Original subtitles

Psychoanalysis was created by Sigmund Freud, a neurologist. Its roots

are scientific.

Psychomagic was created by Alejandro Jodorowsky, a filmmaker and theater

director. Its roots are artistic.

Psychoanalysis is a therapy through words.

Psychomagic... It's a therapy through ASCO.

Psychoanalysis forbids the therapist to touch his patients.

Psychomagic recommends the therapist to touch his consultants.

This way of healing, beyond words, was born to me 50 years ago

in the form of an initiatory massage.

Here is the first...

of my initiatory massages, mother and father of psychomagic.

When I decided to do an art to heal, I left my prison like a ivory

tower and entered the pain of the world.

I used as an instrument a humble game of tarot cards.

And not reading the future, but the present.

When I started reading the present of the people, of the consultants, I got

problems of the family.

They are repetitions of problems of two, three, four and five generations.

Cancers that are repeated, names that are repeated, violations that are

repeated, divorces that are repeated, etc.

I got that.

And from there, from these family problems, I went to the social problems

the cultural problems.

When a person in psychoanalysis has a problem, he is told with words, he

with words,

¿Cuál es el trauma que te produjo esta enfermedad?

Entonces se busca, la persona habla, seis meses, diez meses, ocho años, hasta

que llega a darse cuenta, bueno, estoy enamorado de mi mamá, por ejemplo.

El trauma no se ha solucionado, ¿y ahora qué hago?

¿Qué hago? Ya sé lo que tengo.

¿Qué hago?

Entonces me vi obligado a sanar, es decir, a inventar la psicomagia.

Dalí said he wanted to bring dreams to reality.

I followed the anti -surrealist path, on the contrary.

I said, everything is in the unconscious.

You can't teach the unconscious to speak the language of reality.

You have to teach reason to speak the language of dreams.

This year was the most

difficult year of my life.

All my symptoms have moved to the liver.

My father is someone who is very toxic.

He feeds on the evil, the harm that he continuously does to

his entourage and mainly to his family.

And I am the elder.

I feel him in the deepest part of my being.

In the deepest part.

I used two months of heroin to get

out of this state. I thought about jumping out the window. Every day I

about suicide.

Every day.

I decided to go back to earth

This body of suffering.

I sacrificed my life, my childhood,

to save my brothers and sisters from the evil

of my sick father.

Today I want to die.

Whoopi!

They're going to kill you.

Take the freedom to kill.

Take the freedom to kill.

J 'ai moins d 'idées suicidaires.

Le mode de vie parisien n 'est pas le mien, quoi.

Mais ça, c 'est une révélation. Je le sais.

Ça fait longtemps que j 'ai pas... que j 'ai pas aimé quelqu 'un.

Ça me manque, ça.

D 'aimer quelqu 'un.

Et que ce soit réciproque.

Mais même si ça... voilà, si ça ne perdure pas, de toute façon, rien.

Tout est...

Nothing lasts,

nothing lasts.

It's like life, it's moments, you have to take them.

My mother never loved me.

And because she herself has no relationship with her mother, it's

Because her own mother had a child

with a man she didn't love, who is my mother.

And so today...

I have never been able to communicate with my mother and my father

either.

He is very closed to himself.

He doesn't pay attention at all.

He is only superficial.

My mother always made me feel guilty

because I don't like him.

I know it's not my fault, but you can't hold that to a child.

In my mother's head, I became an adult, except that I was only one and a half

years old.

And so, I've always helped.

Being an adult, in fact, since always, I've never...

I've never had a connection with her.

Do you see yourself in the mirror?

I'm a little scared, actually.

I don't know if I can give life, actually.

Do you love yourself?

I feel happy.

I feel like I love myself more.

I don't feel hate or anger against

my real parents.

I feel very at ease.

I know that my life is going to change today. I know it.

That is to say, the couple, if we want to talk about the couple, the

couple is shaken.

I wouldn't say threatened or avenged, but the couple is shaken in a terrible

way.

I'm in a black rage.

My memories, I erase them.

I am transformed into a woman and every time I erase the memories.

I feel that I was a child who was not

desired because the only sentence I remember of my mother

that she said, fortunately you were

born at home.

Not at the hospital, otherwise I would have thought that there was a mistake in

the person.

Among my eight children in the family, I was the one who suffered the

most. I was beaten all the time, even for nothing at all.

At night, they wake you up to hit you.

Me toucher les seins, me toucher mon corps, mais...

Après, je suis venue en France à l 'âge de

17 ans.

Et c 'est là où j 'ai fait rencontre avec mon père.

J 'ai peur de sentir quelqu 'un qui me protégeait ou qu 'il était heureux de me

retrouver.

J 'ai jamais entendu le mot ma fille, mon enfant.

He was violent.

I wished my mother a lot of pain because

she never protected

me.

I'm with a man and I can't tell him that I love him.

There is a lack of realization in this life.

Something that is done, something that is laid, and something that also allows

life in this world.

Life in this world.

My father died when I was 9 years old, and before that age of 9, when I was

little, I was very facetious and very lively.

Yes, of course, I missed this father a lot.

I have a very precise image of him.

I remember him playing with me.

I think I feel a lack of something.

I feel a lack, a lot of lack.

How? How am I going to continue?

How am I going to be able to approach the

complicated world that is not necessarily in

simplicity?

We need a lot of weapons.

And I feel like a child.

Besides, when I look at the adults around me,

It's sometimes strange to realize... Here I skip the

ages, I find myself in another age, but I don't feel like I'm their

age.

I feel, precisely, there are parts... childlike.

This child, he has... Yes, he's still there, in a way.

He's still there.

Before, I was looking for reconciliation with my parents.

And now I don't feel the desire to have a justification or a

pardon or an explanation.

I don't have that desire anymore.

My relationship with the couple is much more tense.

It's as if we were confronted.

even closer, even closer to our problem.

Which, in my opinion, is not a negative thing.

I need action.

I need change.

I need something new to move forward.

I need to be recognized as a woman in the couple.

I don't know how to do it for myself, I don't know how to do it for both.

I don't know how to do it for the couple, so it's like...

There is the suffering of not knowing what to bring.

We can continue together or stop the relationship.

And I admit that in the last few days, my mind floated to stop the

I have a problem with my father and mother.

I feel abandoned.

I feel hurt and I feel angry inside.

I feel like I'm not heard. Like I'm... Like

no one is listening.

And I feel I have so much to say, you know, and I feel like I want to really

myself.

And I feel something is blocking me.

And there's an anger in me that is deep.

And I want to heal myself with this.

Father. Mother.

Sister.

I feel good.

I feel a little bit free.

La sangre es sagrada.

La menstruación que ha sido

rechazada por el hombre desde los tiempos bíblicos Donde Moisés dijo, una

con su menstruación no puede entrar al templo. La sangre en la vagina es un

es un pecado, es una abominación.

Entonces, a las mujeres les aconsejo que con su sangre menstrual realicen su

autorretrato. No tienen que ser artistas ni buenas dibujantes. Tienen que

afirmar la creatividad de su menstruación.

Once you have done your portrait with your menstrual blood, varnish it, put a

silver frame and exhibit it in a place where all the people who want it can see

it.

The book that has marked me the most in my life is the dance of reality.

And as life is magical, it allowed me to meet

Alejandro Zdrosny.

I came to see him.

to talk to you about an anxiety related to my femininity.

He proposed to me an act

to add femininity to my life.

I had to lay down my menstrual blood for nine months on the back of my baby.

This act was very strong for me.

The first time I laid down my blood, a diffuse heat spread in my belly.

It was extraordinary, really extraordinary.

It came out of the ordinary.

It was very localized, I had intense heat in my belly, in front of the traces

of blood found here.

And after nine months, from the first concert, I had to talk to the audience

clean the back of my instrument.

This act allowed me to harmonize the masculine and the feminine, to come out

a projection that was too close, too narrow.

And I know that in the whole in which I play, I no longer question myself, I

have no more anxiety about the fact that being the bass is associated with the

masculine and does not allow me to express my feminine.

I am free from this anxiety.

What is the meaning of life?

Life.

The brain asks questions.

The heart gives answers.

Life has no meaning.

You have to live it.

Live.

Live.

Live!

Well, I had a boyfriend, a fiancé, with whom I was going to get married eight

years ago. Well, he had a sudden death. We were at his house.

Pues de repente él se lanzó por la ventana. Yo lo único que agarré, alcancé

tocarle un pie, o sea, como que reaccioné, yo estaba así como de

reaccioné y agarré una parte de la pierna, pero se me escapó de las manos.

Él practicaba paracaidismo, entonces estaba, todo el tiempo se estaba

del avión.

Cada vez que se lanzaba, antes de lanzar, ya estaba arriba en el avión, ya

estaba junto y me hablaba.

Evelyn, te amo. O sea, ya se iba a lanzar. El guía que se aventó por la

hizo exactamente lo mismo. O sea, me dijo lo mismo. Evelyn, te amo. Y se

Y corriendo hacia afuera para buscar donde estaba.

Como no lo encontré, comencé a pedir ayuda.

Y pues ya de repente los vecinos empezaron a sumar. Era un edificio de

departamentos. Llegó la policía, llegaron los bomberos, llegó todo el

Empezaron a buscarlo porque no se veía.

Y estaba en un balcón de uno de los departamentos de los piezas de abajo. Se

cayó en el balcón.

After I don't know how long, they told me, no, he's dead.

Well, I had a lot of despair, not knowing what was happening.

And when I found out he was dead, I was in panic.

It was a very intense pain, a despair of...

de no saber por qué o qué había pasado, por qué lo había provocado, y pues el

sentimiento de culpa que yo tenía en ese entonces de pensar que por mi culpa

había tomado esa decisión.

Lo único que sentí es mucho dolor y estaba confundida.

We were very in love.

We had a lot of life plans together.

At first, we were going to be living here.

I wanted us to move to Mexico.

There were plans of this family together, of having children together.

talked about it, of doing things for the future and everything. Then, all of a

sudden, it all disappeared.

Las últimas horas fueron terribles para mí. Estuve muy mal, muy triste. Tenía

todos los sentimientos encontrados.

Y siempre había evitado regresar hasta ahora que se

dio esta oportunidad.

¿Cuántos años estaba fuera? Ocho.

Él murió en el 2010.

Desde entonces no había regresado.

Ocho años.

It must be from this side. The apartment was one of those with the windows

open. Because just like that, when I left, I was looking

for it here, where it was.

But I couldn't find it. I don't remember the place well. It seemed like it had

everything.

We keep us in the moment.

Liberated. I finally did it.

Let's go.

I felt like

it was the step I had to take. It was literally a leap I had

to take to free myself from this.

And it's not that I forget, because I think I'll always remember this, and

as things happened, but I don't feel like a burden anymore, like a

guilt and something I missed doing when I didn't say goodbye.

I think that now I can find something that really fills my spirit and my soul

continue and to be happy.

No?

What art do you cultivate, Alejandro?

I write poems.

Do you know any of memory?

No. But you're a poet.

Improvise.

The being that inhabits me is consumed, throwing flames from the dream.

Tengo 46 años, desde los 6 años.

Tatamudeo.

Durante la adolescencia fue un problema muy grave.

No podía comunicarme con las personas y

mi reacción fue...

There are people

who have

separated me, who have...

um I can't breathe.

I would like to speak more

fluently always, even when I'm under high pressure.

Put your hand on your heart.

How old are you?

Don't tell me you're 47.

Tell me how old you are inside.

Like 12 years. 12 years you feel, right?

Here we are getting to the truth.

You have 12 years of emotional life.

Your sex, your phallus, is it small, medium or large?

I think it's medium.

Do you have a strong sexual experience?

I think I've never been someone who has a

full sexual life.

You're a child.

I think that the world seemed to

you as an enemy when you were a child.

Colegio fue cuando empecé a tartamudear. Tu tartamudez es el

nido en el que tú estás protegido.

Acuérdate de eso, lo que te estoy diciendo.

Yo te voy a explicar por qué.

Cuando tu padre la engañaba, ella pensaba en su padre, que la quería y la

protegía y no la despreciaba.

Entonces, para tu madre, el sexo es algo que no es bueno.

Y tú tienes la prohibición de ser hombre.

Entonces tú te pones tartamudo porque tú quieres ocupar el puesto de tu abuelo

tartamudo. Porque siendo tartamudo, tu madre inmediatamente te prefiere.

Siempre me tratan como si fuera el mal.

Eres el niño.

Y luego te ven como no inteligente.

Porque los niños no tienen la inteligencia de adultos y entonces se

complejo a ti.

that no one admires you as what you really are. The man you

are is ignored.

Many of the things you say have a... I mean, I can see them.

I can see them. I mean, I...

Siento cuando tú me la dices, yo lo puedo ver.

Sí.

Y hace poco estaba como viendo cómo me ven los otros.

Y siento que siempre ha sido como con esa especie como de lástima, como de...

Sí, como...

to think that I am either fragile or defenseless.

And... I...

always...

You freed the child, you lived him to the fullest.

You gave all the permissions to the child.

Now you have to give all the permissions to your adult.

Open your legs a little.

I am going to transmit to you, in this spiritual,

sacred center, I am going to transmit to you the masculine energy.

Because I am a material archetype.

Isn't it? Because it represents the generations and generations of men from

where you come from.

Yes?

So what I am going to do is I am going to take your hands.

That is the

energy.

Let it come.

Esa es la fuerza que te da los siglos.

Es una energía pura, fuerte, que te llena.

Pon tu fuerza viril en tu cara.

Pon tu fuerza viril en tu boca.

Habla.

Here I am!

Yes, sir.

I accept to be an adult.

I accept to be an adult!

I'm 47 years old.

I'm 47 years old!

I can speak very well.

I can speak very well.

Cita las tablas del 2, 2 más 2, 4.

2 por 1, 2.

2 por 2, 4. 2 por 7.

2 por 1, 2.

2 por 2, 4. 2 por 3, 6.

2 por 4, 8. 2 por 5, 10.

2 por 6, 12.

2 por 7, 14.

2 por 8, 16.

2 por 9, 18.

2 por 10, 20.

Una vida no es suficiente.

Reconocer todas las vidas es necesario.

Me gusta el pan, lo muerdo, y entonces veo el trigo, los

frijoles temprano, la verde forma de la primavera.

Ando, nado, navego hasta encontrarnos. Tú vives, vas y vienes de un

lado a otro, aunque tú no lo sepas.

Eso yo sí lo sé.

Y esta es la palabra.

No sufras.

Las líneas se ocultaron con el color y la trama del tejido.

Yo borro los colores y busco hasta encontrar el tejido profundo.

Y cuando todo esto está aprobado, escribo.

Escribo con tu vida y con la mía. Para que tú sepas quién soy y cuánto gano.

Le voy a dar un abrazo.

47 years old.

I'm a man.

I

missed

many possibilities, many things to do for myself and for others.

Well, that's how it is.

And then I can't resist.

It makes me angry, you see, to get to my age and to say, I missed.

There's always a way to take the super -dose medication. At that time, I sleep

and there's no problem.

That's what I'm afraid of, you see, not having enough resistance to not do

that. Well, I missed.

J 'ai raté mon union avec mon mari, que je n 'aimais pas, mais au

lieu, je l 'ai épousé quand même.

C 'est pas lui qu 'il fallait.

Mais comme il partait en Afrique, je l 'ai épousé

pour pouvoir partir.

Parce que je me suis dit, si je reste là, ma vie est toute tracée.

We're going to meet a good boy, I'm going to get married, I'm going to have

children, and that's it, that's all.

So I was disappointed.

So my life was, in the evening, to give a reception, well, a reception, to see

friends.

In the afternoon, to go to the square and play volleyball.

and swim in the Voury, which is a large river that crosses the Cameroun.

And then... And then that's it.

So it's not much, because I dreamed of having an

interesting life.

So from the outside, it seems interesting, because when I came back to

I saw that my friends Elles n 'avaient pas bougé.

Elles avaient un enfant en plus, mais elles n 'avaient pas bougé.

Moi, au moins, j 'ai souffert.

J 'ai bougé un peu.

Mais je ne sais même pas si c 'est ça qu 'il y a à dire.

Alors, il faut que je me contente d 'avoir un bel appartement, de

faire des choses, de lire de bons bouquins, etc.

It's not fair.

It's not fair.

I don't give a fuck about the world.

I don't give a fuck about the migrants.

I don't give a fuck about all those people.

I don't give a fuck at all.

They're dying.

They just had to stay at home.

You see all those horrible words coming out of my head?

I'm tired.

Alexandro, I'm tired, tired, tired of living and tired like that, while

if you look at my life, everything is great, everything is great,

my children love me a lot, they are very nice.

But that's not it, that's not it.

I should be able to do something really bad, you see.

That's what I need.

To kill someone or do something like that.

Because then, then I'll see that I exist.

You can see that I'm acting.

I want to cry a little like that.

But I'm still acting.

I'm not that unhappy.

I'm not that unhappy.

Put your ear in my heart.

Come, come, come, come, come.

That's it.

Breathe calmly.

Don't get tired.

No. You deserve to be accompanied.

You deserve to be pulled out of this depression.

Barbara.

You say you had a little girl of four or five years in you, don't you?

Yes. Let her come.

Let your little girl come.

You have a little girl.

No, I didn't grow up. I became a little girl.

Yes, enough.

It's ridiculous.

No, it's not ridiculous. It's human.

Nothing that is human is ridiculous.

Come here.

Come.

Nothing here with me.

It's rather Alexandro that I don't want.

I don't want to make any effort.

It's not an effort. What you're doing here is not an effort.

No. No.

No one is asking you for an effort.

Listen. I'm asking myself to make an effort.

But you know you're not alone.

If you suffer, I suffer.

Yes. If you're sick, I'm sick.

If you're depressed, I'm depressed.

Because every human being is part of the other.

Do you understand?

Yes, I understand what you're saying.

You belong to humanity.

That means I don't care about the others. Yes.

I don't care about the others. Yes.

You should know what the others are, because the others are the will of the

galaxy, not the human race. What is the human race? It is a will, a

will of the universe that Consciousness exists.

And you are a preterist of Consciousness.

You are creating Consciousness in all the people who have treated you.

I'm not sure.

You will have to recover your own security.

So I'm going to give you an eye on the psychomagic because the psychomagic is

not addressed to your consciousness, but to your unconscious.

Yes, Alexandre. Right?

Of the ruby.

Of the ruby.

You're not going to have it. It's not for you. It's for the data.

Go and fill it up.

I'll wait for you here.

Alessandro, I don't remember why we do this.

But he is there and is waiting for you. But you have to go and make the

appointment at the garden of plants.

There is a river here, it's not much.

We will go slowly and we will bring it as an offering.

Okay. And then every day you will repeat your offering for 21 days.

And every day you will get better.

Yes,

I don't understand.

Yes. We're going to do a psychomagic act. Yes. Let's go.

Alexandre... I doubt... I doubt that his wife is alive.

I'm scared.

I'm scared.

I'm scared.

I resisted for centuries.

You can resist.

Look at your friend.

I gave it to you.

This tree has been here for centuries.

But you, you gave it to me because you nourished it. Even a little, even

nothing, even a small bottle of water, you nourished it.

So now, this is a gift from you to everyone who wants it.

Every day you have given a bottle to me. You are my protector.

And this is a gift from you.

Thank you.

Padre mio, no dándome nada, me lo diste todo.

No amándome, me enseñaste la absoluta necesidad del amor.

J 'ai vraiment ressenti que je m 'étais très fortement identifié à ma mère et

à la tristesse de ma mère, la déception qu

'elle a pu ressentir dans son histoire d 'amour avec mon père.

Elle a beaucoup aimé mon père parce que mon père était l 'image de quelque chose

de vraiment, d 'une grande fantaisie.

of life, of really laughing, of making life really poetic,

of really making life alive.

So she adored him, but at the same time, he was very, very immature.

And it was stronger than him. He really couldn't help himself from being cheated

on a lot.

He wanted to, but he couldn't do otherwise.

He loved my mother deeply, but he couldn't stop himself from going to see

everywhere.

And so...

So

I said to myself, I don't want to be like my father. I want to be faithful to

mother.

But by being too loyal to my mother, I cut myself off from a part of

myself. I am self -limited.

And when I went to see my father, I proposed a song.

And at the beginning, it went very, very badly.

At the beginning, we were... We said, what is this music?

And I was so hurt by this remark.

I cried on it like a sick person for a very long time. And my father had the

magnificent courage to take all the anger from his son,

to accept it, to absorb it.

And then I made another song to sing with him.

And this song really changed everything between us.

I tell him in a song that he can go wherever he wants, that I don't wait for

and that we will meet again anyway.

And in fact, I need to... For me, the luminous side of my father is

flamboyant, it's Gérard Philippe, it's the panache.

So I would like to put on this costume.

which for me symbolizes something of the ear, something of the mouth.

Look how I am Look how

I live See my children

laugh and run

J 'ai tant voyagé, aimé me perdre

J 'ai tant de pays, tant de

femmes aussi

Va

où tu veux, je ne t 'attends pas

Thank you.

Toujours là, le voyage est court

Va le plus loin,

le plus loin possible

C 'est le destin du

voyageur

La nuit est si froide

Viens près de moi

Viens t 'apaiser Je cherche la lumière

J 'aime sa chaleur

C 'est le destin du voyageur

I'm not waiting for you.

People who love each other don't often know each other.

It takes time to be alone.

Les idiots J 'aime les chapeaux J 'aime les

boxeurs J 'aime la chaleur J 'aime

J 'aime J 'aime

les voitures J 'aime les artères J 'aime

les grandes femmes

J 'aime les aéroports J 'aime J

'aime J 'aime J 'aime J

'aime J 'aime J 'aime J 'aime

J 'aime le verglas, j 'aime le vernis, j

'aime les autoroutins.

C 'est vraiment un vieux, vieux, vieux, vieux truc qui était sorti.

Et je me sens léger.

Je me sens tout léger.

Tout neuf.

Let's see if together we can heal someone.

Let's rehearse, without promising anything.

Let's rehearse to heal this person.

Pero este cáncer parte de cuando mi hija tenía 10 meses, y hoy

ella tiene 20 años.

Así un cáncer a la tiroides, luego sarcoma en el tórax,

y usted da cuenta que nunca acaba.

Vamos a ensayar de curar a esta persona.

Yo te voy a tomar, vamos a abrir los brazos, y ustedes van a poner como

curanderos, All her energy goes to her throat to take care of her.

She will feel that they take care of her.

Well, the experience of the Caupolicán was very

important. It opened a door in

my healing.

I came from a very long treatment of very aggressive cancer.

Being on the stage with Don Alejandro,

that all the people with their hands towards me gave me energy,

it was very powerful, it was very strong, it was very healing.

With the passage of time, I felt after the theater,

I felt with a lot of energy.

I felt happy.

I was laughing out of nowhere, something that I had lost even the desire

to laugh with so much aggressive treatment.

It opened an immense door to a healing that

goes beyond what doctors say. I understood that healing exists.

And I understood... That the healing comes from within.

People, mafia, contra la violencia

We'll be right

back.

Oh, Santa Claus.

They are not black sheep.

We have to have mercy for those souls that disappeared.

So we have to sing this song with great sorrow, as if we were the mother of this

person.

Alegria. Alegria.