Original subtitles

Wow. Wearing a suit into the woods today, Doc?

What are you talking about? Throw away your future somewhere else. Oh, my God.

Does he ever wear anything else?

I think he literally only has a suit. That's so sad.

I bet he even wears it when he's having sex.

Girl, no.

Oh, my God. Guys, away from me. Away from me. My toes are out. I just got

done.

Who is it?

Your roommate, obviously.

You're taking forever.

Doing your hair differently today.

Oh, yeah.

Fuck yeah.

Oh, why is she bothering me on Blaze Day?

Let's get this party off the ground, yeah.

Come on.

Just hold still, Amelia.

I'm Amelia.

I'm Harley.

Oh, like, learn our names, Doc. It's not that hard. And yet, Dr. Beth is out of

your depth.

All right, you have a slight fever.

Any abdominal cramps in addition to the diarrhea? Ew, he's still wearing the

vomit shirt. Oh, my gosh, those shoes deserve to be vomited on. I can't look.

Their ugliness burns my eyes. No, go on. I love getting fashion tips from high

schoolers and flip -flops.

Okay. Now, you all have symptoms of food poisoning. I need to hear about your

diet. I need to know everything you've eaten in the last 24 hours. I'm rude.

You can't ask about our diet. That is fat shaming. I'm going to need you to

your three brain cells together and tell me if you've shared any food recently.

We all had dinner at the Salty Breeze last night. It was Liam's birthday.

Happy birthday, Liam.

It's not today.

Did you all have the same thing? I had a cheese salad.

Okay.

Salmonella, maybe.

I'm going to need a stool sample from each of you.

You don't have to poop in it. There's a spoon.

Just stop.

Okay. Other than that, I need you to rest, hydrate, and eat bland foods.

What did you just call my mom?

Brat. You know Brat?

Bananas, rice, applesauce, toast. Brat. Hey, Doc.

Larry, Jack.

You got time for a walk?

Well, I...

Watch out, I'm going to blow.

I've examined four patients this morning with clear

symptoms of food poisoning. Okay, and good morning to you too, Doc. And they

ate here last night. And I need to see the kitchen. Lower your voice.

What's going on?

Should I stop eating my oatmeal?

No, no, keep eating.

It's your funeral.

What?

Now wait just a minute, Doc.

How long has this butter been sitting out?

Morning, Doc. Only a few minutes. Why do you ask? A couple of people are sick.

He thinks it came from us. Now, Doc, we keep this place in ship shape.

You butter believe it.

And we're always up to code.

Well, we'll see what the inspector has to say.

What? I'm sorry, what?

Because there were more than three cases of vomiting, I had to file a possible

foodborne illness report with the Maine Department of Health and Human Services.

What?

Are you serious?

I'm just following the rules.

Today? Mm -hmm. You had to do this today.

I'm all day.

It's blade day.

Doc!

It's always next year, honey.

I'm looking for a doc!

Doc B!

Doctor! Hey!

There he is. I've been looking everywhere for you. Get in. You do not

late. For what?

The annual Wilderness Survival Workshop.

I handle the emergency radio protocol.

Let me guess, Dr. Reese did first aid. Yep.

I'm kind of busy right now.

Oh, okay. Well, don't worry about it. I can handle it. I was a lifeguard one

summer. That was until the, well, accident is a strong word that I don't

use. But it was one of those things that I feel like I saw her, right? And she

was swimming very well.

This better be quick. Yeah, all right.

All right.

Doc.

Doc B.

Okay.

She thanked me right after.

So, what's your show this week?

Oh, I'm on hiatus. I'm dealing with some stuff.

Is that your mom?

Yes. It is so annoying. She keeps texting me. I'm like, we are not

But I can't text her that because then we would be speaking. So you're really

not going to her wedding tomorrow? No.

I'm not going.

No way.

Who?

Come on now, Doc.

So what is Blaze Day?

Well, actually, it's not a day. It's a person, Blaze. He's like this mysterious

wilderness man who comes out of the woods once a year to help us brush up on

survival skills.

He lives in the woods?

As far as we know, he's really cool.

The women seem to be particularly interested, and I guess they worry a lot

getting lost.

Come on. What is going on?

Shh. It's happening.

Oh, I heard the twigs now. Do you see him? Does anybody see him?

Shh. I think he's coming.

He's even dreamier than I remember. I think I'm going to faint.

Man, what's he squat?

Action, man.

Show us what you're made of. There he is.

Oh, my God.

Ladies.

It's time to survive.

Oh, boy.

As I say every year, out here in Maine, it's always good to brush up on

wilderness safety. Even on the shortest hike, an emergency can happen.

But don't worry.

That's why I'm here.

Here we go.

Point the direction of travel arrow toward the object.

Then rotate the base plate to line up the arrows.

I'm such a ninny when it comes to these things. I couldn't find my way out of a

paper bag.

In this case, we're heading 17 degrees north.

Hey, Blade?

Yes? Which way is north?

It's this way.

Oh, I see.

I left my office for this?

Just enjoy the show.

Listen up!

Now on to CPR.

Finally.

The first thing to know. Okay.

I got this.

So glad I'm here, then.

Okay, I need two volunteers from mouth to mouth.

Mark, Louisa, you're a couple, so why don't you come on up? Nope, she dumped

Come hard out of my chest. I'm good now, though. You're in the woods all the

time. Totally over it. Didn't get the message out to you yet.

I'm so sorry. Thank you.

So you're single.

I mean... Interesting.

It's always good to know how to hunt for your food.

Now, can I have a volunteer?

Anybody, anybody, anybody?

Okay, fine. Louisa, step right up.

You won. Step right up.

Oh, okay.

Cool, cool, cool, cool.

Okay.

All right.

I want you to grip.

Right here.

The shaft?

Right here?

Feel the tension.

I do. I feel it. I feel it.

Okay.

I did it. Wow.

Good job, buddy.

Good job. Good job.

I'm just saying, you know, ask around.

Man, a nice romantic dinner at the Salty Breeze. Well, maybe not the Salty

Breeze. I hear people are getting sad. But somewhere else. No, she's kind of

focused on her career.

Oh, life is too short to live in the friend zone, kiddo. Oh, the friend.

How do you know what that is?

Oh.

Look at him, poor guy.

You want to spare a few minutes? Come on.

And now doctor will do first aid.

Finally, and it's Dr. Best.

Okay, first I'll show you how to use a tourniquet.

Ladies, everyone over here.

Okay, so now if everyone would just take a look right here.

Right here.

See me twisting.

This way, ladies.

You twist to provide pressure.

You just look, ladies, this way. You just provide enough pressure to block

arterial flow. It's really that simple.

Excuse me.

Ladies.

How far up the leg does it go?

I just explained it right here, Sally. I just told you. If you look, that...

This eye.

Oh.

Now I understand.

Now you understand? What was... It's right here.

Thank you, Doc.

Ladies! One of the greatest dangers of being lost in the woods.

It's hypothermia.

Now, if you don't have a fire, this is how you keep warm.

First, you strip off your clothes.

Okay.

I need you to pretend with me that we're completely undressed.

Okay.

Good. Now, huddle position.

Very important to generate body heat.

Okay. Arms under my arms, head on my chest.

On my chest.

Seriously? Mm -hmm. Melt into me.

No, but I'm good on this. I'm going to be in my car in case there's crime and

stuff. Yeah, I think we've got enough of that.

Yeah.

Good. Yeah.

Good.

Separate. Okay. I think we've got it.

Yeah, I feel warmer.

Yeah. Thanks. That was... Now.

One last exercise.

Oh, thank God.

This is the dead man's carry.

Now, I'm going to need a volunteer, someone that I can carry on my... Oh,

my God!

Ah, my back!

Ladies, come on.

You must get a hold of yourself.

What was that?

Just a tree branch. Nothing.

On the window.

Nothing.

I'm good, Doc.

Really. Western medicine's not my thing.

Just rub a little willow bark on it.

The woods will heal me.

The woods cannot diagnose a fracture.

Let's make sure those hens didn't crack a rib.

Elaine?

Why can't I see the images?

Ooh, Wi -Fi's down.

Can you fix it?

Can you fix it?

Elaine, once again, as my assistant, it is by definition your job. You should

call Al.

He's really good with that stuff.

You should call.

Oh, she's a terrible assistant.

Thank you.

I still don't like you.

Most men don't.

Oh, hey, Doc. I just fixed the door.

The door didn't need fixing. It opens, it closes. What more do you need?

No. No!

I don't want this. And for the last time, this is not my dog.

Then why is he sitting at your feet?

I have to go back to my patient. Since you're here, fix the Wi -Fi.

Wi -Fi.

Dr. Martin Best, Christopher Clybourne, environmental health practitioner.

I just need you to sign here and here as the doctor who reported the possible

foodborne illness.

See? All up to code, Martin. The most hygienic kitchen he's ever inspected, in

fact. It's true.

Really? That's good news.

Surprising with the pig running around the kitchen.

What?

No.

Brother, who are you going to believe? No, it's not a...

Oh, my God.

Oh, no.

Martin.

What have you done?

Why? This wife wants to kill me.

I don't even know. Elaine.

Mommy, I am at work.

I already told you I'm not coming to the wedding. Honey, I'm not here to see

you. I'm here to see that boss of yours.

Really? Why?

Are you sick?

I mean, I don't care.

But are you sick?

No. You look too mad to be sick. He shut down the Salty Breeze.

Which means he shut down my wedding.

Really?

I mean... Really? I know that you don't want me to get married. Well, at least

not to dumb -dumb. But honey, we're gonna get married.

Whether it's Saturday or next month. Whether it's at the Salty Breeze or Town

Hall. Okay, and what about Dad?

I will love your father to the day that I die, but I love Dum Dum too.

Oh my God, now you got me saying it. Yeah, because it's so very true.

Elaine, I love you so much, but I need to speak with Dr. Beth. You can't. He's

with a patient right now.

Then tell him I am furious with him for shutting down the Salty Breeze.

And I'm sure that I won't be the only one.

What seems to be the problem?

Nothing.

I just thought I'd come here and give you a piece of my mind. Oh, how

You accept returns?

I take my daughter to the Salty Breeze every weekend for Sunday Sundays.

What am I supposed to do now?

I don't know. Maybe make them yourself?

You must make them myself.

Martin, we have to take Brisket away. You did this to us. It's not personal,

okay? It's protocol.

It's personal to us.

It's our life. We defended you, no matter what people say. I don't care

people say. Well, we do.

When what's -his -name called you a snob, we said you... What did we say?

Cultured. We said you were cultured. When everybody called you horribly rude,

and you are, you know. You're horribly rude. We say you're uniquely honest.

We have always had your back, and this is how you repay us? It's called

Martin. But I guess that word doesn't mean anything to you. I'm just

You have a farm animal.

Wandering around a food preparation area. How am I in the wrong here?

I'm a doctor. I have a responsibility to this town. I'm just trying to make sure

that the food you're serving is safe to eat. Yeah, well, we've contested the

health department's report, and we're going to fight this. It's okay, sweetie.

It's just until we figure things out. At least you'll be with your friend,

Paisley.

We thought you were one of us. And I never even got to see Blaze.

It's okay, farm animal.

You're never here.

What's wrong with you?

Is it true?

You got the salty breeze shut down? I didn't. How could you do this to them?

just so you know, I had a stomach bug last night. Really?

How are you feeling now?

I'm fine, but I was throwing up last night. You need to rehydrate, restore

electrolytes. How much water have you had today?

I'll get you some. A lot. I'm good. Thank you.

What were your other symptoms?

Fever, dizziness, cramps, chills.

Diarrhea?

Um...

Things were going out the attic more than the basement?

Understood. And what did you eat at the Salty Breeze?

Nothing. I ate at Jeannie's.

Jeannie's? That's what I'm trying to say to you.

You need to fix this. That place is their whole lives. You have to make this

right. Louisa.

Yes?

I'm going to need a stool sample.

Whenever you're ready.

No rush.

This town has too many pigs.

Oh, hi, Doc.

Heard you shut down the salty breeze.

I didn't. The health inspector did.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Keep your distance.

I got a little stomach bug. Really?

When did it start?

Around 11.

I was blowing up the toilet all night.

I'm really pissed that I missed Blaze.

That's the highlight of my year.

I'm assuming this is the aforementioned Paisley?

None of your big words, Doc.

And you're teaching the youth of America?

Well, right now, I'm piggy sitting because of you. And Brisket's welcome

she wants. We have play dates all the time anyways.

All the time?

Yeah, she was here a few days ago.

Are they always this snotty?

No, but maybe they have a little bug, too, now that I think about it.

Do you mind if I... Yeah, whatever floats your boat, Doc.

Okay.

Wow. You're good at that.

Any cough?

No. Okay, not swine flu.

No rashes, not hoof and mouth.

Probably not brucellosis.

Although, have you had any joint pain?

No.

Everyone who has symptoms has come in contact with a pig.

Except Craig and George aren't sick.

Okay, if you're going to keep talking to yourself, can I go back to my toilet?

Oh, yes, of course.

While you're at it, if you don't mind.

How did you learn how to do all of this?

I don't know. Just taught myself, I guess. Always been good with computers

stuff. Oh.

You're, like, really smart.

Do we have Blaze's x -ray yet?

Almost, Doc.

Send these off for immediate... Doctor!

Thank you so, so, so much.

For what?

Closing the salty breeze.

To be clear, I didn't close the salty... Because now the stupid wedding is

postponed and Dum -Dum won't be my stepdad.

Let me guess. Dum -Dum is not his given name.

Thank you, Doc.

Seriously.

That wedding would be the worst thing to ever happen to me.

All right.

Wi -Fi fixed.

Finally, someone competent.

You know, Doc, I was thinking maybe I could be your IT guy around here. I

come in between jobs with my dad.

To pay you so you could hang around and annoy me? I'll pass. Wait, no. There's

always something going wrong with the computers. And he could digitize the old

files.

Fine.

No giggling.

We don't giggle.

Martin James Best!

How could you?

How could I what?

George and Craig have had brisket for 18 years and they've never had a problem

before. They keep that place as clean as a whistle. Did you not even think about

that before you reported them? Did you even consider that you might ruin their

lives? They have a pig in a restaurant. That's not my fault. It's unsanitary.

The salty breeze is the heart of this town.

How do you not understand about the concept of community?

How can you be so heartless?

Heartless? I'm a doctor. If people are getting sick... Don't give me that.

I have stood by you while you canceled baked bean suppers and broken innocent

arms and treated the people here no better than the gum on the bottom of

shoe. But now I've reached my limit.

Now you have gone too far.

You have hurt people that I love and may have cost them their entire future.

And you don't even care.

That's not true. I care about keeping people safe.

I don't care about silly little festivals or games and gossip like

in this town.

I can't.

You may be unhappy, but that does not give you the right to go around tearing

down everybody else's happiness.

You know, maybe you don't belong here.

What's wrong with you?

Get me Blaze, now!

Elaine! Get me Blaze, now!

What?

Why? What's wrong with him?

No fracture.

You see this widened mediastinum?

Yes, doctor, I see this.

I don't... He has an enlargement of the aortic area.

Look, given his other symptoms...

He might have a possible aortic dissection.

What's a... It's a tear in the inner layer of the main artery. If the blood

through the aortic wall, it could rupture and he would die immediately.

I need Blaze's phone number right now. We don't have a number for him. Then

me his address. He doesn't have an address.

Do you know where he lives? No. Does anyone know where he lives? No.

Does anyone know anyone who might know where he lives? No. He lives off the

grid, in the woods.

How do you get in touch with him?

We don't. Once a year, he comes to us.

All right.

Well, if he wants to live off the grid, then he's going to die off the grid.

Doc, you can't mean that. What?

He walked out of my office, Elaine. Okay, clearly he doesn't want to be

How can you be so callous? What else am I supposed to do? You're a doctor, and

he needs help.

Sarah was right. What is wrong with you?

You've heard all that?

Not exactly soundproof walls in here, Doc.

Fine.

Do you have a better idea?

make no mistake we will help you but we are not happy with you right now right

all right so blaze needs immediate medical attention keep him lying down

heart rate cannot raise above 60 ppm if you can find him that is all

right girls let's do this

Don't forget to adjust for magnetic variation to 18 degrees west in Maine.

head northeast at 43 degrees.

Radio to Channel 5. Copy. Move out.

Got this. Let's go, ladies.

Data grid search.

We're coming, Blaze.

They... They could always do this?

Yep.

But then why were they... You know nothing about women, Doc.

You go with footstep. We should go this way. Oh, okay.

She's right.

I'd know that sandalwood mask anywhere.

Let's go. His men bracelet.

Okay, that's it. There's no time to waste. We've got to go. Split up into

of two. Move now.

I'm not going with you, Doc. Me neither.

Place by yourself, Doc.

Place! Place!

I'll go with you.

Place! Place!

Okay.

People are pretty upset with you, aren't they, again?

Seems to be a specialty of mine.

What I did was right.

No matter what the angry mom thinks.

Sometimes doing the right thing doesn't always mean following the rules.

People are more complicated than that.

Do you ever get tired of it?

What?

Being nice.

All the time.

Sometimes I just want to...

Scream at people.

Like Principal Holloway.

But he has been sick, so I guess I should go easy on him. Wait, what?

Yeah, he had that stomach bug too a couple days ago.

Teens, Jeannie, Holloway, you.

Does a man named Larry Jackson work at the school?

Larry, the janitor, yeah.

It's coming from the... What? Yeah.

Whoa, whoa.

Louisa. Yeah?

Are you okay?

Yeah. Are you hurt?

I'm

great.

Are you sure? I'm sure.

I'm great.

Oh, I'm sorry. It's your... What?

I'm sorry. It's your face.

My face? No. My face. No. I don't... My face. No.

No, don't worry. We found Blaze.

He's unconscious.

We got Blaze.

We got Blaze.

We got Blaze.

We got... Damn it.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. You got this,

okay? One.

Two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

One,

two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

One, two, three, four, five, six. Everybody clear. Okay.

He's breathing.

We need a stretcher.

Wow. Okay.

Everybody get together. Are we ready? One, two, three, lift.

I

am.

You're on your way to Bar Harbor Hospital.

They're going to be okay.

When I'm through this, I know a great spot we could climb to.

Would you watch the sunrise with me?

With your heart, the only thing you're going to be climbing is your couch.

I don't have a couch.

Bye, Blaze.

Bye, Blaze.

Congrats,

ladies. We did it.

We did.

We did.

Wish we could get a drink at the Salty Breeze.

Sure feels good to save something, doesn't it?

Sure does.

I need your help.

I'm going to check the other fridge.

Okay.

Well, that confirms it.

Thank you.

Can we make this short?

I was right in the middle of some afternoon delight with my bride -to -be.

didn't know.

Until I was rudely interrupted by the same man that ruined our wedding.

Wait.

You're a dum -dum?

Excuse me?

These expired hamburger patties are the source of the food poisoning.

Every person that got sick is confirmed they've eaten the school hamburgers in

the past few days. And boy, were they rubbery.

I mean, I could only get in a few bites. I had to put ketchup all over them.

Just a sorry. Continue.

Given the date on the wrapping, I suspect you were fully aware you were

expired meat to your students and staff.

Oh, it's barely expired. It was barely expired. Just a few days.

I thought it would be okay. You thought it would be okay to serve expired meat?

I've had to stretch out the food supply because of funding cuts.

I am under a lot of pressure, okay?

My fridge is full of expired food. Milk, yogurt, salmon, cheese.

Don't do that.

It tastes mostly fine. I'm sure they don't. No, don't. That's not good. I'm

sorry. You know, you really are a dum -dum.

He's not the only one

What

are

you doing?

I'm getting corn For the wedding. How can you get corn at a time like this? We

have a wedding to put on, and I need Girl Scouts with miso corn salad for 50.

Can't we just be happy that they let us reopen?

Of course they let us reopen.

We didn't get anyone sick.

The school did.

What are we going to do about Brisket?

Gigi, baby. She can't stay at Jeannie's forever.

What if she chokes on a twig or gets in a fight with Paisley?

Brisket can take Paisley. I had a nightmare.

Jeannie threw a luau and Brisket was the... Oh, no, no, oh, no, I know, I

It's not the same without her.

So maybe we can just... What?

Bring her back and keep her upstairs. No, no. If the health inspector returns,

we could get shut down forever.

So we have to choose between the Salty Breeze and Brisket.

Look, we'll think of something.

Maybe we'll build a shed outside.

A shed?

Like she's some farm animal.

You're right.

It's beneath her.

It's Martin.

Hey.

You did? What?

She can?

What? How?

What?

Hey

there.

What in the name of...

I'm guessing this is about the... I just can't believe it's actually happening.

I'm going to have a stepdad.

Yes, you are. You better get going.

Floor's filthy, especially with that dog running around. I wish that you had met

my dad.

He was so goofy.

And adventurous.

And now, it's like he doesn't exist.

How could you choose him also?

Like, how could you choose dum -dum?

Love is blind, I guess.

Ugh.

I can't

go to the wedding.

I can't... pretend.

To be happy.

When I'm so sad.

Because if I go.

Then it's like.

Like I've replaced him too.

I know it feels that way, but... Not true.

How would you know?

I lost my sister when I was six.

Oh.

She was so... Annoying.

Yeah.

Constantly teasing me.

Now a big sister.

But... And she was my best friend.

And you miss her.

Every day.

So how do you... You just have to keep going.

I promise you, nobody can ever replace your father.

I'm gonna do one of these.

That'll be good.

Oh,

good God.

Did you... No.

Absolutely not. Just for the... No. Just help me get there.

No. You don't have to stay.

Please be seated.

Wow, it seems like somebody

pulled some strings.

Well, I might have made a few calls.

Well, aren't you just full of surprises?

Well, they did receive a perfect health inspection score.

As long as Brisket stays out of the kitchen, there shouldn't be a problem.

All I'm saying is sometimes, perhaps, maybe, rules are made to be bent. And

everybody can go back to the salty breeze.

Marty, you did good.

Thank you for making the call.

Oh, sorry, Doc.

That's it.

That's it. I'm buying new shoes.

Come on, honey.

I feel better.

Oh, good.

I'll hold your hair.

This killer's underestimating you.

Good.

They won't even see you coming.

What now? We get him.