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So, Mr. Heller, I think it's fair to say that

it's time to get your affairs in order.

I see.

I didn't...

I see. Well...

All right then.

-Thank you. You'll let me know? -Absolutely.

-Talk to me. Just me, not my wife. -Of course.

All right.

Thank you.

Yeah. Yeah.

Work will set you free.

Right.

Here for you, and I got one for you too.

-And don't forget to brush your teeth. -Thank you. Thank you.

-I will. -That's Egyptian cotton.

-Really? -It's beautiful, isn't it?

-It is. -Yes. Fifty percent off everything.

You're not gonna get a deal like that anywhere.

-I need to steal him for a moment. -You do?

-Don't forget to bring him back. -All right.

Well, you make a decision. I can get either one.

-Would you just stop for a sec? -I'm fine, fine, fine.

Okay.

-Dad, what did the doctor say? -Nothing. Just what I thought.

-What about the stomach pains? -Pulled muscle. It's okay.

It's going to be okay.

Who wants a chocolate? Who's ready?

All right, here you go. There's one for you.

And there's one for you. And there's one for you as well.

Hi-ho. Get your chocolate. Get it. Get it. Get it.

Hey, Herbert.

-Hello. How are you? -Looks like your sale's going great.

Remember, city council said merchants had to provide extra parking?

Anyway, it would be great if you could set up some parking around the corner.

I'm sorry.

You have to excuse me. I'm sorry.

So far, your record for surviving the worst day of your life is 100 percent.

Just in case you needed it.

You need it too?

Here. Let me give you another one. Here you go.

So a little bird told me it was somebody's birthday today.

It's a serious, serious surgery.

You survived.

Abbey...

You're gonna be here for a while, you know?

Hey, Ruth. This is David, Holocaust Foundation.

David.

Listen, there's this gentleman, Herbert Heller.

He was at Auschwitz-Birkenau.

Sorry, I don't do that anymore.

Come on, Ruth.

You know how to do this. Just follow the protocol.

I was never very big on protocols.

The thing is, Ruth, I don't know where else to turn.

You know what?

I have an idea.

Do you have another shirt?

Put it on.

Wear a different color next time.

Hi. Hello, Mr. Heller.

-Hello. -Hello.

-I'm Ruth. -Hello, Ruth.

Yes.

Come in.

-This is Luke, our cameraman. -Hello.

-And this is Abbey, our intern. -Hello.

So, Mr. Heller, would you like to have your...

Please. Herbert. All right?

Okay. Herbert. Would you like your family here for any of this?

No, no.

They don't know anything about any of this business, so no.

They're not aware that you were at Auschwitz?

Never any desire to tell them?

Okay, so how this works is we meet here each day.

You'll ask questions?

What sort of questions?

I might start by saying...

tell me about your father.

Which maybe you can tell me about your father.

What a beautiful dogwood tree.

Your dogwood tree, it's in bloom. It's beautiful.

Oh, look at that.

-So, Herbert? -Yes.

-Your father was an engineer? -He was.

-And you have photos? -You asked me to bring some photographs.

-I did. -Thank you.

These are, well, they're family photographs.

And I'd like to... have them back.

Of course.

-This is where I'll sit? -That's where you will sit.

-You see this, it's nicely set up here. -All right. Oh, my.

-This is the interview? -This is the interview.

Are you the Heller from... from Heller's?

-I am. -Like the store?

That's right. You, you know the store?

Yeah.

-I've got a photo. -She's a Heller's kid.

Yes.

One of our best-selling models, that one.

Yes.

A good stroller.

You know, we don't have to just jump into this right away.

Why don't we have a little bite to eat first?

-What can I get you? -No! I'm not hungry. Thank you.

No? I'll get you something, just in case.

And you too?

Come.

Abbey, keep an eye on the equipment.

Sorry. I'm just getting the camera.

I feel like I know your face.

Maybe from the store, from Heller's?

Might have been a while ago.

What happened there?

I don't know.

it was just like a medical...

02 sat. 02 sat's a hundred percent.

You're okay, Abbey. Abbey, you're okay.

Too nosy.

-Whatever. -I'm sorry.

Sorry.

I've got one myself.

I tell my daughters

I got burned on the water heater.

But you didn't.

No.

So, how did it happen then?

Long story.

We got time.

Yeah, time... That's why I'm doing this.

What?

Don't know that I do have time.

Anyway...

Not so sure.

Oh, go ahead. I want to see what happens.

Maybe if you tell me about your scar, I could tell you about mine.

We make a deal?

Do you know the name Heydrich?

No.

But you've heard of Hitler, I think, yes?

-Yeah. Yeah, yes. -So...

Heydrich.

Reinhard Heydrich.

He was Hitler's third in command.

It was Heydrich who came up with the plan.

What plan?

The plan to kill all the Jews.

Heydrich came to my hometown.

To Prague.

Before Heydrich,

my father gave us a magical childhood.

He was a respected engineer.

-What a beautiful dress. -Thank you.

This is why they act as if the world outside doesn't exist,

as though nothing bad can happen.

They just drink more champagne and keep listening to Mahler.

You don't like Mahler?

That's not the point.

The point is they're just pretending things are safe.

Already the newspapers are publishing in German instead of Czech.

My brother's family left for Canada last month.

So what are you suggesting, my friend?

What I'm saying, Karel, is it might be time for us to leave too.

And what about Papa?

Papa actually believes it.

Right now, he's saying it's okay, and it will be okay.

Even Schoenberg left.

So you actually believe they would have all the 60,000 Jews leave Prague?

I mean, don't be ridiculous.

They can't afford to lose their biggest businessmen

or their top engineers.

Everything will return to normal soon.

But it's not true.

Karel, they've already taken the Sudetenland.

They will take whatever they want.

They will do whatever they want.

Well, if they do want all the Jews to leave the country,

they will have to do it without my cooperation.

-Thank you for inviting us. -Of course.

My stepbrother is so serious.

It's a party.

Is that yours, Papa?

I helped design the entrance and the waterworks below.

Keep your eyes down, boys.

Karel, you shouldn't take such risks.

This machine uses X-rays to see through your skin

all the way to your foot's bones.

All 26 of them. It shows how big they'll grow.

Sir, I suggest getting a size larger.

Give the boy room to grow.

Please don't touch the dials.

He doesn't know I'm an engineer.

It's like magic.

That's right. Oh, do you...

Do you think the shoes will be magic too?

Maybe they'll even score some goals for you.

Of course, I wanted to believe him.

I wanted to make those magic shoes work at any cost.

Come on, Johnny. Come on.

Go, go! Come on! Go! You got this.

Another one, Herbert.

What are you doing?

You'll see.

That must hurt.

It does.

Rudy, did you see it?

-Yes! -Yeah!

Chocolate?

-I'm okay. -That's a shame.

This is 80 percent Belgian dark.

Okay. Thanks.

My weakness.

It feels strange.

-Why? -I'm the only one who talks.

Tell me about your school.

It's normal, I guess.

Nicer than normal.

But I'm kind of lonely.

So I take photographs.

Photographs? Why?

People don't show their real selves.

They put on like fake smiles, poses.

Who they really are, they keep hidden in their purse

or their pocket or some secret drawer.

-My gosh. -Right, dude. What's her deal?

What a freak.

And your family?

You're not gonna get into Juilliard if you keep dragging the tempo.

Watch your rhythm.

Clean it up.

Loose wrists, Abbey.

I gotta go. I'm late.

I wish you'd let me do something with your hair.

Don't forget you're with your dad this weekend.

For Christ's sake! What's wrong with you?

Typical, disconnected, broken, suburban-type shit.

Stuff. Sorry.

You know, really supposed to be hearing about your story.

You're sure? I would... much rather hear about yours.

I'm sure.

Well, times got worse.

The worse they got,

the harder my father tried to make every day brighter for us.

Even Heinz smiled once.

Yeah, when the acrobat fell down, it was kind of funny.

Herbert, catch.

Papa, can we come next weekend?

-Jesus. -I'm sorry, boys.

The circus will be in Vienna by then.

They travel the world in these little wagons.

I don't want it to end.

Just because the circus is over doesn't mean the fun must end.

Do you want to see a trick?

Yes.

Give me your ticket.

Heinz, your seltzer, please.

-It's flat. -Oh, flat is good.

I am going to take this needle

and make it point directly at the Chateau across the park.

Ready?

-How did you do it? -It's magic.

-It's not magic. It's... -Heinz, it's magic.

Even your beloved Einstein said the path to intelligence,

it's not knowledge, it's imagination.

-Yes, Papa. -Race me for ice cream.

I give up.

Would you?

Okay.

Heinz, do you want to practice penalty kicks?

No. I'm studying.

And you should be as well.

Boys, come down. It's too beautiful to stay inside.

Let's go for a ride.

Some of us have studying to do.

I have an answer for that.

Let's go.

What is the square root of 529?

-This... this is my magic wand. -Who are you? Houdini?

It's a slide rule.

The square root of 529 is 23.

-Papa, why are they here? -Remember Aunt Edna?

How she came to our house last summer for a week and then stayed a month?

Yes. She smelled of onions.

And a bad perfume.

Well, they are just like her.

They are visitors overstaying their welcome.

And just like Aunt Edna, they will be gone soon.

They don't smell so good either.

-What is the square root of... -Oh, Herbert, come on.

You're missing the view. Give me that. Take the wheel.

-But Papa, I... -Take the wheel. Just...

-Great, now we can all die together. -No, we're not gonna die.

If the road goes right, you go right. If it goes left, you go left.

And I will work the brakes. And Old Johann...

is getting a little boring.

-That's so much better. -Herbert, hold it still.

I'm trying. -So what is the square root of...

Isn't this a much better way to do homework, huh?

Yes, Papa.

-Jesus, stop! -Oh, live a little.

-Hold it still, Herbert. -I'm trying.

Let him drive.

So, the square root of...

-Papa, drive. Don't let him drive. -He's okay. He's doing his best.

I predict an A-plus on this test.

I know that one.

-Bad grades?

More like, you know, gotta get the right grades,

get into the right college to justify your existence.

Like, can never do enough right to cancel out all the wrong.

What wrong did you do?

I wouldn't even know where to start.

Why not start at the beginning?

It got very quiet in here.

My father tried to make every day brighter for us.

-He's opening up to you. -He would take us to the circus.

I'm gonna find more excuses to step outside of the room.

-Just keep recording. -Capture our imagination.

Why?

I'm not, like, qualified or anything.

What if I say something and freak him out?

Abbey, this man has faced more frightening challenges

than an angry teenage girl. Trust me.

What do you know?

Well, my parents were there too in the camps.

I was an angry teenage girl and they were pretty unfazed by me.

But... if it's too much,

tell me. I would understand.

No, it was fine.

It's just like...

I don't know. I mean, he's some old European guy.

Like what do I have in common with him?

Well, something, apparently.

Just don't stop recording.

House of Representatives.

Yesterday,

December 7, 1941...

Heinz, change the station.

...a date which will live in infamy...

Mama, why I must I wear it? I look stupid.

Don't worry, Herbert.

All our friends will soon wear it too.

We all get to look stupid together.

Herbert, don't complain.

I must sew one on every piece of our clothing.

Still, I stitch it with care,

using silk thread and a triple stitch at the top of the star.

Why?

Because if we must wear them, ours will be made with pride.

And when you look at that stitch,

you'll know it's from your mother. Who loves you.

Boys... it's just for now.

Eventually, we were prevented even from going to school.

What are you doing here?

-I'm here to play. -We don't want to play with you.

-Why? -We don't play with Jews.

That's right.

Come on, you little kike, aren't you even gonna fight back?

Get him! Don't let him get away.

-You can't run forever. -We know where you live, Herbert.

-Catch him! -Get him!

You can't run forever!

Get out of here.

Or I am going to claw the tiny little thing between your legs.

The whole world is losing its mind.

Listen, Herbert.

If you are ever in trouble,

you can always come here.

Do you understand me?

Yes, Mrs. Krall.

I wish I had someone like that.

-What? -A Mrs. Krall.

-A protector? -Yeah, I don't know. Something like that.

Do you get bullied?

Not like...

Wait, Abbey?

Oh, man. I'm worried about her.

It's more than just Jane's bullshit.

It's... I feel like Abbey's just an expression of all of my worst traits.

Just like the normal amount, I guess.

But you would like a protector.

Who doesn't, right?

But I don't know.

Maybe, maybe more like a friend who's stronger than you.

You know? I thought I had that once.

Where is your friend now?

Nowhere.

Nothing. I--

We're really supposed to be hearing your story. You wanna just...

My story, so.

After that, it became too dangerous to even go outside.

Look what I found. It's your favorite kind and there's almost half the bar left.

-Thank you, Papa. -Yeah? Let's go home now.

It's one hour to curfew.

Papa, look.

-Come, boys. We need to go home. -But, Papa, he's our friend.

No, let's go.

Come.

Mayer predicted it.

More arrests every day. And now it's too late.

Stop it, Heinz.

Is it true? Is it too late?

By the time I could get counterfeit papers, this war would be long over.

We should have left when Uncle David went to England.

You know what happened in Poland?

Stop it, Heinz.

-They're already digging our graves! -That's enough!

Please.

That was the last time anyone dared to raise their voice.

Next morning, everything changed.

How?

It was a day just like today.

Clear blue sky.

The Gestapo are downstairs collecting the families.

-In our building? -Yes.

You need to take the boys, go out the back,

and head straight for your sister's.

I will stay here and I will distract them.

-Herbert, go get dressed. Now! -What is wrong?

No, no. Everything is okay. Just listen to your mother, okay?

What is going on?

Heinz, you too.

Heller family open the door. Immediately!

Refusing a command from the Gestapo is a crime against the state.

Heller family, Karel, Melanie, Heinz and Herbert.

You have exactly five minutes to pack one suitcase each.

Sir, we have all our papers in order. May I ask...

No, no. No, no, no.

No!

Five minutes!

Herbert, no.

Bring only what you need. Warm clothes.

You can come get them later.

-Herbert.

-Herbert? -Yes. Excuse me.

You were saying?

Rather than be taken by the Gestapo,

some families made another choice.

Look out.

Heinz, Heinz, take this.

Hold tight.

-Sorry. -I'm sorry. Are you all right?

You're the first person I've ever told that to.

It's too much, huh?

I'm fine. I'm fine. It's just...

It's too much.

Brought you the things you asked for.

Your dad wanted to say hi.

You know, you guys are divorced.

You don't have to keep...

I can't handle any more of these bullshit rehab meetings.

It's not optional.

They did say they'd give you a pass for Sabrina's memorial.

May this water recall to mind Sabrina's baptism

as Christ went through the deep waters of death...

Abbey.

...to the promise of resurrection. Amen.

Amen.

Like as a father has been for his own children...

I get it. One photo to sum up a whole person.

Not a whole.

Wait. Stop there.

If you think about it, it's a gift.

How so?

Like, we can see what the whole world is

too scared to recognize.

What are you talking about?

The amount of pointless suffering

that goes on in this world each day.

Be more honest to make a real statement.

What kind of statement do you mean?

He remembered that we are but dust.

The days of man are but as grass for the flourish

as a flower of the field.

For as soon as the wind goes over, it is gone.

Okay, look forward to meeting you in person.

Thank you so much. Okay, bye.

That was good news.

I got offered a three-month consulting gig in London.

You know, I always wanted to go to London.

I won't have a lot of time while I'm there,

and you need full-time parental supervision,

so you'll stay with your dad.

Where did Dad go?

I don't know.

Hurry!

Faster!

Down the hallway.

It's all right.

Would you like some, Sir?

No, Heller. I prefer cabbage.

I love cabbage too. Especially the red served sweet.

Sometimes we got to have it on holidays.

Heller, for a Jewish boy, you work very hard, don't you?

Yes, Sir, for a Jewish boy.

If I was very careful,

I could even steal some vegetables from the garden.

Potatoes. Turnips.

Hi, Mom.

I think everybody just worries too much, you know.

It's impossible.

And you know now U.S. is involved, Russia is involved,

the whole world is watching us.

I mean, we had Red Cross the other day here

so we must be safe, you know?

No. Everything is going...

Happy birthday.

Happy birthday, Papa.

"Happy birthday from Heinz."

Thank you, Heinz.

Thank you, boys.

So they treated you pretty well?

For a prisoner. We didn't know why.

It turns out Terezin was a showcase camp to fool the Red Cross.

Sometimes they'd let our best musicians play for us.

What is this music?

Schubert?

No.

It's composed by Viktor Ullmann.

The one with the bow tie.

It's nice.

Yeah.

Here, sir. I saved the best one for you.

It's perfect for sauerkraut.

Yes, Heller, it has good color.

Sir, may I take water to the orchestra?

They say music helps us prisoners work harder.

All right, Heller, but don't linger.

Thank you.

I like your music, Mr. Ullmann.

Thank you.

Herbert Heller.

Thank you, Mister.

For most of you, your time at Terezin is through.

Tomorrow you shall be transported to other facilities.

The names of those leaving and departure times are posted on the wall.

You won't need a suitcase.

Clothes will be provided for you at the new facility.

It's not there.

It's not there.

It's a good thing, Herbert.

It's a good thing. Trust me.

It's a good thing.

You're such a brave boy.

The best boy in the world, you know.

Sir, I believe you forgot my name on the list by mistake.

Forgot?!

What makes a Jewish boy impudent enough to accuse the Reich of a mistake?

Oh no sir, I didn't mean mistake.

It's just the rest of my family is scheduled for transport and I'm not.

I'd be left alone in Theresienstadt.

Right now, alone in Theresienstadt is a good thing to be.

Sir, this was intentional. We feel young Heller is an asset.

He speaks good German, is a productive worker in the garden,

and has an unusually clean nature for a Jew.

Yes sir, I am a good worker, but I will be wherever I am sent.

So you would prefer to go with your family rather than stay with us?

Since Heller believes we've made a mistake,

I'm inclined to fulfill his request.

Sir, thank you very much.

Best hurry, Heller, you don't want to miss your train.

Yes, sir!

I would soon learn why big decisions shouldn't be made by young boys.

I had just begged to go to Auschwitz Death Camp,

where they would murder 1.1 million of us.

Herbert, no!

So that's why your parents cried when you followed them.

Trying to protect you.

Worry about yourself now.

If you're 13, tell them you're 16.

If you're 40, tell them you're 30.

If you're tired, tell them you're strong.

Where are they taking them?

When Mengele doesn't think you're strong enough,

you will end up there too.

I came face to face with Dr. Josef Mengele.

I didn't know about the thousands he had killed and tortured.

Doesn't hurt that bad, does it?

-I'm Alvy. -I'm Herbert.

He didn't look like a doctor at all.

He had a swagger stick and a monocle.

-Sprechen Sie Deutsch? -Nein.

It's okay. I speak your ugly language.

Eyes are pink more than red.

Blue lips...

flat chest, pale skin.

I can see.

You want to cough, don't you?

You're holding your breath.

Tuberculosis.

I didn't know what to do.

I just stood there.

Finally, I flexed muscles I didn't even have.

I can work.

To the right.

Faster!

Why me?

Why you?

You know, why did you pick me to tell your story to?

I've tried to tell it before but...

I didn't want to upset anyone, but...

I already am upset.

Maybe it's because you don't make me nervous.

Or maybe it's because I want to hear your story.

Here.

Muscles.

Muscles.

So remember, outpatient

basically just changes where you sleep.

You'll still be here 12 hours a day.

And what about Herbert?

I'm only allowing this because of the progress you've made with Herbert.

-So we're still gonna-- -Yes, you'll keep working with him.

I thought you were going to try and keep me here forever.

No, I look forward to you being a distant memory.

Because that'll mean I've done my job

and you're out in the world, sober, living the good life.

You can call me 24/7.

Remember, you're used to this place.

The outside world...

transition can be harsh.

I got Japanese.

Your fave.

I love these bento boxes.

Why do you love bento boxes?

Everything has its own perfect little compartment.

So the miso doesn't get into the rice

and the dashi doesn't get into the edamame.

It's nice.

Okay.

I'm just trying to make things nice for you, Abbey.

That's why I tried making things work with your dad even when it was...

difficult.

Did it for you.

Not for me.

Why do you think you survived?

I've often wondered that.

Why me? Why did I get to live?

It is true that...

I always managed to find the right job.

At Auschwitz, I was assigned a job at the first aid station.

It took some finagling.

You see, the aid station had water.

I learned if I drank as much as I could,

it'd keep hunger pains down.

And at Auschwitz, this was a luxury, to not be in pain from starvation.

The aid station I was also at the center of things.

I remember I could see Heinz coming back from work at day's end.

Once a week, I could cross the camp

to see my mother through the fence.

I tried not to look shocked by her appearance.

Hi, Mama.

You still look pretty.

I love you too.

Even between the fences,

we still found ways to care for each other.

It may seem foolish, taking risks for such small gestures,

but these little resistances made us feel alive.

-Get this to Herbert. -All right.

Papa!

I could see Auschwitz taking its toll even on my father.

Stay here.

I soon learned why.

Shall I fill mine now?

No. I will do it.

One day, I was assigned to work with him.

We knew the oldest

and the youngest were killed right away.

We tried mostly not to think about it.

Papa, please. We must go.

Come on.

Please, Papa.

What do they do with it?

They make snot rags for the SS.

Herbert, let's go. Let's go.

-Are you all right?

Yes. Yeah.

Things got bad enough that some tried to escape.

I'm so tired of having to remind you all

that any attempts to escape is a capital crime.

And pointless.

The prisoner shall be left up here as a reminder to you.

Focus on your work. Lose any fantasy of escape.

Herbert, stay here.

Herbert.

Still, some tried to escape.

But you see, there was only one way they could succeed.

The camp was surrounded by an electrified fence.

Sir, you don't have to do this.

-Herbert, stop! -Please, sir. Don't do it.

So, one moment of shock

and an end to all suffering.

Did you ever consider it?

Why do you ask, Abbey?

Like you said,

one moment of shock, end all the suffering.

Look, Auschwitz was a place that offered very few choices.

I made the choice to believe in my father.

So you never considered it?

Never is a long time.

It happens on the road crews all the time.

It's almost unavoidable.

I heard they sent one of the younger road crews to work at another camp.

Yes, Karel.

I'm sure you're right.

Please sit down.

Mr. Ullman?

Mr. Heller.

This is the composer, Viktor Ullman.

I know him from Terezin.

Mr. Ullman...

I'm afraid it is broken.

Should I go to the hospital?

-No, sir. This is a bad idea. -The boy is right.

I'll do my best to set the bone.

Wrap it tight as I can.

Almost as good as a cast.

Shall I get more bandages?

Yes. And plaster, if you can find it.

If not we'll use mud. Herbert...

Be careful.

Mengele was fascinated by identical twins.

He used them for medical experiments.

We learned to avoid the hospital at all costs.

At night, my father tried to lift my spirits.

What is the first thing you want to do when we come back home?

I want to go to the circus.

Remember how Heinz was afraid?

Especially the clowns.

I wanted to believe anything he said.

He was the only positive force in my world. You see?

I know this is hard.

But when this war is over, we will be reunited.

I see us all sitting at the dinner table.

We're laughing, we're telling jokes.

You're married...

You have your own children.

And maybe I can take them to the circus.

Do you want to know how I did it?

What?

The magic trick with the needle.

When you rub metal on silk, it magnetizes it

and this way, it will always point to true north.

Your mother always uses a silk thread with a triple stitch on top.

Papa.

Something broke inside me after that.

I felt my time was coming soon but...

I wanted to leave my mark.

I wanted the world to know I had existed.

So, yes,

finally the hum of the fence began to call me.

Herbert, come with me now.

Please, Herbert.

There's still work needs to be done.

Would you have done it if he hadn't stopped you?

I chose to believe my father.

Why? I mean, he was wrong so many times.

Because he was my father and because he was good at magic.

Excuse me, I need to utilize the facilities.

-Sorry. I'm sorry. I... -No, no, no. It's all right.

I don't mind. Yeah, so tell me about this.

I don't know. It's just like, it's like a thing I do.

To know people.

Yeah, I mean...

I understand.

You do?

Look, Abbey.

From a very young age, I became something of an expert at hiding.

I'm not sure I ever stopped.

So tell me...

what do you find in the secret drawers?

Sometimes stuff you don't want to.

You know, it wasn't just the magic.

I needed something. Someone to believe in.

Come. I'll give you a ride home.

Actually, can I... can I show you something?

-Of course. -Cool. Yeah.

Yeah.

-So you can just drop me like right here. -Are you sure?

I can take you all the way home. -Yeah. No, no.

No, this is good.

Abbey... thank you.

That's the first time I've heard that music in 60 years.

Yeah, I mean, yeah, no problem.

Do you ever feel guilty?

For...?

For having made it and still being alive?

Perhaps.

Okay.

We are going for a little walk today.

Those who can't keep pace...

well, let's just say,

make sure you do keep pace.

Biggest trees in the world come from the smallest little pine cones.

All the roots are connected with each other.

So that's why some of them get to be like 2,000 years old.

'Cause they're just so frickin' hard to kill.

What, like fireproof?

Yeah. Well, so if you go a couple hours north,

the Avenue of the Giants, there's this one tree.

The Immortal Tree. It's survived, like, fires and floods and lightning strikes.

Like, loggers in 1908 tried to cut it down, and they just gave up.

So there's an axe about 20 feet up on the stump.

We should go there.

For real?

Yeah, like for your birthday or something.

I'll steal a car.

Yeah.

Wait.

It'd be more honest to make, like, a real statement.

It's 4 a.m.

Where have you been?

In the park.

I need a break from your fucking drama.

I'm getting a drink.

Your mother and I drove all over town looking for you.

We almost called the cops.

Abbey?

Abbey!

Maybe your...

So where's Abbey?

Unfortunately, she didn't show up for check-in this morning.

So we've informed her family. That's all we can do.

Let's not focus on that.

We'll just continue.

You want to maybe get a tester for sound?

So her...

Hi. You know, if you don't come in out of the rain,

then I just have to bring an umbrella over to keep you dry.

Abbey...

I know it feels like it's the end of the world but it's not.

I know that. I saw the end of the world.

I had a ringside seat for it.

Do you remember you asked me if I felt guilty for surviving?

You remember?

Well, every day I wonder,

how is it that I lived and my brother didn't?

How did I live when my father did not?

So yes,

I felt guilty

for decades...

and then I began to tell you my story.

I mean, it wasn't your fault that they died.

You know, if it was,

then maybe you would feel guilty.

You haven't heard my whole story.

Goodbye.

Please, Mr. Waldman, you must keep pace.

It will be dark soon. Then we can eat and rest.

You're a good soul, Herbert.

I know your people are not religious, but there is a quote in the Talmud.

...don't be daunted by the grief of the world.

You're not obligated to complete the work that needs to be done,

but neither are you free to abandon it.

Why are you telling me this?

Because, Herbert, I'm too tired.

What could that be?

Do you think I should chance it?

Yes, but wait a moment.

I'll try something.

Quick, you old dog!

Even you know by now you're gonna lose this war.

This was all for nothing.

You see, I got my chance, but Mr. Waldman was dead.

For five days, I walked along and I...

I had to keep that sack hidden.

And when I finally opened it, I couldn't believe my luck.

Inside the bag was a set of men's clothes

large enough to fit over my own.

I realized I had to actually follow the troops

to have any chance of finding my way to a train station.

Come on. 897 leaving for Prague.

Mother, mother, where are you?

I don't think I've seen you wear those shoes before.

Yeah, I don't know. I...

I used to wear 'em when I met up with my friend Sabrina.

Are you supposed to meet Sabrina here?

We don't talk anymore.

Could we just get back to your story?

After all I had lost, I also lost my fear.

I needed some victory, even a small one.

Stop!

Stop in the name of the postal service.

So I finally did get back to Prague,

but it was a Prague I did not recognize.

Stop! Stop or we'll shoot!

Stop!

Stop!

I knew I needed to find a place to hide before curfew.

I'd learned to recognize desperate faces.

There was only one place left to go.

However, the war changed people.

Friends would turn you in just to survive.

But, Mrs. Krall took a big risk.

Bet it was your mother's stitch on top, wasn't it?

I saved this for you.

Keep this.

I know they wanted to shame you with this,

but one day, I think it will become a badge of courage.

There was one last piece of evidence to get rid of.

Back in those days, they used acid to clean the enamel.

And I used the acid and... see, that's why it's...

that's why it's so ugly.

So that's how that happened.

When it was done, I rewarded myself.

-How? -The best way, of course.

It's time that I drive you home.

It's really, it's honestly really fine.

Abbey, I'm not going to leave you here alone.

It's getting dark and besides, you haven't told me your story yet, huh?

It's good?

I think it's this way.

I've always felt different from other people.

Isolated.

Then I met someone who just got me.

Yeah, it wasn't, I wasn't stealing or anything.

I get it. One photo to sum up a whole person.

Not whole.

Where'd you score the vintage Brownie?

My dad's a photographer.

How'd you know it was Brownie?

Seen one before.

I've gotta go.

If you ask me what the wrong thing I did was...

everyone thinks my overdose was accidental.

But it just wasn't.

It was before I met you.

You once said I had good self-worth.

Truth is, I started because I wanted to know my worth.

Elite Escort Agency.

Sounded glamorous.

A lot of men found me pretty.

Found out my worth.

Three hundred and seventy-five dollars.

-Ready? -What kind of camera is that?

This camera is a Brownie Hawkeye.

I had no idea he was your dad.

Fuck him straight to hell.

Had that kind of pain that...

it just felt like there was one answer for.

So...

we made a pact.

By the time I could do anything,

she was already gone.

I just panicked.

I just, I don't know,

I just hid all the evidence.

I tried to save her. I really did. I really tried to save her.

But you know...

the worst part is that I wish I was gone.

It's like... it's like I killed her.

It's like... it's like it's my fault.

I think we should get some air.

I hid for a long time.

-With your secret? -No. In Mrs. Krall's attic.

I had to stay hidden in the attic

to keep the Kralls safe, even during the bomb raids

when everyone else was in the cellar,

because you could not trust anyone.

Not even your neighbors.

One day the Nazis were chased from the city.

Yes. You have to go.

And the war soon ended.

It was over.

The war was over.

Though damaged, the streets felt very alive.

For months, every day, I would go to the Red Cross.

I would give the names and the numbers;

my father, my mother, my brother.

Each day, I would hope for some word.

Thank you.

Then one day,

the most beautiful day...

For the rest of her life, my mother never spoke of the camps,

or how she survived.

Not to me or anyone else.

This is mine.

I built it with so many people,

help from so many, the living and the dead.

For all those decades, I kept the secrets.

I suppose I kept it

because I thought they should have lived instead of me.

But that's not what happened.

I was the one who lived.

What if they knew it was your fault that they died?

It's okay. It'll be....

That's not true. That's a lie.

The same lie my father told me so many times. But...

that lie kept me alive.

I think maybe it also kept me stuck.

Look, Abbey, I do think things will be okay.

I don't know for sure, but...

What?

But I do know, tonight... my secret ends, and that's because of you.

And maybe yours could too.

That's a cool stroller.

I designed it myself.

Had it custom-built in Japan.

No shit. I'm...

Looks really sturdy.

It's been tested up to 160 pounds.

No way.

No shit.

Make a right turn at the zebra.

Come here. I got him.

Faster. Come on. Faster now.

Abbey?

It wasn't that weird

that I was pushing you around in a stroller like a little kid, was it?

Not really.

I have a feeling it's something I'll be experiencing quite a lot

in the near future.

What a nice house.

Yeah.

-I really want to thank you. -Abbey...

At the fence,

I made my own decision.

Sabrina made her decision, not because of you.

And now, you have to decide how you're going to live your life.

But.. what are you supposed to do when you've done something unforgivable?

You forgive yourself.

I've held on to this for 60 years.

Now it's time to let it go.

No. I... I can't.

You've had your own journey...

I'm so sorry.

You tried to tell me so many times.

-I'm sorry. -It's okay.

Someone said,

"Secrets are like a prison, and not just for the people keeping the secret."

So if that's the case, then...

maybe telling the truth,

the real truth, not just some acceptable truth,

can liberate you,

and it can liberate the people around you

and free you from fear, loneliness,

guilt.

I'd like to introduce you all to my good friend, Herbert Heller.

Because of Abbey,

I'm able to tell my story today.

And now I'm sharing it with you lovely people.

At least it gets you out of class.

Sixty years is a long time to hold on to a secret.

You're just not worried that even though if they...

if they catch you, they would shoot you.

You can overcome fright.

I tell students that if they have things not happening to them

which they're happy about,

that they have enough strength and willpower,

they can overcome that.

Drove by and I saw you, and I had to give you a hug.

Thank you. I'm so glad that you remember. Well, thank you.

And I always talked... talk about you to people.

Really? Thank you.

And I always tell people

that you were the most important thing that happened to me in high school.

-Oh, my God. -So thank you so much.

Well, thank you. Don't be sad. It had a good ending.

It had a good ending.

-Yeah. -It's got a good ending. So thank you.

-Thank you. -Thank you for remembering.

-Thank you. -It's fantastic.

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