All language subtitles for Vanderpump Rules – S5E23

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German Download
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu

Original subtitles

Tonight, it's part two of the Vanderpump Rules reunion.

Well, I think any mother would be curious if their future son -in -law is

bisexual. Yeah, this is where I will get very defensive.

I don't want to beat around the bush. Were you dating a married man?

Everybody knows this, though.

Dossie's little brother, Nikolai, is here.

You are just going to be a drunk guy only thinking about having sex with

Boom, there it is. I knew you were manipulating me. If anyone's

people, it's YouTube.

Are you kidding me?

I asked you, did it come out of your bloody mouth? It was just another check

the bitchy things you guys do in life.

Your boyfriend didn't want your relationship exposed.

Because he's married?

Do not with my relationship, bitch.

I'm speaking.

How dare you?

Stop. Let me ask you a question.

Part two of the Vanderpump Rules reunion starts now.

Welcome back to the Vanderpump Rules season five reunion.

We're here with Lisa Vanderpump and the staff of SURF.

So, Jack, I saw on social media yesterday that you got some fresh Botox.

went and saw my good buddy, Dr. John Lakey. But why would you do it

It takes three days to kick in. I didn't know there was rules.

You didn't know there were rules?

There are Vanderpump rules.

But we all know those rules don't apply to me.

Lisa, we've seen you fire Kristen with no hesitation.

Why

did

you have such mixed emotions about...

Firing James.

Because I knew what was going on in his life. I knew that he was struggling

emotionally, and I just didn't want to add to his personal burden.

When I fired Kristen, I did her a favor. She was being disrespectful. She was

looking for it. Lala, you were working the night James lost his job. Do you

think other people contributed to his getting fired?

Yeah, his name's Jack Daniels.

I think it was definitely because he had been drinking.

He wasn't in control of what he was doing. And when I actually saw the

I saw that how he was more provocative.

Me? So, yes, you.

Jax, you seem thrilled that James was in the hot seat. I'm not thrilled, but you

know what? I'm a little mad about getting people fired. You can't get

fired. I mean, we're adults here. Yeah, but you can be an instigator. Were you

trying to rile him up to get him fired? Yeah, of course. Everybody, yeah. It's

fun. It's like a wind -up doll, you know? Just give him some alcohol and

him go.

I'm going to come at you whenever I feel like coming. Why? Kick out of

everywhere you go. You can't go a day without getting your ass kicked.

We need to get more cosmopolitan!

HUNTINI!

Why do you let him get you so riled up? Some people can just hit those buttons,

and I've got triggers, man. I've got triggers.

It's like... Jax knows my triggers. He knows what to say. He knows what to do.

And then the way Jax is just so cocky, like, oh, yeah, thanks for telling me

this info.

I'm gonna get him later.

You're pretty cocky yourself, too.

Watching that back, I'm like, oh, my God. Do you see what I mean? Like, it's

like exactly what I do on the tennis court. Two tennis players, you know, you

play a game of tennis, but you're doing the same action. You know what I mean?

You guys are so alike.

Tom says this all the time. He's like, you two are exactly the same. And we

really are. When I was his age, I did exactly what he's doing, if not worse.

Lisa, you gave James the advice to never touch alcohol.

Why?

Because it's like fur grows on the inside of his palms.

And I think unless he's young enough to, I think, maybe get a handle on it, but

I think he really needs to take it seriously.

Is the door open again?

I can't say it's closed.

And I've watched him closely.

And I've seen how he's progressing.

And I needed to do that because I needed him to grow up. And I knew he wouldn't

grow up if I was enabling him doing what he was doing. I think you should bring

him back.

You be quiet. Cal, he's hilarious.

I want you to stand at my birthday party.

Oh, cool.

That'd be an honor. I'd love to. You might regret those remarks.

When's your birthday party? Lisa, Lisa, I'm trying to book a gig. OK, OK, OK.

OK, I want to move on. Let's talk about Montauk. It was funny to me that Katie,

the group, needed to Google.

What a clam bake was to figure out that it's an event where you bake clams.

An outdoor social gathering at which clams and other seafood are baked or

steamed. What if we don't like clams?

You're going to pretend. Pretend like you do. If you Google it in the Urban

Dictionary, it says smoking weed in a car with the windows up, and that's what

clam bake is. And that's what I thought we were going to do.

Sheena, why were you so separate from the girl?

Keep a very specific diet that includes alcohol and the type of food I eat.

Well, we're doing green tea shots.

One of those, I will be hungover. I don't really eat fish. I'm not jumping

freezing cold. I don't care. I'm not doing it. I don't like wine. I don't

champagne. I don't like drinking anything.

About the soda and you don't eat seafood just like me. That wasn't that big

of a deal. You make it a big deal.

You make it any time I say anything about I don't want to drink anything

sugar or I said I like my flat stomach that I've worked very hard for. You guys

make me feel like shit for it. You just say I don't want to.

I would rather have a flat stomach. You don't need to think. I said that one

time. You told me it was a dick thing to say, and I never said it again. Why is

that a dick thing to say?

We were like, can you do a shot?

All right.

We're not resolving this.

Ariana, you and Stassi actually have the same birthday. I had it first.

But that just ages me, so I don't know why I would tell anyone that.

What made you want to go to Sonoma?

We really love Northern California. We love wine country.

And we've also been to a couple NASCAR races. Winery and NASCAR.

Jack, you were recovering from your third boob job.

It was my second.

Your doctor told you not to drink. I know.

Did you take his advice?

No. I started to.

You know, while he's on pain medicine, let's avoid alcohol.

Oh, yeah.

This is classic like Tom at a music festival. Always wants to go to the very

limit. We are here. We have arrived.

We made it. Put that. We are good.

Yeah.

I didn't drink heavily. I have to say that shower in the RV was... Poor

Brittany. Brittany, would you have agreed to stay in in Winnebago if you

you were going to have to shower in other people's backwashed water bottle?

I'll give you a bottle of water.

That one and that one.

That part might have changed my mind, but I love RVs. That's so fun. I did

as a kid. Redneck stream. Yeah, it's a redneck stream. Hello.

I was very pissed and annoyed, though. I can't lie. Schwartz, what was the

nastiest thing going on in that RV? I think it was honestly whatever was

in the fridge. Do you remember that report? Yeah. It was like blue change.

We had to keep the refrigerator door closed.

Dude,

it literally smells so bad.

It was like deli meat went bad or chicken or something went bad. I mean, I

understand why Lala's happier in BH.

Right. You know, it seemed like a nice olive branch that you invited Lala.

She seemed to accept the olive branch.

And then you really ghosted them the day of the trip. I mean, you just

didn't show.

You guys ever figure out what happened to Lala?

Sorry, I couldn't make it last minute.

Enjoy this celebration with close friends and family. I promise I will

up to you. Happy birthday, boo.

Um, I went into full -on panic attack mode. The fact that Jax was going and

last thing he had said to me was not very kind.

Nobody wants to be your friend.

Have I done something to make you upset?

Are you delusional? No, I mean, I feel like you... All winter long, you've been

talking shit about everybody. Okay, thank you for the Diet Coke. If you like

hold grudges and that's how you want to... I'm not holding grudges. You talk

shit about people and then say I'm sorry all of a sudden. Okay, bye. That

doesn't work that way. Thank you. Grow up.

Then I see that we're...

That they're in an RV, and I'm like, so they were going to throw me in an RV

with these people, too? We talked ahead of time before this trip about these

issues numerous times. I made it very f***ing clear that if Jack or anybody

f***ed with you, I would, like, put a stop to it immediately.

I feel like you just literally didn't feel like going.

That's why I feel like you didn't go. You know, Tom, I wish it was that

that I just didn't feel like going. This excuse and the excuse you're giving

now. Like I said, it's not an excuse. My anxiety was through the roof. I highly

doubt that is the real reason. What do you think is the reason?

Did somebody come in town that weekend or no?

No.

Your guy you were seeing at that time was in town. He lives in LA.

Well, whatever. You were with him, and you guys were, like, I don't know. You

were at the Beverly Hills Hotel.

And Tiffany told me, like, she kept telling you to go. She seemed pretty

to spend a weekend at BH with massages and cool time.

Well,

that sounds like you were, like, really anxious over things. Like, you got to go

have, like, a fun. When you put me in BH, all anxiety is going to go away.

La La, this season you claimed that your money came from childhood modeling,

then your mom, then your movie career, then you admitted that your man pays for

your car, but that you're in fact sucking dick for a lot more than Range

I love that line. So, which is it?

Well, I do come from a family that does have money. Okay.

My mother pays my rent.

I don't pay any of my own bills. My mom takes care of that, too. The Range Rover

came from your mom?

No, I have the Range Rover now.

You know, me and Jeremy were eating breakfast at one time, and somebody

literally pulled up in your car. Who was that guy?

I don't know what you're talking about. I've never let anybody take my car.

So are you sure it was mine?

Yeah. No, I remember this text, and I said that I didn't, that wasn't me.

we went up and asked the guy if he knows Lala, and he's like, yeah.

I don't know who would be in my car.

I don't want to beat around the bush.

Yeah. Were you dating a married man?

Coming up.

Everything is, I heard, I heard.

Because of everything you've heard and made up in your head, you really with my

life. So stop.

I don't want to beat around the bush.

Yeah. Were you dating a married man?

No. Are you dating a married man?

No one is ever going to get the answer they're looking for. And I'm sorry, I'm

not going to put my relationship on the forefront.

Who are you dating? Ever. And I'm not going to say that either. Are you dating

someone? I am. You are? Yeah. Is it the same person that you were dating last

summer that these ladies had all heard about?

Um, I'm not answering that question.

But Lala, just by virtue of the fact that you say everything's a secret, that

creates intrigue. Do you understand?

Right. We've all had to bleed out for this show. And if you want to come in

be friends with us and expect the same respect, then you need to bleed out too.

You do share your relationship with the show.

I try to as much as I can. I can't control another person. I talked about

Are you still with him? I wasn't honest.

Are you guys together right now? No.

Okay.

Essentially, Lala was trying to do this year what you did season three, and it

doesn't work.

No, but I didn't try to hide or lie about him.

I never lied. You just wanted to keep it out, right? I didn't want to. I begged

Patrick. I begged him. I know you didn't. It was his choice.

Yes. I'm just trying to say that we've all...

Put our lives out there, and you don't get to come in and just lie about

everything. I also don't have the right to speak about someone else's life on

national television when they did not sign up for this, and I'm leaving it at

that. I know how hard it is to have somebody that doesn't want to do it. No,

don't know.

You know nothing about my situation. Yes, I do.

You know nothing about my situation.

Well, but she was with someone who wouldn't go on the show. That part is so

simple. The rest of it, which none of you will ever know because it's nobody's

business. Because he's married?

No, Stassi, enough with the... Enough, okay? Everybody knows this, though. It's

done. It's not even a secret. Stop being a bully.

I'm not being a bully. Leave it alone.

It's not your business.

Knock it off.

Stop being a mean girl.

I'm not a mean girl.

Do not fuck with my relationship, bitch. Fall the fuck back.

Fall the fuck back.

Hold on one second. Hold on one second.

Let's chill for a second.

Lala.

The thing is, is that I would love to, like, not have any of my personal life

this show. Like, how convenient would it be for Tom and Katie to not show any of

their arguments?

They won't sign up for it. I understand. So did you. So did you, though. But he

didn't. He didn't. Yeah, but guess what? It's not fair.

It's not fair. Well, that's why I walked out, so you don't need to worry about

it. I know.

Well, you're still here. I'm still looking at you. I know. You're very

You can thank me later.

Kristen, after hearing about Lala's sketchy behavior, you resolved to take

down. Why did you think James would be the key to this?

He's the only person that we knew that was friends with her, and I think he's

easy to manipulate.

What does that really even mean? It really depends on where someone's...

you're easy to manipulate. I'm speaking.

How dare you?

Boy, Jax, he is cracking you up today.

I don't know if this is a show or what, but this is hilarious.

So the girls baited you into getting together to snitch on your friend.

Yeah. Why did you agree to meet with them? Because they had something to say,

and quite frankly, I was kind of intrigued. They sucked me in. They said

talking crap about me, and they didn't. I know for a fact that she just does

nothing but talk shit about you.

She said she does not like you. You guys are not friends.

You girls behind your girlfriend's back.

Like, no one's ever told me that before.

Wait, hold up. We did really hear that. Yeah.

We didn't lie. You sucked me in. No, but we did. We really did. No, I didn't

make that up. Yeah, you did.

This is what we were told. No, I asked you, did it come out of your bloody

mouth? It was just another check off the bitchy things you guys do in life.

Another check off your list. James, when did Lala give you an NDA to sign?

I have no idea.

Anyone who's with me where I decide to get obliterated smoke weed, there are

things that I have said in front of friends.

I was in a hotel room. My friend invited one of her friends over. She

Snapchatted me while I was high and drunk in the bathtub, butt naked.

Ever since then, it's been a known thing. I mean, you're not an A -list

celebrity. You have your friend sign NDA?

You posted an Instagram photo naked. But if you're talking about it right now,

what's the NDA do? Or NBA? I don't even know what the hell that is.

It's a non -disclosure agreement, which means you can't disclose whatever the

person that you're signing it for doesn't want you to disclose.

Okay. What's the problem with the NDA? What's the issue?

It's weird. And you signed it? No!

Lala, it sounds odd to give people NDAs. Oh, absolutely not.

Jesus Christ, absolutely not. I'm shocked that no one else does. There's

things that come out of people's mouths when I'm with my friends that I want to

know what you're posting.

Friends, shouldn't they have your back?

Some people are going to Snapchat and they're not going to eat. She's saying,

why are you letting those people in the bathtub when you're high? And that's why

we've stopped doing it. Lala, you can solve this problem a lot easier by just

not being around people that you don't trust.

Stassi, you seem certain that Tom and Ariana did sign.

So we all heard that there was an NDA at Coachella, like a contract. Okay,

whatever. You can't talk about her boyfriend. That's what we all heard. I

sign an NDA for Coachella. Yes, you did.

You know if anybody handed me a fucking NDA, I would literally tell them to

shove it up their...

I'm not saying you signed it. I'm not saying that. But you said I was lying

about it when you brought it up at Katie's bridal party. Yes, I'm saying it

looks like you could be lying. Of course. Well, Jen had told me that

everything's... I heard. I heard. Let me ask you this. Because of everything

you've heard and made up in your head, you really f***ed with my life a lot.

me ask you this. So stop. Let me ask you this.

Stop.

Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop.

Let me ask you a question. You're doing a lot of things that I don't like.

Lala.

Is the true reason you were handing out NDAs because your boyfriend didn't want

your relationship with him exposed? It seems like if you're handing out NDAs,

that would have, there would be a link.

I have NDAs to protect my life off of this show.

Okay? Okay. I'm no longer a part of this show.

But we all do, and I don't mean this as an insult, but who are you that everyone

is trying to print this material about you that you need to be handing out

This is coming from your boyfriend.

No, leave him out of this. He has nothing to do with it. Stop even talking

him.

Goddamn. It's not like you're Cate Blanchett or something.

So, Lala, after withdrawing from your friend, you decided to withdraw from

and Sir and everything else. Why?

Because I was just becoming an unhealthy individual. I was hammered all day,

every day. I was just not in a good headspace.

You know, human beings can only take so much until it's like, you know what, I

can't do it anymore.

Why did you encourage her to stay?

Because I think you should have the courage of her convictions.

And I think she's stronger than she knows she is. And she's so used to

back to mommy.

That's not a way to grow up.

Lala, you're not working it, sir. Is this really goodbye to this group?

Nah. It's really weird being here right now. First and foremost, I have done a

lot of slamming to every single person up here, so I just want to let y 'all

know that for that, I'm sorry for.

Thank you.

I have to give you a moment. You know, it's really hard to come into this group

and try to find where you fit in.

I will say one place where you went wrong, I think in the very beginning,

came in with a hard sell with yourself. I'm crazy. You don't want to mess with

me. You just oversold yourself in the beginning a little bit. I wish I would

have just gotten to know this person more because you seem awesome.

No, I definitely came into the situation because I had heard so many things that

were being said about me before I started. So when you walk in somewhere

your dukes already up, it's like, oh, this is going to go bad very quickly.

Well, good luck with whatever's next. Thank you so much. I appreciate it. And

hopefully we'll see you around.

Yes, definitely.

We'll be back after this.

Coming up.

Think that you shouldn't call girls the B word? I'm working on it, yeah.

Yeah, well, work harder.

We are back with the

Vanderpump Rules reunion. I'm Andy Cohen. I want to talk about the unfairly

couple to my right, Tom and Ariana. Thank you.

I think we saw the two of you get in the biggest fight ever over Ariana's

cocktail book when Tom tried to sidle in on him.

Everybody came up to me and they're like, why is Ariana doing a cocktail

and not you?

Yes. You're not going to be the face and you're not going to take attention away

from me.

Don't roll your eyes, you little bitch.

Why did that irritate you so much?

It irritated me because I had for months, like, already been working with

someone on it, and I had already done this huge proposal, gotten it

by an agency.

I just felt like, well, you can't just, like, jump in now.

But I will say, I kept giving you ideas.

I came up with your mission statement. You were very persistent.

At the end of the day, we are doing the book together.

Oh, you are?

Yeah.

That's like them getting married.

It's been kind of sad to see you Brush off Sandoval's persistent hints at

marriage. You're clearly absolutely crazy about each other.

Why not make him happy by letting him give you a big, fat ring?

I guess I just don't see the point. And I feel like every time someone asks

me about it, I get more and more frustrated because I feel like it's my

actually do, too.

And I will do what I want. The thing about it is I've never really been with

somebody where I...

Like, that thought came into my mind. I was like, I'm never getting married. I'm

never getting married. You never thought that about Kristen?

No. Sorry.

Did you guys ever talk about it? You were together a long time. I don't think

so. Yes, you did. Y 'all did? Yeah, a little bit.

Like, in the first couple of years when you're like, I'll, like.

You know what I mean.

Conversely, Brittany, you are a major marriage proponent. You've been planning

your wedding since you were a little girl. Yes, I know exactly what I want it

look like. I know, I know, I know. We're going to go to Denny's 100%. What's

your reaction to their point of view?

Just me personally. I know I want to have kids. I know I want to have a

I want to have that foundation.

And that's just something I've always wanted.

So it's different.

Stassi, do you...

Want to get married, or do you understand Ariana's hesitation?

If you would have asked me this six years ago, like when Katie and I were

Pinteresting weddings 24 -7, I would have had a completely different answer.

I come from a family where they, like, marry for sport and divorce for sport.

How many times has your dad been married?

They've both been married three times going on. My dad just proposed to his

fourth.

If you're not at least slightly weary of the institution of marriage, I don't

think you're doing enough critical thinking.

Like, I'm so happily married, but, like, you should be a little weary of it,

right? No, I hope that it works out. That would be really nice, but I don't

know. Okay, I want to talk about Kristen's comedy show.

Jack, at what point did you realize that Kristen was standing in front of that

audience

picture of your dick? About 15 seconds.

That's a long time.

Happy birthday, Kristen!

Come on, shut up. Where did you get this?

My ex -boyfriend.

Oh my god, you're so bad!

Oh my god, it better not be. My poor girlfriend, who's just brand new to the

group.

who's just kind of coming to the show. Jack, you didn't care that it hurt her

feelings. You cared that she got mad.

I cared that it hurt her feelings. No, I cared that it hurt her feelings. If you

cared that it hurt her feelings, then you wouldn't have done it. Yeah, she

promised me it's never going to happen again.

And if I ever say it again, I'm probably going to mad her. Well, Brittany is in

a group with a bunch of lunatics.

I love everybody, and that's what's so hard about this.

Lisa, tacky even by Kristen's standards?

Yeah, really tacky, really thoughtless, really hurtful. That was not the show

that Britney's mom was at. No. Okay. I just want to make sure that your mom has

now not seen a picture of Jackson. No, but, I mean, she knows now that that

happened, too.

Right. Well, speaking of...

Mm -hmm.

We got to meet Sherry when she came in from Kentucky.

Mm -hmm. Why would you bring your mom to a roast of Jack?

I knew things were going to go bad, but she had just gotten there, and I didn't

want to leave my mom. I mean, I miss my mom more than anybody.

Lisa, are you surprised that Brittany's mom made it through the entire worst?

Yeah, absolutely.

I mean, I was horrified. You had met Brittany's mom at the shower, and you

her if she was sure she wanted Jax to marry Brittany.

I like him, but for her to marry him, I want to wish you luck with that.

She's so wholesome, and he's the complete opposite.

I just thought that if she was my daughter, I probably wouldn't be that

about it.

I mean, I don't want to sound flip, but you've lied, cheated, and stolen.

Were you surprised that Brittany's mom seemed most upset that you've kissed a

guy? I kiss the guy about as much as these two kiss every day.

Ew,

ew!

Does that mean that you guys have to do it enough times?

No, man. No more. No more.

See, I mean, it's like, it's a joke and it's funny and all, but you guys are

making it out to be like the thing when you guys do it every damn day. But back

to the question. Whatever. Were you surprised that it became an issue?

Yeah, if I was in her shoes, I probably would have went after the cheating and

the drugs and all that.

What made you storm out, though, of the apartment?

You either take my word for it or you don't. There's no need to have attitude.

I'm going to go.

I probably should have just kind of went into my room for a minute and then came

back out. Because I do. I have a short fuse. Everybody knows that. I don't, you

know, I shoot first, ask later. I thought it was inappropriate, though,

to grill you on your sexual path.

It's her daughter. She's kind of like, okay, listen. Yeah, this is where I will

get very defensive.

I think any mother would be curious. Yes, but it's a little bit different of

place. Everyone would be curious if their future son -in -law is bisexual,

that was the information. Now I'm bisexual?

I'm not saying that.

She's saying that if you were.

Brittany, your mom took a lot of heat on social media for zoning in on Jack's

questionable.

Yeah, that's something that I will defend no matter what. All of you guys

met my mom now, and she is not homophobic whatsoever.

That was one of the hardest times that I've had doing this show, was the people

attacking my mom, who is the most amazing woman I have ever met in my

life. She was talking about what she heard at the roast. It was brought up by

you, probably, at the roast. No, Schwartz, yeah. So she wanted to know.

You know, there's many rumors floating around about Jax having...

A homosexual affair.

As a young model in Miami.

It's only gay if you like it. Listen, those bills, they're not going to pay

themselves. I have to say, as a gay guy watching that, I understood why she

would be interested in a possible son -in -law's sexuality.

That's why I'm defending her on that. I'm like, listen, in her defense, you

to understand where she's from. It's a very different world where she lives,

okay? It's almost, I'm not saying it's a different country, but it's

extremely...

Well, Jax, we actually followed you to Kentucky as you tried to make it as a

farm boy and convince Brittany's family you were good enough for their daughter.

Okay, good luck with that.

Take a look at Vanderpump Rules, Jax and Brittany take Kentucky.

Oh, man.

Oh.

Farmer Jax. You should capture this moment.

Oh, my gosh, look at the friends.

Wait a minute.

Oh, what is that?

Deer pit?

Do you think he's the one?

Oh, yeah. I can't imagine not being with him. When you're getting married, son.

We're heading in the right direction.

You've been in the right direction for almost two years.

I want to get married. I want to get married soon.

I like that plan. If you want to make Brittany happy, make her happy right

there.

I can see myself getting bored really easily here.

White trash.

Be gone. I'm her best friend, Jack.

You're an old man and you need to act your age. You don't mind taking money

this old man?

Your arrogance is your downfall.

That guy is trying to control you.

You can't even accept my friends or my family. Can I talk? Can I talk? You're

delusional. I didn't want the last day to be like this.

to add a little maturity to this group.

Stassi's little brother, Nikolai, is here.

Hey, Nikolai. Hi.

So good to see you. You're so brave.

You are. Hey, Nikolai, how old are you? I'm 12.

What grade are you in? I'm in sixth grade.

Excellent. We first met you on the show many years ago when Stassi was dating

Jack. What did you think of Stassi and Jax as a couple?

I mean, they were good at first, but then it just went all wrong.

What I'm doing is not working. Maybe you can help.

Here's the deal.

You always cannot be shy of girls. She's just a human, not like a wolf or a

snake. Well, Stassi can be like a wolf sometimes.

He can't. You just have to listen to that advice.

I will. I'm going to take it to heart, smart little man.

I'm a little scared of you.

I tried.

I tried the best I could, but he just wouldn't listen.

Well, Stassi, this season we saw you go through a rough breakup with Patrick.

How long were you together, and why did you break up?

Three years we were together.

Honestly, a lot of reasons. Did he ever, like, knock the show or, like, you

being on it or, like, discourage you from being on it? In the beginning,

all the time. And then when I moved back... Was that part of the reason that

left the show? I think, yeah.

I don't like admitting that because it makes me feel, like, really weak. But

then he became supportive of me doing it and supportive of everything else, but

it still didn't work out. Nikolai, were you sad when Stassi and Patrick broke

up? Yeah, because I thought it was good.

I thought she was going to stick with him, but I guess not. Not to be mean,

Stassi, just so you know, I feel like she made Patrick.

to only think about her, to give everything she wants.

Stassi, just so you know, you can't get everything you want in life.

I've seen you do that numerous times.

Okay, shut up. And maybe this is why you broke up with three boyfriends.

Nikolai, I think in this situation, though, she just clearly said that he

pressured her a lot about the show in the beginning. If he did, that's really

fucked up. Watch your language in front of the child.

Dossie, your little brother had very wise words when you two broke up. Yeah,

know, I just don't take him seriously until I see it on TV.

Is that true?

Like, we have these conversations all the time, but I'm like, what do you

I need you to just, like, be supportive, because I feel like I'm losing it.

Life's tough, man.

Especially in your 20s.

You do seem very...

wise beyond your years. Where do you think that comes from?

It just comes in my head. I learn it and then I just... Sex and the City.

You love Sex and the City?

I used to, though.

Wow.

What's the weirdest thing you can tell us about Stassi?

Oh, yes. Oh, gosh.

I don't want to mention it.

It's safe here. You're in the trust tree.

Don't be mad at me.

I walked in your door one time. Oh, God.

And I saw your boobies.

And then you turn around and you made the strangest face in the world.

It was like, it was just cringeworthy.

That is the proper response for your sister to have. Was this before or after

her breast was out? After my breast reduction.

Before. Oh, it was before he said that. No, then it was intense.

Nikolai, what do you love about your sister?

I love that she sticks up for herself because some people here don't. She

doesn't take any crap from anyone. And yeah, she cares about other people. So I

like that.

Nikolai, we love watching the advice that you give to Stassi on the show.

Before you leave, leave everybody with a piece of advice, okay?

Let's start with... Um, Tom Schwartz, your buddy.

Hi. Hey, bud.

Well... You can let me have it. Okay. Don't hold back.

Well, you gotta let me talk. Oh, sorry.

I think that you shouldn't call girls the B word.

Yeah, I know.

Just like you called them to.

I'm working on it, yeah.

Yeah, well, work harder.

What about his wife, Katie?

Um, lower it down on the drinking.

So you don't fight with people, and maybe you can have more friends.

Fair enough.

Okay. What about Jack?

You are just going to be a drunk guy, sitting in the lot, only thinking about

having sex with girls.

Amen to that.

I'm beginning to see how he's Stassi's little brother.

Yeah. Any advice for Ariana?

Yeah, think about other people because then you're gonna have no friends and

you're lucky to have Sheena right now What about for Sheena?

There's no picking a side.

There's no I'm trying to tell everyone I'm just trying to be friends with

everyone Well, then maybe all of you guys should start agreeing What about

Brittany There's no problem with her

I love you, Nikolai.

I know you don't know her, but anything for Lisa Vanderpump?

Keep it up in the business, you know? I mean, I would like to offer you a job.

Maybe you could be my personal advisor.

Nikolai, any advice for me before I let you go? No. I don't know anything that's

bad about you.

Let's keep it that way.

Thanks so much, Nikolai. It was a pleasure to have you with us.

Good job.

Hopefully we'll see you again.

Yeah. Okay.

We'll be right back.

Up next, do you care about Dotsie's feelings?

I didn't believe her for one second. That's why she can manipulate people

and time again.

I want to talk about the event leading up to Katie's wedding.

Kristen, you were so excited to throw a bridal shower for your best friend, but

Sheena, it seemed like the planning made you unhappy.

Well, I wasn't really included in the initial planning. When we were in

I found out there was a whole group chat that I wasn't a part of where they were

talking about throwing it on a yacht and doing all these extravagant, expensive

things. You felt excluded. I decided how I spend my money.

I wanted to be a part of it, too. I think it was just something we just

to help. Yeah, and I think it was just, it was unfair that it was decided the

three of us would just split it three ways and no one else has to pitch in.

you didn't have to pay as much. I did. I ended up paying.

I know. I'm just saying. You don't have to. Then don't say I didn't contribute

because I did. I spent $100.

I didn't say you didn't contribute.

You were just saying. Oh, my God. Okay.

Lisa, where did you find a blow -up doll named Katie?

I heard there was this lady.

Her name was Casey.

blow -up doll would just be perfect.

And I walked into this shop. And I have to be careful. I mean, I'm walking into

some, you know, grotty old sex shop. I said, you don't have.

And I'm in there.

And I'm like, do you have any blow -up dolls? So they said, well, we've got

one called Katie.

Katie! I literally had a fit. Did you inflate it and consummate your

relationship? Well, first of all, thank you for getting the one with the tight,

realistic ass, because I really appreciate that. That was very good.

Sorry. You can't read.

It says on the box. You blush every time you read it. Have you consummated your

relationship? We haven't. You haven't checked at all? I tried to blow it up,

remember, we couldn't get it. We had a malfunction.

What the?

No. Come on. I'm blowing it up as, like, a gag. I'm glad I went in and have

your, like, pants around your ankles while you're doing that.

We got it up when she hung out on the couch for a little while, but she

got deflated. Oh!

Okay. Katie, how generous was it of Pandora to give you a spa day in her

My God.

No, Pandora is one of the most generous people, and she's such a... Master host.

I wonder where she gets that. I know, exactly.

Exactly.

Sheena, you were on a mission to broker peace between Ariana and Stassi.

Katie, that seemed to make you furious with Sheena.

I don't know how it escalated into, like, all of a sudden me and Sheena

fighting. You're drunk texting me all of these insults. When you drink too much,

that's the issue.

Sheena, you're sitting there acting like you're perfect.

A lot of people feel that you're fake a lot of times.

And why the f*** are you friends with me if I'm fake? I have said I'm sorry. It

was taggy. It was claseless. I'm sorry.

Calm down.

No! God!

When you said for like the 20th time, there's a reflection of like, well, when

you drink, Katie, it's like, it's always like you got to just throw back to this

convenient narrative to take the pressure off of you and deflect from

There was no pressure on me. You said that I was fake and you just said a few

things that were very hurtful. And I just hit my breaking point. When you

you're a lot meaner to me than when you're sober.

Tina, come on.

I asked him a question.

Everyone said that, Katie.

Everyone has said it. Every single person in here has made a comment about

drinking. That is.

Sheena, that is really about... I don't think you understand the difference

between an alcoholic and having a drinking problem. She doesn't have a

problem. A drinking problem is when somebody uses alcohol and it negatively

affects their life and it becomes a problem. It was a problem in your

relationship. It's been a problem in your friendships.

Pretty much everyone here, I think, would agree at some point your drinking

been a problem.

My own boyfriend is picking up for the whore in there.

You've gotten angry like Tequila Katie again. The only reason I'm angry is

because of your...

You want to look like an asshole idiot, you can continue defending.

Are you drunk?

I cannot believe you're doing this to me right now.

I've never once called you an alcoholic. That is a totally different thing.

That's fair. But I don't have a problem.

OK.

Doctor, you used to be the girl at SUR that everybody wanted to be friends

How did it feel when Ariana said she didn't give a about you?

When you say it like that, it's funny. But, like, at the time, it wasn't. Then

don't understand what you're doing. Because I care about Katie.

I don't give a about you.

If everybody could just not come up to me and start a fight with me, then maybe

I wouldn't have to tell you that I don't give a about you.

Ariana has over and over again hurt my feelings. I don't know why she doesn't

like me.

I mean, she said that I'm annoying.

So, like, I guess that's it.

Ariana, do you care about Stassi's feelings?

I didn't believe her for one second.

Do you manipulate people time and time again?

You didn't manipulate Jack over and over again. She didn't go to lunch with you

and manipulate James. I manipulated James.

I took it on myself.

That's the cherry on top to a sundae that you've created yourself.

You guys continue to put me in a position where you ask me questions

you're not going to like the answer, I give you an honest answer, and then I'm

the asshole.

Coming up. You just think the worst of me in every single situation. You keep

giving me opportunities, Stassi.

You guys continue to put me in a position where you ask me questions, I

an honest answer, and then I'm the asshole.

You guys hold this grudge against her that she never did to you for a person

that she was years ago.

A person that I saw being friends with at some point. But she is not that

person. That was, like, 2012 Stassi. She doesn't really have that power. It's

the same person. There's no 2012 Stassi and 2016 Stassi. I'm not even given an

opportunity to get to know who she is today, and you just write her off and

assume things about her. You don't. You don't. It's really, you know what? I

told you at Pandora's house that I was open to getting to know you, and I've

been trying to be open, and then I watched our conversation at the wedding,

you said, I've been waiting to crack her.

It's weird. I don't know why I'm doing this right now.

It's okay to be emotional and don't feel sad about feeling sad.

I have wanted to crack her for so long.

There it is. There's the exact person I knew you were. I knew you were

manipulating me. Really? It's a joke.

Seriously? You can just be joking all the time. You just think the worst of me

in every single situation. You keep giving me opportunities, Stassi. Saying

finally cracked her isn't mean.

It's really manipulative.

No, it's not.

and talk to her and that you felt this way. If anyone's manipulating people,

it's you two because I try and have... Are you kidding me?

She was just kidding.

Then maybe I just don't want to be friends with somebody who kids that way.

that okay? That's fine. And I just not... I don't trust you. So these jokes

aren't funny.

Then we don't need to... And that's fine.

I have tried.

I have tried. I thought it was bullshit. I thought it was another opportunity

for you to be the victim so that you have power over everyone else in the

I'm never the victim. Are you...

Are you kidding me? I'm always the bully.

Oh, my God. If I'm the victim or the bully, I always want people to be

apologizing or working their way up to, like, gain your approval. No matter

what, you guys will never trust me. You'll never like me.

That's on you.

Next week, it's part three of the Vanderpump Rules reunion.

I feel like Kristen may sneak in with an engagement. I don't know.

I might be able to, like, trick him into it. Hey, me and Swartz and you and

James, we'll go on a double date. Yeah, we'll double up.

I hear yelling in the hallway, and I see two guys fighting about looking like

Sia. You guys are solely responsible for all of our arguments.

I wasn't trying to be a tyrant or a bridegroom. I just really wanted

Not once are you guys telling Katie that she needs to do anything.

Mike Shea is going to be joining us. I don't want to see him. I'm scared for

to be around all of us.

I'm too sober for this.

Shea, when you read that Sheena has a new boyfriend, what does that do to your

heart? I don't know who he is. I don't care to know. You do. You follow him on

Instagram.

The guy you're dating?

I can't even look at you right now.

To see more of Vanderpump Rules, go to bravotv .com.

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.