Original subtitles

THEME SONG: Sam, Clover, Alex, whoo!

We arrive in the fashion world.

We are Totally Spies.

Genuine secret agents.

But we never give into fear.

Sam, Clover, Alex, whoo!

We win every day of the year.

S-P-I-E-S!

We are Totally Spies.

Huh?

Whoa, where am I?

It doesn't matter, because when I'm finished,

no one will care about you or any celebrity.

Except me, of course.

Please, no.

I'm late for set.

MANDY: A little to your right.

What?

I said right, loser.

Incoming.

Um, operating heavy machinery on campus is dangerous, Mandy.

Yeah, especially to us.

What's all this stuff for, anyway?

A talent scout is coming to Mali U,

and I am going to wow him with my signature walk.

Uh, uh, is she serious?

Walking is her talent?

Hm.

Huh?

This I got to see.

You must be Mandy.

Yes.

Cue the music.

Oh.

Uh-oh.

Excellent.

I haven't seen a walk like that since I

signed Helena Goran Goble, world's greatest supermodel.

Unfortunately, you are no Helena.

Goodbye.

Wait.

Don't go.

Can I have do

Pretty please.

I had no idea Oink is a truffle pig.

Girls, incoming WOOHPish.

If I don't make it, baby--

You can't think that way, Johnny.

I have a seriously infected hang nail, babe,

and doctors aren't holding out much hope.

I need you to know how much I love you.

"Love in a Railway Station?"

This is hands down my fave Rad Smitt movie of all time.

Rad is a total cutie.

Question is, why is Jerry watching it?

He obviously has great taste.

Actually, girls, the movie is for research purposes only.

A missing persons report was filed on Rad Smitt

early this morning when he went out for a jog

and never returned.

Oh no.

Rad is in the middle of filming the fourth sequel

in his totally awesome Sunset series.

First, there was "Love in a Railway Station,"

then "Love in a Gas Station," followed

by "Love in a Subway Station."

I hazard to guess what the fourth installment is called.

"Love in a Space Station."

Can you imagine?

Rad's signature hair fluff in zero gravity?

Yeah, I can honestly say no.

You three are to go to Rad's mansion and look for clues.

Well, then, what are we waiting for?

Yeah, load us up, Jer, and we'll be on our way.

You'll need the Frequency Modulator Mood Ring, Buzzsaw

Wristwatch, Icy Fresh Liquid Nitrogen Breath Spray,

Groovy Red Lipstick Laser, and Diamond

Cutter Diamond Earrings.

Oo!

These will look fab when we hang with--

I mean, save Rad Smitt.

I'm sure they will.

Now, goodbye spies, and good luck.

Rad is the number one celebrity in the.

World it's not like we can just go up to the door

and ring the bell.

That's why we've got these.

Cable TV installers?

Great thinking, Sammy.

Now, any idea on how to get through Rad's

state of the art security system and his bodyguard?

Whoa.

Hm.

Time for a little frequency modulation,

courtesy of Jer's mood ring.

I can't believe how seriously Rad

takes his movie memorabilia.

This place is a total shrine.

I can't believe Clover is trying on someone's

ratty old headgear.

"Cowboy Love Story" was not only one of my top

five movies last year, ,,

it totally changed my life.

I now realize how completely cute cowboys can be.

The golden toast award?

Rad was the toast of Tinseltown three years running.

Ew.

Who keeps their nasty old bandages and frames them.

That's not just any bandage, Sammy.

That's the bandage from the movie we

saw playing in Jerry's office.

It won Rad his first platinum orb.

OK, spies.

Time to focus on finding some actual clues.

Quick, hide.

ALL: Rad Smitt?

Who are you, and what are you doing in my closet?

Um.

We're, um, ,, from New Com Cable, here

to upgrade your satellite feed.

Hm.

The question is, are you OK?

You don't look so good.

I'm the leading romantic actor on Earth.

Why wouldn't I be OK?

For starters, your shoes are covered in mud,

and you're inside the house.

Any idea where it came from?

Not to mention the fact that you were reported missing.

How can I be missing when I'm standing right here?

You three know a lot for cable TV installers.

We're just humungo fans.

Think you could do your signature move for me?

Signature move?

ALL: Uh-oh. - Um.

We can explain.

We already filled him in.

See ya.

Time for a little Buzzsaw Wristwatch action.

Hey.

Nice work, Clover.

That was super close.

Ah.

That is totally the cutest thing I've ever seen.

That's Rad's robot sidekick from the flick "Space Junk

Jams."

I take it back.

So not cute.

Yeah?

It wasn't too cute in the film either.

We are not going to cower and let some nuts

and bolts get the best of us.

Eat my super spy dust.

Girls, the balcony.

We can bungee our way out of here.

OK.

That was definitely not in the film.

No worries.

The icy fresh liquid nitrogen breath

spray oughta cool things off.

Ya.

Whoa. That was way weird.

I know.

It was like Brad completely lost his romantic leading guy mojo.

Yeah.

Rad was acting a little strange.

More than a little.

He had no idea how to do his signature

move, the one he's famous for.

And he couldn't remember how he got all that

dried up mud on his sneakers.

Or went missing in the first place.

I'll send Jer the mud sample to see if it holds any clues

and let him know that Rad's returned to his mansion.

Hm.

As much as I hate to leave Bel Air,

we have to get back to school.

Right behind you, Clover.

Let me guess.

You're about to show the world that you

practically invented melodrama?

Whatevs.

Luckily, I managed to convince the talent

scout to give me another shot.

No thanks to that awful porker of ours.

Speaking of Oinky, have you seen him around?

No.

And make sure you keep that hog out of my way.

I'm looking for a serious actress

with serious acting chops.

Serious?

You got it.

Haven't you heard the awful news?

They hated my designs.

I didn't get into fashion school.

Now I'll never my dream of becoming

a world renowned designer.

I've seen enough.

Good day.

Your stupid lame pig is ruining everything.

Yup.

Totally Melodramatic

Hello, girls.

Don't tell me you have the results

of the mud analysis already?

Unfortunately, I'm calling with a slightly

more pressing matter.

International singing sensation, Jason Wiebler

has just been reported missing.

Oh, no.

Not the Jason Wiebler.

Oh, I just love his hit single,

Sweetie, sweetie, sweetie, oh.

That's not all.

There was a third abduction attempt on Spanish soccer

star, Alessandro.

Alessandro is my majorly hot crush.

No one can strike it like Sandro.

Yes.

Well, you girls are to head to Spain

immediately in case another abduction attempt is made.

You've got it, Jer.

When do we leave?

No time like the present.

Whoa.

Wow.

First things first.

We'll need to blend.

Looks like he's got some high tech help.

Huh?

No, my lucky ball.

Sandro's moves definitely defy Gravity We've got to help him.

Grab those balls.

Hey.

Put me down.

Help.

Help.

What is it, Sammy?

You look like you've seen a ghost.

Hm.

Sort of.

There was a CH logo on the zeppelin's tail rudder.

It seems so familiar.

So why can't I place it?

We've got bad news, Jer.

The villain just made off with Alessandro.

Oh, dear.

Any update on that mud?

It's mud from the Hollywood Hills.

You're to head back there and see if you

can unearth any more clues.

That never gets old, Jer.

If we wanted some dirt on Rad, we'd have better luck

watching Excess Bel Air.

Wait.

I think I've got something.

Over here.

Hm?

Hm.

Those footprints definitely belong to Rad Smitt.

OK.

How could you possibly know that, Clover?

While we were hiding in Brad's closet,

I checked out his shoes.

Obs.

Hm.

He had six pairs of identical sneaks

just like the pair he was wearing.

Way to sleuth, Clover.

But it still doesn't explain why they suddenly disappear.

No.

But this does.

A trap door.

Buzzsaw wristwatch, do your thing.

Whoa.

This is some underground lair.

Whoa.

Not just any lair, it's a way posh underground mansion.

What is that?

Oh.

Jason Wiebler.

Alessandro.

Uh-oh.

I think I just figured out what the CH logo in the plane

stands for, Sammy.

Captain Hayes?

I wish I could say it was nice to see

you nosy little spice again.

Unfortunately, I can't, because it isn't.

Let me guess.

You came down with another nasty case

of celebrity worship syndrome.

You should really have yourself checked by a doctor.

Nice try, but I got tired of merely hanging around celebs,

so I decided to become one myself.

Um, don't you have to be, you know, famous to be a celebrity?

A mere technicality, thanks to my trusty machine

that steals talents from the world's greatest stars.

You stole Rad's signature move.

You monster.

I've also stolen Rad's acting chops.

Soon, I'll have Jason Wiebler's singing voice

and Alessandro's soccer moves.

And that's just the beginning.

Oh, no.

Sweetie, sweetie, sweetie, oh.

That sweetie, sweetie, sweetie, oh.

Please always be mine.

No way.

Captain Hayes is a totally talented

singer and soccer player now.

Not to mention completely irresistible.

But there is no way we're falling for it.

Glad you enjoyed the show.

Now, if you'll excuse me, it's time.

When my mansion emerges, they will

rename this the Hayes Hills, after me and my many talents.

What was he talking about, when my mansion emerges?

Who knows?

Most of the villains we deal with are certifiably crazy.

Come on, spies.

We have a quadruple threat to take down, singer, actor,

sports hero, and total louse.

Unfortunately, this cage is made from a carbon

compound as strong as diamonds.

Luckily, nothing cuts through diamonds like diamond

cutter diamond earring.

Great work, clover.

Now let's free Jason Wiebler and Alessandro,

then put an end to Captain Hayes' bogus fame grab.

Right behind you, Sammy.

Oh, you're even cuter in person.

Could I have your autograph?

Uh, I can't believe I'm gonna say this, but enough crushing.

Hello.

There's an international villain down those stairs.

Oh, no.

That sounds like an--

ALL: Earthquake.

Hurry.

We've got a rising star to snuff out.

That definitely explains all the shaking.

Not to mention the mystery of the emerging house.

Captain Hayes is going to make his celebrity

debut along with his mansion.

We have to stop him before he demolishes the world

famous Hollywood Hills.

Unfortunately, you're much too late for that.

Watch out.

Didn't you know that Rad played

a world famous circus performer in one of his many flicks?

Yes, I totally knew that.

I just thought it was special effects.

Consider yourself lucky.

You've got front row seats for the debut of the soon

to be iconic Captain Hayes.

Mm.

This show stinks.

Yeah.

I demand a refund.

Alex, think you can reach into my pocket

and grab the lipstick laser?

I think so. No.

Got it.

Great save, Clover.

Time to immobilize this would-be idol.

Sweetie, sweetie, oh.

Please always be mine.

Way to plunge that loser into super cold obscurity, Sammy.

Hello, girls.

Another job well done, spies.

It's hard to get excited with the Hollywood Hills

in shambles.

Never fear.

A WOOHP disaster cleanup crew is on the way as we speak.

What's gonna happen to the totally unfab Captain Hayes

now?

He'll be going to our WOOHP containment

facility, where the only thing he'll be famous for

is being a criminal.

Don't forget to restore Alessandro to his former glory.

His team's in the semifinals next week.

Yes, yes.

We'll also Jason Wiebler's singing voice and Rad Smitt's

questionable acting ability.

Wouldn't want to deprive the world of "Love

in a Space Station."

Speaking of which, think you can

get us front row tix to his big movie premiere next week?

Hm?

Jer?

Jer?

Oh.

I'm sure he'll get right on it.

This is your last, last chance, Mandy.

Trust me.

You will not be disappointed.

Cue the music.

Sweetie, sweetie, sweetie, oh.

Like, sweetie, sweetie, sweetie.

Sweetie, sweetie, oh.

Like, sweetie, sweetie, sweetie.

I've seen enough.

You mean, you've heard enough, right?

Who is the owner of that precocious pig?

He has perfect timing.

I want to sign him immediately.

His name's Oinky.

Oinky's going to be bigger than Jason Wiebler.

Huh?

That putrescent pig is ruining my life.