Original subtitles

HARRY NASH: You remember when Beauty

said I love you to the Beast?

His ugliness dissolved, changed, like magic.

But, you see, I'm still the same.

Let no one help me-- no one.

His cunning, I feel already shot with marble, glugged with lead.

Here lies Hercule de Savinien de Cyrano de Bergerac.

I can see him!

There.

He grins.

Death!

He's looking at my nose!

That skeleton.

What's that, you say?

Hopeless.

You there!

Who are you, 100 against one?

Nah!

I know it now.

My ancient enemies, forthward!

There!

There!

Prejudice, cowardess, compromise.

Nah!

You too, vanity.

I knew you'd overthrow me in the end.

Nah!

I fight on.

I fight on.

One thing unspotted from the world, in spite of doom I know,

and that is--

-Oh.

And that is?

-My white plume.

WOMAN: Oh!

Ooh.

[crying]

-Pull the curtain.

Pull the curtain.

-Did you girls like the play?

-It was marvelous.

-Thank you.

Thank you very much.

-Great show, Doris!

-Doris--

-Thank you.

-Oh, you were just fine, you know.

Just fine.

-No.

I mean what are you-- what are we going to do next--

[chattering]

-That was Cyrano.

-You're right.

You're right.

-Here, director.

-George, what do you think we should do next?

-What about doing "Marat/Sade"?

-No, no.

Minnie, would you light this?

[chattering]

-I've been waiting all evening for this.

-Hey, old man, how's--

[chattering]

-Hi George.

-Hi.

How'd you like the play?

-It was terrific.

That Harry sure is something, isn't he?

-Oh, have you decided what we're doing next?

-Listen.

Streetcar Named Desire would be a fascinating play.

-I love that play.

-Couldn't you choose something a little more demanding?

-Well, you see, Harry would be a terrific Stanley.

-Hey.

Where are we going to find a Stella?

-I can answer that.

I was born to play Stella.

-What do you think, Doris?

-I think it's a wonderful play.

-Good.

When do you want to have auditions?

-Well, I'm sorry to tell you this,

but I'm not going to direct this one.

MAN: What?

-What?

WOMAN: Doris, what are you talking about?

-No.

No.

No, I mean it.

Momma's been sick, and I'm not going to have the time.

Besides, it's ruining my social life.

MAN: Ah, Doris--

-Well, Doris--

-After all, it's time that the club

developed some other directors.

I'm not going to live forever.

-But you can't quit.

Who else can do it?

-Doris isn't directing?

-No, dear boy.

-Well, who else can direct?

-Excuse me.

Andrew, give me a hand.

-Great.

I finally get her primed up to give me the lead,

and now I have to start buttering up somebody else.

-Attention, everybody.

I want to thank you all for coming out and supporting

the North Crawford Mask and Wit Club.

And I-- I especially want to thank

all of my fellow thespains-- Selma and Minnie, Andrew,

Albert, Lydia, George, Les, and, of course, our star, who

unfortunately couldn't join us tonight, Harry Nash.

[applause]

-Our next production is going to be A Streetcar Named Desire.

MAN: Wow!

[commotion]

-And, by popular demand, the director

will be George Johnson.

MAN: George Johnson!

[laughter]

[applause]

[congratulations from crowd]

MAN: You're going to be great!

[chattering]

-Hi Phoebe, how are you?

Hi Marilyn.

How are you?

-Hi George.

-Hey, Jack.

How you doing?

[women talking in background]

-Uh, excuse me?

[women talking in background]

-Uh, miss?

-Good morning, sir.

May I help you?

-Well, yeah, I hope so.

Uh, miss, I've got this charge on my telephone bill

for a long distance call to Ha-- for a long distance call

to Honolulu.

Uh, I don't think anyone in North Crawford

has ever called Honolulu, or ever will, for that matter.

-I'm very sorry, sir.

The company has just installed new automatic billing machines,

and we don't have all the bugs out yet.

-Oh.

-Occasionally they make mistakes.

I'll take this charge right off your bill.

-Oh.

Well, that's a relief.

I thought I was going to have a real hassle getting

this thing straightened out.

You know, I've dealt with those computers before.

-Oh, no, sir.

This will just take a second.

If you can wait, I'll give you a credit memo.

-I haven't seen you around North Crawford before, have I?

-No, sir.

I just arrived with the new automatic billing machines.

-Well, that's an improvement.

[laugh] I guess as long as people come along

with the machines, then we've got nothing to worry about.

It's-- it's when the machines start delivering themselves

that, uh-- that, uh, people had better start worrying.

-Oh.

GEORGE: Ah.

Uh, excuse me.

Um, have you-- have you ever acted?

Uh, what do you do with the machine?

-Well, I teach the local girls how to operate them.

GEORGE: Ah.

How long are you going to be in North Crawford?

-I stay in each place eight weeks, sir.

Then I take a new machine to a new town.

-Well, see, the reason I'm asking

is-- uh, well, I've got into this idea.

You see, we-- we're having auditions

for our dramatic club.

We're doing a new play.

And, uh, why don't you come over?

There's a part in there that'd be perfect for you.

-I've been going from town to town for two years.

That's the very first time anyone

has ever approached me about participating in a community

thing.

There

-There isn't any other way to get

to know a lot of nice people faster than being in a play.

Uh, my name's George Johnson.

Oh. [laugh]

-Helene Shaw.

Oh.

Well, it's so nice to meet you.

Anyway.

The auditions are this Saturday.

We'd all like you to come.

They're at the school library-- 12 o'clock sharp.

-Well, I-- I just might show up and surprise you.

GEORGE: Oh.

-And myself.

[laugh]

-Hey, Clyde.

Whoa.

-George.

-Oh, yeah.

Oh, hi, Albert.

-George, I'm glad I caught you.

-Oh yeah?

I'm in a hurry.

-There's something I gotta show you.

-OK, but I'm in a hurry, Albert.

-Wait for it.

-What?

-Stella!

-Oh, lord.

Oh, hey, listen.

I'm glad you're working so hard on the character, Albert.

Wait.

I've got something else.

Wait and see-- Eunice, I want my girl to come down with me.

Eunice!

I can do it--

-Ah, ba-ba-ba-ba.

Uh, we're just kidding around, folks-- just kidding around.

Listen.

I already told you-- Harry's playing Stanley, all right?

-I admit Harry's pretty good and all of that,

but there are some parts others are better-suited to play.

-OK.

Now, listen to me, Albert.

In the past year, Harry has played Captain Queeg.

He's played Abe Lincoln.

He's played the young architect in "The Moon is Blue."

He's played Doc in "Come Back, Little Sheba,"

and he's played Cyrano de Bergerac.

That's a pretty good cross-section,

wouldn't you say, Albert?

-I've had a few credits too, you know.

-Oh, I know.

Listen-- but I've gotta go, Albert.

I really do.

Harry.

Harry?

Vern?

Lydia?

Anybody?

HARRY: [counting]

-Harry?

Oh, Harry.

-60, 80.

[counts under breath] 55, 56--

-[clears throat]

-Vern and Lydia aren't here, George.

-Oh, well, I really came to see you, Harry.

Uh, hey, um-- that was some fine performance last night, Harry.

-Vern and Lydia aren't here.

[crash]

-Oh, uh-- uh.

-I'll take care of it.

-Anyway, I suppose you've heard about the, uh-- the next play.

[laugh] They asked me to direct, Harry.

And I-- I know you've only worked with Doris before, uh,

so I hope that isn't a problem.

You've seen me act, Harry.

Uh, directing can only be a step up, you know? [laugh] That club

needs you, Harry.

I mean, actually, I need you, Harry.

I don't even know if I can direct traffic,

let alone a play.

Would you consider playing the lead in this one, Harry?

-Who am I this time?

-Ah.

-I'm not sure it would have made any difference where-- where I

saw him.

-Now don't say it was one of those mysterious electric

things between people.

If you do, I'll laugh right in your face.

-I am not going to say anything more at all about it

-All right, then.

Don't.

-But there are things that happen between a man and a--

-Uh, Minnie.

Minnie, thanks.

That's-- thank you so much.

Thank you.

-Uh, George, are you going to have my, uh, storm windows

ready next week?

You know, the least expensive ones we talked about?

-Uh, the, uh, the plain aluminium triple-track?

-Right, George.

I

-Yeah.

I'll have it-- I'll have it taken care of.

Yeah.

Minnie, you want to send the next one in for me?

-Right.

Sure.

Thanks, George.

-Well, we've got our Blanches.

-[sigh]

-He had his nose smashed in by our wedding night.

- --ain't you?

Well, I ought to go home pretty soon.

-Shut up.

MAN: I've got a sick mother. [inaudible].

[ACTORS PRACTICING LINES IN BACKGROUND]

-Next.

[knocking]

-Come in.

-Harry?

-You told me you were having tryouts.

-Uh, yeah, but I didn't mean you, Harry.

-Now, George, don't you think Harry

should get a chance, just like all the others?

No favorites.

Right, Harry?

-Right.

-Oh, yeah.

You're absolutely right, Doris.

Yeah.

If you don't mind waiting a while, Harry.

Uh, why don't you go out in the hall

and study your scripts some more, OK?

-Thanks.

-Harry.

Did you happen to see a pretty new girl out there?

-I didn't notice.

-That's amazing.

He always acts like there's some doubt

he's going to get a part in the play.

-I wouldn't care if he auditioned standing

on his head, as long as he keeps on giving us

those performances of his.

-Yeah, but I can't even get a two-way conversation

going with him.

[knocking]

Oh.

Miss Shaw.

Hi.

Hi.

Excuse me, Doris.

Come on in.

Oh, am I delighted to see you.

-Well, I told you that I might surprise both of us.

-Well, I'm delightfully surprised.

Come on in.

Uh, Doris, I-- I'm sorry.

What's your first name again?

-Helene.

-I want you to meet Helene Shaw.

DORIS: Hello there.

-I thought she'd be perfect-- perfect for the part of Stella,

right?

DORIS: Hmm.

-Oh, uh, listen.

Why don't yo u just read, uh, the-- the scene here, OK?

And, uh, Doris will read the part of Blanche.

All right?

-I'm not sure it would have made any difference where I met him.

DORIS: If you say it was one of those mysterious electric

things between people, I'll laugh right in your face.

HELENE: I'm not going to say anything more at all about it.

-All right, then.

Don't.

-But there are things that happen

between a man and a woman in the dark that sort of make

everything else seem unimportant.

-Helene, dear, passion.

Passion, Helene.

Stella is a very passionate girl.

She needs someone like Stanley in order to feel alive.

The animal in him excites her!

-I'll try it again.

DORIS: Please, with a little more feeling.

Now, pretend George is Stanley, and that you love him

very passionately.

On second thought, just try to imagine Stanley.

Now.

Let's take it from where we left off.

What you are talking about is brutal desire-- just desire.

The name of that rattletrap old streetcar

that bangs through the water quarter,

up one old narrow street and down another.

Well, all right, dear.

Read the lines.

-Oh, yeah.

Um, haven't you ever ridden that streetcar?

DORIS: It brought me here, where I'm not wanted

and where I'm ashamed to be.

-Then don't you think your superior altitude

is a bit out of place?

-That's attitude, dear.

-Oh.

Oh, yes.

Attitude.

-I am not being or feeling at all superior, Stella.

Believe me.

It's just this.

This is the way I look at.

A man like that is someone to go out with once,

twice-- three times, when the devil is in you.

But live with?

Have a child by?

-I have told you I love him.

GEORGE: Uh, Helene?

Uh, excuse me, Doris.

Uh, may I ask you a personal question?

-All right.

-Have you ever been in love?

What-- what I was thinking is that, if you remember

some old love, you know, that you had,

then it might help to bring some warmth into your acting.

-Well, I travel around a lot, you know,

and, um, and practically all the men in the companies

that I visit-- they're all married.

And I'm never in town long enough to meet any

of the people who aren't.

-Uh, what about school?

Like puppy love, and all the other kinds of love in school?

-Well, even in school I moved around a lot,

because my father was a construction worker

and he was always following jobs around.

And I was always saying hello or goodbye to some place.

Um, would movie stars count?

I mean, not in real life.

I never met any.

But, I mean, to step on the screen?

-I guess that's love of a kind.

-Because I used to sit through movies over and over again,

you know, and pretend that I was married

to whoever the-- the man movie star was.

-[laugh]

-They were the only people that ever went with us.

No matter where we went, those movie stars were always there.

-Yeah.

Well, uh, listen.

Uh, thanks, Helene.

It's-- thank you for coming by.

And we'll let you know what we decide, all right?

Thank you.

-Thanks very much for letting me try out.

-Oh, you're welcome, dear.

-You finally find your Stella and it turns out

she doesn't know what Helene is.

HELENE: [crying]

GEORGE: Helene.

What's the matter, dear?

-I'm terrible, aren't I?

-No.

No, you're not.

You're fine.

-No I'm not.

It was awful.

I--

-You were really--

- --like I was a walking icebox or something.

-Oh, nobody could look at you and say that, dearie.

-When people get to know me, that's when they do say it.

I don't want to be the way that I am.

I just can't help it.

I feel like I'm in-- well, when I get to know somebody nice,

you know, and-- like, in real life--

I feel like I'm in some kind of a bottle, as thought I can't

touch that person, no matter how hard I try.

I know what this play's about.

I know what Stella's feeling.

I-- I know why she feels it.

I just-- I-- I--

-You what, dear?

-I-- I just-- I don't know how to begin.

DORIS: Oh, Helene.

GEORGE: Oh--

-Are you ready for me yet, George?

There's nobody else outside.

-Harry, come here.

I'm-- I'm sorry I kept you waiting, Harry.

Excuse me.

Uh, Harry, this is Helene Shaw.

Helene, this is Harry Nash.

Uh, now, if you get the part of Stella,

he'll be your husband in the play.

Say, I, uh, I wonder if, uh, if you two would

read a scene for me from this play, all right?

Right here.

Do that?

-Sure.

GEORGE: Huh?

-If Stella's game.

-Huh?

-Stella.

Stella-- that's you.

Stella's my wife.

And where's the money, if the place got sold?

-Oh, not sold-- lost.

Lost.

-Open your eyes to this stuff.

You think she got this out of teacher's pay?

-Hush.

-Look at these feathers and furs she

come here to preen herself in!

What is this?

A solid gold dress, I believe.

And this?

What is these, here, fox pieces?

Genuine fox fur pieces a half a mile long.

-No.

Those are inexpensive summer furs

that, um, Blanche has had a long time.

-I got an acquaintance that deals

in this sort of merchandise.

I'll have him here to appraise it.

I'm willing to bet you there's thousands

of dollars invested in this stuff here.

-Don't be such an idiot, Stan.

-And this.

What is this, here?

The treasure chest of a pirate?

-Stanley.

-Pearls!

Ropes of them!

What is this sister of yours, a deep sea diver?

-Be still, Stanley.

-And diamonds.

A crown for an empress.

-It's a rhinestone tiara.

She wore it to a costume ball.

-Are you kidding?

I've got an acquaintance works in a jewelry store.

I'll have him in here to appraise this.

Here's our plantation, or what's left of it, here.

-You have no idea how stupid and horrid you're being.

Now, close that trunk before she comes out the bathroom.

Now, I'm going to go outside, and I

want you to come with me while Blanche is getting dressed.

-Since when do you give me orders?

-Are you going to stay here and insult her?

-You're damn tootin' I'm going to stay here!

-You are not!

You-- you animal!

-Animal?

HELENE: Yes!

-I'll teach you!

HELENE: Ah!

- --animal, you!

-Don't you dare call me names!

-I'll call you what I like.

HELENE: No you won't, and you--

-Stupid!

-Ah!

Don't you hit me either!

Brute, you, you monster!

[yells]

-George.

-[gasp]

-What do you want?

-[scream]

-Oh, yes, Ms. Galfrid.

I'm sorry.

We're-- we're finished.

Uh, there won't be any more noise.

I'm very sorry.

-Oh!

-Was that all right?

-Oh, uh, for a first reading, that wasn't too bad, Harry.

Yeah.

Is there a chance I get the part?

-Uh, I think we can safely say that we're-- we're leaning

powerfully in your direction, Harry.

Helene.

Miss Shaw.

-Huh.

-Uh, the part of Stella is yours.

You were just great.

-I had no idea you had that much fire in you.

Skyrockets, pinwheels, Roman candles.

-Uh, Helene.

You have my permission to go.

-Oh.

OK.

-Well, she's certainly not in that bottle anymore.

MAN: He's OK, now.

MAN: Oh, sure.

My boy's all right.

MAN: Put him on the bed and get a wet towel.

MAN: I think coffee would do him a world of good.

-Oh, my!

MAN: A cold shower.

-Let go of me, you son of a bitch.

-Let's get the hell out of here!

-Poker should not be played in a house with women.

Yes!

I want my girl to come down here.

-Ha.

-Stella!

[sobbing]

GEORGE: OK.

OK.

Terrific.

Good, good, good, good, good.

Harry and Helene.

Listen, you can save something for the actual performance.

You're going to burn yourselves out, all right?

You're going to burn yourselves out.

OK.

I'll see you at 7:00 tomorrow night.

-All right.

-All right?

-OK.

-Good rehearsal.

[chattering]

-Lydia, do we have a play or do we have a play?

-What play?

There isn't any play going on now.

-What?

-Hey you.

You through with me?

-What?

-(YELLING) Can I go home now?

-Sure, Harry, yeah.

-You aren't directing this play, George.

-What do y-- what are you saying?

What do you mean I'm not directing this play?

Who is?

LYDIA: Mother Nature at her worst.

What's going to happen to that girl when she discovers what

Harry really is, what Harry really isn't?

-I told the phone company that I don't

want to be moved around anymore.

-Really?

-Mhm.

What do you think about that?

-Oh.

What do I think?

-Mhm.

-Well, as club director, I'd say I'm very glad.

-Club director?

What about George Johnson?

-Uh, well, I'd say should you make that kind of decision now?

-George, I feel like my life is just beginning.

I've never been this happy.

-Does Harry know you decided to, uh, stay?

-He's totally preoccupied with learning his lines

and getting into his role and everything.

-Yeah.

If he gets any further into his role,

he'll never get out of it. [laugh]

-[laugh]

-You know, if I had a daughter, I'd

want her to be just like you.

-You're so sweet.

-Thank you, but I mean it.

-If I was your daughter, what advice would you give me?

Oh, advice?

I'd-- I just want you to have what you want to have.

Really, that's it.

Goodnight.

-Goodnight.

-All right, now.

When, uh-- when Lydia says, uh-- what?

-What is it?

Is it for me?

-Yeah.

What is it?

Is it for me?

Then Hel-- Helene, dear, please pay attention, all right?

Then Helene, you come down here at that point.

And Stanley-- Harry, you go over there, please.

OK?

OK.

Let's see.

What else?

What else is there?

I think I hear a bit of an earthquake.

I wonder if-- oh, that must be Albert's stomach grumbling.

OK.

Let's break.

-OK, everybody.

That's 20 minutes for lunch.

-20 minutes.

GEORGE: Oh.

-You know, Helene, as the leading actors,

we should really get to know one another better.

A friend of mine said--

-Not right now, Albert.

May I join you?

-Sure.

-Would you-- would you maybe like one of these?

No.

Go ahead.

Really.

-I'll take that.

-[laugh]

Um, mmm!

How about some nice hot soup?

OK?

I mean, really, you should eat much better meals, Harry.

You know, you have to keep up your energy.

Yeah.

Oh.

You know, if-- if, um, I were to stay a little bit longer

in North Crawford, I'd be very glad to make

you some really good meals.

I mean, if you-- if you'd like me to.

I know how you men are about your mom's cooking--

-[exhale]

- --and everything.

Um--

-Sorry.

-My mom was a wonderful cook.

She taught me how to cook when I was just a little girl.

I bet your mom's a great cook, huh?

-No.

-Oh, come on.

-I don't know.

-What do you mean you don't know?

-I w-- found.

-Found?

-On the steps of the Unitarian church.

-On the steps?

-I was told.

-No.

Um, there's still--

-Take that.

-But-- don't-- this is-- it's [inaudible].

-Oh, this is terrible!

-Absolute lunacy.

[commotion]

--[crying] I want to get out of here!

I want to get out!

-Poker should not be played in a house with women!

-I want my sister's clothes! [inaudible]

to that woman upstairs.

-Where are the clothes?

-OK, great.

Great, great, great.

Lydia, leap up on that line.

Leap up and move.

Helene, magnificent.

Ah.

OK.

Do not block him, all right?

OK.

Thank you.

It looks fantastic.

We've got a hit.

-Everybody be here 6:30 on Thursday, got it?

-These evening rehearsals are tiring, aren't they?

How are you and Harry getting along, Helene?

-Mmm.

Harry. [laugh] You know, Helene, I once

played Ann Rutledge opposite Harry.

He was Abraham Lincoln.

-Oh, that must have been heaven.

-It was, in a way.

Sometimes I'd get so caught up I'd

loved Harry like I'd love Abraham Lincoln.

[laugh] I'd have to come back to Earth

and remind myself that he wasn't ever going to free the slaves,

that he was just a clerk in my husband's hardware store.

-He's the most marvelous man I've ever met.

-One thing you have to get set for when you're

in a play with Harry is what happens

after the last performance.

-What are you talking about?

-Once the play is over, whatever you thought Harry was just

evaporates into thin air.

-[laugh] I don't believe you.

-Well, I admit it's hard to believe.

-What are you telling me for?

Why do you think that I care?

-I don't know, I just thought you might find it interesting.

-Well, I don't.

-Two minutes to curtain, everybody-- two minutes

to curtain!

Everybody in their spot.

-It sounds like--

-I didn't hear your name.

-My name's not on the sign.

-George--

-I didn't [inaudible] on the sign.

-Oh, yeah.

Fine.

Great.

That's--

[chattering]

-It's going to get hung up if you move it that way.

[chattering]

-Just move it in there.

It's going to get hung up.

I'm telling you.

-All right.

-Well, George.

This is your big night.

-Oh.

And we've got a full house.

-Yes.

We have.

-Oh.

-Well, George, break a leg.

-OK.

it both legs.

-Hey there, Stella, baby!

-Don't holler at me like that.

Hi Mitch.

-Catch.

-What?

-This meat.

[laughter]

-Where are you going?

-Bowling.

-Can I come watch?

-Sure.

-Blanche! [crying] Oh.

Blanche!

Blanche!

-Stella.

-[crying]

-Move.

Stella.

What are you looking at?

Stella.

Come on, baby, don't-- don't do-- Stella, come on.

Stella.

-The name of this game-- Seven-Card Stud.

[applause]

-No, no, really.

-Oh, Helene, you were spectacular.

Goodnight, dear.

-Oh, listen-- OK.

I'll see. you later.

I'm going to see you.

Helene!

-What did I do wrong?

Did I insult him or something?

-Oh, no.

No.

He does that after every performance.

The minute that curtain comes down, he clears out.

He's gone.

That's what we've been trying to tell you.

-What about Saturday?

Will he go to the cast party?

-Oh, no.

Harry never goes to parties-- never.

Never.

It--

MAN: Helene, you were terrific!

-Listen.

When that curtain comes down, that's

the last anybody's going to see of him until he turns up

for work on Monday.

-How long has he been this way?

-As long as I can remember.

-How sad.

-Good night, Helene.

-Thanks, Andy.

Goodnight.

-Thanks.

-Bye.

-Well, I'm sure glad when your club starts a new play.

-Why?

-The profits always jump.

-Oh, poor Harry.

-I saw you in the play last night.

Stanley, you were great!

You were great.

-You can come break my plates any time, Stanley.

-[laugh]

-Oh.

-Hello, Harry.

-Can I help you with something?

-Can you help me?

Um, uh, yes.

I was, um-- I'm looking for a potholder.

-There's a nice one.

I'll get it.

No, Harry-- um.

I'm really sorry about the other night-- asking you

about your mother.

Really.

I didn't know.

-It's OK.

-No, really.

I'm very sorry.

I-- I understand now why-- why you're so shy.

I-- you know, I'm-- I'm really-- I'm really a very-- ahh.

I'm really a very shy person too.

I mean, if, um-- if George hadn't asked me to audition,

I never would've met you.

And, I mean, you're-- you're really the person who's helped

me to overcome my fear.

-If tomorrow's performance goes anything like this,

I won't be able to show my face on the street.

-I don't know how the town will survive, Albert.

-What's all this stuff?

-Honey, it's Blanche's birthday.

-Honey, it's-- it's Blanche's birthday.

-Is she here?

-Well, she's in the bathroom.

-Soaking in a hot tub?

HELENE: I, um-- yeah.

I reckon so.

-The temperature's 100 degrees on the nose,

and she soaks in a hot tub.

HELENE: I reckon so.

-She says it cools her off.

-She says it cools her off for the evening.

-Ah.

-Oh.

[chattering]

-It was an off night.

Whatever.

-All right.

Nobody go home in 10 minutes [inaudible].

-Hi Dad.

-Hi, honey. ow you doing?

-All Harry here?

-Look, girls.

I don't think you should bother Harry today.

-Ohh!

[crashing noise]

-Harry!

Is everything all right, Harry?

-What's wrong with Harry?

-Nothing a good psychiatrist couldn't cure.

-Blanche! [crying] Blanche!

-Stella.

Stella.

Stella.

Oh, ba--

MAN: The name of this game is Seven-Card Stud.

-Harry, you guys were great!

-Oh, thank you.

-I have to go.

-Where?

-Home.

-Oh.

Wouldn't-- wouldn't you take me to the cast party?

-Not much on parties.

-Well then, um-- I'll let you go,

if you just promise me one thing.

-What's that?

-Will you promise you'll just stay here, just for a second?

I'm going to go run and get your present.

-Present?

-Yeah.

You promise?

-OK.

-You sure?

-OK.

-Harry, you were so wonderful.

I loved it.

-Harry, you really were Stanley tonight.

Real good.

-Harry.

-Sorry.

-You were both wonderful.

-Oh, Doris.

Thank you.

-Congratulations.

-Thanks.

-Oh, uh, no, no.

You have to open it please.

Wow.

Harry Nash.

Thanks.

-Um, the-- the marker's at my favorite scene.

-Uh huh.

-Don't you want to know what my favorite scene is?

-Sure.

-Good.

What's in a name?

That which we call a rose by any other name

would smell as sweet.

So Romeo would worry not, Romeo called--

retain that dear perfection which

he owes without that title.

Romeo, doff thy name and for thy name which is no part of thee,

take all myself.

Look what Romeo says.

You want to read what Romeo says?

-I take thee.

I take thee at thy word.

Call me but love, and I'll be new baptized.

Henceforth-- I never will be Romeo-- never.

-Well, what man art thou that thus bescreened in night,

so stumblest on my counsel?

-By a name, I know not how to tell thee who I am.

By name, dear saint, is hateful to myself

because it is an enemy to thee.

-My ears have yet not drunk 100 words of thy tongues uttering,

yet I know the sound.

Art thou not Romeo, and a Montague?

-Neither, fair saint, if either thee dislike.

-How came is thou hither, tell me.

And wherefore the orchard walls are high and hard to climb,

and the place, death, considering

who thou art, if any of my kinsmen find thee here.

-With love's light wings that I o'erperch these walls--

with love's light wings that I o'erperch these walls,

for stony limits cannot hold love out.

And what love can do that dares love attempt,

therefore thy kinsmen are no stop to me.

[laugh]

-[laugh]

-I've never seen such [inaudible] anybody in my life.

-They sure are creating a stir around here.

-This town could use some stirring.

-Here you go.

-Hey, [inaudible].

-Thank you.

-Hi [inaudible].

-Oh, I see Lydia's got you back working for a living, huh?

-Yeah.

-What happen, Harry quit?

-No.

He's taking inventory.

-Oh, good.

I want to talk to him about the new play.

-Harry?

-Hey, uh, how are the lovebirds, by the way?

-Oh, those two are floating around on a pink cloud.

-What else did you expect?

-Oh, hello.

-Oh.

Hi, Helene.

-Hi.

I was just in the neighborhood.

I thought maybe Harry might be around.

-Uh, Harry?

-Oh.

Hey.

-Hi.

-[laugh]

-Charming day.

Miss Fairfax.

-Pray, don't talk to me about the weather, Mr. Worthing.

Um, whenever people talk to me about the weather,

I'm quite certain they mean something else.

-They do-- mean something else.

-I thought so.

-Miss Fairfax, ever since I met you,

I've admired you more than any girl

I ever met since I met you.

-Yes.

I'm quite aware of that fact.

And my ideal has always been to love someone

with the name Ernest.

I mean, there's something in that name

that inspires absolute confidence.

-Do you mean you love me too?

Gwendolyn?

-Passionately, my own Ernest.

-But you don't mean to say that you couldn't love me

if my name wasn't Ernest.

-But your name is Ernest.

-Yes, I know.

It is.

But supposing it was something else.

Do you mean to say you couldn't love me then?

-But that's clearly metaphysical speculation.

-I must say, I-- I think there are

lots of other much nicer names.

Harry, for instance.

That's a charming name.

-Harry.

No, there's very little music in the name Harry, if any at all.

It doesn't thrill.

-I must get christened at once.

I mean, we must get married at once.

-Married, Mr. Worthing?

-Surely you know that I love you.

And you've led me to believe that you're not

absolutely indifferent to me.

-I adore you.

But you haven't proposed to me yet.

-Well, may I propose to you now?

-I think this is an admirable opportunity.

But in order to spare you any possible disappointment,

I think it only fair to tell you frankly, beforehand,

that I'm totally determined to accept you.

-Gwendolyn.

-Yes, Mr. Worthing?

Do you have something to say to me?

-Will you marry me?

-Of course I will, my darling.

In how long you have been in getting to it,

I don't think that you've have very much practice in how

to propose.

-I've never loved anyone in the world but you.

-I hope that after we marry, you'll

always look at me just like this-- especially in front

of other people.

[laughter]

How are you all?

Obviously not as happy as you two are.

[laughter]

-Well, George, you know, this week

I've been pursued by Mark Antony and romanced by Henry Higgins,

loved by Henry V, and I was just proposed to by Ernest Worthing.

-Oh!

-But don't you think I'm just about the luckiest girl

in town?

-Listen-- not only do I think so, but most of the, uh,

women in town think so too, might I say.

-Well, they had their chance.

-[laugh]

-Probably most of them couldn't stand the excitement.

-I don't think-- I don't know if you've heard or not,

but I've been asked to direct the next play.

-George, that's wonderful.

-Thank you.

I, uh-- I was just wondering if you two

might be available for the cast.

-Who are we this time?