Original subtitles

Pipiru piru piru pipiru pii.

Pipiru piru piru pipiru pii.

nande mo dekichau BATTO ESUKARIBORUGU!

A bat that can do anything, Excalibolg!

Pipiru piru piru pipiru pii.

Pipiru piru piru pipiru pii.

mahou no gion de jinsei yarinaoshite ageru

With the magical imitation sounds, I'll let you relive your life.

iya yo dame yo konna no BAKABAKA

I don't want to. You can't do such a thing, stupid, stupid!

sonna ni GIRAGIRA shinaide

Don't glare so much.

onegai dakara eii!

Please... yay!

bokusatsu tenshi

Bludgeoning Angel.

chi shibuki DOKUDOKU DOKURO-chan

Blood-spray pouring, pouring Dokuro-chan.

bokusatsu tenshi

Bludgeoning Angel.

shinzou DOKUDOKU DOKURO-chan

Heart pounding, pounding Dokuro-chan.

funde shibatte tataite

Step on! Tie up! Beat!

kette jirashite tsurushite

Kick! Tease! Hang!

demo sore tte BOKU no "ai" na no

But that is my "love."

bokusatsu tenshi

Bludgeoning Angel.

BATTO de DOSUDOSU DOKURO-chan

With a bat, bam-bam Dokuro-chan.

bokusatsu tenshi

Bludgeoning Angel.

chi midoro dorodoro DOKURO-chan

Blood-stained muddled, muddled Dokuro-chan.

kitte nagutte nabutte

Slice! Punch! Torment!

sashite sarashite tarashite

Pierce! Expose! Dribble!

demo sore tte BOKU no "ai" na no

But that is my "love."

Pipiru piru piru pipiru pii.

Dokuro-chan! Where are you, Dokuro-chan?

Lunchtime is going to end soon!

Episode 7

It's Zakuro-chan!

Dokuro-chan!

Please excuse me!

What's going on? What were you doing in the staff lounge?

What's with this strange high spirit?

Actually, there's something I want you to see.

But I'm kind of embarrassed here.

Gym Storage Room

So what is it that you wanted to show me?

Well...

...what I want you to see...

Could it be, "Please look at all of me"?

Oh no! It's Excalibolg!

Woodworking Bond Club

Representative Dokuro Mitsukai

Woodworking bond club?

Woodworking bond club!

What? Is that a club?

It's a club that watches white woodworking bond glue dry clear.

Let's do our best!

I don't want to join that club! Why are you just signing me up?

It might be hard, but it's definitely worth it!

Let's aim for the national tournament!

I refuse!

You can't give up before you try! I'll let you be the chief!

Definitely no!

What?

What is this?

This stuff smells weird!

Hey, why aren't you saying anything, Dokuro-chan?

It's not coming off! It's not coming off! It's drying! It's drying!

Help me, Dokuro-chan.

Hey, why are you laughing and not saying anything?

No, no!

You're a little crazy! Stop, you can't eat that!

Murderer! Help me! I'm sorry!

Murderer! Help me! I'm sorry! Open wide!

No!

There of all places!

No, it'll be taken the wrong way!

Something's weird. Hairy weird. Help, Dokuro-chan!

Yes?

I get it. I get it, Dokuro-chan.

I'll join the woodworking bond club!

Mayonnaise Bank

Count Mayonnaise

But why was a club like this recognized?

It's a woodworking bond club...

Yamazaki

This... This seal...

Yamazaki It's blood! Written in blood!

Sakura-kun! Perfect timing.

What's up, Yuko-sensei?

Sorry, could you tell everyone that 2nd-year class A's gym class...

...has become a study hall?

Why?

Apparently, Mr. Yamazaki isn't feeling well.

What?

So please take care of that.

T-This printout...

If you look closely, there's water blotting it in places. These are tears.

These are Mr. Yamazaki's tears.

Dokuro-chan!

What?

You know he has a child who's turning three years old.

He's working hard!

Tell me! What'd you do to him in the staff lounge?

Nerves in teeth...

No, never mind! Don't say it! Don't hesitate to not say it!

Aren't you an angel? You can't torture someone and make a new club!

I can!

Maybe you're not aware enough that you're the star member.

I am?

Hold on! Right now...

No! This has already been decided!

What should I do?

I never thought it would turn out like this.

D-Don't... twist...

Pipiru piru piru pipiru pii!

Dokuro-chan, I've said this plenty of times...

...but if you insert a foreign object into my body, I die.

Please remember that.

Okay!

Why the awkward silence?

Hey, everyone!

This is "harbinger dodgeball," which uses a heavy basketball...

...till the team with no one moving loses!

Stop playing this dangerous killer dodgeball!

More importantly, listen, guys! Mr. Yamazaki was...

Study Hall

Hey, let's stop.

This is supposed to be prohibited. You know what this is?

Pokkuri-san!

Don't say it so happily!

This is a terrifying game of the unknown!

Why? No! What are you doing!

No! I'm scared!

Pokkuri-san, Pokkuri-san, are you present?

No!

Yes

Hold on, Dokuro-chan, you just moved it. You definitely did!

Has Sakura-kun done bad things to the recorder...

...of someone he likes after school?

Hey, what are you asking?

Hey, what are you asking? Be quiet.

Na...

Me...

Na...

Me...

Licked it...

Sakura-kun...

No, it's a misunderstanding!

No, it's a misunderstanding! Next question!

Please tell us the name of the person Sakura-kun likes!

What!

Na... me... na... me...

Namename-san.

Who's that? They don't exist!

It's still moving.

Do...

Ku...

Not in front of Shizuki-chan...

No...

Sakura-kun, don't put pressure on your fingertips.

I'm not doing anything!

Hold on, Dokuro-chan, sto...

Are you all right, Sakura-san?

You weren't hurt, were you?

Zakuro-chan!

It's been a while, Onee-sama.

Onee-sama?

Forgive me for not introducing myself. I came from the future...

...to bring my elder sister Dokuro back. My name is Zakuro.

Thank you for caring for her.

That's my line. She's been taking care of me here and there...

Is it true you're her little sister?

Seriously?

Is it true?

Is it a lie?

Written "truth" and read "serious"?

What part of your body do you like?

Seriously, how old are you?

I'm nine.

Are you able to take a bath on your own already?

I'm still scared to do it alone.

Why is it always you...

Stop! Why do you have something like this set up?

Zakuro-chan, what did you just say?

I said I came to bring you back, Onee-sama.

That's it! Zakuro-chan, what do you mean?

It's like Dokuro-chan's going back to the future!

Precisely. It is an imperial command.

As an angel with the "Angel Precinct of the Martial Law Council"...

...alias Lulutie, rather than killing Sakura Kasukabe...

...she's taking action to save his life.

This is treason and not something an angel who serves god...

...can be forgiven for.

We need her to return immediately.

And she will never be able to return to this world.

Please don't offer any pointless resistance.

Dokuro-chan, it's bad, zansu! Lulutie is aware of our actions, and...

So it was you helping my sister out after all, Zansu-san.

You're there, Zakuro-chan? Run for it, Dokuro-chan!

While I stop her in her tracks. Hurry!

The Killer Wet Towel "Eckelzax"!

It's Zakuro-chan's magic item! If you put it on the face of someone sleeping...

Dokuro-chan isn't wrong, zansu.

Dokuro-chan, hurry and run!

Onee-sama, please go back to the future quietly.

Zakuro-chan, what'll happen to Sakura-kun when I'm gone?

Until other orders comes from Lulutie, I will watch him 24 hours a day.

Dokuro-chan?

She ran from here.

I will find her without fail.

You will help me, correct?

Sir, yes, sir!

Wait, you guys don't have to.

Hey, hold on, guys!

What about study hall? The girls too?

Hey, everyone!

Hey, Sakura-kun.

Shizuki-chan?

What are you going to do after you go after Dokuro-chan?

What do you mean by that?

It can't be helped. Dokuro-chan has to go back to the world of the future.

But at this rate, we'll probably never be able to see her again.

Are you okay with how things are right now?

Dokuro-chan was ruining your life, and you're fine with that?

I...

What about me...

Shizuki-chan...

Dummy.

Why don't you hurry and go?

Shizuki-chan...

If Dokuro-chan goes away, I'll be sad too.

We're probably the only class that has an angel as a friend.

Dokuro-chan's whereabouts... You probably know where she is, right?

Sabato-chan

Destitute Angel

Final Episode

It's Goodbye! Dokuro-chan!

Dokuro-chan?

Dokuro-chan, it's you, right?

Come out.

Welcome home, Sakura-kun.

I'm home, Dokuro-chan.

I...

...like...

Like what?

This room...

I get sleepy when I smell the scent of this room.

Hey...

I still want to stay in this room for a while.

Dokuro-chan...

We can't make it to the national tournament anymore either.

The woodworking bond club.

Oh yeah...

It was going to start today.

Yeah.

I put in so much to establish it.

Yeah.

From now on, please do your best on your own.

You're the woodworking bond club's last member.

That's a problem.

Promise that you'll become number one in the nation even if I'm not there.

I can't.

Promise!

Please, Sakura-kun...

You're prepared now, Onee-sama, aren't you?

I finally found you, Onee-sama.

Why me too?

Ow, ow! It's going to break! It's going to break!

Sakura-kun!

Don't look... Please, don't seriously look at me like this!

Onee-sama, are you saying you still won't go back?

No, that's physically impossible!

You're playing dirty, Zakuro-chan!

Even if it's you, Zakuro-chan, I'll make you pay!

How will you make me pay?

No! The towel's making me do daring...

These romantic positions are a first...

Please, Zakuro-chan! No more weird poses!

Or his strange qualities are going to be awakened!

You wish to be lowered?

You wish to be lowered? Of course!

Then, Sakura-san, please say this directly to my sister.

"I want her to go back to the world of the future."

What?

What? Zakuro-chan!

Sakura-san, you also know what will happen...

...if she stays here in this world, right?

Are you okay with how things are right now?

What'll happen to Dokuro-chan if she goes back to the world of the future?

Until she receives other orders, she will be in custody.

Don't worry. All your memories till this point will all be erased.

Is that...

...true, Dokuro-chan?

Yeah.

I'll release you from Eckelzax.

I leave it to you, Sakura-san.

From the very beginning, I thought...

..."What's with her?"

"How is she an angel?"

She never does anything and is always lazing around the house.

When she actually starts something, it's always getting in my way.

She eats the ice cream I was looking forward to having.

On top of that, she bludgeons me with her bat.

It's the worst.

Since Dokuro-chan came, not one single thing has gone right.

So...

...going back to the world of the future now is foul play, Dokuro-chan!

I just have to not invent that weird invention in the future, right?

I definitely won't!

I swear! I definitely won't invent something...

...that stops the aging of girls at 12 years old.

If I do, I'll become gay!

Hard gay!

Okay? So please!

Let's play more...

...together.

I didn't know Sakura-san thought of my sister in that light.

I assumed you were...

I understand.

Then...

Let's return to the future, Onee-sama.

What? Hold on a second! My wishes didn't reach you?

I said I wanted her to stay!

Wait, Zakuro-chan. Hold on, where are you going?

No, I'm not going!

We're going back.

Hold on, Zakuro-chan!

No! I want to stay here! I don't want to leave!

Dokuro-chan!

I have to tell Sakura-kun!

Dokuro-chan!

Sakura-kun! Sakura-kun!

Dokuro-chan!

Sakura-kun! Sakura-kun! Sakura-kun!

Dokuro-chan!

She really did go back.

Sakura, dinner's ready!

Hurry down!

Sakura-kun? Sakura-kun?

Sakura-kun!

Your soft serve is dripping.

Here.

Sorry, Shizuki-chan.

Good grief.

Kyoho grape is good too.

Next time I'll get the same one as you.

Is something bothering you?

No, nothing's really bothering me, but...

But you've been out of it a lot lately.

If I tell you, maybe you won't laugh at me.

Yup, I won't laugh.

Well, I can't express it that well, but...

We're...

...here like this, right?

You and I, right?

Yeah.

And how it's so peaceful and calm here right now...

How can I put this...

Well...

I feel like it's a total dream.

Well, meaning...

I can't believe that...

...that I can be sitting here safely eating soft serve.

Did I say something weird?

No, it's not weird.

It's not weird, but...

But?

You're surprisingly a poet.

A poet? No, you misunderstand!

This isn't an abrupt and indirect confession of love by a wannabe poet!

No, I know.

I'm off.

Ah, okay.

See you.

Sorry for the sudden notice. Bye-bye.

I have to get it together.

I apologize! I don't have money today!

Even if I jump, you won't hear coins!

Hold on, this isn't a mugging.

Sabato-chan.

Yes, I finally found you.

Sabato-chan, why...

Be quiet.

Something terrible is happening in the future.

That...

That angel snapped, and everything's a mess.

That angel needs you, Sakura-kun.

Hurry and go back to the house.

Zakuro-chan! Perfect timing!

Sabato-san, why are you...

I was voluntarily looking for Sakura-kun and...

...Dokuro-chan, who escaped from the future!

Where are they?

I was so close, but they got away!

It seems they escaped towards the northern peninsula across the sea.

This is the failure of my life.

I can't afford to lose sight of him now...

Stop grumbling and go after them!

I'll go around this way.

It's just this once.

Sakura-kun.

Dokuro-chan!

Dokuro-chan! Sakura-kun, Sakura-kun!

It's really you!

Yes, it's really me!

I came back to this world!

It's really, really Dokuro-chan! The real thing!

Right?

No!

Pipiru piru piru...

Pipiru piru piru...

Pipiru piru piru pipiru pii!

Welcome home, Dokuro-chan!

I'm home, Sakura-kun!

This is the story of a pretty normal human like myself...

...and the slightly flustered Dokuro-chan whom I love...

...and the story of bloodshed that brings love, courage, and hope.

yume nante motanakute ii

You don't have to have a dream.

ima wo ikite iru nara

As long as you are living now.

shiranakute ii koto mo aru

There are things that you don't need to know.

INOCHI mamoru tame nara

If it's to save your life.

mamotte ageru

I will protect you.

BOKU wo shinjite

Believe in me.

shinjitsu wa zankoku na mono

The truth is a cruel thing.

BOKU no koto dake wo ima wa

Please look at just me...

mitsumete

...right now.

And now the news.

A suspicious character was reported under a bridge.

As the police tried to capture the suspicious girl, she escaped.

Residents of the neighborhood, please be appropriately cautious.

Next up...

A mysterious character appeared atop a statue in a country to the north.

The government mobilized 600,000 soldiers to handle the situation...

...but it's rumored the character is Japanese.

As proof, we've received information...

...that she was screaming, "Where is Onee-sama?" in Japanese.

On this, state officials of the country to the north relayed...

...that "Japan has likely initiated the "Akihabara moe-moe operation."

They are claiming this actively and repeating this baffling broadcast.

That's it for the main news at this time.