All language subtitles for Trump Launches Prescription Drug Website, Plans to Resurrect Christopher Columbus Statue [15D8g2kqUv8]

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Original subtitles

Thank you very much. Enjoy yourself. Welcome, everybody. Welcome, welcome,

welcome to The Tonight Show.

You're here. This is it.

This is the show.

Well, guys, earlier tonight, President Trump launched his new prescription drug

website, TrumpRx.

Yeah. Yeah.

Now you're able to buy Xanax from the reason you need Xanax.

That's right, Trump Rx is the only pharmacy where the dosage instructions

lot of people are saying two.

A lot of people are saying two.

Well, get this, it says that Trump plans to install a statue of Christopher

Columbus at the White House.

Apparently, Trump's a big fan of Columbus because 1492 is also his

Oh.

Well, guys, tomorrow night is the Winter Olympics opening ceremony, yeah?

Here on NBC.

And speed skater Aaron Jackson and bobsledder Frank Del Duca will be the

bearers for Team USA.

Aaron says she's thrilled, while Frank said it'll be tough to perform without

three other guys pressed against him.

It's like, turn.

Turn.

Meanwhile, I read that the women's hockey team in Finland is dealing with a

norovirus outbreak.

Oh.

Right now, everyone in Doubles Rouge is like, if that's true, then we're

screwed. I mean...

We definitely have it. Guys, this has been one of the coldest winters on

But, hey, there's no reason to fret because Valentine's Day is just around

corner. Yeah. And here to help us, to show us how to celebrate during the cold

is resident R &B duo Dirk and Sammy. Welcome to the show, guys.

Thank you for having us, Jimmy.

Peace and love.

Thank you. Yeah.

So you guys have some romantic advice for us, correct?

Oh, yeah. Not just advice.

But a little song.

Oh, great. Let's hear it.

Hey, baby.

It's looking frightful out there.

What do you say we get inside and get a little freaky?

It's time to get freaky in the winter.

I need you to keep me warm.

Don't need no heat when you're with me. So let's wait out the storm.

First, I'm going to take my coat off.

Shake off all the snow. That's right. Then I'm going to take my scarf off,

it on the floor.

Oh, yeah.

Next, I'm going to take my sweater off and the turtleneck underneath.

Then my vest and my hoodie and my cardigan. And now it's time for you and

get freaked out.

Hey, guys, sorry, sorry, sorry.

It's just, I know.

It's just a lot of layers of clothing you got there.

Yeah, it's cold, Jimmy. There's a feels like of like minus 100 degrees outside.

Yeah, I don't think it's that cold.

Not when you're with us. Can we please continue with our song?

Okay, go ahead.

Now let's take our gloves off. Well, they're actually kind of tight.

to bite them all. One finger at a time. Like this.

Can you help?

Forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it.

Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys.

Maybe this wasn't the best idea. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Why? We know

what we're doing.

You haven't given any advice. You're thinking about wearing too many clothes.

The song doesn't end like that, we promise.

Yeah, will you let us finish? There's only 17 minutes left.

17 minutes.

Hit it. Hit it.

We're back in.

Let's go.

Now that I got my gloves on, why don't you sit down and relax?

Because I got 12 more layers on my legs than the lips up from the back. All

right, that is enough. That's enough, okay?

Dirk and Sam, everybody.

All right, thank you.

Fighting the gloves off.

Well, some big movie news. Apple might make a sequel to their hit film F1. Oh.

In fact, they just released a teaser.

Check it out.

Audiences loved F1, so we're proud to bring you the sequel, F2. Wait, that

doesn't make sense. The sport is still called F1. We're proud to bring you the

sequel, F1 -2.

No, that's confusing.

The sequel, FF1. No.

2F2 -1. No. What's the F? No. F me? No. F you? No. F1 the way of water? No. F

for good? No. FML, just call it Brad Pitt car movie. Coming next F1. Yeah, it

looks good. I'm excited about that. That was good.

And finally, this summer, Disney is letting couples get married on the steps

the Haunted Mansion.

Ooh. It sounds like fun to your wedding night when you hear your wife singing

It's a Small World. We have a great show.

Give it up for the real show.

Come on. Hang in there with me.

Come on. Hang in there with me.

Come on. Get it.

Oh, thank you very much.

Welcome to the show.

everybody. Be sure to tune in tomorrow night. We have a big show right after

Olympics opening ceremony.

Chris Hemsworth will be here.

Mr.

Beast will be here tomorrow night.

We'll have a performance from Lil Uzi Vert will be here. Lil Uzi Vert. Plus

we've got Nick Jonas and a lot of surprises tomorrow night after the

It's going to be good. But first...

What a show we have for you tonight. She is an Oscar -winning actress who stars

in the new movie Crime 101, which opens in theaters February 13th. Halle Berry

is here tonight.

Come on now.

Love Halle Berry.

Plus, you can see him in the number one movie in the country right now, Send

Help. He also stars in and executive produced the film Twinless, which is

streaming right now on Hulu. Dylan O 'Brien is joining us.

Plus, he is the Oscar -nominated director, producer, co -editor, and co

of Marty Supreme.

Very talented. Josh Safdie is here tonight!

Marty Supreme!

And we got great music tonight from the legends, hip -hop legends, De La Soul!

Cabin in the Sky is the record. It is so good.

Love that.

Guys, I'm so excited because Super Bowl 60 is happening this Sunday. You got

Seattle Seahawks facing off against the New England Patriots.

Now, as you know, after the game, they give out awards like Most Valuable

Player, but they also give out awards before the game, too.

Yeah, I'll show you what I mean. It's time for tonight's show, Superlative.

we go.

Our first player is from the Patriots. It's their quarterback, Drake May.

He was voted most likely to stand outside Hollister with his shirt off.

Next up from the Seahawks is Sam Darnold.

Yeah.

He was voted most likely to bleed milk.

Oh, he needs a tan. Rare award.

No, very white, very white. Up next from the Patriots is Eptin Cheatham III.

He was voted most likely to get third place in an Amish Chris Martin look

contest.

That's a tough contest.

Wow, that's very tough.

Competition's tough. Yeah.

Next up from the Seahawks is Cooper Cup.

He was voted ramen noodle -iest.

Next up from the Patriots is Robert Spillane.

No. No. He was voted most likely to wear Trojan brand hats.

No, they made hats. Wow.

Excel.

Rib for his place. Next up in the Seahawks is Jalen

Sundell. He was voted most likely to be what happens if Luke Combs, Jelly Roll,

and Kevin James run full speed into each other.

And finally, from the Patriots is Hunter Henry.

He was voted Temu Tom Brady. There you have it, everybody.

Those are your superlatives.

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