Original subtitles

- I wasn't there. - You were there.

I wasn't.

Somebody saw you.

Who? A private detective?

You were in Tony's club. Just admit it, that's all I want you to do.

Oh, God!

Alright, I was in Tony's club.

With a man.

Well, I hope he was.

It's the same man you were out with last week, isn't it?

Does it matter to you?

Ah, it's a lovely morning.

We should go into the country.

Walk.

Oh, I hate walking.

Except to pubs.

You go to sleep, Ilsa, it's late.

I'm going home.

Joe.

Yeah?

Put the milk inside the door on your way out.

Some maniac keeps pinching it.

Breakdown on the Central Line again, Mr Beckett?

Yeah, that's right.

It won't do, Mr Beckett.

It's not good enough.

I set off at half past eight, Mr Royce.

Then we'll have to set off just that little bit earlier.

Business in this establishment commences at 9:00am.

We don't require you here at ten to,

but we don't expect you here at ten past.

Nine o'clock.

Oh, shut up.

And we don't wear coloured shirts during business hours, Mr Beckett.

Whatever we may do outside.

Alright, Mr Fenton.

Good morning, sir.

I was wanting a sports jacket.

Certainly, sir. Would you come this way?

Let's have the phone a minute, Mrs Richards.

- Could I, uh, try this one? - Certainly, sir.

You go too far, Joe.

You spoil it for everybody else.

You know he's watching you.

And the loose fitting style does give that extra degree of comfort.

Could I speak to Ilsa, please?

Forward, Mr Beckett, forward.

Never mind.

Oh, it seems alright, but it's more the sleeves that's my worry.

- Morning. - I was wondering about a raincoat.

Mm.

You need a large size. A...

46, 48.

I was thinking of single-breasted this time.

Quite easily. If you'd come this way.

There's nothing off the peg your size. I could make you one to measure though?

- I want it for the weekend. - —I'm sorry, nothing near it.

I'd better try somewhere else then.

What happened there?

Nothing to fit him.

Complete range of lightweight Chesterfields.

- He didn't want an overcoat. - He wasn't shown an overcoat.

Neither did we show him our pattern books. Bespoke, Mr Beckett, bespoke.

Head office directives, push bespoke trading.

Look, the man came in for a raincoat off the peg.

We hadn't got one.

Hadn't got it. Hadn't got it. What are we, Mr Beckett?

Salesmen, salesmen! There's no such word as "haven't got".

Show me a flaming 48 raincoat!

If you would call back as late as possible on Friday, sir.

We'll have it ready for you.

Friday, yes, alright. Thank you very much.

Thank you.

Good morning, sir.

Well, gentlemen, I calculate that Mr Beckett

has lost us all the commission

on a firm £12 order this morning.

I'm giving in my notice.

Oh.

I want to leave on Friday.

Pastures new?

- Found another job? - No.

I advise you to learn something about hard work before moving on, Mr Beckett.

You don't advance yourself by jumping from job to job.

Alright, alright. I'm inefficient, habitually late and bone idle.

Let's not go on about it, shall we?

I've told you, I'm finished on Friday.

You're finished now. Get out.

Get out of my shop.

Good morning, sir.

Good morning.

I want you to show me a regimental tie.

Certainly, sir.

Which regiment do you want?

What regiments have you got?

Thank you.

Hey, that's my coffee!

May I?

Yeah, sure.

Now where have I seen you before?

- Oh, yes, the drifter. - Eh?

I had a grandstand view from the shelf counter.

Oh.

You were quite right to leave that establishment, no class.

All they could offer me was the Pioneer Corps.

You're lucky to have got out without a three-piece suit

and a couple of raincoats.

That would be a shilling.

- What'll be a shilling? - The coffee.

You should have paid at the desk. Self-service.

Progress.

Alas. Keep the change.

Thank you.

You know, sometimes I admire my own self restraint.

They've been open seven minutes and I'm drinking coffee.

No doubt you have a tempting job to go to?

No, I'm trying to give it up.

Good morning, Captain.

Good morning.

I'm surprised to see you upright.

Oh, we recover, Frank. We recover.

He had the one last night.

He was only drinking whisky out of jug, that's all.

That's why it's gin today.

By the way, I'm Captain Dyce. Richard Dyce.

Joe Beckett.

Do you know, you chaps fascinate me.

Do you really enjoy working in shops?

All that toadying and grovelling?

What jobs are there?

I've tried a few I thought I'd like

but they're no good when you get close to them.

Now I pick lousy jobs deliberately.

If I found a good one I'd probably stay in it and settle down.

That would just about be the end.

I know what you mean.

End up at 50 in a suburban semi,

married to some fat old slag with a gang of snotty nosed infants.

I never keep any job for more than a couple of months.

The thought of working in some of these places

depresses me so much I stay in bed.

I stay in bed so long there's no point in going in.

What's the date?

Er, don't know. Fifth, I think.

You live by yourself, don't you?

Mm, Notting Hill Gate.

- Ah, West 11. - I have a room there.

Furnished?

I suppose you'd call it furnished.

I've been in this one for about three months now.

She leaves me alone, anyway, the land lady. It's warm.

Yes, I can imagine, hob and gas fire, shilling in the meter.

Sink choked with tea leaves.

And use of bath.

It's not that bad. I'm on my own, anyway.

I'm independent.

Yes, I know what your sort of independence means, my dear boy.

Counting your pennies all week

then skulking in bed all Sunday because you can't afford to go out.

You haven't got the guts to seize life by the throat

and take what you want.

And you have, I suppose?

- Yes. - You just take what you want?

Does it matter?

Not to me, churn.

I don't care where you get your money.

The life of crime doesn't shock you?

Should it?

I mean, it's not always for gain, is it?

A lot of it's boredom.

Crime can be a way of breaking out, a way of feeling something.

Anything's better than nothing.

I like you, Joe.

You won't settle for anything.

The army ruined me for a civilian life, you know.

Sometimes I wish there'd be another war. I'd enlist like a shot.

The next war will be a nuclear war.

That's why I support nuclear disarmament.

Not that I'm a pale-faced pacifist but I don't want any war

that has no place for me in it.

Let's have another one.

We might have a look round and enjoy the clubs if you have nothing special on?

No, I'm alright till tonight.

Supposed to be going to a party.

Lovely. I like parties.

Squashed my nut!

Now, shall I tell you who the greatest novelist of the century is?

You squashed my nut!

A little-known Victorian novelist called Mrs Brooks.

Now, this may surprise you but I...

I suppose you could say I went to bed with him.

I certainly never slept with him...

Honestly, dear, I've seen some places in my time...

Another one? How many have you got now?

- You've got half a dozen already. - Yes, but I collect them.

Er...

who's he?

- With Georgia? - Yes.

He's new, ain't he?

Well, if you don't know him, he must be.

Mind you, he ain't new.

I've seen him.

What's the drink situation?

Slightly dodgy, I'm afraid.

We'll be onto rose' or fruit cup or whatever it is before long.

There must be some other people about besides this lot?

I dunno, I never seem to meet them.

Perhaps you don't move around.

Never do anything else. We just move around together.

Same cafés, same parties.

We share the same bottles and the same beds.

Cheers.

Here's to a new face.

Well, we're sharing the same bottle.

Darling, what about you?

I see little Ilsa's playing the field again.

- Who's our lascivious friend? - Oh, some creep.

I think he's a copper's narc or something.

Go on, stare.

I've got nice legs, haven't I?

Would you like me to take my dress off so you can get a better look?

Go on, tell me to and I will. Cos that's what you want, isn't it?

Who invited him anyway?

Who invited anybody, darling?

Give me a cigarette, Joe.

- You haven't said hello to me yet. - Hello.

You keeping alright?

Yeah, fine. You?

Ah! Marvellous.

I feel a bit drunk though. Does it show?

Does it matter?

Oh. Give me alight, Freddie.

Ah, just keeping your place warm for you, old boy.

Oh, is that a loving cup you've got there, my dear?

- Has he gone off with all that Scotch? - Mmm-hmm.

Nobody loves us.

Still, never mind.

We love each other, don't we, Joe?

Yeah, Georgia. We love each other.

I'm getting a bit stoned.

So am I.

Are you staying till the bitter end?

I am stoned.

You could do anything you like with me now, Joe.

Anything you wanted to.

NOW?

Now if you like.

Come on then, let's go.

Just get my coat.

Won't be a minute.

Excuse me.

Leaving, Joe?

Yeah, but it's open house.

You can stay.

Isn't she a bit out of your age group, old boy?

I'm not fussy.

Matter of fact, I had designs on her myself.

Well, hard luck, mate.

First come, first served.

Tell you what I'll do.

I'll fight you for her.

Oh, come off it.

No, seriously.

Come on, Joe. Come on. Hit me.

Hit me here, hard.

Don't talk bloody ridiculous.

Come on, Joe. You won't hurt me.

It's all hard muscle. There's no fat here, you know.

Alright. I believe it.

What you afraid of, Joe?

I'm not afraid, I just think it's all bloody stupid.

Come on.

I won't.

You will, you know. I was trained to command.

People like me give orders.

People like you obey them.

Come on, darling. I've got refills.

I've had about enough of you.

Never mind, Joe. We'll leave it over.

What do you want anyway? I mean, what are you after?

Eventually customers for 10,000 tins of antifreeze,

going cheap as they say.

Immediately, a bed for the night.

Well, that's your problem, isn't it?

Yeah.

Joe, how serious were you this morning

when we mentioned crime and boredom?

I'm bored with you, mate. I dunno about anything else.

Oh, do you live by yourself, my lovely?

Huh?

Oh, no, with a friend.

Back to sleepies then.

Well then, Joe?

Look, you want Georgia, you can have her.

I'm going home. Goodnight.

See you again, Joe.

Come along, darling.

Ha, it's a lovely night.

I don't want you to think I do this sort of thing all the time.

Never crossed my mind. Taxi.

Check.

Oh, so you have emerged, Mr Beckett.

Really, I think you'd sleep through an earthquake.

Here, did you hear me calling you about two o'clock?

I thought you must be out.

No, I didn't hear anything.

Oh, that phone. It's been ringing and ringing and ringing.

That there lady, erm...

Well, that, erm, that Miss Barnes, you know.

Well, she said... Well, anyhow, she said she wouldn't ring you again

but would you meet her in the coffee bar after she's finished work?

Oh, right. Thanks.

Oh, and, erm, you won't let the rent run on too long, will you?

No, righto.

I mean, I have got the milk and the laundry to pay on Fridays.

Yes, right, OK.

I don't really like it left more than two weeks as a rule.

What'd you do that for then?

He cuts children into pieces and makes them into pies.

Good morning, Joe.

Morning, Mr Gash.

I must do something about my hair.

Nice of you to give me a lift.

Hope it keeps fine.

Think this colour will last the day out?

It's alright.

Here, you've cut yourself.

It's a long time since that razor was used.

They would spring a board meeting on me today of all days.

Do hate doing business in a crumpled shirt.

Well, if you'd been a good boy you'd have got up this morning

and gone home and changed.

I know, my love. I know.

But as I say, I've got the flat crawling with these beastly Americans.

I know it's my own property but one doesn't like to butt in.

I must come to some other arrangement.

Well, you know where you can come to get fixed up.

My goodness, the chairman's here already.

Er, I don't seem to have any change.

- Settle with you later. - See you.

Carry on.

My dear Aunt Mildred, I'm terribly sorry.

I got held up at this retched board meeting.

I thought it was never going to end.

How are you?

None the better for waiting 35 minutes.

I, really, am awfully sorry.

Who was that girl?

Oh, Georgia, my secretary.

Secretary?

Well, I'm saying my secretary, I share her with my partner, Joe Beckett.

You've met Joe of course.

Of course I haven't.

Oh, I was sure you had. Charming fellow.

Was in the clothing business. Made a packet there,

broke away, now we're building up this export business.

If we can land this Japanese order, we're in clover.

Dickie, you get more ridiculous every day.

How long are you in town for, Auntie?

No longer than I can help.

Captain Dyce? Telephone for you.

That'|| be Joe. Perhaps I could bring him down one weekend.

Captain Dyce here.

♪ Because they know that she's the dancing queen

Hello, Terry.

♪ Oh, just bebop, it's time to rock

♪ But she doesn't know when to stop

♪ But living life is fun with baby Jean

♪ Hit it now, pretty boys, go!

♪ Oh honey, go! a'

Very good. Very good. Go again?

No, that's enough.

Lend us your chess set then?

Oh, him.

Why doesn't he buy his own chess set?

Jimmy, haven't see you in years.

Hi, you two, see you later.

- Ilsa. - Alfie.

I promise faithfully, darling, I want to hear the whole thing.

I'm awfully late.

Looked in at the Cellar Club.

Oh, I wish you'd seen it.

Bob and George were there dancing together pretending to be queers.

Why you wearing those things?

Because I've got this simply bloody hangover from last night.

Where did you get to? I finished up in Hampstead.

Oh, who with?

Oh, not like that, darling.

I met this fabulous drip.

He said, "Would you like to come back to Hampstead?"

I said, "Marvellous," and off we went.

We got to his place, I didn't even get out of the cab.

Who was he anyway?

Oh, just somebody I've seen around.

Think he's in love with me.

But I get sick of him. You know how it is.

Yeah, I know.

I enjoy making a man fall in love with me.

Especially if he doesn't want to.

Then when I've got him, I go off him.

I can't stick dog-like devotion.

I've been a bit of a bitch to you, haven't I, Joe?

So-so.

I always am.

Then you didn't really love me, did you, darling?

Just pretended.

You just wanted the same as everyone else.

Only you made more of a fuss about getting it.

Darling, Joe.

I say, darling, you can't possibly lend me two pounds, can you?

You've got a nerve!

Oh, I know I've owed you five pounds for years but I must pay the rent.

I've seen these fabulous shoes I've just got to have them.

Come on, let's take a walk.

Thank you.

Queen to bishop third.

Mate in one, now I'll have my board back. Thank you.

He's clever.

He's like me. He's got it up here.

You shopped any good villains lately, Simon?

Now he's gone commercial...

Well, what he does...

Isn't it fabulous here? It's always so natural.

- Stop it, Joe. - What?

- You're to leave me alone. - Why?

Cos you get in my way, that's why.

- Well, I don't see that. - Well, I do.

Now what are you on about?

I mean, Joe, that if you don't like life, you avoid it.

You get all superior.

Sort of sour grapes.

But I'm different.

I like people loving me.

Admiring me.

Telling me I'm wonderful.

But you, Joe, you despise me.

You despise my friends and my amusements.

All the things that are necessary to me.

You just get in my way.

Yeah, well, I get you.

At least, I think I do.

I mean, we could still be platonic friends.

We could keep it a terrific secret between us.

We really love each other.

Oh, I must go.

Yep.

Are you in love with me, Joe?

Erm, yeah.

Then say it.

I love you, Ilsa.

Keep me safe, Joe.

Love me, look after me.

Darling, I promise, I faithfully swear that I'll always stay with you.

Get me a glass of water, darling. Sleep always makes me thirsty.

I wish you had a radio.

- Shall I get one? - Yeah.

"This is Radio Luxembourg. Your station of the stars."

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Push it down a bit, will ya?

They never sing low, Joe.

They would if they knew my landlady.

She doesn't allow visitors after 10:30.

Ah, what a drag.

Yes?

I'm sorry to trouble you but have you got a Mr Beckett staying here?

Er, yes.

Only I'm his mother.

Oh. Well, I think he's in.

Step inside, won't you? I'll just pop up first.

Such a long climb.

Oh, I shall be hours late for work. I know that much.

I'm sick of that dreary office.

Don't know why I don't do the same as you and walk out.

It makes no odds.

I've got to get another job sooner or later.

Yes, well, at least you get a rest from the dreary...

'Shh!

Mr Beckett?

Mr Beckett.

Oh, I just wanted to make sure you was in.

You've got a visitor.

It's your mother.

Oh, tell her I'll be down in a minute.

Alright, Mrs Beckett, right up to the top.

Come along, you can't keep your mother waiting all day, you know,

while you get yourself dressed.

What's more I hope your room's tidy.

Joe, wait a minute.

You can finish that in the bathroom.

Quick, there's no one around.

You should have advertised.

Go right upstairs, Mrs Beckett, as far as ever you can go.

Joe's expecting you.

Thank you.

In the bathroom, quick.

The door, it's locked.

Mum, why didn't you tell me you were coming?

I could have met you at the station.

Joe.

Oh, you're so thin, son.

What are you doing with yourself?

I thought, well, there's that early morning train.

I'll give him a surprise.

Yeah, it was a surprise.

That's the bathroom. I share that.

There's just one more flight, Mum.

- —Oh. - Oh?

Well, shall, shall I begin at the beginning or what?

Well, let's skip the beginning. Start later.

Oh, it's a bit of a mess. I haven't had much time.

Doesn't she clear up then? Make the bed?

Oh, yes, she would do if I asked her, you know, but I don't bother.

Anyway, she might give you a bit more carpet.

How much did you say you're paying?

Uh, £2.10.

Well, it's about average.

How are you then, Mum? Are you feeling better?

Well, you got my letter, didn't you?

You read it, didn't you?

Well, of course I did.

I thought you might of replied.

Yeah, well, I... I kept meaning to, you know,

but something always...

Well, I did read it though.

I was dead worried about it.

How's it now?

I mean, what'd the doctor say?

Come and give your mother a kiss.

J0ey, Joey.

Now, look, no, you don't want to stay up here.

- We'll get you a cup of tea, eh? - That'd be lovely.

Well, tell me all your news, Joe.

Well, you know, life goes on.

I saw Bernard de la Pol the other day.

Do you remember Bernard that you used to be at school with?

He's doing very well.

Do you remember he went to Redmont Engineering

where your father wanted you to go.

Well, apparently, he stayed there

and passed all his examinations,

and got on and everything.

And apparently, they're sending him abroad.

Oh, yeah?

Somewhere in the Middle East, er,

Mr de Ia Pol was saying.

With the firm.

Well, Joey.

Have you made any good friends while you've been in London?

Let's get some tea now, shall we?

Oh, I don't know.

Can't you make yourself a cup of tea?

They're always popping out for meals and cups of tea in London, aren't they?

Yeah, pop out for everything up here.

Do we pass a chemist on the way?

Because I've got some tablets to get.

Yes, we can do. We can call in at Boots.

Oh, I couldn't manage these stairs everyday.

Takes me all the time with one flight.

I don't really know you well enough.

You've known me for ten minutes, surely, that's enough.

Enough for what?

There you are, dear. Mummy's calling.

It's years since I was here last.

I brought you here when you were a little boy.

We'd been up to see your Aunt Alice at Hammersmith

and she was out.

How's she getting on then?

Well, I was hoping you'd have been over to see her.

But you say you're so busy.

Have you seen Father Hogan yet?

No.

I wish you could find time to see him, Joe.

Even if you don't get up and go to Mass.

After all, he only lives a few minutes from where you live.

And he was very kind to us before he moved up here.

Well, I will try to drop round and see him.

Oh, look at that little one. Isn't she sweet?

I'd liked to have been a granny.

I don't suppose I ever will be now.

Well, you never know.

Well, you will get married one day, won't you, Joe?

Will I?

Well, you want to, don't you?

No, not particularly.

Oh, don't talk silly, Joe.

All these ideas about not marrying

and free love or whatever you call it.

They're alright in books.

But there's nothing free about behaving like an alley cat.

You want a girl you can respect.

Not someone who lets you paw her about.

Because she'll let other fellas paw her about, too.

Yes, you can look at your watch.

You think you're alright now

but it's when you get to my age you'll know about it.

Finish up one of these dirty old men

going around nipping young girls' bottoms.

Yes, I can speak up. I can talk like your wonderful friends.

Alright, Mum.

Don't go on about it.

Oh, it wouldn't do to have me in London, would it?

Nag, nag, "a9-".

Go on. You know you enjoy it.

Well, it's because I love you, Joe.

I don't want to see you go to waste.

It isn't as if you didn't have a good brain.

- You always did very well at school. - Hold on a minute, Mum.

There's a bloke I want a word with over there.

What are you following me for?

Eh?

I'm just standing here, ain't I? Having a drag, ain't I?

Now, look, you've been following me for days.

What the bloody hell do you think you're on?

No, nothing, mate. It's a free country, innit?

Look, I'll tell you where I'm going.

I'm gonna put my mother on a train and I'm calling back at my place

and I should be in Nicky's cafe' in the Portobello Road at five o'clock.

I'll see you there.

You want a lot, don't ya?

What does he want?

Oh, nothing.

Seem to know some funny people.

Anyway, I still don't know why you left your job.

Don't know myself, Mum.

But you must know, Joe.

Nobody knows why they do things.

That's a silly thing to say.

I know why I do things.

I think it very peculiar if I didn't.

Anyway, I've said all I'm going to say.

I could talk till I'm blue in the face, it would make no impression.

From now on, I'll just give up.

You can ruin your life for all I care.

I'll just forget about you.

It's no good. You never listen to anything I say.

I might just as well save my breath.

And now we come to the other argument that these people use.

The naive,

sentimental argument

that they use when they are confronted by the facts!

The argument that we force these people,

these Indians, these Pakistanis,

that we force them to live in slum conditions.

Now, let us examine this argument.

We do not force, you and I.

We do not force these foreigners to come here.

We do not force them to take our houses and to undercut our jobs.

I fought a bloody war against bastards like you!

Here we have an example of the kind of hoodlum

who would prevent free speech in London.

Your kind of free speech!

People have every right to come and live in this country!

In this borough in the year 1951,

the coloured population was one-tenth

of what it was in the last quarter of last year.

A tenth!

Ten times as many coloured people

have moved into this borough.

Rubbish! Where do you get your figures from?

Now, what does this mean to you and me?

I should carry the cup separately from the saucer, dear boy.

Now it's going to drip all down your tie.

You playing some bloody game with me or what?

All life is a game, dear friend.

Never mind the bloody Oscar Wilde patter!

It's you that's had that whining, snivelling moron following me, isn't it?

Jacko?

Yes, that's a reasonable description.

He's quite harmless.

Lonely perhaps. Who isn't?

He's a stray dog.

Why has he been following me?

I want to find out what sort of man you are.

How you live.

How you spend your time.

And who you spend it with.

How would you like to work with me?

Doing what?

Making money.

Well, if you've got so much money, Why'd you need Georgia to put you up?

Why can't you afford a hotel?

Yes, I admit it, I'm skint for the moment and I'm not prepared to be skint for long.

If it suits me to live like a tramp for a bit,

I can live in a ditch and it won't affect me.

When I get the money, it must be big money.

When the money's gone, I can change again.

You've got to adapt in this world, old boy.

Adapt and compromise.

But when it suits you. Not when it suits the other people.

So you've got a racket instead of a job.

You disapprove?

It's no concern of mine.

Well, then how would you like to make £10,000?

Don't talk wet.

I have an aunt

who happens to be one of the richest women in Hampshire.

She lives miles away from anywhere.

It's a source of constant surprise to me that she's never been burgled.

Well, you have come to the wrong man.

Supposing the burglar did break in.

Supposing my aunt was startled.

She might start to scream...

and he, in a panic, might kill her.

The burglar would get away with a few bits of silver,

just to keep the books straight.

But the real crispies would start coming under the door later on

when I collected my inheritance.

This is a joke, isn't it?

Cross my heart and hope to die.

We've all got to go sooner or later.

Why me?

Well, I can hardly do it myself, dear boy, could I?

And it's not the kind of favour one can ask of a close friend.

No, I'm serious.

Has it never occurred to you that the only perfect crime

is when one stranger murders another.

A young man who spends his day shut in his room bothering nobody.

Who would suspect him of murdering a dear old lady in rural Hampshire?

I think you're off your rocker.

I say to the Home Secretary...

come down and live among the blacks yourself!

We have nothing against the blacks.

But...

we do not want to live with the blacks.

We do not want to work with the blacks.

Well, Joe, aren't you gonna rush round to the police?

They're a bit tied up at the moment.

Don't you think I'm a bit of a swine?

I told you it's no concern of mine.

Well, it makes you guilty whether you do it or not, doesn't it, Joe?

You're condoning it, that's just as bad.

You know where to come to if you want me.

Well, full marks for the hill start this morning, eh, Father?

Yes, it's quite an achievement getting into third gear with your handbrake on.

You call that parking?

Well, I dunno.

It's Joe Beckett, isn't it?

Hello, Father, how...

Joe Beckett! Well, well, this is a surprise.

How are ya? How's ya mother?

Oh, she's fine.

Father Dominic, this is Joe Beckett.

His family lives in my previous parish.

Yes, great old friends of mine.

I had a letter from your mother only last week.

She's a good woman, Joe.

A very pious woman.

I hope you appreciate her.

You haven't changed at all. How long is it now?

Three years, four years?

About four years, Father.

Where you living now?

Western Avenue, just round the corner.

Ah, so you're in our parish.

Doubtless we'll be seeing you in church.

No, I'm afraid I don't go to church anymore.

Oh, now, now, Joe.

I'm no longer a Catholic.

I see. You could be a lapsed Catholic

or an unworthy Catholic,

but you're still a Catholic.

You know, Father,

this young man I got here once intended to be a priest.

I'm sure Mr Beckett had his reasons for changing his mind.

Ah, yes.

You can't force things like that.

Vocations come from God.

They sometimes come from the most unlikely persons.

Why, I was a holy terror as a boy.

And a vocation was the furthest thing from my mind.

But, Joe,

you're in a state of mortal sin.

You must do something about it.

The sin is an of fence against myself, Father, no one else.

Sin is an of fence against God.

You're disobeying his commandments.

You must make an effort to embrace the church.

You must try.

Have you really tried, Joe?

Yes, I've tried, Father, but it doesn't work.

You're an intelligent man, Father.

I mean...

if the light goes out I know it's a fuse, it's not black magic.

Or if I'm ill,

I know it's a classified disease and not witchcraft.

It's only in religion that you expect me to suspend all reason.

Ah, a seeker after truth.

Yes, I'm afraid Joe still has too much conceit.

Humility, Mr Beckett.

Like Father Hogan when he gets behind the wheel of a car,

you lack humility.

Yes.

I suffer from the sin of pride on me three-point turns.

I'd freely admit it.

But you know, Joe,

the sin of pride is still the sin of Satan.

Why don't you forget reason for a while?

TW Prayer instead?

I want you to promise me you'll go to Mass.

Will you do that now?

Of course you will.

Otherwise you know, Joe, now the city's full of dangers.

Bad companions.

Young girls with no moral upbringing.

Young girls with no moral upbringing.

Young girls with no moral upbringing.

Young girls with no moral upbringing.

What time is it?

About three o'clock.

Damn!

Be a honey, Joe.

Joe?

Hmm?

Ah, you're lovely, Ilsa, you really are.

Joe.

Yeah, what is it, love?

I think I'm in love with somebody else.

I see.

I've been meaning to tell you all night but I couldn't.

I kept thinking but then you'd...

you'd either say something or...

something would happen and I just didn't have the guts.

But I... I wanted to tell you before we, erm,

well, you know.

Then why didn't you?

Well, I told you why I didn't.

And once we started kissing, I couldn't break off.

I didn't notice you trying to break off.

That's why I said I couldn't and then...

Oh, you know.

You're just a complete turd, aren't you?

That's not fair, Joe.

I don't feel like being fair!

I did warn you, Joe.

Joe, didn't I warn you?

Oh, yeah, you warned me.

I mean, it's not as if you're terribly satisfying.

What have you got to offer me?

Oh, for God's sake, shut up.

Have you slept with him yet?

Have you slept with him yet?!

Don't shout at me.

Well, have you? Hmm?

I said don't shout at me.

Have you or haven't you?!

I have! I have!

I have! I have!

You bloody little scrubber! You bloody little slut!

Shut up! Shut up!

Get out!

Get out of my house this minute! Get out!

You've got five minutes to get that girl out of this room, do you hear me?

- Bloody well kick her out now. - Shut up!

Live in my house, you pay no rent.

You. Five minutes.

You first thing tomorrow morning.

And all your belongings.

Cut!

Oh, shut up.

It was only once, Joe.

Honestly, it was only once.

It's Larry.

You know, he plays the banjo at the club.

I was there late one night and I was miserable.

Then of course we went for this drink.

I didn't even like him at first.

Did I get drunk.

Get out.

Don't be angry with me, Joe.

Nobody must be angry with me.

Everybody must love me.

Everybody must love me.

Come on, Stan. Can't wait all day.

No worry, is there?

What's the matter then, Grandad?

Excuse me, could I get through.

Eh? Eh? What?

If you'll excuse me, you're standing in front of my gate.

You'll have to speak up, Grandad. He's a bit deaf.

If I could disturb you just for a moment.

How much did you pay for this, Grandad?

Oh, he didn't pay for it. He knocked it off.

Didn't ya? Eh? Didn't ya?

You're a bit of an old villain, ain't ya? Eh? Eh?

Alright, that'|| do.

Oh, funny man here.

You looking for trouble then?

You heard me. Move.

And what if we don't?

Come on. You as well, scarper.

Ah, got a bright boy here. Fancies himself.

Oh, come on, leave it. The old cow knows the old lady.

You watch out. We can wait.

You alright, Mr Gash?

Oh, yes, thank you, Joe.

It was only a boyish prank.

I'm sure they didn't mean any harm though.

Come in, Joe. Join me in a cup of tea, eh?

Yes, alright. I will.

Now here's a subject for our young friends to study,

"The History of Pacifism", most interesting.

You going on your holidays, Joe?

No, I'm moving on. Just been kicked out of me room.

Oh, dear me, dear me.

And have you no place to go?

You might try Mrs Butterworth upstairs.

She's very, very reasonable.

Oh, she's have to be more than reasonable to take me on.

I'm broke.

Oh, but you're most welcome to stay here by all means.

Oh, no, no thanks. I'll find somewhere.

I tell you what though,

if I could leave my bags here until I get settled down somewhere?

Oh, but certainly, certainly.

As long as you wish, yes.

Thanks.

Here, you haven't read all these, have you?

Oh, yes.

Oh, yes, I've studied most things in my search.

Search for what?

The truth. The search for truth.

You'll be a long time finding it.

It's worthwhile. We're all looking for something.

Not me.

I'm trying to give it up.

Oh, yes, yes, you as well.

All of us in our single rooms.

We've all broken away from something.

We're all looking for something.

Ah, I suppose so.

What are you looking for, Joe?

I don't know.

I'll probably know when it turns up.

- Got your own key, haven't you? - Yeah, but it's not as simple as that.

The landlady lives on the ground floor, she's always popping out.

So what's it to her?

Look, I've told you six times already, I can't and that's that.

Why don't you get one for yourself?

I'm economising.

Well, economise on somebody else.

Here, have one of these.

Oh, thanks.

Still playing the field, I see.

Thought you were back with Ilsa?

Yes, I was.

For about five minutes.

Anyway what are you doing on the loose?

Thought you were shacked up with Dickie Dyce?

He comes and goes.

Turns up when he feels like it.

I'm turning into the head cook and bottle washer.

Why'd you stick with him?

I dunno.

He seemed very nice when I first met him.

Polite, considerate, romantic.

Opening doors, helping me on with my coat. All that jazz.

Then after he moved in, Wham.

He can be pretty nasty when he wants to.

Tell him to clear off.

It's your flat.

I don't even know where he is. I haven't seen him for two days.

Still I expect he'll turn up again at the weekend

when he wants some more money.

Come on, Joe.

Take me to the Queen's Elm. You can buy me a drink.

Do you wanna bet on that?

Alright, I'll buy you a drink.

Have you eaten today?

Errn, no, I don't think I have.

- Come on. - Where are we going?

Home. I'm gonna do my little woman act for you.

Wow. That was marvellous.

Taste better than Benzedrine.

- Shall I cook you some more? - Uh-uh.

No thanks, love. It was lovely.

I'll have another cigarette though.

Help yourself.

It's all very nice.

I'm glad you came.

I was all lined up for a lonely evening.

Yeah, so was I.

Who's that?

My old man.

That's someone else I haven't seen for years.

Still, he keeps up the payments.

That's my little girl.

She's seven now.

She lives with my mother. I see her whenever I can.

Not often enough.

What's she called?

Jeannie.

She's doing very well at school.

Teacher said she's one of the best in the class at reading.

God, I look old.

You're not old, love.

I'm young enough to want another husband.

Too old to get the kind I want.

Talk to me, Joe.

What about?

Anything.

Just talk to me.

I'm lonely.

Come on, then.

Well, how do you know? What proof have you got?

How'd you know indeed. Anyway she's two months gone, isn't she?

Get away. That's three blokes she's blaming to my certain knowledge.

Well, she can't blame me. I haven't been near it for months.

You don't remember me, do you?

No, Why?

You going to buy me a sandwich?

Some hopes.

You were at that rave at Mickey Lewis's last week.

Don't you remember? You spent about three hours trying to get me into the bedroom.

Did I manage?

No, you didn't.

Oh, Well.

In that case.

Let's have a dance then.

- Where'd you live then? - Oh, all around the place.

Paddington at the time of writing.

Oh, yeah. By yourself?

Unless I leave with a date.

What about your landlady then? Does she mind you taking people up?

She's drunk half the time.

I had five people there for a whole week once.

She never knew.

How'd you get home then? You walk or what?

If I have to.

Went home in a Mercedes once.

- Goodnight. - Goodnight, love.

Who'd you think he's waving at?

Hmm?

Hold on minute. Don't go away.

I've taken hours to find you.

They sent me over from the cafe'.

What's wrong, what's up?

Could we go somewhere, son?

Your landlady came over.

Your uncle was on the telephone.

Is it my mother?

She's dead.

Apparently, she passed away at 3:15 this afternoon.

Oh, wow.

Bloody marvellous that, isn't it?

Come, Joe. I'll take you home.

I haven't got a bloody home.

Come on, son.

Come on, now.

There, that's it, that's it.

You're going up for the funeral, Joe.

No.

I believe it's usual.

Yes, I know.

Oh, now here's a fine book.

"Practical Aids to Contemplation".

A lot of interesting things in it.

Hey, this one here.

I was given this a long while a go for Christmas.

It's all about noble lives.

There's a chapter here about a man who led a very simple life.

He ran a leper colony.

Did you know that a leper can't feel hot water?

If you immersed his hand in hot water he wouldn't know about it.

He'd have to be told. He wouldn't feel anything.

I read about that.

I'm an emotional leper.

I don't feel anything.

I try to but I can't. I've got no sense of touch.

It's not only my mother, it's everything.

Work, women, everything.

What you gonna do about that problem, Joe?

What would you say, Mr Gash,

if I said I was going to do something criminal?

But, Joe, you're not a criminal.

You don't belong in their world.

I don't belong anywhere.

That's the point.

I could make a choice. I wouldn't just be drifting.

Look, suppose a man

has grown up with certain beliefs and values

and then he loses them. They just slip away.

Well, there's no meaning in life, there's no point.

Do you see what I mean?

Unless he finds he can put his own meaning in life.

If he wants to live for pleasure, he can do.

If he wants to commit a crime, he can do.

You know, when I was your age,

I had everything I could desire.

A good job, good prospects,

a wife who loved me, everything.

I was contented.

And then quite suddenly,

my whole way of life lost its appeal.

It just went.

Rather like losing the taste for food when one's got a cold.

And so I gave it up.

I walked out one morning.

Never came back from that day to this.

Where did you go?

Why, here of course.

This room.

It was the first thing I had to do.

To sit by myself

and find the truth.

How long have you been here?

Since before you were born, Joe.

It's here somewhere, Joe.

You can help me find it, can't you, Joe? Can't you?

You've nobody now, have you? You've nowhere to go.

You've got nothing.

Why you're like me, Joe.

You've cast off everything, worldly possessions.

You've got nothing, nothing!

I'm going out.

No, no!

You've nowhere to go!

Come on, Joe.

Well, what'd you think of her?

How do you like it?

The car?

- Is it new? - Almost.

Ah, got it cheap.

- Where are we going? - The fresh air and culture.

This room was designed by Adam, not the Garden of Eden one.

But the 18th-century architect Robert Adam.

Now I want you to note the apsidal ends of the columns,

which were a feature of Adam's work...

Look at them, poor bastards.

They come from their miserable suburbs to glimpse

at the style and comfort they'll never have and don't deserve.

Alright, Joe?

You realise you've got to put yourself in my hands completely.

You agree to that?

Do YOU agree?

Yes.

You've gone to pieces. Are you on Benzedrine?

I can do it. Don't you worry about me.

I'll be the judge of that.

I'm gonna give you enough money

to keep you clothed and fed for the next few days.

I can take care of myself.

Take care of yourself?

Look at yourself, man.

You're a complete wreck. Look at your shoes.

Where's your self-respect.

Self-respect?

Thought we were talking about a murder.

Not a murder, dear boy. The murder.

An old lady in the middle of nowhere

is going to be killed by a man she's never seen or heard of.

Murder complete and perfect.

When does it happen?

Next Saturday.

Now you've got to memorise all the details

because we're not going to communicate with each other again ever.

What about the money?

Don't move.

Have you ever seen anyone with a bullet in their guts?

No.

Would you like one in yours?

Of course not.

Reach over and take it, Joe.

I won't stop you.

Reach over.

It isn't loaded.

Isn't it?

You don't know that, do you?

I say it isn't but I might be lying.

Why don't you take it?

Keep it out of sight, man.

This is the orangery...

Now you know what fear is.

- Does it have to be with this? - Yes.

How'd you know I can use it?

Every Saturday morning there's a train leaves Waterloo

at 4:36 for Salisbury.

- I thought she lived in Hampshire? - You play chess, don't you, Joe?

I suggest you consider this as a game of chess with every move planned.

Naturally, you won't be catching the Green Line bus

and getting off at my aunt's house.

Alright, go on.

My aunt lives alone except for a housekeeper.

Every Saturday morning,

the housekeeper catches the eight o'clock bus to do the shopping.

You're going on a roundabout route

that'|| get you to the house about 8:30.

Do you like football?

- Football? - Yes.

Because by the time the housekeeper gives the alarm

you'll, and several thousand morons,

will be watching the Spurs playing the local team in the cup tie.

You will come back to London on the supporters' train.

How will I get into the house?

We'll begin at the beginning.

The train that leaves Waterloo at 4:36 in the morning

will connect you to the workmen's bus at 6:15.

That will connect you with another bus.

You will have a long tramp across country.

You've got the movement order there, old boy,

which you'll follow rigorously and to the letter.

It's like war, old boy. It's an adventure.

Joe?

Hold on a minute, darling.

Where have you been hiding?

Around.

Got a new job?

Not exactly.

Aren't you pleased to see me?

Lover boy's getting impatient, hadn't you better go?

He can wait.

Joe, what are you doing now?

You're not doing anything with that man Dyce, are you?

Why do you say that?

You two were always so cosy together.

Don't be bloody silly.

I'm taking a job in a club.

Are you?

Yes, the owner he's a friend of Larry's.

He says I've got the looks and the right sort of personality.

It's just the rotten sort of job you would take.

Teasing a lot of tired old businessmen.

Fat lot you care, anyway.

Still the cheapest food in town and not bad.

You've missed a bit.

Oh. Looks sad.

Where's Joe then?

Why? What do you want him for?

I don't want him. I want his chess set, don't I?

Why don't you buy one?

What with?

I thought the money was good in your line?

Haven't you squealed on anybody lately?

Oh, sharpish.

Haven't got Joe to shout at now, have ya?

He's not doing too well, is he?

He's got a new suit on his back.

He's clean and he's had a shave.

That's more than I can say for some people.

Oh. Tell him I was asking.

Come on, let's go.

Ilsa, darling.

You couldn't introduce me to a rich daddy who's a TV producer, could you?

I've decided to become a teenage idol.

I'll do my best.

She's so much better when she's with Joe. He makes her so gay.

Yeah, gayer.

It's funny he's in the money now, too.

Now where would Joe get money?

Shall we go to the pictures?

Darling, could you take me to Colville Terrace?

I think I left something in Joe's room.

Oh, have a heart, that's miles out of our way.

Why? Where are we going?

Colville Terrace, I suppose.

Oh.

It's you. What do you want?

I wondered if you knew where Joe was?

He left here owing me three weeks' rent.

If I had his address I should tell the police, not you.

Don't you have any idea...

You'd better go back to your noisy friend

and stop wasting my time.

I'm just going down here a moment. I won't be long, wait for me.

What're you playing at?

I'm not waiting round here all night.

I'm not your bloody chauffeur!

Yes?

Mr Gash?

Joe told me about you. I'm a friend of his.

Do you know where he's living now?

No, I haven't seen him for two days.

I saw him this evening.

He seemed to be in the money. Did you, did you lend him any?

Me? Oh, good heavens, no. No.

You don't think he's doing anything wrong, do you?

Oh, then I think you'd better find him.

If I see him, I'll tell him you called and were looking for him.

Thank you, Mr Gash.

And about time, too.

I'm not gonna trail about after your old boyfriends. Get in.

Joe's not an old boyfriend.

He happens to mean something to me.

Well, if he means so much to you when you find him he can drive you home

cos if you don't get in this car now, I'm going.

Go then.

I can assure you it's no loss to me.

Right.

Come on, mate, you'll miss the bus.

I hear you was in the Wheatsheaf last night then, Albert.

Oh, you've been having me followed then, have ya?

I knew where you were, we heard all about it.

We know who you were with as well.

- With his lady friend, was he? - He knows.

We know as well!

Lovely day, sir. All the way?

Er, Hinton please.

- That'|| be one and... - Five pence.

One and five.

Nice day for it.

Yeah.

Marvellous.

What are you doing here?

Nothing, I...

What do you mean, "Nothing?" Who are you?

Look, I'm just going.

Going?

Well, I'm going to call the police.

Please, Miss Dyce, don't call the police. There's...

- There's no reason. - How do you know my name?

Are you one of Dickie's friends? Did he send you?

Look, Miss Dyce, I swear I haven't taken anything.

- Just, just let me go. - Let you go?

Prison's the place for your kind and that goes for Dickie too.

Rather stopped at home than seen that lot.

Hey, look here, Leyton Orient two-nil down at half time.

I had them for an away win.

43 killed in an air crash. Look at this.

Wouldn't get me up in an aeroplane.

Talking of the dead. What's Chelsea doing?

No score.

- Ipswich? - Er, they're losing. One down.

- What? - "Chess riddle in death fall".

Bloody broad daylight they're doing them in now.

Anyone I suppose that's someone with no more worries.

Did you say Ipswich are losing at home?

- One down. - Hell fire.

Oh, we'll find something in the fridge.

- Alright, alright. - Come on in, children.

- Oh, well, be like that. - Yes.

Hello, Joe.

Surprised to see me, ain't ya?

What do you want?

You been on a train then?

No. Been trying to make a phone call.

Er, you see the captain's aunty's had it.

- Come and have a cup of tea. - Don't want a cup of tea, I'm going.

Where're you going, Joe? They'll get ya.

Course they will.

Hear you bought yourself new clothes, new rig out.

Where would you get the money?

You come home with the crowds, didn't ya?

Yeah, they always do.

What are you going to do about it?

Sticky Dyce.

Obvious, innit?

Aunty's dead.

Chess set.

Football train.

See I might look stupid, Joe, but I'm not.

You're going to shop me, aren't you?

Well, it's my living, innit?

- Didn't mean her to die. - Sure.

But they'll get you anyway.

Chess set.

Dickity Dyce.

And I'm a citizen.

I mean, you shopped yourself, Joe.

I might as well have the money, eh?

Yeah, yeah.

You might as well.

What else have I got?

You know what they say.

Unlucky in love.

But not like you, Joe. It's a long time since I've had a woman.

There's no Ilsa's for me.

But I've got it up there, you see?

Go to bed with her, don't you?

Eh?

You sleep with her, don't you.

Go away.

I'll just go down to the station then and I'll just say my little piece, eh, Joe?

"Well, sir," I said, "You may have been commanding officer in your own camp

but when you're in my lines you do what I damn well tell you."

Do you know what he said?

He said, "If you hadn't said that, Dyce,

I'd have put you under close arrest."

Yes?

It's for me.

What'd you mean?

Well, it worked, didn't it?

Yes, but it was an accident.

They're after me now and I'm not running away.

Still, you're not involved yet.

No, I suppose not.

Well, take care of yourself, duckie.

Where you going to now?

Oh. God bless you.

The funny thing is, not a year later, he had to face a court-martial himself.

Paralytic drunk. Incapable on the Queen's Birthday Parade.

He used to drink surgical spirit, poor devil.

My, God, it's not that time, is it?

Well, you're not going out tonight, are you, Dickie?

As a matter of fact, love...

I'll get it.

I didn't ask anybody else.

Mr Richard Dyce?

Actually, no, he's on the top floor, I believe.

- I dunno whether you'll find him there. - Just a moment, sir.

Well, if you insist.

Joe!

I've been looking for you everywhere.

I've been away.

Oh, it's got to be you, Joe.

Don't leave me this time.

What are the police doing at old Gash's house?

I think it's for me.

What do you mean?

Have... haven't you read the newspapers?

Dyce's aunt.

Not you, Joe. You couldn't.

- If anyone will believe it. - I'll believe it, Joe.

You're not going?

Yeah.

I'll be back. I want to.

Don't come any further, love.

I'll see you in the café.

Yeah.

In the cafe'.