Original subtitles

- Finn Sharkey, I start today.

Mr Mead. - Oh, my god.

This is your first warning. If I have to give you another,

I'll make sure you're thrown out of this school as well.

- This is basketball, it's not for short-arses.

- I'm quite good, maybe I can give you a go sometime.

- Congratulations, cos if you want this job it's yours. - Thank you.

- You fancy him, don't you? - No.

- I thought that you and I were friends.

- That was sort of the problem.

- It's Stephanie, but you can call me Steph.

- I'm Oliver. What do you say to a brandy, Stephanie?

- OK, make sure you get your work experience forms

signed at the END of your placements, right? OK.

Off you go, enjoy yourselves.

Finn, do you want to come with me? - Where are you going?

- Mr Sharkey didn't manage to get his parental consent form signed.

- I don't see why I should need their permission.

- Just means you'll have to spend another boring week at school with me, don't it?

- Couldn't bear to be without you, Miss.

- Finn! I thought you were supposed to get a place near me.

- I know. I messed up. Sorry.

You can always bunk off if you feel that bad about it.

- This place at the art centre took me ages. Why didn't your parents sort you out?

- It's fine. We've still got evenings and lunchtimes, yeah?

Come here.

- Wahey! - Get in there!

- THEY WHISTLE

Morning, girls. What can I get you?

- Sausage and egg sandwich, please.

Extra ketchup. Extra sausage. Extra egg. - Me too. - Me three.

- Hungover. - Porridge'd sort you out better.

Slow release energy. No carb crash.

- No, thank you. Lard, please.

- OK. - Good gig, though, weren't it?

- Do you often go to the Castle? - Yeah, to get away from you lot.

Clearly I need a better plan.

- White Noise are playing on the weekend, are you going?

- Not now I know you are. Get these down you and don't drink so much in future, yeah?

Roll up for your kick-start breakfast,

you can't start the day without fuel.

- I'm not really a breakfast person, thanks. - The most important meal of the day, Miss Mason.

You've got to keep your energy levels up. - I'm fine, I'll pass, thank you. All set for our meeting?

- I'm looking forward to it. Thought I'd bring our sous chef here along. Show him the business end of things.

- Very nice. - See you.

Jo, couldn't give us a hand, could you? - Yeah.

- Got it all in in one piece but

I doubt it'll be coming out that way.

- What have you got in here, Chris, an elephant?

- A few bits and pieces, my dad said, not the whole flaming house.

- Oh, has he roped you in to helping him move?

- Something like that, yeah.

- What have you got to be so excited about? - Oh, I dunno.

Just looking forward to tonight. - Why, what's happening tonight?

- Well, I've got the place to myself, haven't I?

Got some romantic DVDs, take-away, you don't have to go home.

- Sorry, I forgot about that.

- You sure you're all right about this?

I mean, I thought we'd talked about it.

- Erm, I just wasn't concentrating, that's all.

What time do you want me to come round?

- Erm, about nine? - OK, cool, see you.

- Morning. - Hello.

So, am I right in thinking we've just got the one issue to discuss?

The work experience kids? So how's it going? - It's all sorted.

We've just got one who hasn't managed to get himself a placement. - Who's that?

- Finn Sharkey. - Yeah, well, it's probably for the best.

If he can't take orders from us, I don't know how he'd cope in the real world.

- OK, so if he's got such a problem with authority, why don't we trust him with some here, hmm?

Show him teaching's not as easy as he thinks. - Yeah. I suppose.

- You volunteering?

- Me? - I can't think of anyone better.

He could shadow you for the week,

you know, learn what it's like to be a TA.

- Yeah, by the end of the week you could have your own little mini-me.

Mini-Mead.

- Are we sure he can be trusted?

- Well, don't you think it would do him good? Adam jumped at the chance of helping Josh when I asked him.

- I wonder why.

- OK, let's get on.

- HE SIGHS

- Oh, come on, he's not that bad, it'll be fine.

Anyway, you said you've got history with him.

- Yeah, bad history. He made my life a misery when I was an NQT.

- Yeah, but now you're a grown-up. You're more than a match for him, come on.

- Have you confused the adults' room with the playground, by any chance?

- It's all right, Grantly. He's doing work experience with me this week.

- That is some kind of a joke? - I'm afraid not, no.

- Going to have fun, aren't we, Chris?

- Shift! - Hard work more like.

Show you what it's like on the other side of the desk.

- You'll be hard pushed to condense a lifetime of misery into one week.

- Well, I would like a repeat prescription if I may because I've almost finished...

I'm very happy to pop in and talk about reducing the dosage when I pick up my repeat prescription.

I don't want to speak to the receptionist.

Ooh, I've always hated you.

Oh, well, thought I'd had a bad night till I saw you.

- I've hardly had any sleep.

- Is this the new boyfriend?

It's every night this week, isn't it? - And again tonight. He's taking me to Addison's.

- So, what's he like then?

- I don't want to talk about him in case, you know, I put a curse on it.

It's just that he... makes me feel so special.

- Ah, John was like that the first few years.

These days I'd be in competition with his favourite chair.

- Can't say I blame him.

- What are you doing in here? - Work experience. Learning to be a teacher, aren't I, sir?

- Right, first rule,

whatever is said in this staffroom,

stays in this staffroom, OK?

- Right. - Finn.

- Toodle pip!

- Right, Mr Sharkey, here's your timetable for the week.

Don't think this is going to be a holiday, far from it.

- No worries, Chris.

- Oh, I'm sure that neither of us are ecstatic about spending the week together. - No, I'm thrilled, sir.

- Let's get something sorted right now.

Oi, you three, stop messing and get inside.

I'm not going to be putting up with any of your crap today, you understand?

You might have had the run of me when I was an NQT but a lot has changed since then.

- You're the boss. - Once you've had a taste of being in charge yourself,

I doubt you'll go so hard on us in the future.

- Sounds like you've got it all sorted, sir.

- I suggest you follow my lead to begin with.

See, your smart back-chat might work in the playground but it takes a lot more than that to control a class.

The best trick is to assert your authority from the start. Show no weakness.

These Year Eights are a hard bunch to keep focused at the best of times,

but with a fellow pupil in the class...

Right, settle down and find your seats, please.

Er, I said settle down and find your seats, please.

Guys. - Oi, sit down!

Now!

- Yes, thank you, Finn.

Right, as you may have noticed we have a visitor with us today.

Mr Sharkey here is going to be acting as our Teaching Assistant for the week.

- Cool. - Now, he's here to learn, just like you, and I expect you to

show him the same level of respect and attention that you show me, OK?

THEY LAUGH

Here you are, Mr Sharkey, if you can hand these textbooks out, please.

- No probs.

Pass them on.

- Thank you, sir.

- No worries, young lady.

- Thanks.

Thanks, sir. - No probs, dude.

- New menu's a success already - the uptake of school lunches

has increased 10% and I'm pretty confident that we'll reach our target

of 70% across the school by the end of the year.

- That's excellent news. I knew you'd get results.

So how about the tuck shop? - Yeah, slower progress.

Seems the kids are quite happy with their wholemeal spag bol and grilled chicken,

but still want a sugar fix at break.

I mean, stuff like that is OK for a treat, but... - Make it a treat then.

Well, my mum, right, she always had chocolate and biscuits and stuff,

but I weren't never allowed just to help myself.

I had to earn it, doing chores and stuff. You could do that.

- The parents might have a few complaints if we get you all outside mowing the lawns.

- You said it was the lazy bloaters who ate chocolate.

Tell 'em they can't have it unless they exercise.

- What, stop skiving PE, have a cake?

Turn up at basketball. Bag of crisps?

- Yeah. Sorted. - That's a nice idea. But I think I've already got enough projects on the go.

- I think we should trial it, roll it out across the whole school.

Some of our worst offenders are the sixth form.

Skipping carbs and relying on chocolate for their energy.

- Well, I know better than to try and talk you out of anything, so let's give it a go.

- What you doing here? You finish early?

- Nah, skipped out, didn't I?

They wanted me to clean a toilet, I went to be a hairdresser not a bog washer.

- Well, it's not much better here.

- Ah, get real, Sam.

You've got no chance. - What?

- I'm telling you you're wasting your time, he's well out of your league.

- Y'all right, Sam.

I was hoping you could sort me out with some of that staff discount you was talking about.

- I can only give you 20% off, like I said. - Yeah.

- Shouldn't you two be at school? - Er, shouldn't you be at work experience?

- No, we've got a free period, innit.

We got an away match tonight and our kit's starting to look a bit old school.

I was hoping you could sort us out with something fresh.

- Look at these, mate, they're well mint.

- Yeah, gotta be well minted to afford 'em as well.

Can't afford nothing in this shop, man, even with the 20%.

- Well, there's some cheaper stuff down...if you want to...

- Nah, just leave it. Maybe next time, yeah?

- Maybe next time.

- Maybe next time, yeah.

You'll have to try harder than that to impress him.

- Yeah, volley ball, mate.

- Oi!

- What losers.

- I'm warning you, stop it, come on. Right, last chance.

- What? - Stop it.

- You're going to have to be faster than that.

- No. I'm warning you.

- Keep your wig on.

- See you later.

- SECURITY ALARM BEEPS

- Knew it. Come with me.

- I haven't done anything. - Open your bag then, yeah?

- It's OK, I've got this one.

(Run.)

- Go on then.

- I didn't do it. I didn't do nothing.

- Keep going, we can have them.

- Sir. - Yes.

- Mr Sharkey.

- Yes, young man. What is it I can help you with?

- I don't know how to do this one.

- Oh, yeah, they're a pain in the bum these.

D'you get it now?

- Is it true you got expelled from your last three schools?

- Denzil. Let them get on with their work please, Finn.

- Yeah, it is, I'm afraid.

Some people just didn't quite have what it takes to handle me,

did they, Mr Mead?

- That is enough, thank you.

- You see the thing is, boys, anyone can be given a position

of authority, but it doesn't mean that they're quite up to the job.

- Right, a word outside.

- So I see it as my job to push them a bit, you know, make sure they can hack it.

- I won't ask you again.

- Say, if enough of you were to stand up now and start banging on the desks, for instance...

- Right, get out of my classroom now.

All right, Denzil, sit down, please.

You as well. Sit down, I said.

Sit down now! All of you!

- Temper, temper.

- I thought you wanted to be treated like an adult.

That was immature and pathetic.

- You're the one who threw your dolly out. - Don't push me, Finn.

BELL RINGS

- Just asserting my authority, sir.

Like you said.

- They still on us? - Nah, they're long gone.

- I didn't even put anything in my bag. How come the alarm went off?

- I forgot to take the tag off.

- What? You put those in there? - You said that you wanted them.

- I didn't want you to nick 'em.

- I'm sorry, I was just trying to help.

What are we going to do? - Don't know, but we can't stay here for too long, there's cameras everywhere.

- I know somewhere we can go, come on.

- Look at that one. D'you get what I mean about chiaroscuro?

- It's beautiful.

- Look, the light and shade can tell us so much about the subject.

You know, their character, their story, their secrets.

It can give us so much depth of meaning.

- What you reading?

- It's photography.

- I'm going to go because I've got a stack of Year Nine homework to get through, so see you later.

- Hey, that one's a nice one.

Hey, we could do with borrowing this later. Get us in the mood.

- Is that all you ever think about?

- No, I was just...

because of the...

- Yeah, well, you're supposed to appreciate the images on a deeper level and let them speak to you.

- Yeah, I know.

This one's telling me that the photographer forgot to put enough lights on.

Calm down, I was just having a joke.

And since when have you been into arty farty photography stuff anyway?

- Since always.

There's obviously a lot of stuff you still don't know about me, Philip.

- FINN WHISTLES

- You're late. - Couple of minutes, yeah.

I had to tell 'em I had a doctor's appointment. - Good work. - You pleased to see me then?

- Finn, staffroom, please.

We've got marking to do. - You sure?

Thought you'd've given up by now, sir.

- Now, I said. - But, sir... - But, sir, nothing.

You're not even supposed to be here, are you? - I came to see Finn.

- Then you'll have to wait until he's free like any other visitor, aren't you?

After school, ideally.

- Come on, then.

- Wait here a sec, Finn.

You're well early. - Sorry, it's the only time I could get away from the office.

Look,

thanks for doing this for me, Chris.

- Yeah, well I can't see why you couldn't have done it yourself.

- I'm not exactly your mum's favourite person at the moment.

- No. Mine neither.

Park down there next to mine.

Got a job for you.

- What's all this? - New system. Snacks now available from the tuck shop by token only.

Bought by turning up to PE. All Josh's idea, the lad's a genius.

- First time for everything.

- At least it's something to stop you getting pumped up with chemicals

and messing about in class.

- Mr Fleet, what's going on? Why aren't the machines working?

- Because we have finally addressed your snacking obsession.

And if there's anything I can do...

- Healthy food only from now on, unless you're prepared to work for it. - What?

- Ah, you've got to be kidding me. We've just had double Budgen, we need sugar!

- Well, you'll have to prove you've done some exercise then, won't you?

And, FYI, exercising your jaws in the common room doesn't count.

- Food fascists.

Feeling any better?

- How come Fleet's not hungover? He was chucking 'em back last night.

- I know, dancing like a prat. Who moshes now? - Your dad!

- It's hardly appropriate, is it, girls?

- Well, don't just stand there, Finn, give us a hand.

- S'pose you've already heard your mother's side of the story.

- Course I have. She's really upset. She thought it was a trial separation.

- Yeah, well things haven't been right for the past five, ten years, y'know.

But I would've told you sooner but you know what your mother's like, she doesn't want you to worry.

- I'm a big boy. I think I can handle it.

# Racy lacy, boudoir beauty

# It's all that she can do

# A connoisseur of satin sheets... #

So who is she, then? This new woman.

She must be pretty special to throw away 30 years of marriage.

- She is.

You should meet her...

if you want to, that is.

- Well, I'll have to, eventually. See what all the fuss is about.

- Sooner than we thought, by the looks of it. - Hey.

How did you know I worked here, you old devil?

- I didn't.

- Oops.

- What? Do you two know each other?

- Something like that, yeah.

- Steph, this is...

This is my son, Chris.

Chris, this is Stephanie.

My girlfriend.

I honestly had no idea that she worked here.

- What and that makes it all right, does it?

- I'm sorry, I know this must have come as a bit of a shock to you, but I'm serious about this lady.

- You've seriously lost it. You've thrown Mum away for her?

I don't believe you, Dad.

- Chris! - Finn, come on.

- You might want to give him a minute.

He's under a lot of pressure

at the moment.

- Miss Mason. Hi.

We've spoken to the PE department and the coaches and they're both well up for Josh's new system.

- Oh, that's great.

Adam, can I just have a word with you?

- Sure.

- It's, er...

I'm just a little bit concerned because I hear that you've been

spending time with some of the Sixth Form girls outside of school?

- No. I mean, I've bumped into them. We're not bessie mates, if that's what you mean.

What are you implying?

- Well, just really that you need to be more careful

because it's not appropriate, Adam.

Surely you can see that?

- What, sharing the same building?

I go where I go, if they pitch up that's not my fault. I don't like where you're going with this.

- Some aren't old enough to be there. - That's the landlords' problem, not mine.

- But how can you expect the kids to respect you if as soon as you leave

this place you behave with no more maturity than they do?

- Is that why you never go out, never do anything remotely fun any more?

You're scared that a pupil might see and hate you for it?

You used to be a laugh, I mean, come on, what happened?

- It's called being professional, Adam. - Drop the superior act, Rachel.

I don't need a lecture. I know exactly where the line is and I haven't crossed it.

- Hang on, I am not lecturing you, I'm simply reminding you

that you're a member of staff. You need to set an example.

If you don't like that, maybe you should consider whether you're right for this school.

- You think there's only one approach with kids?

- I didn't say that. - Just because I'm not a carbon copy of you,

it does not make me unprofessional

and to be honest, Rachel,

I'm offended.

- So how long's your dad been dating Miss Haydock?

- Stay out of things that don't concern you, Finn.

- If you trade your wife in for the new model, you'd aim higher than that.

If you want the afternoon off for compassionate leave, sir, I'm happy to take your classes.

- You think you've got it all figured out. - Seem to be doing all right.

- That's cos you've had it easy so far, believe me.

The Year Eights might have been won over by your bad boy routine,

but I don't think the Year Twelves will be as easily impressed.

Let's see how you get on with a class full of grown-ups with a bit of respect for authority.

- Chris?

Look, I know it came as a bit of a shock and I'm sorry

that I put my size fives in it, but I want to make it up to you.

- Steph, stay out of my way and stay away from my dad too.

- You can't talk to her like that.

- Don't tell me what to do, I am not a kid.

- Then stop acting like one, will you?

You arrogant little toerag.

- Get off, get off me! - Come on then, come on.

- Come on, get off, get off.

Come on, then. - Come on, come on.

Come on. - Come on, then.

- All right. - Come on, then.

- Wow, brilliant(!)

High kicks, girly slaps.

- BELL RINGS

- Have you two got any idea how ridiculous you both look?

Well, clearly we've got a lot to talk about. So, Chris, why don't

you join your dad and me for dinner

tonight and we can try to get

to know each other better?

- I don't think so. I already know you well enough and him. I'll leave you both to it.

- Impressive.

Proper wrestling stuff, that, sir(!)

- Shut it, Sharkey.

- There you go, no people, no cameras.

There's no-one to bother us.

Perfect.

- So what are we supposed to do with ourselves now we're here?

- Same thing you always do when you bunk off.

Have a bit of fun.

So you're telling me you've never skived off before in your life?

- I'm the master, don't worry about me. - Then there shouldn't be a problem.

See if you're better than me.

That right there is Budgen's head and he's lost at the races and is in a proper bad mood.

- Miles off.

- Come on, if you think you're any better.

You'd better get shooting because he'll be asking for your overdue coursework soon.

That was rubbish!

- I know it's not perfect. I can understand

that your dad dating your colleague, you know, is a little bit Trisha.

But he completely overreacted.

Thank you. I mean, it was like such a spectacle, you know,

so ungentlemanly when all Oliver wants is to for us to make friends.

You know, Ruby, you could at least pretend to be interested.

You're just walking around like a zombie these days, why don't you try getting more sleep or something?

- Sorry, sorry.

What does Oliver think?

- Hey, Ros. - Oh, sorry, miss.

Just looking for somewhere quiet.

I'll get out of your way. - Is everything OK? - Yeah.

- Ros?

- It's just stupid relationship stuff,

that's all.

It's no biggie. - That's not stupid.

Relationships can be really hard work.

- It's just...

why do boys have to be so immature all the time?

- That's probably not

my area of expertise, if I'm honest.

But they do get better

as they get older, I promise.

- Must be so much easier just being with someone that understands you and knows what you're thinking.

You know, you being...

It's like women understand each other, don't they?

And they can, like, talk about emotions and feelings and...

- Yeah, but it can also be really frustrating when two people,

in the same relationship, are just as emotional as each other.

Whatever's going on with you and Philip, I'm sure together you can work it out.

Or, if you can't, then that's OK.

Cos either way, Ros, it's OK for you to have doubts

or to be confused about things,

cos that just the way life is, I'm afraid, and no relationship is ever, ever going to be as perfect

as we'd like it to be.

- Josh says Mason's been giving you a hard time.

- Did he, now? - It's bang out of order. Who does she think you are?

- You should complain about her bullying in the work place.

- She doesn't own you. - You're well better than she is, any day. - Er, it's not a popularity contest, girls.

- Good job. Mason never lets her hair down. She's got a stick up her backside. - Aleesha!

- Just cos her life's miserable, why's she got to be such a cow?

- That's enough. Would you speak about Miss Mason like that to other staff members?

- It's not like you're a teacher. You're cooler than the rest.

- Girls, I don't know where you got the impression that it's OK

to speak to me like that, but just to be clear, it isn't at all.

- All right, Mr Fleet. We're on your side.

- There aren't sides, Aleesha, unless it's the difference

between staff and pupils, adults and kids. - We're nearly 18. - Exactly. If I see you in a bar,

I can tell the landlord

that you're NEARLY old enough to drink there.

And watch who you're slagging off in future. Miss Mason'd never disrespect you like that.

- Sorry, sir. - Not your mistake, mate.

- Sir, what's he doing here?

- Mr Sharkey's here acting as my teaching assistant for the week.

- Are you having a laugh? He's a baby.

- Mr Sharkey? - You can't really expect us to take orders from that shrimp. - We should be the one's teaching him.

- Yeah, that's just the way it is, I'm afraid.

He's here to learn, just like you. And he's certainly not short of confidence, so...

I imagine that you lot have got plenty to teach each other.

He'll be leading this class and I'll be at the back.

Mr Sharkey, over to you, if you could start by collecting the homework assignments, please.

- No.

I'll get him first.

- Ah, winner!

You know, we shouldn't go back.

Like, go on the run.

It'd be so cool, just like Thelma and Louise. If Thelma was a bloke.

- Or Bonnie and Clyde?

- You'd look nice

in one of them hats. Proper gangsta.

- You're crazy, you, you know that? - I'm not as crazy as your face when that alarm went off.

- You tell anyone about me baggin' it,

I'll bang you out.

- I wouldn't ruin your bad man reputation.

- I wouldn't to ruin yours, telling everyone you're a tea-leaf.

- I don't think there's that much to ruin.

Sam Kelly the shoplifter ain't really any worse than Sam Kelly the scuzza.

- I wouldn't let what people think get to you, mate.

- Says the most popular lad in school.

- Yeah, but you've got your own thing going on, innit?

It's cool. I like it.

- I'm starving.

- Mum don't trust school dinners unless she's there cooking 'em for me, so...

Packed lunch.

- Lovely.

- I'll get that cheese one,

you can't take the cheese.

- What?

What?

- Cheers.

Assignment?

- What about it?

- Hand it over.

- SHE LAUGHS

- Do you really think I'm going to listen to you? - Yeah.

Cos I'm your teacher as well, so you need to do what I say.

- Well, I couldn't be bothered to do mine.

What are you going to do?

- Right, I'm sending you to the cooler.

- ALL: Ooh!

- And how will you do that, exactly?

- I'll drag you by your greasy hair if I have to.

- You can't talk to her like that.

- Try it, nappy rash.

- ALL: Nappy rash!

Who are you?! Who are you?! Who are you?!

- Sit back down!

- ALL: Who are you?! Who are you?! Who are you?!

- Shut up!

- All right, that's enough, Michaela, sit back down, please.

Enough! All of you, back in your chairs and assignments out.

Now, thank you.

Not so easy after all, is it?

- Whatever. - OK, Finn.

Lesson learned.

Why don't you go back to the staffroom, cool off and wait for me there.

- Problem? - I was just giving Finn a little lesson on responsibility.

Showing him teaching's not as easy as it looks. I let him lead the class.

Deep end and all that.

- Hang on a minute, let me get this straight.

You've just pitched him against a class of Year Twelves?

That's hardly fair odds, is it?

- He was showing off. He insisted that he could handle it.

- So, what?

You let a bunch of his peers prove him wrong?

Chris, when are you going to step up?

You're the one that needs to help him, not a bunch of surly sixth formers.

You up for round two?

- Er, Sam, I think we should just get back.

Come on, Sam. It'll only be a little bit of hassle, nothing massive.

Sam, dude. Man up.

- Will your mum be angry?

- I suppose so, she'll get over it.

Bark's worse than her bite, innit?

- The same, my mum'll probably just rant on for a bit and then she'll make a joke. - Nice one.

- She's going to think I'm going the same way as our Earl, though.

- Sam, there's a bit of a difference between bagging someone's shorts and...

you know, what he did.

- But she blames herself. She thinks she's a bad mum.

Sorry. - Do you want me to get my mum to have a word? Make sure your mum's OK?

- No, she'll be fine,

she's all right with the drinking and stuff, it's just...

I'm supposed to make sure me and Denzil don't do anything wrong to make her feel bad again.

- I reckon your mum's got it the wrong way round. You can't be carrying all that. It's not fair.

- My mum loves me and that, she tries her best, it's just...

we all take care of each other.

- MOBILE RINGS

- It's Paul.

Miss Mason's had a call from the shop.

So I think we'd better go.

- I know you're trying to help, Kim, but I could do without it.

I've got a lot on my plate at the minute, it's been a bit of a bad day.

- Most of our kids have bad days, Finn included.

We don't allow them to use it as an excuse, so why should they from us?

You've got to show them respect. Positive reinforcement wouldn't go amiss.

- That works with some. With Finn, it's like banging your head against a brick wall.

Look, trust me, I know what I'm doing.

Finn.

You little...

- Chris! - What've you done that for?

- I've been expressing myself.

- Look at the state of it!

- A definite improvement.

Isn't it pretty? - Stop that!

- I don't know what you're trying to prove, but...

- What's up, sir?

Shown you up in front of your mates?

Embarrassed you, have I?

- To the cooler.

- How awful for you. - To the cooler, Finn!

Chris... - I'm dealing with it!

- Hi...

erm, Josh said that you'd be here.

Erm...

I wanted to apologise for earlier.

I just heard the girls giggling about you...

..and it all came out wrong.

You know, I would have raised the issue with anyone else.

I know you wouldn't want me to give you any special treatment.

- I'd take special treatment over dragon lady, after my last tongue-lashing.

- Can you actually ever be serious?

- Rachel, I was...

I was actually going to come and find you.

I think you had a point, some of the kids might not have known where they stood.

And I do need to keep more of a distance.

- Oh, what's brought this on?

- When I'm wrong, I admit it.

I won't apologise for what I said about your work-life balance.

You can't be a teacher 24/7.

You need to let your hair down sometimes.

I mean, tell me, when was the last time you had some fun?

- Fun?

OK, what kind of fun do you mean?

- Any kind of fun! Out of school fun. Evenings. Weekends.

Point proven.

Look, I just...

..care about you.

I think you need to leave Miss Mason at work occasionally and just be the old Rachel again.

I really liked her. A lot.

- Get in.

You are a little sod, do you know that?

I thought if we gave you some responsibility today

and treated you like an adult... - What, like you are? - You what?

- Daddy doesn't love Mummy, so you lose it. I thought you were going to start crying.

- That is enough, Finn.

- Don't blame me cos your dad's riding the school bike.

Your mum must be a right minger if he dumped her for Miss Haydock.

- That is enough! - You going to hit me?

Or are you just going to go

and get me expelled cos you don't know what to do with me?

Just like last time.

- Dealt with it? - That boy is a nightmare.

He's unteachable, the little sod knows just what buttons to push. I hate him.

I know.

No teacher should feel that.

But I actually hate him.

- No, you hate that he knows how to get to you.

And that you've never known how to deal with him.

- He always seems to have one over on me.

- Maybe you need to try a different approach? - Well, I thought I had today.

Maybe I shouldn't have passed the buck, yeah?

- Chris, look, this school is full of challenging pupils.

Yeah? Finn is not the last one you're going to come across.

- I'm going to have to deal with this, aren't I?

- What are you doing here? - Got your text, didn't I?

- I never said you should come.

- So?

I'd rather be with you.

Thought you might need... - Well, I don't, OK?!

- So what they going to do?

They going to chuck you out? - Amy, just go away, yeah?!

Look, no offence, I just don't want anyone around right now.

- Finn. Mr Mead wants to have a chat with you. Do you want to come with me?

- Look, I didn't mean to be such a prat earlier.

I'm sorry. Friends?

Cool.

So what DVD do you fancy tonight?

- Actually... - We can skip the film, if you'd rather,

I mean, I don't mind, we can just have a nice romantic dinner and...

- No, I mean... Karla and I were thinking that we really need to catch up on some studying tonight.

- No, we weren't.

- No, we didn't say tonight, but seeing as you're here, we might as well, it makes sense.

All three of us could go round to your house.

You said it were free. And we could discuss Cambridge entry papers.

- But we, sort of, had plans tonight. - I know.

I can't exactly relax with all this stuff in my head. Do you mind?

It could be fun.

- Yeah, sure.

- Mason got you on detention, then?

- I shouldn't have made you take that class by yourself, Finn.

- I could've handled it.

- Yeah, well, nevertheless, I let the situation go too far.

I'm your teacher, I'm supposed to be protecting you, not making you feel vulnerable.

I'm sorry.

But as part of that protection,

I get to tell you what to do,

and you might not like that, but the fact is you have to deal with it.

And I have to deal with you.

I can't keep leaving you for other people to sort out

and I don't know what it is that I am supposed to say or do to get through to you, Finn.

But I played it wrong today.

I messed up. I might again.

The chances are, I probably will.

But we are not going to be chucking you out,

so if this anti-authority thing you've got going is to get yourself excluded,

then you might as well drop it right now.

You can scoff and you can kick off as much as you like,

but I am as stubborn as anything and you won't be getting rid of me.

So, I'm here to help you with the first part of your punishment.

Get scrubbing.

This stuff's a nightmare to get off.

- You still fight like a girl.

- Yeah, seems I'm not great at being told how things are going to be, either.

- Might be something you want to work on, sir.

- Less chat, more elbow grease.

- Right...

Would someone like to explain to me what on earth has been going on, today?

Well?!

- I'm sorry, Miss, it was... - It was me that nicked the shorts, Miss.

Just thought it'd be a bit of a laugh, really.

Wind Sam up.

I was always going to take them back,

I just didn't realise she'd chase after me and hunt me down.

- Is that right, Sam?

Bolton, I'm so disappointed,

I really thought that you'd outgrown

all this behaviour.

Shoplifting, come on!

You should have been in school.

- Soz, miss.

- I've persuaded the shop not to press charges,

on the understanding that you work there for free for the next four Saturdays.

But that doesn't change the damage you've done

to this school's reputation and to your own.

Well, you can expect at least

a month's detention for this and I will be talking to your mum when she gets back.

Come on, both of you. Let's get you out of here.

Sam, wait.

Can I trust you not to get involved

in anything like this again?

Can I?

Go on.

- Why did you take the blame like that?

- It's nothing big, don't worry about it.

I'd rather people think I'm a cheapskate shoplifter than a wuss who legs it,

first sound of an alarm, innit? Got a reputation to keep.

- Yeah, well, I didn't think you'd do that for me.

- There he is.

The hard man himself, Bolton Smiler!

- Too right, mate. I've just been dealing with the feds, you know.

- Didn't think you two would be here. Thought you might have eloped off together. - What, no chance, mate.

Well, tonight's the night, the big dinner with Meads junior and senior.

I'm a bit nervous, actually.

Christopher's made it clear how he feels, so I just hope he does turn up

because Oliver could do with the support. I'm hardly a scarlet woman.

- Will you stop going on

and on about your ruddy fancy man?!

You know, all day long you have been banging on

about your love life. I pretend to listen because I'm your friend,

but, you know, you haven't got a clue what's going on for me and you don't care!

- Well, excuse me for talking about my life for once, after listening

to you wanging on about your boring problems for God knows how long.

- Sorry. Sorry, Steph.

It's just me and John.

It's nothing. It's fine. - You sure?

- Absolutely, yeah, and I'd better get off, because we're having a talk.

- OK, good luck.

And you know I am always here for you,

there's always a bottle of wine or seven chez moi. - Thank you.

- You waited?

Can't believe you stayed.

Come here.

- So what happened with Mead?

- He's full of crap.

But he'll get his.

Come on.

- # I think you want to come over, yeah

# I heard it through the grapevine

# Are you drunk or you sober?

# Think about it, doesn't matter

# And if it makes you feel good then I say do it

# I don't know what you're waiting for... #

- What is this?

- I said I'd get you a life away from school. Ta da!

- I hate to rain on your parade, how is this away from school?

- I don't want to upset your progress by pushing you too hard, too fast.

Baby steps. First, we get you rebelling at school. We'll handle the big, wide world later.

- Hmm, popcorn?

- We can't watch a film without popcorn. Do you know nothing?

Tonight's screening.. - Rita, Sue And Bob Too!

- Remember, we sneaked in to see it?

- You nearly forgot your date of birth.

- You nearly got us kicked out.

- You ate all the popcorn.

- Will my portly past never be forgotten?

Just give it a chance, Rach.

Just give it a chance.

- Lettuce Hands, they used to call our Chris.

Couldn't even bruise a peach.

The shame of it. A voluntary boxing club, he even managed to get thrown out.

- He showed an impressive right hook with our executive head last term.

Floored him. You would have been so proud.

Look, Oliver, I'm sure he'll come round, you know, given time.

- I doubt it. He's pretty stubborn.

I'm not about to let him ruin this for us.

- That's my chair, is it?

- Course it is, son, yeah. Take a pew.

- Look. Can I just, erm...

..apologise for what I said today.

To both of you.

Turns out, I didn't handle things as well as I could have done and I'm sorry.

- Yeah.

Me too.

If you felt like I've handled things badly or insensitively...

Sorry.

- Right, well, that's that out of the way.

Let's have a top-up.

Shall I be mother?

- That's the one.

- How'd you know he'd be here?

- Heard them talking about it earlier.

- Are you sure this is a good idea, Finn?

Why don't you just forget about it?

- I've got to show him, Amy.

I thought you understood that.

I thought you got me.

- How can I, if you never let me know what you're really thinking?

We're supposed to be soulmates,

but you never talk to me about anything proper.

You just treat me like one of them.

Don't you trust me, Finn?

- Yeah, course, I do.

- Talk to me, then. What is it about Mead that's got to you?

- He's full of crap.

He's all "we can work through this".

It's all crap.

He treats me like I'm this little project.

I've got to show him.

- OK.

Then let's show him.

I won't let you down, Finn.

I love you.

- CAR ALARM

- Ha! One more time.

Ames, you're the best! Let's go!

- What?

What? - Are your moves from the '80s as well?

- I don't believe it. I'm being marked on my seduction technique.

- Have you not learned any new tricks?

- No.

- Now, listen, could madame be so impertinent as to enquire

whether monsieur would join her back at hers for a night cap, perchance?

- Absolutely, not! Taxi! J'aime le taxi. Madame.

- Steph! Sorry.

- Ruby, what are you doing here?

What's happened?

- It didn't really work out as I'd planned with John.

And he's kicked me out.

I didn't want to spoil your night, but I didn't know what else to do.

- Come here.

Well, I suppose you'd better come back to mine.

- I'll, er... Chris, do you mind if I jump in with you?

- Yeah, course.

MOUTHS: - Sorry.

- Lucky escape, come on. - What?

- I don't believe this.

Finn!

Finn!

- I'll never leave you, Finn.

- Morning all, Rachel's away today, so I'm picking up the reins.

- I think he's treating you like a mate.

- I know my own son, Kim, thank you.

- It's time to fly, babes.

- I'm looking forward to showing you what we're all about.

- I'm aware of the headlines.

This school keeps the Rochdale Observer in business.

- Are you stoned? - I smoked something at break.

- I need to see the real Waterloo Road.

- You need to be able to trust us. - I spiked his dinner.

- Spiked a teacher?! - It'll be kicking in now.

- Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk