Original subtitles

Hey, you think Dad's there yet?

He ought to be arriving about now.

It's just an all-night trip.

How come he gets to go up to Silver Pines,

and we have to stay here and go to school?

'Cause he had to go away for a few days.

Why? 'Cause he needs some rest.

Why?

Chip, when you grow up,

your nervous system won't take the pounding any more.

The world closes in around you;

you become mentally claustrophobic,

and you have to find a way to release your tensions.

In other words, he's pooped.

Well, I sure hope he has good weather.

You know, this is the off-season up there.

Well, Dad said he didn't care if he just had

to sit there and stare at the four walls,

so long as he got plenty of peace and quiet.

Why didn't he just go down and sit in the basement?

You'll have to carry your own baggage upstairs.

My help deserves a vacation after a real busy season.

Yeah, I'm sure they do.

Well, it's just a little quiet after Labor Day, isn't it?

I figure people who sneak up here after rates change

aren't exactly entitled to the same

luxuries as folks who pay full prices.

No, no.

Look, I, uh... I just came up here to sit.

I didn't even bring my fishing gear.

All I want is a little peace and quiet,

so, uh, don't worry about the niceties.

I won't.

Top of the stairs, to the left.

Thank you.

Neighbor, I know just how you feel.

If that's not a sight

to lift the frosting off Grandma's cake,

there ain't a car in Detroit.

It's really something to see.

Ed Wallace, Grand Lakes Tool and Die Company.

Oh, yeah. My name's Steve Douglas.

Uh, no need to tell me who you are.

When Cheerful Charlie downstairs told me

you were coming, I checked your credentials.

Well.

Douglas, you're my kind of people.

I am?

Uh, me and the missus... We're nature worshippers, too.

Well, I wouldn't exactly say that I'm...

Last March it was.

I handed my desk over to my plant manager.

"Sid", says I, "you run the business.

"I'm taking six months leave.

"Time I had a look at this country

that's been so good to me."

Yes, sir, just like that.

Is that so?

Wait till Fran hears I dug up somebody to pair her off with.

You what? She was worried about intruding on Rusty and me.

Rusty's the wife.

But with you along, it's a quartet now.

Can't make faces at that.

With me along?

You ate yet? No, no, I-I just got here.

See how fate arranges things?

How do you mean?

Well, Rusty and me got

a little picnic outing ready to blast off.

Don't need to bring a thing but your fishing gear

and an eager stomach.

Well, it's very nice of you to invite me, Mr. Wallace.

Call me Ed.

Well, Ed, I didn't even bring a rod this trip...

Oh, that's all right.

I've got enough for both of us.

Oh. You've got a fishing license, haven't you?

Well, yes, I have a license, but I...

Well, that settles it.

Great gal, Fran.

Real people.

More fun than a kick in the head.

She, uh... she sounds very nice,

but, uh, well, maybe some other...

Well, I just told you.

Fran won't come unless there's four of us.

You ain't gonna let her down?

Let her down?! I don't even know her.

All the more reason for hooking on.

Be a mean thing to spoil the day of a total stranger, right?

Well, I hadn't looked at it in quite that way,

but, uh, well, I-I haven't even unpacked, Ed.

I... Well, get with it, buddy boy.

Wait for you in the lobby.

Lucky break, your turning up when you did.

Arrived any later, you might have missed us.

That's right.

The same thought just crossed my mind.

Hi, Steve. Ed.

All right, in back of me, here's the little woman.

Oh. How do you do?

Rusty, this is Steve Douglas.

Drink lots of water.

I beg your pardon?

You've got a mild liver condition.

Shows in your eyes.

Stay away from spices for a while, too.

Rusty, uh,

went steady with an intern before she married me.

Oh.

That's got it, Princess.

While we're

on the subject, no charge for the first treatment.

No, no, thanks.

I, uh... I feel fine.

Fran'll be down in a minute.

She's upstairs, slapping on a little man-trap.

She just wiggled all over when we told her about you.

She did?

You've got nice bone structure.

Oh, thank you.

I'll tell you, uh, as long as she isn't here,

why don't I just take a rain check,

and maybe some other time...?

Here she comes!

Fran, this is Steve Douglas.

Steve, Fran Borden.

How do you do, Mr. Douglas?

How-how do you do?

Any calls for me?

Was only last night you talked to Glenville.

I'm aware of that.

What I'm trying to find out is,

have there been any calls for me this morning?

I would have told you.

Silver Pines Lodge.

She, uh, just wiggled all over when you told her about me, hmm?

She did.

Call for you.

Not you. Him.

Oh.

Thank you. Hello?

Oh, hi, Bub.

What's wrong?

Why should anything be wrong?

I just called to see if you got up there all right.

Oh, yeah, yeah, I had a good trip, Bub.

Say, how are the boys?

All three of them fell down the stairs

and broke five out of six legs.

Come on, Bub, I asked you a simple question, and...

And I'm giving you a simple answer.

So, I put all five of the broken legs

into the same cast,

just to save money, you know.

Oh, now, cut it out, now.

Now, look,

Steve, you went up there to get away from us, so do it.

Yeah, I guess you're right, Bub.

I'll, uh, drop you all a card.

So long.

Everything okay?

Oh, yes, everything's fine.

Swell. Tell you what I'm gonna do.

I'm gonna let you carry some of my camera equipment.

All right.

How does that grab you?

I don't know.

I've never been grabbed by any camera equipment.

How about having our picnic right here?

Well, there's no point in it when we got a stream full

of trout waiting for us up at Chippewa Creek.

Oh. How far is that?

Well, this Indian we met said

it was just over the next hill yonder.

First Indian I ever saw with sinus trouble.

Oh. Well,

why don't we stop for a rest then?

Maybe Miss Borden is tired.

Call her Fran.

Oh, thank you.

I'm not tired.

Let's go.

You ain't making the right moves, boy.

Men don't get to first base

unless he honey-talks a girl a little.

Tell her she's got nice bone structure.

Well, for one thing,

uh, she doesn't want to be honey-talked.

Sure she does, right, Princess?

She's a woman, isn't she?

Hear that?

It's deep stuff, Steve.

Wait-wait a minute. I'll unhook you.

Never mind. I've got it.

Hark!

Could have sworn I heard the mating call

of a speckled fan tail.

Hey, what's the matter with this place for a picnic?

It looks like a perfect site to me.

No, sir. There's trout ahead.

Trout as big as tuna, swimming in a creek

that ain't been fished in 60 years.

Look at that view, Princess.

Ain't that a grabber?

Shall we go?

Sure thing.

Steve.

Next stop, Chippewa Creek.

I don't understand.

He said over the hill.

This is, uh, about where

your Indian friend said it ought to be, huh?

Oh, he said we should practically be standing in it!

Ed, I have a hunch that's just what we're doing.

You mean the creek's dried up?

I don't think it'll ever get any drier.

Oh, this is the end.

Oh, now, Daddy, it's not the end of the world.

No, of course not.

Well, as long as we can't do any fishing,

we might as well eat, huh?

That's right.

At least we still got our appetites.

And it isn't as though we were stranded

out here without any provisions.

No.

Well, um...

Well, Ed was so sure that he was gonna catch a fish

that I didn't think it was necessary

to pack any sandwiches.

Won't be the most well-balanced meal you ever

put away, but after all,

it's the spirit of a picnic that counts.

Right, gang?

Right.

Ah.

There you are.

Butter for frying the trout, salt, pepper,

and there's the fattest bottle of ketchup

you'll see this side of Racine.

That's it?

Saved the best for last.

Olives.

Care for fried olives smothered in ketchup?

Yes.

Four olives left.

We'd better keep those for emergency rations.

It's a long way back to the lodge,

and, uh, it's getting a little late.

I wonder where that man of mine has gotten himself to.

I believe he's out taking pictures

with his Watanabe G-19 Telephoto.

Well... I guess I'll try and collect him.

You know, uh, that last speech of yours makes, in all,

67 words you've spoken since we left the lodge.

Oh, you counted, did you?

Oh, it was nothing.

Anything up to a hundred, I'm a counting fool.

Rusty told me that you, uh, wiggled, uh...

Well, that you were rather pleased

that I was coming along on this trip.

I, uh, must say it doesn't show.

Mr. Douglas, my mother and I run a small girls' school.

The job is time-consuming.

And my moments of carefree leisure,

infrequently scattered over the year,

are precious to me.

Well, that makes two of us.

No, that makes four of us, and there's the rub.

If it weren't for you, I'd be back at the lodge,

lolling on the sundeck, a book in one hand

and a frosted beverage in the other.

You're the reason

that I was conscripted on this, uh, death march.

I am?

Before you came,

there were three of us, and three,

as I pointed out to the Wallaces, is a crowd.

With your arrival, my defenses collapsed,

and we were a tidy foursome.

Now, under the circumstances,

you can't blame me for receiving you

with less than unbridled ecstasy.

You find that amusing, do you?

Yes, I do, because, uh...

Well, I don't suppose it's occurred to you

that I might feel exactly the same way.

No.

You mean they...?

He caught me right on my own balcony.

Ed hardly gave me a chance to change clothes.

Oh, that's funny.

Have an olive.

No, thank you.

It's bad for my liver.

Rusty told me that I... Oh.

Hey, kids, shot some great color stuff!

I'll send you guys some prints when I get them developed.

Good. Better get our gear together, kitty.

By the time we make it back to the lodge,

we'll be ready to hit the sack. Want to get a good

night's sleep so we can get an early start in the morning.

Early start in the morning?

Well, didn't think I'd let it go at this?

My fault everything turned up lemons today,

but I'm gonna square it with you, yes, sir.

Tomorrow I'm building you a day

you can paste in your scrapbooks.

Don't look now, but I think my hair just turned white.

I suppose it's asking too much

to hope that we might find a shorter way back to the lodge?

If there were a shorter way, I would have used it.

Any way you slice it,

we're a good nine miles from civilization.

Here, let me help you with that stuff.

I got the rod. All right, now, watch it.

This is wild country.

Help me, darling. All right.

I've got everything.

Hark!

I think I heard a moose.

Hey, hurry up, there's a whole herd of moose up here.

Operator. Rusty sent me over

to make sure you hit the sack early.

Uh, just a minute.

I'm talking to home, and we were cut off.

Operator.

Operator, we were cut off.

W-Would you call the number back?

I'd like to have a nickel for every time

I've been cut off on a long-distance call.

It'd reach from here to the suburbs of Chillicothe.

I'm sorry, the line is busy.

But Operator, the line can't be busy.

I was just talking to them.

It's no use, Steve, I've been all through this before.

Be quicker if I got that Indian with the sinus trouble

to send up smoke signals.

Yeah.

No, no, never mind, Operator, thank you.

I'll try again tomorrow.

Bye.

Set your alarm for 5:30.

Gives your blood that old zing,

getting started while it's still dark.

5:30?!

Uh... ju-ju-just a minute.

5:00.

Coming.

Oh, hello, Rusty.

Steve, I don't know quite how to say this to you.

I-I don't either.

I-I tell you, I didn't set my alarm on purpose. I...

W-We're going to have to cancel out on you today.

Ed's been up half the night

with one of his bilious attacks.

He was?

It was all the excitement of yesterday.

He doesn't know the meaning of the word "moderation."

No, no, he, he does give of himself, doesn't he?

To the hilt.

I just woke up Fran and told her.

She's very upset.

Oh, I-I'm sure she is.

Is there anything we can do?

No. It just has to run its course.

It's a shame to ruin your day like this.

Oh, now, don't you worry about that.

We'll... we'll find some way to amuse ourselves.

Now, Robbie, he's the, uh,

he's the one with the musical ear.

He was just the opposite.

What did I do?

We've both been doing it.

Do you realize we haven't said one word

that hasn't involved our children?

No, you're wrong.

I distinctly remember saying good morning.

I'll make a pact with you.

We're on an island, and that removes us

from the rest of the world.

Now, no more talk about kids or Ed and his princess,

just island talk, huh?

Fine.

Did anybody ever tell you you have nice bone structure?

Yes.

I'll get those.

Okay.

Any of your girls go through the "going steady" stage yet?

Oh, dear, yes, my oldest one.

Seven times she's been in love,

and seven times we've cried together.

Cried together?

Well, yes, of course.

Only one thing to do when love flies out the window,

and that's cry about it with your mother.

But aren't you glad they want to share things with you?

In a way, they're a little like Ed and Rusty Wallace,

I suppose.

How do you mean?

Well, there isn't anything

that they wouldn't do to, to win our approval,

and yet they deny us the right to privacy.

Anything that excludes them is a,

is a threat to their security.

They just don't understand that we can't give 100%.

Everybody needs an occasional island.

They'd like you.

Who would? The boys.

Oh, well, by a not-so-odd coincidence,

I was... I've been thinking

about how my girls might react to you.

Were you?

Even before the princess told me

to notice your bone structure.

Ed warned us that this island was enchanted.

I guess he was right.

Steve, Fran, hello there!

Well, we, uh, should have strewn a minefield.

What did I tell you, Princess?

Here they are.

I'll bet you gave up on us, huh?

Figured that bilious attack

had knocked me out of the ball game.

Not me.

I spring back like a new girdle, right, Princess?

It was really your concern

that pried him out of his sickbed.

Why, when I told him

how disappointed you were,

you couldn't have kept him down with a tent stake.

Caught a poisson, huh?

That's French for "fish."

Yeah, yeah, we got one nice bass.

Well, Steve, I told you

I'd make it up to you, didn't I?

A day to pin medals on, that's what I promised.

Well, sir, I'm here to deliver.

What do you say to that, huh?

Well, don't rush me, Ed. I'll, I'll think of something.

He'll think of something.

You kill me.

A cold shower will perk us all up.

We'll meet in the game room in 15 minutes.

Rusty and me will take you two on at a game of Ping-Pong,

and I'd better warn you now,

the little lady has got a vicious backhand.

Sic transit gloria mundi.

Allow me.

Uh-huh.

Have there been any calls for me, Mr. Mac Ivers?

You're sure?

I ain't left the lobby all day.

Well, were there any calls for me?

Nope, and don't ask me if I'm sure

'cause, like I told him, I've been here all day.

Well... You were about to remark?

Well, I guess the lines must be out of order, that's all.

Now, remember, we want this to look natural.

Loosen up, folks.

That's it, now you got it.

Relax.

Now, hold it just like that.

Don't move, be right with you.

There, that's got it.

Cut.

Take another one, Daddy.

Oh, no time, Princess.

It's 9:00 now, and we've got to make Twin Falls by sundown.

I wish we weren't on such a tight schedule.

Sure would like to stick around

and swap a lick or two more with you folks.

Well, maybe next time, Ed.

You can... Next time?

You know when that'll be?

We were 17 years waiting for this.

That's how long it took us to pry loose.

When it comes to saying good-bye,

Daddy's just like a kid.

Busts him apart every time.

He'll be all day trying to get his stomach back in place.

I guess I come on pretty strong at times,

but we got no kids, no family waiting for us,

just the job, the old grind,

and buster, it sure chews up the days.

You watch your life sliding by

like it belonged to somebody else.

I guess it does, at that.

It belongs to the Grand Lakes Tool and Die Company.

But I'll tell you something.

You listening, Steve, Fran?

We're listening, Ed.

We've had our good time, squeezed every drop out of it,

and you two, well, you've been the cherry on the sundae.

You opened up to a couple of strangers, you shared.

That's the best anyone can do; you did it.

I don't know about your scrapbook, but mine's bulging.

I can't think of a solitary reason

why either of you should ever pass through River Ridge,

but if you do, I want you to know

there's one door that's standing open, day or night.

Thanks, Ed.

Bye, Steve. Good-bye.

Good-bye, Ed.

Good-bye. Rusty.

Sure do envy you two.

Next couple of days, you're going

to have this all to yourselves.

Don't forget now, drink lots of water.

Bye-bye! Bye.

Bye.

Good-bye.

Now, how tall do you feel now, Mr. Douglas?

About two inches high... and still shrinking.

Steve, maybe I'm a coward, but, but I-I just can't.

Look, let's face it, they haven't called.

The plain truth of the matter is that my kids are surviving

very nicely without me, and it's killing me.

I'm going back.

And I thought we were kindred spirits.

Oh, all right, go on, say anything you like,

but maybe you just have more character than I,

but I'm driving back right now.

Well, we'll, uh, see each other again.

Yes.

Well, I... guess I'd better get started packing.

Looks like you'll have the place all to yourself now.

Yes, it, uh, looks that way.

Mr. Douglas.

I checked on train schedules like you asked.

There's one out at 2:00 this afternoon.

What was that, Mr. Mac Ivers?

He asked me to check on trains,

so I did, and you heard what I told him.

Did I say you had more character than I?

Well, I have a little more.

I'm not leaving till 2:00.

Mr. Douglas, you are a phony.

I know.

Well, as long as my pride is gone entirely,

how about hitching a ride back to town with you?

All right, but with one proviso.

What's that?

No more talk about kids.

It's a promise.

Oh. Oh.

You know, that reminds me

when Mike was about nine years old,

he fell down the stairs, except from the top,

and he fell all the way down, never got a scratch.

That's a funny thing; the same thing happened to Christine.

Really?