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[ CLICKING ]

[ HORN HONKS ]

[ CART CLATTERING ]

[ BREATHING HEAVILY ]

[ DOORBELL BUZZES ]

>> ASSHOLE.

>> FUCKER.

>> HI.

>> HI.

>> COME ON!

[ GRUNTS ]

OH!

BRIDGET.

>> WHAT?

>> LOOK WHAT I FOUND.

>> LET'S SEE.

>> COME AND GET YOUR 40,

BRIDGET.

COME ON, BRIDGET.

>> [ SIGHS ]

>> WELCOME HOME.

>> MM.

[ BOTTLES CLINK ]

>> COMPLETELY.

[ SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE ]

>> THAT'S WHERE I SET UP MY

ACCOUNT.

YOU CAN SET ONE UP THERE.

>> OKAY.

>> AND THEN THERE'S A REALLY

CUTE GROCERY STORE DOWN THERE,

SO THAT'S WHERE I SHOP.

WHAT'S WRONG?

>> NOTHING.

>> WHAT?

>> NOTHING. I SWEAR.

[ CHUCKLES ]

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> IT JUST DOESN'T LOOK LIKE THE

NEW YORK THAT YOU SEE IN MOVIES,

YOU KNOW?

>> COME ON!

IT'S TOTALLY CHARMING.

>> OKAY.

>> HUH.

UM...

HEY.

HOW ABOUT WE GO OVER THERE?

>> PERFECT.

BETWEEN TWO OF THEM.

THAT'S PERFECT.

>> OKAY, THIS ONE -- WHO WOULD

YOU RATHER FUCK --

ARETHA FRANKLIN OR WYNONNA JUDD?

>> JUDD.

WYNONNA JUDD OR KIRSTIE ALLEY?

>> UGH.

ALLEY.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> UH...

OPRAH OR GAYLE?

>> OPRAH.

>> BRIDGET.

>> * SHE'S A CHAMPION

* ANGELS IN BARS

>> OPRAH.

>> DAMN.

10.

>> DEFINITELY A 10.

>> THAT GIRL? SHE'S A 4.

>> YOU'RE CRAZY.

>> BRIDGET'S A 10.

>> DIDN'T YOU SAY YOU HAD WORK

OR SOMETHING?

>> OH! I GOT TO GET READY.

>> ALL RIGHT, THIS IS ONE OF THE

ONES FROM LAST THURSDAY.

>> I'M GOOD WITH LAST THURSDAY.

[ LAUGHS ]

>> THIS GIRL'S LIKE A RETARD,

BRIDGE.

>> WHERE DO YOU MEET THESE

GIRLS?

>> ANOTHER RESTAURANT ON

BLEECKER.

>> THAT WIPES OUT THE ENTIRE

VILLAGE FOR YOU.

>> I KNOW. I REALLY KNOW.

>> THAT'S REALLY GOOD.

>> STUPIDEST GIRL I'VE EVER MET.

>> SHE IS SO CLINGY AND BORING.

>> AND DUMB.

>> [ GASPS ] OOH. 9.

>> SHE'S A 4.

>> OH, MY GOD.

[ LAUGHTER ]

SHE'S NOT.

>> UGH.

>> BYE, GUYS. SEE YOU.

>> OH, AMY, BEFORE YOU LEAVE,

WHO WOULD YOU RATHER FUCK --

YOUR MOM OR YOUR DAD?

>> OH, MY DAD.

>> GOD.

>> OKAY, HOW ABOUT YOU WAIT FOR

ME OUTSIDE ON THAT ONE?

>> OKAY.

>> OKAY.

OKAY.

>> BYE, AMY.

>> OH, CUTE. BYE.

BOO.

>> MM.

>> MM, YEAH.

>> THANK YOU.

>> I GOT YOUR BACK.

>> YOU ALWAYS DO.

>> BUT NEVER HAVE I EVER DRANK

THAT MUCH RUM.

[ GLASSES CLINK ]

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> MM.

ALL RIGHT, WISH ME LUCK.

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

[ MUSIC PLAYING IN DISTANCE ]

>> HEY.

DOES THIS PLACE NOT REMIND YOU

OF JOE'S?

>> ON TEMPLE STREET.

>> YEAH, IN DOWNTOWN WESTPORT.

IT'S GREAT.

>> I TOLD YOU.

>> ARE YOU GONNA HAVE ANOTHER

ONE?

>> MM-HMM. AREN'T YOU?

>> DO YOU REMEMBER THE TIME

WHEN WE WERE THERE FOR SARA'S

BIRTHDAY?

>> This girl keeps looking at

me.

>> OH, IT'S WHEN WE STOPPED...

>> I TOTALLY KNOW HIM.

>> I LIKE YOUR SHIRT.

CAN I HAVE ANOTHER ONE?

>> She's still looking.

>> SORRY.

AREN'T YOU THE ONLY GUY IN

MY...

>> GIRL-WRITER BOOK CLASS.

>> ...FEMALE AUTHORS OF THE 19th

CENTURY?

>> I AM LITERALLY THE ONLY GUY

IN THAT CLASS.

>> WHY ARE YOU IN THAT CLASS?

>> BRIDGET MADE ME.

>> IS THAT YOUR MAJOR?

NO. STATISTICS.

>> OH.

>> YOU?

>> I FINISHED LAST FALL.

>> HE'S STUDYING FOR THE LSATs.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> That's like a lawyer, right?

>> THAT'S -- THAT'S AMAZING.

>> SHE'S A BALLERINA.

>> MODERN-DANCE MAJOR, UPTOWN.

>> DON'T YOU JUST HATE HER?

>> HER? NO.

>> GOD, NO.

SORRY -- UM, ANDERSON, OUR

PROFESSOR.

>> OH, YEAH.

SHE'S A BIG OLD DOUCHE BAG.

>> [ LAUGHS ]

>> WHERE YOU GUYS FROM?

>> NEW JERSEY.

>> YOU A GIANTS FAN?

>> HELLS, YEAH.

>> OH, MY DAD'S COMPANY HAS BOX

SEATS.

>> NO SHIT.

>> IT'S A DOUCHE NOZZLE.

>> WHAT?

>> NOT A DOUCHE BAG.

IT'S A DOUCHE NOZZLE.

IT'S JUST WAY MORE ACCURATE.

>> YOU'RE SO SMART.

>> I KNOW.

>> OFFENSIVE!

GIRLS ARE SO OFFENSIVE!

>> THURSDAY GONE?

>> YEAH.

>> MNH.

>> HEY, DO YOU GUYS WANT TO COME

SIT DOWN?

>> SURE.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> AREN'T YOU IN --

>> GIRL-WRITER BOOK CLASS.

>> FEMALE AUTHORS OF THE 19th

CENTURY.

>> OKAY, UM, NEVER HAVE I

EVER...WIPED MY ASS WITH LEAVES.

>> THAT'S DISGUSTING.

>> YOU LICK ASS.

>> [ LAUGHS ] I DO.

YEAH. YOU'RE UP, SUNSHINE.

>> OH, I, UH...

>> OH, IT'S "NEVER HAVE I EVER."

IF YOU'VE DONE IT, YOU DRINK.

IF YOU HAVEN'T, YOU WAIT.

>> OH.

UM...NEVER HAVE I EVER, UH...

LOCKED MYSELF OUT.

>> NAKED?

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> OH, MY GOD.

>> UM, NEVER HAVE I EVER...

KISSED A GIRL.

>> OH, THAT'S TOO BAD.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> IT WAS A DARE.

>> THAT'S, LIKE, HOT.

>> YOU JEALOUS?

>> ALWAYS.

>> ALL RIGHT, I GOT TO PEE.

>> ALL RIGHT, UH, NEVER --

>> NEVER HAVE I EVER BEEN TO THE

FOUR-FACED LIAR.

>> SO YOU'RE...NOT GOOD AT THIS.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> WHY IS IT CALLED THAT?

>> OH, UH, IT'S NAMED AFTER A

CLOCK TOWER IN A TOWN IN...

>> IRELAND.

>> IRELAND. THANK YOU.

UM, I FORGET THE NAME OF THE

TOWN.

>> BRIDGET, IT DOESN'T MATTER.

>> IT REALLY DOESN'T MATTER.

UM, BUT EACH FACE OF THE CLOCK

TELLS A DIFFERENT TIME,

BUT NONE OF THEM ARE RIGHT.

THEY ALL LIE, SO THEY CALL IT

THE FOUR-FACED LIAR.

I'M BRIDGET, BY THE WAY.

>> MOLLY.

>> GREG.

>> TRIP.

>> HUH?

>> TERRENCE WITHERSPOON McNALLY

III.

III -- TRIPLE -- TRIP.

>> [ LAUGHS ]

>> I'M TRIP.

>> WHY WOULD ANYONE NAME YOU

THAT?

[ LAUGHTER ]

[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ]

[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING IN

DISTANCE ]

[ TRAIN RUMBLING ]

[ CAR ALARM BLARING ]

[ CHUCKLES ]

[ SHOUTING CONTINUES ]

>> [ CHUCKLES ] IT'S SO LOUD.

>> YOU'LL GET USED TO IT.

>> THIS IS THE CRAZIEST THING

I'VE EVER DONE.

I CAN'T BELIEVE I LIVE HERE.

>> I LOVE IT HERE.

>> I KNOW YOU DO.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> I ASKED TRIP TO THE GAME ON

THURSDAY.

>> GOOD. THEY WERE FUN.

>> HE WAS FUN.

SHE WAS...ALL OVER THE PLACE.

>> WELL, THAT'S THE VILLAGE FOR

YOU.

>> UH-HUH.

[ CHUCKLES ]

WHAT?

>> NOTHING.

>> WHAT? WHAT?

>> [ Laughing ] OH, GOD!

STOP IT!

>> WHAT?

>> PLEASE, STOP, PLEASE.

[ BOTH LAUGH ]

>> WHAT?

>> THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

>> WHAT FOR?

>> FOR FOLLOWING ME HERE.

>> ANYWHERE.

>> MMM.

[ ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYING ]

>> HEY, BABE, YOU WANT TO COME

TO A PLAY WITH ME TOMORROW

NIGHT?

>> I CAN'T. I HAVE A DATE.

>> WHAT?

>> JEALOUS?

>> [ CHUCKLES ] YOU'RE NUTS.

[ GUITAR STOPS ]

[ HORNS HONKING IN DISTANCE ]

>> BABY. BABY, LOOK AT ME.

>> HMM? NO.

SHUT UP.

>> LOOK AT ME.

YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL.

>> WHAT?

>> UM...WHAT DO YOU WANT THE

WHOLE WORLD TO KNOW TODAY?

>> I LOVE YOU.

>> WAIT. STOP.

>> [ SIGHS ]

>> LOOK AT ME.

WHAT DO YOU WANT THE WORLD TO

KNOW TODAY?

>> TRIP, I LOVE YOU.

>> SAY IT ONE MORE TIME.

>> I LOVE YOU.

>> YEAH?

>> YES.

[ SMOOCHING ]

MMM.

UM, WHO YOU GOING ON A DATE WITH

TOMORROW?

>> GREG.

>> OKAY.

[ DOOR OPENS ]

[ WATER RUNNING ]

>> BYE.

>> [ GROANS ]

[ DOOR CLOSES ]

>> BYE.

>> NICE.

>> THANK YOU.

NEVER HAVE I EVER...

EATEN WORMS.

>> THAT'S STUPID.

>> WELL...

>> NEVER HAVE I EVER...

FALLEN OUT OF A WINDOW.

>> WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH

YOU?

>> WORMS?

>> POINT TAKEN.

DUDE, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO FOR

ANDERSON'S PROJECT?

>> WHY DON'T YOU DO SOMETHING

WITHOUT ME FOR A CHANGE, OKAY?

>> THAT FIERY LITTLE REDHEAD

THIRD ROW BACK ASKED YOU, DIDN'T

SHE?

>> SURE DID.

>> ASS.

>> NEVER HAVE I EVER BEEN CAUGHT

CHEATING.

>> NEVER HAVE I EVER LOST TO YOU

AT THIS GAME.

>> HEY.

>> OH.

[ GAME PIECE SLAMS ]

>> [ LAUGHS ]

>> WHAT'S UP, DUDE?

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> SORRY, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT YOU

WERE COMING.

>> UH, WHERE'S YOUR GIRLFRIEND?

>> I HAVE NO IDEA.

>> IT'S BOYS' NIGHT.

>> WHAT?

>> PULL UP A STOOL.

>> UH, YOU CAN TAKE MINE,

ACTUALLY.

I'M GONNA GO SMOKE.

>> STUDY BREAK?

>> YEAH. TWO HOURS.

>> COOL.

DUDE, THOSE SEATS WERE SO GOOD

LAST NIGHT.

>> RIGHT?

>> BUT I HAD THE SHITS ALL DAY

FROM THAT HOT DOG.

>> THAT'S FOUL.

>> YOU HAVE NO IDEA.

[ GAME PIECES CLATTER ]

SPEED FOUR?

>> ABSOLUTELY.

>> YOU'RE GOING DOWN.

SORRY.

>> OKAY, I'M GONNA GO OUT WITH

HER, I GUESS.

>> HEY.

>> MOLLY.

>> I KNOW.

>> OH.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

MMM [INHALES] TUESDAY.

>> SO, YOU CALL THEM DAYS OF THE

WEEK?

>> NO.

WELL, YES, BUT TRIP STARTED

THAT.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

WAIT -- BUT THERE ARE THAT MANY?

>> NO.

SOMETIMES.

>> YOU'VE NEVER JUST DATED, PER

SE?

>> I WOULDN'T NECESSARILY CALL

IT DATING.

>> OH.

WHAT WOULD YOU CALL IT?

>> FUCKING.

>> OH.

>> HI.

>> HI.

>> Pff.

>> WEDNESDAY?

>> MAYBE.

[ LAUGHS ]

HMM?

>> OH, I DON'T -- I DON'T SMOKE.

>> SHOCKING.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

[ SMOOCHES ] HI.

>> HI.

>> PLEASE DON'T DO THAT.

>> WHAT?

>> NEVER MIND.

I DON'T KNOW WHY IT DROVE ME SO

CRAZY, BUT I-I ALMOST SAID TO

HIM, "LET ME LEAVE MY KEYS

SITTING ON THE MANTEL.

LET ME SCREW UP.

WHAT'S THE WORST THAT'S GONNA

HAPPEN?"

>> YOU'LL BE LOCKED OUT.

>> RIGHT, AND PEOPLE DO THAT ALL

THE TIME.

THEY GET BACK IN. THEY DO.

THEY MUST.

>> OR THEY DON'T.

>> UNHELPFUL.

>> SORRY.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> OH, THAT'S TOTALLY MY THING.

>> WHAT THING?

>> EVERYONE HAS A THING THAT

MAKES THEM ATTRACTED TO SOMEONE

ELSE.

LIKE, YOU STRAIGHT GIRLS ARE

INTO HOLDING DOORS AND A HAND ON

THE SMALL OF YOUR BACK.

>> TOTALLY.

[ CHUCKLES ]

>> YEAH.

THAT LIP THING -- THAT'S MY

THING.

WHAT'S THAT LOOK?

>> NOTHING.

>> [ Chuckling ] OKAY.

[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ]

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

>> OKAY.

>> HERE WE GO. HERE WE GO.

I'M READY.

>> OKAY.

[ GLASSES CLINK ]

>> OH, MY GOD.

>> CAREFUL!

>> NEVER HAVE I EVER FALLEN ON

MY FACE AND BROKEN MY NOSE

TWICE.

>> WELL, NEVER -- NEVER HAVE I

EVER PULLED OVER ON THE PARKWAY

AND SHAT IN A BAG.

>> PROM NIGHT!

>> NO, NO, NEVER HAVE I EVER

PEED IN THE HALLWAY OF OUR

APARTMENT BUILDING.

>> I DIDN'T POOP.

>> BUT YOU PEED!

>> I DIDN'T POOP.

>> [ LAUGHS ]

>> NEVER I EVER STRIPPED IN THE

HALLOWEEN-DAY PARADE.

>> JUST THE ONCE.

>> IT'S UNFATHOMABLE.

>> DUDE, YOUR LITTLE BOYFRIEND'S

HERE.

>> WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH

YOU?

>> GREG TOTALLY WANTS TRIP'S

SWEET ASS.

>> IT IS A SWEET ASS.

>> THANKS, BABE.

>> WHY DO YOU THINK EVERYONE'S

GAY?

>> I DON'T THINK EVERYONE'S GAY.

>> MM-HMM.

>> I DON'T THINK CHLOE'S GAY.

>> I HAVE TOTALLY KISSED A GIRL.

>> SWEETHEART, IF I THOUGHT YOU

WERE, LIKE, A SECOND GAY, I'D BE

ALL UP IN IT.

>> WELL, NOW IS YOUR CHANCE,

BRIDGE.

WANT TO DO ME IN THE BATHROOM?

>> YES.

>> STOP HITTING ON MY

GIRLFRIEND.

>> OH, I'M SORRY.

WERE YOU ABOUT TO DO THAT?

DIDN'T THINK SO.

>> ASSHOLE.

>> FUCKER.

>> HEY! CUTE SKIRT.

>> I'M A 4.

>> WOW. SHOTS.

>> DO YOU REALLY NEED THAT,

GREG?

>> HELLS, YES.

>> Both: HI.

[ CHUCKLE ]

>> HI.

>> WHAT ARE YOU?

>> I'M A PUMPKIN.

>> OF COURSE.

[ CHUCKLES ]

>> WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO?

>> NOT A WHOLE NOT.

YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN STAYING AT

HOME, BITING MY BOTTOM LIP.

YOU KNOW.

>> WOW. YOU'RE AN ASS.

>> * SHAKE IT, A-SHAKE IT,

SHAKE IT, A-SHAKE IT, A-WHOO *

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> * SHAKE IT OFF, BABY

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> * SHAKE IT, A-SHAKE IT,

A-SHAKE, SHAKE IT, A-SHAKE IT,

A-WHOO *

* SHAKE IT OFF, BABY

>> I KNOW. THAT'S PRETTY COOL.

>> * SHAKE IT, A-SHAKE IT,

SHAKE IT, A-SHAKE IT, A-WHOO *

>> HEY.

>> HI.

>> OH, UH, I'M ACTUALLY A GUY

UNDER HERE.

>> OKAY.

>> SOME PEOPLE THINK I'M PRETTY

CUTE, TOO.

>> [ Chuckling ] I'M SURE.

>> CAN I GET YOU SOMETHING?

>> LIKE A DATE?

>> OH, I WAS THINKING MORE A

DRINK, BUT, UH...

>> OH, OH, OKAY, SURE.

>> TRIP.

>> CAN YOU HOLD THAT THOUGHT?

>> OH, MY GOD. JUST SHUT UP.

>> I WON'T SAY ANYTHING.

CHLOE, I WON'T EVEN TALK ABOUT

THAT GUY THAT YOU BLATANTLY

FLIRTED WITH IN THE

MOVIE-THEATER LINE THE OTHER

NIGHT.

BRIDGET, HE WAS SO CUTE.

>> LET IT GO!

>> I'M LETTING IT GO, CHLOE.

IT'S GONE.

>> I COULD THROW YOU RIGHT NOW!

>> OOH, LIKE SEXUALLY?

>> REALLY MATURE, TRIP.

>> MATURE. CATAW!

>> JUST SHUT UP!

>> I'M DONE.

[ GUNFIRE, INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]

>> CHLOE SEEMED PISSED.

>> SHE'S OKAY.

>> OKAY.

>> SHIT.

>> YOU GONNA MARRY HER?

>> NO.

I DON'T KNOW.

PROBABLY.

>> EVERYBODY, GET DOWN!

>> MOTHERFUCKER.

>> YEAH, ME TOO.

I MEAN, MOLLY.

>> GREAT.

>> SHE'S PERFECT.

>> SHUT UP.

>> HOW DO YOU HANDLE THIS?

>> WE DON'T REALLY HAVE THIS

PROBLEM.

>> OH, YOU MEAN YOUR BOYFRIEND

DOESN'T FLIRT WITH OTHER GIRLS

RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU?

>> HE DOESN'T.

HE DOESN'T FLIRT WITH ANYONE,

REALLY.

>> SHOCKER.

>> JUST APOLOGIZE.

>> WHAT FOR?

>> YOU FLIRTED.

>> I DON'T FLIRT.

>> OH.

>> GIRLS FIND ME.

>> MAKES SENSE.

>> I MEAN, EVEN IF HE'D JUST

APOLOGIZE.

>> EXACTLY.

>> WHAT FOR?

>> HE SHOULD APOLOGIZE FOR BEING

AN ASS.

>> FOR FLIRTING WITH ANOTHER

GIRL RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER.

>> WE DON'T FLIRT.

GIRLS JUST FIND US.

>> MAKES SENSE.

>> YOU THINK SHE'D AT LEAST BE

ON OUR SIDE.

I MEAN, YOU HAVE TO BE MORE

SENSITIVE THAN THE AVERAGE GUY.

>> BUT I'M NOT.

>> OF COURSE YOU ARE.

>> YOU CAN TELL BY THE WAY YOU

LISTEN.

>> EXACTLY. HE DOESN'T LISTEN.

>> OF COURSE HE LISTENS.

>> [ SCOFFS ] OKAY.

HEY, TRIP, WHAT'S DECEMBER 7th?

>> UH, PEARL HARBOR DAY.

>> YEAH. AND OUR ANNIVERSARY?

I WANT TO GO TO THE BALLET.

>> OKAY. BALLET. ANNIVERSARY.

LOVE YOU.

>> SEE?

>> OKAY, OKAY.

I DON'T REALLY KNOW IF THAT

PROVES THAT I'M MORE SENSITIVE

THAN ALL GUYS.

>> STOP SAYING THAT.

YOU LISTEN WITH YOUR WHOLE BODY,

AND YOU HAVE THIS INTENSE EYE

CONTACT.

NO GUY, NOT EVEN THE BEST GUYS,

HAVE THAT.

>> BUT I DON'T REALLY FEEL LIKE

THAT'S A GENDER THING.

I FEEL LIKE THAT'S A PERSONAL

THING.

>> YOU'RE SO WRONG.

OKAY, UM, LOOK AT MODERN

LITERATURE.

ALL OF THE GREATEST FEMALE

CHARACTERS WERE WRITTEN BY WOMEN

BECAUSE NO MAN COULD EVER WRITE

FROM A FEMALE'S PERSPECTIVE.

WOMEN HAVE THIS COMPASSIONATE

CHEMISTRY THAT ALLOWS THEM TO

LISTEN WITH AN UNBIASED EAR --

ALL WOMEN, EVEN YOU.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> WE SHOULD DO ANDERSON'S

PROJECT TOGETHER.

>> OKAY.

>> SO GLAD I'M A DANCE MAJOR.

[ LAUGHTER ]

[ CHILDREN SHOUTING PLAYFULLY ]

>> I TOTALLY WANT KIDS SOME DAY.

>> OKAY.

>> OH, DID YOU GET THAT QUOTE ON

PAGE 126?

>> UM, NO, I DON'T THINK I DID,

ACTUALLY.

>> HERE.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

>> UM, YOU MIGHT NEED A

BOOKMARK.

>> SO CUTE.

>> WHAT?

>> WHAT?

>> YOU'RE FLIRTING WITH ME.

>> NO, I'M...

>> OH.

>> WOW, I'M...

>> IT'S FINE.

>> YOU'RE MY ONLY GIRLFRIEND IN

THE CITY, SO I JUST...

>> YOU SHOULD BE CAREFUL HOW YOU

USE THAT WORD.

>> [ CHUCKLES ] SORRY.

>> DON'T BE.

>> Okay.

>> [ SNIFFLES ]

[ INSECTS CHIRPING ]

>> [ SMOOCHES ]

>> GREG...NOT NOW.

>> I DON'T GET IT.

>> DUDE, THERE IS NOTHING TO

GET.

>> I JUST DON'T THINK THE WHOLE

GAY THING IS NATURAL.

>> DUDE, YOU NEVER SCREWED

SOMEONE IN THE BUTT?

>> A GUY?

>> NO, DUDE, A GIRL.

IN THE GIRL BUTT.

>> OH.

NO, MOLLY WOULD NEVER --

SHE'S NOT LIKE THAT.

>> OH.

CHLOE IS.

[ ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYING ]

>> MOLLY'S BEEN...WEIRD...

[ GUITAR STOPS ]

...LATELY.

I MEAN JUST LATELY.

>> DUDE, THEY'RE ALL WEIRD.

>> NO, NOT MOLLY.

I MEAN, WE REALLY CONNECT ON

EVERYTHING.

IT'S JUST -- I DON'T KNOW --

EVER SINCE I MOVED HERE, WE JUST

HAVE LESS AND LESS TO TALK

ABOUT.

>> THAT'S A BAD THING?

>> YEAH. FUCK YEAH.

WE TALK ABOUT EVERYTHING.

LIKE, WE'VE ALREADY PLANNED OUR

HONEYMOON.

>> UGH.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> DUDE, CHLOE'S ALWAYS TALKING

ABOUT HER FEELINGS AND HER

EMOTIONS AND HER PERIOD AND

SHIT, AND WHAT THE HELL AM I

SUPPOSED TO DO WITH ALL THAT?

>> I DON'T KNOW.

I JUST CAN'T READ HER ANYMORE.

>> DUDE, STOP TRYING.

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATION ]

[ CONVERSATION CONTINUES ]

>> SHE'S SO DESPERATE.

>> NO, I REALLY DON'T THINK

CATHERINE'S DESPERATE.

I GET HER, ACTUALLY.

>> YOU?

YOU'RE THE MOST ANTI-ROMANTIC

PERSON THAT I'VE EVER MET, AND

YOU UNDERSTAND THE NEEDIEST

WOMAN EVER WRITTEN?

>> BUT SHE ISN'T NEEDY -- OR

INDECISIVE, EVEN.

I MEAN, SHE'S RIGHT.

LIKE, HERE SHE'S TALKING ABOUT

HEATHCLIFF, AND SHE SAYS,

"WHATEVER OUR SOULS ARE MADE OF,

HIS AND MINE ARE THE SAME, AND

LINTON'S IS AS DIFFERENT AS A

MOONBEAM FROM LIGHTNING AS FROST

FROM FIRE."

BUT SHE STILL TAKES HIM.

YOU KNOW?

I MEAN, SHE REPRESENTS THAT

TYPICAL HUMAN STRUGGLE, THAT --

THAT CONFLICTING NEED FOR

CONSISTENCY -- LINTON -- AND

PASSION -- HEATHCLIFF.

>> WOW.

>> WHAT?

>> UH, YOU JUST DESCRIBED ME.

I'M TOTALLY CATHERINE.

>> OKAY.

>> NO, IT'S TRUE.

I MEAN, GREG IS MY LINTON.

HE'S ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING THAT

I COULD EVER WANT IN A GUY,

BUT HE'S JUST...

HE DOESN'T...

HAVEN'T YOU EVER WANTED TO BE

THROWN UP AGAINST A WALL AND

KISSED HARD?

>> YEAH.

I'M USUALLY THE ONE DOING THE

THROWING, THOUGH.

>> [ CHUCKLES ] YEAH.

SO, MAYBE IF I INITIATED IT MORE

WITH GREG...

>> OR MAYBE YOU SHOULD JUST

START KISSING OTHER PEOPLE.

>> OH.

[ INDISTINCT TALKING ON

TELEVISION ]

>> WHERE WERE YOU ALL DAY?

>> WITH BRIDGET.

>> ALL DAY?

>> YEAH, GREG, ALL DAY.

>> ALL RIGHT.

>> WHAT?

>> I JUST SAID, "ALL RIGHT."

>> IF SHE WASN'T GAY, WOULD WE

BE HAVING THIS CONVERSATION?

>> NO.

>> THAT'S OFFENSIVE.

[ CROWD CHEERING ]

>> BOYCE TAKES THE HAND-OFF.

...BOUNCES OFF THE...

HE'S HIGH-STEPPING, AND HE'S IN

FOR THE SCORE.

A TREMENDOUS, POWERFUL RUN...

>> HE'S NOT COMING, IS HE?

>> HE STILL MIGHT COME.

>> I'VE CALLED HIM LIKE A

THOUSAND TIMES.

HE'S NOT COMING.

>> IT'S DOUBLE OVERTIME.

HE'S NOT COMING.

>> ...WORKING HIS HARD COUNT...

>> GOD FORBID HE PICK UP A

PHONE.

>> BUT IT'S DOUBLE OVERTIME.

>> SHUT UP.

>> ...SHOOTS UP THE MIDDLE...

>> HOPE YOU LIKE THE BALLET.

>> ...TAKING IT OUTSIDE, PAST

THE 10, DOWN TO THE 5...

NOW, HOPEFULLY HE'LL SLIDE INTO

PROTECTIVE ZONE, BUT, NO, HE'S

DIVING FOR THE GOAL LINE...

>> DAMN IT.

>> SO, WHY DIDN'T YOU GO AGAIN?

>> I HATE THE BALLET.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

SHE'S GONNA KILL YOU.

>> NAH. DOUBLE OVERTIME.

SHE'LL UNDERSTAND.

>> OKAY.

>> AND TECHNICALLY IT'S STILL

OUR ANNIVERSARY.

I HAVEN'T MISSED IT YET.

>> HMM.

SHE'S GONNA KILL YOU.

>> NO. SHE LOVES THESE THINGS.

SHE'S GONNA LOVE IT.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

MNM.

[ TONGUE CLICKS ]

JUST DOESN'T SEEM LIKE...

QUITE...

>> ENOUGH.

>> YEAH.

>> SHE'S GONNA KILL ME.

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATION ]

[ TCHAIKOVSKY'S "SWAN LAKE"

PLAYING ]

I'M SORRY...

REALLY, REALLY SORRY.

>> [ EXHALES SHARPLY ]

>> UM, I ACTUALLY GOT TO --

>> YEAH.

>> I'M GONNA GO AHEAD AND...

>> [ CLEARS THROAT ]

>> I-I DON'T, UH...

I DON'T EXPECT YOU TO FORGIVE

ME, BUT I HOPE YOU CAN GIVE ME A

SECOND CHANCE.

>> SECOND?

>> ALL RIGHT, 22nd, 34th, 42nd

CHANCE.

>> YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW YOU MADE

ME FEEL.

>> YOU'RE RIGHT.

I COMPLETELY LET YOU DOWN.

I'M SO SORRY.

OOH. I-I GOT YOU THIS.

IT'S YOUR FAVORITE.

>> A CUPCAKE AND SOME CANDLES,

AND I'M SUPPOSED TO FORGIVE YOU?

COME ON, TRIP.

IT'S OUR ANNIVERSARY, AND I HAD

TO GO TO THE BALLET WITH

BRIDGET.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

>> A BALLET...FOR YOU.

>> TRIP --

>> Shh.

[ MUSIC CONTINUES ]

TRIP.

[ LAUGHING ]

[ PANTING ]

[ CHUCKLES ]

I FORGIVE YOU.

>> MM-HMM?

>> MM-HMM.

>> MM-HMM?

GOOD.

>> I LOVE YOU.

>> I'M SORRY.

>> I KNOW.

ARE YOU WEARING A DANCE BELT?

HOT.

[ MUSIC CONTINUES ]

>> [ GRUNTS ]

>> [ LAUGHS ]

>> Both: [ BREATHING HEAVILY ]

>> LOOK AT ME.

>> WHAT?

>> CAN -- CAN WE, UH, DO THIS

OVER THERE?

[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]

[ WATER RUNNING ]

YO, MAN.

>> WHAT'S UP, ASSHOLE?

>> GOOD.

YOU SAVED MY ASS LAST NIGHT.

>> HEY, MAN, YOU SUCK.

>> HUH?

I DON'T KNOW.

SHE'S PRETTY MUCH PERFECT.

YOU SHOULD HAVE GONE.

>> THANK YOU.

AND NEXT TIME I NEED

RELATIONSHIP ADVICE, I'LL ASK

YOUR GIRLFRIEND.

>> PERFECT.

>> * EVERYTHING'S MOVING FROM

GREEN TO RED *

* IF YOU ASK ME, I WANT TO STAY

IN BED *

* THE CLOCK IS SCREAMING

* IT'S A QUARTER TILL

>> LOVE YOU.

>> LOVE YOU, TOO.

>> I'LL BE BACK IN A FEW DAYS.

>> * TICKS IN RHYTHM WITH

RAINDROPS ON THE SILL *

* TRY OUR BEST TO PLAN OUR

FUTURE *

* TRY TO BELIEVE

* TRY TO CONTROL THE CYCLE AND

JUST CLING TO THE TREES *

* AND THE LEAVES AND WE

* WE WANT TO STAY GREEN

* BUT IT ALL GOES AROUND

* THE SEASONS TURN INEVITABLY

AND WE ALL FALL DOWN *

* AND DOWN

* AND DOWN

* AND DOWN

* AND DOWN

[ KEYS JINGLE ]

>> I'M SORRY.

I'M SORRY!

>> LET IT GO.

>> I JUST CAN'T TAKE YOUR

PARENTS FOR THAT LONG.

I JUST FEEL SUFFOCATED.

>> YEAH, I KNOW THE FEELING.

[ CAN OPENS ]

WHAT?

>> I JUST THINK IT WAS TOO

STRESSFUL FOR US.

THAT'S ALL.

>> SURE.

>> NO.

>> [ SMOOCHES ]

>> NO. NOT NOW.

>> [ SMOOCHES ]

>> NO. STOP. YOU'RE DRUNK.

>> [ PANTING ]

>> NO.

GREG, STOP.

>> [ PANTING ]

[ MOANING ]

>> NO, GREG. NO, DON'T.

>> AAH!

[ PANTING ]

>> [ Voice breaking ] NO!

STOP!

>> OOH, GOD!

>> GREG, GET OFF!

>> HEY, LOVE.

>> CHLOE.

CHLOE.

CHLOE?

[ DOOR SLAMS ]

>> DON'T FOLLOW ME!

[ DOOR SLAMS ]

[ DOOR CLOSES ]

>> FUCK.

I FUCKED UP.

YEAH.

[ CELLPHONE RINGING ]

HEY.

>> I NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE.

>> NOW?

>> Can you meet me?

>> Okay. I'll meet you halfway?

>> YEAH.

>> OKAY.

>> Okay.

>> BYE.

[ SNIFFLES ]

[ KEYPAD BEEPS ]

[ CHUCKLES ]

>> [ SCOFFS ]

>> YOU GONNA TALK?

>> NO.

>> YOU CALL ME AT 3:00 IN THE

MORNING.

YOU'RE NOT GONNA TELL ME WHY?

>> NO.

>> CLASSIC.

[ SNIFFLES ]

[ SNIFFLES ]

I FOUND A DANCE BELT IN TRIP'S

LAUNDRY THE OTHER DAY.

YOU KNOW, A DANCE BELT'S THE

THING THAT KEEPS HIS, UM --

>> BALLS.

>> DON'T SAY "BALLS."

I DON'T DO BALLS.

>> [ CHUCKLES ] RIGHT.

>> ONCE, THOUGH.

>> REALLY?

>> YEAH, I WAS YOUNG.

I DIDN'T KNOW ANY BETTER.

>> [ LAUGHS ]

>> HE WORE A SWEATBAND.

>> ON HIS BALLS?

>> ON HIS HEAD.

IT WAS A HEAD SWEATBAND.

>> [ LAUGHS ] WHY?

>> TO KEEP THE PRODUCT IN HIS

HAIR FROM TRICKLING DOWN ONTO

HIS FACE.

IT WAS TO PREVENT BREAKOUTS.

>> WOW.

>> I KNOW.

[ BOTH LAUGH ]

>> YOU'RE FUN.

>> THANK YOU.

>> EVERYTHING ELSE JUST...

GOES AWAY.

I NEED TO STAY WITH YOU FOR A

LITTLE WHILE.

>> I FART IN MY SLEEP.

>> [ LAUGHS ]

>> SO, IF THAT'S OKAY, THEN...

>> THANK YOU.

>> THERE'S THAT LOOK AGAIN.

HEY.

SO, WE HAVE MILK OR $2 WINE FROM

THE DELI.

$2 WINE.

>> OKAY.

[ WOMAN SINGING IN SPANISH ]

>> * BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM

* BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM

* BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM

* BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM

* BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM

* BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM

* BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM, BUM

* BU-U-U-U-M

[ SINGING IN SPANISH CONTINUES ]

>> SHE'S JUST STAYING WITH YOU?

>> YEAH.

>> AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHY?

>> NO.

>> DID YOU ASK?

>> [ Laughing ] NO.

>> DID YOU SLEEP WITH HER?

>> NO!

>> DO YOU LIKE HER?

>> SHE'S OKAY.

>> SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND.

>> HOW YOU HOLDING UP?

>> I'M FINE.

>> SO, YOU HAVE SEEN HER?

>> YEP.

MOLLY'S DEFINITELY STAYING HERE.

>> [ SCOFFS ]

WHY WOULD SHE STAY HERE?

>> I DON'T KNOW, BUT I WOULDN'T

LET MY GIRLFRIEND STAY WITH

BRIDGET.

>> MOLLY'S NOT GAY.

>> BRIDGET IS.

>> [ SIGHS ]

>> SHE'S NOT A CHEATER.

>> YOU DON'T KNOW THAT.

>> [ SNIFFLES ]

TRIP, WHY DID YOU CHEAT ON

CHLOE?

>> HONESTLY?

I DIDN'T KNOW SHE'D BE HOME SO

EARLY.

I THOUGHT I HAD ANOTHER DAY.

>> * I'M DRIVING WEST

* SPEEDING TOO FAST

* I KEEP ON RUNNING

* THE SLEEP IS JUST NOT COMING

TO ME *

[ HORN HONKS ]

>> I HAD SOMETHING TO SAY.

I SWEAR.

I JUST DON'T REMEMBER WHAT IT

WAS.

I'M...

I'M SORRY.

I CAN'T LET YOU GO. I WON'T.

GIVE ME ANOTHER CHANCE.

PLEASE?

[ ROSIN MURPHY'S "RAMALAMA (BANG

BANG)" PLAYS ]

>> * COULD A BODY CLOSE THE MIND

OUT? *

* STITCH A SEAM ACROSS THE EYE

* IF YOU CAN BE GOOD, YOU'LL

LIVE FOREVER *

* IF YOU'RE BAD, YOU'LL DIE WHEN

YOU DIE *

* HEARING ONLY ONE TRUE NOTE

* I'M THE ONE AND ONLY SOUND

* UNZIP MY BODY

* TAKE MY HEART OUT

* 'CAUSE I NEED A BEAT TO GIVE

THIS TUNE *

[ GLASSES CLINK ]

* OOH, OOH

* OOH, OOH

>> HEY, IT'S JUST LIKE OLD

TIMES.

>> NOT REALLY, NO.

>> OH, GOD, I'M GLAD THIS YEAR'S

OVER.

>> RIGHT?

>> I HAD A GREAT YEAR, ACTUALLY.

>> I HAD THE WORST YEAR OF MY

LIFE.

THAT'S WHY MY NEW YEAR'S

RESOLUTION IS TO DRINK AS MUCH

AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE SO I CAN

FORGET.

>> GREAT, GREG.

>> * HEARING ONLY ONE ROOT

NOTE *

* PLANTED FIRMLY IN THE GROUND

* UNDO MY HEART

* UNZIP MY BODY

* AND LEND TO MY EAR A CLEAR AND

A DEAFENING SOUND *

* OOH, OOH

* OOH, OOH

* UNZIP MY HEART

* OOH, OOH

* OOH, OHH

* AND IF I NEED A RHYTHM

* IT'LL BE TO MY HEART I

LISTEN *

* IF IT DON'T PUT ME TOO FAR

WRONG *

>> OH, SO, WHAT'S YOUR

RESOLUTION?

>> * AND IF I NEED A RHYTHM

>> I DON'T KNOW YET.

>> Never have I ever been thrown

up against a wall and kissed

hard.

>> BRIDGET.

>> Never have I ever been turned

down.

>> BRIDGET.

BRIDGET!

>> WHAT?

>> WHAT'S YOUR NEW YEAR'S

RESOLUTION?

>> STOP SMOKING.

>> REALLY?

>> NO.

>> HEY, TRIP, WHERE'S CHLOE?

>> * GONNA BE TO MY HEART I

LISTEN *

* AND IF I, AND IF I NEED A

RHYTHM *

* IT'S GONNA BE TO MY HEART I

LISTEN *

* NEED A RHYTHM, NEED A RHYTHM,

NEED A RHYTHM *

* NEED A RHYTHM, NEED A RHYTHM,

NEED A RHYTHM *

[ DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ]

>> [ BREATHING HEAVILY ]

[ DOOR OPENS ]

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

[ DOOR CLOSES ]

>> OKAY?

>> YEAH.

>> YEAH?

>> UH-HUH.

[ ADERBAT'S "BUSTED CARS"

PLAYING ]

>> * BY THE BUSTED CARS

* BY THE SIGNS YOU'LL SEE

* THERE'S NO OUTLET HERE WHERE

YOU'LL FIND ME *

* WHAT HAVE I BECOME?

>> [ GASPS ]

>> Both: [ BREATHING HEAVILY ]

>> * WE GO WALKING

* WITH ONE EYE CLOSED

>> GREG, GREG, GREG, GREG, GREG.

>> DUDE, THEY'RE GONNA MISS THE

COUNTDOWN.

>> DUDE, FUCK 'EM.

>> Both: [ MOANING ]

* ...AT ALL?

* DO I TRUST YOU AT ALL?

* DO I TRUST YOU?

>> All: 9...

8...

7...

6...

5...

4...

3...

2...

1!

>> * YOU CAN GO BACK

* YOU CAN CRAWL BACK INTO YOUR

SHELL *

* WITH YOUR HOLY IDEAS

* YOU CAN CONCENTRATE ON SOMEONE

ELSE *

* LIKE THE PICTURES THAT BLOCK

YOUR WALLS *

* LIKE THE FRAME THAT'S

AROUND... *

>> HEY.

HAPPY NEW YEAR, MAN.

[ GLASSES CLINK ]

>> YEAH, YOU TOO.

>> Both: [ BREATHING HEAVILY ]

>> COME HOME WITH ME.

>> WHAT?

NO.

>> PLEASE.

>> I CAN'T.

>> [ SIGHS ] SHIT.

>> [ SIGHS ]

>> PLEASE COME HOME WITH ME.

>> WE SHOULD GET BACK OUT THERE.

>> YOU MISSED EVERYTHING.

>> WE DID?

>> YEAH.

>> HAPPY NEW YEAR.

>> STOP FUCKING HIS GIRLFRIEND.

>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE

TALKING ABOUT.

>> OH.

>> TRIP. TRIP.

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

[ INTERCOM BUZZES ]

TRIP?

[ CHUCKLES ] FUCKER.

[ BEEP ]

HI.

>> HI.

I PUT HIM TO BED.

>> COME HERE.

>> Both: [ SMOOTHING ]

>> [ GASPS ]

>> I WANT TO SEE YOU.

>> OKAY.

[ EXHALES SLOWLY ]

NEVER HAVE I EVER.

BYE.

>> ARE YOU COMING TO BED?

>> * ...TO GRAB MY COLLAR

* GRAB MY COLLAR

* GRAB MY COLLAR

* SHE KNOWS HOW TO DANCE AND

HOLLER *

* DANCE AND HOLLER

* DANCE AND HOLLER

>> HEY, BRIDGE, YOU WANT TO COME

OUT WITH ME TODAY?

>> CAN'T.

>> GREAT.

>> * FILL WITH SORROW

* FILL WITH SORROW

* SHE WILL MAKE IT A BETTER

TOMORROW *

* BETTER TOMORROW

* BETTER TOMORROW

* I CAN TELL

* IT'S JUST AS WELL

* SHE KNOWS HOW TO SHUT MY MOUTH

UP *

* SHUT MY MOUTH UP

* SHUT MY MOUTH UP

* SHE KNOWS WHY THINGS WILL LOOK

UP *

* THINGS WILL LOOK UP

* IT'S GONNA GET BETTER NOW

* HALF THE TIME

* I'M HALF A MAN

>> WHAT DID YOU THINK ABOUT

THAT, THOUGH?

>> [ LAUGHS ]

[ CELLPHONE RINGING ]

OKAY.

>> WAIT.

>> I CAN'T REACH ANYTHING.

>> [ LAUGHS ]

>> IT'S IN HERE.

>> [ LAUGHS ] SO DISORGANIZED.

OH, SHIT.

[ KEYPAD BEEPS ]

HI, MOM.

YEAH, NO, I'M GREAT.

GREG'S GREAT.

WE'RE GREAT, MOM, YEAH.

>> * FOR EVERYTHING WE DO

[ DOOR CREAKS ]

>> What's going on?

>> I'M SORRY.

I'M JUST DOING A FINAL

SWEEP-THROUGH FOR MY STUFF.

>> I don't have anything here.

>> I CAN'T FIND MY HAIR

STRAIGHTENER.

>> Okay, I can just drop it

off --

>> WHY CAN'T I JUST LOOK FOR IT

NOW?

>> Well, I'm just sort of in the

middle of something.

>> I'M SORRY, BUT I CAN BE

TOTALLY QUIET.

>> No, can you just --

>> MORNING, HONEY.

>> OH, MY GOD. I KNEW IT.

I FUCKING KNEW IT.

YOU'RE AN IDIOT. YOU KNOW THAT?

>> YEAH, NO, I KNOW.

>> IT'S ALL MY FAULT.

>> YOU'RE RIGHT. IT IS.

IT IS ALL YOUR FAULT.

YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND.

THIS IS ABSURD.

PLEASE TELL ME YOU WERE DRUNK

LAST NIGHT.

OH!

THIS IS A SOBER BRILLIANT IDEA.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?

>> I DON'T KNOW.

>> DID YOU KNOW THAT CHLOE'S

COMING IN?

>> [ SIGHS ] GREAT.

THIS HAS BEEN A WONDERFUL

MORNING.

>> YEP.

>> [ SIGHS ] WHATEVER.

JUST GIVE ME A CALL WHEN YOU GET

YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS.

>> FUCK.

ARE YOU ATTRACTED TO ME?

>> WHAT?

>> ARE YOU ATTRACTED TO ME?

>> YOU OKAY?

>> CAN YOU ANSWER THE QUESTION?

>> I-I DON'T KNOW IF THAT

DESERVES AN ANSWER.

>> COME ON.

>> WHAT?

>> DO YOU WANT ME?

>> I WANT THIS.

>> THAT'S NOT WHAT I ASKED.

>> YEAH, IT IS.

>> YOU WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR

THIS?

>> FOR US, YES.

>> KISS ME.

>> WHAT?

>> IF YOU WANT ME, KISS ME RIGHT

NOW.

>> [ EXHALES ]

MOLLY, I KNOW THAT YOUR FAVORITE

FLOWER'S THE GERBERA DAISY.

AND I KNOW THAT YOU GET BLOTCHY

WHEN YOU HAVE TO SPEAK IN FRONT

OF A GROUP OF PEOPLE.

I KNOW WHAT YOUR SHOES SOUND

LIKE COMING DOWN A FLIGHT OF

STAIRS.

I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO KISS YOU TO

PROVE THAT I LOVE YOU.

>> I DIDN'T ASK IF YOU LOVED ME.

I ASKED IF YOU WANTED ME.

>> I DON'T SEE THE DIFFERENCE.

>> WHY DON'T YOU HAVE A

GIRLFRIEND?

>> I DON'T KNOW.

>> OH. HERE.

>> OOH. SCENTED OR UNSCENTED?

>> SCENTED.

DO YOU WANT ONE?

>> A GIRLFRIEND OR A DRYER

SHEET?

>> BOTH.

>> NO AND YES, RESPECTIVELY.

>> WHY DON'T YOU?

>> WHY DON'T I WHAT?

>> WANT ONE?

>> I DON'T KNOW.

NO ONE CAN HOLD MY INTEREST FOR

LONG ENOUGH, I GUESS.

>> OH.

SO, IF SOMEONE COULD HOLD YOUR

INTEREST, THEN...

>> THEN I'D HAVE A GIRLFRIEND,

YEAH.

OH.

>> SO, WHAT'S IT LIKE?

>> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

>> BEING SINGLE, I MEAN.

>> YOU OKAY?

>> AREN'T YOU SICK OF PEOPLE

SAYING THAT YOU GUYS ARE SO CUTE

TOGETHER OR THAT SHE'S SO

PERFECT?

SHE'S NOT.

CHLOE WASN'T.

>> YOU THINK THERE'S SOMEONE

ELSE?

>> THERE'S ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE.

[ SPATULA SCRAPING ]

IT'S GONNA SCRATCH THE PAN.

[ SCRAPING INTENSIFIES ]

UGH.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING,

MAN.

I MEAN, I CAN'T BE HER

GIRLFRIEND.

WHAT DOES SHE WANT?

OH, IT'S REALLY HARD.

YOU JUST WANT --

DID THAT JUST HAPPEN?

>> OH, I'M SORRY.

WERE YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF

SOMETHING?

>> I'M NOT DOING THIS RIGHT NOW.

SHE'S INTO ME.

THAT'S ALL I WANTED TO SAY.

>> SO, SHE IS YOUR GIRLFRIEND?

>> NO.

>> CALL ME CRAZY.

ISN'T SHE GREG'S GIRLFRIEND?

>> STOP, PLEASE.

>> SORRY, TUESDAY.

>> WHAT?

>> IS FRIDAY BETTER? WEDNESDAY?

>> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

>> YOU'RE HER DAY OF THE WEEK.

>> AND YOU'RE A PRICK, TRIP.

I'M A PRICK?

NO, NO, NO, NO.

BRIDGET, DON'T WALK AWAY FROM

ME.

>> BUT I CAN'T DO THIS.

I REALLY CAN'T TELL YOU HOW I

FEEL RIGHT NOW.

>> WHY?

YOU TALKED TO CHLOE, MY

EX-GIRLFRIEND.

>> I DIDN'T HAVE ANYONE ELSE TO

TALK TO.

>> WHAT ABOUT ME?

DUDE, WE'VE BEEN INSEPARABLE FOR

YEARS.

I MEAN, WE USED TO TALK ABOUT

EVERYTHING, AND NOW YOU CAN'T

COME AND TALK TO ME?

>> I'M SORRY.

>> GOOD.

OH, BY THE WAY...

I TOLD GREG EVERYTHING.

[ KEYS JINGLE ]

>> HI.

>> HI.

>> I'VE ALWAYS WANTED THIS TO

WORK, BUT I DON'T SEE HOW IT

CAN.

>> WHY -- WHY WOULD YOU SAY

THAT?

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

I'M NOT GONNA LIE TO YOU.

A HUGE PART OF ME WANTS TO

LEAVE.

I WANT TO LEAVE YOU RIGHT NOW,

BUT...I KNOW THAT YOU'RE WORTH

IT.

DON'T LOOK AWAY.

YOU CAN'T SEE HER ANYMORE.

[ DOOR SLAMS ]

>> HI.

>> DON'T.

I'M GETTING MARRIED AT ST.

JOHN'S ON CHAPEL STREET IN

DOWNTOWN WESTPORT.

I KNOW WHAT MY DRESS LOOKS LIKE,

AND I HAVE ALWAYS KNOWN THAT MY

DAD WOULD WALK ME DOWN THE

AISLE.

YOU COULD NEVER BE AT THE END OF

THAT AISLE.

>> WHY?

>> I CAN'T DO THIS.

I BROKE SOMEONE'S HEART,

BRIDGET.

HE LOVES ME, AND I BROKE HIM.

>> I'M SORRY.

>> I FEEL SICK, BRIDGET.

TO SEE SOMEONE EVERY DAY, TO

KISS HIM, AND TO KISS YOU --

>> I DON'T WANT TO THINK OF YOU

LIKE THAT.

>> TOUGH SHIT.

THIS IS WHAT I AM.

THIS IS WHO I AM NOW.

>> BUT WE DID THIS.

>> I WAS OKAY WITH MY LIFE BEING

JUST OKAY.

I CAN'T DO THIS.

I NEED MY LIFE BACK, AND YOU

CANNOT BE A PART OF IT ANYMORE.

I'M SORRY.

[ BREATHING HEAVILY ]

>> * YOU

* YOU CAN'T SEE

>> YOU OKAY?

>> * ALL OF ME EASILY

>> YEAH.

>> THAT SOUNDS ABOUT RIGHT.

>> * IT DOESN'T TAKE A LOT...

>> BABY, BABY, BABY.

BABY, LOOK AT ME.

>> NO.

>> SHUT UP. YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL.

LOOK AT ME.

>> WHAT?

>> UM, WHAT DO YOU WANT THE

WORLD TO KNOW TODAY?

>> I LOVE YOU.

LOOK AT THAT.

WHAT DO YOU WANT THE WORLD TO

KNOW TODAY?

>> I LOVE YOU.

>> ONE MORE TIME.

>> I LOVE YOU.

>> ONE MORE TIME.

>> I LOVE YOU.

I LOVE YOU.

>> * SO YOU

* YOU CAN NOD MY WAY

* POLITELY

* YOU CAN SMILE RIGHT AT ME

KNOWINGLY *

[ WATER RUNNING ]

>> YOU GOING TO MOLLY'S BIRTHDAY

THING TONIGHT?

>> NOPE. YOU?

>> NOPE.

>> NO ONE'S EVER TALKED TO ME

THE WAY THAT YOU DO.

YOU MAKE ME FEEL SO VULNERABLE,

AND I JUST...

[ INHALES SHARPLY ]

YEAH, NO, THIS IS DIFFICULT TO

DO WHEN YOU'RE SITTING THERE

BLATANTLY IGNORING ME.

>> MMM. I'M NOT IGNORING.

I'M PRE-GAMING.

>> GREAT.

OKAY, OKAY, SO, I WALK IN, DRINK

WITH YOU, AND PRETEND LIKE I'M

NOT THINKING ABOUT HER.

AND THEN I PULL HER ASIDE, AND I

TELL HER THAT I HAVE TO TALK TO

HER AND THAT THERE'S NO OTHER

TIME, BUT NOW.

>> GREAT.

AND WHEN SHE SAYS SHE CAN'T

BECAUSE SHE LOVES HER BOYFRIEND,

YOU WALK AWAY.

>> I WALK AWAY.

>> PERFECT.

>> YEAH, JUST EMBARRASS THE SHIT

OUT OF MYSELF, AND THEN ONCE I

THINK IT CAN'T GET ANY WORSE...

>> IT DOES.

>> ...IT DOES.

[ CHUCKLES ] EW.

>> YOU SWEAR TRIP WON'T BE

THERE?

IF TRIP'S THERE, I'LL GIVE YOU A

RIM JOB.

>> IT'S A WIN-WIN.

>> I THINK I NEED TO BORROW

SOMETHING TO WEAR.

>> I'LL GIVE YOU THAT GRAY

V-NECK THAT YOU LIKE, BUT YOU

HAVE TO GIVE IT BACK.

>> I THINK I NEED SOMETHING

HOTTER.

>> I HAVE A LITTLE BLACK TIE.

>> HOW ABOUT A LITTLE BLACK

DRESS?

[ MID-TEMPO ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ]

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

>> HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

>> THANK YOU.

>> HEY.

>> HEY.

>> WHERE YOU BEEN HIDING?

>> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

>> I DON'T KNOW.

I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN A WHILE.

>> OH, YEAH.

I'VE JUST BEEN SPENDING MORE

TIME WITH MOLLY.

SHE'S...YOU KNOW...

IT'S HARD WHEN YOU'RE IN A NEW

PLACE.

THE CITY'S BEEN TOUGH ON US.

>> OKAY.

>> AND, UH, WE'RE JUST TRYING TO

WORK THINGS OUT.

I KNOW.

I KNOW THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT TO

YOU, BUT IT IS TO US.

>> EXCUSE ME?

>> THERE ARE JUST A LOT MORE

WAYS TO MESS UP HERE, AND I

DON'T WANT THAT.

NEITHER OF US WANT THAT.

>> OKAY.

>> I THOUGHT SHE WASN'T COMING.

>> SHE WASN'T.

>> I THOUGHT YOU SAID HE WASN'T

GONNA BE HERE.

>> THAT'S WHAT HE SAID.

>> I FUCKING NEED A DRINK.

>> YEAH, ME TOO.

I CAN'T DO THIS.

YOU CAN'T LEAVE.

>> I'M NOT GONNA LEAVE.

I'M JUST NOT NECESSARILY GONNA

STAY, EITHER.

>> JUST DRINK.

>> I CAN'T DO THIS.

I HAVE TO GO TALK TO HER.

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

>> SEE YOU LATER, GREG.

>> HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

>> CUTE DRESS.

>> THANK YOU.

[ CHUCKLES ]

I HAVE TO TALK TO YOU.

>> I CAN'T.

I CAN'T DO THIS TO HIM.

THANK YOU FOR COMING.

>> SURE.

THAT WENT WELL.

[ CONVERSATIONS CONTINUE ]

>> AND TO THE FIRST POSITION.

SECOND POSITIO-- SORRY, MAN.

>> [ LAUGHS ]

>> AND PLIé.

AND UP.

>> [ LAUGHS ]

>> AND BREATHE.

HOW DID I LOOK?

>> LOOKS GOOD.

>> I'VE BEEN PRACTICING.

>> I CAN TELL.

>> HEY, CAN I GET, UH, TWO

WHISKEY SODAS?

YOU LOOK GOOD.

>> [ CHUCKLES ] YOU TOO.

>> HERE YOU GO.

>> THANK YOU.

>> [ EXHALES ] THANK YOU.

>> YOU'RE COMPLETELY WELCOME.

>> * SO YOU RAN OUT TO SEATTLE

AND PORTLAND *

* BUT IT DIDN'T CHANGE A THING

>> [ SIGHS ]

>> IT'S EXACTLY LIFE, YOU KNOW?

>> HI.

>> DON'T.

NEW YORK CITY IS A PRETTY

INTERESTING PLACE, YOU KNOW?

>> OKAY.

>> YOU LEARN SHIT EVERY DAY.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

>> COME ON.

>> SOME OF -- SOME OF THE CRAZY

PEOPLE -- YOU HAVE NO IDEA.

>> OKAY, GO.

GO.

>> I LIKE YOU.

>> AND?

>> [ Chuckling ] AND I LIKE YOU.

>> THAT'S WHAT YOU HAD TO TELL

ME?

>> YEAH.

>> THIS WOULD CHANGE MY LIFE,

AND YOU LIKE ME?

>> THIS HAS ALREADY CHANGED

MINE.

>> RIGHT.

>> I'M WEARING A FREAKING DRESS,

MOLLY!

>> I WOULD HAVE TO GIVE UP SO

MUCH MORE THAN THAT TO DO THIS.

>> BUT YOU HAVEN'T GIVEN UP

ANYTHING.

[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ]

>> IS EVERYTHING OKAY?

>> HEY. HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

>> HEY. THANKS.

>> BRIDGET.

BRIDGET?

>> FUCK OFF, GREG.

>> BRIDGET!

>> WHAT?

>> GREAT PARTY, MOLLY.

>> THANKS.

>> WHERE'S BRIDGET?

>> WHERE'S GREG?

>> WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?

>> GO BACK INSIDE, MAN.

>> NO, NO, NO, I NEED TO KNOW

EVERYTHING.

>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE

TALKING ABOUT.

>> YES, YOU DO! YOU DO KNOW!

WHAT DO YOU HAVE THAT I DON'T?

>> NOTHING.

>> DON'T WALK AWAY FROM ME.

>> WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY TO

YOU?

>> WHY ARE YOU BETTER AT THIS

THAN I AM?

>> WE TALK, LAUGH. WE LISTEN.

>> NO, NO, NO, HOW DO YOU FUCK

HER BETTER THAN I DO?

>> STOP.

>> HOW DO YOU FUCK HER?

>> I DON'T.

>> YOU -- YOU CAN'T. YOU CAN'T.

YOU DON'T EVEN HA--

>> I CAN.

>> HOW?

>> IT'S DIFFERENT EVERY TIME.

>> YOU FUCKING DYKE.

>> GREG!

>> I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR HER!

>> GREG!

>> ANYTHING!

>> THEN LET HER GO!

>> DUDE, GET OFF HER!

>> BRIDGET!

SHIT! BRIDGET!

BRIDGET, WAIT!

BRIDGET, ARE YOU OKAY?

ARE YOU HURT?

>> NO.

>> DID HE HURT YOU?

>> NO.

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME?

>> THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH

YOU.

>> THEN WHY IS SHE STILL WITH

HIM?

>> THEY HAVE A PAST. I GET THAT.

LOOK AT TRIP.

>> THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH

TRIP, CHLOE.

>> YEAH, WELL --

>> NO, NO, TRIP JUST SAVED MY

ASS, OKAY?

AND THAT IS WHAT GIRLS WANT.

THEY WANT THEIR -- THEIR SCHMUCK

OF A HEATHCLIFF TO COME IN FROM

NOWHERE AND "LINTON" THEM.

>> WHAT?

>> I'M SORRY.

I'M TRYING TO LINTON LIKE THE

VERB.

>> ARE YOU MAKING CASUAL

"WUTHERING HEIGHTS" REFERENCES?

>> YEAH.

>> THAT'S WEIRD.

>> I CAN BE BOTH.

I MEAN, I CAN BE.

I-I CAN BE THE -- THE UNRELIABLE

DOUCHE NOZZLE WHO GRABS HER ASS

IN PUBLIC AND -- AND WEARS WORK

BOOTS, BUT I CAN ALSO BE THE ONE

WHO HOLDS DOORS FOR HER AND

TUCKS HER IN AT NIGHT AND --

AND BUYS HER FUCKING GERBERA

DAISIES FOR NO GODDAMN REASON!

>> I KNOW YOU CAN.

>> I'M GONNA GO KICK HIS ASS

RIGHT NOW.

>> NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.

COME ON, BRIDGE.

>> NO, I'M DONE WITH THIS!

>> DON'T SAY THAT.

>> I JUST DID.

DID SHE GO HOME WITH HIM?

>> I DON'T KNOW.

>> FUCK!

>> I DON'T THINK SO.

>> YOU FUCKING STRAIGHT GIRLS --

YOU'RE ALL JUST A BUNCH OF

FUCKING CLOSET CASES!

MAYBE WE SHOULD ALL JUST DATE

GUYS.

I MEAN, MAYBE I SHOULD HAVE A

FUCKING BOYFRIEND!

MY HEART IS, LIKE, ON THE FLOOR

RIGHT NOW!

I WISH A CAR WOULD JUST COME AND

FUCKING HIT ME!

>> WANT ME TO HAIL A CAB?

>> NO, I'M TALKING BUS!

>> GREAT.

>> GODDAMN IT, I HATE HER.

>> NO, YOU DON'T.

>> YES, I DO. I DO.

I HATE HER!

I HATED HER FROM THE SECOND I

SAW HER!

>> NO, YOU DON'T.

>> I HATE HER! I HATE HER!

>> BRIDGET --

>> I HATE HER! I HATE HER!

I...

DON'T HATE HER.

>> I HAD NOTHING TO SAY TO HER.

>> RIGHT.

>> I THINK I ACTUALLY SAID TO

HER, "YOU'RE COMPLETELY

WELCOME."

"YOU'RE COMPLETELY WELCOME."

WHO SAYS THAT?

>> NO ONE.

[ CHUCKLES ]

>> THANKS.

UGH.

>> WHAT?

>> WHAT DO YOU MEAN "WHAT?"

I LOST HER.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT I LOST HER.

SHE JUST...GOT ME.

YOU KNOW?

IT WAS EASY.

IT NEVER FELT LIKE WE HAD TO TRY

AT ANYTHING.

WE JUST FELL INTO THIS THING,

AND WE COULD ALWAYS JUST BE

OURSELVES.

ARE TEARS REALLY MADE OUT OF THE

SAME THINGS AS BOOGERS?

>> YEAH.

>> I TASTE THE BOOGERS, YOU

KNOW.

I LIKE THE WAY THAT CHLOE LOOKS

AT ME.

>> YOU SHOULD BE WITH THE PERSON

THAT...

>> GETS YOU.

>> YEAH.

>> YEAH.

[ CLICKING ]

[ CELLPHONE VIBRATING ]

>> HEY.

IS EVERYTHING OKAY?

GOOD.

[ DOOR CLOSES ]

>> [ SIGHS ]

[ INHALES DEEPLY ]

ASSHOLE.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

[ HORN HONKS ]

FUCKER.

>> HEY.

>> HI.

>> I LIKE THE WAY WE FEEL

TOGETHER.

WE FIT.

I'VE -- I'VE NEVER FIT WITH

ANYONE THE WAY THAT WE DO.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'D DO IF I

THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER KISS ME

AGAIN.

I LOVE THE WAY YOU KISS ME,

LIKE -- LIKE YOU DON'T WANT

ANYTHING BUT TO KISS ME.

BUT...

IT ISN'T THAT EASY.

IS IT?

I REALLY DO NEED SOMEONE WHO

CHAIN-SMOKES ON STREET CORNERS

AND TALKS ABOUT BRONTE UNTIL

3:00 IN THE MORNING, BUT...

I ALSO NEED SOMEONE WHO WANTS A

FAMILY AND THAT WHOLE LIFE.

>> I TRIED.

I'M -- I'M TRYING.

>> I KNOW.

THAT'S WHY I'M HERE...WITH YOU

RIGHT NOW.

[ CHUCKLES ]

>> GOD, THERE WAS SO MUCH THAT I

WANTED TO SAY TO YOU LAST NIGHT.

BUT I COULDN'T.

UM...I CAN'T.

YOU KEEP ME INTERESTED.

THAT'S WHAT I WANTED TO SAY LAST

NIGHT.

YOU -- YOU KEEP ME COMPLETELY

INTERESTED.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> [ CHUCKLES ] THAT LOOK.

>> IT MEANS "I LOVE YOU."

>> OH.

OH.

>> SO...

[ EXHALES SHARPLY ]

>> SO...

>> * COME BY TO SEE ME

TOMORROW *

* AND BRING BACK THE LIFE THAT

YOU STOLE *

* WRAPPED UP IN BOXES OF

SORROW *

* FOREVER IN A PACKAGE I WON'T

OPEN *

* COME BY AND ASK WHAT MAKES

ME CRY *

* ENOUGH TO FEEL THE ROOM

BEGIN TO SHATTER *

* ENOUGH TO THINK THAT I DON'T

REALLY MATTER *

* YOU COME BY

* THE FIRST TIME MY FEET

* HIT YOUR STREET

* HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW

THAT YOU WOULD BE *

* ALL THAT I NEED?

* I KNOW THAT I'M NOT THE ONLY

ONE WHO LOVES YOU *

* BUT I DON'T MIND

* I DON'T MI-I-I-I-ND

* AND I WALK YOUR WAY ALMOST

EVERY DAY *

* AND EVERY TIME I SMILE

* I SMI-I-I-I-LE

* YOU DON'T HAVE TO SAY A WORD

* 'CAUSE I KNOW WHAT MY HEART

HEARD *

* THAT YOU'RE, YOU'RE ALL

MINE *

* YOU'RE ALL MINE

* LA-DEE-DA-DEE-DOO

* I LOVE YOU SO

* BECAUSE I KNOW

* YOU WILL BE WAITING FOR ME

EVEN IF I NEVER SHOW *

* OH-OH OH-OH OH-OH OH-OH

* I KNOW THAT I'M NOT THE ONLY

ONE WHO LOVES YOU *

* BUT I DON'T MIND

* I DON'T MI-I-I-I-ND

* AND I WALK YOUR WAY ALMOST

EVERY DAY *

* AND EVERY TIME I SMILE

* I SMI-I-I-I-LE

* YOU DON'T HAVE TO SAY A WORD

* 'CAUSE I KNOW WHAT MY HEART

HEARD *

* THAT YOU'RE, YOU'RE ALL

MINE *

* YOU'RE ALL MI-I-I-I-I-NE

* YOU'RE ALL MINE

* ALL MINE

* I KNOW THAT I'M NOT THE ONLY

* ONE WHO LOVES YOU

* BUT I JUST DON'T CARE

* I DON'T CA-A-A-A-RE

* 'CAUSE NO MATTER WHERE I GO

IN THIS WORLD *

* I KNOW YOU'LL ALWAYS BE

THERE *

* YOU'LL BE THE-E-E-E-RE

* YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO SPEAK

* 'CAUSE IT'S WRITTEN IN THESE

STREETS *

* THAT YOU'RE, YOU'RE ALL

MINE *

* YOU'RE ALL MINE

* LA-DEE-DA-DEE-DOO

* DOO-DOO-DOO-DOO DOO-DOO

* LA-DA-DEE-DA-DEE DOO-DOO-DOO

* DOO-DOO DOO-DOO

* LA-DEE-DA-DEE DOO

* DOO DOO