All language subtitles for gua-magnumpi.1980.s01e08-1080p

Tell Sir Algernon
to hire someone else.

Sir Algernon is the dog.

The what?

(BARKS)

Have you off-loaded
my dog yet?

Sir Algernon Farnsworth.

You're gonna go in
and get my dog.

Real simple, real fast.

MAN: Hey, you!

Stop those men!

Stop those men!

HIGGINS: /f that dog
is worth something,

it has to be intrinsic
to the dog itself.

Maybe he has some kind
of peculiar talent.

You couldn't
pull a simple ABC job
like snatching a pooch.

We use finesse,
not brute force.

We don't need an old mustache
telling us how to do our jobs.

(BARKING)

That stinking dog.

Magnum!

STEVE: Come on!
Hurry up, will ya?

| can't believe this.

Now this old mustache,
as you put it,

is gonna show you
how it's done.

We got the gas tank!
Come on!

VICTOR: Come on! Let's go!

(SHIP HORN BLOWING)

WOMAN ON PA:
All holiday cruise passengers
bound for Tahiti,

our Pacific Princess
luxury liner
will open for boarding

at Pier 171 in five minutes.

VICTOR: All right.
Pull her right over here.

MITCH: No, no, no.
We can't park here.

Hey, this is fine.
It's fine.

This is a yellow zone.

The yellow zone?

We're here to pull a snatch
and you're worried
about yellow zones?

It won't do us any good
to draw attention
by parking illegally.

Now, maybe you're right.
Maybe we should've
come out on a bus

like some tourists
with the flowered shirts.

Would you get going?

All right,
all right.

Come on, Mitch.

Hey, you're gonna
have to move this vehicle.

It's all right.
I'm here
to pick someone up.

Look, this is a yellow zone.
You gotta move out.

Officer, I'm here
to pick up
Mama DiGorgio.

My nephew,
he went to find her.

She has a little trouble
getting around
on the crutches.

Sorry.
We all got our problems,

but you're gonna
have to move this car.

Hey, a nephew like mine
you've never seen.

He always promised
his Aunt Gina, Uncle Vic...

That's me, Uncle Vic.

He said, "Someday
I'm gonna put you on a boat
and send you to Hawaii."

I'm sorry, sir,
but either
you move this car

or I'm gonna have to
call the tow truck.

Hey, that's some boy,
my nephew.

Well, of course...

If she's on crutches...

(BIRDS TWITTERING)

(DOG BARKS)

WOMAN ON PA:
Captain Makua, report to
the Pier 9 loading gate.

Captain Makua...
Okay, guys. Here he is.

(BARKS)

That is
Sir Algernon Farnsworth?
(CHUCKLES)

(ALGIE BARKING)

(ALGIE GROWLING)

We should have
started earlier.

Or | should have canceled
the afternoon meeting.

The board meeting
should be over by 5:00,
Mrs. Marston.

You'll be able to see
Sir Algernon
immediately afterward.

(SIGHS) | barely have time
to say hello to him,

let alone
make him feel welcome.

Thank you.
Okay. Thanks, guys.

Oh! Excuse me.

Excuse me.

I'm Mrs. Marston.

Have you off-loaded
my dog yet?

Sir Algernon Farnsworth.

Yeah,
the animal control people
just took him to the shelter.

(CHUCKLES) What in the world
are you talking about?

| would never allow my Algie
to stay at a dog pound.

He's staying at
the Kaleawana Barn and Kennel
during quarantine.

They just took him
a minute ago.
Hey, there they are.

MAN: Hey, you!

GLORIA: Algie!

Stop those men!
Stop those men!

(ALGIE BARKING)

Come on!
Let's get out of here!

Algie!

(BARKING CONTINUES)

Oh, my baby.

(ALGIE WHIMPERING)

Algie. Aww.

VICTOR: Where is he?

We had a little trouble.

Feds or local?

STEVE: Neither.
That lady, Mrs. Marston.

VICTOR: You mean you...
You come back without the dog
because of some old broad?

She was running
across the dock
screaming bloody murder.

VICTOR:
You're lucky she didn't have
the rest of the girls

from the mahjong club.

Maybe you wouldn't
have gotten out alive.

MITCH: Don't worry.
We'll get the dog.

I'm not worried.

You guys are gonna
have to answer to Dominic
if you lose that dog.

MAGNUM: Higgins,
what's so important
about a dog?

Magnum, we are
talking about the pet

of a very important
and highly-regarded member
of the King Kamehameha Club.

We're talking
about a dog.

No offense, guys.

(BARKING)

Tell Sir Algernon
to hire someone else.

Sir Algernon is the dog.
Mrs. Marston is your client.

My what?

| guaranteed your services.

Higgins, don't you think
you should have
checked with me first?

Magnum,

| would consider it
a personal favor

if you would
take on this matter.

Oh.

Why didn't you tell me that
in the first place?

Tennis courts.

Impossible.

Mr. Connors and Mr. Borg
are Robin's guests
this weekend.

They'll be using the courts.

Good.

Then Jimmy can help me
with my backhand

and Bjorn can help me
with my serve.

Magnum, | can't.

Then neither can |.

(BARKING)

lam so glad
that you have agreed
to protect Algie.

Algie? | thought
his name was
Sir Algernon Farnsworth.

He prefers Algie.

He's very
down-to-earth.

| can see that.

Quite a dog.

GLORIA: One of a kind.

Obviously.

Um, sugar?

Please.

Mrs. Marston,
would you pay a ransom
for Algie?

Of course.
Money's no object
when it comes to Algie.

Well, | think you were
the intended victim

of a couple of
professional dognappers.

See, they hang out
at the docks,

see a likely candidate
and kidnap it.

But you probably
won't see or hear from
those two yo-yo's again.

Well, then hiring Magnum
would be
a waste of your money.

Of course, you do have to
keep Algie as well-protected
as possible

during the four-month
quarantine.

You said he was staying
at the Kaleawana Kennel?

Oh. | think
their security's
top-notch.

Well, I'd like to be
absolutely certain.

Well, | could run
a security check.

On a kennel?
Why not?

Nothing is too good
for Sir Algernon.

(SIGHS)

I'll phone the kennel
and tell ‘em you're coming.

No, no, don't do that.

They'd only upgrade
their security
for my inspection.

No, if someone
was going to try
and kidnap your dog,

they would probably
break-in at night.

And that's when
I'll make my inspection.

There's nothing you can do
till tonight?

Not really.

Besides, | have
a previous conference
with a couple of pros.

Right, Higgins?

(TALKING INDISTINCTLY)

Hey, blonde,
throw that thing to me,
will you, babes?

Come on!
(LAUGHING)

Hey. Hey, Steve.

Tell the truth.
You like girls?

Of course
| like girls.

Well, why don't
you come over
and look?

Because I've got
reports to fill out.

TYPING) Reports?

What is the family
coming to?

Your father and |,
may his soul
rest in peace,

we never made
no reports.

Mr. DiGorgio, if you'd done
a little paperwork,
we wouldn't be here now.

(STUTTERING)
| don't believe you.

You couldn't
pull a simple ABC job
like snatching a pooch.

You know, once,
your father and |,

you know
what we had to do?

We... J. Edgar Hoover
had this stoolie with
20 agents surrounding him.

You know
what we did?

We grabbed
an armored truck
with a turret gun.

A turret gun!

And we blew our way in.

Things aren't done
like that anymore.

We use finesse,
not brute force.

Finesse? What do you think
you are, Steve?

You think you're still captain
of that Harvard chess team?

Yale.

Yale, Harvard.

Mr. DiGorgio,
with all due respect,

we don't need
an old mustache telling us
how to do our jobs.

Maybe not, baby.

But you need somebody
to tell you something.

MITCH: Steve,
| got everything.

All right. Real good.

Mr. DiGorgio,
we get your dog tonight.

You're gonna dress up
like two Good Humor men

and go in there
and bribe the night watchman
with a popsicle?

Something like that.

Department of Health?

Yes, that's right.

I'm sorry about
the strange hour.
Thank you.

(DOGS BARKING)

But the outbreak
was only
recently discovered

when two gerbils
escaped from a cargo hold
and attacked the crew

while they were
tying up to a dock.

What?

(CHUCKLES)
It's just a little joke.

But, actually,
| have to check
all animals

that have
entered quarantine
in the last 24 hours.

You see, two dogs
from Hong Kong

have contracted a rare and
highly contagious disease.

And it usually
affects cattle.

And since
these are sheepdogs,

| think you can see
how dangerous this could be.

If it ain't one thing,
it's another.

First, the State,

Quarantine Board
pulling a surprise check,
and now you.

(BARKING CONTINUES)

The State Quarantine Board?

Got here
just before you did.

Thirty years on the job.

| never had
this kind of activity
on my shift.

Are they still in there?

Yeah.

Matter of fact,
you may have to wait
until they've finished up.

(DOGS BARKING)

Come on, get him out.
He's just a dog.

I'm tryin’!
I'm tryin’!

Hi, guys.
(BARKING CONTINUES)

Oh, we're the State
Quarantine Board.

This dog
happens to be infected
with a type of flea

that carries
bubonic plague.

We're gonna have
to isolate him
from the other dogs.

With that syringe?
Call the police.

(DOGS BARKING)

(GRUNTING)

(GROANS)

Hold it!

(DOGS BARKING)

(WHIMPERING)

(WHINING)

HIGGINS: Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

Wait a minute.
What's that?

His lunch.

There's nothing
surgically implanted
under the skin,

nothing in his teeth,
nothing in the collar.

If that dog
is worth something,

it has to be intrinsic
to the dog itself.

Well, maybe he has
some kind of
peculiar talent.

Such as what?
Lifting his leg?

Well, police do train dogs
to sniff out
explosives or drugs.

Those are highly-trained,
extremely
intelligent breeds.

Dogs such as Apollo and Zeus,
not mongrels.

Well, | will have you know
that that mongrel
stuck with me last night,

which is more than
those two would ever do.

| rest my case.

(INTERCOM BUZZES)

Identify yourself.

Do what?

T.C., shag it.

Shag it?

Yeah,
security password.

HIGGINS:
Magnum, you're committing
a breach of security.

You can't do this.

| don't know
what you're up to,
Magnum,

but whatever it is,
it's not going to work.
Not this time.

Wanna bet?
Yes. Whatever it is you want.

The car for a month,
the tennis courts for a year,
the wine cellar.

Whatever it is,
it's still not
going to work.

MAGNUM:
There are times
when one human being

really shouldn't
take advantage of another,

but this wasn't one of them.

Look, why can't
we build it here?

The area's
obviously being used

by people
coming from the main house
down to the tennis courts.

The dog can't make contact
with more than
two or three people.

(LAUGHING)
Well, that's gonna
be impossible.

| mean, people
roam around here like it was
the Honolulu International...

| didn't
make up the rules.

All right, men.
Put it wherever
she wants it.

Stop.
Whatever you're doing,
stop it.

Hi, Higgins.

Don't "Hi, Higgins" me.

Just get you and
your juvenile delinquents
out of here.

Juvenile delinquents?

Man, those are some
of the best athletes
on my team.

And now I'm teaching them
how to work for a living.

Now, those skilled laborers
are gonna earn
$200 building the run.

Run?
SHARON: You must be Higgins.

I'm Sharon Karns.

State Board of Agriculture
and Animal Regulations.

How do you do?
What run?

Dog run.

Dog run?

Yeah.
Hi, Sharon, how you doing?

T.C.: Hi, Thomas.
Hi, guys.

Magnum, you didn't
mention a tidal pool.

Naturally,
you'll have to
make sure

Sir Algernon Farnsworth
does not enter the ocean.

Naturally.

No. Oh, no.

Excuse me.

| told you not to bet.

Sure.

It doesn't matter.
That animal
cannot stay here.

T.C., build it
wherever she wants.

Right on.

Higgins?

No!

No, no, no!

Look, | cannot protect a dog
that is 20 miles away in
a kennel with poor security.

How did you manage
to arrange this, Magnum?

Hawaii has very strict
quarantine laws.

Well, it wasn't easy.
Mrs. Marston had to
pull a lot of strings.

Now, all we have to do
is make a few concessions
and abide by the rules.

No, we don't,
since that dog
is not going to stay here.

Okay. Mrs. Marston
went through a lot of trouble
to arrange this,

but | guess she'll understand
when you explain it to her.

How long?
A year.

A year? The quarantine period
is only four months.

Oh, Algie'll only be here
a week or so

till | track down
whoever's after him.

But | want the tennis courts
for a year.

That was one of the bets
you offered, wasn't it?

MAGNUM:
Don't feel sorry for Higgins,
he never totally loses.

When Sharon and !
left to get Sir Farnsworth
at the kennel,

the Ferrari
had mysteriously disappeared.

So | took the Jimmy
and wondered
what could go wrong next.

MITCH: | really think
this is the wrong way
to go about this.

Look, we're not
taking a vote.

Now, you guys,
you're gonna go in
and get my dog.

Real simple,
real fast.
In and out.

Anybody gets in your way,
bing, bang, boom.

It's broad daylight.

The middle of the night
didn't exactly
work like a charm.

Now, believe me,
no one will be ready
for you guys

walking through
that front door at noon.

That's how
your old man and |
hit the City National.

(SHOUTING) What do you think
put you through Harvard?

Yale.

(ALGIE BARKING)
Yale.

Hey, that's your dog.

Please keep him
on a shorter leash.

Sharon, are you afraid
of this dog?

I'm not cynophobic.

| just don't like
animals sniffing at me.

Cynophobic?

Who's the guy
and the dame?

That's the guy
from last night.

Sharon, if you're
afraid of the dog,
just say so.

I'm not afraid
of the dog.

That would be silly,
wouldn't it?

| mean, to put a dog
in custody of someone
afraid of it.

No. If you're afraid,
you're afraid.

There's nothing
to be ashamed of.

But I'm not afraid.

Okay.

You're not afraid.

(BARKING)

Hop. Hop.

Hey, they're making it
easy for us.

We'll take the dog
on the road.

On the road?
We don't even
have a plan.

We don't need a plan.
We got this.

(GROWLING)

Come on, Algie.
(ENGINE STARTS)

Move it!

(ENGINE STARTS)

Sir Farnsworth,
come here.

Sir Farnsworth.

Come here.

Come here. Stay.

Damn.

What?

Oh, nothing.

How you doing,
Sir Farnsworth?

Why are we stopping?

We need gas.

The tank's full.

Oh, the gauge sticks.

(BELL DINGS)

I'll be right back.
You just tell the attendant
to fill it up.

And don't leave Algie.

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

(MEN TALKING INDISTINCTLY))

(GROWLS)

(COIN CLATTERS, BELL DINGS)

(PHONE RINGING)

Hello? Island Hoppers.

T.C., it's Magnum.

Aha! Hey, Thomas,
my kids got their $200,

but I'm still short
$163.59.

Yeah, look, when | get paid
by Mrs. Marston,
you'll get paid.

I'm at a gas station
about five miles north
of Chinaman's Hat

on my way to Robin's.
How long would it take you
to get here?

(CHUCKLES)
Twenty minutes if | wanted to,
which | don't.

That is unless
you got my $163.59.

Look, T.C., | think
I'm being followed

by a black sedan
with rental plates.

Then why don't you hire
a real private investigator?

Or better yet,
why don't
you call the cops?

And tell them what?

I'm being followed
by three guys
who are after a dog?

No, | gotta let them
make a move first.

I'd just like to know
| had a little high cover.
That's all.

Oh, yeah?
And who's gonna pay
for this high cover?

Excuse me, miss.
My name's Reardon.
I'm with 5-0.

If you could step right over
to our surveillance unit
and bring the dog along.

5-0?

We were informed that
someone's been trying to
kidnap Sir Farnsworth and...

(BARKING)

Well, we've been assigned
as an undercover escort.

(GRUNTS)

Oh, would you mind
bringing the dog along,
please?

Me?

Well, Magnum will be
back in a minute.

He'll do it.

What the hell's
going on here?
Let's go.

Well, you get the dog.

I'll get that
stinking dog.

Come on, you lousy...
Magnum!

Magnum!
Just put it on my bill, okay?

T.C.: No, | can't.
‘Cause | ain't coming.

Magnum, help!

Thomas?

STEVE: Come on!
Hurry up, will ya?

Excuse me.
(GROANS)

Hey, hey. What the hell?
What are you doing?

Hey, who...

(SCREAMS)

(GROANS)

| can't believe this!

(ENGINE STARTING)

(BARKING)

(TIRES SQUEALING)

Come on! Come on,
you old lollipops!

(TIRES SQUEALING)

What's going on?

They're the ones
after Algie.

They said
they were from 5-0.

And you believed them?

Why not?

You didn't give them
a chance to say anything.

Right.

College boys!

Now this old mustache,
as you put it,

is gonna show you
how it's done.

(ALGIE WHINING)

(GRUMBLES)
If you guys had used
that piece back there,

we'd be making tracks
with that dog right now.

And we'd have
a dozen witnesses
to ID us afterwards.

VICTOR:
Well, there ain't gonna be
no witnesses now.

So be a good boy
and pull that piece
and get ready to use it.

Whoever he is,
he's one hell
of a driver.

Why doesn't that
make me feel better?

Oh, don't worry.
He can't keep it up.

STEVE: Now where's he going?

MAGNUM: Hang on.
I'm gonna lose ‘em.

MITCH:
You can't go in there.

VICTOR: Yeah?
Well, who's gonna stop me?

(TIRES SQUEALING)

STEVE: Look out!

That guy's crazy.

He's crazy?

MAGNUM: He'll never
follow us in here.

Yeah. We'll be okay now.

SHARON: If we ever
find our way out of here.

VICTOR:
I'm gonna get that mutt
if it's the last thing | do.

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

You're not stopping?

|... I've got to.
We're out of gas.

| thought you were lying
about the needle being stuck
and needing gas.

| was lying about
the needle being stuck
and needing gas,

but they must have
shot holes in the tank.

(BLACK SEDAN ENGINE REVVING)

Magnum, be...
Shh.

(BLACK SEDAN ENGINE REVVING)

They're stuck.

VICTOR: Damn it!

STEVE:
| can't even get out.

Turn the motor off!

STEVE: Hey.

Dummy!

I'm sorry.
Really.

That's okay, Sharon.

You've just gotta learn
to trust people. That's all.
Right, Algie?

(GROWLS)

(ALGIE BARKING)

(CHUCKLES)

(BARKING CONTINUES)

Hey, shh.

(BARKING CONTINUES)

They're stuck too.

Come on!

My luck is still with me.

(MONKEYS CHATTERING)

(FLIES BUZZING)

VICTOR: (LAUGHING)
You son of a gun!

On the bull's eye!
We got the gas tank!

Come on. Come on.
Let's go.

There's not
much more road.

Who cares
about the road?

What are we
gonna do here?

Set up a picnic basket?

Come on!
Move it, will ya?
Move it!

Hold it, hold it,
hold it.

(GROANS)

You all right?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Well, let me see.

No, I'm... I'm fine.

(BARKING)

Hi, guys.

You're trespassing.

I've got the right
to shoot trespassers.

Isn't that right,
Manu?

| just give it
to you.

We're not trespassing.
We're being chased.

KONO: Chased?

Yes. Besides...

The banana plantations
reverted back
to the government

when the leases
ran out.

So we can't be
trespassing.

Especially since
| work for the people...

Me.

She's working for me.
We got a couple guys
from 5-0 on our tail.

| thought you said
they weren't from 5-0.

Well, not all of them.

The Justice Department
always sends
a couple of local cops

with one of their
Federal agents.

You got the Feds after you?
No.

Yes. We came up here
in a pickup truck
with a load of seedlings.

We were looking for
a place to find our patch
when they jumped us.

Seedlings?

See, we didn't realize
that you guys were already
up here. I'm sorry.

Oh, that's okay.

How far is the highway
from here, bro?

Tom!
MANU: About a mile down.

Oh, good. Thank you. What?
Tom.

This is cannabis.
Grass!

Yes. Yes, | know it is.

Your stuff
looks much healthier
than ours anyway.

Oh, you should try
our Puna buzz, bro.

MAGNUM: Hey, right.

That's good stuff.

Let's go. Let's go!

VICTOR:
Come on, college boys.

You're moving like
you're older than | am,
for crying out loud.

MITCH:
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

(FOLIAGE RUSTLING)

Oh!
(BARKS)

(LAUGHS)

Oh, come on.
Yeah, just a minute.

| want to try and get a fix
on exactly where we are

so | can let them know
about their little patch.

(GUNSHOTS)
Let's go.

(BIRDS CHIRPING LOUDLY)

Who the hell are they?

They gotta be
moonshiners.

There's gotta be
a still around here
somewhere.

They're growing grass.
We've stumbled
into their patch.

Grass?

Why would anybody
be growing grass
in a banana patch?

| got it in the leg.

Come on,
come on, come on.
We can't stay here.

For once,
you're right.

Listen, give me his piece.

Get your fraternity brother
out of here, and I'll cover.

(GUNSHOTS CONTINUE)

(BARKING)

(GUNSHOTS CONTINUE)

Come on, Algie.
(WHIMPERS)

(BARKING)

| just need a minute
to catch my breath.
(PANTING)

(PANTING) Okay.

MITCH: Hey, I've never seen
anything like this guy.
He's nuts.

STEVE:
The guy's crazy.

He thinks
he's Al Capone.

(WAVES CRASHING)

(BARKING)

(CRYING)

(PANTING)

It's okay, fella.
Nobody's gonna hurt you.

You really think
he understands you
when you say that?

Well, sure.

Maybe not every word,
but he senses my meaning.

That's nonsense.

Dogs are strictly
stimuli motivated.

You slap him,
he's punished.

You pet him, he's rewarded.

He can't understand words
like, "No one's
gonna hurt you, boy."

Oh, look, just 'cause
you're afraid of dogs...

I'm not afraid of dogs.

(SOBBING)

I'm sorry.

No, it's all right.

It's just that I'm confused,
tired, scared, and l...

And?

And afraid of dogs.

Algie and |
kind of had that
figured out.

It's nothing
to be ashamed of.

How you doing?
All right. I'm all right.

What do you think?

They gotta be there.

After | got my master's
in marine biology,

| came to Hawaii
looking for a job
working with marine mammals.

Whales, dolphins,
seals.

But they don't
start you out there.

You have to put in
a year or so working with
dogs, cats, birds

until there's an opening
in the marine
maintenance section.

If they knew
that | was afraid of dogs,
they'd let me go.

And you wouldn't
have a chance
to save the whales.

Mmm-hmm.
Well, don't worry.

Your secret's safe with us.
Right, Algie?

(BARKS)

Thanks, Algie.

MAGNUM: Come on, Algie.
We've got company.

Come on, Algie.
Come on!

(BARKING)

Get Algie, will ya?
And stay there.

(BARKING)

Come on, let's go.

Hold it. Hold it.

What? What now?

| gotta reload.

Here.
Do | have to do everything?

Will you earn your living?
Load them up!

Listen to me.
Either we go in there
and get that dog

or we get
the hell out of here.

Now relax, will you?

Look, we're...
We're in the middle
of nowhere.

They got nowhere to go,

but the ocean
and the sharks.

Now we can make a plan.

Now you want to
make a plan.

And my leg's still bleeding.

VICTOR: A little buckshot
never hurt anybody.

Hey, you want to
hear about blood?

1934, your father
and | com...

No more! No more stories
about the old days, huh?

All right! All right!

Give me my piece.

Now we're gonna go down
that pier
and get that rotten dog,

even if we have to
blast those two
out of that shack!

You got it?
| got it.

STEVE: You gonna be able
to make it?

Yeah, | can.
It's just a flesh wound.
I'll be okay.

Aha!

You see?

Looks like
the college kid grew up.

Let's go.

(DOOR KNOB RATTLING)

(ALGIE GROWLING)

(GROWLING CONTINUES)

(WOOD CREAKING)

(BARKING)

Mitch, go around the back!

(BARKING)

SHARON: Come on!

(WAVES CRASHING ROUGHLY)

(ALGIE BARKS)

(SHUSHING)

(BARKING)

(SHUSHING)

(BARKING STOPS)

VICTOR:
Look, whoever you are,
all | want is my dog.

Your dog?

He was stolen from me.

His rightful
and legal owner.

Now what do you say?

Look, you got
nowhere to go.
You're trapped.

I'll make a deal.

You two for my dog.

| ain't got all day.

(WHIMPERS)
(BARKING)

(WHIMPERS)

(HELICOPTER APPROACHING)

(SCOFFS)
Man, | don't believe it.

(ALGIE CONTINUES BARKING)

Come on, Algie. Come on.
Go on.

(WHIMPERING)

Come on, Algie.
Go on, Algie.

Go. Go.
Hey, Algie.

Algie, | got ya. Come on.
(WHIMPERING)

That's it.
Good boy.

Yet some things
never change.

(GUNSHOTS)

T.C.:
Who's gonna pay for that?

MAGNUM:
Put it on my bill.

(T.C. LAUGHS)

| don't believe it!

See what | mean?
It's not that easy
to get that damn dog.

Enough. Enough.

The entire episode
is absurd.

Yeah, you got that right.
(CHUCKLES)

But true,
right, T.C.?

Oh, yeah.
Sure is.

And | got
450 bucks worth
of bullet holes

in my bird
to prove it.

But, | don't
believe you,
either of you.

And neither
will Mr. Masters

when | tell him
you lost his favorite
pickup truck

in a banana field.

Oh, no, no.
It ain't lost.
| spotted it.

See, that's how | found him.
You see, | was in my bird...

Please, not again.

Higgins, we couldn't
possibly have even
invented this story.

And besides,
it was all started
with your friend

Mrs. Marston,
remember?

Assuming that
you are telling the truth,
and it's a huge assumption,

what could possibly
make this dog
worth all that trouble?

| don't Know!

But | think
| have a way
of finding out.

T.C., I'm gonna
call Rick.

Mmm-hmm.
As long as
you don't call me.

MAGNUM:
Rick wasn't overly
enthusiastic about my plan.

He thought
it had some holes in it,

and he was afraid
they would end up in him.

| told him
that was ridiculous.

(ENGINE STARTING)

(HORN HONKING)

What's your problem?
What, are you coconuts
or what?

(TIRES SCREECHING)

Whoa! What is this?

Just follow that car.

You know, unless
there's a black market for
chlorine and skimmers,

you're just
wasting your time.

What were you doing
on the estate?

| was reroofing
the garage.

Come on,
what do you think
| was doing?

| was cleaning the pool.

You don't clean tidal pools,
and that's all they've got.

Oh, no kidding? I...
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

| thought there was
something funny.

You know, you'd be surprised
what you find
in people's filters.

You know, one time | found
a Chicago Cubs glove and
another time | found this...

Yeah, right.
| get your drift.

Just keep on driving.

(BARKING)

T.C.: $163.59 for materials.

$450 for bullet holes.

$200 for
the trip there.

$200 more
for this trip.

Man, that comes
to a grand total
of $1,013.59.

And that ain't
including tax.

That's it.
Take us down.

But not close enough
for them to hear.

Hey, man, if | land
out of hearing range,

it'll take you about
15 minutes to get there

and Rick could be
in big trouble by then.

Could you
split the difference?

You got it,
good buddy.

STEVE: Okay, Mr. Pool Man,
just pull it right up there.

Get out.

Come on, get out!

Let's go.

Let's go, move.

Okay, okay.
I'm going.

Come on, come on.

Steve, you get the dog?

RICK: Victor DiGorgio,
| thought you died
in the pen years ago.

Who's the mouth?
Orville.

Orville?
Yeah, Orville from Flatbush.

| used to do
some running for
High Shoes Leibel.

They called me "Little O."
You remember, Mr. D.

No. Where's my dog?

STEVE:
He's in the back.

Well, did you
get the number?

Not yet.

Oh, what the hell
are you waiting for?

Bring him out
and check the tattoo.

You tattooed a dog?
| love it.
That's great...

Watch the hands!

Bring him out!

Oh, I'd...
I'd really prefer it
if you did, Mr. DiGorgio.

Me?
Are you crazy?

That dog'll
tear me apart.

But he's your dog.

Look, you know that
and | know that,
but that dog don't know it.

He never forgave me
for leaving him,
when | got sent up.

He holds a grudge
like nobody
you ever met.

We're talking about
a dog.

VICTOR: All right!
He's small, but he's mean!

He's got a memory
like a bull elephant!

You bring him out!

(SIGHS)

Hey, don't even look at me.
I've had it with that animal.

You, Orville.
Call him out.

Nice and easy.

(CHUCKLES)
Tattooing a dog.
That's great, Mr. D.

Come on.
Come on, Orville.

Victor DiGorgio.
Boy, | really remember him
from Flatbush.

| really do.
Yeah. Mmm-hmm.

You could
come out now, Algie.
It's all right.

HIGGINS: Now, lads!

(GROWLING)

Get him off!
Get him off!

Hold it!

Hold it!

(GROANS)

(CHUCKLES)
You really gotta get
into condition, Orville.

(DOGS SNARLING)

I'm too old for this.

(BARKING)

It's just a bunch of numbers.

HIGGINS: Well, hardly
just a bunch of numbers.

That tattoo is the call number
to a coded Swiss bank account.

According to the FBI,
it contained
four million dollars.

Mob money DiGorgio was holding
when he was sent to prison.

And anyone with that number
can just get into the account?

Yeah.
No names, no signatures.

It's a favorite
of businessmen.
And the mob.

But...

But how did Mrs. Marston
end up with a dog
that belonged to a mobster?

Well, see, after Vic
was sentenced,

he left the dog
in the care
of his girlfriend.

She was a hairdresser.

Well, he didn't tell her
about the tattoo,

but he just said
don't let the dog
out of her sight.

Well, they had a little fight,
see, and to spite him,

she gave the dog away
to a customer.

Mrs. Marston.

We're going to miss you
around here, Sir Algernon.

SHARON:
Algie's not leaving.

(BARKS)

He's not?

| mean, he's not?

Getting space
in the Kaleawana Kennel
is very difficult.

It sometimes takes months.

By then, Algie's
quarantine period
will be over.

Mrs. Marston thought,
as long as you already
have the facilities,

well, he could stay here.

It's either that
or the animal shelter.

And Mrs. Marston
wouldn't be very happy
if he went there.

Of course,
if he's too much bother...

Oh, Apollo and Zeus
will have to make
a few sacrifices,

but I'm sure
they won't mind.

Not for someone
very, very special like
Sir Algernon Farnsworth.

Would they, Higgins?

Of course not.

(DOGS WHIMPERING)

(PANTING)

Sorry, lads.

Cheer up, Higgins.
They'll forgive you

someday.

Oh, they quite understand.

Believe me, Magnum,
I've explained to them
precisely

who's responsible
for their incarceration.

(DOGS WHIMPERING)

(DOGS GROWLING)