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Original Subs: Uncredited Resync and Correction: Samizdata
I need some fuel.
I need some fuel.
Propane or kerosene?
Kerosene.
I only got a few liters left.
Put the rest of the kero
in the man's scooter out there, Scratch.
Ha ha ha!
Sick guy.
It's the ultraviolet.
His noodle is fried.
I can't keep him out of the sun.
You work for UNICOM, huh?
Yeah.
How far is that station from here?
You got business with Old Man Hooks?
He loves you UNiboys.
That's about 40 Miles from here.
Got any dried food?
I'll take a look.
Temperatures continue to rise throughout the Southwest.
Some thermal squalls have been reported.
The ozone depletion continues.
UNICOM officials have reiterated the mandatory use
of cool suits outside at all times.
This just in...
Three more members
of the Independent Liberty Union
were arrested yesterday by Fresno Police.
UNICOM officials said
the ringleaders were using reconstructed computers
to communicate with another like-minded group
in the Midwest.
This is the fifth time in as many months
I.L.U. Members were arrested.
UNICOM officials have asserted
that all such dissident groups
have been ferreted out and eradicated.
You know, that's not what's really going on.
I don't care what the company says.
This Liberty movement is getting stronger.
Company officials have expressed to me privately
they're having one heck of a time ferreting out...
All I got is this snake jerky, huh?
No, thanks.
How much for the kerosene?
Oh, make it 30 even.
Thanks a lot.
Mm-hmm.
Keep cool, buckaroo.
Huh... huh.
Sh-sure is...
Bitch-o machine you got here, man.
You really ought to go inside.
Why?
The ultraviolet.
It's burning you up.
Why?
Are you Batman?
No.
See you around, kid.
See you around, kid.
[MOANING AND HEAVY BREATHING]
Well, my goodness.
You actually look as if you're enjoying this.
He's not minding it too much himself.
If your mother was only to see this.
This is like put another quarter in
and take a ride.
This is disgusting.
How can you look at yourselves in the mirror?
Right, audience?
I feel just fine about myself.
I provide a service for troubled and lonely men,
and I'm proud of it.
I'm healthy and clean
and very good at what I do.
Oh, honey, I bet you are.
Time for another call. This is Winston Wicket.
You are on the line.
Hello.
Hello.
Is that really you, Winston?
Yeah, it's really me, you desert dipshit.
Turn your monitor down.
Sorry.
You certainly are sorry. What is it?
I just want to say
I don't think human prosties are worth a broke dick.
And why is that, caller?
They ain't as pretty as the synthoid prosties were.
They ain't as good, either.
Hold on, now. What do you mean, not as... good?
Let's just say the synthoid prosties were more agile
and cleaner, too.
All them weird diseases came back
when we had to use human whores.
Winston?
Are you listening to me?
Lady, how exactly do you know
how good you really are?
Is this some sort of assessment you took yourself?
I don't have to be told how good I am.
I know how good I am.
Maybe you haven't had a human for a long time.
That's a cheap shot.
This show's a cheap shot.
Let me tell you something.
Nobody talks to Winston Wicket like that.
Young fella?
Is there something I can do for you?
Yeah. You, uh...
Lathan Hooks?
That's me.
Tyson Keen.
From UNICOM.
Well, you tell Big Brother, whatever it is,
I ain't interested.
Big Brother just brought you 6 liters of freon.
Listen, I'm sick and tired of you UNICOM regionals
coming out here whenever you got nothing better to do.
Breathing down my neck,
telling me how to run my business.
Know what you ought to do?
Tell your bosses to worry less
about what happens out here in the Wasteland
and more about those big business shits in Washington.
I'm not breathing down anybody's back.
I'm just making a buck.
There are no bucks to be made out here, fella.
I do need that stuff.
Been out of backup so long, I forgot I ordered it.
Like you forgot you promised me an audience
and cameraman?
When will I get them?
When pigs fly, Winston.
Get that stuff in here.
Could you hold the camera a bit steadier?
We're starting to look like an amateur hour.
Whatever you say, your assholiness.
Look, Arren, I need a bit of an advance.
I promised these two bimbos dinner.
Yeah? What did they promise you?
You got a sick mind...
You little drip.
What did you do to piss off my grandfather?
I said I worked for UNICOM.
That'll do it every time.
You don't look like a corporate geek.
The company needed somebody who knows bikes.
This job is not what I expected.
After this, I'm moving on.
This place is like a museum.
It's an old power station.
UNICOM fired everyone and left it to rot.
Lathan did this.
He did?
Yeah. Well, I modified a lot.
I patched together some stuff from the junkyard outside.
I'd better get that freon.
My name's Arren.
What's yours?
Tyson.
When it gets still like this,
it means thermal's going to hit.
Stay until it passes.
That would be two or three days.
I wouldn't want to overstay my welcome.
Jesus Christ.
Is that what I think?
It's a DV-8.
Back when they really made them big.
How did it get all the way out here?
The government scrapped them.
When the Mexican uranium mines went dry,
they just dumped them.
There's probably more out here.
Really?
It must have been a sight
to see this old guy in action.
Long before I was born.
Somebody's been messing with the cortex.
Oh... me.
I was trying to see if it was still operable.
That's against the law.
So shoot me.
Your parents got more like you?
No. My parents are dead.
It's just Lathan and me.
I'm sorry.
So, how did you and the old man
end up in the Wasteland?
It's a long story.
It can't be that long.
You're not that old.
I'm 16.
And never been kissed.
Maybe I'll take you up on that offer
and stay a while.
Thanks.
OK, that's Lathan's room over there,
and that's mine.
Our handyman sleeps on the next floor down.
Come on. I'll show you.
What else is on the third level?
There's a kitchen and medical clinic.
This place goes on forever.
I want you to meet Quinn.
He's Lathan's engineer and all-around handyman.
You'll probably be bunking with him.
Good afternoon, boys and girls...
Hi, Quinn.
Yesterday's lesson on global economics.
Um, open your textbooks to page...
I'll show you where his room is.
So, kids, the two primary causes
of the last century's economic catastrophe were...
Uncontrolled computer stock selling causing worldwide panic...
Who's that?
Parice is the schoolteacher here.
Correct. And the result was...
Cary, are you with us?
Yeah, I'm here, teacher.
Nine governments couldn't pay their national debts,
so UNICOM took over responsibility.
Good. Right.
And it can't happen again because... why?
Because, um...
Because UNICOM is a free enterprise bureaucracy
dedicated to the concepts of life, liberty,
and the pursuit of economic stability.
Awful pretty for a schoolteacher.
I guess.
If you like the type.
Take a look at chapter 4, page 15.
Cary, go ahead and read aloud for us.
So, Mr. Keen,
where are you from originally?
Oceanside originally.
My name's Tyson.
I've never seen the ocean.
I have.
Do people still swim in it?
A few. Now and then.
I've always wondered what I'd look like
in one of those bikinis women used to wear.
You wouldn't catch me dead wearing one.
'Cause you're not grown up enough to fill one out yet.
Very funny, Quinn.
Sorry I'm late.
Mr. Keen,
my granddaughter says I owe you an apology.
I suppose I do.
You caught me at a bad time.
You mean there's a good time?
I've been around a long time.
I lived through the Days of Redemption.
They say we're redeemed now.
Well, things could be worse.
Mr. Keen, when UNICOM decided
to ban the use of computers by civilians
because, as they say,
we screwed up the money markets,
we triggered the econo-collapse.
We bought that.
We didn't like it, but we bought it
because it was the easiest thing to do.
And when they outlawed robots
because of some demented vision
about the Book of Revelations,
we thanked them for guiding us
out of the darkness.
Lathan.
But nothing much has changed.
Except we've lost a couple of our civil rights.
We're still as uneducated as ever
and self-absorbed.
We're still watching the same crap on television.
No offense, Mr. Hooks,
but the Winston Wicket show
ain't exactly brilliant programming.
That jackass' uncle
holds the mortgage on this station.
That's why we have
the Winston Wicket show on television.
Even in absentia, I'm the topic of conversation.
What are you doing back here?
Motels were filled.
With a thermal coming, we figured we'd come back.
Great.
I promised these two fallen women a nice dinner.
Sandra. Christie.
Have everything you want.
It's on the house.
We've got to make up our own beds!
Parice, you'll be bunking in my room.
And, Winston, Lathan said you guys get the clinic.
And don't touch anything.
I'm not going to touch anything.
Ha ha ha ha.
Come on downstairs, girls.
We're going to play doctor.
I'll get the spare cot.
Night, Arren.
Night, Quinn.
Good night.
Sleep well.
If you need anything, I'm right here.
Thanks, kid.
He seems really nice.
I guess.
If you like the type.
So how long you worked here?
About six months.
That's a tough old man.
Yeah, he's hard, but he's fair.
What did you do before this?
Odd jobs here and there.
Same here.
No matter what it is,
as long as it pays.
Good night.
Good night.
It's all yours.
Come on, ladies.
This will be a night you will not forget
for a long, long time.
It's a friggin' hospital.
I wonder what kind of mind-fuckers they got.
Hey, Christie, come on.
Remember what we agreed.
OK?
Why is all this here?
It's an emergency room for the desert shits.
There a doctor here?
A UNiquack comes out regularly,
shoots them up with medicine,
and they're good as new.
[CREAKING]
[LOUD THUMP]
[CLANG]
[THUMPING]
[BEEP BEEP]
[FOOTSTEPS]
You scared the hell out of me.
I was, uh...
I was just checking this...
Aah!
Aah!
Aah!
Aah!
[ALARM BLARES]
What is that?
Arren!
Shut up, you idiot!
[ALARM BLARING]
What the hell's going on?
Electricity's out.
Air's down.
Sensors warn when it's over 105.
What the hell is that?
Juice is out, that's all.
Lathan's not in his room.
He's probably been messing around again,
shorted out the power source.
Lathan.
Lathan!
Maybe he's in the trans room.
I'll go with you.
Oh, this is great...
The old bastard has blown a fuse
in the middle of a thermal,
and we're going to roast.
Lathan.
Lathan.
Ah, there's some major damage here.
This isn't good.
Where the hell could he be?
Aah!
Arren! They killed him!
They killed him! Arren!
They killed him! It wasn't an accident!
Listen to me.
No, they killed him!
It's OK.
It's all right. I know.
It's OK, sweetheart.
It's all right.
It's OK.
What happened?
I don't know. Must've slipped off the catwalk.
Could've been a heart attack. How's the kid?
She's pretty shook up.
Well, this is a fine kettle of snatch.
We're going to be roasting in this furnace.
You're an asshole.
Leave your hands off me.
You're worried about the heat?
That's not going to make it any cooler in here.
If the thermal continues
and we can't get the spark on, we'll fry.
It's 110 degrees now,
and it's going to get much hotter when the sun rises.
What about auxiliary power?
We've got about an hour left.
Why don't you do something out of the ordinary?
Do what you're paid for.
Why don't you just fix it, huh?
So, can we fix it?
Maybe. We could try to rig a power bypass,
but we got to go outside to do it.
How is she?
As well as expected.
She says the old man was murdered.
She's in shock. I gave her something to help her sleep.
We're going to rig a power bypass.
In the meantime, maybe you can find some kerosene lanterns.
Better suit up.
He didn't fall.
He was jamming their signal.
They killed him.
What?
Don't let them get away with it.
Arren, who?
UNICOM.
Arren.
Is she all right?
Yeah.
Quinn's waiting for you outside.
Oh.
Be careful, OK?
I will.
Don't touch anything in here.
Hold the light steady.
No water.
Why not?
The pump's electric.
If this thermal continues, we'll die without water.
You mean to tell me
there are no emergency supplies?
Damn fool.
There's got to be something here.
Christie, check the cupboards for soups,
any other kind of liquids.
Toilets!
Good idea.
OK.
Winston. That's your job.
What?
Oh, come on.
Don't tell me you never drank from a toilet.
You're a well-rounded guy.
OK, if you're going to be a spoilsport,
we'll boil it, OK?
Yeah, boil this.
How much longer?
I almost got it.
Lord, I have just looked into the abyss.
At least the last son of a bitch flushed.
What is all this?
[FAUCET RUNNING]
Oh, here's to big strong men.
I must've inhaled a pound of sand.
Is there anything I can do for you?
Uh... I'm OK.
Well, is everything fixed?
Yeah, until the thermal passes.
We have to rewire the whole thing.
I just looked in on the kid,
to see if she's OK. She wasn't there.
I looked everywhere. She's gone.
Arren?
She's not there.
You OK?
Yeah, yeah, I'm OK.
Come on. I'll help find her.
This place is starting to give me the willies.
Relax. It's a lot better
than some of the places we've been in.
There's something weird going on. I can feel it.
Soon as the thermal passes, we'll head up to Frisco.
What about the money Mr. Wicket owes us?
That fat fucker's a deadbeat.
I say we cut our losses and kiss his ass goodbye.
He said he was going to make me a TV star.
Come on. Let's go find the kid.
Arren?
Arren? You down here?
Arren?
Arren?
Oh, come on, you little twit.
This ain't funny.
Arren?
Come on, baby.
Arren, don't do this.
Come on. If you're in here, let me know.
Arren?
Come on, honey.
Aah! Why did you sneak up on me?
What are you doing here?
I need a drink.
I need a drink.
Shh! Follow me. I want to show you something.
Where did all this stuff come from?
Lathan did it during the Days of Redemption.
It's all stuff from the nineties.
What do you guys use it for?
Ah! Ow! Jesus, what the hell are you doing?
Oh, God, I'm sorry. I had to see if you were a synth.
Are you nuts? The synths were destroyed years ago.
No, UNICOM's been using them for over a year.
Lathan and the others found out
when one infiltrated the group.
Wait. What? What group?
The Independent Liberty Union.
Your grandfather belonged to the I.L.U.?
So what do they use synthoids for?
Watchdogs.
To watch...
Us.
They're programming them on a UHF frequency.
Lathan found a way to jam the signal.
It was only a matter of time before they traced it
and sent a rubber geek to stop it.
That's why they killed him.
At first, I thought it was you,
but Lathan said you were harmless.
What we didn't figure on was one already being here.
Yeah, but Arren, by international agreement,
synthoids are programmed to be
incapable of killing humans.
Any synth can kill you if you override its fail-safe program
with a crash and burn virus.
That's what they were broadcasting.
When I came down here,
there was all sorts of stuff happening on the screen.
It was the virus programmed just before Lathan was killed.
[COMPUTER BEEPING]
There.
That's the synthoid's I.D. Number.
That's us.
That's the crash and burn virus.
And that's my grandfather's social security number.
So what's F.L.R. 101?
First Law of Robotics. Deleting it.
Creating a killing machine.
Tyson, I'm sorry I cut you.
I guess I knew you weren't a synth.
There's things that don't add up here, though.
What about that room
and all the emergency supplies
stashed where nobody can get them?
Someone must've moved them there.
What about the freon? There's 10 liters there.
Your grandpa said you'd been out for months.
One of us ain't one of us.
I'm going to find out which one.
This is the craziest thing I've ever heard.
I saw the computer.
All that means is that little shit's going to jail
as soon as they find out.
This whole thing's absurd.
Why?
I mean, anything's possible.
Well, we all know each other.
Except them.
And me.
I saw him bleed.
Can we just get on with this, please?
Besides, what difference does it make
if one of us isn't real?
Exactly. If a synthoid did kill the old man,
it got what it wanted.
Why would we still be targets?
What if it's programmed
to kill anything it sees as a threat?
We all know it's here. It's probably enough.
Well, you all deserve to know for yourselves.
I'll go first.
You're getting better at that, kid.
I'll go next.
Piece of cake.
Who's next?
I got nothing to lose.
I'll go next.
If I can't trust you, who can I?
I'll do it.
Is that red enough for you?
I need another drink before you play doctor.
Why must it be this way?
I mean...
Ladies first.
Aah!
Fuck! Jesus Christ! Quinn, you asshole!
You think everything's a joke.
Jesus!
I guess that leaves me.
I told you this was a crazy idea.
You ought to be locked up, you little cretin!
All this I.L.U. bullshit!
She's as crazy as the old man!
For Christ's sake, she just lost her grandfather.
So it's OK to slice and dice me?
Jesus, look at this. It's already starting to swell up.
Son of a bitch, you infected me!
When this thermal's over,
I'm going to call the Rangers
and tell them where they can find an illegal computer.
Little girls like you go over well in prison.
It's all right, kid. We all make mistakes.
Well, it's after 2:00.
I'm going to get some sleep.
See you in the morning.
I'm having some tea. Anybody want to join me?
Yeah, I'm going to stay up a little while.
Good night.
Well, I'm going to bed.
I'll be in Lathan's room. It's more secure.
I don't know. I just...
Can't picture Lathan in the I.L.U.
He liked to think of himself as a revolutionary,
but he was really more of a dreamer than a doer.
Whiskey?
No. No, thanks.
What about the computer?
That was a surprise.
The Rangers will have to figure that one out.
So why do you live in this Wasteland?
The same reason most people do, I guess.
Everything went under glass
when the ocean air got toxic,
and even with these thermals,
I couldn't live that way.
Yeah.
It's a hell of a world we live in.
Yeah.
What? What's wrong?
It's just been a long time since someone held me.
Jesus Christ, look at this thing.
Ow.
Jesus Christ.
Ow! Fuck!
Jesus.
They finally got to you.
Good boy.
Don't let them figure you out.
[FOOTSTEPS]
Tyson?
Tyson?
Tyson, is that you?
[FOOTSTEPS RECEDING]
Hi. Aah!
Quinn!
Let her go.
I can snap her neck like a twig.
You do, and I'll blow your fucking microchips
all over this floor.
Suit yourself.
Ow.
Aah!
Where are you going?
I got to thank you, kid.
You said a synth would try to destroy anything
it thought threatened it.
I wasn't programmed for that.
They just told me to get the old man,
but as soon as you said it,
I saw the sense in the idea.
You see, there's a teeny tiny little chip
in my big gargantuan brain.
The company calls it the Jiminy factor...
'cause it's like a conscience.
It's kind of cute, huh?
But I would never
in a million, billion, trillion years
terminate a human.
But thanks to a miracle of modern technology...
Poor little Jiminy cricket...
Has crashed...
[STOMP]
...and burned.
So now there's only one mission left...
...to protect the company's synthoid program
from any outside interference.
And you two...
...with your Goddamn questions
and unpatriotic opinions...
...have definitely interfered.
So...
We're going to have some fun.
How about a little...
...hide and seek?
Tyson, how did you know it was Quinn?
The cut on Wicket's hand swelled up way too fast.
Coolant's lethal in the blood.
Quinn slashed him right after he used it.
That hidden coolant?
That's his blood supply.
We got to get the others and get out.
Are there any more guns?
Yeah, the I.L.U. gave Lathan some.
I know where it is.
We should stick together.
I can watch out for myself,
now that I know what I'm watching out for.
Where'd you get that?
Quinn tried to kill us.
Tyson's waiting for you in the studio.
I'll get the others.
Sandra!
Sandra... the synth... It's Quinn.
Where's Winston and Christie?
I don't know.
Get to the studio. I'll find them.
Watch out for Quinn.
That's an ugly sore you got there.
You scared me shitless, sneaking up like that.
Someone should take a look at that.
This thing's making me scared.
It started as a small cut.
I never seen anything this Goddamn infected.
You think you got problems.
Take a look at this.
Jesus Christ.
Where you going, fat boy?
I thought we'd whip up a batch of cookies.
That... that... that...
That's all, folks!
Uh! Uh!
Uh-oh.
It's way too late for a doctor.
Quinn! Uh! Uh!
I think we'd better amputate.
Aah!
You know, stumps?
Your friend did me a favor
when he shot up my circuits.
He improved something.
Know what that is?
My sense of fun!
Ohh.
He got Winston.
What?
Christ.
Sandra, I couldn't find her.
Hey, but maybe that means he won't either.
[COCKS GUN]
Guess who.
Well, your hands aren't as large as Winston's.
Say something else.
What do you want me to say?
Tell me that you like me.
I like you, Christie.
Don't look.
Keep your eyes closed.
Ahh, ahh...
Ahh.
Ahh.
Aah!
Oh, my God! Oh, God!
Aah!
What do we do if we get him?
Try to get broadcast power back up.
Let the world know what's going on down here.
It's not just here.
Well, maybe we should contact UNICOM.
Why can't you see where that would get us?
You're supposed to be the smart one here.
Take it easy, all right?
Shit.
He just wants to play with us.
We'll be OK if we hold him off till morning.
Then Christie and I are out of here.
Aah!
Aah! Ohh...
You guys...
Take Christie with you.
And...
...tell her I said goodbye.
I stopped at a roadside
40 Miles east of here.
Is that the closest place?
Those heaps outside still run?
Let's get Christie and get out of here.
The heat will kill us by noon.
So we'll have to do it before then.
You got a photocam here?
Lathan had one.
Get it.
Get some pictures of that thing,
then meet us outside. All right?
Let's go.
Come on, Arren. Let's go.
Here.
[ENGINE FALTERS]
Come on. Come on!
[ENGINE STARTS]
Hang on.
What's the rush?
Aah!
Arren!
Watch out!
Watch out!
Aah! Aah!
[THUNDER]
Tyson, look out!
Tyson!
Tyson!
Tyson!
Tyson!
Tyson!
Arren!
Oh, my God. Tyson!
Uh... uhh.
Uhh...
Uhh.
Tyson, we'll get you out.
What will you do?
Resurrect the dead.
Help me with this.
I'll get the DV-8 going.
Lathan made a circuit unit for my computer.
But the electricity's out.
The power pack will get the main frame going.
It took months of training to walk a DV-8.
I've been training.
Don't worry, Tyson. We'll get you out.
Come on. Get up.
Uh!
Damn it.
Aargh!
Ah!
Sorry, old fella.
Let's see.
Oh, man...
That's going to need some stitches.
Let's find Arren and get out of here.
OK.
Arren!
Something's not right.
Where the hell is she?
Arren?
Arren?
Don't you want to kiss me just one last time?
Hey!
Kiss this.
[SIREN]
Ha ha!
Hey.
Wonder what the hell they're up to.
Probably some pileup on the interstate.
See you around, Scratch.
Where y'all headed?
Dateland.
Lathan wants me to pick him up something.
Ah? How's that old renegade?
Better than ever these days.
Be seeing you, Bud.
Take care.
I guess they figured out
that their electronic flunkies got terminated.
Yeah.
So where now?
You know where I.L.U. Headquarters is?
Yeah. Bakersfield.
OK.
I'll get them those pictures
of the synthoids you shot.
You can help them set up broadcast facilities.
UNICOM's word won't be worth shit.
Is there another way to get to Bakersfield
besides the main highway?
There's a dirt turnoff about a half mile up.
Comes out just this side of Long Pine.
You all right?
Yeah. I'm just thinking about Lathan.
Guess I'm a little scared.
You're not the only one.
I just wish he could have seen
that old rust bucket walk.
He would've been proud.
You kind of liked her, didn't you?
Well, she was only going to break your heart...
...right after she ripped it out.
Captions copyright ยฉ 1990 Full Moon Entertainment
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