yeah no, I'll do my best. 282 00:09:39,576 --> 00:09:42,740 - Just so you know, the premise of this whole 283 00:09:42,740 --> 00:09:45,890 situation today is that I met Tom Cruise at a film premier 284 00:09:45,890 --> 00:09:48,430 and he agreed to come over and stop by and say hi, 285 00:09:48,430 --> 00:09:50,384 but only briefly, so it'll be over really quick. 286 00:09:50,384 --> 00:09:54,510 - Wait, you told her that the real Tom Cruise was going 287 00:09:54,510 --> 00:09:55,760 to come here today? 288 00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:56,593 - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 289 00:09:56,593 --> 00:09:57,426 I've seen your stuff. 290 00:09:57,426 --> 00:09:59,102 You're gonna be great, you can pull it off, I know you can. 291 00:09:59,940 --> 00:10:03,560 - I'm sorry, I really don't feel comfortable with 292 00:10:03,560 --> 00:10:04,460 any of that, that's-- 293 00:10:04,460 --> 00:10:05,691 - Are you joking? 294 00:10:05,691 --> 00:10:07,040 - Are you joking? 295 00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:09,520 Your mother is blind, sick and bedridden. 296 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:10,820 You want me to prank her? 297 00:10:10,820 --> 00:10:13,000 - Ross, if you leave now, she'll think that Tom Cruise took 298 00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:14,680 one look at her and left. 299 00:10:14,680 --> 00:10:16,353 That'll ruin her. 300 00:10:16,353 --> 00:10:18,410 You have to do this. 301 00:10:22,265 --> 00:10:23,485 - I got here as fast as I could. 302 00:10:23,485 --> 00:10:24,470 How's he doing? 303 00:10:24,470 --> 00:10:25,660 - Bianca, here's the situation. 304 00:10:25,660 --> 00:10:28,240 Reggie has, he's kinda wandered off the path. 305 00:10:28,240 --> 00:10:30,950 We're gonna lead him back into being Reggie. 306 00:10:30,950 --> 00:10:33,640 So what we need is we need a lot of impressions, we need 307 00:10:33,640 --> 00:10:36,270 a lot of stuff to kinda break open the log jam. 308 00:10:37,460 --> 00:10:38,293 Maybe you can-- 309 00:10:38,293 --> 00:10:41,050 - I'm Barack Obama, and I approve that idea. 310 00:10:41,050 --> 00:10:42,602 - Bloody hell, it's getting worse! 311 00:10:42,602 --> 00:10:46,850 - Just look Reggie in the eye, just very deeply, 312 00:10:46,850 --> 00:10:49,684 very directly, try to contact him and just rattle off 313 00:10:49,684 --> 00:10:51,870 a few of your great impressions. 314 00:10:51,870 --> 00:10:52,703 Go ahead. 315 00:10:52,703 --> 00:10:53,536 - Okay. 316 00:10:57,820 --> 00:10:59,254 - It doesn't matter which one you start with, we just need 317 00:10:59,254 --> 00:11:00,110 a lot of them. 318 00:11:00,110 --> 00:11:01,190 - I'm sorry, Jim, I can't. 319 00:11:01,190 --> 00:11:02,023 - What are you talking about? 320 00:11:02,023 --> 00:11:03,760 Is this this competition thing? 321 00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:05,510 Will you put that aside for once? 322 00:11:05,510 --> 00:11:06,970 This is a man who needs your help! 323 00:11:06,970 --> 00:11:07,803 - I can't! 324 00:11:07,803 --> 00:11:10,170 I woke up this morning, and I can't do impressions! 325 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:11,460 I don't know. 326 00:11:11,460 --> 00:11:13,540 I've been practicing so many, and studying so hard, 327 00:11:13,540 --> 00:11:14,800 all of a sudden, they're all jumbled together 328 00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:15,680 and I can't do one! 329 00:11:15,680 --> 00:11:17,535 I have no idea what happened, it's like I just have 330 00:11:17,535 --> 00:11:19,970 completely forgotten how to do impressions! 331 00:11:19,970 --> 00:11:20,803 - What? 332 00:11:20,803 --> 00:11:21,950 We've got a show tonight! 333 00:11:21,950 --> 00:11:22,900 - Don't you think I know that? 334 00:11:22,900 --> 00:11:24,100 I've been freaking out all day. 335 00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,720 I have no idea what to do. 336 00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:27,040 - It was a creed that was shouted from the lips of those 337 00:11:27,040 --> 00:11:29,530 that waited in line for three hours and four hours 338 00:11:29,530 --> 00:11:30,950 to bring about change. 339 00:11:30,950 --> 00:11:31,980 - What's happening to us? 340 00:11:31,980 --> 00:11:32,813 - Mom? 341 00:11:32,813 --> 00:11:36,140 I have very, very special that I want you to meet. 342 00:11:39,160 --> 00:11:42,870 - Gertrude, you are just a beautiful woman. 343 00:11:42,870 --> 00:11:44,720 It is so nice to meet you. 344 00:11:44,720 --> 00:11:46,580 - Oh, my sweet Ansel. 345 00:11:48,570 --> 00:11:51,840 Baptize me twice, it really is you. 346 00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:53,710 I know that voice. 347 00:11:53,710 --> 00:11:56,560 God knows I know that voice. 348 00:11:56,560 --> 00:11:59,930 - Oh, well, Gertrude, I enjoy helping people. 349 00:11:59,930 --> 00:12:01,210 I really do. 350 00:12:01,210 --> 00:12:02,410 I've been all over the world, 351 00:12:02,410 --> 00:12:05,030 and I enjoy making a difference. 352 00:12:05,030 --> 00:12:06,860 - Oh, Tom I know. 353 00:12:06,860 --> 00:12:09,707 I have been following you for 34 years. 354 00:12:09,707 --> 00:12:12,685 I probably know you better than you know yourself. 355 00:12:14,659 --> 00:12:16,320 - That's probably true. 356 00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:19,590 - I have no problem getting into character, but if I get 357 00:12:19,590 --> 00:12:23,490 in too deep, bad things kinda tend to happen. 358 00:12:23,490 --> 00:12:25,210 - We need a Christian Bale apology interview, 359 00:12:25,210 --> 00:12:26,633 like two minutes ago. 360 00:12:26,633 --> 00:12:27,720 - Dun da da da da. 361 00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:29,030 Which Christian are we gonna get now? 362 00:12:29,030 --> 00:12:30,924 - Why are you trashing the interview, man? 363 00:12:30,924 --> 00:12:32,550 You're trashing the interview. 364 00:12:32,550 --> 00:12:34,216 - Who are we actually going to believe? 365 00:12:34,216 --> 00:12:35,318 Who should we believe? 366 00:12:35,318 --> 00:12:36,315 - No, no listen! 367 00:12:36,315 --> 00:12:38,015 You're trashing the interview, man! 368 00:12:38,015 --> 00:12:41,126 I try to call her to apologize and you're in here 369 00:12:41,126 --> 00:12:42,730 dun da da da da! 370 00:12:42,730 --> 00:12:44,930 It's distracting, mate! 371 00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:48,110 - So, in a situation like this, it's important for me 372 00:12:48,110 --> 00:12:50,880 to be really grounded in reality. 373 00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:53,293 - Tom, I had a dream about you. 374 00:12:53,293 --> 00:12:56,538 I've had lots of dreams about you, but none of them 375 00:12:56,538 --> 00:12:58,640 as sexually explicit-- 376 00:12:58,640 --> 00:13:00,088 - Okay, Mom, let's not, Mom. 377 00:13:00,088 --> 00:13:01,130 Mom! 378 00:13:01,130 --> 00:13:02,072 Easy-- 379 00:13:02,072 --> 00:13:03,151 - Sean! 380 00:13:03,151 --> 00:13:03,984 Don't you talk to Tom that way! 381 00:13:03,984 --> 00:13:06,280 - Oh no, it's okay, Gertrude. 382 00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:08,270 You have a wonderful boy, here. 383 00:13:08,270 --> 00:13:09,390 You should be very proud. 384 00:13:09,390 --> 00:13:10,920 - He's nothing compared to you. 385 00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:13,020 He is absolutely nothing. 386 00:13:13,020 --> 00:13:15,200 - All right, Mom, I think it's time for Tom to go now. 387 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:16,105 Let's-- 388 00:13:16,105 --> 00:13:16,938 - You can't speak for Tom. 389 00:13:16,938 --> 00:13:18,070 - Oh, you know what? 390 00:13:18,070 --> 00:13:20,390 Your boy is right, I do you, I have to run, 391 00:13:20,390 --> 00:13:22,960 but it was so nice meeting you. 392 00:13:22,960 --> 00:13:27,070 - Oh, you have just made my day. 393 00:13:27,070 --> 00:13:29,000 Oh, my year. 394 00:13:29,890 --> 00:13:32,094 - Really glad to hear that, it was so nice meeting you. 395 00:13:32,094 --> 00:13:34,358 - Oh, well it was so nice meeting you. 396 00:13:34,358 --> 00:13:36,990 And you have a great birthday next month. 397 00:13:36,990 --> 00:13:38,744 - You know I will, thank you so much. 398 00:13:38,744 --> 00:13:40,233 - I knew it! 399 00:13:40,233 --> 00:13:42,710 You're not Tom Cruise! 400 00:13:42,710 --> 00:13:45,680 Tom Cruise's birthday was three months ago! 401 00:13:45,680 --> 00:13:48,030 You get out, you imposter! 402 00:13:48,030 --> 00:13:52,280 I knew it the moment I smelled that cheap cologne 403 00:13:52,280 --> 00:13:54,510 you were wearing, Tom would never! 404 00:13:54,510 --> 00:13:55,768 Sean! - Yes! 405 00:13:55,768 --> 00:13:57,730 - Who did you let in our house? 406 00:13:57,730 --> 00:13:59,733 - I don't know, Mom, I don't know! 407 00:13:59,733 --> 00:14:01,440 - Gertrude, Gertrude. 408 00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:02,940 I assure you, I am Tom Cruise. 409 00:14:02,940 --> 00:14:04,660 I'm sorry, I didn't hear what you said. 410 00:14:04,660 --> 00:14:05,660 I'm operating on cruise control-- 411 00:14:05,660 --> 00:14:06,493 - Imposter! 412 00:14:06,493 --> 00:14:07,592 Get out! - Get out! 413 00:14:07,592 --> 00:14:09,229 - Get out! - Get out! 414 00:14:09,229 --> 00:14:10,334 - Help me, help you. 415 00:14:10,334 --> 00:14:11,834 Help me, help you. 416 00:14:13,223 --> 00:14:14,800 Gertrude, come on. 417 00:14:14,800 --> 00:14:15,799 Show me the money. 418 00:14:15,799 --> 00:14:17,080 - Go dig a hole. - Leave. 419 00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:20,310 - And this is why I'm not gonna do my impression for you. 420 00:14:20,310 --> 00:14:21,143 I'm sorry. 421 00:14:21,143 --> 00:14:22,880 I'm sure you're a good person, but I'm not 422 00:14:22,880 --> 00:14:26,770 a performing monkey, when you put me in pressure situations 423 00:14:26,770 --> 00:14:31,150 like this to perform perfectly for a high-stress, 424 00:14:31,150 --> 00:14:34,760 high-stakes situation, bad things happen. 425 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:37,780 So, no I'm sorry the answer is no. 426 00:14:37,780 --> 00:14:39,180 I'm not gonna do it for you. 427 00:14:40,720 --> 00:14:45,510 Unless of course it's like a professional, paying gig. 428 00:14:49,863 --> 00:14:51,670 - From the bustling streets of New York City to the hills 429 00:14:51,670 --> 00:14:53,760 of San Francisco, we are not as divided 430 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,223 as our politics suggest. 431 00:14:55,223 --> 00:14:57,659 We're one nation, one people. 432 00:14:57,659 --> 00:15:00,267 There are no red states or blue states. 433 00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:04,293 We're the United States, with liberty and justice for all. 434 00:15:04,293 --> 00:15:05,920 Thank you, so much. 435 00:15:07,650 --> 00:15:08,881 - What do we do? 436 00:15:08,881 --> 00:15:10,240 - I don't know. 437 00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:12,690 I have never seen two crackups happen 438 00:15:12,690 --> 00:15:14,040 at the same time like this. 439 00:15:15,799 --> 00:15:17,870 I hate myself for thinking this, but what 440 00:15:17,870 --> 00:15:19,115 if it's contagious? 441 00:15:19,115 --> 00:15:20,400 - Hey, what's going on, guys? 442 00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:21,233 - No, no, no, no! 443 00:15:21,233 --> 00:15:22,220 Don't get any closer. 444 00:15:22,220 --> 00:15:23,304 - What? 445 00:15:23,304 --> 00:15:24,137 What's going on? 446 00:15:24,137 --> 00:15:25,230 - Bianca can't do impressions, Reggie's stuck 447 00:15:25,230 --> 00:15:26,664 in the president. 448 00:15:26,664 --> 00:15:28,570 - He's stuck in the president? 449 00:15:28,570 --> 00:15:30,750 See, I told you, you have to be careful. 450 00:15:30,750 --> 00:15:31,770 It gets in your head. 451 00:15:31,770 --> 00:15:32,750 I'm gonna go talk to them. 452 00:15:32,750 --> 00:15:34,497 - No, no, Jim thinks it might be contagious. 453 00:15:34,497 --> 00:15:36,170 - Contagious? 454 00:15:36,170 --> 00:15:38,290 - I was just putting it out there. 455 00:15:38,290 --> 00:15:39,290 - That's ridiculous. 456 00:15:42,358 --> 00:15:44,850 Hey guys. 457 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,560 What seems to be the problem? 458 00:15:48,560 --> 00:15:51,260 - I'll tell you what the problem is, the problem is 459 00:15:51,260 --> 00:15:52,920 that you guys are so concerned about winning 460 00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:54,320 that you've completely forgotten 461 00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:56,060 that you guys can help each other. 462 00:15:56,060 --> 00:15:57,730 Okay, guess why I'm living here. 463 00:15:57,730 --> 00:15:58,563 Guess. 464 00:15:58,563 --> 00:15:59,710 Do you think it's the outdoor couch? 465 00:15:59,710 --> 00:16:01,100 No, it is very cozy, though. 466 00:16:01,100 --> 00:16:02,300 Do you think it's the pool? 467 00:16:02,300 --> 00:16:04,234 That it's always a perfect 81 degrees temperature? 468 00:16:04,234 --> 00:16:05,470 No. 469 00:16:05,470 --> 00:16:07,670 Do you think it's the water pressure, which is amazing 470 00:16:07,670 --> 00:16:08,503 by the way. 471 00:16:08,503 --> 00:16:10,950 It is like an affectionate fire hose, it's incredible. 472 00:16:10,950 --> 00:16:11,783 No. 473 00:16:11,783 --> 00:16:13,330 - I want to be around the impression guys. 474 00:16:13,330 --> 00:16:15,984 I want to learn how to do Ross' John C. Reilly, 475 00:16:15,984 --> 00:16:18,790 or Jim's Sir Ian McKellen. 476 00:16:18,790 --> 00:16:20,530 And icing on the cake, 'cause you guys are friends 477 00:16:20,530 --> 00:16:23,010 with Bianca and Reggie and Peyote. 478 00:16:23,010 --> 00:16:23,990 - It's Piotr. - It's Piotr. 479 00:16:23,990 --> 00:16:24,823 That's his real name. 480 00:16:24,823 --> 00:16:26,070 - Sure any of us could win this thing. 481 00:16:26,070 --> 00:16:27,150 We could win a lot of money. 482 00:16:27,150 --> 00:16:28,680 We could win a lot of money. 483 00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:31,180 But money does not buy you friends. 484 00:16:31,180 --> 00:16:32,440 Friendship is earned. 485 00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:35,700 If you want to buy something, buy a new bathtub. 486 00:16:42,952 --> 00:16:44,723 - What's just happened? 487 00:16:44,723 --> 00:16:47,430 Seriously, what was that? 488 00:16:47,430 --> 00:16:51,190 - Boy, that Hundo character is a real maverick 489 00:16:51,190 --> 00:16:53,690 from real America, you betcha. 490 00:16:53,690 --> 00:16:55,480 - Boy, that felt so good. 491 00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:57,846 - For the record, I was actually gonna say something 492 00:16:57,846 --> 00:17:00,010 very similar to that. 493 00:17:00,010 --> 00:17:01,740 - Seriously, though, we do need to do something 494 00:17:01,740 --> 00:17:02,573 about that bathtub. 495 00:17:02,573 --> 00:17:03,406 It backs up. 496 00:17:03,406 --> 00:17:05,147 I'll call a few contractors, okay? 497 00:17:05,147 --> 00:17:06,990 - Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. 498 00:17:06,990 --> 00:17:09,220 Before we officially begin, I think we should have 499 00:17:09,220 --> 00:17:12,487 a few words from Academy Award winner Monique. 500 00:17:12,487 --> 00:17:16,850 - Thank ya, thank ya for coming tonight. 501 00:17:16,850 --> 00:17:21,850 I'm gonna order you to turn off your cell phones. 502 00:17:22,174 --> 00:17:24,390 Penelope Cruz, she knows what's up. 503 00:17:24,390 --> 00:17:26,970 - Yes, I still do not own a cell phone. 504 00:17:26,970 --> 00:17:28,980 I prefer talking face to face. 505 00:17:28,980 --> 00:17:30,520 It is better. 506 00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:33,330 Ladies and gentlemen, we've got a fantastic show for you 507 00:17:33,330 --> 00:17:36,078 tonight with about a dozen performers, but, 508 00:17:36,078 --> 00:17:41,078 to start the show off right, one of my best friends, 509 00:17:41,110 --> 00:17:42,989 one of the most talented women you'll ever meet, 510 00:17:42,989 --> 00:17:46,019 the incomparable Bianca Miller. 511 00:17:48,634 --> 00:17:52,169 ♪ Sometimes you're asked to stand in line ♪ 512 00:17:52,169 --> 00:17:55,942 ♪ Wait your turn, give me mine ♪ 513 00:17:55,942 --> 00:18:00,311 ♪ Be what someone else defines, but ♪ 514 00:18:00,311 --> 00:18:03,651 ♪ Sometimes someone's wrong ♪ 515 00:18:03,651 --> 00:18:06,930 ♪ Sometimes someone's wrong ♪ 516 00:18:06,930 --> 00:18:07,809 - Barbara Streisand. 517 00:18:07,809 --> 00:18:10,041 ♪ Walk where he's tread ♪ 518 00:18:10,041 --> 00:18:12,072 ♪ Step in her shoe ♪ 519 00:18:12,072 --> 00:18:15,260 ♪ Somebody tell you you've never been blue ♪ 520 00:18:15,260 --> 00:18:16,093 - Norah Jones. 521 00:18:16,093 --> 00:18:19,473 ♪ Someone thinks he understands you, but ♪ 522 00:18:19,473 --> 00:18:22,193 ♪ Sometimes someone's wrong ♪ 523 00:18:22,193 --> 00:18:23,527 - Adele. 524 00:18:23,527 --> 00:18:26,663 ♪ Oh, sometimes someone's wrong ♪ 525 00:18:26,663 --> 00:18:29,458 - Julie Andrews. 526 00:18:29,458 --> 00:18:32,825 ♪ Do that or if you fail the test ♪ 527 00:18:32,825 --> 00:18:34,092 ♪ Don't sweat ♪ 528 00:18:34,092 --> 00:18:36,700 ♪ What said by all the rest ♪ 529 00:18:36,700 --> 00:18:37,694 - Bernadette Peters. 530 00:18:37,694 --> 00:18:40,727 ♪ Don't worry when I'm second guessed ♪ 531 00:18:40,727 --> 00:18:43,696 ♪ Just do what you do best ♪ 532 00:18:43,696 --> 00:18:45,072 - Kristen Chenoweth. 533 00:18:45,072 --> 00:18:48,650 ♪ Just do what you do best ♪ 534 00:18:48,650 --> 00:18:50,219 - How about a little Zoe Deschanel? 535 00:18:50,219 --> 00:18:51,264 - Oh. 536 00:18:51,264 --> 00:18:54,470 ♪ Flower in that field out there ♪ 537 00:18:54,470 --> 00:18:58,370 ♪ We can't say do be do without care ♪ 538 00:18:58,370 --> 00:18:59,513 - Alanis. 539 00:18:59,513 --> 00:19:02,480 ♪ 'Cause blinders can't quite be compared ♪ 540 00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:05,649 ♪ To someone sometimes wrong, yeah ♪ 541 00:19:05,649 --> 00:19:09,368 ♪ Sometimes someone's wrong ♪ 542 00:19:09,368 --> 00:19:10,513 - Kelly Clarkson. 543 00:19:10,513 --> 00:19:14,052 ♪ Some might say it's been late at night ♪ 544 00:19:14,052 --> 00:19:18,014 ♪ Through when some pain gets all upright ♪ 545 00:19:18,014 --> 00:19:18,960 - Celine Dion. 546 00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:22,087 ♪ Against a world, all right let's climb ♪ 547 00:19:22,087 --> 00:19:25,201 ♪ But sometimes I get it wrong ♪ 548 00:19:25,201 --> 00:19:28,895 ♪ Sometimes I get it wrong ♪ 549 00:19:28,895 --> 00:19:30,055 - Christina Aguilera. 550 00:19:30,055 --> 00:19:31,981 ♪ Oh ♪ 551 00:19:31,981 --> 00:19:35,173 ♪ Don't matter if you fail the test ♪ 552 00:19:35,173 --> 00:19:36,110 - Liza Minnelli. 553 00:19:36,110 --> 00:19:38,925 ♪ Don't sweat what's said by all the rest ♪ 554 00:19:38,925 --> 00:19:39,826 - Dolly Parton. 555 00:19:39,826 --> 00:19:43,179 ♪ Don't worry when I'm second guessed ♪ 556 00:19:43,179 --> 00:19:45,734 ♪ Just do what you do best ♪ 557 00:19:45,734 --> 00:19:47,043 - Judy Garland. 558 00:19:47,043 --> 00:19:50,036 ♪ Just do what you do best ♪ 559 00:19:50,036 --> 00:19:51,672 - Take it home, Bianca! 560 00:19:51,672 --> 00:19:54,716 ♪ Don't matter if you fail the test ♪ 561 00:19:54,716 --> 00:19:58,402 ♪ Don't sweat what's said by all the rest ♪ 562 00:19:58,402 --> 00:20:02,434 ♪ Don't you worry if you're second guessed ♪ 563 00:20:02,434 --> 00:20:06,011 ♪ Just do what you do best ♪ 564 00:20:06,011 --> 00:20:10,061 ♪ Just do what you do best ♪ 565 00:20:10,061 --> 00:20:13,644 ♪ Just do what you do best ♪ 566 00:20:18,810 --> 00:20:20,559 - Ladies and gentlemen, Ms. Bianca Miller. 567 00:20:29,550 --> 00:20:31,300 - On the next Impress Me. 568 00:20:31,300 --> 00:20:32,783 - This can't be Piotr's house. 569 00:20:32,783 --> 00:20:33,960 - Piotr's museum. 570 00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:35,900 - He made a YouTube video from prison. 571 00:20:35,900 --> 00:20:37,130 - Californians. 572 00:20:37,130 --> 00:20:40,860 - I like take the 118 to 215, take that across the 10. 573 00:20:40,860 --> 00:20:43,653 - Regardless of what happens at the competition. 574 00:20:43,653 --> 00:20:44,710 You got it! 575 00:20:48,469 --> 00:20:51,052 ♪ Soul Pancake ♪ 41311

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