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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:53,604 --> 00:00:56,664 That wasn't a store robbery. 2 00:00:56,741 --> 00:00:58,732 That was an assassination. 3 00:00:58,810 --> 00:01:01,904 That wasn't a clerk. That was a wise guy. 4 00:01:01,979 --> 00:01:05,073 How do I know? 5 00:01:05,149 --> 00:01:08,812 I spent a little time with the FBI's organized crime unit. 6 00:01:08,886 --> 00:01:11,047 You could say that I'm intimately knowledgeable... 7 00:01:11,122 --> 00:01:13,522 with the rancorous workings of the Mob... 8 00:01:13,591 --> 00:01:16,025 in the midwest section of this country. 9 00:01:16,094 --> 00:01:19,689 I know gangland slayings, and that's exactly what this is. 10 00:01:19,764 --> 00:01:23,131 I'd look into it personally, but I got a date tonight. 11 00:01:24,268 --> 00:01:27,465 Think I'll take the private jet and fly to Spain, 12 00:01:27,538 --> 00:01:29,438 pick up the little lady, 13 00:01:29,507 --> 00:01:31,998 do the subsonic tummy bump at 30,000 feet... 14 00:01:32,076 --> 00:01:35,239 then glide back into the U.S. Of A. By dawn. 15 00:01:35,313 --> 00:01:39,716 I know what you're gonna say: "Jim Dodge, settle down. 16 00:01:39,784 --> 00:01:41,911 Relax. You owe it to yourself." 17 00:01:41,986 --> 00:01:44,750 I'll tell you what I tell everybody. 18 00:01:44,822 --> 00:01:47,882 Any little fr�ulein that expects anything more from me... 19 00:01:47,959 --> 00:01:49,984 than a little bit of pleasure, danger... 20 00:01:50,061 --> 00:01:52,120 and a great set of pectorals, 21 00:01:52,196 --> 00:01:54,790 she's looking for a fall right on her ass. 22 00:01:59,003 --> 00:02:01,972 - Hubie, Hubie! - Let me tell you something. 23 00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:05,440 If you know what's good for you, don't you ever come back! 24 00:02:06,377 --> 00:02:08,811 You're not gonna find someone who has the relationship... 25 00:02:08,880 --> 00:02:11,747 with those animals that I do. 26 00:02:11,816 --> 00:02:14,717 Listen to the dogs. They love me! 27 00:02:16,154 --> 00:02:19,214 It all started when I was 15. 28 00:02:19,290 --> 00:02:22,623 That's when I invented the artificial cow heart. 29 00:02:22,693 --> 00:02:25,526 Oh, that was a big thing. 30 00:02:25,596 --> 00:02:28,497 A little before your time, but it made the newspapers. 31 00:02:28,566 --> 00:02:31,592 ABC, NBC, CBS, they picked up on it. 32 00:02:31,669 --> 00:02:34,399 But it's more or less a hobby for me, boys. 33 00:02:35,640 --> 00:02:37,574 Scoot over! 34 00:02:39,444 --> 00:02:42,345 Actually, today I decided... 35 00:02:42,413 --> 00:02:47,373 I've gone about as far as I can go in the animal health-care business. 36 00:02:47,452 --> 00:02:51,445 The reason that I'm not at work this afternoon... 37 00:02:51,522 --> 00:02:55,151 is because I was made an offer I cannot refuse. I sold. 38 00:02:55,226 --> 00:02:57,126 Whatcha gonna do with the cash? 39 00:02:57,195 --> 00:03:00,392 Invest it overseas, projects in Eastern Europe. 40 00:03:00,465 --> 00:03:02,865 I don't know. I've got everything. 41 00:03:02,934 --> 00:03:06,028 Jim, you just bought the animal hospital. 42 00:03:06,103 --> 00:03:08,571 How come you sold it so fast? 43 00:03:10,174 --> 00:03:12,108 Tax problem. 44 00:03:12,176 --> 00:03:14,440 And here's my accountant right now. 45 00:03:14,512 --> 00:03:17,538 Earl, take a bow. Ha-ha-ha! 46 00:03:17,615 --> 00:03:20,584 20 minutes for lunch. Go buy another suit. 47 00:03:20,651 --> 00:03:22,710 He works for me. 48 00:03:22,787 --> 00:03:25,620 He's scouting some real estate for me, 49 00:03:25,690 --> 00:03:27,817 but the market's real tight. 50 00:03:30,895 --> 00:03:33,022 I like the new uniform, Lorraine. 51 00:03:35,166 --> 00:03:37,396 With the right shoes and handbag, 52 00:03:37,468 --> 00:03:39,902 that might be suitable for a cocktail party. 53 00:03:39,971 --> 00:03:42,701 So... question. 54 00:03:42,773 --> 00:03:45,799 When in the worid are you going to start serving sashimi? 55 00:03:45,877 --> 00:03:48,573 Maybe when I find out what it is. 56 00:03:50,348 --> 00:03:53,044 You've never heard of sashimi? 57 00:03:53,117 --> 00:03:55,608 You've got to be kidding. 58 00:03:55,686 --> 00:03:58,484 It's this special Japanese fish you eat raw. 59 00:03:58,556 --> 00:04:00,490 A little butter sauce, 60 00:04:00,558 --> 00:04:03,049 and you're ready to go to heaven. 61 00:04:03,127 --> 00:04:07,860 I'd hire you in a minute if I hadn't already fired you so many times. 62 00:04:07,932 --> 00:04:10,765 Did you ever think of leaving town? 63 00:04:12,637 --> 00:04:15,800 Thousands of people over in St. Louis... 64 00:04:15,873 --> 00:04:20,640 got no idea how full of shit you are. 65 00:04:20,711 --> 00:04:24,238 You've been alive for 21 years, my friend. 66 00:04:24,315 --> 00:04:26,249 Plenty of time for most people... 67 00:04:26,317 --> 00:04:28,649 to find a place for themselves. 68 00:04:30,288 --> 00:04:34,281 Well, I'm not like everybody else. 69 00:04:34,358 --> 00:04:37,384 - You know what I'm saying? - Yeah, that's for sure. 70 00:04:39,430 --> 00:04:41,898 How about if I... 71 00:04:41,966 --> 00:04:44,434 I work for you for free? 72 00:04:46,504 --> 00:04:48,972 No. 73 00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:51,065 I'm afraid not, Jimmy. 74 00:04:52,176 --> 00:04:54,644 Think about St. Louis. 75 00:04:56,013 --> 00:04:57,947 - Hey, Josie. - Hi. 76 00:04:58,015 --> 00:05:01,041 - Fill her up? - Fill her up. 77 00:05:19,103 --> 00:05:21,264 How you doin'? 78 00:05:38,289 --> 00:05:41,019 You got fired again, didn't you? Didn't you? 79 00:05:41,092 --> 00:05:43,151 Who told you that? 80 00:05:43,227 --> 00:05:47,823 - Hubie Marshall called me at work. - He called you at work? 81 00:05:47,898 --> 00:05:50,958 That's it, I'm gonna... What'd he say? 82 00:05:51,035 --> 00:05:52,969 He said he fired ya! 83 00:05:54,472 --> 00:05:56,406 He said that? And you believed him? 84 00:05:56,474 --> 00:05:58,567 Damn straight I do! 85 00:05:58,643 --> 00:06:01,908 With all due respect, Dad, you're Mr. Gullible. Sometimes. 86 00:06:03,648 --> 00:06:05,707 The truth of the matter is, Dad, I resigned. 87 00:06:06,984 --> 00:06:10,249 - I'll tell you something else. - Shut up, Jimmy! 88 00:06:10,321 --> 00:06:13,256 I had no idea the job was gonna be a hire/fire situation. 89 00:06:14,358 --> 00:06:16,758 Luther Betenhauser's boy is doing better. 90 00:06:16,827 --> 00:06:19,261 - What's wrong with him? - Fell off his grandfather's silo. 91 00:06:19,330 --> 00:06:22,493 - He's got brain damage. - He does not. 92 00:06:22,566 --> 00:06:26,093 Hoover Fey says his tongue's gonna hang out his mouth the rest of his life. 93 00:06:26,170 --> 00:06:27,933 And when he dies, 94 00:06:28,005 --> 00:06:30,530 at the funeral they're gonna put a mask on him. 95 00:06:30,608 --> 00:06:34,135 Do I have to listen to this while I'm eating? 96 00:06:34,211 --> 00:06:36,145 Let's talk about something else. 97 00:06:40,651 --> 00:06:42,516 Josie McClellan moved to New York. 98 00:06:43,988 --> 00:06:46,013 She did not. I saw her today. 99 00:06:46,090 --> 00:06:48,581 I don't know how you could. 100 00:06:48,659 --> 00:06:51,594 I heard she got tired of taking care of her father, 101 00:06:51,662 --> 00:06:54,028 and she told him to jump in a lake, 102 00:06:54,098 --> 00:06:56,293 and left to get her M.B.A. In high-fashion design... 103 00:06:56,367 --> 00:06:58,562 at the University of New York City. 104 00:06:59,437 --> 00:07:03,066 I just saw her at the gas station in living color. 105 00:07:03,140 --> 00:07:05,108 We had a cup of java together. 106 00:07:05,176 --> 00:07:09,306 I'm gonna take Lou Selby's word over yours any day. 107 00:07:09,380 --> 00:07:11,439 Lou Selby's a drunk. 108 00:07:13,617 --> 00:07:15,710 For a guy who's just lost his umpteenth job, 109 00:07:15,786 --> 00:07:18,253 you sure are handy with the tongue sword. 110 00:07:18,387 --> 00:07:22,448 - You got canned again? - Well, he didn't get canned. 111 00:07:23,458 --> 00:07:25,619 He got fired. 112 00:07:25,694 --> 00:07:27,719 That's gotta be a record. 113 00:07:31,933 --> 00:07:33,901 Not only are you an obnoxious slug, 114 00:07:33,969 --> 00:07:36,460 but you're a freeloading obnoxious slug. 115 00:07:36,538 --> 00:07:38,506 You should talk. 116 00:07:38,573 --> 00:07:40,837 In your mid-forties, still living at home. 117 00:07:42,411 --> 00:07:45,505 I'm twenty-four, and I pay rent. 118 00:07:45,580 --> 00:07:47,844 - So do I. - You did pay rent. 119 00:07:47,916 --> 00:07:52,148 Dad, you mean you're cutting my rent? 120 00:07:52,220 --> 00:07:54,450 Hell, no! 121 00:07:54,523 --> 00:07:57,492 You're not paying rent because you don't have a job or any money. 122 00:07:57,559 --> 00:08:00,221 You're out of school and you live in this house, you pay rent. 123 00:08:05,867 --> 00:08:08,768 # I wanna stay home # 124 00:08:10,705 --> 00:08:14,539 # I wanna stay home right here # 125 00:08:14,609 --> 00:08:18,636 # I wanna stay home today # 126 00:08:19,714 --> 00:08:22,376 Jim! Yo, Jim! 127 00:08:22,451 --> 00:08:24,578 Jim, wake up! 128 00:08:24,653 --> 00:08:26,746 Hey, get up! 129 00:08:28,090 --> 00:08:31,924 Get u-u-up! 130 00:08:32,794 --> 00:08:35,763 # When my day begins ## 131 00:08:35,831 --> 00:08:39,164 You know, getting this job, 132 00:08:39,234 --> 00:08:43,034 restoring your faith and pride in me is a number-1 priority. 133 00:08:43,105 --> 00:08:46,097 Priority ought to be making something of yourself. 134 00:08:46,174 --> 00:08:48,108 That's right up there. 135 00:08:48,176 --> 00:08:52,010 When I was your age, I couldn't wait to get out of my folks' house. 136 00:08:54,216 --> 00:08:55,615 I love living at home. 137 00:09:05,961 --> 00:09:09,124 I don't think this is such a great place for me to work. 138 00:09:11,967 --> 00:09:13,901 Okay, 139 00:09:13,969 --> 00:09:17,837 say I don't get this job, hypothetically. 140 00:09:17,906 --> 00:09:19,339 Are you gonna be upset? 141 00:09:19,407 --> 00:09:22,774 You don't get this job, you're on a bus to St. Louis. 142 00:09:22,844 --> 00:09:24,539 St. Louis? 143 00:09:24,613 --> 00:09:26,740 Uncle Jeff's offered you work in his garden shop. 144 00:09:26,815 --> 00:09:29,215 I don't know anything about gardening. 145 00:09:29,284 --> 00:09:31,582 You will learn! 146 00:09:31,653 --> 00:09:34,781 I'm getting a feeling that you want me out of your life. 147 00:09:34,856 --> 00:09:38,019 I don't want you out of my life, I want you out of my house. 148 00:09:39,561 --> 00:09:41,495 - Wow. - Out! 149 00:09:41,563 --> 00:09:43,258 Okay, okay, okay. 150 00:09:58,914 --> 00:10:03,476 - Sure I can't offer you a bear claw? - No, thanks. 151 00:10:03,552 --> 00:10:07,044 - They're good, fresh. - No, I'm fine. 152 00:10:07,122 --> 00:10:10,489 You don't want one, and I don't need one. 153 00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:13,153 - Right! - I love the darn things, though. 154 00:10:13,228 --> 00:10:17,130 I could eat those by the dozen. By the looks of it, I have. 155 00:10:17,199 --> 00:10:19,133 Right. 156 00:10:19,201 --> 00:10:22,170 I'm so excited that you're considering... 157 00:10:22,237 --> 00:10:25,536 joining the Target team. We all are. 158 00:10:27,142 --> 00:10:28,404 I appreciate that. 159 00:10:28,476 --> 00:10:31,968 Good. Then let's cut right to the chase. 160 00:10:33,381 --> 00:10:36,714 We're prepared to offer you $42,500 a year... 161 00:10:36,785 --> 00:10:38,912 with a full benefit package. 162 00:10:38,987 --> 00:10:41,353 That's dental, medical, 163 00:10:41,423 --> 00:10:43,584 profit sharing, pensi�n, 164 00:10:43,658 --> 00:10:46,627 expense account, car allowance, 165 00:10:46,695 --> 00:10:48,356 vacation, of course, 166 00:10:48,430 --> 00:10:52,491 and any and all relocating expenses. 167 00:10:52,567 --> 00:10:56,663 This is our first, best, and last offer. What do you think? 168 00:10:57,372 --> 00:11:00,239 Well... um, C. D... 169 00:11:00,308 --> 00:11:02,105 with all due respect, 170 00:11:02,177 --> 00:11:04,145 I came in here... 171 00:11:04,212 --> 00:11:06,874 with the number forty-five in mind, and... 172 00:11:24,866 --> 00:11:26,925 Hmph. 173 00:11:29,037 --> 00:11:31,631 You've got me. 174 00:11:32,641 --> 00:11:35,633 Forty-five it is. 175 00:11:35,710 --> 00:11:38,474 - Welcome aboard. - Thank you. 176 00:11:38,546 --> 00:11:40,844 - I'd like to buy you lunch. - No, no, no. 177 00:11:40,915 --> 00:11:43,110 Your money's no good here. Lunch is mine. 178 00:11:43,184 --> 00:11:46,119 - I'm not going to argue. - Better not. I'm bigger than you. 179 00:11:48,189 --> 00:11:50,680 Hang on a second. I told her to hold my calls. 180 00:11:50,759 --> 00:11:53,819 Yeah, Peg. Uh-huh. 181 00:11:53,895 --> 00:11:56,090 No, it's okay. 182 00:11:56,164 --> 00:11:59,292 - He's right here with me now. - Hi, Peg. 183 00:11:59,367 --> 00:12:01,858 We just closed the deal. Uh-huh. 184 00:12:01,936 --> 00:12:06,270 It was a slam-dunk, too. I got him for forty-five. 185 00:12:11,012 --> 00:12:13,537 No, he's right here. 186 00:12:14,616 --> 00:12:17,551 What do you mean he missed the plane? 187 00:12:19,788 --> 00:12:21,881 Then who the hell am I talking to? 188 00:12:23,692 --> 00:12:25,626 Ohhh! 189 00:12:27,696 --> 00:12:31,598 I'll, uh... I'll get back to you. 190 00:12:31,666 --> 00:12:34,100 I know a great, little Italian place... 191 00:12:34,169 --> 00:12:36,603 that has the best pasta primatonis in the wor... 192 00:12:36,671 --> 00:12:38,605 Excuse me a minute, will you please? 193 00:12:38,673 --> 00:12:41,699 - Lovely wife you have there. - Dodge, James? 194 00:12:43,111 --> 00:12:46,205 Mm-hmm. 195 00:12:46,281 --> 00:12:48,806 James, I'm afraid we have a little misunderstanding. 196 00:12:48,883 --> 00:12:51,716 You see, I thought you came in for the, uh... 197 00:12:51,786 --> 00:12:55,244 operations manager's job. 198 00:12:55,323 --> 00:12:58,759 I have you down here as night cleanup boy. 199 00:13:01,162 --> 00:13:03,027 Well, I'm a little overpaid... 200 00:13:03,098 --> 00:13:05,896 for night cleanup boy, wouldn't you say? 201 00:13:07,535 --> 00:13:11,869 The truth is, James, I can offer you $4.44 per hour. 202 00:13:14,743 --> 00:13:18,235 Uh, four, four... $4.44... 203 00:13:18,313 --> 00:13:21,680 - $4.44. - What about the benefits? 204 00:13:21,750 --> 00:13:24,184 Two fifteen-minute breaks and a half hour for lunch. 205 00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:29,622 And the title is, uh, night... cleanup boy. 206 00:13:29,691 --> 00:13:31,522 Yes. 207 00:13:33,828 --> 00:13:35,056 I'll take it. 208 00:13:35,130 --> 00:13:37,758 Oh, and, uh... Iose the curl. 209 00:13:39,634 --> 00:13:43,092 - Welcome to the Target team. - Thank you. 210 00:13:43,171 --> 00:13:46,436 So the parrot says, "Of course I can talk." 211 00:13:46,508 --> 00:13:49,341 Can you fly? 212 00:13:51,012 --> 00:13:55,142 I don't want any damn Japanese automobile plant in this town. 213 00:13:57,786 --> 00:14:00,812 It... it means jobs. 214 00:14:00,889 --> 00:14:02,948 I don't need a job. 215 00:14:03,024 --> 00:14:05,788 Your governor's tryin' to use my town as a political chip. 216 00:14:05,860 --> 00:14:07,589 I resent that. 217 00:14:07,662 --> 00:14:11,530 There could be some specific benefits for you personally. 218 00:14:15,637 --> 00:14:18,128 Josie! 219 00:14:20,074 --> 00:14:22,235 - Yeah? - Come here. 220 00:14:22,310 --> 00:14:25,546 Meet these gentlemen from the governor's office. 221 00:14:26,681 --> 00:14:29,980 Come on in here, honey. 222 00:14:43,631 --> 00:14:47,067 Honey, I want you to meet Bill, uh... 223 00:14:47,134 --> 00:14:50,797 Uh, Bob. Bob Bosenbeck. 224 00:14:53,808 --> 00:14:55,298 Bob. 225 00:15:11,225 --> 00:15:12,317 Dave. 226 00:15:15,830 --> 00:15:17,695 My pleasure, Dave. 227 00:15:18,766 --> 00:15:22,793 Right. Dave Hockner. 228 00:15:22,870 --> 00:15:25,896 I don't want to interrupt. 229 00:15:25,973 --> 00:15:28,168 Very nice to meet both of you. 230 00:15:28,242 --> 00:15:29,869 Bye. 231 00:15:29,944 --> 00:15:31,878 Bye. 232 00:15:36,450 --> 00:15:39,476 Josie? 233 00:15:39,553 --> 00:15:41,487 Josie! 234 00:15:48,763 --> 00:15:52,130 You pull another stunt like you did today, 235 00:15:52,199 --> 00:15:55,464 I'll beat the livin' daylights outta you! 236 00:16:14,588 --> 00:16:17,887 All right, out! 237 00:16:20,227 --> 00:16:23,628 Out of the vehicle, ma'am. Get out of here! 238 00:16:23,697 --> 00:16:25,665 Get out of the car! 239 00:16:46,220 --> 00:16:47,380 Right on time! 240 00:16:50,724 --> 00:16:52,658 Everything's going as planned. 241 00:16:53,794 --> 00:16:55,056 You ordered a limousine? 242 00:16:56,464 --> 00:16:58,864 Of course. 243 00:16:58,933 --> 00:17:00,867 My first day of work. 244 00:17:00,935 --> 00:17:04,029 How's it gonna look if my dad drives me? 245 00:17:04,104 --> 00:17:06,038 A little treat for getting the job. 246 00:17:06,106 --> 00:17:08,097 It was only fifty bucks. 247 00:17:10,578 --> 00:17:13,479 - Right on time, Henry. - Yes, sir. 248 00:17:13,547 --> 00:17:17,381 Henry, the sign... very wrong. 249 00:17:20,221 --> 00:17:22,246 Ciao! 250 00:17:29,163 --> 00:17:31,324 Hey, Jim, where you going? 251 00:17:32,333 --> 00:17:34,563 Hello, boys. 252 00:17:34,635 --> 00:17:37,160 Going to Paris on an F-14. 253 00:17:37,238 --> 00:17:40,036 Got a peace meeting with the vice president of Bulgaria. 254 00:17:40,107 --> 00:17:43,099 Business, you know? Then I'm going to Venice, 255 00:17:43,177 --> 00:17:45,475 for a spaghetti dinner with the princess of Austria. 256 00:17:45,546 --> 00:17:48,413 A beautiful lady... really big bones. 257 00:17:48,482 --> 00:17:51,110 Remember to brush your teeth, Melvin! 258 00:17:51,185 --> 00:17:54,677 You, too, Sidney! Adi�s! 259 00:17:56,357 --> 00:17:59,884 Jim is so cool! 260 00:19:25,145 --> 00:19:26,237 Bobby. 261 00:19:28,048 --> 00:19:30,448 Got a loose tile here. In the morning... 262 00:19:30,517 --> 00:19:32,314 take care of it. 263 00:19:32,386 --> 00:19:35,253 I don't need a lawsuit, okay? 264 00:19:35,322 --> 00:19:37,552 I've got enough to worry about. 265 00:19:39,326 --> 00:19:40,554 Who's he? 266 00:19:40,628 --> 00:19:42,596 Attention, shoppers. 267 00:19:42,663 --> 00:19:44,597 The store will be closing in five minutes. 268 00:19:44,665 --> 00:19:47,759 Bring all your purchases to the front. 269 00:20:26,140 --> 00:20:31,510 - Are you a slacker? - No, uh, Presbyterian. 270 00:20:31,578 --> 00:20:33,773 What did you say? What did you say? 271 00:20:33,847 --> 00:20:35,974 I'm askin' you a simple question. 272 00:20:36,050 --> 00:20:38,143 - Are you lazy? - No, sir. 273 00:20:38,218 --> 00:20:42,245 The last guy that wore that uniform was a lazy slacker, and I fired his butt. 274 00:20:43,824 --> 00:20:47,988 Uh, about the uniform, will I be getting my own? 275 00:20:48,062 --> 00:20:52,192 You work out, which I doubt, you can have a new name patch. 276 00:20:57,371 --> 00:21:01,705 Would I be able to have it laundered? It smells a little like Darnell. 277 00:21:01,775 --> 00:21:04,107 I don't think you know who you're messin' with. 278 00:21:05,012 --> 00:21:07,037 After you clean the ladies' and mens' crappers... 279 00:21:07,114 --> 00:21:10,174 and you'd better be able to eat off those bowls... 280 00:21:10,250 --> 00:21:13,048 you clean my coffee maker, then wax my desk. 281 00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:15,247 Uh, clean what? 282 00:21:15,322 --> 00:21:18,758 - Clean my coffee maker and wax my desk! - I got it! 283 00:21:18,826 --> 00:21:21,386 Sweep the aisles, startin' with health and beauty. 284 00:21:21,462 --> 00:21:23,396 Work your way over to juniors and misses. 285 00:21:23,464 --> 00:21:25,898 Ups and downs, leaving your debris in the cross aisles. 286 00:21:25,966 --> 00:21:27,900 So, I start with health and beauty... 287 00:21:27,968 --> 00:21:29,959 I just said to start with health and beauty! 288 00:21:30,037 --> 00:21:32,335 Then you do your cross aisles. 289 00:21:32,406 --> 00:21:34,340 That'll bring your dust bin into play. 290 00:21:34,408 --> 00:21:36,433 Take the debris. Load it into the dustbin. 291 00:21:36,510 --> 00:21:39,411 Take the dustbin out to the loading dock... 292 00:21:39,480 --> 00:21:41,414 and empty it into the receptacle. 293 00:21:41,482 --> 00:21:44,007 - Got that? Easy as pie. - Yeah. 294 00:21:44,084 --> 00:21:46,177 I was employed briefly at Del Taco, and... 295 00:21:46,253 --> 00:21:48,821 I don't care about your Del Taco experience. 296 00:21:48,955 --> 00:21:51,253 We've got this problem in this store with grazers. 297 00:21:51,324 --> 00:21:54,885 - You know what a grazer is? - Is that a farm term? 298 00:21:54,961 --> 00:21:58,954 It's a customer or employee that eats off the shelves, 299 00:21:59,031 --> 00:22:01,556 similar to a cow grazing in a field of grass. 300 00:22:01,634 --> 00:22:04,262 Only this isn't a field of grass, and you're not a cow. 301 00:22:04,337 --> 00:22:06,999 There's no eatin'. You're not being paid to eat, so don't! 302 00:22:07,073 --> 00:22:09,940 - Any questions? - Not right off hand. 303 00:22:10,009 --> 00:22:12,443 - Think you can handle it? - I'll give it the old college try. 304 00:22:12,511 --> 00:22:14,536 Don't touch me! 305 00:22:14,614 --> 00:22:17,310 Well, despite our age difference, 306 00:22:17,383 --> 00:22:19,351 I think I'll enjoy working with you. 307 00:22:19,418 --> 00:22:21,682 Let's get something straight. You ain't workin' with me. 308 00:22:21,754 --> 00:22:23,688 You're working for me. 309 00:22:23,756 --> 00:22:27,453 - Still, it'll be fun being around you. - I ain't gonna be near you. 310 00:22:27,526 --> 00:22:30,154 I'm gonna be home pumping the pasties out of Colleen Jackson. 311 00:22:30,229 --> 00:22:34,222 - You're not going to be here? - Hell, no. 312 00:22:34,300 --> 00:22:36,894 I'm gonna be here by myself? 313 00:22:38,471 --> 00:22:42,237 That's right. And you'd better stay out of the ladies' undergoods. 314 00:22:43,676 --> 00:22:47,077 Wait a minute! Nobody told me I'd be here alone. 315 00:22:47,146 --> 00:22:49,614 - What are you doing? - Saving money. 316 00:22:49,682 --> 00:22:51,741 Wait! Are you turning off the lights? 317 00:22:51,817 --> 00:22:54,342 In 25 seconds, you got light in every third aisle. 318 00:22:54,420 --> 00:22:56,786 When the sun comes up, turn off all the lights. 319 00:22:56,856 --> 00:22:58,655 I don't understand. Hold on! 320 00:22:58,690 --> 00:23:00,454 I don't understand. Hold on! 321 00:23:00,526 --> 00:23:02,391 I'm locking you in. 322 00:23:02,461 --> 00:23:04,554 When I come back at 7:00 to open up, 323 00:23:04,630 --> 00:23:06,063 I'll let you out. 324 00:23:08,100 --> 00:23:11,695 - You're locking me in? - What do you take me for, a fool? 325 00:23:11,771 --> 00:23:15,172 Nobody gets keys on their first night. Nobody! 326 00:23:15,241 --> 00:23:17,436 Get to work! 327 00:23:17,510 --> 00:23:20,536 - What if there's a fire? - The fire department will come. 328 00:23:20,613 --> 00:23:24,947 - I could perish! - Ha-ha-ha. Boo! 329 00:23:25,017 --> 00:23:27,451 You can't do this. I'm locked in, alone, in the dark. 330 00:23:27,520 --> 00:23:31,456 That was not a part of my employment agreement. 331 00:24:18,871 --> 00:24:23,069 # You got to wash with the crocodile in the river # 332 00:24:23,142 --> 00:24:27,636 # You got to swim with the sharks in the sea # 333 00:24:27,713 --> 00:24:31,774 # You got to live with the crooked politician # 334 00:24:31,851 --> 00:24:34,945 # Trust those things that you can never see # 335 00:24:35,020 --> 00:24:39,457 # Ay yeah, yeah Ay yeah, yeah # 336 00:24:39,525 --> 00:24:42,085 # Ay yeah, yeah Ay yeah, yeah # 337 00:24:42,161 --> 00:24:43,355 Agh! 338 00:24:52,037 --> 00:24:56,667 # It's a cruel, crazy beautiful worid # 339 00:24:56,742 --> 00:25:01,839 # Every day you wake up I hope it's a blue, blue sky # 340 00:25:04,383 --> 00:25:08,911 # It's a cruel, crazy beautiful worid # 341 00:25:08,988 --> 00:25:11,047 # One day when you wake up # 342 00:25:11,123 --> 00:25:14,217 # I will have to say good-bye # 343 00:25:16,562 --> 00:25:18,359 # Say good-bye # 344 00:25:23,803 --> 00:25:27,671 # It's your worid so live in it, good-bye # 345 00:25:27,740 --> 00:25:31,107 # It's your worid so live in it... ## 346 00:25:47,193 --> 00:25:49,218 9:17! 347 00:25:51,664 --> 00:25:53,928 Time for a break. 348 00:26:19,024 --> 00:26:20,252 Hello. 349 00:26:22,494 --> 00:26:24,428 Anybody out there? 350 00:26:24,496 --> 00:26:26,464 When I accepted... 351 00:26:26,532 --> 00:26:31,060 the post of president, grand poobah of Target, 352 00:26:31,136 --> 00:26:34,970 realizing that I had brought... 353 00:26:35,040 --> 00:26:37,634 meaningfulness, peace, and happiness... 354 00:26:37,710 --> 00:26:39,905 into the lives of thousands of people. 355 00:26:39,979 --> 00:26:43,415 Jim Dodge, of Monroe, 356 00:26:43,482 --> 00:26:45,507 top moneymaker on the tour. 357 00:26:45,584 --> 00:26:47,814 His father's here today, Bud Dodge, 358 00:26:47,887 --> 00:26:49,855 and sister Penny, a sad, sad story, 359 00:26:49,922 --> 00:26:52,857 was just admitted to University Hospital. 360 00:26:52,925 --> 00:26:56,827 While trying to pop a zit, her head mysteriously exploded. 361 00:27:20,819 --> 00:27:22,650 Dad! Hi! 362 00:27:22,721 --> 00:27:24,712 Do you know what time it is? 363 00:27:24,790 --> 00:27:28,157 I'm starting to think about Christmas and gifts, 364 00:27:28,227 --> 00:27:32,027 because I'm in a big store and I'm getting gift ideas. 365 00:27:32,097 --> 00:27:34,964 - Hi. - Mom, hi! 366 00:27:35,034 --> 00:27:36,968 How's it going? 367 00:27:37,036 --> 00:27:39,004 I finished all my janitor stuff. 368 00:27:39,071 --> 00:27:41,562 Most of it. I've got to save some for later. 369 00:27:41,640 --> 00:27:46,043 - It's easy as hell. - Uh, honey, it's a little late. 370 00:27:46,111 --> 00:27:48,477 It is kind of late. 371 00:27:48,547 --> 00:27:51,072 Sleep tight. 372 00:27:51,150 --> 00:27:53,311 See you in the morning. 373 00:27:53,385 --> 00:27:56,081 Love you, too. 374 00:27:59,959 --> 00:28:02,826 Mr. James Dodge! 375 00:28:58,316 --> 00:29:01,251 He can't be happy as the night cleanup boy. 376 00:29:03,188 --> 00:29:05,588 Sweetheart, 377 00:29:05,657 --> 00:29:08,922 he wants us to call him a janitor. 378 00:29:10,929 --> 00:29:13,659 Maybe I should have spent less time harping... 379 00:29:13,731 --> 00:29:16,029 and more time helping. 380 00:29:16,100 --> 00:29:19,558 Harpin' and helpin' him what? 381 00:29:19,637 --> 00:29:23,767 Harpin' on him to leave, and helpin' him become... 382 00:29:23,842 --> 00:29:27,608 the good, mature, productive person he could be. 383 00:30:56,901 --> 00:30:59,199 Are you all right? 384 00:31:00,538 --> 00:31:03,405 Yes, I'm fine, thanks. And you? 385 00:31:04,909 --> 00:31:06,433 What are you doing here? 386 00:31:08,212 --> 00:31:09,975 I work here. 387 00:31:10,048 --> 00:31:12,278 Have a good one, Officer Don. 388 00:31:12,350 --> 00:31:16,377 Okay, Carl. Let me know if you hear anything. 389 00:31:16,454 --> 00:31:18,820 You bet. 390 00:31:18,890 --> 00:31:21,984 Well, sir, she didn't leave on the bus. 391 00:31:22,060 --> 00:31:25,223 Let's look for her someplace else. 392 00:31:25,296 --> 00:31:28,060 She wouldn't be dumb enough to thumb, would she? 393 00:31:28,132 --> 00:31:32,068 Does she have any friends she might have run off with? 394 00:31:33,004 --> 00:31:34,130 Boyfriends? 395 00:31:34,205 --> 00:31:38,107 Just get in the car so we can look for the girl. 396 00:31:38,176 --> 00:31:41,339 I'm tired, haven't had any coffee. 397 00:31:41,412 --> 00:31:44,210 My daughter, I don't know where the hell she is. 398 00:31:44,282 --> 00:31:46,648 And you're sounding like some goddamn preacher! 399 00:31:46,718 --> 00:31:48,652 Come on, get in the car! 400 00:31:50,254 --> 00:31:52,119 Prick. 401 00:31:56,294 --> 00:31:58,990 Are you sure you didn't hurt yourself? 402 00:31:59,063 --> 00:32:01,588 Oh, no. Are you kidding? 403 00:32:01,666 --> 00:32:04,260 No, I'm fine. I'm fine. 404 00:32:04,335 --> 00:32:06,530 Can I ask what you were doing? 405 00:32:06,604 --> 00:32:08,595 I was roller-skating. 406 00:32:08,673 --> 00:32:11,574 - I know, but why? - Why not? 407 00:32:11,642 --> 00:32:15,100 I got bored. One thing led to another... 408 00:32:15,179 --> 00:32:18,512 and I'm roller-skating in my shorts. 409 00:32:18,583 --> 00:32:21,381 Better question would be, "What are you doing here?" 410 00:32:21,452 --> 00:32:23,113 Shopping. 411 00:32:24,422 --> 00:32:26,390 We've been closed for five hours. 412 00:32:26,457 --> 00:32:28,755 Yeah. I fell asleep. 413 00:32:28,826 --> 00:32:31,590 - While shopping? - No, in the ladies' dressing room. 414 00:32:31,662 --> 00:32:35,325 That makes no sense. You're a high-profile young ingenue. 415 00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:39,496 I was debating whether or not to get arrested for shoplifting. 416 00:32:40,638 --> 00:32:43,766 Your father owns $10 million worth of real estate. 417 00:32:43,841 --> 00:32:47,277 - It's not my fault. - I didn't imply such. 418 00:32:47,345 --> 00:32:49,711 It seems funny that someone of your... 419 00:32:50,581 --> 00:32:53,550 - Wealth? - If you will. Would shoplift. 420 00:32:53,618 --> 00:32:56,451 I didn't do it. I chickened out. 421 00:32:57,522 --> 00:32:59,149 Would consider shoplifting. 422 00:33:00,224 --> 00:33:03,751 It's a long, self-indulgent, highly unromantic story... 423 00:33:03,828 --> 00:33:06,160 about an overbearing father, 424 00:33:06,230 --> 00:33:08,289 deceased mother and brother, 425 00:33:08,366 --> 00:33:12,166 and a completely confused girl who looks a little like me. 426 00:33:49,674 --> 00:33:52,837 I sure am glad you dropped by. 427 00:33:52,910 --> 00:33:56,277 I was getting tired of being with myself. 428 00:33:59,117 --> 00:34:03,076 I guess... I'm what you call a people person. 429 00:34:05,556 --> 00:34:08,150 - What are you cooking? - Hobo chicken. 430 00:34:08,226 --> 00:34:10,717 It's a glazed chicken in wine sauce... 431 00:34:10,795 --> 00:34:13,389 with vegetables and skin-on potatoes. 432 00:34:13,464 --> 00:34:16,456 Silverware, silverware. 433 00:34:18,970 --> 00:34:21,461 It's only 210 calories. 434 00:34:21,539 --> 00:34:25,475 I don't know if you're watching your figure, but I sure am. 435 00:34:25,543 --> 00:34:29,240 If you can grab a serving spoon, I think we'll be set. 436 00:34:35,219 --> 00:34:37,244 Keep your distance from these things. 437 00:34:37,321 --> 00:34:39,846 I think it's safe to keep five feet. 438 00:34:44,495 --> 00:34:46,861 I think they're about done. 439 00:34:48,799 --> 00:34:51,962 Dining room's right this way. 440 00:34:53,771 --> 00:34:55,705 Mmm! 441 00:34:58,276 --> 00:35:02,337 I think my father poured the cement for your pool. 442 00:35:03,381 --> 00:35:06,282 He's a cement contractor. Good man. 443 00:35:07,418 --> 00:35:08,976 Bud Dodge? 444 00:35:09,053 --> 00:35:11,954 My mother works at Hoenicker's over Christmas. 445 00:35:12,023 --> 00:35:13,957 My sister's a teller at the bank. 446 00:35:14,025 --> 00:35:16,459 My brother's in grade school. He's not employed. 447 00:35:16,527 --> 00:35:19,291 I used to work at the animal shelter, 448 00:35:19,363 --> 00:35:23,299 but I was terminated. Now I'm working here. 449 00:35:25,203 --> 00:35:26,830 Do you always talk this much? 450 00:35:29,674 --> 00:35:31,733 I guess I do. 451 00:35:31,809 --> 00:35:34,835 I like talking to people. 452 00:35:36,113 --> 00:35:39,742 - Maybe you should go into sales. - I've actually tried that. 453 00:35:46,724 --> 00:35:49,557 Some fresh ground pepper? 454 00:35:49,627 --> 00:35:51,094 Please. 455 00:35:53,531 --> 00:35:55,999 Some people don't like a lot of pepper. Say when. 456 00:35:56,067 --> 00:35:58,058 That's fine. 457 00:35:58,135 --> 00:36:00,069 I happen to really like it a lot. 458 00:36:00,137 --> 00:36:03,595 It enhances the natural flavor of the chicken. 459 00:36:07,245 --> 00:36:10,806 I hope you don't take this the wrong way. 460 00:36:10,881 --> 00:36:12,650 I've had dreams about you. 461 00:36:12,784 --> 00:36:15,344 You've had dreams about me? 462 00:36:16,788 --> 00:36:17,982 Not recently. 463 00:36:18,055 --> 00:36:20,216 I've had dreams about you in the past. 464 00:36:20,291 --> 00:36:23,158 I've had dreams about entire cheerleading squads, 465 00:36:23,227 --> 00:36:25,354 so don't get me wrong. 466 00:36:25,430 --> 00:36:28,593 - It's kid stuff. How 'bout you? - Do I dream? 467 00:36:30,768 --> 00:36:33,100 That's about all I do. 468 00:36:46,717 --> 00:36:50,619 Raisin' a kid's hard work. You got any kids? 469 00:36:50,688 --> 00:36:52,747 No, sir. And from listening to you, 470 00:36:52,824 --> 00:36:55,258 and from observin' this, 471 00:36:55,326 --> 00:36:58,352 I'm kinda grateful Emily turned up infertile. 472 00:37:15,947 --> 00:37:18,780 Shouldn't you be cleaning up the store? 473 00:37:18,850 --> 00:37:20,784 I got plenty of time. 474 00:37:20,852 --> 00:37:24,253 - Big store. - Huge. 475 00:37:25,323 --> 00:37:26,722 Always smoke cigars? 476 00:37:28,326 --> 00:37:30,487 I enjoy a good one after a fine meal. 477 00:37:30,561 --> 00:37:32,495 It settles the stomach. 478 00:37:34,031 --> 00:37:35,521 You're the town liar, right? 479 00:37:40,338 --> 00:37:42,272 - What? - I'm sorry. 480 00:37:42,340 --> 00:37:43,932 That really came out wrong. 481 00:37:45,676 --> 00:37:49,009 - How could it come out right? - That's what people call you. 482 00:37:49,080 --> 00:37:51,241 - I didn't mean to imply it's true. - People call me that? 483 00:37:51,315 --> 00:37:54,443 - I thought you knew. - That I was the town liar? 484 00:37:54,519 --> 00:37:56,885 - You didn't? - No. I'm not. 485 00:37:56,954 --> 00:37:59,855 - You have the wrong information. - I didn't mean to offend you. 486 00:38:00,825 --> 00:38:05,262 - Did you think that was a compliment? - No. And I apologize. 487 00:38:05,329 --> 00:38:09,231 - I can't repeat things like that. - Don't think about it. 488 00:38:09,300 --> 00:38:12,428 As I said, you've got the wrong information. 489 00:38:12,503 --> 00:38:14,664 If people are calling me that, 490 00:38:14,739 --> 00:38:16,866 it's because they're small, petty and jealous. 491 00:38:16,941 --> 00:38:19,842 Small towns are notorious for that. 492 00:38:19,911 --> 00:38:22,072 - I'm sure there's a word for me. - Sure. 493 00:38:22,146 --> 00:38:24,740 - What do they call me? - A tease. 494 00:38:24,815 --> 00:38:27,045 Tease? 495 00:38:27,118 --> 00:38:30,417 Yeah, I can see that. 496 00:38:31,656 --> 00:38:34,386 Actually, I never teased. 497 00:38:34,458 --> 00:38:36,722 This is becoming amusing, 498 00:38:36,794 --> 00:38:40,560 - but who exactly calls me a liar? - Everybody. 499 00:38:40,631 --> 00:38:43,623 - Everybody. - No, not everybody. 500 00:38:43,701 --> 00:38:47,467 - There's some old people in town. - Right. 501 00:38:51,409 --> 00:38:54,742 - What do you think? - What do I think? 502 00:38:56,280 --> 00:38:58,578 Do you think I'm a liar? 503 00:38:58,649 --> 00:39:00,640 I don't know you well enough. 504 00:39:02,753 --> 00:39:06,780 You've known me for 17 years. We went to the same schools from kindergarten on. 505 00:39:06,857 --> 00:39:09,655 I knew of you, but I didn't know you personally. 506 00:39:10,861 --> 00:39:12,954 That's always bothered me. 507 00:39:13,030 --> 00:39:16,659 I mean that old... in-out, us-them thing. 508 00:39:16,734 --> 00:39:20,295 - That's the way it's been. - It's always bothered me. 509 00:39:20,371 --> 00:39:24,899 - It's water over the dam now. - But it's your dam and my water. 510 00:39:24,976 --> 00:39:26,944 I got crapped on a lot of years. 511 00:39:27,011 --> 00:39:29,002 I meant that it's in the past. 512 00:39:29,080 --> 00:39:32,049 The present is a result of the past. 513 00:39:32,116 --> 00:39:34,050 I look at my high school yearbook... 514 00:39:34,118 --> 00:39:37,383 and I don't see four fabulous years. 515 00:39:37,455 --> 00:39:39,616 I'm reminded of what it feels like... 516 00:39:39,690 --> 00:39:42,181 to have my underwear yanked up my ass... 517 00:39:42,259 --> 00:39:44,193 by some big football player. 518 00:39:44,261 --> 00:39:46,593 And where are those guys now? 519 00:39:48,299 --> 00:39:52,929 They're not working nights at Target. I'll tell you that. 520 00:39:53,004 --> 00:39:55,632 Yeah, You know... 521 00:39:55,706 --> 00:39:57,674 I look at my yearbook... 522 00:39:57,742 --> 00:40:01,075 and I see four fabulous years... 523 00:40:02,246 --> 00:40:04,180 that are gonna be the highlight of my life. 524 00:40:04,248 --> 00:40:06,182 Here's what it's like. 525 00:40:06,250 --> 00:40:08,775 First you feel a hand going down your pants... 526 00:40:08,853 --> 00:40:12,050 and tighten around the elastic waistband. 527 00:40:12,123 --> 00:40:13,147 Highlight. 528 00:40:13,224 --> 00:40:14,970 - Sometimes I'd actually see stars. - It's not going to get better. 529 00:40:15,005 --> 00:40:16,716 - Sometimes I'd actually see stars. - It's not going to get better. 530 00:40:16,794 --> 00:40:18,762 If I was particularly unlucky, 531 00:40:18,829 --> 00:40:23,425 my shorts would rip completely free and I'd get this really drastic... 532 00:40:23,501 --> 00:40:25,469 Do you hear me? 533 00:40:27,405 --> 00:40:28,429 Yeah. 534 00:40:31,776 --> 00:40:34,768 I don't really care about a graphic description of a childhood prank. 535 00:40:35,513 --> 00:40:37,743 That prank was a motif in my life. 536 00:40:42,386 --> 00:40:45,583 You know, I'm locked in this store here... 537 00:40:45,656 --> 00:40:48,853 because I didn't have the guts to steal a skirt... 538 00:40:48,926 --> 00:40:51,258 so I could get arrested and embarrass my father... 539 00:40:51,328 --> 00:40:54,229 in this stupid, desperate, childish, 540 00:40:54,298 --> 00:40:56,289 pathetic attempt to leave home. 541 00:40:57,835 --> 00:40:59,769 You have your underwear yanked up your ass. 542 00:40:59,837 --> 00:41:02,931 I have my entire life yanked up my ass! 543 00:41:04,008 --> 00:41:06,977 You were speaking figuratively. I was speaking literally. 544 00:41:07,044 --> 00:41:10,571 And you're happy. You're happy. 545 00:41:10,648 --> 00:41:11,945 I'm not happy. 546 00:41:12,016 --> 00:41:15,611 I'm working nights. Everybody thinks I'm a liar. 547 00:41:15,686 --> 00:41:18,018 My whole family's laughing at me. 548 00:41:18,089 --> 00:41:20,922 Reverend Harwell gave me the finger last week. 549 00:41:20,991 --> 00:41:23,152 At least you have some control over your life. 550 00:41:23,227 --> 00:41:25,661 - So do you. - My father controls my life. 551 00:41:25,730 --> 00:41:29,666 You're over 18. You can tell him to drop dead. 552 00:41:29,734 --> 00:41:33,101 - So can you. - I don't want to. 553 00:41:33,170 --> 00:41:35,798 I like living at home. 554 00:41:35,873 --> 00:41:39,434 - No, you don't. - Am I a garden snail? 555 00:41:40,945 --> 00:41:42,879 An involuntary muscle in a janitor suit? 556 00:41:42,947 --> 00:41:45,040 I know what I want to do. 557 00:41:45,116 --> 00:41:47,084 What could you possibly like... 558 00:41:47,151 --> 00:41:49,119 about living at home at your age? 559 00:41:49,186 --> 00:41:53,088 The meals are great. I mean, there's cable. 560 00:41:55,593 --> 00:41:58,426 The accommodations are excellent, five-star. 561 00:41:58,496 --> 00:42:00,430 What do you care if I'm living at home or not? 562 00:42:01,899 --> 00:42:04,493 Hey, I didn't come here to irritate you. 563 00:42:04,568 --> 00:42:07,162 Well, you're beginning to. 564 00:42:09,039 --> 00:42:11,940 Great. That's really great. 565 00:42:12,009 --> 00:42:15,045 I gotta stop saying those kinds of things. 566 00:42:15,179 --> 00:42:18,376 Those freakin' kids! I knew I couldn't trust 'em. 567 00:42:18,448 --> 00:42:21,315 Town liar. That's a nice rep. 568 00:42:21,385 --> 00:42:23,512 I bet it was Gregory, that little weasel. 569 00:42:23,587 --> 00:42:26,750 Top secret, and they still shoot off their mouths! 570 00:42:26,824 --> 00:42:28,951 If I'd really been a French spy, 571 00:42:29,026 --> 00:42:31,460 those little tots would've gotten me killed! 572 00:42:31,528 --> 00:42:34,793 Piano wire wrapped around my neck. My testicles shoved down my throat. 573 00:42:34,865 --> 00:42:37,857 A piece of dynamite stuck up my ass! 574 00:42:42,906 --> 00:42:45,340 She's so beautiful. 575 00:42:46,743 --> 00:42:49,109 And I'm the town liar. 576 00:42:52,583 --> 00:42:56,451 # Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la # 577 00:42:56,520 --> 00:42:59,455 # Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la # 578 00:43:00,858 --> 00:43:04,692 # Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la # 579 00:43:04,761 --> 00:43:08,197 # Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la # 580 00:43:08,265 --> 00:43:12,861 # Shiny boat through the open doorway # 581 00:43:15,839 --> 00:43:20,640 # Fell in love on a summer day # 582 00:43:23,280 --> 00:43:27,774 # You're only young once but that's all right # 583 00:43:30,454 --> 00:43:36,484 # Because it's just so good to be alive # 584 00:43:38,462 --> 00:43:41,863 # Take away your troubles Take them out the door # 585 00:43:41,932 --> 00:43:47,734 # Ohh, nothing on my mind except my new love # 586 00:43:50,774 --> 00:43:55,302 # Nothing on my mind except my new love # 587 00:43:58,048 --> 00:44:01,040 # Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la # 588 00:44:01,118 --> 00:44:05,350 # Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la ## 589 00:44:31,848 --> 00:44:35,807 Jim, there's no reason to lie right now. 590 00:44:35,886 --> 00:44:38,821 There's no one to impress. 591 00:44:38,889 --> 00:44:42,381 I'm not impressed by a man telling me he likes living at home. 592 00:44:42,459 --> 00:44:45,826 Excuse me, I'm not lying, 593 00:44:45,896 --> 00:44:47,830 and I'm not trying to impress you. 594 00:44:47,898 --> 00:44:50,025 So if you'll excuse me, 595 00:44:50,100 --> 00:44:53,092 I have to clean dead flies out of the lighting fixtures. 596 00:44:53,170 --> 00:44:56,037 Okay, my error. I apologize. 597 00:44:56,106 --> 00:44:59,598 It's just that I can't imagine a man... 598 00:44:59,676 --> 00:45:03,669 giving up his independence, his right to mate, 599 00:45:03,747 --> 00:45:05,772 to have a family, 600 00:45:05,849 --> 00:45:10,411 to build a life for himself, for good cooking. 601 00:45:10,487 --> 00:45:11,818 Hold on. 602 00:45:11,888 --> 00:45:14,618 I have not given up my right to mate. 603 00:45:14,691 --> 00:45:17,125 I have the right to mate... 604 00:45:17,194 --> 00:45:20,163 anytime I feel like mating. 605 00:45:20,230 --> 00:45:22,221 You go out with someone. 606 00:45:22,299 --> 00:45:26,201 You bring her home. You introduce her to... 607 00:45:26,269 --> 00:45:29,966 Mom, Dad, Sis, Billy, 608 00:45:30,040 --> 00:45:31,598 Wolfie the dog. 609 00:45:31,675 --> 00:45:36,078 Cocktails in the rumpus room, and then do it on the bunk bed? 610 00:45:38,148 --> 00:45:40,378 Let's analyze that remark. 611 00:45:40,450 --> 00:45:41,781 I don't have a dog, 612 00:45:41,852 --> 00:45:44,116 my brother's not named Billy, 613 00:45:44,187 --> 00:45:46,655 and I don't even have a rumpus room. 614 00:45:46,723 --> 00:45:48,748 You know what I mean. 615 00:45:53,930 --> 00:45:57,127 Yeah, I know what you mean. 616 00:45:57,200 --> 00:46:00,363 Spit on me, make me feel lousy. 617 00:46:05,475 --> 00:46:06,942 Jim? 618 00:46:08,512 --> 00:46:10,946 You said something that wasn't true. 619 00:46:12,115 --> 00:46:13,776 No. 620 00:46:13,850 --> 00:46:19,789 No, I said that I can have sex when I want to, and I do. 621 00:46:20,791 --> 00:46:22,816 However, I was looking forward... 622 00:46:22,893 --> 00:46:25,987 to a nice, quiet evening of janitoring. 623 00:46:26,063 --> 00:46:29,430 I don't think you see what I'm getting at. 624 00:46:29,499 --> 00:46:31,433 I see what you're getting at. 625 00:46:31,501 --> 00:46:34,834 I'm a lying monk with an Oedipus complex and an appetite for home cooking. 626 00:46:34,905 --> 00:46:37,100 Don't forget, you're the indecisive shoplifter. 627 00:46:37,174 --> 00:46:38,698 Yes! Exactly. 628 00:46:38,775 --> 00:46:41,710 I would do anything to be in your shoes. 629 00:46:41,778 --> 00:46:44,178 These are Darnell's shoes. 630 00:46:44,247 --> 00:46:47,944 You have freedom, and you're not using it. 631 00:46:48,018 --> 00:46:50,043 It makes me sad. 632 00:46:50,120 --> 00:46:53,817 You have the wealth of the entire town, and you're trying to get arrested. 633 00:46:53,890 --> 00:46:57,883 - That makes me sad. - That makes me sad, too. 634 00:46:57,961 --> 00:47:01,226 - That's pretty stupid. - It's very stupid. 635 00:47:01,298 --> 00:47:03,232 Are you serious? 636 00:47:03,300 --> 00:47:05,700 I mean, you haven't been drinking? 637 00:47:05,769 --> 00:47:08,067 This isn't the bottle talking? 638 00:47:08,138 --> 00:47:10,197 No. 639 00:47:10,273 --> 00:47:13,538 Then why don't you just talk to the guy? 640 00:47:15,312 --> 00:47:18,179 For the same reason that you can't leave home, 641 00:47:18,248 --> 00:47:21,706 I can't tell my father to go to hell. 642 00:47:21,785 --> 00:47:23,719 Why not? 643 00:47:25,922 --> 00:47:29,653 Because I don't want to be alone. 644 00:47:56,586 --> 00:47:59,555 Mr. McClellan? 645 00:47:59,623 --> 00:48:03,821 You ever have any family problems, you and your daughter? 646 00:48:03,894 --> 00:48:07,330 What the hell do you think this is? 647 00:48:07,397 --> 00:48:09,331 You got a point. 648 00:48:14,538 --> 00:48:17,302 Would you go with me somewhere? 649 00:48:19,276 --> 00:48:21,506 - Where? - Florida? 650 00:48:21,578 --> 00:48:24,138 Wyoming? Spain? 651 00:48:24,214 --> 00:48:26,910 It doesn't really matter, just away somewhere. 652 00:48:27,884 --> 00:48:29,146 I'd love to. 653 00:48:30,220 --> 00:48:32,711 I just can't afford to be... 654 00:48:32,789 --> 00:48:35,417 capricious and carefree like yourself. 655 00:48:35,492 --> 00:48:39,019 I've gotta set my sights on something, and really go for it. 656 00:48:39,696 --> 00:48:42,893 - Night janitor? - It's a beginning. 657 00:48:42,966 --> 00:48:45,366 - I-I'm lookin' at... - It's an end. 658 00:48:48,305 --> 00:48:50,796 Maybe if you had a destination in mind, 659 00:48:50,874 --> 00:48:53,604 that would make all the difference in the worid. 660 00:48:53,677 --> 00:48:56,908 - Why? - Well, uh, 661 00:48:56,980 --> 00:49:00,916 I'm just not built to aimlessly roam the worid. 662 00:49:00,984 --> 00:49:03,350 I'm too conservative for that. 663 00:49:04,754 --> 00:49:08,747 Well, I was thinking about Los �ngeles. 664 00:49:08,825 --> 00:49:11,919 Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 665 00:49:11,995 --> 00:49:15,988 - What for? - Live, work. 666 00:49:16,066 --> 00:49:18,557 - At what? - Whatever. 667 00:49:18,635 --> 00:49:21,729 And what about your father? 668 00:49:21,805 --> 00:49:24,069 When I don't die, 669 00:49:24,140 --> 00:49:27,200 he'll realize I can make it on my own. 670 00:49:27,277 --> 00:49:30,947 If I do, he'll have the satisfaction of knowing that I can't. 671 00:49:31,081 --> 00:49:34,141 If he brings me back, or if I go back on my own, 672 00:49:34,217 --> 00:49:36,651 he's just gonna beat the shit out of me. 673 00:49:36,720 --> 00:49:40,019 - So it doesn't make a difference. - Literally? 674 00:49:42,892 --> 00:49:44,359 Yeah. 675 00:49:45,895 --> 00:49:49,228 - Sad. - Yeah, it's sad. 676 00:49:49,299 --> 00:49:52,666 Until he throws you across the room, it's sad. 677 00:49:52,736 --> 00:49:55,830 I'm afraid to live with him, and I'm afraid to live without... 678 00:49:55,905 --> 00:50:00,239 You didn't come to work to hear this stuff. I'm really sorry. 679 00:50:00,310 --> 00:50:03,336 I'm gonna clean this up. 680 00:50:09,986 --> 00:50:11,977 I'm just surprised. 681 00:50:12,055 --> 00:50:14,853 I thought everything was okay, you know. 682 00:50:14,924 --> 00:50:17,859 I figured you got a nice car, a nice house, some money. 683 00:50:17,927 --> 00:50:22,159 - Everything's okay. - It should be, but it's not. 684 00:50:22,232 --> 00:50:24,359 It's twisted and it's distorted, 685 00:50:24,434 --> 00:50:28,336 and it can't be changed and it cannot be saved. 686 00:50:34,711 --> 00:50:35,973 I'll go with you. 687 00:50:40,784 --> 00:50:42,752 Really? 688 00:50:43,987 --> 00:50:44,954 Yeah. 689 00:50:46,723 --> 00:50:48,657 We have to get a car. 690 00:50:50,059 --> 00:50:51,993 Let's get through the night, first. 691 00:50:52,061 --> 00:50:54,188 - I have money. - How much? 692 00:50:54,264 --> 00:50:56,289 Fifty-two thousand dollars. 693 00:50:58,768 --> 00:50:59,860 On you? 694 00:51:01,938 --> 00:51:03,929 In my purse. 695 00:51:15,752 --> 00:51:19,449 Fifty-two thousand dollars. Wow. 696 00:51:19,522 --> 00:51:22,719 I've never seen so much money in my life. 697 00:51:22,792 --> 00:51:25,226 This is more than my house cost. 698 00:51:25,595 --> 00:51:29,429 Jim, now that I'm spending the night, 699 00:51:29,499 --> 00:51:31,467 how can I pay you back... 700 00:51:31,534 --> 00:51:33,934 for being so cold to you in high school? 701 00:51:36,539 --> 00:51:38,939 Do you need an answer right away? 702 00:51:39,008 --> 00:51:42,944 No. Sometime before the sun comes up. 703 00:51:46,583 --> 00:51:48,915 Well, uh, 704 00:51:48,985 --> 00:51:51,453 you're probably not going to remember this, 705 00:51:51,521 --> 00:51:53,455 but, uh, 706 00:51:53,523 --> 00:51:56,185 there was a homecoming dance our sophomore year. 707 00:51:56,259 --> 00:51:59,888 - Mm-hmm. - Do you remember Mrs. Noble? 708 00:51:59,963 --> 00:52:04,662 Large, hairy gym teacher with suspiciously cumbersome groin bulge? 709 00:52:04,734 --> 00:52:06,599 I had her for two years. 710 00:52:06,669 --> 00:52:08,603 She made everybody switch partners... 711 00:52:08,671 --> 00:52:10,798 because the fat giris were dancing together, 712 00:52:10,874 --> 00:52:13,035 and the doinks, myself included, were against the wall blowing spit bubbles. 713 00:52:13,109 --> 00:52:14,474 Right. 714 00:52:14,544 --> 00:52:18,002 Well, for three-quarters... 715 00:52:18,081 --> 00:52:21,107 of one verse of a slow song, 716 00:52:21,184 --> 00:52:23,379 we danced together. 717 00:52:24,754 --> 00:52:26,244 You reeked of Stri-Dex. 718 00:52:27,257 --> 00:52:29,589 Oh, no, that was Larry Fry. 719 00:52:29,659 --> 00:52:32,025 I'm sorry. 720 00:52:32,095 --> 00:52:34,222 I don't remember. 721 00:52:35,832 --> 00:52:39,563 - You got your hair caught in my braces. - I don't remember. 722 00:52:39,636 --> 00:52:42,764 Well, it's not important. 723 00:52:44,440 --> 00:52:48,171 I had... Well, I had just always... 724 00:52:48,244 --> 00:52:50,838 dreamed of finishing that dance. 725 00:52:53,716 --> 00:52:54,808 Okay. 726 00:52:58,154 --> 00:53:00,748 Don't feel you have to answer right away. 727 00:53:00,823 --> 00:53:04,816 It's just a small portion of my life that's incomplete. 728 00:53:04,894 --> 00:53:07,488 I thought you were gonna say something different. 729 00:53:13,803 --> 00:53:15,737 Well, 730 00:53:16,839 --> 00:53:19,069 first things first. 731 00:53:35,124 --> 00:53:38,389 # When things go wrong # 732 00:53:40,163 --> 00:53:43,155 # As they sometimes will # 733 00:53:43,232 --> 00:53:48,864 # When the road you're trodding seems all uphill # 734 00:53:51,240 --> 00:53:55,336 # When the funds are low # 735 00:53:56,412 --> 00:53:59,279 # And the debts are high # 736 00:53:59,349 --> 00:54:05,515 # And you wanna smile but you have to sigh # 737 00:54:08,157 --> 00:54:15,063 # When care is pressing you down a bit # 738 00:54:15,131 --> 00:54:20,967 # Rest if you must # 739 00:54:22,005 --> 00:54:25,031 # But don't you quit # 740 00:54:26,609 --> 00:54:29,840 # Oh no # 741 00:54:29,912 --> 00:54:33,609 # Don't you quit # 742 00:54:34,884 --> 00:54:37,580 # Oh no # 743 00:54:52,468 --> 00:54:56,302 # But you never can tell # 744 00:54:56,372 --> 00:55:00,672 # How close you are # 745 00:55:00,743 --> 00:55:07,114 # It may be near when it seems so far # 746 00:55:07,183 --> 00:55:09,151 # Ooo ooo ## 747 00:55:21,998 --> 00:55:24,626 You're ticklish there? 748 00:55:44,587 --> 00:55:46,350 Aaah! 749 00:55:49,058 --> 00:55:50,923 Ow. 750 00:56:22,024 --> 00:56:23,958 Officer Don! 751 00:56:24,026 --> 00:56:28,986 You scared the crap out of me. I thought it was the custodian. 752 00:56:29,065 --> 00:56:30,930 What are you doing? 753 00:56:31,000 --> 00:56:33,403 I work here now. 754 00:56:38,108 --> 00:56:39,575 You wanna let me in? 755 00:56:39,643 --> 00:56:43,579 I'd love to. I don't have the keys. 756 00:56:43,647 --> 00:56:45,581 I'm locked in 'til 7 a.m. 757 00:56:45,649 --> 00:56:49,710 - What's going on? - Have you seen Josie McClellan? 758 00:56:50,954 --> 00:56:52,319 Of course. 759 00:56:52,389 --> 00:56:57,588 Uh, dark hair, green eyes, beautiful. 760 00:56:57,661 --> 00:56:59,060 Oh, yeah. Of course. 761 00:56:59,129 --> 00:57:02,621 - You seen her recently? - Oh! 762 00:57:02,699 --> 00:57:05,634 Ah... I just saw her yesterday. 763 00:57:05,702 --> 00:57:07,966 We had a cup of java together. 764 00:57:08,038 --> 00:57:09,630 She come into the store? 765 00:57:09,706 --> 00:57:12,698 I don't know. I only work nights. 766 00:57:12,776 --> 00:57:16,837 - Why? - Well... she's missing. 767 00:57:16,913 --> 00:57:21,407 I was looking this side of town for her and I come past. 768 00:57:21,484 --> 00:57:24,282 I seen that the outside sign's on. 769 00:57:24,354 --> 00:57:28,654 - The outside sign's never on. - Oh, yeah. 770 00:57:28,725 --> 00:57:33,162 Did you try the library? Maybe she fell asleep reading. 771 00:57:34,531 --> 00:57:35,589 No. 772 00:57:35,665 --> 00:57:37,633 She's probably screwing somebody... 773 00:57:37,701 --> 00:57:40,169 the old man don't approve of. 774 00:57:45,408 --> 00:57:51,108 Would you know if the custodian comes by to check up on people? 775 00:57:51,181 --> 00:57:54,275 I wouldn't think he'd do that, Jimmy. 776 00:57:54,351 --> 00:57:56,512 I feel pretty good now. 777 00:58:05,996 --> 00:58:07,987 I'm sorry, sir. 778 00:58:08,064 --> 00:58:10,828 I had to practice a little therapy. 779 00:58:10,900 --> 00:58:13,130 Boy's in his own worid. 780 00:58:20,210 --> 00:58:21,404 # Can't believe you've left me # 781 00:58:21,478 --> 00:58:23,275 # So know that you've upset me # 782 00:58:23,346 --> 00:58:25,109 # You just want to forget me # 783 00:58:25,181 --> 00:58:26,944 # Why don't you come and get me # 784 00:58:27,017 --> 00:58:28,780 # And, boy I really miss you # 785 00:58:28,852 --> 00:58:30,615 # And all I wanna do is kiss you # 786 00:58:30,687 --> 00:58:32,382 # I've used up all my tissues # 787 00:58:32,455 --> 00:58:34,252 # 'Cause it's more serious some issues # 788 00:58:34,324 --> 00:58:36,189 # I don't even know the reason # 789 00:58:36,259 --> 00:58:37,851 # You were playin' and you were teasin' # 790 00:58:37,927 --> 00:58:39,690 # Didn't tell me you were leavin' # 791 00:58:39,763 --> 00:58:42,027 # Those good looks are deceivin' # 792 00:58:42,098 --> 00:58:45,590 # Where are you, baby We used to have so much fun # 793 00:58:45,669 --> 00:58:47,432 # You drive me crazy # 794 00:58:47,504 --> 00:58:49,631 # Somebody tell me where he's gone # 795 00:58:49,706 --> 00:58:53,107 # Where are you, baby We used to have so much fun # 796 00:58:53,176 --> 00:58:56,077 # You drive me crazy # 797 00:58:56,146 --> 00:58:57,875 # You peep in through the window # 798 00:58:57,947 --> 00:58:59,881 # This is too much for me to handle # 799 00:58:59,949 --> 00:59:03,350 # Already caused a scandal a disturbance like a vandal # 800 00:59:03,420 --> 00:59:05,285 # I've lost track of all time # 801 00:59:05,355 --> 00:59:07,448 # 'Cause you're always on my mind # 802 00:59:07,524 --> 00:59:09,856 # You're just that type of guy that'll make me cry # 803 00:59:09,926 --> 00:59:12,417 # Oh why, oh why, oh why Oh why has he disappeared # 804 00:59:12,495 --> 00:59:14,156 # This feeling is really weird # 805 00:59:14,230 --> 00:59:18,667 # You're reckless and you're dear Can you feel when I drop these tears # 806 00:59:18,735 --> 00:59:21,670 # Where are you, baby We used to have so much fun # 807 00:59:21,738 --> 00:59:24,104 # You drive me crazy # 808 00:59:24,174 --> 00:59:25,971 # Somebody tell me where he's gone # 809 00:59:26,042 --> 00:59:29,341 # Where are you, baby We used to have so much fun # 810 00:59:29,412 --> 00:59:31,744 # You drive me crazy # 811 00:59:55,071 --> 00:59:58,871 # Where are you, baby We used to have so much fun ## 812 01:00:04,514 --> 01:00:06,482 Aaah! 813 01:00:45,555 --> 01:00:47,682 Why don't we get underneath the bench? 814 01:00:50,994 --> 01:00:53,588 Do you want to get on top? 815 01:01:00,804 --> 01:01:02,669 You check the office. I'll scope the dressing rooms. 816 01:01:02,739 --> 01:01:04,366 Right. 817 01:01:12,982 --> 01:01:15,644 You're on top. 818 01:01:16,753 --> 01:01:19,278 - Did you want to be on top? - Oh, no. 819 01:01:19,355 --> 01:01:22,051 I'm fine where I am. 820 01:01:22,125 --> 01:01:24,059 Sure. 821 01:01:57,060 --> 01:02:00,120 Ow, ow, ow. 822 01:02:02,365 --> 01:02:05,732 I think he went to the back. 823 01:02:16,379 --> 01:02:18,370 Evening. 824 01:02:22,185 --> 01:02:24,176 Nice. 825 01:02:24,254 --> 01:02:26,188 Excellent. 826 01:02:26,256 --> 01:02:30,659 Hey, you got a tattoo? 827 01:02:31,694 --> 01:02:32,718 No, sir. 828 01:02:32,795 --> 01:02:36,287 - Not you, asshole! - I'm a missing person. 829 01:02:36,366 --> 01:02:38,994 The whole town is looking for me. 830 01:02:39,068 --> 01:02:41,559 - You hidin' out? - Yes. 831 01:02:41,638 --> 01:02:44,698 I'd appreciate it if you'd let us sit up. 832 01:02:44,774 --> 01:02:48,801 - What about the tattoo? - I don't have one. 833 01:02:48,878 --> 01:02:52,075 - You owe me a buck. - Actually, it's up to two. 834 01:02:52,148 --> 01:02:54,673 I borrowed that one off you at Burger King. 835 01:02:54,751 --> 01:02:56,946 Excuse me! 836 01:02:58,087 --> 01:03:00,248 Are you planning to shoot us in the back of the head? 837 01:03:00,323 --> 01:03:03,986 We haven't decided yet, have we? 838 01:03:04,060 --> 01:03:06,153 Who are you? 839 01:03:06,229 --> 01:03:09,221 Ah... you don't want to know. 840 01:03:09,299 --> 01:03:11,665 Wouldn't have asked if he didn't want to know! 841 01:03:11,734 --> 01:03:15,465 - He's a little crazy. He's my brother. - That's not true. 842 01:03:15,538 --> 01:03:17,631 She doesn't even know me. 843 01:03:17,707 --> 01:03:20,801 - Somebody better start talking straight here. - That's the truth. 844 01:03:20,877 --> 01:03:22,936 Okay. 845 01:03:23,846 --> 01:03:25,905 You want to know? 846 01:03:27,483 --> 01:03:28,450 Mm-hmm. 847 01:03:28,518 --> 01:03:31,419 Okay, good. But... 848 01:03:32,855 --> 01:03:33,981 come on over here. 849 01:03:35,391 --> 01:03:38,160 - What? - Come on over. 850 01:03:38,294 --> 01:03:39,761 Come on over here! 851 01:03:39,828 --> 01:03:41,796 Over here. 852 01:03:58,247 --> 01:04:00,181 Come on down here. 853 01:04:02,952 --> 01:04:04,886 That's right. Down here! 854 01:04:07,523 --> 01:04:09,320 Okay. 855 01:04:10,392 --> 01:04:13,555 You dumb sons of bitches! 856 01:04:13,629 --> 01:04:16,826 Do you realize that you have just walked... 857 01:04:16,899 --> 01:04:20,357 straight into a $60-million drug transaction? 858 01:04:23,372 --> 01:04:27,809 You're running this multi-zillion-dollar drug transaction by yourself? 859 01:04:27,876 --> 01:04:32,040 - Little Target boy? - No. 860 01:04:32,114 --> 01:04:34,582 No, I'm not doing it by myself. 861 01:04:34,650 --> 01:04:36,709 Oh, no, no. 862 01:04:36,785 --> 01:04:39,720 As a matter of fact, 863 01:04:39,788 --> 01:04:42,222 in about 10 minutes... 864 01:04:42,291 --> 01:04:44,987 this place is gonna be alive with the meanest, 865 01:04:45,060 --> 01:04:49,429 ugliest, most impatient animals you guys have ever seen. 866 01:04:49,498 --> 01:04:52,831 I'll give you five minutes to take... 867 01:04:52,901 --> 01:04:55,131 whatever you want in the whole store. 868 01:04:55,204 --> 01:04:57,604 I won't tell. Take your guns and go. 869 01:04:58,974 --> 01:05:00,339 Okay, then, who's the girl? 870 01:05:02,678 --> 01:05:06,307 - I'm his hostage. - Yes. Yes. Yes. 871 01:05:06,382 --> 01:05:09,374 Is that true? Hmm? 872 01:05:09,451 --> 01:05:12,318 Yes! Yes, it's true. 873 01:05:12,388 --> 01:05:14,379 And, um... 874 01:05:17,259 --> 01:05:21,355 if the deal doesn't go down, she becomes pig feed. 875 01:05:21,430 --> 01:05:22,556 Bullshit. 876 01:05:22,631 --> 01:05:24,792 Oh, really? 877 01:05:27,603 --> 01:05:30,731 - Well, blow her away. - That's bullshit! 878 01:05:32,241 --> 01:05:34,732 Okay. 879 01:05:34,810 --> 01:05:38,837 Then give me your guns and I'll do it for you. 880 01:05:38,914 --> 01:05:40,643 It's bullshit, right? 881 01:05:41,550 --> 01:05:43,575 We'll see. 882 01:05:46,355 --> 01:05:47,447 Roll over. 883 01:05:47,523 --> 01:05:49,457 - You heard him. - What? 884 01:05:49,525 --> 01:05:51,584 Roll over! You too, honey. 885 01:05:51,660 --> 01:05:53,958 You heard me. Roll over. Do it! 886 01:05:54,029 --> 01:05:56,862 Come on, come on! Roll! That's it. 887 01:05:56,932 --> 01:06:00,459 - Very good. - Mmm! Yeah. 888 01:06:00,536 --> 01:06:03,937 Um... give me the guns! 889 01:06:04,907 --> 01:06:07,171 No way, man. Uh-uh. 890 01:06:07,242 --> 01:06:08,470 Fine. 891 01:06:08,544 --> 01:06:12,446 You do it. I don't need her anymore. 892 01:06:12,514 --> 01:06:15,449 - I only needed her to get through customs. - I don't like this. 893 01:06:15,517 --> 01:06:17,542 This sucks. It's not worth it. 894 01:06:17,619 --> 01:06:21,612 - We don't have time. Do it! - All right. 895 01:06:24,093 --> 01:06:25,856 It's nothing personal. 896 01:06:25,994 --> 01:06:28,588 - Jim! - Too late. They're here! 897 01:06:28,664 --> 01:06:30,757 It's too late. They're here. 898 01:06:30,833 --> 01:06:34,166 Men, hold your fire. 899 01:06:34,236 --> 01:06:37,672 Ned, Tommy, hold your fire. 900 01:06:37,739 --> 01:06:40,902 There are infrared scopes trained on your heads. 901 01:06:40,976 --> 01:06:45,003 - We didn't want this! - It's the girl you want, not us! 902 01:06:45,080 --> 01:06:48,106 Ned, we got a WD-40. That's right, a full-scale PMS. 903 01:06:48,183 --> 01:06:50,617 Okay, everybody just relax! 904 01:06:50,686 --> 01:06:54,122 Everybody, just relax! The place is gonna blow. 905 01:06:54,189 --> 01:06:57,420 Just relax. Now, put down your guns. 906 01:06:57,493 --> 01:07:00,621 They're putting down the guns. Are you putting them down? 907 01:07:00,696 --> 01:07:03,529 Get down 'cause lives are at stake. 908 01:07:03,599 --> 01:07:06,966 Let go. Now get back. 909 01:07:07,035 --> 01:07:10,436 Get back. Spread 'em. Spread the legs. Put down the dogs. 910 01:07:10,506 --> 01:07:12,736 Okay, put the dogs down. 911 01:07:12,808 --> 01:07:14,400 Both of 'em! 912 01:07:14,476 --> 01:07:16,967 Put the dogs down! Down! 913 01:07:17,045 --> 01:07:21,141 - That was great! - I got a surprise for you guys. 914 01:07:21,216 --> 01:07:24,481 We have a bit of a surprise for you. 915 01:07:25,888 --> 01:07:27,185 Them guns aren't loaded. 916 01:07:38,167 --> 01:07:41,762 I got an idea. How about a truce? 917 01:07:41,837 --> 01:07:44,806 I'm full of shit. You're full of shit. 918 01:07:44,873 --> 01:07:47,307 Everybody at one time is full of shit. 919 01:07:47,376 --> 01:07:50,971 I'll throw on some corn dogs and we'll get to know each other. 920 01:07:51,046 --> 01:07:53,708 I'd like to know what goes on inside your heads. 921 01:07:53,782 --> 01:07:56,615 - Okay, you had the big one... - No. 922 01:07:56,685 --> 01:08:00,519 Sorry. I could've sworn you had the big one. 923 01:08:00,589 --> 01:08:02,079 Ha! 924 01:08:03,025 --> 01:08:05,016 I lied. 925 01:08:09,531 --> 01:08:12,796 These are the men that killed that guy in Saltburg. 926 01:08:12,868 --> 01:08:16,304 I'm fairly sure that we're gonna die. 927 01:08:16,371 --> 01:08:19,306 I'm disappointed we're not going to California together. 928 01:08:19,374 --> 01:08:22,241 We're not dead yet. 929 01:08:22,311 --> 01:08:25,109 Pretty darn close. 930 01:08:25,180 --> 01:08:27,808 If I can get them to take me with them, 931 01:08:27,883 --> 01:08:30,750 maybe I can get away and come back for you. 932 01:08:30,819 --> 01:08:34,277 We need a car and they obviously have one. 933 01:08:34,356 --> 01:08:36,256 Just... 934 01:08:36,325 --> 01:08:38,793 - go along with whatever I do. - Okay. 935 01:08:50,939 --> 01:08:53,169 So, what's the word on you two? 936 01:08:53,242 --> 01:08:56,973 Are you married? Obviously... 937 01:08:57,045 --> 01:09:00,105 you're hack crooks if you can't pull off a discount store job. 938 01:09:02,517 --> 01:09:05,077 What were you planning to steal? Hair spray? 939 01:09:09,424 --> 01:09:10,413 Sorry. 940 01:09:14,630 --> 01:09:15,927 Lady, you got a job? 941 01:09:17,532 --> 01:09:19,193 No. 942 01:09:19,268 --> 01:09:21,099 Then don't knock ours. 943 01:09:21,970 --> 01:09:25,030 Crime isn't a job. It's a sickness. 944 01:09:28,944 --> 01:09:32,710 Whoops. Anyone have some change? 945 01:09:44,159 --> 01:09:46,992 You look like a lady in need of a quarter. 946 01:09:47,062 --> 01:09:49,656 I might need more than just a quarter. 947 01:09:52,601 --> 01:09:55,035 - You know... - No. 948 01:09:55,103 --> 01:09:57,094 You and I could make a lot of money. 949 01:09:57,172 --> 01:09:59,936 Honey, me and Nestor are partners. 950 01:10:00,008 --> 01:10:04,206 - We don't need a third. - You don't know, so shut up. 951 01:10:08,183 --> 01:10:10,549 Hop on. 952 01:10:26,468 --> 01:10:30,268 Now. Let's go now. 953 01:10:32,107 --> 01:10:33,597 Know what you are? 954 01:10:33,675 --> 01:10:35,108 Yeah. 955 01:10:35,177 --> 01:10:37,771 You are one good-looking ball of trouble. 956 01:10:40,182 --> 01:10:41,376 Good. 957 01:10:52,895 --> 01:10:56,524 # Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya # 958 01:10:58,100 --> 01:11:02,332 # Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya # 959 01:11:06,041 --> 01:11:08,100 # Go # 960 01:11:18,754 --> 01:11:20,813 What do you think, for the car? 961 01:11:20,889 --> 01:11:24,655 - This one? - The whole thing. We'll lay it in back. 962 01:11:24,726 --> 01:11:27,126 We got multi-cassette capabilities. 963 01:11:27,195 --> 01:11:28,992 Think of the sound! 964 01:11:29,064 --> 01:11:32,431 # Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya # 965 01:11:34,236 --> 01:11:38,229 # Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya # 966 01:11:39,775 --> 01:11:43,677 # Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya # 967 01:11:44,880 --> 01:11:49,442 # Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya # 968 01:11:50,886 --> 01:11:54,583 # Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya # 969 01:11:55,791 --> 01:11:59,318 I'm not helping you load your car. 970 01:11:59,394 --> 01:12:00,827 Think again, boy. 971 01:12:00,896 --> 01:12:03,888 You're not taking the stolen merchandise out. 972 01:12:03,966 --> 01:12:06,230 - I'm not gonna let you. - Get out. 973 01:12:06,301 --> 01:12:08,394 It's stolen. All of it! 974 01:12:08,470 --> 01:12:10,404 - Gimme that! - No! 975 01:12:10,472 --> 01:12:12,804 - Give it to me! - It's mine! 976 01:12:16,945 --> 01:12:18,970 But where... 977 01:12:19,047 --> 01:12:21,515 Wait a minute. 978 01:12:23,285 --> 01:12:26,880 - You're not going with them? - Yeah. 979 01:12:26,955 --> 01:12:30,152 You'll be an accessory. 980 01:12:30,225 --> 01:12:34,127 - So? - You don't know anything about them. 981 01:12:34,196 --> 01:12:36,494 You certainly don't know anything about him! 982 01:12:36,565 --> 01:12:39,033 These are hardened criminals here! 983 01:12:39,101 --> 01:12:41,501 That's enough! 984 01:12:42,704 --> 01:12:45,434 Don't waste your time. You could get a hernia. 985 01:12:45,507 --> 01:12:48,101 If my foot could talk, 986 01:12:48,176 --> 01:12:51,339 it'd say, "May I please go up this geek's ass?" 987 01:12:51,413 --> 01:12:53,643 - Forget him! - All right. 988 01:12:53,715 --> 01:12:56,878 He's no use to us. He's built like an oyster. 989 01:12:56,952 --> 01:12:58,351 Listen. 990 01:13:00,722 --> 01:13:02,952 If you tell on us, 991 01:13:03,025 --> 01:13:05,118 I'll kill you. 992 01:13:09,798 --> 01:13:11,732 Fine. 993 01:13:16,138 --> 01:13:18,538 Jim? 994 01:13:26,848 --> 01:13:28,440 Don't be an ass. 995 01:13:31,119 --> 01:13:33,053 Okay, Jimbo? 996 01:13:35,857 --> 01:13:37,882 Let's go, shall we? 997 01:14:04,853 --> 01:14:07,321 Ahem. 998 01:14:07,389 --> 01:14:08,913 C'mon, come on! 999 01:14:26,575 --> 01:14:28,509 You got it? 1000 01:14:28,577 --> 01:14:30,670 I got 'em, I got 'em. 1001 01:15:53,361 --> 01:15:56,125 That wasn't a store robbery. 1002 01:15:56,198 --> 01:15:58,428 That was an assassination. 1003 01:15:58,500 --> 01:16:01,298 That wasn't a clerk. That was a wise guy. 1004 01:16:01,369 --> 01:16:04,770 How do I know? I spent a little time... 1005 01:16:04,840 --> 01:16:06,899 with the FBI's organized crime unit. 1006 01:16:06,975 --> 01:16:09,739 I'm intimately knowledgeable with the seedy... 1007 01:16:09,811 --> 01:16:12,473 workings of the Mob in the midwest section of this country. 1008 01:16:13,515 --> 01:16:15,915 I know a gangland slaying when I see one, 1009 01:16:15,984 --> 01:16:19,784 and that's exactly what this baby is. 1010 01:16:19,855 --> 01:16:22,483 I'd look into it myself personally, 1011 01:16:22,557 --> 01:16:24,923 but I got a date tonight. 1012 01:16:32,200 --> 01:16:34,430 Attention, Target shoppers. 1013 01:17:22,150 --> 01:17:24,448 Jim? 1014 01:18:18,540 --> 01:18:20,974 He is so cool! 1015 01:19:03,851 --> 01:19:06,945 # Got my ray-bans on every day and night # 1016 01:19:07,020 --> 01:19:10,387 # Got a one-track mind that I wanna hide # 1017 01:19:10,457 --> 01:19:13,756 # Got an easy job that I try to keep # 1018 01:19:13,827 --> 01:19:17,160 # Got a bunch of giris and I got 'em cheap # 1019 01:19:17,231 --> 01:19:20,598 # Got a million things that I wanna do # 1020 01:19:20,667 --> 01:19:24,694 # But I waste my time hangin' out with you # 1021 01:19:24,772 --> 01:19:28,208 # It's not because I'm really easy to please # 1022 01:19:28,275 --> 01:19:31,574 # It's not the way you bring me down on my knees # 1023 01:19:31,645 --> 01:19:34,614 # It's just a feeling but it keeps coming back # 1024 01:19:34,681 --> 01:19:37,013 # It's a tiny little heart attack # 1025 01:19:41,422 --> 01:19:44,448 # Got a big guitar lookin' dynamite # 1026 01:19:44,525 --> 01:19:47,756 # Got a Thunderbird that I drive all night # 1027 01:19:47,828 --> 01:19:51,355 # Got a shoeshine boy working overtime # 1028 01:19:51,432 --> 01:19:54,526 # Gotta grow up soon but I never mind # 1029 01:19:54,601 --> 01:19:58,002 # Got a big fat guy takin' all the blame # 1030 01:19:58,071 --> 01:20:02,132 # For the chairs I break when you call my name # 1031 01:20:02,209 --> 01:20:05,610 # It's not because I'm really easy to please # 1032 01:20:05,679 --> 01:20:08,978 # It's not the way you bring me down on my knees # 1033 01:20:09,049 --> 01:20:11,779 # It's just a feeling but it keeps coming back # 1034 01:20:11,852 --> 01:20:14,946 # It's a tiny little heart attack # 1035 01:20:15,022 --> 01:20:18,423 # Just a tiny little heart attack # 1036 01:20:49,523 --> 01:20:52,583 # Got a snakeskin suit that I really like # 1037 01:20:52,659 --> 01:20:55,924 # Lookin' like the devil on a Friday night # 1038 01:20:55,996 --> 01:20:59,329 # Got a shark outside in the swimming pool # 1039 01:20:59,399 --> 01:21:02,766 # But there won't be trouble if you're stayin' cool # 1040 01:21:02,836 --> 01:21:06,169 # Got my mind made up that I'm leavin' you # 1041 01:21:06,240 --> 01:21:10,404 # But it won't be easy No, it won't be true # 1042 01:21:40,474 --> 01:21:43,773 # Got a snakeskin suit that I really like # 1043 01:21:43,844 --> 01:21:46,972 # Lookin' like the devil on a Friday night # 1044 01:21:47,047 --> 01:21:50,574 # Got a shark outside in the swimming pool # 1045 01:21:50,651 --> 01:21:53,916 # But there won't be trouble if you're stayin' cool # 1046 01:21:53,987 --> 01:21:57,286 # Got my mind made up that I'm leavin' you # 1047 01:21:57,357 --> 01:22:01,487 # But it won't be easy No, it won't be true # 1048 01:22:01,562 --> 01:22:04,861 # I'll never make it through a Saturday night # 1049 01:22:04,932 --> 01:22:08,265 # I'll never make another move in the lights # 1050 01:22:08,335 --> 01:22:11,065 # 'Cause if I see you and you're lookin' like that # 1051 01:22:11,138 --> 01:22:15,097 # I'll get a tiny little heart attack # 1052 01:22:15,175 --> 01:22:18,576 # It's not because I'm really easy to please # 1053 01:22:18,645 --> 01:22:21,910 # It's not the way you bring me down on my knees # 1054 01:22:21,982 --> 01:22:24,746 # It's just a feeling but it keeps coming back # 1055 01:22:24,818 --> 01:22:27,946 # It's a tiny little heart attack # 1056 01:22:28,021 --> 01:22:31,354 # Give me a tiny little heart attack # 1057 01:22:31,425 --> 01:22:34,394 # Give me a tiny little heart attack # 1058 01:22:34,461 --> 01:22:38,158 # I want a tiny little heart attack # 1059 01:22:38,231 --> 01:22:41,359 # Give me a tiny little heart attack # 1060 01:22:41,435 --> 01:22:45,769 # I want a tiny little heart attack ## 78734

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