Original subtitles

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY ARTISAN HOME ENTERTAINMENT

♪♪ GO! ♪♪

[SINGING IN AFRICAN LANGUAGE]

HOTEL RIVE GAUCHE.

RIVE GAUCHE? TRèèS BIEN.

DATE-- DEMAINS C'EST LE 14 JUILLET.

CERTAINS DE L'AUTOROUE SONT FERMéE.

PRENDE UN MOMENT.

EXCUSEZ-MOI, LA MUSIQE NE DERANGE PAS?

JE PEUX LE MUSIQUE àà MARCH?

I DON'T SPEAK FRENCH.

AH, ENGLISH?

AMERICAN.

AH, THAT'S GOOD.

I SPEAK A LITTLE AMERICAN.

I ASKED IF YOU MIND THE RADIO--

MUSIC, YOU KNOW.

IT'S OK.

AH, SUPER COOL.

YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS?

I DON'T KNOW. DAYTIME?

ARE YOU IN TOWN FOR BUSINESS?

YEP.

IT'S A NICE HOTEL, YOUR HOTEL.

VERY BIG ROOMS.

DO YOU KNOW PARIS?

NOT REALLY.

I SPENT SOME TIME HERE A LONG TIME AGO

WHEN I WAS YOUNG.

OH.

THOSE WERE THE DAYS.

MARRIED?

SAY WHAT?

DO YOU HAVE A WIFE?

USED TO.

WHY?

WELL, IF YOU NEED A WIFE FOR THE NIGHT,

FOR BUSINESS--

OH.

I'LL GIVE YOU MY NUMBER.

SHE'S A VERY NICE GIRL.

FRENCH--LIKE WHEN YOU WERE VERY YOUNG.

THANKS.

JUST TELL ME. I'LL SET IT UP.

WHAT YOU LAUGHING AT?

LET MOISES SET IT UP.

AH, YOUR PACKAGE.

IT ARRIVED IN THE NIGHT LAST NIGHT

BEFORE THE LAST NIGHT.

UH, TELEPHONE FOR ANY ROOM SERVICE.

YOU HAVE THE TOILET HERE...

THE DOOR,

AND THE TELEVISION RIGHT HERE.

WITH THIS,

YOU CAN OPERATE IT ANYWHERE IN THE ROOM.

GREAT.

VOILàà.

OK.

WELL...

OH.

OK.

UM...

MMM.

UH...

OK. THERE YOU GO.

MERCI BEAUCOUP, MONSIEUR.

ALL RIGHT. THANKS.

OH, HEY! DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS?

WHAT? I'M SORRY.

TIME. TIME.

WHAT TIME IT IS.

OH, L'HEURE.

IL EST DIX NEUF HEURES CINQUANTE.

PRESQUE DIX NEUF HEURES CINQUANTE.

BON SOIR.

[WATER RUNNING]

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

[KNOCK KNOCK]

[KNOCK KNOCK]

JUST A MINUTE.

[KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK]

COMING.

BONJOUR.

BONJOUR.

COME ON IN.

WOW. VOUS AVEZ UNE BELLE CHAMBRE.

JE NE SUIS JAMAIS VENUE DANS CET HOTEL.

CE SERA 150 DE L'HEURE. 700 LA NUIT.

VOUS PAYEZ D'AVANCE.

PAS TROP BIZARRE, PAS DE--

HEY, HEY, HOLD ON.

I DON'T SPEAK FRENCH.

DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?

YES, I DO.

IT'S OK.

IT WILL BE 1,000 FRANCS FOR ALL NIGHT.

I DON'T DO WEIRD STUFF--

A CONDOM, AND YOU HAVE TO PAY IN ADVANCE.

WHAT KIND OF WEIRD STUFF DON'T YOU DO?

LIKE PEEING ON ME.

I CAN'T-- I CAN'T PEE?

NO.

WHAT DOES, UH,

WHAT'S 1,000 FRANCS TRANSLATE TO IN AMERICAN?

5-3...

AROUND 200 BUCKS.

THANK YOU.

OK.

BLOW JOB INCLUDED.

WE CAN DO IT NOW IF YOU WANT.

NO.

I WANT TO DRY OFF FIRST.

OK, BUT IT'S NOT NECESSARY.

200 BUCKS, AND I CAN'T PEE ON YOU, HUH?

NO!

JEEZ. WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

ZOE OR ZOEY, WHICHEVER YOU LIKE.

OH, YEAH?

MY NAME'S ZED.

THAT'S FUNNY. WE BOTH HAVE "Z" NAMES.

WHAT?

YOU CAN TAKE THOSE OFF.

THE PANTS.

IT'S EASIER WITHOUT, YOU KNOW?

I THINK I'D RATHER WATCH YOU

GET UNDRESSED FIRST.

OK.

HEY, HEY, HEY.

SLOWLY.

OK...

MR. AMERICA...

ZED.

THAT'S CAPTAIN AMERICA, BABY.

SLOW ENOUGH FOR YOU?

[DOOR CLANKS SHUT]

I'M COLD.

THERE.

ZED.

HMM?

MOISES TOLD ME YOU WERE IN TOWN FOR BUSINESS.

MM-HMM.

WHAT KIND OF BUSINESS?

WHY?

I DON'T KNOW. I'M JUST CURIOUS.

DO YOU ASK ALL YOUR CLIENTS QUESTIONS

ABOUT THEIR BUSINESS?

HMM.

NO.

JUST THE ONES I LIKE.

OH, SO YOU LIKE ME?

YEAH.

WHY?

BECAUSE YOU'RE A GOOD PERSON.

I RUN INTO SOME REAL CREEPS, YOU KNOW?

YEAH.

NOW, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT I'M A GOOD PERSON?

BODY LANGUAGE.

WE FIT TOGETHER.

WE "FEET" TOGETHER?

ALL MEN AND WOMEN FEET TOGETHER.

HELL, EVEN SOME MEN FEET TOGETHER.

YEAH, BUT YOU KNOW, WE CLICKED.

YOU MADE ME ORGASM.

DO YOU KNOW HOW OFTEN I ORGASM

WITH GUYS MOISES SETS ME UP WITH?

3 TIMES A WEEK?

NEVER.

THEY'RE ALWAYS FAT LIKE PIGS.

[SNORT]

FUCK ME, BABY.

[PANTING]

AND YOU MAKE ME FEEL SAFE.

THAT'S MAYBE MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE ORGASM.

YOU KNOW, IT MAY BE

THE INTEGRAL PART OF THE ORGASM.

I NEVER THOUGHT OF IT LIKE THAT.

WELL, THAT'S TRUE.

[MOVIE MUSIC PLAYS ON TELEVISION]

TURN OFF THE TV.

[CLICK]

SO I REALLY MEAN IT,

WHAT I'M TELLING YOU, ZED.

I LIKE YOU VERY MUCH.

I LIKE YOU, TOO.

HONEST?

MM-HMM.

WHY?

FOR THE SAME REASON?

ANY MAN CAN ORGASM, EVEN WITH HIS OWN HAND.

WELL, I LIKE YOU BECAUSE YOU--

YOU JUST WON'T STOP TALKING.

HA HA HA HA!

JUST KEEP TALKING.

HA HA HA HA!

YOU'RE OPEN, AND YOU'RE HONEST.

I DON'T KNOW.

YOU'RE DIFFERENT THAN A LOT OF THE PROSTITUTES

THAT I'VE BEEN WITH.

I'M NOT A PROSTITUTE!

OH, REALLY?

WELL, GREAT.

THEN CAN I HAVE MY 1,000 FRANCS BACK?

I'M A STUDENT.

OH.

I BECAME AN ESCORT TO PAY MY CLASSES.

OH.

IT'S MY CHOICE TO SLEEP WITH YOU.

I UNDERSTAND.

NO, YOU DON'T.

NO, NO, NO. I GET IT.

IT'S NOT EASY.

HEY, I DIDN'T SAY IT WAS...EASY.

IT'S MY CHOICE TO BE HERE.

OK.

OK.

WHAT KIND OF, UH...

STUDENT ARE YOU?

WHERE DO YOU GO TO SCHOOL?

LES BEAUX ART.

LES BEAUX ARTS.

WHAT'S THAT, ART SCHOOL?

YOU AN ARTIST?

WHAT KIND OF ART DO YOU STUDY?

NOT ANY OF THE OLD SHIT.

AH.

NO, AND I HAVE A DAY JOB, TOO,

3 TIMES A WEEK,

VERY BORING.

BUT ONE DAY,

THERE WILL BE ONLY MY ART.

WHAT ARE YOU, A PAINTER?

I DON'T PAINT.

I MAKE THINGS.

OBJECT.

NOT LIKE SCULPTURE.

LIKE LIFE.

WHAT I DO, I DO IT ONLY FOR THE OBJECTS.

I'D LIKE TO SEE ONE OF THEM SOMETIME.

WHAT?

SO YOU COULD SEE THE WORK OF A WHORE?

OH, GOD, LOOK,

I'M SORRY I CALLED YOU A PROSTITUTE, ALL RIGHT?

I DIDN'T KNOW THAT THERE WAS A DIFFERENCE.

THE DIFFERENCE IS,

A PROSTITUTE WOULD'VE LIED TO YOU ABOUT ORGASM.

I DIDN'T LIE.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

WHAT TIME IS IT?

I DON'T KNOW.

NIGHTTIME.

I'M GONNA TAKE A SHOWER.

[KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK]

I'M COMING!

JEEZ.

HEY!

HEY, ERIC!

YOU ARE A MADMAN.

WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?

I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO CALL.

OH, I SEE.

WELL, I INTERRUPT SOMETHING.

YOU'VE BEEN BUSY.

I ASKED THE HOTEL FOR A WAKE-UP CALL, BUT--

BUT NOW I'M HERE, SO LET'S GO.

WE HAVE A LOT TO TALK ABOUT.

WELL, THIS GIRL'S STILL HERE.

IS SHE YOUR GIRLFRIEND?

NO.

FUCK HER.

SHE'S A DISHRAG WHORE. KICK HER OUT.

I'M GONNA LET HER STAY THE NIGHT.

DON'T BE SILLY. IT'S DANGEROUS.

Zed: HEY!

DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, MAN.

DON'T WORRY.

AAH!

ZED!

DONNEZ MOI MES FRINGUES, PETIT CON!

GOD DAMN IT. LOOK AT MY HAND.

ZED!

MERDE.

JE VEUX MES VETEMENTS!

OH, SHIT. HER CLOTHES.

ZED!

NO!

ALLEZ VOUS FAIR ENCULER!

SO, TELL ME, WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO?

ERIC, I LIKED THAT GIRL.

YEAH, WELL, THEN WHY DIDN'T YOU STOP ME?

'CAUSE YOU WERE RUNNING AROUND

LIKE A FUCKING MANIAC.

YOUR WHOLE LIFE YOU'VE DONE NOTHING

BUT FUCK WHORES.

A GIRL LIKE THAT WILL GIVE YOU AIDS.

WHY DON'T YOU FIND A NICE GIRL IN THE SUBURBS?

BECAUSE WHEN YOU WANT TO GET OFF,

YOU DON'T WANT TO WAIT 3 MONTHS.

JUST USE YOUR HAND, LIKE ME.

HA HA HA!

SOMETIMES YOU JUST NEED

THE HONESTY AND SECURITY OF A WHORE.

HUH?

I DON'T UNDERSTAND. ANYWAY, IT'S TOO LATE.

LET'S GO MEET THE BOYS. COME ON.

I STINK. BETTER TAKE ANOTHER SHOWER.

NO. IN PARIS,

IT'S GOOD TO SMELL LIKE YOU'VE BEEN FUCKING.

IT WILL MAKE THEM RESPECT YOU.

JUST PUT ON A SHIRT AND SPORT COAT. COME ON.

HEY, HEY, HEY!

I'M GLAD YOU CAME. HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN?

11 YEARS.

11 YEARS. NO.

YEAH.

IT'S AMAZING, YOU KNOW,

HERE YOU ARE ONE DAY IN AMERICA, NOW HERE.

YEAH.

WELL, TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH,

THERE WASN'T A LOT HAPPENING FOR ME BACK IN THE STATES.

BUT IN PARIS,

YOUR OLD FRIEND ERIC HAS A JOB FOR YOU.

HOW COULD I RESIST YOUR INVITATION?

YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN STUPID TO.

WELL...

I'M NOT THAT STUPID.

NO.

NOT YET.

SO WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING

FOR THE LAST 11 YEARS?

WELL, AFTER SCHOOL,

I SPENT SOME TIME IN ALGERIA

STUDYING AFRICAN PHILOSOPHY,

AND THEN I BUMMED AROUND, YOU KNOW, FOR FUN.

FOR A WHILE I WORKED AT LE FIGARO,

THE NEWSPAPER.

DO YOU KNOW LE FIGARO?

YEAH.

WOW.

YEAH. WITH AN ASSUMED MASTER'S DEGREE--

HA HA HA!

AND LATELY, WE HAVE JUST BEEN BOMBING FASCISTS

HERE IN PARIS, YOU KNOW,

LIKE TERRORISTS.

YEAH.

IT'S FUN.

[HONKING HORN]

[HONK HONK]

WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING?

ASSHOLE!

[SINGING IN FRENCH]

LIKE IT?

A KITTY.

HEY, KITTY CAT.

WHAT'S GOING ON?

HELLO.

HUH?

IS THIS CAT DEAD?

I DON'T KNOW.

I THINK IT'S ASLEEP,

BUT IT'S BEEN THERE FOR DAYS.

OH, YEAH.

I GUESS IT IS DEAD. YEAH.

COME ON.

THE PEOPLE NEXT DOOR ARE ON HOLIDAY.

WE TOOK THEIR PHONE.

IF YOU WANT TO MAKE A LONG DISTANCE CALL, GO AHEAD.

COME ON.

WHERE DO YOU LIVE?

UP THERE.

WATCH OUT FOR STUFF.

JEEZ!

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYS]

HOW ARE YOU GUYS?

OK.

OLIVER IS FROM ENGLAND. CLAUDE.

RICARDO--QUEBEC, FRANçOIS--VIET.

JEAN--TOULOUSE.

ERIC.

THEY ALL KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

ALLEZ, ALLEZ.

CAN I GET YOU ANYTHING TO DRINK, ZED?

YEAH...A BEER?

THANKS.

ALLEZ. I MEA, COME HERE.

HERE. ICI.

[SCREECH]

EASY. EASY. DON'T SCARE HIM.

HE'S JUST TRYING TO CLAIM YOU.

LET ME INTRODUCE YOU PROPERLY.

THAT IS ENRIQUE.

HE LIKES TO BE CALLED CHIM CHIM,

BUT WE DON'T ALWAYS GET WHAT WE LIKE, DO WE?

[SCREECH]

ENRIQUE, TAIS-TOI!

ARRET.

I HATE MONKEYS.

YOU LIKE HASHISH?

OH, YEAH.

COME ON.

DON'T SIT NEXT TO THAT JUNKIE.

AH, OUI?

DANS LES CHEVEAUX!

BRAVO!

FUCK.

YOUR LITTLE SHIT MONKEY

PISSED ON MY BILLIE HOLIDAY ALBUMS.

NEXT TIME HE'S OUT THE DOOR, OK?

OK. OK.

ZED, COME HERE.

HA HA HA HA!

DON'T ASK ME WHERE WE GOT THIS, OK?

WHERE DID YOU GET THIS?

ON BASTILLE DAY, ALL THE BANKS ARE CLOSED

BUT THIS ONE, B.I.P.--

BANQUE INTERNATIONALE DE PARIS.

AND FOR BEING GREEDY CAPITALISTS,

PERHAPS THEY WILL REMAIN CLOSED NEXT BASTILLE DAY, HEY?

[BELCHES]

THIS IS THE ONLY ENTRANCE. GOOD.

WE WILL GO IN AND SHUT THE BANK DOWN.

NOW LOOK AT THIS.

AS YOU CAN SEE,

ONLY ONE PERSON CAN START THE ALARM.

HUH?

THE CONCIERGE AT THIS DESK.

WE'LL TAKE CARE OF HIM,

THEN WE CAN CLOSE THE BANK.

NO ONE WILL NOTICE, SINCE EVERY OTHER BANK WILL BE CLOSED.

WHAT MAKES YOU THINK HE WON'T PRESS THE ALARM?

HE'S RIGHT NEXT TO THE DOOR.

WE'D HAVE TO BE INCOMPETENT NOT TO STOP HIM.

DON'T WORRY ABOUT THAT.

HERE. THIS IS WHERE THEY KEEP THE DAY'S RESERVE CASH.

OK, FUCK THAT.

THERE ARE MANY VAULTS DOWNSTAIRS,

BUT THIS IS THE VAULT WE MUST GET INTO.

THIS IS WHERE THE REAL PRIZE IS.

WHAT KIND OF VAULT IS THAT?

SWISS MADE, A CALIBER.

CALIBER.

THAT WILL TAKE... 3 HOURS.

NO, ZED. THAT'S TOO LONG.

THAT'S HOW LONG IT'LL TAKE.

WE HAVE TO BE IN AND OUT LIKE THAT,

OR THERE WILL BE SUSPICION.

A LITTLE TIME IS OK,

BUT TOO LONG...

HOLD ON A SECOND. WHAT IS THIS?

UM...ANOTHER VAULT.

NO. THIS.

I DON'T KNOW. IT CONNECTS THE 2 VAULTS.

WHAT KIND OF VAULT IS THE OTHER ONE?

ALSO SWISS, BUT THIS ONE IS A POSEIDON.

A POSEIDON.

WHY WOULD THESE 2 VAULTS BE CONNECTED?

NO IDEA. I DON'T KNOW.

BECAUSE I CAN GET INTO THE POSEIDON

IN A HALF AN HOUR, MAYBE LESS.

THIS ENTRYWAY IS TOO SMALL

TO GET THE PLATEN OUT.

WE HAVE A LOT OF MERCHANDISE IN THERE.

WE GET IN TO THE SECONDARY VAULT,

TAKE THIS PASSAGE INTO THE CALIBER VAULT.

FROM THE INSIDE, I CAN OPEN IT IN 5 MINUTES.

YOU COULD OPEN IT IN 5 MINUTES?

IT'S EASY.

HOT DAMN! THAT'S OUR ANSWER.

OK.

WHEN IS BASTILLE DAY?

TOMORROW.

TOMORROW? WE'RE DOING THIS TOMORROW?

BUT OF COURSE. YEAH.

THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.

NO, IT'S NOT IMPOSSIBLE.

EVERYONE KNOWS WHAT TO DO.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

JUST GET INTO THE VAULT, WE'LL DO THE REST.

I HAVEN'T SEEN THE BANK.

FUCK THE BANK!

BEFORE WE DO A JOB, WE LIVE LIFE.

IT'S BETTER THAT WAY, OK?

OK.

GOOD.

NOW WE DO HEROIN.

YOU DO A LITTLE HEROIN...

SOME BEER, HASH, SOMETHING,

YOU FEEL...JUST RIGHT.

MAYBE LATER.

[SPEAKS FRENCH]

AS YOU WISH.

COME ON. TRY SOME.

[SNIFFING]

IT'S CALLED CHASING THE DRAGON.

THE CHINESE HAVE BEEN DOING IT FOR CENTURIES.

I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T, BUT...

BUT YOU MUST, HUH?

IF YOU DO IT,

IT WILL MAKE YOU FEEL

AS THOUGH THE REST OF THE WORLD IS...

IN A BUBBLE OF GLASS,

AND YOU ARE RUBBING UP AGAINST IT

LIKE A BAD WINDSHIELD WIPER.

WELL, I THINK I'LL DO IT ANYWAY.

THERE. THAT'S NOTRE DAME. LOOK.

WHERE?

RIGHT THERE.

ZED, DO YOU LIKE FRENCH CARS?

YEAH.

I LIKE THE CADILLAC,

'53 TO '75.

VERY NICE.

HEY, UP HERE YOU CAN SEE THE EIFFEL TOWER. LOOK.

VERY NICE.

IS TOMORROW REALLY BASTILLE DAY?

YES. TOMORROW WE PULL

THE BIGGEST JOB IN FRENCH HISTORY

AND SPEND THE REST OF OUR LIVES IN...

MONTE CARLO! MONTE CARLO!

[CAR HORN HONKING]

[SCREAMING AND YELLING]

YOU ASSHOLES! THAT CAR'S A PIECE OF SHIT!

FAGGOTS!

[SCREAMING IN FRENCH]

WHOA!

WATCH IT. DON'T CRASH MY CAR.

[SPEAKING FRENCH]

[HORNS HONKING]

THIS IS WHERE ALL THE MALE PROSTITUTES

SELL THEMSELVES.

FUCKING FAGS!

[SPEAKING FRENCH]

DR. SEUSS...MY TUB.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

I'LL TELL YOU... LATER, OK?

THIS IS GOOD TO HAVE YOU HERE.

WE COULD NOT DO THIS WITHOUT YOU.

EVERYONE HAS AGREED TO GIVE YOU DOUBLE SHARES.

THAT'S GOOD.

THAT'S GOOD.

WHAT I WAS TELLING YOU

IS THE FINAL CONFLICT BETWEEN 6 AND NUMBER 2

TO FIND OUT WHO'S NUMBER ONE.

NUMBER SIX REALIZES HE IS NUMBER ONE.

IT'S LIKE RULE THE PRISONER OF OURSELVES.

BUT THE BEST EPISODE IS A, B & C WHERE...

[SNIFFS]

HE TAKES 3 DRUGS,

AND HE REALIZES 3 DIFFERENT ALTERNATIVE REALITIES,

AND, UH...

THIS IS REALLY GOOD BEER, ISN'T IT?

YOU KNOW... I HAVE AIDS...

FROM THE NEEDLE.

WHAT?

HEY, LOOK.

UP HERE IS THE ARC DE TRIOMPHE.

COME ON. LOOK.

HEY.

[JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING]

SO HOW LONG HAVE YOU KNOWN ERIC?

SINCE, UH...

19...

WELL, I WAS 12,

AND THEY, UH...

WELL, HIS MOTHER'S AMERICAN.

YEAH. HIS DAD'S FRENCH.

YEAH, THEY DIVORCED

AND HAD SOME WEIRD CUSTODY PLAN WHERE...

HE WOULD SPEND 6 MONTHS WITH HER IN FLORIDA,

AND THEN 6 MONTHS HERE.

ANYWAY, HE JUST LIVED

2 HOUSES UP FROM ME.

IT'S GOOD TO HAVE YOU HERE, MAN.

ERIC LOVES YOU.

HE TELLS ME YOU LIKE VIKING FILMS.

IS THAT RIGHT?

VIKING MOVIES?

YEAH...I GUESS.

I LOVE THAT STUFF.

HELMETS WITH THE FUCKING HORNS ON.

THAT'S WHAT WE SHOULD BE WEARING TOMORROW, RIGHT?

IF YOU EVER WANT TO SEE IT,

I GOT SOME VIDEOS OF VIKING STUFF MADE IN NORWAY.

JUST EXCELLENT.

[YELLING IN FRENCH]

WHAT ABOUT THIS...

WHAT ABOUT THIS MUSIC? DO YOU LIKE DIXIELAND?

YEAH...I GUESS.

I LIVE FOR THIS MUSIC. THIS IS REAL MUSIC.

IT'S GOT A HEART AND A CULTURE ALL OF ITS OWN.

YOU KNOW, IT BEARS NO RESEMBLANCE TO ANYTHING ELSE

ON THIS ENTIRE FUCKING PLANET.

IT'S JUST TOTAL...

PURITY OF ESSENCE.

YEAH.

I MEAN, WHEN THE SAINTS GO MARCHING IN.

HEY, WHEN THE SAINTS GO MARCHING IN!

HEY. HERE. HAVE SOME WINE.

YOU DON'T WANT TO DRINK THIS SHIT. IT'S POISONOUS.

LIKE THE ENGLISH WOULD REALLY KNOW, HUH?

I BRING MY OWN.

MY GOD! LOOK AT HIM ON STAGE.

YOU CRAZY FUCKING FRENCHMAN.

OH, MY GOD.

BRAVO!

BRAVO!

LOOK AT HIM. HE'S CRAZY, HUH?

BRAVO!

HOW WAS I?

I DIDN'T KNOW YOU COULD PLAY.

I CAN'T, BUT IT'S EASY.

YOU JUST SLIDE THE THING.

YOU LIKE THIS PLACE?

YEAH.

GOOD. THIS IS THE REAL PARIS,

HERE IN THIS CELLAR.

UP THERE ON THE STREET,

IT'S ALL JUST STREET TRASH.

YOU HAVE THE POMPIDOU CENTER, THE EIFFEL TOWER,

ALL THAT TOURIST SHIT.

LE LOUVRE.

THE FUCKING LOUVRE.

ALL OF THAT IS FOR THE GUIDE BUSES.

EVEN THE PEOPLE, PARISIANS, THEY ARE SHIT.

NO ONE IN FRANCE LIKES THEM. IT'S TRUE. THEY'RE ASSHOLES,

BUT DOWN HERE

AWAY FROM EVERYONE UP THERE,

THE TOURISTS, THE ATTRACTIONS,

THE FUCKING POSTCARDS,

PEOPLE CHANGE.

THEY FORGET BECAUSE THEY CANNOT SEE

THAT THEY ARE IN PARIS.

IT COULD BE ANYWHERE.

THERE'S THE MUSIC, THE FOOD.

THE WINE.

EVEN THE WINE'S OK.

SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF PARIS, ZED? COME ON.

ZED, TELL ME. COME ON.

WELL, IF THIS IS PARIS...

YEAH.

THEN I LIKE IT.

GOOD! GOOD!

COME ON. LET'S DANCE.

NO. I WILL PUKE.

HEY. COME ON.

COME ON, ZED. LET'S DANCE.

HEY, ZED. COME ON.

JUST SNORT THIS WITH YOUR NOSE.

WHAT'S GOING ON?

WHY DON'T YOU DO SOME? HEY.

COME ON. COME ON, MY FRIEND.

SHOULDN'T WE BE DOING THIS

SOMEWHERE MORE PRIVATE?

FUCK THEM. THEY CAN GET THEIR OWN.

COME ON.

NO, I MEAN, IS IT SAFE

TO DO IT HERE?

WHAT, FROM THE POLICE?

SIT DOWN.

DOING HEROIN HERE

IS SAFER THAN IN AMSTERDAM.

I SHOULDN'T DO ANYMORE.

BUT YOU MUST.

AND IF YOU WANT TO FEEL GOOD, HUH?

I'M REALLY TIRED.

IF YOU WANT TO FEEL GOOD, WHY NOT?

YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE, MAN.

DOING IT WITH THE NOSE

HARDLY EVEN AFFECTS ME.

WHY DO YOU TALK TO STREET TRASH LIKE THAT, EH?

I WASN'T.

WHATEVER. COME ON.

I WANT TO TALK TO YOU. COME ON.

MEATY PUSSY, MAN.

OH, GOD.

NO MORE.

OPEN YOUR MOUTH.

NO.

SHUT UP. OPEN YOUR MOUTH.

YOU NEED IT.

WAIT.

TO SEE PARIS, YOU NEED IT.

ZED, NOW SWALLOW.

SWALLOW IT, SWALLOW IT, SWALLOW IT.

[COUGHING AND GAGGING]

IT'S OK.

GOOD.

WHAT WAS THAT?

IT'S NEW. IT'S GOOD.

TAKE A BIG BREATH.

I WANTED TO TELL YOU, ZED,

THERE ARE OTHERS HERE IN PARIS,

OTHERS THAT COULD OPEN THAT VAULT.

THERE ARE OTHERS IN GERMANY, IN SWITZERLAND,

ONE IN BELGIUM.

ALL COULD DO THE JOB,

BUT I DON'T NEED THOSE ASSHOLES.

WHY? BECAUSE I HAVE YOU.

I HAVE THE ONLY MAN I CAN TRUST

IN THE WHOLE WORLD,

MY VERY GOOD FRIEND WHO I LOOK UP TO.

HEY, HEY.

HEY, YOU ARE THE ONE, HEY?

YOU ARE THE ONE, ZED.

ZED.

IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU.

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING? IT'S GOOD.

WHAT... DID YOU GIVE ME?

NOTHING. NOTHING BAD.

DON'T SWEAT IT.

HEY, HEY.

I THINK I'M GOING TO DIE.

HA HA HA! WE ALL DIE.

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING

IS THAT IN LIFE WE EXPERIENCE EVERYTHING.

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

NO.

NO.

TOMORROW IS THE GREATEST DAY OF OUR LIVES.

THE BEGINNING OF OUR LIVES.

THE END OF THE COMPLICATION.

DO YOU HAVE FIRE?

EH?

FRANçOIS, BEFORE, WHEN WE WOULD MAKE A BOMB

TO BLOW UP A CAFE OR SOMETHING,

IT WOULD COST US A WEEK'S WAGE

WORKING AT THE FUCKING NEWSPAPER.

AND FOR ME IT WAS ONE WEEK

AND ONE HALF WEEK.

[GRUNTING AND MOANING]

Eric: COME ON. WAKE UP, SLEEPY HEAD.

WE HAVE A BANK TO ROB.

CAN I GET YOU SOME EGGS, SUNNYSIDE UP?

I FEEL LIKE I DRANK FURNITURE POLISH.

IT WAS BAD SPANISH WINE YOU DRANK.

LOOK, YOU SHOULD GET READY.

THE BANK WILL BE OPEN FOR 3 HOURS,

AND TRAFFIC WILL BE HELL.

I NEED TO GET MY EQUIPMENT.

WE WENT BY YOUR HOTEL LAST NIGHT.

YOU DON'T REMEMBER?

WE HAVE ALL YOUR THINGS HERE.

GET UP AND SHIT SO WE CAN GO.

[MUMBLING]

HOW IS THIS GOING TO WORK?

WE GO IN, GET WHAT WE WANT, COME OUT.

ONCE WE GET IN,

WE WILL WEAR THESE TO COVER OUR FACES.

THEY HAVE VIDEO CAMERAS?

WE'VE TAKEN CARE OF THAT, SO DON'T WORRY.

EVERYONE KNOWS WHAT TO DO. JUST DO YOUR JOB,

AND WE'LL ALL BE FINE, SO DON'T WORRY.

TOUT LE MONDE àà SON FLINGUE?

YOUR GUN.

THANKS.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

FOLLOW US. DON'T SAY ANYTHING.

IT WILL GO SMOOTH.

JUST LIKE THE OLD DAYS,

EXCEPT IT'S NO LONGER THE MINIMART.

HEY.

HEY.

[YELLING]

[WOMAN SCREAMING]

[IMITATING GUITAR SOUNDS]

WHOO!

WE FUCKING DID IT!

ALLEZ!

[TELEPHONE DROPS]

[GUNSHOT]

FUCK.

HEY, HEY, I CAN OPEN THE VAULT.

SHUT THE FUCK UP!

[GUNSHOT]

[SINGING IN FRENCH]

DON'T YOU EVER CONFLICT WITH ME

DURING WORK AGAIN. DO YOU HEAR ME?

YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO KILL ANYONE.

I DIDN'T REALIZE YOU WERE IN CHARGE NOW.

IF HE HAD OPENED THE VAULT,

HE WOULD HAVE SAVED US A FUCKING HOUR.

GREAT. WE'VE GONE FROM BEING THIEVES TO MURDERERS.

HERE YOU GET THE DEATH PENALTY

JUST FOR ROBBING A FEDERAL BANK.

I THOUGHT THEY ABOLISHED THE DEATH PENALTY.

THAT'S WHAT THEY TELL YOU, SO WHO CARES?

I NEED TO TAKE A PISS.

WHY DON'T YOU OPEN THE VAULT?

HERE.

I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THIS.

OUI.

[BELCHES]

AAH!

HEY, ZED. WHAT IS IT? WHAT'S GOING ON?

WHAT?

IT'S NOTHING. NOTHING.

JUST STAY HERE, OK?

RICARDO.

PLUS UN GESTE!

[THUD]

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?

OH, SHIT.

WHO GIVES A DAMN WHO SEES US, ANYWAY?

I CAN'T SEE A FUCKING THING!

OH, FUCK.

[SCREAMING]

HEY, THIS IS INSANE.

I MEAN, I'M A U.S. CITIZEN.

I'M JUST HERE EXCHANGING SOME DOLLARS!

YOU MUST LET ME GO. I'M AN AMERICAN!

YOU KNOW, FROM AMERICA?

U.S. OF A.?

COME ON! YOU UNDERSTAND ENGLISH?

IF IT WASN'T FOR MY COUNTRY,

YOU'D ALL BE SPEAKING GERMAN.

[CRYING]

OUí.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

[RING]

THEY ARE DEAD.

CHECK THE WINDOW.

[RING]

AAH!

[RING]

BANQUE INTERNATIONALE DE PARIS.

OH, MY GOD.

IT'S THE POLICE!

MERDE! LES FLICS!

OK.

[WHISTLING]

WHAT'S GOING ON?

AH, NOTHING.

THEY WERE JUST SCARING THEM.

WELL, DID YOU TELL THEM TO SHUT UP?

NO. THEY'RE ASSHOLES JUST HAVING FUN.

SO, HOW DOES IT WORK?

FUCKED UP MY DRILL BIT.

IT'S OK. YOU CAN BUY ANOTHER ONE.

KEEP YOUR FINGERS CROSSED.

PERFECT.

OH. EXCELLENT. EXCELLENT. WHAT NEXT?

WE FIND THE FUSE BOX.

I'LL FIND IT.

IT'S USUALLY UPSTAIRS.

I'LL FIND IT FOR YOU.

IT WOULD BE BETTER IF I FIND IT FOR YOU.

NO. IT'S RIGHT HERE.

UH, LET'S SEE.

WHEN I TELL YOU TO, YOU THROW THIS SWITCH OFF

AND THEN BACK ON AGAIN. ALL RIGHT?

ANY OTHER SWITCH MIGHT TURN ON THE ALARM.

OH. I WOULDN'T WANT TO DO THAT, MAN.

GOT IT?

GOT IT.

READY?

READY.

GO.

IT WORKED.

IT WORKED.

IT WORKED.

[LAUGHING]

OH! GOOD JOB, MAN. GOOD JOB.

OPEN SESAME.

OOH!

[LAUGHING]

NO PROBLEM. DIME-STORE QUALITY.

3 MINUTES MAX.

THEN DO IT.

[GUNSHOT]

GET OUT! COME ON!

FUCK!

ANOTHER SECURITY GUARD?

YEAH. IT MUST BE.

I'M ABOUT TO STAIN MY PANTS.

HEY, ME, TOO.

ERIC! IS EVERYTHING OK, MAN?

WHAT'S HAPPENING?

SHH! THERE'S SOME ASSHOLE IN THE VAULT.

COME ON.

SO BLAST HIS FUCKING ASS.

IT'S THREE AGAINST ONE.

SHUT UP!

I'M ONLY TRYING TO HELP.

JUST LET ME THINK.

THERE'S NO NEED TO SNAP AT ME.

HEY!

NO!

WHAT'S THIS GUY'S PROBLEM?

CIGARETTE.

HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

Guard: OK.

YOU CAN'T DO THIS. IT'S TOO DANGEROUS.

IT'S TOO MUCH!

I LIKE DANGER.

YES, I DO.

OH, FUCK.

AAH!

REAL FUNNY, MAN.

YOU GUYS ARE A BUNCH OF HYSTERICAL FUCKING PRANKSTERS.

COME ON. LET'S GO CHECK OUT THE DAMAGE.

Zed: REAL MATURE.

HEY! ZED, LOOK.

I BEAT YOU. I OPENED IT IN UNDER 3 MINUTES.

I'M GREAT. I'M SO GREAT. AHH.

YOU GO AROUND TO THE OTHER MAIN VAULT DOOR.

WAIT FOR ME UP THERE.

WHEN I TELL YOU TO, OPEN IT UP.

I SAID, GO AROUND TO THE OTHER VAULT DOOR.

Oliver: OK, WHEN YOU TELL ME TO,

OPEN IT UP.

WE ARE RICH, MAN.

[SOBBING]

WE ARE RICH.

HERE.

FUCK.

I'M GOING TO SHOW THE OTHERS.

ZED.

WE ARE RICH, MAN.

WE'RE NOT OUT OF HERE YET.

YES, BUT WE ARE RICH.

[SCREAMING]

AAH!

[WHISPERING]

LUCKY DAY.

[GIGGLING]

[GUNSHOTS]

[SCRATCHING]

[GASPING]

OK.

[DROPS GUN]

OK, OLIVER, OPEN IT UP.

HEY!

[FAINTLY] HEY, OLIVER. OPEN IT UP!

[BANGING]

HEY! BONEHEAD!

LET ME OUT OF HERE!

OLIVER!

OH. ZED.

HELLO!

YEAH. HANG ON.

TURN THE DIAL!

IT'S TURNING.

HERE IT COMES.

WHERE WERE YOU, ASLEEP?

GIVE ME A HAND.

IT'S INCREDIBLE! I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE IT.

GIVE ME A HAND, WILL YOU?

IT'S WONDERFUL.

YEAH. COME ON. MOVE IT.

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GUARD?

HE'S DEAD.

GOD.

FUCK!

FUCK!

FUCK!

NO.

SHOULD WE GET SOME CASH WHILE WE'RE HERE?

WHAT FOR?

SO WE CAN CELEBRATE TONIGHT.

WELL, YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO SPEND IT ANYWHERE

'CAUSE IT'S TOO EASILY TRACEABLE.

YOU SURE WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO EXCHANGE IT, EITHER.

BUT OTHER THAN THAT, IT'S A REALLY GOOD IDEA.

YEAH. I SUPPOSE YOU'RE RIGHT.

[SCREAMING]

COME ON. KILL THAT FUCKING BITCH!

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH YOUR CUT?

I DON'T KNOW.

I'D LIKE TO... BUY AN ISLAND

IN THE SOUTH PACIFIC.

MAYBE PUT MY EX-WIFE ON IT.

AND NEVER SEE HER AGAIN.

REALLY? YOU GOT ANY KIDS?

NOT THAT I KNOW OF.

[LAUGHS]

YEAH. ME, TOO.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

I WANT TO GET A HARLEY.

I MIGHT GO TO SOUTH AMERICA, YOU KNOW?

I HEAR THAT'S WHERE THE DRUGS COME FROM.

JUST GET SO MUCH.

STORE IT ALL UP IN A SHACK SOMEWHERE

AND LIVE LIKE A KING FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.

NEVER HAVE TO RUN.

WE GOT SOMETHING TO COVER THIS UP WITH?

WHAT FOR?

WELL...

WE CAN'T EXACTLY WALK OUT ON THE STREET

WITH A PLATEN OF GOLD.

THAT'S GONNA LOOK A LITTLE...

IT'S NOT GONNA MATTER MUCH NOW, IS IT?

I THINK THE POLICE KNOW WHAT WE'RE UP TO.

WHAT?

YOU DON'T KNOW?

KNOW WHAT?

THEY'RE OUTSIDE,

BUT ERIC'S GOT IT UNDER CONTROL.

HE'S TALKING TO THEM RIGHT NOW.

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

THE COPS ARE HERE?

DON'T WORRY, MAN.

THE SAINTS GO MARCHING IN.

AAH!

HEY!

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?

GIVE ME THAT.

GIVE ME THAT!

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, MAN?

HEY?

GET HIM!

OH, FUCK!

YOU LOVE YOUR BITCH WHORE GIRLFRIEND THAT MUCH?

SHE'S REALLY FUCKED WITH YOUR MIND.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

LOOK AT IT. IT'S ALL FOR US.

THE ATTENTION. THE SMOKE.

THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHO THEY'RE DEALING WITH.

THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT KIND OF MEN WE ARE.

BUNCH OF FUCKING IDIOT BONEHEAD MEN.

YOU CAN NO LONGER BE IN OUR CLUB.

YOU FORFEIT YOUR CUT OF THE PIE.

OH, GEE. I GUESS THIS MEANS

OUR FRIENDSHIP IS IN TROUBLE.

SHIT, ZED.

I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN YEARS.

YOU HARDLY KNOW ME.

NEVER LET A GIRL COME BETWEEN TWO MEN.

Man: LET US IN THE BUILDING!

ERIC!

ERIC!

ERIC.

ERIC!

ERIC!

FUCK! CLAUDE!

OLIVER, TAKE A HOSTAGE!

ZED.

THEY'VE HURT YOU.

THIS IS THE END!

WHERE ARE WE GOING?

WE'RE GOING TO LOCK OURSELVES

INTO ONE OF THE VAULTS

IF ONE IS STILL OPEN.

GROOVY.

HEY.

OH! OH, I'M SORRY, OLIVER.

WH-WHAT CAN I DO, EH?

BASTARD!

HEY! SEE YOU, MY FRIEND!

I'M ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.

LISTEN.

THERE'S NO GUNFIGHTING.

SO?

WAIT. WAIT HERE.

THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY FUCKING LIFE!

[GUNSHOT]

COME ON. WE'LL BE SAFER INSIDE.

THINK.

OHH...

IT'S ZED.

HOW ARE YOU DOING, EH?

GOOD?

OH, I'M DOING GREAT.

WHAT'S YOUR GIRLFRIEND NAME?

ZOE.

ZOE. OH.

OH, IT'S A BEAUTIFUL NAME.

ZOE, THIS IS ERIC.

VIENS, MA ZOE. VIENS.

VIENS.

[SPEAKING FRENCH]

OH, YEAH. TRY AGAIN.

OH, I'M SORRY, ZED. I'M SORRY.

HEY, ZED.

I'LL KILL YOU.

IT MEANS NOTHING TO ME, OUR FRIENDSHIP.

ERIC, THERE'S NO FUCKING WAY OUT OF HERE.

BUT YOU'RE WRONG, MY FRIEND.

THIS IS MY WAY OUT-- THIS DIME-STORE COUGE

WITH HER MOTOR-DRIVEN ASS.

LOOK OUT FOR NUMBER ONE.

YOU FIND YOUR OWN.

AAH!

HEY! DID YOU SEE HOW SHE RAN?

DID YOU SEE HOW SHE RAN? DID YOU SEE?

SHE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU, MAN.

FUCKING PUSSY ONLY CARES ABOUT PUSSY.

SO...WHAT DO YOU SAY, ZED?

YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M GONNA KILL YOU.

WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT, ZED? TELL ME.

OH! FUCKING BITCH!

BITCH!

I GOT YOUR BALLS, MAN.

OX!

WHERE IS THY YOKE?

HEY. HEY.

[LAUGHING]

I'LL GIVE YOU A LITTLE KISS, MY FRIEND.

CIAO.

[GUN CLICKS]

[GUNFIRE STOPS]

THE HOSPITAL?

NO.

COME ON. I HAVE A CAR.

I'M SO TIRED.

WE'LL GO TO MY FLAT.

YOU CAN REST THERE.

DO YOU FEEL PAIN?

NO.

IT WAS MOSTLY HIS BLOOD.

I HAVE A SHOWER.

YOU CAN CLEAN UP THERE.

THANK YOU, ZOE.

YOU'LL GET WELL.

THEN I'LL SHOW YOU THE REAL PARIS.

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY ARTISAN HOME ENTERTAINMENT

CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org--