Original subtitles

(Dramatic classical music)

(Blood squelches)

(Gasps)

(Heavy thump, watermelon squashes loudly)

Jesus. Holy shit.

Hello, Susan.

(Music concludes)

Is everything cool here?

Ma Baker.

I'm Susan's-what would you call me?

Your step grandmother? Yeah, sort of.

But she's like the daughter I never had.

Aww. (Ma Baker laughs)

I'm 82, you know. 82? Wow.

You travelled to Canada all by yourself? Well...

(Laughs): I didn't walk it. (Suze laughs nervously)

I wouldn't say no to a cup of tea.

I have me angina tablets to take.

Well, I think we can handle a cup of tea.

And a gin and tonic. All right.

Jesus, the arse on it.

I'd be all over him like a seagull on vomit.

(Firmly): What are you doing here? Where's Sheryl?

What do you want with her? There was money in that van.

There was 50 grand in it. Fifty?

(Laughs): I think you're in shock. (Distorted music)

Or is the grief hitting you?

Grief, is it?

Yeah. Oh, poor Deryl.

The best part of that child ran down the inside of me leg.

Thanks for that image in my head.

Where's the money, Suze? Or I'll go to the police.

Oh, and what would you tell them? I'll tell them the truth, Susan.

That your mother murdered my son. (Music intensifies)

(Music turns mystical and fades)

SARE: Where did Sheryl go? BARBARA: I put her in a taxi.

KRISTEN: She wanted to listen to... I told her to fly.

But when is it my time? (Kristen breathes deeply)

When is it Barbara time? Oh, you know, it it can happen now.

Soon. Yes, very soon.

Let's just focus on taking one step at a time.

Putting one foot in front of the other.

You know you get very jowly...

(Sighs) when you're pregnant.

You're doing good. Thank you.

All right. Ooh, okay.

Okay. We got you.

Steve, your mom's hammered again. (People speaking and laughing)

SARE: Hey? Hey... Sare. Sare, look at this. Look.

This is Ma Baker.

Now, she is Suze's step grandmother. Surprise!

Okay, this one's not on me. CHARLES: It's marvelous.

We have to call the caterer, set a new place for the wedding.

I don't want to be a burden. You won't in the slightest.

There's no space. She's an old woman.

I'm 82! Wow!

Suze, can you help me in the car?

Yeah, okay.

(Mid tempo inquisitive drums)

Sisters...

(Drums end) Okay, wait. So she's Deryl's mother?

What is she doing here? Well, she's lonely. She's grieving.

Fine. Long story short, turns out

Deryl wasn't an ordinary ice cream man.

You mean, like, he had special powers?

No, I mean the ice cream thing was a front

for her payday loan business.

Wait, what? You know, payday loans?

They lend to desperate people, short term, for high interest.

Yeah, no, I know that.

What is she doing here? (Sighs)

There was money in the ice cream van.

We found it after Deryl's accident.

About 50 grand. She wants it back.

So? Just give it to her. No way.

Sheryl's earned that for what he put her through.

You're right. That's Sheryl's money.

She's gotta go. Hang on, it's not that simple.

She won't leave without seeing Sheryl. Okay, okay.

Well, let's just say we're bringing her to Sheryl

and take her to the airport instead.

Hang on. Sheryl's not here?

High cholesterol, osteoarthritis...

Yup, me too. Same. Diabetes, high blood pressure,

low blood pressure.

Did I mention glaucoma? (Whimsical drums)

CHARLES: No, not yet. I'm a martyr to me eyes.

Okay, we are gonna take you to Sheryl.

Oh! (Chuckles) Yeah, she'll be so happy to see you.

(Whimsical drums continue)

(Gentle chatter; music plays quietly inside)

JIMMY: Sheryl, love! I'm over here. (She sighs)

Jimmy, what in the name of God are you doing here?

You said to meet here. I don't mean here.

I mean in Canada. My daughter's getting married.

God, I wish I'd not opened my big mouth.

I should have known you'd pull some stupid stunt.

You're looking well.

Oh, for God's sake, Jimmy.

I'm entitled to walk my daughter down the aisle.

You are not entitled. Not if she doesn't want you there.

Has she said that? Yes, she has.

I don't know what happened between you.

It's in the past. Look at me.

I'm sober now.

Oh, change the record, Jimmy. For good this time.

If I could just talk to her... Take my advice.

Get on the next plane home. Nobody wants you here.

Let me let me at least buy you a drink first. Come on.

God's sake.

What'll you have? I'm buying.

Come on.

Bartender, glass of red wine for the lady.

SUZE: How'd you find us?

Wedding invitation was in the ice cream van.

The address was in it for the RSVP.

I don't think much of it.

Of what? Of Canada.

You've only been here an hour. I've seen enough.

You may keep it.

Oh, what milk did that lad put in me tea? Almond milk.

Oh, I've got indigestion from it.

I tell you, the world is going to hell fast.

If we're going around milking almonds now-Ooh!

Oh, I wish the flames of hell would warm me now.

(Soft, off putting music)

Oh, no wonder no one fought for this country.

Here's me coat, now shut up. Who would want to live here?

Half of America. Oh, here.

For God's sake. Here. Now, come on, get in.

MA BAKER: Oh, don't rush me. Don't rush me.

SUZE: Come on. Don't push me!

SUZE: Why is that red light on? SARE: Shit.

You might need to pull over. We're on the motorway.

(Soft intriguing music) (Wheels squeal)

If you're thinking of driving me to the airport, I'd think again.

You know that money that you claim was in the van?

Leave it. No, no.

I've been thinking about your legal position.

Did Deryl leave a will? No point. His only assets were liquid.

Well, then legally, I'm afraid you're in a bit of a bind.

A bind, is it? Any money in his possession is part of his estate.

In the absence of a will, the law says it goes to the next of kin.

I'm his mother.

Under European law, the rights of a spouse supersede

those of a parent. Oh... Brains and beauty. Ha!

Well, I did two years in probate law, so...

You better take me to the airport, so... (Uneasy music)

Looks like I've had a wasted journey... Mhm.

If that's the law.

Except where I come from, there's two kinds of law.

There's one practiced by nice speaking people

like you in wigs and fancy gowns.

And there's the law that says if you take something

that belongs to me,

I'm going to get a broken bottle and perform a tracheotomy on you.

(Music ends)

Anyone fancy a Murray Mint?

We're grand for Murray Mints. (Inquisitive music)

I need the Jacks.

(Whispers): What? It means the toilet.

(Music fades) JIMMY: How's Suze?

(Rock music plays faintly) You know yourself. Suzie is Suzie.

No doubt about that.

I'd have loving for her to be settled by now.

But what man in his right mind

is looking for a woman in her 40s?

It's like shopping for a turkey at 5.00 on Christmas Eve.

All the birds left out are damaged.

I meant what I said.

You look great. Oh, will you go away out of that?

Don't think it's too much, do you? With the sunglasses?

You look like Jackie O. Stop.

Got them on the plane. There was an article in Suzie's magazine

about women who blossomed in widowhood.

Elizabeth Taylor, Priscilla Presley, Courtney Love.

All in the ha'penny place compared to you.

"Death becomes her:

Thirty women who went from burial plot to smoking hot."

(He chuckles)

Some people are terribly clever, aren't they, Jimmy?

We had some happy times, didn't we? I'm sure we must have done.

Though I'd have to rack my brains. (Jimmy chuckles)

Holy shit, this country. God. (Objects clink and clatter)

Manky Canadian Jacks. (Soft, off putting music)

Ugh!

Now, let's see what you're up to.

Maybe I should show her some pictures of Tofino.

Nobody hates Canada. Jesus.

Stay focused. Right, sorry. Is she dangerous?

You don't get by in her job without

knowing how to deliver an ultimatum.

MA BAKER: Sixty nine, sixty nine.

Ah.

Nineteen sixteen. (Whispers): Focus.

(Determined music) (She sighs)

We should go to the cops. No. No cops.

She threatened your mother. I don't want the cops involved.

What are you not telling me?

Okay, fine. Look.

You're gonna laugh at this. I'm wondering, will I?

She has got it into her head that Sheryl murdered Deryl.

Ah! Sheryl? Murdered Deryl? It's madness.

She's fucking loop the loop.

(Determined music continues)

Aha!

SUZE (On video): Deryl? DERYL: What?

SUZE: Where the fuck are you?

DERYL: What d'you want? (Gasps, squished)

Oh, God.

(music becomes more urgent)

I'm just thinking out loud. Go on.

Why don't we or could we just drive her out into the woods?

Okay. And then what? Maybe a bear might eat her.

A bear? You've got bears here?

This isn't a dystopian land of the future

where we feed our enemies to the animals.

This is Toronto. I said I was just thinking out loud.

I am getting married in two days.

I didn't invite her here. All right?

(Inquisitive determined music)

(Music concludes)

Okay. You need to go back to Ireland.

I'll go home gladly when I've got what I came for.

Where the fuck is my phone?

You must be batshit crazy if you think Sheryl murdered your son.

If anything, he nearly killed her. Sheryl didn't kill my son.

She wouldn't be capable. Susan killed him.

What?

SUZE: Deryl! DERYL: What?

Where the fuck are you? What'd you want?

SUZE: Deryl? (Sare gasps)

What kind of a gobshite has 1, 2, 3, 4 as a pin code?

It was an accident.

I went out. He was under the van. I didn't fucking know.

You take me to Sheryl right now.

Will you look at your man? He's the head off ya, Jimmy.

JIMMY: No, go away. (Man sings)

The head off ya.

I think you were the first man in Ireland to wear leather trousers.

Remember? You thought you'd be a rock star.

And what I wasn't gonna do! Break America,

and then the world.

"A love that's mine,

A love divine."

I wrote that song for you.

Sure. You told five or six girls the same.

You're the only one I wasn't lying to.

They still throw knickers at you? Still happens the odd time.

Just as you get older, the knickers get bigger.

(She laughs) Last time

I thought a wee person was parachuting onto the stage.

(Both laugh)

Fat chance now. The state of you.

I'd forgotten you used to be funny.

Will you cop on to yourself, Jimmy.

(Rock song plays in background)

Fancy a bop?

Sure it's worth us together all the way across the Atlantic.

Come on.

(She chuckles)

Jesus, you could drive a coach and six horses through there.

Do you remember what Sister Dolores always used to say?

"Leave enough room between you

BOTH: for the Holy Spirit."

What?

(Tense drums)

Sare, talk to me. Let's just find Sheryl.

Jesus. I'm really sorry I told you.

You didn't tell me. She did. Just watch the whole video.

Of a man having his head crushed by an ice cream van?

No, thank you. You'll see it was an accident.

I wonder what the police believe it was an accident

when they find the money.

Wherever Sheryl stashed it.

Where the bloody hell is she anyway?

Look, we've been to, what, six bars now and still no sign of her.

Just give me my phone and I'll ring her. Give you your phone?

Yeah. With the video on it?

I'll give it straight back.

You must think I'm as green as some cabbage looking.

Come on, let's just keep going. No.

No more bars. Youse have the legs walked off of me.

(Pop music plays in background)

I'm going to sit here.

You two can find Sheryl and bring her to me.

Fuck.

(Gentle rock song plays in the bar)

JIMMY: What'd you think? Can we make a go of it again?

You have a lot of making up to do.

You caused so much damage. I-I have so many regrets.

But I've only one big one.

What is it, Jimmy?

I should have gone to the States when I could.

I could have made it to the big time.

That's your biggest regret? I had a great song.

I could have had a completely different life.

Don't regret the misery you put me and Suzie through?

We're all responsible for our happiness.

Oh, with that shite now?

The first thing you learn in the program.

Oh, your biggest problem was never the drink, Jimmy.

You were a selfish git.

And you're still a selfish git.

Just a sober one. Well, you're no angel.

Am I to believe you getting pregnant

with Suze was an accident?

You did it to stop me from going to the States.

To lock me down.

Now, are you going to tell me where that wedding is?

No, I am not. I'll find out meself.

It's easy done. She told him you were dead, Jimmy.

She told her in laws that her father was dead.

You're lying. Sure, wasn't she the one that came looking for me?

She came looking for her father. And she found you.

A pathetic husk of a man.

Oh, for once in your life, Jimmy,

will you do the right thing? Will you walk away?

(She pants): Okay.

(She breathes shakily)

(She laughs to herself): Oh, and that song of yours?

You didn't write it.

Johnny Cash wrote it. What are you on about?

"A love that's mine, a love divine."

People used to be laughing at you.

"Have you heard about the Yank? He thinks he wrote

'I Walk the line'".

(She continues to laugh to herself)

(Intriguing drums)

(Gentle traffic hum)

SUZE: Fuck. Where is she?

(Drums end) (Glasses clink; gentle chatter)

(Phone buzzes) Oh, it's her.

Mam, it's me. SHERYL: Oh, I'm sorry, Suzie.

I tried your phone,

but it was just that robot lady saying to leave a message.

SUZE: Ma Baker's here.

(Tense distorted music) She knows about the money.

Right.

(Sighs): Where are you? We're in a pub. We were looking for you.

Bring her back to the house.

(Breathes shakily)

(Intriguing music)

(Door squeals open) (Music ends)

Mam! We'll talk in here.

You seem to be bearing up well, Sheryl.

It comes in waves, I suppose, does it? The grief?

You can have the money. What?

I buried it in the garden.

I dug a hole next to Princess.

Who's Princess? SHERYL: My dog.

I got her the week Diana died.

That's your money. You earned it from what he put you through.

SHERYL: Suzie,

what would I do with 50,000 Euro?

I'd never get a day's happiness from it.

I killed Deryl, Mam. (Emotional music)

It was an accident.

That day

I found you on the floor. I went to find him.

I opened the ice cream van and he wasn't in there,

and I slammed the door.

I didn't know he was underneath it until I heard his head explode.

On the other side I saw his little

legs sticking out like the Wicked Witch of the West.

Except in cowboy boots.

(Shirley sighs)

I knew all of that. (Music turns tender)

Sure, I knew from your face the minute you came in.

I'm not sorry I did it.

He'd have killed you eventually. (Scoffs)

(Exhales heavily)

Now, there was one time that your son

told me to get him a beer from the fridge.

And I suppose I wasn't quick enough for his liking

because he broke two of my fingers.

Can't even begin to describe the pain to you.

He wouldn't let me go to the hospital.

He locked all the doors and the windows

and he poured all my painkillers down the toilet.

He said the memory of the pain was the only way

I'd learn my lesson.

Well, if you're quite finished,

you can take me to the airport now.

It'll be a relief to get out of this kip of a country.

Can I just say that Canada is like

50 million square kilometres in size

and you've seen this much?

I won't be recommending it to anyone, just so you know.

We'll survive. We should have fed her to the bears.

(Whimsical mid tempo drums stop momentarily)

I was getting married and everything was going great.

And then you show up and bring this rain of shit

down on my head.

You know you know what you are? Oh, what am I?

I can't fucking wait to hear this. You're toxic.

Ah! I'm toxic? Yeah.

You poison everything you touch. (Drums resume)

Every relationship you've ever had.

Every chance of happiness that's ever come your way.

You're like a...

Like a human oil spill. You're saying things you can't take back.

You made me an accessory to murder.

And then you lied about it.

Hey, hey, folks. What's going on? We heard yelling and screaming.

Is everything okay? Yeah, no, um. Everything's great.

Ma Baker was just going to the airport. CHARLES: No!

Ma's coming to the wedding.

I'm calling the caterer to set her up. She hates Canada.

Hates Canada? No one hates Canada.

Ma Baker. What's going on here?

She's sleeping.

Maybe she's still jet lagged.

Ma, what's going on?

(Dramatic note) Holy shit. She's dead.

(Note repeats) (Barbara gasps dramatically)

(Suze gasps) (Traditional Irish song plays)

♪ Well, in the merry month of May

♪ Now from me home I started

♪ Left the girls of Tuam

♪ Nearly broken hearted

♪ Saluted father dear, kissed me darling mother

♪ Drank a pint of beer me grief and tears to smother

♪ Then off to reap the corn and leave where I was born

♪ Cut a stout blackthorn to banish ghosts and goblins

♪ A brand new pair of brogues to rattle over the bogs

♪ And frighten all the dogs on the rocky road to Dublin... ♪