Original subtitles

We begin with the battle over Trump's

We begin with the battle over Trump's

We begin with the battle over Trump's immigration crackdown. As the situation

immigration crackdown. As the situation

immigration crackdown. As the situation gets more and more out of hand, the

gets more and more out of hand, the

gets more and more out of hand, the people behind it are starting to feel

people behind it are starting to feel

people behind it are starting to feel the heat, and one person cannot be

the heat, and one person cannot be

the heat, and one person cannot be contained.

contained.

contained. >> Christine Nome and Steven Miller are

>> Christine Nome and Steven Miller are

>> Christine Nome and Steven Miller are liars. Any administration that allows

liars. Any administration that allows

liars. Any administration that allows them to continue in office is rotten to

them to continue in office is rotten to

them to continue in office is rotten to its core.

its core.

its core. >> Oh, [cheering]

>> Oh, [cheering]

>> Oh, [cheering] wow. Samuel L. Schumer over here. You

wow. Samuel L. Schumer over here. You

wow. Samuel L. Schumer over here. You kiss your lobbyist with that mouth.

kiss your lobbyist with that mouth.

kiss your lobbyist with that mouth. Guess a video like that is one way to

Guess a video like that is one way to

Guess a video like that is one way to get our attention, but I think it might

get our attention, but I think it might

get our attention, but I think it might be even more effective if you just cut

be even more effective if you just cut

be even more effective if you just cut it off a little bit earlier.

it off a little bit earlier.

it off a little bit earlier. >> Christy Nome and Steven Miller ARE

>> Christy Nome and Steven Miller ARE

>> Christy Nome and Steven Miller ARE [laughter]

>> OKAY, now I'm listening. Spill the tea,

>> OKAY, now I'm listening. Spill the tea,

>> OKAY, now I'm listening. Spill the tea, girl.

girl.

girl. So, yeah, Schumer came in pretty hot,

So, yeah, Schumer came in pretty hot,

So, yeah, Schumer came in pretty hot, but other Democrats are trying to bring

but other Democrats are trying to bring

but other Democrats are trying to bring down the volume just a little. What do

down the volume just a little. What do

down the volume just a little. What do you make of the president's fullthroated

you make of the president's fullthroated

you make of the president's fullthroated support of Christy Gnome?

[laughter]

We don't have sound.

We don't have sound.

We don't have sound. I think we're muted here.

I think we're muted here.

I think we're muted here. >> Yes. Good afternoon, Chris.

>> Yes. Good afternoon, Chris.

>> Yes. Good afternoon, Chris. >> Nailed it. I couldn't have not said it

>> Nailed it. I couldn't have not said it

>> Nailed it. I couldn't have not said it better myself. So let's assume that at

better myself. So let's assume that at

better myself. So let's assume that at some point the Democrats can express

some point the Democrats can express

some point the Democrats can express themselves at a normal volume somewhere

themselves at a normal volume somewhere

themselves at a normal volume somewhere between zero and Lewis Black. [laughter]

between zero and Lewis Black. [laughter]

between zero and Lewis Black. [laughter] >> What do they want?

>> What do they want?

>> What do they want? >> They are demanding three specific

>> They are demanding three specific

>> They are demanding three specific changes and roving ICE patrols across

changes and roving ICE patrols across

changes and roving ICE patrols across the country. An updated uniform code of

the country. An updated uniform code of

the country. An updated uniform code of conduct and accountability for

conduct and accountability for

conduct and accountability for immigration enforcement, body cams on

immigration enforcement, body cams on

immigration enforcement, body cams on all agents, as well as proper

all agents, as well as proper

all agents, as well as proper identification and no masks.

identification and no masks.

identification and no masks. Okay, good to see Democrats pushing for

Okay, good to see Democrats pushing for

Okay, good to see Democrats pushing for some reforms. Is this everything that

some reforms. Is this everything that

some reforms. Is this everything that needs to change about ICE? No. Is it a

needs to change about ICE? No. Is it a

needs to change about ICE? No. Is it a start? Yes. Am I going to keep asking

start? Yes. Am I going to keep asking

start? Yes. Am I going to keep asking myself questions and then answering

myself questions and then answering

myself questions and then answering them? No. This is my last one. Can I ask

them? No. This is my last one. Can I ask

them? No. This is my last one. Can I ask one more? Fine.

one more? Fine.

one more? Fine. But let's move on to the big exciting

But let's move on to the big exciting

But let's move on to the big exciting event that we have all been waiting for.

event that we have all been waiting for.

event that we have all been waiting for. Everyone's going. You know what I'm

Everyone's going. You know what I'm

Everyone's going. You know what I'm talking about. The new Melania movie.

talking about. The new Melania movie.

talking about. The new Melania movie. [cheering]

>> Oh, someone didn't get their tickets in

>> Oh, someone didn't get their tickets in

>> Oh, someone didn't get their tickets in time. Don't be mad.

time. Don't be mad.

time. Don't be mad. But if you haven't seen the trailer, get

But if you haven't seen the trailer, get

But if you haven't seen the trailer, get ready to be blown away. Here we go

ready to be blown away. Here we go

ready to be blown away. Here we go again.

>> Hi, Mr. President. Congratulations.

>> Hi, Mr. President. Congratulations.

>> Hi, Mr. President. Congratulations. >> Did you watch it?

>> Did you watch it?

>> Did you watch it? >> I did not. Yeah.

I did not. Yeah, I I was going to, but

I did not. Yeah, I I was going to, but

I did not. Yeah, I I was going to, but then I didn't.

then I didn't.

then I didn't. Now, when you first heard that there was

Now, when you first heard that there was

Now, when you first heard that there was going to be a documentary about Melania,

going to be a documentary about Melania,

going to be a documentary about Melania, you probably thought, "Oh, or huh, or

you probably thought, "Oh, or huh, or

you probably thought, "Oh, or huh, or why, or can I undo my lasic?" But Amazon

why, or can I undo my lasic?" But Amazon

why, or can I undo my lasic?" But Amazon believed in this movie a lot. Like

believed in this movie a lot. Like

believed in this movie a lot. Like suspiciously a lot. Bezos and Amazon are

suspiciously a lot. Bezos and Amazon are

suspiciously a lot. Bezos and Amazon are paying $40 million for a documentary on

paying $40 million for a documentary on

paying $40 million for a documentary on Melania Trump.

Melania Trump.

Melania Trump. >> The most expensive licensing fee ever

>> The most expensive licensing fee ever

>> The most expensive licensing fee ever paid for a documentary. Amazon paid

paid for a documentary. Amazon paid

paid for a documentary. Amazon paid nearly three times more than the next

nearly three times more than the next

nearly three times more than the next highest bidder.

highest bidder.

highest bidder. >> The first lady will reportedly walk away

>> The first lady will reportedly walk away

>> The first lady will reportedly walk away with at least $28 million.

with at least $28 million.

with at least $28 million. Huh?

Huh?

Huh? Why? Why would Jeff Bezos, a billionaire

Why? Why would Jeff Bezos, a billionaire

Why? Why would Jeff Bezos, a billionaire who has tons of business with a

who has tons of business with a

who has tons of business with a government run by a famously corrupt

government run by a famously corrupt

government run by a famously corrupt president known for loving bribes,

president known for loving bribes,

president known for loving bribes, overpay for a Melania documentary? H,

overpay for a Melania documentary? H,

overpay for a Melania documentary? H, let me think.

Well, that didn't help.

Well, that didn't help.

Well, that didn't help. But whatever else this is, they made a

But whatever else this is, they made a

But whatever else this is, they made a real movie. They even got director Brett

real movie. They even got director Brett

real movie. They even got director Brett Ratner, who you might know from Rush

Ratner, who you might know from Rush

Ratner, who you might know from Rush Hour or the Me Too movement, and they're

Hour or the Me Too movement, and they're

Hour or the Me Too movement, and they're [laughter]

and they're spending a ton of money

and they're spending a ton of money

and they're spending a ton of money promoting it, which is why we're seeing

promoting it, which is why we're seeing

promoting it, which is why we're seeing Melania all over Fox News doing

Melania all over Fox News doing

Melania all over Fox News doing interviews and they've been asking her

interviews and they've been asking her

interviews and they've been asking her fascinating questions.

fascinating questions.

fascinating questions. >> How does it feel being first lady for

>> How does it feel being first lady for

>> How does it feel being first lady for the second time around? It's quite

the second time around? It's quite

the second time around? It's quite extraordinary. What is your favorite

extraordinary. What is your favorite

extraordinary. What is your favorite part of the movie when we all go to

part of the movie when we all go to

part of the movie when we all go to watch it this weekend?

watch it this weekend?

watch it this weekend? >> When he's doing the YMCA, how do you

>> When he's doing the YMCA, how do you

>> When he's doing the YMCA, how do you feel?

feel?

feel? >> Fostering the future AI. I mean, what

>> Fostering the future AI. I mean, what

>> Fostering the future AI. I mean, what haven't you done? Tell us about the

haven't you done? Tell us about the

haven't you done? Tell us about the future.

future.

future. >> I've always been curious. What is your

>> I've always been curious. What is your

>> I've always been curious. What is your favorite time of day?

>> I was told there'd be no gotcha

>> I was told there'd be no gotcha

>> I was told there'd be no gotcha questions. [laughter]

questions. [laughter]

questions. [laughter] What is your favorite time of day? That

What is your favorite time of day? That

What is your favorite time of day? That sounds like the conversation you have

sounds like the conversation you have

sounds like the conversation you have with a co-orker spouse when they show up

with a co-orker spouse when they show up

with a co-orker spouse when they show up to the holiday party before your

to the holiday party before your

to the holiday party before your coworker does. So, um, do you always eat

coworker does. So, um, do you always eat

coworker does. So, um, do you always eat orves or

orves or

orves or I got to go to the bathroom?

I got to go to the bathroom?

I got to go to the bathroom? I will say I don't want to put all the

I will say I don't want to put all the

I will say I don't want to put all the blame on the interviewers because

blame on the interviewers because

blame on the interviewers because Melania is not really giving them a lot

Melania is not really giving them a lot

Melania is not really giving them a lot to work with.

to work with.

to work with. >> I I got the special score for that

>> I I got the special score for that

>> I I got the special score for that movie, my original score that it's

movie, my original score that it's

movie, my original score that it's called Melania's Vaults.

called Melania's Vaults.

called Melania's Vaults. >> Wow. And where does that original score

>> Wow. And where does that original score

>> Wow. And where does that original score come from?

come from?

come from? >> It's specially made for the movie.

>> It's specially made for the movie.

>> It's specially made for the movie. >> How wonderful.

>> How wonderful.

>> How wonderful. >> [laughter]

>> Wow. The original score for this movie

>> Wow. The original score for this movie

>> Wow. The original score for this movie was made for this movie, you say? And

was made for this movie, you say? And

was made for this movie, you say? And did they hit record when they were

did they hit record when they were

did they hit record when they were filming? Oh, how wonderful. Well, here's

filming? Oh, how wonderful. Well, here's

filming? Oh, how wonderful. Well, here's $40 million.

$40 million.

$40 million. So, all right. This isn't one of those

So, all right. This isn't one of those

So, all right. This isn't one of those interesting Timothy Shalamé press tours,

interesting Timothy Shalamé press tours,

interesting Timothy Shalamé press tours, but that's not important. What's

but that's not important. What's

but that's not important. What's important is what this movie is about.

important is what this movie is about.

important is what this movie is about. Just uh what is it about?

Just uh what is it about?

Just uh what is it about? >> This story was never told before. So the

>> This story was never told before. So the

>> This story was never told before. So the audience will see me, how I manage my

audience will see me, how I manage my

audience will see me, how I manage my business, uh my philanthropy,

business, uh my philanthropy,

business, uh my philanthropy, family, uh preparation for the

family, uh preparation for the

family, uh preparation for the inauguration and also establishing the

inauguration and also establishing the

inauguration and also establishing the east wing uh for the White House. Oh,

east wing uh for the White House. Oh,

east wing uh for the White House. Oh, no one's told her. [cheering]

no one's told her. [cheering]

no one's told her. [cheering] Oh god. Oh, I love the East Wing,

Oh god. Oh, I love the East Wing,

Oh god. Oh, I love the East Wing, especially how it will always be there.

especially how it will always be there.

especially how it will always be there. [laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter] Is this whole movie just her talking

Is this whole movie just her talking

Is this whole movie just her talking about things that she loves that are no

about things that she loves that are no

about things that she loves that are no longer here? Oh, uh, my passions. Uh,

longer here? Oh, uh, my passions. Uh,

longer here? Oh, uh, my passions. Uh, decorating the East Wing. Uh, chatting

decorating the East Wing. Uh, chatting

decorating the East Wing. Uh, chatting with Dilbert creator Scott Adams. Uh,

with Dilbert creator Scott Adams. Uh,

with Dilbert creator Scott Adams. Uh, let's see what else.

let's see what else.

let's see what else. But whether this movie was a legitimate

But whether this movie was a legitimate

But whether this movie was a legitimate piece of art or a cash grab, it was a

piece of art or a cash grab, it was a

piece of art or a cash grab, it was a cash grab. So, I'm sure everyone

cash grab. So, I'm sure everyone

cash grab. So, I'm sure everyone involved with this project is very proud

involved with this project is very proud

involved with this project is very proud of the work that they've done.

of the work that they've done.

of the work that they've done. >> Rolling Stone is reporting twothirds of

>> Rolling Stone is reporting twothirds of

>> Rolling Stone is reporting twothirds of the film's New York crew asked not to be

the film's New York crew asked not to be

the film's New York crew asked not to be credited.

[applause]

[applause]

[applause] [cheering]

>> You didn't want to be in the credits,

>> You didn't want to be in the credits,

>> You didn't want to be in the credits, but how will they know who to give the

but how will they know who to give the

but how will they know who to give the trophy to at the FIFA Academy Awards?

trophy to at the FIFA Academy Awards?

trophy to at the FIFA Academy Awards? And you know that this is bad because

And you know that this is bad because

And you know that this is bad because people in Hollywood love taking credit.

people in Hollywood love taking credit.

people in Hollywood love taking credit. It is their favorite thing to do. By the

It is their favorite thing to do. By the

It is their favorite thing to do. By the way, I was the first person to make that

way, I was the first person to make that

way, I was the first person to make that point.

point.

point. Of course, the big question is, is the

Of course, the big question is, is the

Of course, the big question is, is the Melania documentary worth seeing? To

Melania documentary worth seeing? To

Melania documentary worth seeing? To find out, let's go to our critics's

find out, let's go to our critics's

find out, let's go to our critics's corner with Ronnie Chang and Michael

corner with Ronnie Chang and Michael

corner with Ronnie Chang and Michael Costa. [cheering]

[applause]

[applause]

[applause] >> Michael, let's start with you. What did

>> Michael, let's start with you. What did

>> Michael, let's start with you. What did you think,

you think,

you think, >> Desi? Melania was a terrible movie. It

>> Desi? Melania was a terrible movie. It

>> Desi? Melania was a terrible movie. It was nothing but pure bribery. I was

was nothing but pure bribery. I was

was nothing but pure bribery. I was disgusted by this naked attempt by Jeff

disgusted by this naked attempt by Jeff

disgusted by this naked attempt by Jeff Bezos to curry favor with the president.

Bezos to curry favor with the president.

Bezos to curry favor with the president. I give it thumbs down. [laughter] Okay,

I give it thumbs down. [laughter] Okay,

I give it thumbs down. [laughter] Okay, I'm I'm sorry. I don't know what movie

I'm I'm sorry. I don't know what movie

I'm I'm sorry. I don't know what movie you were watching, Michael, because I

you were watching, Michael, because I

you were watching, Michael, because I personally found the bribery artful and

personally found the bribery artful and

personally found the bribery artful and cinematic. I mean, that was a real tour

cinematic. I mean, that was a real tour

cinematic. I mean, that was a real tour the force of corruption structurally,

the force of corruption structurally,

the force of corruption structurally, tonally, movie worked in every way. I

tonally, movie worked in every way. I

tonally, movie worked in every way. I knew exactly what was going going on in

knew exactly what was going going on in

knew exactly what was going going on in every single scene. Crime.

every single scene. Crime.

every single scene. Crime. I give it two thumbs up.

I give it two thumbs up.

I give it two thumbs up. >> Look, look, look. I'm not a prude. I'm

>> Look, look, look. I'm not a prude. I'm

>> Look, look, look. I'm not a prude. I'm not against a little bribery in a movie,

not against a little bribery in a movie,

not against a little bribery in a movie, but this was obscene. If I want to see

but this was obscene. If I want to see

but this was obscene. If I want to see bribery that hardcore, I'll watch it on

bribery that hardcore, I'll watch it on

bribery that hardcore, I'll watch it on my phone in the bathroom after my wife

my phone in the bathroom after my wife

my phone in the bathroom after my wife goes to sleep.

goes to sleep.

goes to sleep. >> No, no, I'm sorry. I I love the bribery

>> No, no, I'm sorry. I I love the bribery

>> No, no, I'm sorry. I I love the bribery in this. Okay. It wasn't gratuitous. It

in this. Okay. It wasn't gratuitous. It

in this. Okay. It wasn't gratuitous. It was saying something relevant. All

was saying something relevant. All

was saying something relevant. All right. Every movie could use more

right. Every movie could use more

right. Every movie could use more bribery. I'm looking at you, Hamnut.

bribery. I'm looking at you, Hamnut.

bribery. I'm looking at you, Hamnut. Well, I'm Shakespeare. My baby died.

Well, I'm Shakespeare. My baby died.

Well, I'm Shakespeare. My baby died. Okay, I'm I'm sorry. How does that

Okay, I'm I'm sorry. How does that

Okay, I'm I'm sorry. How does that enrich the president of the United

enrich the president of the United

enrich the president of the United States in 2026?

States in 2026?

States in 2026? >> Okay, guys. Guys, let me let me just

>> Okay, guys. Guys, let me let me just

>> Okay, guys. Guys, let me let me just ask, is the bribery in this movie

ask, is the bribery in this movie

ask, is the bribery in this movie appropriate for families? I I'm kind of

appropriate for families? I I'm kind of

appropriate for families? I I'm kind of worried that my 5-year-old might not be

worried that my 5-year-old might not be

worried that my 5-year-old might not be mature enough to see strong bribery

mature enough to see strong bribery

mature enough to see strong bribery themes or situations.

themes or situations.

themes or situations. >> Oh,

>> Oh,

>> Oh, it'll be fine. The bribery will go right

it'll be fine. The bribery will go right

it'll be fine. The bribery will go right over her head. I I don't I don't know,

over her head. I I don't I don't know,

over her head. I I don't I don't know, Ronnie. This bribery is so overt. You'd

Ronnie. This bribery is so overt. You'd

Ronnie. This bribery is so overt. You'd have to be pretty stupid to miss it.

have to be pretty stupid to miss it.

have to be pretty stupid to miss it. >> Yeah. Yeah, I guess I guess that's true.

>> Yeah. Yeah, I guess I guess that's true.

>> Yeah. Yeah, I guess I guess that's true. Uh Desi, how stupid is your 5-year-old?

Uh Desi, how stupid is your 5-year-old?

Uh Desi, how stupid is your 5-year-old? >> Um average stupid.

>> Um average stupid.

>> Um average stupid. >> Yeah, it should be fine. It should be

>> Yeah, it should be fine. It should be

>> Yeah, it should be fine. It should be okay. It should be okay.

okay. It should be okay.

okay. It should be okay. >> Well, guys, I know it's early, but are

>> Well, guys, I know it's early, but are

>> Well, guys, I know it's early, but are you hearing any awards buzz for this

you hearing any awards buzz for this

you hearing any awards buzz for this thing?

thing?

thing? >> No way. Absolutely not. The only way

>> No way. Absolutely not. The only way

>> No way. Absolutely not. The only way this movie will ever win an Oscar is if

this movie will ever win an Oscar is if

this movie will ever win an Oscar is if the Academy Awards are desperate to stay

the Academy Awards are desperate to stay

the Academy Awards are desperate to stay in the president's good side. So yes, it

in the president's good side. So yes, it

in the president's good side. So yes, it will win an Oscar.

will win an Oscar.

will win an Oscar. >> Okay, I predict this thing is sweeping

>> Okay, I predict this thing is sweeping

>> Okay, I predict this thing is sweeping everything. Okay, the Golden Globes,

everything. Okay, the Golden Globes,

everything. Okay, the Golden Globes, BAFTAs, MTV Movie Awards. The special

BAFTAs, MTV Movie Awards. The special

BAFTAs, MTV Movie Awards. The special effects alone are amazing. Okay, it

effects alone are amazing. Okay, it

effects alone are amazing. Okay, it almost looked like Melania had a 10-ft

almost looked like Melania had a 10-ft

almost looked like Melania had a 10-ft son.

son.

son. >> Ronnie, Ronnie, Ronnie, that was her

>> Ronnie, Ronnie, Ronnie, that was her

>> Ronnie, Ronnie, Ronnie, that was her real son, Baron.

real son, Baron.

real son, Baron. >> What? Oh my god, this movie is blowing

>> What? Oh my god, this movie is blowing

>> What? Oh my god, this movie is blowing my mind.

my mind.

my mind. >> Ronnie, I just I have to ask you

>> Ronnie, I just I have to ask you

>> Ronnie, I just I have to ask you something. You seem to love this movie

something. You seem to love this movie

something. You seem to love this movie and you hate everything. Why are you

and you hate everything. Why are you

and you hate everything. Why are you supporting it so much?

supporting it so much?

supporting it so much? >> What do you mean? I I I love this movie

>> What do you mean? I I I love this movie

>> What do you mean? I I I love this movie because I love the story and the

because I love the story and the

because I love the story and the character arcs and also Jeff Bezos paid

character arcs and also Jeff Bezos paid

character arcs and also Jeff Bezos paid me $40 million

me $40 million

me $40 million to say what I just

to say what I just

to say what I just [applause and cheering] said. I know,

[applause and cheering] said. I know,

[applause and cheering] said. I know, right?

right?

right? That that is disgusting. Cinema is an

That that is disgusting. Cinema is an

That that is disgusting. Cinema is an art that should not be compromised,

art that should not be compromised,

art that should not be compromised, which is why I strongly recommend

which is why I strongly recommend

which is why I strongly recommend Melania.

Melania.

Melania. It's truly a masterpiece. Okay, Ronnie

It's truly a masterpiece. Okay, Ronnie

It's truly a masterpiece. Okay, Ronnie Chang and Michael Costa. Everyone