Original subtitles

[theme music playing]

(SINGING) Here we go again, on the road till we stop

and then we'll shop.

So one, two, three now baby here we go.

Here we go, here we go on a mission undercover

and we're in control.

Here we go, here we go we're totally spies

and get on with the show.

Here we go, here we go, here we go.

[screaming]

I'm going to get this role.

I'm going to get this role.

I'm going to get this role.

I'm going to get this role.

You really shouldn't put so much

pressure on yourself, Clover.

I'm not putting pressure on myself, I'm psyching myself up.

And I'm just looking up for my best friend.

Yeah, practically everybody in the school is auditioning.

Everybody who's anybody plus a few nobodies.

What are you trying to say, Sam?

I'm not good enough to play the poor orphan Cosette?

Of course you are.

In fact, you're the most dramatic person I know.

But you learning all those lines?

What?

Starring in a play is about more than just memorizing lines,

Sam.

I mean, I wouldn't expect a bookworm like you

to understand art, that's for true virtuosos

like Picasso, da Vinci, Madonna, and, of course, me.

[laughter]

Next please.

Oh monsieur Valjean, what ill fortune

to be poor with no family.

Uh, I even had to sell my car just to be

able to get enough to eat.

Thank you.

That will be all, Clover.

[applause]

Thank you. Thank you one and all.

I'm so happy to be playing the role that I so richly deserve.

I'll be signing autographs in the lunch room this afternoon.

Clover, although that was an interesting interpretation

of Les Mis, not exactly what we're looking for.

Next.

[crying]

Clover, aren't you getting a little carried away?

It's just a silly play.

A silly play?

This is my career we're talking about.

I mean, how could he not pick me?

I have perfect hair, perfect teeth, plus I just love Paris.

I'd like to see Mr. Tetley's teaching credentials.

You know, Clover, you should be

happy you didn't get this part.

I mean, rehearsing over and over.

Oh, Monsieur Valjean, what ill fortune

to be poor with no family.

Sounds like such a drag.

That's it.

That was brilliant, Samantha, you were born to play Cosette

and I won't take no for an answer.

Uh, thanks a lot Mr. Tetley, but Clover

should really get this part.

You know, she's a very talented actress

plus she has great teeth.

See?

But Samantha, you've got the makings of a star.

No really, Clover's my girlfriend and--

Perhaps even a Hollywood star.

When do rehearsals start?

When do rehearsals start?

I can't believe you, you little traitor.

It's not my fault I'm star material.

Cut it out, you guys, you're supposed to be friends.

Since you girls are in such a talkative mood,

perhaps one of you would like to tell

the class what you think the most dramatic

scene in "Les Miserables" is.

Well I for one think it's the scene

in which Jean Valjean escapes through the Paris sewers.

Greetings, my academic colleagues.

Oh you must be Parcival, the [inaudible] ambassador's son.

Indubitably.

Oh by the way, sir, I always felt

it would be appropriate to discuss "Les Miserables"

in the context of a major strain in 19th century literature

emphasizing pauperisation.

An interesting theory, Percival, you should do

just fine on tomorrow's quiz.

Quiz?

What quiz?

The quiz on the first 10 chapters of Les Mis.

That is, for those of you who didn't get a role in the play.

So, do you girls want to go to the mall tonight?

I would but now I have a quiz to study for.

You know, ever since somebody stole my part in the play.

How about you, Sam?

I have to go over my lines.

You know what they say, the more practice, the more perfect.

I guess I'll go it alone, then.

[screaming]

Nice timing, Jerry.

Yeah, we were right in the middle of an important fight.

Sorry, girls, but it's an international emergency.

You see, the annual Nobel Prize winners

conference is going on today.

The world's top scholars are there.

International emergency?

Sounds more like an international snooze fest.

Yeah, where can we not get tickets?

As you can see on this hotel surveillance video,

several prize winners have been mysteriously kidnapped.

They must be found.

Did I mention the conference is in Paris?

Paris?

And now for the gadgets.

This week we have steel cable launcher go-go boots, jet pack

backpacks, infrared heat detector glasses, exploding

lipstick, and last but not least,

emergency propeller watches in vibrant spring colors.

And one more thing ladies.

Tomorrow, you'll be having a surprise quiz in biology.

Two quizzes in one day?

That's totally unfair.

Unfair for some of us.

Couldn't you at least tell us what the quiz is on, Jer?

Sorry, but it would be completely unethical for me

to disclose that the test is covering

the chapter on cro-magnon man.

Oops.

Oh, would you look at the time, I've really got to run.

Ciao.

I hope this thing's on autopilot.

Vacuumed up?

Vanished?

But why?

OK spies, keep your eyes open for anything strange

and try to blend in.

Excuse me, miss, aren't you the one

who wrote that article about the expansion of the universe?

That's me.

Brains and beauty.

And yourself?

What have you written?

Well, my specialty is prehistoric men,

in particular cro-magnon.

Can you believe it?

This guy could actually help us on our biology quiz.

Friends and colleagues, I just found out

that the specialist on the expansion of the universe

has honored us with her presence.

Would you be so kind as to share your latest findings with us?

OK, um, actually the universe is as easy as pie.

It's like one big shopping mall.

Yeah, that's it.

See, it starts out small but the more business it does,

the more it expands.

So no need to worry.

By the way, did I tell you?

I just love Paris.

[screaming]

I don't see anything.

Me neither.

It's like she vanished into thin air.

[screaming]

What a disaster.

He's the foremost authority on 19th century French literature.

OK, this is officially weird.

Weird would be an understatement, Sammy.

Two people just got vacuumed into the ceiling

like dust bunnies.

No not the abductions, the people who got abducted.

You want to try that again in English, Miss Cosette?

Think about it.

Jerry tells us we'll be quizzed on cro-magnon man in biology

tomorrow and the cro-magnon specialist gets kidnapped.

We're also supposed to have a test on "Les Miserables"

and, guess what?

The expert on 19th century French literature

just vanished.

First of all, we aren't being tested on "Les Miserables."

Second of all, do you actually expect us to believe that there

is a connection between these kidnappings

and our quizzes in LA?

That's exactly what I expect you

to believe, miss sore loser.

Easy does it, girls.

Look, we'll just ask Jerry for the subject of all

our upcoming quizzes and then see

if any of the prize winners at the conference

are experts on those subjects.

No way.

Absolutely not.

I am not allowed to reveal quiz subjects to you girls.

But this is different, it's for our mission.

It could be a matter of life and someone

being sucked into the ceiling.

Well, when you put it that way.

Your next quiz is in math class.

The topic is Isaac Newton but that's all I'm telling you.

Since when do we study cookie designers in math class?

Newton isn't a cookie designer, you dimwit.

Who you calling a dimwit, traitor?

Hey, girls, look, there's an expert on Isaac Newton right

here in the conference catalog.

He just went into that restaurant.

Are you two still harping on that role in the play?

You obviously have never been stabbed in the back

by one of your best friends.

Ah ha, I knew it, you admit that Sam's

one of your best friends.

Hey, look at this.

[screaming]

We've got to get down there, our expert's

clearly the next in line.

You're in danger.

[screaming]

Quick, the jet pack backpacks.

Help.

Incredible, the kidnappers vacuum their victims

up into these tubes.

Not if we have anything to say about it.

Let our friend go right now.

And tell us why you've kidnapped

the Nobel Prize winners.

[laughter]

Oh well, look at the time.

Got to fly.

I think you mean gotta run.

Hey, don't leave me here.

I thought we were friends.

What now, miss bookworm?

How should I know?

Well, you better think of something fast, Cosette.

Wait, that's it, in "Les Miserables" Jean Valjean

escapes through the sewers.

Look out.

Ew nast, I'd rather fight those jerks

than go into this filthy pipe.

I mean, hello, my complexion is too sensitive.

[screaming]

You'll pay for this, Sam, and I mean I mean that literally.

It's going to cost a fortune to have my go-go boots cleaned.

Forget about them.

We'll just interrogate their girlfriend.

Good luck trying to pry anything out of that one.

Oh, I can be very persuasive.

You're lucky Sam thought of the sewers.

Otherwise, you would have been French toast.

Wait a second, I'm getting a weak signal

from Alex's com powder.

I'll patch it through.

Help.

What are you two waiting for?

An invitation?

I'm locking in on her location.

Oh my, it appears she's being held at 12118 Marmalade St.

But that's--

The house next door to mine.

That's right.

And according to WOOHP records, that's

where the ambassador from [inaudible] his son

have been living for the past two weeks.

Isn't that the fat headed kid from Mr. Tetley's class?

Yeah.

We'd better get back to Beverly Hills.

Farewell [inaudible] Paris.

I'm going to ask you one last time,

where's WOOHP headquarters?

I wouldn't tell you in a million years, chump.

Just you wait and see what I do to you when I get out of here.

OK, you want to play games?

Fine.

I've got a game for you.

[screaming]

It's about time you two got here.

I warned you not to mess with me.

Not bad for a bookworm.

Now let's find the Nobel Prize winners.

Yeah, we got all three of them, boss.

Good.

Bring them in.

Hey, it's the big head freak from our school.

Pi r squared times logarithm of c y equals--

It's like they're sucking the intelligence

from the prize winners and putting it into his head.

No wonder he's such a know it all.

Mr. Ambassador.

Ambassador?

That's right, girls.

And also soon the father of the most

intelligent child in the world.

My son will be a genius in no time, a star pupil in school.

No one dare pick on him that way they picked on me.

So let me get this straight.

You kidnapped those scholars just to suck out their brains

and pump them into your son's head?

Yes.

And you think he won't get picked on?

Hello, the guy's head is the size of a hot air balloon.

[giggling]

We'll see who gets the last laugh.

He's going to turn us into hamsters.

Keen observation.

The hamster is really going to benefit from your intelligence.

[screaming]

Hey Alex, do that again.

No way, it hurts.

But if you keep it up, you just might break through.

[alarm ringing]

That was close.

Another job well done, girls.

Thanks, Jerry.

Wait a minute, couldn't you have broken out

of your cylinders yourselves?

You both have propeller watches.

Yeah, I suppose.

Yeah, and risk getting unsightly facial bruises?

I don't think so.

Girls, aren't you forgetting something important?

That is one freak show I want no part of.

Hey, what do you know, it's working.

Nice job, Alex, you saved the world.

Guess this means from now on he'll

have to study for tests just like the rest of us.

Oh wait, I forgot, some of us are exempt from tests.

Lucky thing there was almost no fluid left in the tube.

You all right, girls?

A little grossed out but otherwise fine.

I can't--

I can't believe you just did that for me.

You totally saved my life, Sam.

Not to mention my outfit.

Well, I wouldn't have done it for just anybody.

Only for a best friend?

Exactly.

Oh Sammy, I'm so sorry I called

you a thief and a traitor.

No No I'm the one who should be sorry.

I never should have accepted the role of Cosette.

Oh no, it's time for our quiz on "Les Miserables."

No.

Quick to Beverly High.

I forgot all about it.

Heck, I don't know squat about "Les Miserables."

Neither do I.

What are we going to do?

Don't worry about it, girls.

I'll tell you everything you need to know.

After all, that's what best friends are for.

Good because we also need help cramming for our biology

quiz on the cro-mags.

Wow, who knew an artist like me

could also excel at academics.

Looks like we're all multi-talented.

Speaking of which, what did you guys

decide to do about the play?

It's simple.

I'm going to convince Mr. Tetley that Clover

is the right actress for the part of Cosette.

And I'm going to insist that he

make Sam my first understudy.

Mr. Tetley, we need to talk to you right away.

Yeah, it's about the part of Cosette.

Shh, not now, girls.

Oh Monsieur Valjean, what ill fortunate

to be poor with no family.

That's it.

That was brilliant, Mandy, you were born to play Cosette

and I won't take no for an answer.

Mandy, you've got the makings of a star.

Tell me something I don't know.

That traitor.

That backstabber.

Here we go again.

[music playing]