Original subtitles

And now, here they are,

the most daredevil group of dacky drivers

who ever whirl their wheels in the wacky races.

Competing for the title of the world's wackiest racer.

The cars are approaching the starting line.

First is the Turbo Terrific, driven by Peter Perfect.

Next is Rufus Ruffcut and Sawtooth in the buzz wagon.

Maneuvering for position is the Army Surplus Special.

Right behind is the Anthill Mob in their Bulletproof bomb.

And there's ingenious inventor, Pat Pendig in his converter car.

Oh, and here's the lovely Penelope Pitstop,

the glamour gal of the gas pedal.

Next, we have the bouldermobile with the Slag Brothers, Rock and Gravel.

Lurching along is the Creepy Coupe with the Gruesome Twosome.

And right on their tail is the Red Max.

And there's the Arkansas Chuggabug with Luke and Blubber Bear.

Sneaking along last is that mean machine with those

double-dealing do-batters, Dick Dasterly and his sidekick, Muttley.

And even now, they're up to some dirty trick,

and they're off to a standing start.

And why not? They've been chained to a post by shifty Dick Dasterly.

Who shifts into the wrong gear.

And away they go!

On the Way Out Wacky Races!

Today's wacky race is a long, tough,

grueling grind over rough, tough, ruling country.

From Lulu, Louisiana to the finish line at "deepinaharta" of Texas.

And what a wild and wacky race it is.

The Army Surplus Special has taken the lead.

Lay down rubber, Meekly! We're going like a house of fire!

Did you say fire, Sarge?

Okay!

And the Surplus Special takes a turn for the worse as it goes into reverse.

And despicable Dick Dastardly in Car Double Zero takes the lead.

Who knows? We may win this race the halfway without cheating.

Right, Muttley?

Third place is rugged Rufus Drupcutt and his pal Sawtooth.

Well now, the Buzz Wagon's lost a wheel.

But the Anthill Mob loses two wheels.

Oh, what'll we do, Big Clyde?

Shift into jet skate power.

And the anthill mob skates into second place,

behind Dick Dastardly and car double zero.

Drat, I'll stop him.

Come on.

I'll open the gate on that corral and stampede the cattle across the road.

Get along, little doggies. Go, go, go!

Hold it, hold it! Not me! Across the road, the road!

Call me when the round-up is over, Muttley.

Come on, now. We've got to stop that Antil Mob.

Hello, Sheriff.

Sheriff, get your jail ready. The Anthill Mob's on Highway 42.

Yeah, I know.

They just went by.

- Hold on, there! - It's the sheriff, Clyde.

Now what do we do?

We'll lose 'em. In that wood scout's camp up ahead.

Ha! I don't lose that easy.

All right, you lugs. Now make with the wood scout bit.

Here comes the sheriff.

Come out, Anthill Mob, in the name of the law.

We're a wood scout company.

As you can plainly see

If you think we're something else.

You're wrong as wrong can be.

Oh! Uh, say, have you young unseen anything of a gang of city outlaws?

Yeah, yeah, sheriff. They went that a way.

Well, thanks, boys. I'll round 'em up.

Double drat! They fooled the sheriff with that phony wood scout routine.

But you and I can play wood scouts too.

Eh, Muttley?

Meanwhile, back at the Wacky Races,

Peter Perfect hits an oil slick, and his Turbo Terrific

slips past the Arkansas Chuggabug.

Don't you fret, Blubber. I'll throw this old boiler into tiger power.

Fasten your seatbelts.

Hold your hat, Blubber.

We've got a tiger by the tail.

And back in the lead springs the Chuggabug.

Followed by Big Gruesome,

who's determined to pass it by going into scare the Bear power.

And Scare the Bear it does. But it works in reverse.

And the Creepy Coop drops back to last place.

And the wacky race goes on.

Meanwhile, back at the Wood Scouts.

All right, you guys, now let's get out of these uniforms and hit the road.

Ohh Wait, boss, there's a Wood Scout leader.

Well, well, I see my little troop is ready for their lesson.

We're a wood scout company, as you can plainly see.

Never mind that.

Our lesson for today is starting a fire

by rubbing these two... these...

two sticks together.

Those two sticks?

Right. Quick, Muttley. Quick, behind this tree.

Rub 'em real good, boys.

- I'm. But nothing happening. - Don't worry, it will.

While the anthill mop plays with fire,

Red Max hedgehops over the Slag Brothers.

Whoops, he popped his prop.

Oh dear, my poor car.

Won't somebody help little old helpless me?

Ohh, how darling. They fixed my little old car.

And an old me thanks you ever so ever.

And while the wacky beat goes on,

let's stand by for the second-half of this wacky race.

- Anything, Clyde? - No, not even a spark.

Oh, for Pete's sake. You're not doing it right.

Give me those sticks, dummies.

Why must I do everything myself?

Help! Muttley! Help, Water!

Help! Muttley!

Thanks a lots Muttly.

All right, let's go Ring-ding's waiting in the car.

Hey look, that wood scout's heading for those falls.

- Come on you guys. - All right, boss.

Now here's the caper, we'll lower a human chain to that kid.

- You got it? - We got it, boss.

Okay, now grab my hands as you come by kid.

Atta boy!

- Gee, thanks sir. - It's okay, little fella.

Hold it right there!

Sorry, Sheriff, but we have to catch a boat.

Uh, yeah. And the wacky race, too.

- Ring-Ding. Start the car. - Gotcha, Clyde.

Hey, wait for us!

Back at the track, a giant tumbleweed rolls toward the wacky racers.

Professor Pat Pending rises to the occasion.

But Penelope Pitstop is headed for a rumble with a tumbleweed.

Rufus Ruffcut goes to the rescue and shifts into pulverized overdrive.

And turbolizes the tumbleweed to shreds.

Oh, thank you ever so ever macho.

'Twas my pleasure, Miss Penelope.

And now Rufus has the pleasure of being in first place.

Now remember, Muttley,

when I jump onto the end of this teeter board,

It will bounce you up into the air so you can blow the dart gun

at the balloon holding that can of blasting powder.

It will fall down on the road and explode,

making it impassable.

Rufus Ruffcutt is still out in front, but Professor Pat Pending

shifts a new triple-dribble power and bounces into the lead.

Ready, Muttley?

Here they come, and here we go!

Muttley!

Help!

Ouch! Muttley!

And remember, you're not plucking a chicken.

Ouch! Ow!

Professor Pat Pending decides to ensure his lead with his latest invention...

Pogo Power!

But a prairie dog hole stops his

pogo-a-gogo and leaves him at the post.

A pogo post, that is. While Lucky Number 7,

driven by the anthill mob, takes over the lead.

Every jalopy jockey is jockeying

for position as they come into the homestretch.

Well, Muttley, this is our chance to sneak past the pack.

OK, ready with our secret weapon?

Fire!

The Wacky Racers are finishing fast, it's going to be close.

They're approaching the finish line, they're neck and neck.

And the winner is... Uh, just a moment, folks.

Our instant play it again photo

device shows that Rufus Ruffcutt wins by a nose.

The Bouldermobile is second and

the Converter car third.

While Dick Dastarly is stranded above the roads.

Drat secret weapon.

Subtitles: Kilo

And they're off again. The wacky race goes on and on.

Each driver determined to win,

maneuvering for position.

Looking for the opening that will put him in the lead.

The anthill mob uses getaway power.

Red Max of the Crimson Haybailer makes his move.

The Arkansas Chug-a-Bug uses jet power.

And the creepy Coop pours it on with dragon power.

Ohh It's going to be a great race, folks.

Hey, wait a minute. Stop!

- This race starts next week. - Next week?

That means I'll get a good start on the other.

Rat, rat, and double rat.