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1
00:00:01,235 --> 00:00:02,036
Previously on...
2
00:00:02,103 --> 00:00:03,003
Excuse me.
3
00:00:03,071 --> 00:00:04,338
Do you know the difference
4
00:00:04,405 --> 00:00:07,541
between organic beef
and grass-fed beef?
5
00:00:07,608 --> 00:00:09,043
She was totally hitting on you.
6
00:00:09,110 --> 00:00:10,544
You should
ask her out.
7
00:00:10,611 --> 00:00:12,613
Hey, Zoey, you want
to on a date with me?!
8
00:00:12,680 --> 00:00:14,148
Sure!
9
00:00:14,215 --> 00:00:16,817
When I was in high school,
I met this girl named Bridget.
10
00:00:16,884 --> 00:00:18,819
You're still in love
with her, aren't you?
11
00:00:18,886 --> 00:00:20,254
See, look. No wedding ring.
12
00:00:20,321 --> 00:00:22,356
Hmm, I noticed
the bright white tan line.
13
00:00:22,423 --> 00:00:24,192
No worries. I gave it to Alan.
14
00:00:24,258 --> 00:00:27,061
Oh... very valuable.
15
00:00:27,128 --> 00:00:28,829
(chuckles)
16
00:00:28,896 --> 00:00:30,698
You seem like
a really sweet guy,
17
00:00:30,764 --> 00:00:34,368
but I think you're still kind
of married to your Bridget.
18
00:00:34,435 --> 00:00:37,338
Face it, you're not ready
to be dating yet.
19
00:00:38,739 --> 00:00:40,874
You want your ring back?
20
00:00:40,941 --> 00:00:41,942
Yeah.
21
00:00:42,009 --> 00:00:43,411
I don't need this anymore.
22
00:00:43,477 --> 00:00:44,812
You sure?
23
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:46,980
I'm positive.
24
00:00:48,216 --> 00:00:50,284
My precious! My precious!
25
00:00:53,387 --> 00:00:55,923
My precious! My precious!
26
00:00:58,192 --> 00:01:00,294
My precious!
27
00:01:05,133 --> 00:01:07,101
Mind if I take this?
28
00:01:07,168 --> 00:01:09,002
Oh, uh, no--
somebody's sitting there.
29
00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:11,172
Well, where are they?
30
00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:12,673
They're not here yet.
31
00:01:12,740 --> 00:01:14,842
Well, I'm here
and I need a chair.
32
00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:16,377
No, uh...
33
00:01:16,444 --> 00:01:18,712
honestly, I have a girl coming.
34
00:01:18,779 --> 00:01:21,249
Well, when she gets here,
I'll give it back to her.
35
00:01:21,315 --> 00:01:24,385
See, I don't believe that.
36
00:01:26,987 --> 00:01:29,022
You calling me a liar?
37
00:01:29,089 --> 00:01:33,294
No, but I've been burnt before.
38
00:01:33,361 --> 00:01:35,896
I'm taking this chair.
39
00:01:35,963 --> 00:01:37,331
No, you're not.
40
00:01:37,398 --> 00:01:39,900
Yes, I am. Let go!
41
00:01:39,967 --> 00:01:41,435
You let go
of the chair.
42
00:01:41,502 --> 00:01:42,936
I had the chair before
you even came into the place.
43
00:01:43,003 --> 00:01:44,338
It's mine now!
It's my chair now!
44
00:01:44,405 --> 00:01:46,307
Walden, is everything all right?
45
00:01:46,374 --> 00:01:48,209
Ha! She's here.
Now back off!
46
00:01:50,178 --> 00:01:51,379
What was that all about?
47
00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:53,381
It was an attempt
at a chairjacking.
48
00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:56,083
Here, I get you a tea.
49
00:01:56,150 --> 00:01:58,252
Thank you.
I'm sorry I'm late.
50
00:01:58,319 --> 00:02:00,488
I'm trying to get my daughter
into Bellwood Academy.
51
00:02:00,554 --> 00:02:02,290
It's a nightmare.
52
00:02:02,356 --> 00:02:05,092
She tests well, but she did
not give a good interview.
53
00:02:05,159 --> 00:02:06,227
How old is
your daughter again?
54
00:02:06,294 --> 00:02:07,961
Five.
55
00:02:08,028 --> 00:02:11,131
And Bellwood Academy is a...?
Kindergarten.
56
00:02:11,199 --> 00:02:14,268
Wow, when I was five,
I got kicked out of preschool
57
00:02:14,335 --> 00:02:15,336
for biting my teacher.
58
00:02:15,403 --> 00:02:16,804
Why did you bite her?
59
00:02:16,870 --> 00:02:18,439
She tried to steal my chair.
60
00:02:20,308 --> 00:02:21,875
Yeah, you heard me! I bit her!
61
00:02:23,377 --> 00:02:24,745
She had to get a shot!
62
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:28,349
Take it easy, okay?
63
00:02:29,950 --> 00:02:31,051
So I was rather surprised
64
00:02:31,118 --> 00:02:32,886
to hear from you.
What's up?
65
00:02:32,953 --> 00:02:35,923
I was thinking a lot about what
you said about not wanting
66
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:39,293
to date me while I was
still, you know,
67
00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:40,994
emotionally attached
to my ex-wife.
68
00:02:41,061 --> 00:02:43,931
I said you were still
hopelessly in love with her.
69
00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:46,467
Potato, Po-tah-to.
70
00:02:46,534 --> 00:02:48,168
The point is you were right.
71
00:02:48,236 --> 00:02:50,304
I wasn't ready to start
dating, but I am now.
72
00:02:50,371 --> 00:02:53,106
A whole week later.
73
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,008
I understand your skepticism.
74
00:02:55,075 --> 00:02:57,811
Which is why I want you to
witness what I'm about to do.
75
00:02:57,878 --> 00:02:59,813
These...
76
00:02:59,880 --> 00:03:03,284
are my final divorce papers.
77
00:03:03,351 --> 00:03:07,120
And once I sign them, my
marriage will be over forever.
78
00:03:08,489 --> 00:03:11,492
I was hoping that you
and I could start fresh.
79
00:03:11,559 --> 00:03:14,462
Nothing like starting off
a new relationship
80
00:03:14,528 --> 00:03:16,297
on the ashes of the old one.
81
00:03:16,364 --> 00:03:18,799
That's what I was thinking.
82
00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:23,136
Oh, uh, you got a pen?
83
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:25,506
Uh, I don't think I do.
84
00:03:25,573 --> 00:03:27,040
Okay.
85
00:03:27,107 --> 00:03:28,942
Uh, does anybody got a pen
I can borrow?
86
00:03:30,110 --> 00:03:32,045
Anyone? Nobody?
87
00:03:32,112 --> 00:03:33,046
Excuse me.
88
00:03:33,113 --> 00:03:33,981
Do you got a pen?
89
00:03:34,047 --> 00:03:35,048
Sorry.
90
00:03:35,115 --> 00:03:37,985
It's unbelievable.
91
00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:39,453
(clears throat)
92
00:03:41,021 --> 00:03:43,924
Oh, man.
93
00:03:43,991 --> 00:03:45,993
Can I please borrow your pen?
94
00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:49,463
I'm sorry, someone's using it.
95
00:03:49,530 --> 00:03:50,898
Who?
96
00:03:50,964 --> 00:03:54,835
They're not here yet.
97
00:03:54,902 --> 00:03:57,471
I will give you a hundred
dollars to borrow that pen.
98
00:03:57,538 --> 00:03:59,440
(patrons clamoring)
99
00:04:01,309 --> 00:04:04,211
* Men, men, men, men, manly men,
men, men *
100
00:04:04,278 --> 00:04:07,381
* Men, men, men, men,
manly men, men, men *
* Ooh
101
00:04:07,448 --> 00:04:10,484
* Men, men, men, men,
manly men *
* Ooh
* Ooh
102
00:04:10,551 --> 00:04:12,853
* Ooh-ooh-ooh,
ooh-ohh, ooh-ooh... *
103
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:15,323
* Men, men, men, men, manly men,
men, men *
104
00:04:15,389 --> 00:04:18,859
* Ooh
* Men, men, men, men, manly men,
men, men *
105
00:04:18,926 --> 00:04:22,029
* Ah.
* Men.
* Men.
106
00:04:32,873 --> 00:04:36,444
(British accent):
Jolly good sunset, eh, what?
107
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:38,679
Excuse me?
108
00:04:38,746 --> 00:04:40,080
(accent continues):
I like the way you talk,
109
00:04:40,147 --> 00:04:43,050
so I thought
I'd give it a go.
110
00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:45,753
Well, no one says "jolly good"
unless they're appearing in
111
00:04:45,819 --> 00:04:47,355
a revival of Oliver.
112
00:04:47,421 --> 00:04:50,991
Right, right, right, right,
right, right.
113
00:04:51,058 --> 00:04:53,060
Please, sir,
may I have a kiss?
114
00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:55,028
(chuckles)
Stop it!
115
00:04:55,095 --> 00:04:57,130
(normal voice):
No, seriously, I want a kiss.
116
00:04:58,799 --> 00:04:59,800
All right.
117
00:05:02,235 --> 00:05:05,439
Mm. So...
Hmm?
118
00:05:05,506 --> 00:05:07,307
would you like to stay
for dinner tonight?
119
00:05:07,375 --> 00:05:09,943
Oh, I'd love to, but I have
to pick up my daughter.
120
00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:11,211
Yeah?
Mm-hmm.
121
00:05:11,278 --> 00:05:13,313
How about dinner
this weekend?
Sure.
122
00:05:13,381 --> 00:05:15,949
Great.
You like Mexican food?
123
00:05:16,016 --> 00:05:17,217
I do.
124
00:05:17,284 --> 00:05:18,752
Ooh, terrific.
125
00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:20,320
So we'll go to Guadalajara.
126
00:05:20,388 --> 00:05:22,155
Oh, that a new
restaurant?
127
00:05:22,222 --> 00:05:24,458
No, it's an old city in Mexico.
128
00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:27,160
You want to go to
Mexico for dinner?
129
00:05:27,227 --> 00:05:29,763
Yep. We'll take my plane.
130
00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:31,064
I'll have you back
by midnight.
131
00:05:31,131 --> 00:05:33,200
So, hang on--
you-you don't own a pen,
132
00:05:33,266 --> 00:05:34,968
but you own a plane?
133
00:05:35,035 --> 00:05:36,370
Yeah, you can
always borrow a pen.
134
00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:37,771
Try to borrow a plane.
135
00:05:39,272 --> 00:05:40,307
So...
Mm?
136
00:05:40,374 --> 00:05:41,809
what do you say?
137
00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:45,746
Hmm... Let me see if
I can get a sitter.
138
00:05:45,813 --> 00:05:47,080
Oh!
139
00:05:47,147 --> 00:05:48,348
Yay!
140
00:05:48,416 --> 00:05:50,050
Mm-hmm.
You know, I think
we should
141
00:05:50,117 --> 00:05:52,152
start making plans
for Christmas.
142
00:05:52,219 --> 00:05:56,056
We can go surfing in Fiji,
skiing in the Alps,
143
00:05:56,123 --> 00:05:57,290
making out in Malibu.
144
00:05:57,357 --> 00:06:00,127
Yes, now, Walden,
let's be very clear:
145
00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:02,430
You are a sweet and
wonderful guy,
146
00:06:02,496 --> 00:06:04,264
but you've just come out
147
00:06:04,331 --> 00:06:06,033
of a very long-term
relationship,
Sweet and wonderful.
148
00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:07,868
so you're clearly on
the rebound.
149
00:06:07,935 --> 00:06:09,336
Uh-huh. So?
150
00:06:09,403 --> 00:06:11,004
Yes. So I don't know
151
00:06:11,071 --> 00:06:13,140
if we should be making
Christmas plans just yet.
152
00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:14,475
Okay.
Hmm?
153
00:06:14,542 --> 00:06:18,111
Fine.
We'll slow things down.
154
00:06:18,178 --> 00:06:19,179
Good.
155
00:06:19,246 --> 00:06:20,347
Forget Christmas.
156
00:06:20,414 --> 00:06:22,082
Thank you.
157
00:06:22,149 --> 00:06:23,383
You'll be my Valentine,
though, right?
158
00:06:23,451 --> 00:06:24,785
Oh, my God.
159
00:06:24,852 --> 00:06:27,220
You're like no man
I've ever met.
160
00:06:27,287 --> 00:06:28,956
Mmm! A bit of an
odd bloke, eh, what?
161
00:06:29,022 --> 00:06:30,123
Oh, God, stop it.
162
00:06:30,190 --> 00:06:31,925
Nudge, nudge, wink, wink,
say no more.
163
00:06:35,529 --> 00:06:38,231
This is nice.
Like old times.
164
00:06:38,298 --> 00:06:39,533
How so?
165
00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:41,535
You and me, sitting
here, watching TV
166
00:06:41,602 --> 00:06:43,370
while the good-looking
owner of the house is
167
00:06:43,437 --> 00:06:46,173
out on the deck swapping
spit with a hot chick.
168
00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:49,877
Yeah, there is
a bit of deja vu.
169
00:06:49,943 --> 00:06:51,044
Not only that.
170
00:06:51,111 --> 00:06:53,113
It feels like it's
happened before.
171
00:06:56,316 --> 00:06:58,085
Yes, it does.
172
00:07:00,087 --> 00:07:02,590
Man, I've seen so much
crazy stuff in this house,
173
00:07:02,656 --> 00:07:03,991
I could write a book.
174
00:07:04,057 --> 00:07:05,993
That's a good idea.
Got a title?
175
00:07:06,059 --> 00:07:07,595
Hmm...
176
00:07:07,661 --> 00:07:09,096
Maybe I can't
write a book.
177
00:07:09,162 --> 00:07:11,565
WALDEN:
All right then, cheerio!
178
00:07:11,632 --> 00:07:12,566
(door closes)
179
00:07:12,633 --> 00:07:14,034
Cheerio?
180
00:07:14,101 --> 00:07:15,469
Means "good-bye"
in England.
181
00:07:15,536 --> 00:07:17,070
Oh.
182
00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:18,205
What do they have for
breakfast over there,
183
00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:19,973
a bowl of good-byes?
184
00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:23,043
'Ello, lads.
Well, hey.
185
00:07:23,110 --> 00:07:25,546
So, Zoey seems very nice.
186
00:07:25,613 --> 00:07:28,982
Yeah, the bird really tickles
my fancy.
187
00:07:29,049 --> 00:07:30,383
Help me out here.
188
00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:32,553
Is "fancy" the English
word for "nutsack"?
189
00:07:36,156 --> 00:07:38,191
No, it means that I like her.
190
00:07:38,258 --> 00:07:40,060
I think this could get serious.
191
00:07:40,127 --> 00:07:42,062
Wow, you're moving pretty quick,
aren't you?
192
00:07:42,129 --> 00:07:43,931
That's what she said.
193
00:07:43,997 --> 00:07:45,032
(chuckles)
194
00:07:45,098 --> 00:07:46,900
What are you laughing at?
195
00:07:46,967 --> 00:07:48,869
He did a "That's what
she said" joke.
196
00:07:48,936 --> 00:07:50,037
Because that's what she said.
197
00:07:50,103 --> 00:07:54,241
Oh. That's not funny.
198
00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:56,510
She thinks I'm on the rebound.
199
00:07:56,577 --> 00:07:58,045
Well, aren't you?
200
00:07:58,111 --> 00:07:59,647
You were with Bridget
for 15 years.
201
00:07:59,713 --> 00:08:02,115
That's over.
I signed the divorce papers.
202
00:08:02,182 --> 00:08:05,218
(sighs)
I'm ready to fall in love again.
203
00:08:05,285 --> 00:08:08,088
Please tell me you didn't
actually say that to her.
204
00:08:08,155 --> 00:08:09,156
Why?
205
00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:12,292
Dude, even I know that's wrong.
206
00:08:14,562 --> 00:08:16,897
Walden, you're young,
you're rich, you're handsome.
207
00:08:16,964 --> 00:08:18,566
If I was even one
of those things
208
00:08:18,632 --> 00:08:21,301
I would have screwed myself
to death years ago.
209
00:08:21,368 --> 00:08:23,336
Well, I want to be in
a relationship...
210
00:08:23,403 --> 00:08:27,240
with romance and intimacy
and commitment.
211
00:08:27,307 --> 00:08:29,610
Oh, I get it. You're a chick.
212
00:08:32,079 --> 00:08:34,314
Jake, we're living in
his house.
213
00:08:34,381 --> 00:08:37,250
A very nice chick.
214
00:08:45,292 --> 00:08:48,562
This is absolutely
ridiculous.
215
00:08:48,629 --> 00:08:50,998
You don't have to wear the hat
if you don't want to.
216
00:08:51,064 --> 00:08:54,234
It's not the hat.
Well, it's not totally the hat.
217
00:08:54,301 --> 00:08:58,105
It's the incredible
extravagance.
218
00:08:58,171 --> 00:09:01,074
You do realize I'm still not
ready to sleep with you, yes?
219
00:09:01,141 --> 00:09:02,509
Oh, I'm not trying
to have sex with you.
220
00:09:02,576 --> 00:09:05,012
Why not?
What's wrong with me?
221
00:09:05,078 --> 00:09:07,514
Nothing. Why? Do you want
to have sex with me?
222
00:09:07,581 --> 00:09:10,951
Yeah! No! No, it's too soon.
It's too soon.
223
00:09:11,018 --> 00:09:14,054
Well, is it too soon...
224
00:09:14,121 --> 00:09:15,689
for this?
225
00:09:15,756 --> 00:09:18,626
Oh, God, Walden,
what have you done?
226
00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:23,396
(gasps)
227
00:09:25,065 --> 00:09:26,299
What do you think?
228
00:09:26,366 --> 00:09:28,535
I think you're out
of your bloody mind.
229
00:09:28,602 --> 00:09:29,970
I can't accept this.
230
00:09:30,037 --> 00:09:30,971
Why not?
231
00:09:31,038 --> 00:09:33,140
Because it's too much.
232
00:09:33,206 --> 00:09:34,708
It's crazy!
233
00:09:34,775 --> 00:09:37,044
What about getting a diamond
necklace for a girl
234
00:09:37,110 --> 00:09:38,211
you've haven't slept with yet
235
00:09:38,278 --> 00:09:39,546
while flying to Mexico
for dinner
236
00:09:39,613 --> 00:09:41,348
on your private jet is crazy?
237
00:09:42,549 --> 00:09:44,217
Okay, when I say it out loud
238
00:09:44,284 --> 00:09:45,686
it does sound a little crazy.
239
00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:48,188
Good thing I didn't get you
the matching tiara.
240
00:09:49,456 --> 00:09:52,259
Okay, uh, there might be
one other thing.
241
00:09:52,325 --> 00:09:54,594
Oh, God, you didn't buy me
a pony, did you?
242
00:09:54,662 --> 00:09:56,129
No. Why, do you want one?
243
00:09:56,196 --> 00:09:57,130
No, I don't.
244
00:09:57,197 --> 00:10:00,033
The thing is, I know some people
245
00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,635
on the board
of the private school
246
00:10:01,702 --> 00:10:04,004
you're trying to get
your daughter in,
247
00:10:04,071 --> 00:10:05,572
so I pulled some strings
and got her enrolled.
248
00:10:05,639 --> 00:10:09,276
Wait-- you got Ava
into Bellwood?
249
00:10:09,342 --> 00:10:12,245
But don't worry, one phone call
and she's out on her ass.
250
00:10:12,312 --> 00:10:14,114
No, don't do that!
251
00:10:14,181 --> 00:10:15,415
Walden, this is wonderful!
252
00:10:15,482 --> 00:10:17,384
You're not upset?
253
00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:20,087
No! No, no, no.
254
00:10:20,153 --> 00:10:22,155
What you did is brilliant.
255
00:10:22,222 --> 00:10:24,557
Mm!
Utterly brilliant.
256
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:27,427
PILOT (over P.A.):
Mr. Schmidt, we'll be descending
257
00:10:27,494 --> 00:10:30,731
into Guadalajara in
a few minutes.
258
00:10:30,798 --> 00:10:33,266
Circle, circle!
259
00:10:33,333 --> 00:10:35,468
Excuse me?
260
00:10:35,535 --> 00:10:39,472
He's about to descend
into London.
261
00:10:42,609 --> 00:10:45,278
WALDEN (British accent):
Hello, Heathrow!
262
00:10:45,345 --> 00:10:47,214
Oh, God, that is
not funny.
263
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:53,721
What a lovely
landing strip.
264
00:10:53,787 --> 00:10:57,124
* Men. *
265
00:10:57,190 --> 00:10:57,958
Morning.
Morning.
266
00:10:58,025 --> 00:11:00,694
Want to explain
the hat?
267
00:11:00,761 --> 00:11:02,429
It's not a hat, it's a sombrero.
268
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:05,098
"Sombrero" is Spanish for "hat."
269
00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:06,934
Really?
Seems awfully complicated.
270
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,702
Why don't they
just call it a hat?
271
00:11:11,739 --> 00:11:13,673
No, not worth it.
272
00:11:13,741 --> 00:11:15,408
Morning.
Morning.
273
00:11:15,475 --> 00:11:16,844
Cameron Diaz, señor.
274
00:11:19,346 --> 00:11:21,114
WALDEN:
Cameron Diaz?
Choose your battles.
275
00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:23,050
Right.
276
00:11:23,116 --> 00:11:24,885
So, how'd it go last night?
277
00:11:24,952 --> 00:11:26,253
It was great.
278
00:11:26,319 --> 00:11:27,755
I think I'm falling in love.
279
00:11:27,821 --> 00:11:30,858
Oh, Walden, that's
muy grande chiquita.
280
00:11:32,092 --> 00:11:34,394
Hey, man...
281
00:11:34,461 --> 00:11:36,363
I really don't appreciate
you making fun of me.
282
00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:37,831
Sorry.
283
00:11:37,898 --> 00:11:40,033
(doorbell rings)
284
00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:43,036
I'll get it.
285
00:11:45,105 --> 00:11:46,907
Who knew he spoke Spanish?
286
00:11:49,076 --> 00:11:53,713
* Zoey, Zoey,
Zoey, Zoe, Zoey... *
287
00:11:53,781 --> 00:11:55,182
Bridget.
288
00:11:55,248 --> 00:11:57,150
I can't sign the divorce papers.
289
00:11:57,217 --> 00:11:59,219
I love you and I want you back.
290
00:12:01,288 --> 00:12:03,356
Oh, bollocks.
291
00:12:03,423 --> 00:12:04,892
* Men. *
292
00:12:10,163 --> 00:12:12,565
Wait... whoa, whoa,
wait, I...
293
00:12:12,632 --> 00:12:13,867
I don't understand.
294
00:12:13,934 --> 00:12:15,402
You're the one who
wanted the divorce.
295
00:12:15,468 --> 00:12:16,703
I know-- I thought
it's what I wanted,
296
00:12:16,770 --> 00:12:18,005
but when I saw your name
on the papers,
297
00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:20,107
I just, I couldn't sign.
298
00:12:20,173 --> 00:12:21,674
Ay, Chihuahua.
299
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,010
Stop it.
300
00:12:23,076 --> 00:12:25,879
Sorry, it's the hat.
301
00:12:25,946 --> 00:12:28,648
Is everything okay?
You don't look happy.
302
00:12:28,715 --> 00:12:29,817
Yeah, no, yeah,
it's great.
303
00:12:29,883 --> 00:12:31,418
(stammering):
I just...
304
00:12:31,484 --> 00:12:33,520
What about that doctor
you were dating?
Alex?
305
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,889
I saw him.
He's a dreamboat.
306
00:12:35,956 --> 00:12:38,425
The truth is, he was
just a rebound thing.
307
00:12:38,491 --> 00:12:40,627
Yeah, but rebounds
work out sometimes.
308
00:12:40,693 --> 00:12:41,761
I mean, take Abe Lincoln.
309
00:12:41,829 --> 00:12:43,363
He met his wife on a rebound,
310
00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:45,632
and, and they had a
long-term relationship.
311
00:12:45,698 --> 00:12:47,434
Until, you know...
312
00:12:49,669 --> 00:12:52,672
Hm... I didn't know
Abe Lincoln killed himself.
313
00:12:54,707 --> 00:12:57,644
How many rebounds have you
had since we broke up?
314
00:12:57,710 --> 00:12:58,912
Well...
315
00:12:58,979 --> 00:13:00,147
(whispering):
It's a trap, don't answer.
316
00:13:00,213 --> 00:13:02,449
None that meant anything.
317
00:13:02,515 --> 00:13:03,783
Yes!
318
00:13:03,851 --> 00:13:05,685
I mean, I haven't
exactly been celibate.
319
00:13:05,752 --> 00:13:06,820
Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
But I haven't
been a slut, either.
320
00:13:06,887 --> 00:13:08,121
Attaboy.
321
00:13:08,188 --> 00:13:11,524
Come on, let's go upstairs.
322
00:13:11,591 --> 00:13:13,693
Really?
Don't you want to?
323
00:13:13,760 --> 00:13:15,863
Well, yeah, I want to.
324
00:13:15,929 --> 00:13:18,866
I just, I-I...shouldn't
we be taking it slow?
325
00:13:18,932 --> 00:13:21,034
We've been married
for 15 years, Walden.
326
00:13:21,101 --> 00:13:22,402
Come on.
327
00:13:22,469 --> 00:13:24,537
Okay.
328
00:13:24,604 --> 00:13:26,706
Hello.
Hey.
329
00:13:26,773 --> 00:13:28,942
Hi.
330
00:13:29,009 --> 00:13:32,579
It's very weird that you
live with these people.
331
00:13:34,614 --> 00:13:36,884
So what's he gonna
do about Zoey?
332
00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:39,752
Well, unless I miss my guess,
333
00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:43,490
he's gonna lie to both of them
until it blows up in his face,
334
00:13:43,556 --> 00:13:45,492
and everyone gets
their feelings hurt,
335
00:13:45,558 --> 00:13:47,494
and he's left alone
and miserable.
336
00:13:47,560 --> 00:13:49,462
Wow. That sucks.
Isn't there a better way to
337
00:13:49,529 --> 00:13:52,032
date two women
at the same time?
338
00:13:52,099 --> 00:13:54,034
Aw, Jake...
339
00:13:54,101 --> 00:13:56,970
No.
340
00:13:57,037 --> 00:14:00,473
I want you so badly.
341
00:14:00,540 --> 00:14:02,842
Yeah, yep, I, uh...
342
00:14:02,910 --> 00:14:05,712
...want you too.
I was such a fool.
343
00:14:05,778 --> 00:14:07,580
I can't believe I let someone
as great as you get away.
344
00:14:07,647 --> 00:14:09,516
Wait, you said I was immature.
345
00:14:09,582 --> 00:14:11,885
You are, but that's
part of your charm.
346
00:14:11,952 --> 00:14:14,021
I love you, Walden.
347
00:14:14,087 --> 00:14:18,158
I love you, I love you,
I love you.
348
00:14:18,225 --> 00:14:20,193
That is awesome.
349
00:14:20,260 --> 00:14:21,528
Uh...
350
00:14:21,594 --> 00:14:24,197
Just... okay,
okay, well...
351
00:14:24,264 --> 00:14:26,599
Can we just hold on
for one second?
352
00:14:26,666 --> 00:14:29,169
Where are you going?
Uh, the bathroom.
353
00:14:29,236 --> 00:14:30,904
Why don't you just use that one?
354
00:14:30,971 --> 00:14:33,040
I'm a little pee shy.
355
00:14:33,106 --> 00:14:34,774
I don't want you to hear me.
356
00:14:34,841 --> 00:14:35,976
Since when?
357
00:14:36,043 --> 00:14:37,544
It's a new thing.
358
00:14:37,610 --> 00:14:40,213
People change, Bridget,
people grow.
359
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:44,051
Do you think you and Mom
would ever get back together?
360
00:14:44,117 --> 00:14:47,187
Well, you know I will always
care for your mother.
361
00:14:47,254 --> 00:14:50,590
She's a terrific lady,
and a great mom,
362
00:14:50,657 --> 00:14:53,793
and no one can predict
the future...
363
00:14:53,860 --> 00:14:55,795
but no freakin' way.
364
00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:57,998
She said the same thing.
365
00:14:58,065 --> 00:15:01,568
But used a different word
than "freakin'."
366
00:15:01,634 --> 00:15:02,569
Hey.
Hey.
367
00:15:02,635 --> 00:15:04,137
Hey.
368
00:15:04,204 --> 00:15:05,638
Everything all right?
369
00:15:05,705 --> 00:15:07,274
Uh, no. As Zoey would say,
370
00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:09,609
I'm in a bit of a sticky wicket.
371
00:15:09,676 --> 00:15:11,578
You mean you were
in a sticky wicket,
372
00:15:11,644 --> 00:15:13,947
then you finished up and
came down here for a snack.
373
00:15:14,014 --> 00:15:18,251
No, no, I-I have a conundrum.
374
00:15:18,318 --> 00:15:19,953
Then you should've worn it.
375
00:15:20,020 --> 00:15:22,889
Might've avoided the stickiness,
you know, wicket-wise.
376
00:15:24,691 --> 00:15:27,294
Okay, I'm just going
to talk to you.
Please.
377
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,629
I've been dreaming about getting
back together with Bridget
378
00:15:29,696 --> 00:15:33,967
for months now, but since
I met Zoey, I'm not so sure.
379
00:15:34,034 --> 00:15:35,802
It is a pickle.
What's a pickle?
380
00:15:35,868 --> 00:15:38,171
Shh.
381
00:15:38,238 --> 00:15:39,706
What does your heart tell you?
382
00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:42,642
My heart tells me that
383
00:15:42,709 --> 00:15:45,178
Bridget is the past,
and Zoey is the future.
384
00:15:45,245 --> 00:15:47,047
Oh, I get it.
You're trying to figure out
385
00:15:47,114 --> 00:15:48,181
which one gets your pickle.
386
00:15:49,382 --> 00:15:51,051
Essentially, yes.
387
00:15:51,118 --> 00:15:54,054
Well, then, I say
follow your heart.
388
00:15:54,121 --> 00:15:55,222
I say follow your pickle.
389
00:15:57,257 --> 00:15:58,992
Try to ignore him.
390
00:15:59,059 --> 00:16:01,828
I've been with Bridget
for 15 years.
391
00:16:01,894 --> 00:16:03,263
That's tough to
just walk away from.
392
00:16:03,330 --> 00:16:05,032
But as you said yourself,
Bridget's the past.
393
00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:06,899
Yeah, but if I get
back together with her,
394
00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:08,635
I don't have to
give up $600 million
395
00:16:08,701 --> 00:16:09,902
in a divorce settlement.
396
00:16:09,969 --> 00:16:11,671
The future's overrated.
Go with Bridget.
397
00:16:11,738 --> 00:16:13,840
I mean, it does make sense,
right? All I'd have to do
398
00:16:13,906 --> 00:16:15,275
is sell this place
and move back in with her.
399
00:16:15,342 --> 00:16:16,943
You can't live your
life in the past.
400
00:16:17,010 --> 00:16:18,945
Go with Zoey.
You think?
401
00:16:19,012 --> 00:16:20,913
I do. And I don't have
a horse in this race.
402
00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,615
No, you're right.
403
00:16:22,682 --> 00:16:23,883
Zoey it is.
404
00:16:23,950 --> 00:16:25,285
Thank you, Alan.
405
00:16:25,352 --> 00:16:26,686
Cheerios!
406
00:16:29,289 --> 00:16:31,858
You have no shame, do you?
407
00:16:31,924 --> 00:16:33,326
Shame, no.
408
00:16:33,393 --> 00:16:35,362
Malibu beach house, yes.
409
00:16:39,099 --> 00:16:41,801
Welcome back.
410
00:16:41,868 --> 00:16:44,171
Oh, boy.
411
00:16:46,439 --> 00:16:48,341
Bridget, I can't remember--
412
00:16:48,408 --> 00:16:51,111
do you like your Band-Aids
taken off quick or slow?
413
00:16:51,178 --> 00:16:52,845
I don't understand.
414
00:16:52,912 --> 00:16:55,215
Let's just go with quick.
415
00:16:55,282 --> 00:16:57,817
I don't think it's a good
idea to sleep with you,
416
00:16:57,884 --> 00:16:59,152
since I started
seeing someone new
417
00:16:59,219 --> 00:17:00,920
and I think she might
be the real deal.
418
00:17:00,987 --> 00:17:03,290
Not that you weren't
the real deal,
419
00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:04,791
you're just the ex-real deal,
420
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:08,728
and she's the next real deal.
421
00:17:08,795 --> 00:17:11,198
Anyway, I'd like for you you to
sign the divorce papers,
422
00:17:11,264 --> 00:17:13,733
so we can both go meet
people we like better.
423
00:17:15,135 --> 00:17:17,404
What?
Friends?
424
00:17:18,938 --> 00:17:21,040
I am so humiliated!
I'm sorry!
425
00:17:21,108 --> 00:17:23,776
I can't believe you waited till
I was half naked in your bed
426
00:17:23,843 --> 00:17:25,345
to tell me you were
seeing someone else!
427
00:17:25,412 --> 00:17:28,047
Kind of hard to bring up while
you're taking off my pants.
428
00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:31,017
And by the way,
you look sensational.
429
00:17:31,084 --> 00:17:32,352
The Pilates is
really paying off.
430
00:17:32,419 --> 00:17:35,021
Go to hell,
you son of a bitch!
431
00:17:35,088 --> 00:17:36,789
How about an "attaboy" for not
432
00:17:36,856 --> 00:17:38,725
having sex with you out of
respect for the other woman
433
00:17:38,791 --> 00:17:39,792
I'm falling in love with?
434
00:17:39,859 --> 00:17:40,893
BRIDGET:
Drop dead!
435
00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:48,201
How many times have
we seen this movie?
436
00:17:48,268 --> 00:17:49,702
Too many to count.
437
00:17:49,769 --> 00:17:51,938
Maybe it's the house.
438
00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:53,806
What do you mean?
I think it's haunted.
439
00:17:53,873 --> 00:17:57,277
Like, built on an angry
woman burial ground.
440
00:17:57,344 --> 00:17:59,879
Certainly can't be the fault
of the men who live in it.
441
00:17:59,946 --> 00:18:01,714
Sometimes at night,
if I'm really quiet,
442
00:18:01,781 --> 00:18:03,783
I think I can hear
them bitching.
443
00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:11,124
That didn't go as well
as I'd hoped.
444
00:18:11,191 --> 00:18:12,692
I wouldn't worry about it.
445
00:18:12,759 --> 00:18:14,461
She doesn't look like
the type to carry a grudge.
446
00:18:14,527 --> 00:18:15,695
(tires squealing)
447
00:18:23,903 --> 00:18:27,307
But I don't know her
like you do.
448
00:18:27,374 --> 00:18:29,376
Haunted...
449
00:18:30,510 --> 00:18:33,112
* Men. *
450
00:18:35,482 --> 00:18:37,284
* Men. *
451
00:18:37,350 --> 00:18:40,820
(British accent): So the madam
of the brothel opens the door
452
00:18:40,887 --> 00:18:45,158
and there's a man on the stoop
with no arms and no legs.
453
00:18:45,225 --> 00:18:48,495
And she says, "What do you think
you're going to do here?"
454
00:18:48,561 --> 00:18:51,998
And he says,
"I rang the bell, didn't I?"
455
00:18:52,064 --> 00:18:53,800
(laughs)
456
00:18:53,866 --> 00:18:55,868
You're terrible.
457
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:04,177
ROSE:
Did he break your heart?
458
00:19:06,913 --> 00:19:07,847
Who are you?
459
00:19:07,914 --> 00:19:09,516
That doesn't matter.
460
00:19:09,582 --> 00:19:12,685
Do you want him back, or
do you want him to suffer?
461
00:19:14,787 --> 00:19:16,289
I don't know.
462
00:19:16,356 --> 00:19:17,857
That's all right.
463
00:19:17,924 --> 00:19:19,859
Oftentimes,
they're the same thing.
464
00:19:21,794 --> 00:19:23,863
Come with me,
and I'll teach you.
465
00:19:30,837 --> 00:19:34,774
Captioning sponsored by
CBS and WARNER BROS. TELEVISION
466
00:19:34,841 --> 00:19:37,777
and TOYOTA.
467
00:19:37,844 --> 00:20:06,506
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
32476
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