Original subtitles

Welcome to Good Old Congress.

Marie, most kids around here with a history like yours, they don't get

But, uh, God, you graduates, you can wipe all that clean and start fresh. So

don't fuck it up.

I have been dying to meet you.

Is this the biggest dick you've ever seen? Relatively.

Jordan! What the fuck?

You're Sue.

Or I'm just a very good magician.

Golden Boy suffered a full psychotic break. He killed Brink.

I'm so sorry.

If you're watching this, I guess things got fucked. They have my brother. He's

underneath the scoreboard. They call it the woods. It's like this fucked up

hospital.

Sam, go to sleep.

Don't say another fucking word about this. What are you doing here? Your

sent me to get you out of here.

What the hell happened?

I mean, maybe Sam penetrated the Yurt Canal with his member?

That's the sum total of your searing insight that Sam skull -fucked Bob here.

Okay, this is Greg.

And I don't know. Sam's stronger than Gooder Boy ever was.

I don't know how to contain someone like that.

That's painfully obvious.

Fine, Sam.

I want the whole security team on this.

Well, half of them are dead.

Then use the other half.

Because if Walt finds out about this, Doctor... I can promise you and I get

skull -fucked next.

Maybe this is good.

She got out of the hellhole. It looks like a meteor crashed here.

Maybe Sam can jump like Maeve does. He landed here with Emma and then jumped

again. What were you thinking?

They have to do something.

Yeah, but you didn't do anything.

And of all people, you went to Emma?

What is it?

New rankings are up.

Andre's number one, you're two, and I'm still five.

Wow. Congrats.

Rankings? Really? We got bigger fucking problems.

Says number one.

But you're right.

We do.

Turns out the school has a fucking Mengele health clinic. We don't know

on it.

If... If Brink was, maybe other professors, maybe Dean Shetty.

But you guys are gonna get a green van and a talking dog and fucking solve it?

You're just gonna end up like that fucking cricket.

Emma. The lost girl who's in deep shit?

Her name is Emma.

Jordan's right.

Fucking thank you.

Whoever Emma is, it's not here.

Jade, come on. I told you not to do anything stupid.

Why don't you ever fucking listen to me?

This girl could be dead, Andre.

We are in over our heads.

Hey, are you okay? Did I squash you?

You look a little bigger. Did you grow?

I think I must have swallowed something when I went through that guy's head.

Where are we?

Old drive -in movie place.

Luke and me used to come every weekend before it closed.

You have a piece of eardrum on your shoulder.

I killed that guy.

Well, he was a sadistic asshole.

Does that make you feel any better?

What if he had kids?

You saved me.

Emma.

You did.

Okay.

Okay.

Can you think there's a phone in here somewhere? I mean, we need help.

Oh, no.

There's only one person who can help. I gotta get a hold of Luke.

So sorry.

Your brother died.

I know I make weird jokes, but that's a really, really weird joke.

It's not. I should have told you sooner. I'm so sorry.

What are you talking about? Nothing could kill Luke. He's too strong.

He killed himself.

I'm here, Sam.

If I do... I won't.

You will.

I'll fuck up somehow.

Everybody always leaves me.

Promise I'm with you.

Every mystery, scattered clues, and hidden corners of darkness.

I'm Tech Knight, and I won't stop searching until I've found... the

whole truth.

Cadolcan University.

A place where only the bravest heroes graduate.

Queen Maeve.

Adib. Atre.

And, of course, myself.

But tragedy has rocked this institution to its core.

The rising star took his own life.

But why did the golden boy, who had everything, do it?

This whole case is a rabbit hole into the unknown.

And I won't stop plunging its depths until I get there.

Cut, guys, cut.

Bunging its depth?

I mean, what?

Come on.

Let's just... Let's go again. Let's reset.

I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit, and on the slitted sheet I sit.

All right.

Ready.

Good morning.

It's an honor to have such an esteemed alumnus back with us.

Bullshit.

You hate that I'm here.

I make you nervous.

I can understand why you think that.

Your reputation is formidable.

Was it Ironcast who killed himself the morning after you interrogated him?

Strange how many of your subjects end up dead or beaten into comas.

I myself have nothing to hide.

Are you sure about that?

Small bead of sweat on your brow.

Adrenaline seeping from your pores. And you're ovulating, by the way.

You must be a delight at parties.

Ashley Barrett asked me to extend your production every courtesy, but I must

say, I'm not sure I understand why you're here.

Hashtag, why did Golden Boy do it? It's still trending, number one. Yes, but...

What has Ashley told you? You mean, did she tell me that Golden Boy killed Brink

in a misguided attempt to rescue his brother from the woods?

So you know exactly why.

But it's my job.

It's our job to make sure no one else knows.

And how do you intend to do that?

Well, the usual.

Misdirection, obfuscation, find a patsy and destroy their life.

You're going to blame an innocent student for Luke's hysteria.

Oh, yeah.

I'm going to Johnny Depp someone so hard they're going to want to crawl into a

hole and die.

Just stay away from the top five.

There's always more where they came from. You'll manage.

Oh, I would love to chat with Golden Boy's brother.

For background.

Sam, is it?

Oh, no, I'm afraid that's not possible. He's far too dangerous.

I'm going to need access to the tapes from campus surveillance.

A full list of golden boys.

Classmates, girlfriends, fuckboys.

Oh, and a couple of reflectors from the film department.

Fucking Roy forgot our bounces.

You look high as fuck.

What, me? No, not at all.

Hey, sorry.

You're, uh... You're right.

And I'm sorry. I should have listened.

I don't know where Emma is, and I don't know what to do.

And I might also be a tiny bit high as fuck.

My dad knows.

Knows what?

Everything.

About the woods.

What they're doing.

And he told me to drop it.

Jesus. Yeah.

Maybe he's trying to protect you.

No.

You know, when I was a kid... When I was alone, I used to watch his Area 51

movies over and over again, and I'd try to copy his stance.

When he holds out his hand, made of steel.

Yeah.

Full of shit.

All I wanted was to be like him, and he just... This whole

time, he was mixed up in all this.

He's not the man that I thought he was.

Well, you don't know that. Maybe he... No, I do, because... Sorry.

Fuck me.

Shahimith's lover was a handsome, arrogant venture capitalist, and now

on the floor of his chef's kitchen.

Was his demise the unhappiest of happy endings?

Crushed under all 700 pounds of his girlfriend.

Or was someone smothering?

Rufus, right?

I heard you're a psychic.

Yeah.

Totally.

Telepathy, astral projection, clairvoyance, and you are... Marie.

I'm fucking with you. You're ranked second. Everyone knows you.

Yeah, um, so... You're looking for your roommate, but she's not the only girl

you're looking for.

A, uh... Hmm.

Sister.

Look, I don't have any money.

But Vought gave me a bunch of free shit I don't use, so... Or there are other

ways you can thank me.

Right. This was a mistake.

Hey, come on. I'm fucking with you.

Can you really find her? Yeah.

I just need something that belongs to her.

I can see your friend.

Where?

Is he okay?

She looks rough, and she's with some dude.

Come closer.

I need a stronger connection.

Fuck off. I'm busy.

Open this goddamn door. What the fuck?

It's not what it looks like.

What the fuck?

Stop! What the fuck, you crazy jerk?

Piece of dickless shit.

Are you okay? That was fucking dope. How'd you do that?

No idea.

Should we call somebody?

No. The guy's like walking roof and all, blowing pheromones on anyone who gets

too close. Fuck him.

What were you thinking, asking him for help?

I can't just do nothing.

You are unbelievable. I would kill to be number two again. I would kill you to

be number two again.

You're really gonna throw it all away? I'm not throwing it all away. I'm not,

but Emma's my friend.

What happened to you don't owe anyone anything and to leave you the fuck

Maybe I was wrong.

Maybe you're an idiot.

You know what?

You're full of shit.

You know I'm right. You're just scared.

Tech fucking Knight is on campus.

If he finds out what you're doing, you're lucky you end up in prison. He

people up.

Since when do you care about anyone not named Jordan?

Fine. Next time I won't rescue you then. You didn't. Fucking did.

I exploded his dick.

Because I distracted him.

Tag team coxplosion.

All right?

Fucking weirdo.

So just play it like we talked about.

You'll be fine. You hear me?

Andre, I need to know that you heard me. Yeah.

And Andre, this goes bad.

I won't be able to save you.

Gentlemen!

Need any touch -ups before we go?

Me, me, my, mo, moo.

Roy, this is my frame.

Here.

Theophilus. Fizzles, baby bees, bravely buzzing around the buoyant boy, buoyant

boy. Light.

Camera.

I'll give it a count.

Five, four, three.

To understand Golden Boy's carnage, we first must understand the man.

And who knew him better than his best friend, Andre Anderson?

Andre and his father, superhero and God -U trustee, Polarity.

Join us now.

Well, let me start with the big question.

Why did he do it, Andre?

I don't know.

I think it's obvious.

He couldn't hack it.

Just wasn't strong enough to handle the pressure. That's not it.

He was stronger than all of us. Well, that must have been hard for you,

that you'd never beat him.

No. It's fine.

Fine? If he wasn't at this school, you would have been number one.

Maybe. I don't know.

Prink would have made sure of it.

He loved you.

And Golden Boy killed him.

That doesn't upset you?

Of course it does. So there you go.

Have you always been angry at Golden Boy?

No. I loved him.

You gave your whole life to him.

You're one of the most powerful heroes on campus.

Yet you drop out of criminology and change your major to hero management?

I was going to be his manager.

We were going to spend our lives together.

Which raises the question, how did you not know he was this disturbed?

I wish I had known.

It kills me that I missed it.

Take that glove off. I'll take your fucking hand off.

I'm sorry.

I'm just nervous.

What did he say to you just before he died?

That, um...

That he loved me.

How long have you been eating Golden

Boy's girlfriend's hole?

Is that why he blew himself up?

What do you mean?

You wanted what Golden Boy had. His girlfriend.

The number one spot. He found out about you and Kate.

Cracked. Am I right? No, no, no. That didn't happen until... So it did happen.

think we should take five.

You're a fucking hack.

Andre. No, no, no. No camera can hide the fact that you're just a small man

playing fucking hero because you've never been one.

No, you get treated like a god here.

What kind of hero is fucking chicken shit to do anything heroic?

Fuck this.

Fuck you.

I'm done.

We'll find it in the edit.

It worked.

You're a big you.

In all my glory.

You always do that.

Why do you always do that?

Do what?

Whenever I say something nice, your voice gets all twisty, like it isn't

Look, I appreciate the compliment, but... But I'm sick in the head.

No,

I wasn't going to put it that way. It's just, I mean, my superpower is puking.

It's embarrassing, you know?

I'm not the best judge for what's humiliating. I used to quit stuff up my

for money.

What? I'm kidding.

Yeah, no, it wasn't for money.

And honestly, after what you did for me, I would eat your puke.

You know, I take it back. You are sick.

I know.

Multiple mental hospitals.

You okay?

Maybe not.

It's scary for me to be out here.

And Luke was... He was all I had, so... I'm here

now.

With you.

But I'm pretty cool.

I know you're cool. That's why I'm positive you'll leave.

Trust me, I got nowhere to go.

You know what would be really fucked up? What if under my shirt it was all

nipple? Like your nipple's so big it spans your whole torso?

No, like a triple nipple, except it's a quinquadruple nipple.

What a what a nipple? It means 50.

What if I just had like 50 nipples under my shirt?

I could live with that.

Kind of low -key into it.

Together. Good.

Hey, is there more of that back there? Yeah. But fair warning, my puke tastes a

lot better.

I can make you a bowl.

Yeah, see?

We're both sick.

Please stop.

Shut up!

Ray.

We didn't stop by for lunch today.

I'm sorry.

Was I supposed to?

I'm not supposed to.

No. But you have been.

Anything going on?

You're the dean.

Can you get me out of all this homework I've been getting?

Your roommate's Emma, right? She's the one who gets small.

Yep.

Why?

Have you seen her recently?

Oh, she, um, saves the night at this guy Austin's place every night.

What's this about?

I'm just checking she's okay.

She missed a few classes.

No big deal.

Okay, everyone, listen up.

So, I have a surprise for you.

We are fortunate to have a guest lecturer who revolutionized the field in

superhero crime fighting. So, please, welcome a son of God, you.

Tech night.

My journey, four blockbusters, six people's choice, began in this very

class 20 years ago. Now, I am eager to pass on my knowledge to the

next generation.

Today, we will focus on interrogation techniques that I developed.

And for that...

I will need a volunteer.

Marie Moreau, the guardian of

Godalkin.

So, Miss Moreau, you stopped Golden Boy's rampage.

Not just me. There were others.

Andre Anderson, Golden Boy's best friend, whom I noticed has skipped class

today.

The two of you make a good -looking couple.

We're not together.

When you start out, you want to establish a baseline and build a

Miss Moreau's body language is open, and she's maintaining good eye contact.

Walk me through that day.

I went to see Professor Brink.

Luke had already killed him. We fought.

He killed himself.

I've told this story a lot.

But not the whole story.

Why were you going to see Brink? I wanted to discuss my class schedule.

Lie. Pupil dilation. See it? The classic sign. Why were you really there? Was

it to talk about his distaste for you?

Bullseye. Heart rate just elevated.

Professor Brink only admitted students with impeccable qualifications into

fighting. Your powers are, um, nasty.

There's no way he would admit you.

And yet here I am.

Oh.

So, not being good enough for the door spot.

What are you hiding?

What do you know?

Nothing. He was going to expel you, wasn't he? No. Pretty convenient that he

deep fried that very same day. Were you in on it with Luke?

No.

I didn't do anything.

Now or then?

Then. Now.

Both. Which is it? I couldn't stop Luke.

I went to Brink because he kicked me out.

I saw Luke and I fucking ran.

And the only reason I'm still alive is because Jordan Lee held him off long

enough for me to get away.

Jordan's the hero.

Not me.

And that's how you break a witness, folks.

It's not her bus. Oh, isn't it?

Take care.

Bye.

That was impressive.

But I asked you to leave the top five alone.

Digging for the truth is a rush.

Ah, it's better than sex.

Still, no one will believe Marie Moreau is responsible for Golden Boy's demise.

That's true.

In fact...

I can't pin this on any of these kids.

There's not a Patsy in the bunch.

Pity.

For your show, I mean.

Which is why I'm going to pin it on you.

Excuse me?

You were right.

I shouldn't go after the top fives. They could be real earners.

You, on the other hand, are just a... Well, you're just a human.

You have no evidence I've done anything wrong.

No?

What about Sam escaping from the woods?

Yeah, I saw it on your face when I first brought up his name.

Didn't take much to confirm.

Hmm.

Wait till Vought finds out.

I'd say taking the fall for Golden Boy is getting off easy.

Thanks for all your help.

Please, no.

You can't run forever, you know.

Yeah, buddy, they're gonna find you.

And hurt you again.

Just leave me alone, television Jason Ritter.

Only this time, they'll hurt her too.

And it'll be all your fault you couldn't protect her.

No, no, I won't let them.

know who hurt you he hurts everyone in the woods dr cardosa

you know what you have to do no no no no well you know what you want to

do just shut up television jason ritter you have to kill him

Shut up! Shut up!

Stop!

Sam?

Who are you talking to? I won't let him, Emma. I promise, I won't.

Hey,

what do you mean? Who's him?

Dr. Cardoza. Haven't you been listening? He's dangerous and I have to stop him.

No! No more talking! Just stop!

Please, stop!

Who's Dr. Cardoza, Sam?

You heard me.

He hurt me, and he won't leave me alone.

Okay, Sam, I don't know what's wrong. What can I do? How can I help? No, you

just stop!

Just stop! Please, stop!

Andre? You think anyone will know it was me?

You okay?

I don't know what I'd do without you.

What did I do?

Nothing.

That's all I want right now.

Nothing.

In that case, you're welcome.

What the hell was that back there?

I said the truth, finally.

And now Tech Night's probably going to crucify me and I'm going to get

I didn't ask you to do that.

Yeah, you did.

Like... Several fucking times, actually. But I didn't want you to bury yourself

in the process. You keep doing the dumb thing.

Fuck.

You're welcome.

I don't mean you're stupid.

You're fucking smart.

So what's your angle? My angle is that sometimes people don't have an angle.

Sometimes they're just actual human beings.

You said I was scared.

I was just talking shit.

Okay, you're the only one who actually fought Golden Boy. Yeah, but... I'm so

fucking scared.

Don't be.

I'm sorry, that's not what you meant.

Yeah.

No.

It's happening.

Oh, my God.

Emma.

Hi. Are you okay?

Sorry, Sam's going after Dr. Cardoza. We have to stop him. Who?

Luke's brother.

He's actually kind of hot. No, who's Cardoza?

Dr. Cardoza.

He used to work with Brink. I know where he lives. Oh, shit.

Pretty spot to confess your sins.

Your camera crew?

You said leave them behind.

I wanted us away from the camper security cameras, too.

Oh, if you think dragging me to a secluded area for a blowy is going to

you.

Well, let's see.

Did you recently visit the Brain Tumor Center at Johns Hopkins?

You have a small tumor in your brain.

It will eventually be fatal, but I imagine you already know that.

Hazard, you also know it's the cause of your...

Shall we say unusual proclivity?

I don't know what you mean.

Oh.

Compilation of your greatest hits.

Skull -fucking.

So how do we think your 18 to 49 demo will fare when we broadcast you

every single hole you come across?

What do you want?

There's nothing to find at Gordieu or with me.

Nothing to tell Vought and no reason to stay.

As long as you're off campus by end of day, this video stays off Instagram.

Oops.

It's easier to probe the dark hole of conspiracy and accept a tragedy with no

meaning or motive.

But that's what this is.

Golden Boy simply...

snapped. Fortunately, Cadulcan University remains as resilient as ever.

And Eden for the young, super -abled to blossom into their abilities.

Now, with this case behind me, I move on to the next mystery.

To seek out the whole truth.

We good?

Give me a few minutes alone, please.

Is that my mom's sauce?

Daddy!

What?

Daddy! Daddy!

Son, son, look at me, look at me. Whatever you need, I can get for you,

Just, just, just let my family go, please.

They're not real!

You're not real, you're all... fucking puppet!

I don't want to!

He can't have her!

Go,

go, go, go, go, go!

Sam, Sam, I'm in here. Look at me.

You don't have to do this, okay?

Sam?

Sam, you don't want to do this. I know you. I escaped and you caught me. You're

one of them!

We didn't know who you were then.

Sam, let us help you.

No!

You are not touching me again until you get the fuck out of here!

You're all fucking puppets!

Sam, you said I was your hero, okay? Let me help you again.

No, they're not!

What the fuck is this problem?

Sam, Sam, we love Luke.

When we found out he was trying to rescue you, we tried to help.

Sam!

Emma?

Let me go!

Sam, you're all right. I'm here. You're okay.

They're going to put us back in the woods. I have to stop them. Why won't

let me stop them? Hey, wherever we go, we promise we're in this together.

Sam, we're gonna make this right. I promise.

We'll pre -

I like to get to know y 'all so I can show y 'all. Put the pussy on y 'all

I told y 'all. Give me all your numbers so I can phone y 'all. The girl at the

sink didn't call me y 'all by.

Not on the bed, lay me on your sofa.

Before you come, I need to say my cho -cha. You do what you don't or you will

won't cha.

Go downtown and eat it like a vo -cha.

See my hips and my hips so cha.

See my ass and my lips don't cha. Lost a few pounds in my whip for ya.

This the kind of pizza go ba -ta -ta.

Ba -ta -ta -ta, ta -ta -ta -ta -ta -ta.

Sets me so good, I say blah, blah, blah.

Work it.

I need a glass of water.

Boy, oh boy, it's good to know ya. Is it worth it? Let me work it. I put my

thing down, flip it.

If you're a fly gal, get your nails done. Get a pedicure, get your hair did.

Boy, lift it up, let's make a toaster.

Let's get drunk, it's gonna bring us closer.

Don't I look like a holly berry poster?

See the Belvedere playing tricks on y 'all. Your friend want to be like me,

never. You won't find a bitch that's even bad time. I make it hot as Las

weather. Listen up close while I take it backwards.

Okay, I guess if y 'all listen to me, it was joke.

I'm not a prostitute, but I can give you what you want. I love your braids and

your mouth full of phones. Love the way my ass go, ba -boom, ba -boom, boom.

Keep your eyes on my ba -boom, ba -boom, boom.

And think you can handle this, ba -boom, ba -boom, boom.

Take my song off and my ass open.

Cut the lights on so you see what I can do. Is it worth it? Let me work it.

I put my thing down, flip it and reverse it.

It's your permit if it's why I need it.

It's your permit if it's why I need it. If you got a big, let me search it. To

find out how hard I gotta work it.

It's your permit if it's why I need it.

It's your permit if it's why I need it.

I like the way you work.