All language subtitles for The Big Fat Quiz Of The Year 2020 [720p].eng

This programme contains
strong language and adult humour

Hello, and welcome to
The Big Fat Quiz of 2020.

It's been such a fantastic year.

I know you're really excited
to re-live it.

Even Covid couldn't kill this show,
which is surprising

because being big and fat puts us at
a much higher risk.

We're allowed to make
the show this evening

because we're following Covid
guidelines, and because

if we didn't make this show,
you'd have to talk to your family.

This is public service broadcasting.

Let's meet tonight's teams.

She's attractive,
charismatic and fashionable,

and he's sitting next to her -
it's Maya Jama and David Mitchell.

We had to separate them by two
metres,

not just because of the
Covid restrictions -

also the sexual chemistry.

Rrreeow!

The next team is like when people
try cinnamon in a shepherd's pie -

it shouldn't work...
and it probably won't.

It's Stacey Solomon
and James Acaster.

Which one of us is cinnamon and
which one's the shepherd's pie?

Erm, everyone likes you
so you're the shepherd's pie.

All right, then.

Whereas... whereas you're sweet and
sexy.

I'm happy either way with this.

Finally, one's famous for hosting
Travel Man and a bit weird,

and the other's famous for hosting
Travel Man and a bit weird.

There's clearly been some sort of
mix up,

but we're going to go with it -
it's Richard Ayoade and Joe Lycett.

I agree, I agree.

Weird? You weirdo. You're so weird.
Weird?

I dispute this.

He said, weirdly. OK.

David, Maya, how was your lockdown?

It's a bit of a pisser,
isn't it, the pandemic?

The global pandemic.
It's a bit of a pisser.

Yeah, who knew? It was a bit of a
pisser, wasn't it? Yeah.

James, Stacey, how was your
lockdown?

Good. Yeah. We did it together.

Yeah, we went into lockdown together

and we've been revising
all year for this.

We got ourselves a tent.

With the kids. With the kids!

With the kids... and my partner.

Yep. LAUGHTER

That can make things
a little bit awkward,

but not when you're rolling with
cinnamon here. Yeah.

When you're rolling with old
Cinnamon Knowledge - which is

what I call myself in the quiz
world - it's fine.

And how was your lockdown?

I've had a fine lockdown, Jimmy.

Fine. It's been all right.

I quite like... It's not been much
different for me, of course.

Team names.
David and Maya, what have you got?

We haven't thought of one
so our team name is undecided.

So... Straight to the point.
..our team name is Undecided.

OK, so Undecided.

James and Stacey,
what have you got as a team name?

Cinnamon Knowledge
and the Shepherd's Quizzer.

Shepherd's Quiz.

How long were you
revising for this moment?

A whole year!

A year and, if I'm honest,

we were in that tent before there
was even a lockdown announcement.

You can over-revise.

Joe, Richard,
have you got a team name?

Richard had a lovely thought.

What about Lycett To Thrill?

That's good. Lycett to Thrill it is.

Right, let's get on with the show.

Our first round is
all about the year's top stories.

Covid-19 dominated the headlines.

The bad news was millions infected,
families divided,

the economy destroyed.

The good news - no more queues at
the Post Office!

Clap for Carers was
a way for the UK to

show their appreciation for the NHS.

I was very involved with
Clap for Carers -

I slept with two nurses,
caught it off the first one,

gave it to the second.

Donald Trump had a hell of a year.

What's next for Trump?

Well, judging by his size and shape,
I imagine wave two will get him.

In September, Trump's tax returns
were made public.

Turns out the multi-millionaire
only paid $750 in tax.

I don't know about you,
but I'm warming to the guy.

Right, let's get started.
I've got some questions for you.

Yes! Woo! Straight in. Oh, yeah.

In January... Woo!

In January, Prince Harry
and Meghan Markle announced plans to

step back from royal duties
and move to America.

A term was coined to sum up the
event

and added to the
Collins English Dictionary.

What was it?

"Ditch the royals"?

Oh, no, I know what it was.

I believe in you. I've got no idea.

Shall I take this one? Cos I think I
know what it is. OK, question two.

Next, it's over to the nation's
favourite PE teacher -

it's Joe Wicks, everyone.

Hi, Jimmy.

I loved keeping the nation fit and
healthy during lockdown this year.

Of course, one of the other ways to
keep healthy was to remember

the Government's Covid
safety slogans.

The first was, "Stay at home,
protect the NHS, save lives."

The second was, "Stay alert,
control the virus, save lives."

But the third in September was just
three simple words.

What were they?

OK, so the first slogan was,

"Stay at home, protect the NHS, save
lives."

The second was, "Stay alert,
control the virus, save lives."

What was the third Government
slogan?

"Catch it, bin it, kill it."

Question number three.

During a White House coronavirus
briefing,

Donald Trump suggested two new
Covid treatments.

What were his treatment suggestions?

Two new treatment suggestions from
Donald Trump.

You get a point for each one.

What does he suggest you do?

Global pandemic. He thought,
"I'm taking this seriously.

"I'll tell people what they should
do." Great.

OK, question number four.

It wouldn't The Big Fat Quiz
of the Year without

an appearance from the children
of Mitchell Brook Primary School.

Let's see what they have for us this
year.

Happy birthday, Mum.

Maybe we should drive back home.

What about your eyes?

They have been sore.

Let's test them by
doing a short drive.

Yay, to the car!

I feel a bit sick.

Let's sit down.

Happy Easter to you.

I recognise you.

Let's drive back.

I need a wee.

Ugh.

Hello, there.

Lovely day for it!

Let's go back to London tomorrow.

Yay!

Always adorable.

So that was the children of Mitchell
Brook Primary School, of course

doing Dominic Cummings' visit to
Barnard Castle during the lockdown.

Oh, he's just told us. Ugh.

I thought that was going to
be the answer. Sorry.

That's not the answer!
We thought we had it.

We were, like... Yeah.

So the related question is,

when caught, Cummings defended
his actions with this statement...

Just fill in the blanks.

Oh, he thinks he did quite well.

Sorry, Maya,
what are you snacking on?

It's part one of the show.

Yeah, I know, there's a lot of ham
and cheese down here.

There's a lot of ham and cheese?

Well, Peperami, to be precise.

Peperami?! Yeah, and salami.

Woo!

That's quite a range.

Wow, you got a full-on cheese board!

It's Christmas, innit?

Final question in this first round.

I'm going to read you
an excerpt from a letter that hit

the news back in September.

All I want to know is, who was
it from and who was it to?

Here's the letter.

"Like the brief time we had together
a year ago in Singapore...

"Such a precious memory that
I have in my unwavering

"respect for you will provide
impetus for me to take my steps

"when we walk towards each other
again some day in the future."

Who was that letter from
and who was it to?

I've got no idea. I think it...

I need both for the point.

You've got both.

Oh, yeah. Confidence, James.
Confidence.

So, first set of answers for you.

I asked you, what term was coined
to describe Harry

and Meghan moving to America?

Did you get this? You did, of
course. Megxit. Megxit.

Yes, cos it sounds like "Brexit".

Stacey, Megxit or?

I said Megxit and...

I thought it might be Brarry.

Brarry.

Yes - "Brexit" and "Harry" together.

So we agreed to disagree,

but we went with Megxit first.

I think you get a point there,
really.

And you got this David, Maya?

Yeah. Yeah. We've spelt it with a Z

instead though, which is more

futuristic and dynamic

than the ancient X.

Cowabunga, dude.

Thank you.

Well done. We're big in the game.

We talk like that.
Yeah, you're massive in the game.

We're down with the kids. Huge.
Sure. Yeah.

All right, points all round there.

Joe Wicks asked you if you knew what

the Government's third Covid slogan
was. Have you got it?

Yeah.

"Kiss, cuddle, shag."

I was dubious about this answer.

What did you think it might be?

Like, don't kiss, don't cuddle

and definitely don't shag.

Well, the tent said differently.

OK, so, "Kiss, cuddle, shag."

It's not exactly what their slogan
was. Joe, Richard?

"Stop, collaborate and listen."

And, Maya?

"Hands, face, space..." Yeah.

..is what we put in.

You are absolutely right.

It was, "Hands, face, space."

Ah.

Of course, by the time this goes
out, that will have changed to,

"We're clueless, you're fucked."

I thought they should have gone
with, "Covid-19, Matt Hancock nil."

Points, no points, no points.

I asked you if you knew what
treatments Trump

suggested for Covid-19.

Richard?

Disinfectant, Anusol,

bath scum, your own tears and juice.

OK. I mean, you've really covered
the gambit there.

Yup.

Anusol, it's for piles, isn't it?

Yeah. When I get home tonight,

there's going to be a crate of
Anusol waiting for me from

my sponsor, so my work's done.

Yeah.

Worth rocking up for another year.

OK, so you get one point there,
Joe and Richard, for disinfectant.

James and Stacey, we're talking
about what President Trump

suggested as a treatment for
Covid-19. What did you put?

We thought he wanted people to
inject bleach and live forever.

You get one point. Inject bleach.

He definitely suggested it.

Live forever was not
one of his suggestions,

although it was as crazy as that.

Did you get this, David?

We've put a range of things.

We've put drinking Dettol,

injecting mini doctors

and not touching old people.

OK, so a point for everyone.

You didn't get the other thing.

Let's go over to the
Commander-in-chief himself.

Supposing we hit the body with
a tremendous...

..whether it's ultraviolet or
just very powerful light.

And then I said, supposing you
brought the light inside the body,

which you can do, either through
the skin or in some other way.

Right, and then I see the
disinfectant, which knocks it out

in a minute, one minute,
and is there a way

we can do something like that
by injection inside

or almost a cleaning?

Cos you see it gets in the lungs and
it does a tremendous number

in the lungs so it would be
interesting to check that.

"A tremendous number on the lungs."

Yeah, I mean, he's wrong.

You can't get rid of Covid with
disinfectant.

He isn't wrong, but the trouble is
if you inject disinfectant,

you also get rid of the other
organism involved - the human being.

Similarly, you can treat Covid

with high explosives very, very
effectively,

but the trouble with high explosives
is it does a tremendous number

on the human as well. Yeah.

I think as soon as he became
President, I just didn't

really pay attention to any of it
any more

cos I thought there's no-one
actually taking this seriously

if you're going to vote him,

so I'm not going to take it
seriously any more either.

We've only got to get through to
sort of mid-Jan.

We're going to be fine.

He broke his foot though, Biden,
playing with his dog.

Stay still, old man!

That's going to look great at the
inauguration, isn't it?

He'll probably have a drip as well.

"Please welcome America's first
very brittle President."

He is a bit old, isn't he?

He's not that old, is he?

He is a bit old. He is old.

How old is he? He's only 78. 78.

I mean, how old are you, Jimmy?

Well, Stacey, it's an
interesting question -

this hair's barely six months.

OK, you saw the children of Mitchell
Brook Primary School act out

Dominic Cummings'
visit to Barnard Castle.

I wanted you to fill in the blanks.

It was...

What do you think?

"Properly and nicely."

I mean you're not far off in terms
of the meaning. Yeah.

..but incorrect. Oh. Ugh.
What did you go for, James?

"Like cinnamon and shepherd's pie."

Well, now you sound
like a crime-fighting duo.

Yeah. Imagine if Cummings joined our
ranks.

Ah. Oh... Hm.

Nah, he'd really bring us down,
I think.

Yeah, but he'd be like the
wild card on the force.

Doesn't play by the rules and we
always have to apologise for him.

Or not apologise and throw it
back in the public's face.

What did you go for, David, Maya?

I put, "Like the government should."

Yeah. "I believe that..."
Yeah, "Like the Government should."

And I put "dishonestly".

No-one got it right. It was...

I feel that he took the same
approach as Shaggy, which is

just to say, "It wasn't me,
and I didn't do it,"

and I think that's valid and, in a
certain sense, I've warmed to him.

♪ I tested my eyes on the sofa

♪ It wasn't me. ♪

It was annoying. I went there
on the same day I went to get

my eyes tested, Barnard Castle.

There was loads of people
had the same idea.

We had to queue up.

We were all queuing behind him
and were like,

"Come on, come on, Cummings!
There's only one eye chart.

"We've all got to use it!

"Why did they put it on the side
of the castle anyway?"

Finally in this round,

I wanted to know who wrote that
moving letter I read to you.

Who do you think it was from?
Who do you think it was to?

Quite sort of... Quite sentimental.

What did you think, James, Stacey?

It was actually from me to James.

And you can't prove that
didn't happen.

Those were your exact words?

Exact words on day two of being
together, practising for this quiz.

And I was embarrassed cos
my letter was a lot shorter.

Oh, it was rubbish. Mine just said,
"Hanoi good, you cool."

That's all it said.

OK, no points. Joe, Richard?

We couldn't agree.

I've said that it was between
Eamonn Holmes and Linda Barker.

No. I mean... No.

And what did you think, Richard?

Luke Goss to Matt Goss.

Or vice versa.

Did you get this, David, please?

We might have done.

We weren't sure if it was Trump to
Kim Jong-un or the other way around.

Hm.

It was... Yeah, Kim Jong-un to
President Trump.

You get the point. Ah.

So, at the end of the first round,
the scores are

Joe and Richard have two points,

Stacey and James have two points.

In the lead, David and Maya,
with four points.

Time for a quick circuit breaker
now, but come back in a minute

for our second wave.

Welcome back to The Big Fat Quiz
of the Year.

Our next round is all about TV
and film from 2020.

ITV's Quiz told
the story of Charles Ingram,

the quiz show contestant who
coughed his way to a million pounds.

Of course, you'd never get away
with it these days.

If someone in the audience
coughed that much now,

the whole studio would be
sent into quarantine.

This year's I'm A Celebrity
was held in Wales.

The contestants had to endure
foul smelling,

unsanitary conditions, awful food
and disgusting creepy-crawlies...

..then they left the hotel in
Swansea and headed to location.

Normal People was
a huge hit this year

but many found the sex
scenes too graphic.

A little tip for those people -
avoid the internet.

Before we get onto the questions,

let's remind ourselves of some
of the highlights in TV this year.

Good evening. Erm, let's get
straight to it.

♪ Let's go

♪ Cause I-I-I'm
in the stars tonight

♪ So watch me bring the fire...♪

I never start the drama.
I just finish it.

No!

And that looks quite normal,
doesn't it?

West.

Hit.

♪ I'ma light it up like dynamite...♪

Ooh!

♪ Whoa oh oh

♪ Dy-na-na-na...♪

Fire, John! Oh, thank you.

Thank you.

♪ ..na-na-na, na-na...♪

Do not go in that house. Over.

♪ ..with a little funk and soul

♪ So I'ma light it up like dynamite,
whoa oh oh

♪ Light it up like dynamite,
whoa oh oh. ♪

Oh. Hold me.

Good is coming. It has to.

All right, TV and film questions.

It's over to
Better Call Saul's Bob Odenkirk.

Hello, Jimmy.

In my latest film,
Nobody, I play Hutch Mansell,

a brow-beaten family man who gets
thrust into the spotlight.

One name that got thrust into the
spotlight this year was Sharon.

It started trending on Twitter
in January, after actress Amanda

Henderson appeared on Celebrity
Mastermind. But can you tell me why?

Ah.

So Amanda Henderson
went on Celebrity Mastermind

and... You know it. ..the name
Sharon trended on Twitter. Why?

There's an obvious answer and
she panicked and shouted Sharon.

Question two in this round
and we're onto film.

During his acceptance
speech for the Oscars

for Best Director, Parasite
director Bong Joon-ho

asked if the Academy would allow him
to do something with his Oscar.

What did he want to do
with his Oscar?

Do you know, I think I know
this one.

He wanted to...

He's got my mum's
hair from 1984, which is nice.

Oh, was that it? Yeah.

Question number three.

It's over to
Tiger King's Carole Baskin.

Hello, Jimmy.

It seems strange to open with that

since my trademark greeting has been
made famous the world around

since Netflix Tiger King
launched back in March.

Can your teams remember
what my greeting was?

OK, so what was her sort of
trademark greeting?

I don't know it,
but it's not a fault of memory.

I just haven't engaged with it.

You haven't engaged with Tiger King?
No. I'd recommend it.

You learn a lot of interesting
things watching Tiger King.

You learn that, like,
an animal sanctuary

is remarkably similar to a zoo,
it's just got different signage.

OK. Just animals in cages.

I feel I've learned
that by you telling me.

OK. Question four.

These are all audience
reviews for a film.

I just want you to tell me
what film.

"The cinema equivalent of having
your teeth pulled." Ah.

"It was
so loud that it hurt our ears...

Oh. Some people are horrible,
aren't they?

Some people are horrible,
aren't they, yeah.

What a horrible thing to
say about someone's film.

Yeah.

I'd love a bang bang boom
film. Yeah.

You love a bang bang boom boom. We
love bang bang boom boom films on this...

Bang bang, boom boom, shoot shoot. You
did, but don't tell her husband! LAUGHTER

He knows, he's been in the tent
with me. He knows what I like.

Bang bang, boom boom. Yeah, he knows
what I watch before I go to bed.

Don't forget, shoot too!

Bang bang, boom boom and then shoot
shoot at the end, obviously.

It has to be said,
anyone who goes to a film

thinking there's no point going

if it isn't better than Back to the
Future, they might as well give up

on cinema because Back to the Future
is essentially the best film ever.

Next it's over to Laura Whitmore,
who's got a question for you.

How are you, Jimmy? How are you?

So 2020 was the year to stay at home
and watch loads of telly.

I watched all of it, all of the telly,
and I want you to cast your mind back

if you can to September, when
Donald Fear became the first person

since 2006 to do something
quite big on telly.

What was it?

Somebody needs to buy her
a mouse mat.

She's currently using
the base of a lamp with "love"

written on it, which I've got
an issue with anyway. You're right.

But that's her mouse mat.

So the man called Donald Fear
was the first person to do

something on television since 2006.
What was it?

There we go.

Done. OK.

Bob Odenkirk wanted to know why
Amanda Henderson's appearance

on Celebrity Mastermind caused the
word "Sharon" to trend on Twitter.

What did you get?
It's a lovely name.

Sharon? It's a lovely name, because
names go out of fashion,

so we thought maybe Sharon had gone
out of fashion for a while

and then they heard the name Sharon
and everyone was, like, do

you know what, Sharon is such a nice
name, we don't say it often enough.

OK. Well, I can tell you you haven't
won the straw despite clutching

at straws. LAUGHTER

OK, Joe and Richard,
what did you put?

Yes. She said Sharon...

..instead of Greta Thunberg.

And what have you got, Maya?

Go on, honey. What does that say?
I can't actually read it.

She thought it was Boris
Johnson's new girlfriend. LAUGHTER

Well, I can tell you, that's
incorrect, that's incorrect.

Let's have a look.

The 2019 book entitled No One
Is Too Small to Make a Difference is

a collection of speeches made by a
Swedish climate change activist.

What's her name?

Sharon.

Greta Thunberg. LAUGHTER

She mistakenly identified
Greta Thunberg as Sharon and,

in response, Greta changed her name
to Sharon on social media.

Next, I asked you
if you knew what Parasite director,

Bong Joon-ho,
wanted to do with his Academy Award.

Did you get it? Possibly.

Come on, Richard.

Texas chainsaw it
and share it among his crew.

Texas chainsaw it and share it.

Yeah.

Exactly the right answer.
Thank you. OK.

What did you... James, Stacey?

James thought
he might have wanted to eat it...

..so we did write that, but I also
wanted to say that possibly

he wanted to share it with
the other nominees.

He wanted to chop it up
and share it, basically. Yeah.

That's what we kind of, we thought
it was similar. Similar thinking.

Yeah. And then you've written
something sideways,

I feel like someone's taken over
the writing on this.

That says put it in a pickle jar...

..because preservation is key.

Yes, that's it.

He wanted to put it in a pickle jar.

It is not the case.

He wanted to chop it up
and share it.

Points, points, no points.

I feel the Texas chainsaw's quite
an important part of the answer

and I feel we're going to get
so few points.

Why are you saying Texas
chainsaw's important?

Because they haven't put
the Texas chainsaw.

They haven't put that. So we are the
only people who should get points.

Because they got share it with the
nominees, and you said share it with

the crew and I decided to
kind of ignore that. Yes.

He calls his other nominees
his crew. That's just him.

LAUGHTER That's Bong Joon.

Tiger King's Carole Baskin asked you

if you knew what her trademark
greeting was. Did you get this?

Oh, yeah, we did get this actually.
What did you put?

I didn't do a murder. LAUGHTER

That is maybe one of her
catchphrases. Yeah.

What did you get? They're great.

I mean, I see where
the mix up's happened.

We haven't seen it.

Tony the Tiger isn't in it.
There's no reference to Frosties.

Well, then I feel like it
shouldn't be called Tiger King,

because if Tony's not in it, the
king isn't in it, is he? Thank you.

Very true. Really good point.

Yeah, it's a good point well made.

Joe, Richard, what did you get?

Erm... Hello, cats and kittens.

OK. I'm going to give you that

because her catchphrase is "Hey,
all you cool cats and kittens."

Yeah, close, innit? Oh! Here she is.

Hello, you cool cats and kittens.
It's Carole at Big Cat Rescue.

Cool cats and kittens.

I asked you what film was being described
by audience members with reviews such as

"It was the cinematic equivalent of
having your teeth pulled."

What have you gone for?
On Golden Pond.

What? The 1980 Oscar-winning...

Classic. I haven't seen it.

OK. James, Stacey, you've gone with,
er...

James. Back to the Future.

But hang on, one of the quotes
ended "What a waste of time,

better watch Back to the Future
again." Yeah. Right.

So you think someone was caught in a
loop watching Back to the Future

over and over again?
Well, they went to watch it.

That was rubbish and then,
by the end of the rant, they were,

like, I could be wrong actually.
I'm going to watch it again.

Dealt with themselves.

Joe and Richard, you went with?

Last Christmas, or Tenet.
Tenet is the right answer.

I never heard of Tenet.
No, I've never head of Tenet.

It's the big Christopher
Nolan thing.

Didn't he direct
Dunkirk, Christopher Nolan?

He did, yeah. Well, which is it?

What? What? Dunkirk or Tenet?

I think I might be low on batteries
because I...

He directed Dunkirk. That's it.

Then he went on a directed another
film about three years after

that one. LAUGHTER

What? Three years afterwards?
No, Dunkirk, the film of Dunkirk.

I'm not talking about the event,
the actual withdrawal.

So when do you think the film
Dunkirk came out?

Just sort of immediately
before the lockdown.

2017. Really, really?

Three years. LAUGHTER

Three years ago? Yeah.

Why are we correcting David?

Why don't we just let him
think this is real

and see how far we can prank him
by the end of the show

into thinking that he's in
a completely different year.

Laura Whitmore asked you what
Donald Fear did on TV for the first

time since 2006.
What did you put? Richard Ayoade?

Apply Anasol
live on Saturday Kitchen.

James, Stacey?

I don't think anything hasn't been
done on telly yet other than fly.

It hasn't been done since 2006.
Yeah. Oh!

Well, it could have been
a number of things then!

But you think he could fly?
You think the man could fly?

I just was thinking of things that
no-one's ever done before.

OK, what did you guys get?
David, Maya?

He organised three
episodes of Dad's Army in a row.

It hasn't been on TV since 2006.
Not three in a row.

Imagine.

I could tell you, Donald was the
first person to win a million pounds

on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire
since 2006.

OK, now it's time for a special
bonus round.

I'm going to show you three film
posters from this year which

have all been subtly improved.

All you need to do is tell me
what the film is.

Here's the first one.

LAUGHTER From name that film.

Ooh. Yeah. Erm...

Yes. I recognise it.

OK. All right. Next one.

Ah. LAUGHTER

Nice, isn't it?
It's how I feel about you.

Is that from Glastonbury
in 2005, Jimmy?

Transplant 2.

OK, and then the third one.

Oh, I know this one.
I know this one!

OK. David's still writing.
Trying to.

OK, so James and Stacey,
let's go to you.

What's the first one?
Jimmy Kiss Kiss.

Jimmy Kiss Kiss.

David, Maya?

Well, I put Mrs Joker, The Actual
Badass, because I know she had

her own film after and I think she's
the genius behind the Joker.

She deserved her own film,

but I don't know the name
so Mrs Joker, The Actual Badass.

Joe, Richard, what did you put?

Harley Quinn movie. Birds of Prey.
Was it called Birds... Ah!

It's the exact right answer,
you get a point. Well done!

Point, no point. Oh, no,
you got Harley Quinn.

Yeah, I... I think I'll give you
something for Harley Quinn.

You get a point there. Thank you.
Thanks. The second one.

Did anyone get this?
James, what did you put here?

Hair Transplant 2.

You're thinking he's only gone
and got extensions.

Hair Transplant 2.

Jimmy,
why don't you grow it long now?

I quite like it like this.

That seems like a waste.

If you're going to get a transplant,

just go for a full horse's
mane or something.

Yeah. You definitely missed a trick.

If they could do that, you know
I would.

So you got Hair Transplant 2.
You put?

We put Friday Night Project because
I didn't know the answer

so it's a thing that it
reminded me of.

OK, and you got?

Blades of Glory.

I mean, you're so close.
Oh, not...

So very close, but that came out
many years ago is the only issue,

and this is the quiz of 2020.

It was Eurovision Song Contest,
the Story of Fire Saga.

That film was released as an email.

It didn't even... you just got it
direct to your inbox.

It was not released as an email!

OK. Did you all get this one?
What did you get David, Maya?

I just put the things I could see.

The Jacket and the Ostrich.

Stacey, James?

We think it's Dolittle.

You're bloody right.
And you've got?

Still on the buses.
Dolitte. Dolittle.

It is still on the buses, isn't it?
It is still on the buses.

Yeah, it is still on the buses. Best
advertising dollar they ever spent.

Yeah. Dolittle. Dolittle. I'm sorry.

Dolittle definitely didn't
come out this year... Yes, it did.

..because it had Rex Harrison in it.

And Rex Harrison, I think, must have
died like last year or something.

So ages ago. Let's see how you're
all doing at the end of that.

OK, so in last place now -
you were in the lead - David

and Maya have four points, which
they had at the end of round one.

Oh. James and Stacey
have five points.

Joe and Richard in the lead
with eight.

We'll be back after the break,
although, let's face it, it's 2020,

all plans are provisional.
Hopefully, see you in five.

Welcome
back to The Big Fat Quiz of 2020.

Our next round is all about
science and technology.

In September, Sir David Attenborough
joined Instagram

and broke the then record
for the fastest time

to reach one million followers.

Well, perhaps if David Attenborough
spent a little bit less time

dicking about on Instagram,
and a little bit more time

saving the Earth, we wouldn't
be in such a mess.

In April, the US Department
of Defense released three

declassified videos of unexplained
aerial phenomena.

I remember the first time I saw
a flying saucer. I was terrified.

I said, "You expect me to get
in that and go to Planet Earth?"

The most Googled cocktail
and recipe during lockdown

were the espresso martini
and banana bread,

so I've put some under your desks.

Home-made banana bread
and an espresso martini.

Aw, did you make that?
The banana bread? Yeah.

These are the best pre-drinks ever
after a long day,

cos it's coffee and a shot in one.
Yeah. It's brilliant.

Did you call it a pre-drink?
Pre-drink, yeah, like.

As in to say it's not really
a drink, it's just a...

It's the pre before you
get to your rave. Yeah.

The drink you have before going
dance... Pre-dance, yeah.

Yes, pre-dance.
We're off to Rita Ora's in a bit.

I notice you've left the espresso
martini to one side

and you've downed the banana bread
in one, Stacey. It is delicious.

I don't like coffee that much
but bread and bananas, yes, please!

OK. I've got science and technology
questions.

First one. In January,
a new logo for Space Force

was unveiled by one Donald Trump.

It was described by Vox
as being "highly illogical"

and CNN reported that the logo
bore an uncanny resemblance

to another well-known insignia.
What was it compared to?

Ah, yeah, yeah.

So what was Space Force's
insignia compared to?

I'll do it real quick.

OK. Second one.

Why did this graphic on Twitter

make this man react like this
in May this year?

Oh, I know what this means,
Richard. I will answer this one.

Don't worry. Thank you.

So what did that mean on Twitter?

It upset Donald Trump.
What did it mean?

In November, television director
Tristram Shapiro hit the news

after his involvement
in a mishap on Zoom.

Shapiro said, "I'm
mortified about what happened.

"While I can't put the proverbial
toothpaste back in the tube,

"I move forward from this incident
a more empathetic man."

What did he do?
I... Do you know?

Yeah, I do know,
and I know Tristram Shapiro.

He's a very nice man.

Imagine trying to put
the toothpaste back in the tube.

Well, also the euphemism there would
suggest you did something

much, much worse on Zoom
than what he did. Yeah.

In October, Kanye West utilised
the very latest in technology to

give his wife, Kim Kardashian,

an impressive gift
for her 40th birthday.

She described it as "the most
thoughtful gift of her lifetime".

What was it?

Is David about to say Anusol?

The pandemic this year
has meant that

we now all use words we hadn't
heard of this time last year.

All I want you to do is tell me
what these words mean.

From the world of science...

Oh. Zoonosis - what does that mean?

Zoonosis.

Fomite. What does Fomite mean?

What is Doomscrolling?

And what is Zumping?
So, four of them.

Right. Right.

You locked down? You locked in?
Happy with those? Yeah. Yeah.

Is that like a fear of missing out,
fear of...?

We have finished.
OK. Here's some answers for you.

I wanted to know which
well-known insignia

the new Space Force logo
was compared to.

Did you get this?
We guessed on the McDonalds logo.

We drew an M for McDonalds.

So you think the Space Force logo
for America is the McDonalds logo.

Yeah, probably. Yes. Most likely.
I would say yes.

I'm going to say incorrect,
but good guess.

Joe, Richard? Star Trek.

Star Trek, and you've gone...?

We wrote something correct.
You're absolutely right.

Take a look. United States
Space Force is on the left,

and Starfleet Command
is on the right.

OK, yeah, it was compared to
Starfleet Command and rightly so -

it's exactly the same.

Would you go to the moon

if someone offered you,
like, all the money that you'd want?

I don't know what
I would spend it on at the moon.

I thought you were going to go,

"Would you got to the moon
if you had the opportunity?"

But you actually asked,
would you go to the moon if...

"For the right corporate fee,
of course he'd go to the moon!"

If we're talking about offshore,
that's got to be offshore, isn't it?

HMRC can't touch me up there.

What if there's nothing?
Sometimes I look at the sky

and think, "What if I am
in The Truman Show?"

Why are we even doing this?
This is such bullshit.

There's nothing up there.

No, but I don't think
it's a bad thing!

Just, like, what is time?
What is space?

Why, Stacey? Don't start on that.

Don't pull that thread!

No, but she has got a point.
You never know.

I don't think this is the show
for existential angst.

I know, I'm not angsty about it.
I just think...

You're not angsty, you just think there
might be nothing, and no such thing as time?

Stop silencing her. Let her speak

and we might find something
out about the universe.

I'm just saying, you know
when people are, like,

"Oh, you're late," and I'm
like, "No, I'm not. Says who?"

Actually, I take that back.
Let's move on.

Just because YOU
decided there was time.

It's the producer of Loose Women
and you need to be there.

But you don't know!

OK, answer number two.

Twitter added this icon
and it upset Donald Trump in May.

What does it represent?

There's nothing up there, Jimmy.
That's what it means.

James, what did you write for this?

We think it's when you're saying
something that's wrong.

So you know when they were doing
that big election

and Trump kept staying stuff, like,
"This election is rigged."

Twitter had to monitor what
he was saying by putting

the exclamation mark.
We put "truth mark". Truth mark.

Which is it?
It's better than what it is.

It's actually a fact check.

So what did you get,
what did you put? Joe, Richard?

Well, now it says,
"this claim is disputed."

Like, when he says that there's been
an election rigging, whatever.

That comes up
and says, "this claim is disputed".

And, Richard,
you wrote "shorten your tie".

That's the knot at the top.

It's from the perspective
of the tie wearer.

OK. Truth mark, and did you get
this? Yeah. Yeah.

OK. Well, here's an example.

So Donald Trump tweeted

on 7th November

and Twitter went,
"Yeah, did you though?"

He even put his own
exclamation mark in after it.

Mm. He knew he was lying.

I asked you if you knew why
Tristram Shapiro said

he was mortified after
a mishap on Zoom.

What did you get?

I was talking about putting the
toothpaste back in the... tooth jar!

What is the tooth jar?
Tooth jar! You know, the tooth jar.

What's it called?
The paste receptacle.

What is it called, the tooth jar?

What is it?
The tube, tube, tube!

Tube, you couldn't think
of the word tube!

I couldn't think of the word "tube".
I had this last year.

I forgot, for a brief moment,
I was in a restaurant,

I forgot what the concept of a child
was and a child walked past me

and I was, like, "What the fuck is
that tiny human?" For a minute,

I didn't know what a child was and
I couldn't remember what "tube" is.

What does that mean?
What does it all mean, though?

So I said about this guy getting
the toothpaste back in the tube.

Had he had a little,
a little, um, hand shandy?

He had not had a hand shandy.

He's one of the few people on Zoom

that hadn't embarrassed
himself in that way.

Richard, you got this right.

Yes, he said that an actor's
apartment was a sorrowful affair.

That is it. You didn't get
an answer for this at all.

We had wank. Had wank, yeah.

Yes, I thought
it was the man that had...

You thought it was the man
who had the wank.

He's not the man that had the wank.

Why would you ask about anyone
else?! Yeah. That's mad!

Because... Do you know what?
You're mad!

You're mad, mate.

If you're asking someone who
embarrassed themselves on Zoom,

and you know there was
a man who had a wank,

you're mad for not making it him.

You're absolutely mad.

We're not wrong here.

David, did you, um...?

He's a very nice man
and he basically was caught on Zoom

talking, doing Zoom auditions

and then the audition ended

and he was still on mic
and he didn't realise it.

He was talking about the actor
auditioning and saying,

who auditioned from a flat
that didn't look very nice

and he was essentially saying
"I feel sorry for these people.

"It's difficult in the pandemic.
They're trying to get work acting."

This is exactly right.
He was nice about them.

Yeah. Well, let's have a look
at the excruciating moment.

These poor people live in these
tiny apartments, like I'm looking

at his, you know, background and
he's got his TV and, and you know.

Yeah, mute it.

I know, it's a shitty apartment,

that's why give me this job
so I can get a better one.

All right, uh, ready?

Oh, my God, I am so, so sorry.

No, it's totally... Not mute.

Listen, I'm living in a...
I am so sorry.

I'm living in a four by four box.
It's fine.

Just give me the job
and we'll be fine.

Aww!

I mean, I have to say,
the flat looked quite nice to me.

I think he just did what everyone
does when you're on a Zoom call

with someone, where you,
you know, quietly judge them. Yeah.

"Nah, it's a shithole, mate."

Of course, he's not the only person
that messed up on Zoom this year.

A Spanish councillor accidentally
broadcast himself

having a shower during
a live-streamed council meeting.

Do you want to have a look at this
revealing and unfortunate moment?

Who brings their laptop
into the shower?

That is a recipe for disaster.
Yeah. Absolutely.

I asked you what
impressive tech gift

Kanye West got Kim
for her 40th birthday.

What did you all say?

It was a virtual reality
version of her dad that had died.

James? Stacey?

We put a hologram of
her father, who passed.

Yeah, I mean a hologram
of your live dad

would be a proper
waste of money.

Joe, Richard, what did you put?

I put a hologram of OJ's lawyer.

Which is the correct answer also
because her dad was,

of course, OJ's lawyer.

He didn't mention that
in the hologram speech. No.

It was creepy, and quite impressive.
Well, take a look.

You look beautiful, just like
when you were a little girl.

You married the most,
most, most, most,

most genius man in the whole world,
Kanye West.

And he has to do magic there
every night now he's dead.

Now we're onto
the definitions of words.

OK, so the first word was zoonosis.

Did you all know what
zoonosis meant? Yes.

What do you think?

We said being so bored at a zoo,
you feel hypnotised.

It would be a great name for that.
Mm. OK.

What did you think? James, Stacey?

Zoo disease.

Zoo disease? Yeah. You know,
he's got a bad case of zoonosis.

Yeah.

OK. Zoonosis -
what did you think zoonosis was?

Well, I thought it was to do with
Zoom when you're on Zoom for so long

and go a bit crackers,
so that's why...

Oh, ZOOM-osis?
Like a Zoom-nosis, but Zoonosis.

Zoonosis, disappointingly,
is any disease that is naturally

transmittable from vertebrate
animals to humans.

We should get a point for that.
Yeah.

We said zoo disease, which is
basically a summary of that.

I'll give you a point. I'll give you
a point for zoo disease.

No points, point, no points. OK.

Next one was fomite.
What did you think fomite was?

We thought that it was FOMO,

which is Fear Of Missing Out
from Fortnite.

Very popular game. Ooh, yeah.

OK. Incorrect, but
brilliantly worked out. Aw.

James, Stacey?

We believed it was probably
an unfriendly Marmite.

So not a friendly mite.
Yeah, a foe-mite.

A foe-mite. Exactly.

Yeah. Unfriendly Marmite.

It's better than what the answer is.

OK, Joe, Richard,
what did you get for this, Fomite?

I went down a similar thread
of Fear Of Missing Out, but then

I was in a rush, so just wrote
the first words that came to my mind

with those letters, so it's fear
of missing instant tank elephants.

Is that the right answer, Jimmy?
It is not exact.

A fomite is a contaminated surface.

So you have a fear of missing
instant tank elephants...

..Would be another way
of saying that.

No points, no points, no points.

I asked you what Doomscrolling was.

We put scrolling through
online news in 2020.

And that's the correct answer.
Oh, wow. Yeah.

Doomscrolling is obsessively
scrolling through

an excessive amount of apocalyptic
news. So, yeah, 100%.

What did you guys get? Nothing?
Tinder at a funeral.

That is what it should be called.
Doomscrolling.

And you got?

Scrolling all day on apps,

but all apps are apocalyptic news,
aren't they?

No, I don't think that's... Oh, God.

But, yes, and no, but well done.

OK, and I asked you
what Zumping was.

OK, we liked this one.

We went for humping during Zumba.

Yes, David, I know what you're like.

As soon as the Zumba comes on, "Oh!"

James, Stacey, what did you get?

Sleep jumping, like "zzzzzz-umping."

Do you know what I mean?

Let's move this along.
Joe, Richard, what have you got?

It's when you're on Zoom with
your partner and they've just had

a shower and they've embarrassed you

so you dump them via Zoom.

That is the correct answer.

It's dumping someone on Zoom,
is to zump them. Well done, yeah.

Finally, a right answer!
I know that.

OK, let's see how
you're doing after that.

I can tell you that
James and Stacy have eight,

David and Maya have nine.

In the lead,
Joe and Richard with 13.

This is excellent news.

Join us after the break
when we'll be answering

some of the biggest
questions of the year

like who was the idiot

that told Donald Trump not
to inject bleach into himself?

Welcome
back to The Big Fat Quiz of 2020.

The next round is all about people
who hit the news this year.

In April, Boris Johnson
welcomed a baby boy.

I'm not saying he's had
a lot of kids,

but when he arrived at the maternity
ward, Boris asked for the usual.

The new Chancellor of the Exchequer,
Rishi Sunak, is tee-total,

which I think goes some way
towards explaining why

he gave people money, time off,
and then shut all the pubs.

OK, time for some more big,
fat questions.

All about people.

First up, we're going over to R&B
legend, Craig David.

Ah. Hi, Jimmy.

Hope you are well, mate.

I'm off on tour next year
celebrating 20 years

of my first album, Born to Do It,
which I am so looking forward to.

Now, speaking of being born to do
it, my fellow musician,

Grimes and her partner, Elon Musk,

gave birth to their newborn son
earlier this year.

He was given a fairly
interesting name,

but can your teams remember what
they called him?

That's what I imagine the waiting
room at Dignitas to be like.

Very nice. That really has that
air to it, doesn't it?

It does, doesn't it? You touch that crystal
and then you just disintegrate. Yeah.

Now we know what he meant
when he said he chilled on Sunday.

That poor guy.

OK.

In March, Gal Gadot, Natalie Portman

and Cara Delevingne were all
involved in a video that went viral.

All I want to know is what
happened in that video?

I mean they weren't the only ones in
it. Loads of people in it.

All right. Next it's over to
one-of-a-kind, Mr Keith Lemon.

Hi, everybody.

Hi, there, Jimmy Carr.

My name is Chris Evans.

You might know me as Captain America
from The Avengers.

But, hey, I gotta question for you.

Back in September, I posted a little
boo-boo on the Instagram but,

hey, what was that boo-boo?

Back to you guys with the answer.
Yeah.

That was Chris Evans.

I mean we didn't ask him to do that.

He's got that stuff,
so he dressed up.

OK, Keith wants to know what
Hollywood's Chris Evans

posted then deleted on Instagram
back in September.

Question four, in this round.

In September, former Art Attack
presented, Neil Buchanan,

was forced to issue a denial.

What did he have to deny?

Oh, my God, I missed that one.

I'll write genocide,
you write what you want to write.

Hm. You all right there, Stacey?

You look a bit like you've just stared up and
thought is there anything there? Yeah, I'm just...

You look a bit like The Abyss. I am
questioning the world because I

didn't think Neil could do anything
wrong, to be honest with you.

It's not so much that he did
something wrong,

but people were saying something
about him that he didn't do.

He didn't do anything.
Oh, good, so he's defending himself.

He's defending himself.
Oh, I thought he got in trouble.

Even if he'd done it, it would
have been a good thing.

It would have been fine.

Finally, for this round, back
in January, Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop

company was selling a new
scented candle.

It cost $75
and sold out within hours.

You each have one under your desks.

Grab your candle. OK.

All I want to know is what
was it called?

Is this actually the candle?

Yes, this is actually the candle.
Oh, the actual name of it?

The actual name of the candle.

Is it supposed to be Gooch?
No, Goop.

It smells like Graham Gooch.

The finest opening batsman.

Ah, yes, I remember that smell.

Graham Gooch. It was only yesterday
when he strode out onto the wicket.

James, what are you eating?

Ice cream.

It's melted perfectly.
What flavour are you?

It's peanut butter ice
cream right now.

Wow. That is heavy.

Are you ready for answers?

Yeah. You've all got something. OK.

Right, first up, Craig David
wanted to know what tech billionaire

Elon Musk and his partner, Grimes,
named their child.

What did you put. James, Stacey?

Craig David.

You think they named their child
Craig David

and we got Craig David to ask
the question?

Yeah, that would be great,
wouldn't it?

That would be great. You're correct,
and you're wrong at the same time.

David, Maya?

Well, we thought Semen.

They would call their child...

Semen.

You've got to have respect for,
you know, where you came from.

Yeah. Also, that wouldn't
be a good name

because Semen Musk sounds, eurgh.

Not the right answer.

I think you're pretty close.

Could you pronounce that for me?

Yes, it's "up-dup-de-dop".

I think you've got it sort of right
there, you've got bits of it right.

X AE A-12. You get a half point
there cos you're pretty close.

The X stands for the unknown
variable, AE is the Elven

spelling of Ai, artificial
intelligence, and also a word

for love, A12 is the pre-cursor to
their favourite aircraft the SR17.

Why did they go for the pre-cursor
to their favourite aircraft

rather than just the favourite one?
And not the favourite aircraft.

Because SR17 would be a silly
thing to call a kid.

Yes, you're right.

Sorry, silly question.

Next, I asked you what Gal Gadot

and some of her celebrity friends
did in the video. Did you get this?

We said...

They sang Imagine in 15
different keys.

I mean that is specific.

James, Stacey?

Yeah, Imagine.

OK.

Sang Imagine but it was shite.

Let's remind ourselves
of the cringe-worthy

and pretty painful to watch
rendition.

♪ Imagine there's no heaven

♪ It's easy if you try

♪ Nothing to care or die for

♪ They say that I'm a dreamer

♪ And the world will be as one. ♪

Yeah, it's fairly cringe-worthy.

If you listen very carefully
though, at the end, you can

hear John Lennon
turning in his grave.

I just don't get the point.

I was, like, oh, this is cute but
why? Like it doesn't wh...

No, it fixed Coronavirus.
Don't you remember? No!

They did that right at the
beginning as well. Yeah.

That's, like, early to go nuts.

Even now I don't
feel on the verge of texting anyone

and going "Do you wanna do
something that batshit?"

If they'd done Rabbit,
by Chas & Dave...

You're familiar with Rabbit by Chas
& Dave? No. It's a hell of a tune.

♪ Bunny rabbit, you won't stop
talking!

♪ Why don't you give it a rest? ♪

It's a very wonderful hymn to
women shutting up.

OK. It's a lovely sentiment as a
song.

It really is so nice,
and especially at Christmas.

It's a song we also put on, cos we
go, it's Christmas, give it a rest.

It's a lovely... It's lovely to
have it musically backed up.

You used to be able to have a hit
song with basically misogyny.

Have a listen.

♪ You got beautiful eyes... ♪
Beautiful eyes, right? Ah, so sweet.

Lovely, lovely, lovely.

♪ You got beautiful thighs... ♪
OK, slightly hang on.

♪ You got a lot without a doubt

♪ But I'm thinking 'bout blowing
you out...

Because...

♪ You won't stop talking

♪ Why don't you give it a rest? ♪

This was a hit.

This was like a number one.

♪ You got more rabbit than
Sainsbury's

♪ Time you got it off yer chest... ♪

Couldn't even get to Sainsbury's cos
she was always bending your ear.

I mean I've been trying to get to
Sainsbury's for days now.

You won't stop talking.

If that was the end credits to
Loose Women, it would be so funny.

Keith Lemon asked you what Chris Evans posted
then quickly deleted from Instagram in September.

What did you put, David?

We guessed, so we just put product
placement for Anasol.

Oh, no, he showed the front not the
back. Joe, Richard?

A picture of his privacy.

What a lovely phrase. Thank you.

Stacey, James, did you get this?

Best day of my life in lockdown.

It was just so exciting to see
because you only ever see

average, everyday willies, don't
you? And then so when you see like

an A-list willy, you think "Oh, my
goodness, this is like gold dust."

I don't think there's a pretty
willy out there though.

Oh. How dare you!

Sorry. Sorry, but there isn't.

They all just look really sneaky
and, like, hello.

Oh, hello!

Do you know what? In fairness
though Stacey, I shouldn't have

had mine wearing a monocle
when I showed it to you?

Yes, so Chris Evans,
he made the best of the mishap,

so he tweeted that by mistake and
he took to Twitter and said,

"Now that I have your attention,
vote on November 3rd." Ah.

I asked you what Neil Buchanan was
forced to deny back in September.

What did you write on this,
James, Stacey?

We could only ever imagine that it
was, that he could fly or...

Existence of God. Yes.

Joe, Richard, what did you get?

Natural selection.

You think he denied, in September
of this year, natural selection?

He was forced to.

And then you've written underneath.

He's not dead. He's not dead.
No, he's not dead.

I think Maya and David have
the answer. David?

We put he denied being Banksy,
just like Banksy would.

That is the exact right answer.

Wow!

I knew he was just such an amazing
person. Thank you.

How's the ice cream going? You've
had a pint of peanut butter ice cream.

I've eaten the whole thing.

Erm, I feel sick.

Oh, yeah. Oh, no, peanut butter ice
cream will do that to a man.

Doesn't feel good?

I actually think me and him would
be friends in school.

How old are you? 35.

Is it? Yeah, boy.

Thought you were my age, 26.

No!

High five!

You haven't got facial hair,
you still look new.

Yeah. I'm a new boy.

Art Attack!

Wow. You are on a sugar high.

Never felt so alive.

Finally, I asked you the name
of Gwyneth Paltrow's candle.

What have you got?

Smells like my vagina.

And you've gone with, Richard?

This smells like my privacy.

Yeah. Earlier this year,

Goop brought out a candle called
This Smells Like My Vagina.

There it is in its glory.
Points all round.

If this is what her vagina
smells like, it is

a cause for medical concern.

OK. Time now for a very special
bonus round where I'm going to

introduce a mystery guest.

All you need to do is tell me

who they are and why
they made headlines this year.

You can only ask yes or no
questions.

Please welcome our mystery guest.

It's very nice to have you here.

They can only ask you yes or
no questions.

He made the news this year in a big
way. We'll all be familiar with this story.

Was it to do with the lockdown?

Yes.

Did you supervise the eye test at
Barnard Castle?

No. OK.

Are you Banksy?

No.

That's exactly what Banksy
would say. I've got it.

Banksy. Got you, sucker.

Are you anything to do with
the Government?

Is this story Government-based?

Yes.

Elaborate. No, he can't elaborate.
He can't!

Yes, or no questions.
Yes or no, mate.

Yes, or no. ♪ You've got to stop
talking. ♪ He's off.

♪ Bunny rabbit, bunny rabbit... ♪

So question-wise, so, so far
we have found that it's something to

do with the lockdown and he doesn't work for the
Government, but it's to do with the Government.

Is it a clip that went viral?

Were you caught in a clip? Yes. Oh!

It was a clip that went viral and
don't say what you think it was.

Don't say what you think it was.

Do you reckon? Something
governmental. Yeah.

What, that guy? He wouldn't
come on here if that was him.

No, OK.

Oh, oh. Oh, God.

But what was it? It was a...

Don't you look at my answer!
Don't look at the answer.

Joe, come on!

Hi, Stacey. How are you? I'm OK.

I know what it was too.

Yeah, back off. All right?

Joe, quick, write something.

Who gave Joe those curtains?

Erm... I brought them myself.

Isn't that clear?

James, Stacey, did you get anything?

We wrote masturbate live
and then we crossed it out.

David, who do you think this man is?

Wembley lasagne.

Wembley lasagne. What do you mean by
that?

What I mean by that is that there
was a hoax online and people,

some people believed it, that they
were making a giant

lasagne in Wembley Stadium to feed
people during lockdown.

OK, Joe, what did you get?

A voice memo that went viral
about a lasagne in Wembley.

OK. Could you tell them who you are?

I'm Billy and I'm responsible
for the Wembley voice note.

Hey. Yes! Points, points, no points.

We should hear it. Yeah.
It's a fine, fine prank.

Let's have a little listen.

Also, just so you know, my sister,
her boyfriend's brother

works for the Ministry of Defence...
Of course he does.

..they're basically worried

that people are going to get stuck
indoors without any food.

So one of the things that they're
doing is they're actually

working on making a massive lasagne.

So they're actually,
at the moment, as we speak,

they're building like the massive
lasagne sheets, but they're

having to make special sheets
obviously because they've not got

one big enough because they're making
lasagne the size of Wembley Stadium.

Looking forward to that because I do
quite like lasagne as well.

Billy, everyone.

I mean, come on, that's terrific.

So where did you get the idea?

There were just loads of voice notes
going around at the time

and I was kind of bored at home,
working and thought,

do you know, I'm going
to stick something out there.

Apparently a lot
of your ex-partners have said

they knew it was you because you're
obsessed with lasagne. Yeah.

"A lot of your ex-partners."

Apparently he mentions
lasagne a lot. Yeah, yeah.

There was quite a few.
Are you Garfield?

So, at end of that round,
the scores are...

..James and Stacey have 11. Woo!
Just ahead, David and Maya, with 13.

In the lead are Joe and Richard with
17 and a half.

Wow! Wow!

We're going to take
a quick break now

but give it up one more
time for Billy the Lasagne Boy.

Welcome back to The Big Fat Quiz.

Our next round is
all about the music of 2020.

I truly believe that music can heal
our fractured world by bringing us

all together to collectively hate
Gal Gadot for singing Imagine.

In August, Simon Cowell
broke his back falling off

a new electric bike.

The last time
he fell from such a height was

when he fell off his shoes.

In July, Q Magazine folded
after 34 years.

It's weird to think that in 2020
people don't want to buy

a magazine with a nine-page Kasabian
interview and a free Biffy Clyro CD.

Who's going to interview the
Arctic Monkeys and Pearl Jam now?

Hopefully, no-one.

OK. Time for some music questions.

Take a look at these lyrics.

The were transcribed by a fan
from a performance at one

of the biggest music
events of the year.

All I want to know is, who what
was the artist, what was the song?

"Put the pole on a light,
the shite's from you,

"You wind up like
the wreck you are...

"I'm a camel back again."

♪ Look at me,
I'm a camel back again... ♪

One of the biggest music events this
year, one of the biggest singers,

if not the biggest
singer in the country.

Right now?
For the last 30, 40 years.

Oh, God, he's old. 40 years?

40. I think we've got the answer
right to this music question,

which I'm not sure
I've ever done before.

You've got to write the song
as well. The song?

The song and the artist.
Oh, fuck off!

The song?! Oh...

That was a real genuine "fuck off".

Oh, Jesus Christ.

I've got the singer.

OK, you've all got something.
We've got it, mate.

Next we've got a question
from YouTuber and rapper KSI.

Hey, Jimmy. This year in May,

I released my debut album
Dissimulation,

but a month early in April
a newcomer climbed the charts,

and set a new world record

when they knocked The Weeknd
off the top spot.

Who was it and what was the song?

OK. Back in April, the somewhat
ironic newcomer topped the charts.

So that was quite early
in lockdown, wasn't it? Yeah.

I'm supposed to know this.

One song released this year
had people up in arms,

with US political pundit
Ben Shapiro particularly worried.

He tweeted, "My only real concern
is that the women involved,

"who apparently require a
'bucket and a mop',

"get the medical care they require."

What song had him so worried?

Oh, yes.

Fourth question in music.

Take a look at Foo Fighters
frontman Dave Grohl

performing a catchy new
song in September.

Take a look at this.
Listen to the lyrics.

Simple question -
who the fuck is Nandi?

I know this shit. Do you? Nandi.

Who's Nandi?
I ain't telling you.

Why are you being stiff? Huh?

Why are you being weird now?
I am being stiff.

These are our questions,
we're not giving you the answers.

No peeking. All right.

You ain't looking at nothing.
That's fine.

Oh, shit!

I meant to just do that and then
I nearly killed you instead.

That's a little bit inappropriate.

Maya, that was the scariest
moment of my fucking life.

In my mind, when I smacked it
against the thing, it would

just stream down
so you couldn't see anything.

I didn't think "it'll topple over
and kill someone."

For our next question, it's over to
the Channel 4 newsroom,

and the one and only Jon Snow.

He's reporting on one of
the biggest songs of the year,

but can you guess which one?
Take it away, John.

An American man is attempting
to sue his ex-girlfriend,

claiming she deceived him and
made him spend up all his cash.

The plaintiff, who is in his 30s,

said he originally thought
he would be single forever

until he met the defendant,
but later realised that she,

who he describes as "an angel",

was only with him
to get back at her ex-lover.

He became suspicious
of the defendant's intentions

when he felt she didn't care for him
when they kissed.

He states he had spent
all of his cash on her

under the pretence
that she felt the same as him.

The plaintiff admitted to a lack of
evidence over the defendant's

alleged infidelities,
simply telling the court,

"I know she creepin',
I feel it in the air."

More updates as we get them.

Back to you, Jimmy.

We know what this is.
You know what this is? OK.

I'm not entirely sure I know of
a song that has come out this year.

No!

OK, let's have some answers.

I showed you those lyrics,
transcribed from a performance

from a well-known musical legend.

Did you get this?

Richard Ayoade got it. Go on.

Rabbit, Chas and Dave.

That is not the correct answer,
and I think you know that.

No, we did the other one.

I'm Still Standing.

Go on, you've got?

I'm Still Standing by Elton John.

Stacey, James?

That's what I got from it. OK.

Well, that is correct.

David, you got?

Well, I got Elton John. I was
very happy with that situation,

and then you had to say what song
and I had absolutely no idea.

So I put Candle In the Wind,

on the basis that
that is one of his songs

and so it might have been that. Mm.

OK, we're going to take a look
at Elton John's disconcerting

yet enjoyable performance but,

before we do,
I will say he's a legend.

I'll take Elton on a bad day
over anyone else on a good day.

Here's Elton John.

SINGS "I'm Still Standing" NASALLY

It was Elton John singing
I'm Still Standing

for the One World Together At Home
virtual concert.

Has he re-learnt
all of his songs from Vic Reeves?

OK. Next one, KSI asked you which
newcomer set a world record

when he knocked
The Weeknd off number one.

OK, so this is a musical question,
so James and Stacey,

we can agree a dead person
is the wrong answer, yes? Well...

And, Joe and Richard, you wrote?
Joe Biden.

So David Mitchell,
with the correct musical answer,

go on, what have you got?

We put Captain Tom and maybe other
old people who he sung it with.

Yeah, it was Captain Tom. It was
Michael Ball sung it with him.

Aw. Not that old!

How old is Michael Ball?

He's a medium old age.

Medium oldie. Happy to medium.

He's got to be above average age,
hasn't he?

Not quite as much above average
as Captain Tom.

Yeah, Tom is moving the average.

I mean, I reckon I'm
probably above average age.

No! I'm 46.

What's the average age of a person?
He is my Dad's age.

Imagine that, look.
You could have birthed me.

I've never felt so young!

OK. Captain Tom with his number one,
You'll Never Walk Alone.

I asked you what song
received complaints

and led to US political pundit
Ben Shapiro tweeting:

What did you think it was? Joe?

Was it Cardi B and
Megan Thee Stallion

with their top hit,

Wet Ass Pussy?

And that's the only way
that should be pronounced.

Yeah. Yeah, correct.

Stacey, Joe, did you get this?
Yeah. WAP. Yeah, that is correct.

Maya, David? Yeah.
Wet and gushy.

That's what you said, isn't it?

Well, this is a conversation
I'm finding difficult to negotiate.

Well, it's very hard
being a new father.

Shall we continue with the quiz?

Yes, because you've got to go to
Maya's parents' evening in a minute!

Yeah. OK. I showed you Dave Grohl
performing a new track

all about someone called Nandi.
I wanted to know who's Nandi.

Did anyone get this?
She's a kid who plays the drums.

That is the right answer.
She's a kid that plays the drums

that challenged Dave Grohl
to a drum-off online

and he took to the challenge
and then she kind of beat him

in the drum-off and then he wrote
a song about her as a prize.

He's a very nice man.

She's also his chiropodist.

Yeah.

She's become a chiropodist.

I don't know if that's true.
Yeah, I am sure. No points.

That's what she's going to fall back
on if the drumming doesn't work out.

It's good to have a trade.
What did you write for this, Maya?

We said is it the correct
plural of "Nando",

as in more than one
branch of Nandos?

One Nando, many Nandi?

No point, point, no point. Let's
take a look at Nandi in action.

She's a remarkable young woman.
Have a look at this.

♪ And I wonder... ♪

Bloody hell! Only a chiropodist
would play drums barefoot.

Exactly. Look at those feet.
Those feet are in top condition.

You saw Jon Snow reporting on one of
the biggest songs of the year.

Did you get what it was?

We sort of didn't really follow it,
but then I wondered maybe

it's what Boris Johnson sung to
Carrie Symonds when he proposed.

It wasn't a hit song, it turns out.

Richard, Joe?
Well, you've got...?

The Joe Biden rap.

No points, no points.
What have you got, Stacey?

Is it Savage Love by Jason Derulo?

Well, let's go back to Jon Snow.

♪ Savage love

♪ When you kiss me,
I know you don't give two fucks

♪ But I still want that...
That savage love

♪ Your savage la-la-love

♪ Your savage la-la-love

♪ You can use me

♪ Cos I still want that... ♪

OK, that's right.
It is TikTok favourite

Savage Love by Jason Derulo.

Time now for a special bonus
question from the esteemed actor

Charles Dance.
He's reading an extract

from a celebrity biography
released in 2020.

Who is the mystery author?
Take a look.

Chapter 39.

Dem Babies.

Nick's proposal to me
was wrapped in child-like romance.

He was always eating candy,
which the eternally 12 in me

found totally acceptable
for a grown man.

With that enormous luminous smile
of his, Nick gave me

one of those big candy ring pops.

It was among other confections
inside a little metal

Hello Kitty lunchbox.

I thought, OK,
this is cutely festive.

I'll eat some candy with him.

Disguised as a candy pop ring

was a large, clear,
emerald-cut diamond

flanked by two moon cut diamonds,

surrounded by smaller pink diamonds.
A very real ring.

It was dazzling,
and matched the situation.

I wore a lavender dress
with a pink cardigan,

and we took a helicopter ride
over the city,

and marvelled at the lights,
and revelled in a moment.

That night, Nick and I
sparkled and shone

brighter than
the Empire State Building itself.

Aw! So, Charles Dance.
Whose biography was he reading from?

Oh, what do you think?
Is it Nasty Nick?

It is not Nasty Nick.

It's a big biography this year,
came out...

I would say... a diva-ish.

That is kind of how
she talks the whole time.

She. Slightly diva-ish view
of the world.

Oh, I know who it is! Huge star.

Have you all got something for this?
Yeah.

Whose biography
did you think it was?

We thought it might be Mariah Carey.

OK. You've got?

Mariah Carey.
And you've gone with.

Can I just say, I am Jewish,

so obviously, when
James suggested this answer,

I thought, well,
what the hell do I know?

It could well be this.

But now that everyone is
saying Mariah,

it seems a ridiculous answer.

Yeah. So you thought
it might be The Bible,

and it was God's biography.

You thought that might be
in God's biography,

where she - SHE - gets proposed to
and they go on a helicopter ride.

Yes, because God is a she!
I don't know that bit of the Bible!

I mean, I've not been to
Sunday School in a while,

but I think that would
have stuck out.

A lot of stuff happens in that book.

Who's got time to comb
through it all?

Let's go back to Charles Dance
for the answer.

That was an extract from
The Meaning of Mariah Carey,

by Mariah Carey.

OK, so points, points, no points.

Let's see what that's
done to the scores.

OK, so currently, in last place,
James and Stacey with 15.

Just one ahead,
David and Maya with 16.

Way in the lead, Joe and Richard
with 20 and a half. Wow!

We'll be back in a minute to ask
some of the biggest questions

of the year, like has Adele
really lost all that weight

or is she just standing much further
away than she did in 2019?

Welcome back to The Big Fat Quiz
of 2020.

This next round is all about sport.

In July, Liverpool won the Premier
League title for the first time

in 30 years - a fact you'll know
if you've spoken to a Scouser

for more than 30 seconds this year.

In October, Lewis Hamilton broke
the record for the most F1 wins

of all time.

It's an incredible achievement,
particularly when you think about

how many times his car is randomly
pulled over by the police.

Hardly any football games have had
crowds since March,

so if there are any Premier League
referees watching,

I just want you to know,
on behalf of all fans,

everyone still thinks
you're a wanker.

Time for some sporting questions.

OK. First up, it's over to sporting
legend, Chris Kamara.

Evening, Jimmy.

The best thing about 2020 for me

was releasing my latest Christmas
album...

♪ ..And A Happy New Year. ♪

And I reckon South Korean
football club FC Seoul

will be wishing for a happier year
next year

after they were given a record
fine of $81,000 back in May.

But can you tell me what the
fine was for?

Don't, like, say you've got
a Christmas album out

and then sing awfully immediately
in order to advertise it!

Big up, Chris, though.
Big up, Chris.

So, he wants to know why South
Korean football club FC Seoul

got fined $81,000 back in May.
Why?

I have absolutely no idea.

Here's the clue. No-one was allowed
in the stands back in May.

Do it.

You go. I'm off.

OK. Back in February, Tyson Fury
beat Deontay Wilder

to the WBC Heavyweight crown.

All I want to know is how did
Tyson Fury celebrate his victory

in the ring after his
post-match interview?

So, he got interviewed in
the ring afterwards,

he did something for two minutes,
it was extraordinary and weird,

and very Tyson Fury.

He's a bit... He's a silly boy,
isn't he?

He is quite a silly boy, isn't he?
Silly boy, Richard Ayoade. OK.

Brazilian footballing legend
Ronaldinho

was jailed for 32 days back in March
for having a fake passport.

During his time in prison,
he played football,

won a match and won a prize.

All I want to know is,
what unusual prize did he win?

So, he got sent to
prison for 32 days. I don't know.

Went to prison, played a bit of
football in there and won a prize.

What did he get for winning
a match in prison?

OK, this is Laura Clark. This photo
of her was widely circulated

and she became the centre of
attention in the sporting world

back in September.
All I want to know is, why?

I know nothing about sports.

I think I know this.
What happens in September?

What happens in September?

Yeah. Sporting-wise.

In September, England
and Tottenham player Eric Dier

posted this image to his Instagram
with the caption

"The Real Man of the Match."
Why?

You can work this one out.

It's very attractively presented,
isn't it,

with the toilet roll there.

It's the discarded toilet
roll on the side which is a concern.

Are you ready for answers?
Oh, yeah.

OK. Chris Kamara asked you if you
knew why South Korean football team

FC Seoul were fined $81,000.
Did you know?

Did they use two footballs?

No, but it's a great idea to
brighten up the game.

It would be cheating, wouldn't it?

Easier to score a goal
if there's two of them.

Easier to be scored against as well,
though, when you think about it.

Not if you keep hold of them!

What did you, um... Richard started
it and asked me to finish it.

He put, "They filled the stands..."

and I put, "..with piss."

Uh, no. James, Stacey?

Well, you said that they put
something in the stands that

disrupted it, so we put lovers.

I'm going to give you
a point for that. Yeah?

Who would have thought it, James?

They couldn't have spectators
so they used adult dolls.

They basically used sex
dolls to fill the stands, so...

I mean lovers -
you put it very politely.

They're lovers! That's their job.
There they are.

I asked you if you knew what
Tyson Fury did

to celebrate his win
against Deontay Wilder?

What did you think
he did in the ring?

The Hokey Cokey?

You think he did the Hokey Cokey in
the ring? Yeah. Oo-oh.

How does it go?

Who-ooa!

That's only when ghosts sing it.

Go on, what did you put?
He touch-typed.

He's a silly boy.

You are a very silly boy.
He didn't touch-type because...

No, he probably
didn't have the time.

What did you think
he did in the ring?

What did we put?
You suggested that...

You said he likes his dad
and he likes dancing.

He loves reggae.
And reggae. I didn't put reggae.

He loves reggae. I said he did a
dance and shouted in his dad's face.

Yeah. That was one of your
suggestions. You know what?

Out of all the families I've ever
seen on telly - Kardashians,

whoever - the Tyson family is one I
would love to be a part of.

I feel like I'd blend
perfectly into.

He's quite a crazy guy. Yeah.

If I ever meet him, I'll tell him.

I can tell you, he sang American Pie
for two minutes like a lunatic.

♪ A long, long time ago

♪ I can still remember

♪ How that music used
to make me smile...

♪ Good ol' boys were drinkin'
whiskey and rye

♪ Singin', "This'll be
the day that I die...

What?!

♪ "This'll be the day that I die"

♪ Well, I know that
I'm in love with you

♪ Cos I saw you dancin' in the gym

♪ We both kicked off our shoes... ♪

Well, who's going to stop him?

Do you know what it is?

Every clip I see of them,
it makes me love them even more,

because I'm like, look at you.

All you want to do is love your wife
and have some kids

and have a nice time.
I'll tell you what -

he's very similar to David Mitchell.
He is!

Exactly.

You know what you're like
when you've had a ruck

and then you start a sing-song?

You know what you're like, David.
You know what you're like.

Well, it's the only thing to do with
all the excess adrenaline,

isn't it, when you've punched a few
people unconscious.

I asked you if you knew what
Ronaldinho got

for winning a prison football match.
What do you think?

An enormous cigarette.

It's like a currency in prison,
cigarette.

James and Stacey?

Keys to Shawshank.

LAUGHTER The keys to Shawshank.

Yeah, we thought he probably got
the key...

Maybe he was in Shawshank. Yeah.

And for doing well at the football
or whatever he did,

they gave him keys
to Shawshank as a present.

It is not as crazy as the answer.
What did you get Joe, Richard?

Bafta. Bafta.

He did not get a Bafta.

He got a 16 kg suckling pig.

Wow. In jail?

So, in his trophy cabinet now,
he has the World Cup,

the Champions League Trophy,
the Ballon d'Or,

the Fifa World Player of the Year
twice,

and a suckling pig.

Oh, he should really put it outside.

I asked you why Laura Clark became
the centre of attention

in the sporting world
back in September.

What have you written there, David?

Djokovic hit a tennis ball at her.

That is the right answer but I'm
interested, James and Stacey,

you remember it differently.

Well, you said September as a clue.

You said, what happens in September,
so we were, like, oh,

it's, like, it's sports day.

Egg and spoon race.
Egg and spoon champ.

They would always
do like a parents' race.

She does look as if she's doing
an egg and spoon race.

She does look like she's doing
egg and spoon.

Just been hit in the neck with
a tennis ball at high speed,

and then they disqualified Djokovic.

Richard, what have you got?

She got hit by a tennis ball.

That is the right answer.
Yeah. Point.

Weird time for the guy on the left
to propose, isn't it?

I wanted to know why footballer
Eric Dier posted this image

to his Instagram with the caption
"The Real Man of the Match."

James and Stacey?

He married a toilet.

LAUGHTER Incorrect.

Joe, Richard?

I don't know sport very well,

but is it possible that a toilet
came on the pitch and scored a goal?

I will not dignify that
with an answer.

Maya? David's going to take this one
because this answer was

something you were really
passionate about, wasn't it?

Yes, he got the shits.

That's a correct answer.
You get a point for that.

He ran off the pitch
mid-game to defecate

and then came back on and did very
well, got Man of the Match.

But have we confirmation that he
had loose stools?

I mean, he could have
ran off the pitch

and just done a sort of normal
perfectly firm turd.

Just a little rabbit poo, innit?

In which case my answer
would not be correct.

Yes. It's just come in.
You get half a point.

There we go.

It's now time to step away
from sport for Say What You See.

So, all you've got to do is say what
you see in the pictures

and it will give you
a headline from the year.

So, say what you see
as quick as you can.

It's a whole... It's one phrase.

So, Balls, ward. Something ward.

Ton. Maya, you should get this,
because this is Bristol-related.

Yeah, I know,
don't put pressure on me.

Yes! I got it!
OK, great, write it down.

Write it down. Bristol-related.
That's the clue.

Taken down.

We got it. OK.

James Acaster, I've never seen
you this excited.

I've finally found what I'm
good at in my life,

and it's this. OK.

What have you got, James?

Edward Colston statue taken down.

Oh, "coals ton," argh, aack!

Stat chew. Excellent.

"Edward ton taken down" -
so no points.

Points, points.

Very good.

"Ed ward coals ton
stat chew Taken down."

Beautiful. OK. APPLAUSE

Let's take a look and see what
that's done to the scores.

I can tell you the scores are -

James and Stacey have 19,

David and Maya have 19.5,

in the lead, Joe and Richard,
with 23.5.

It's all still to play for.

Join us after the break when our
contestants will be taking part

in my surprise Celebrity Naked
Attraction round.

Stay tuned.

Welcome back to the final part
of The Big Fat Quiz of the Year.

The next round is all about
the water cooler moments

that defined 2020.

In August, the government
launched a scheme called

Eat Out to Help Out
because, apparently,

you can't catch Covid from oral sex.

The furlough scheme
was introduced this year

and was designed
to support everyone,

unless you were
self-employed, freelance,

used to earn more money
than they decided was OK,

owned your own company,
worked at a theatre

or were just about to start a new
job, in which case you were fucked.

Here we go, last set of questions.

Firstly, it's over to Nicola
Coughlan from Derry Girls.

Hello, Jimmy.

So, I absolutely loved the costumes
I wore in my new series, Bridgerton,

but that is not the only iconic
fashion moment I loved this year.

Moschino's Creative Director,
Jeremy Scott,

was dubbed a "creative genius"

when he debuted the collection
for spring-summer 2021.

But what was so unusual about it?

So they did a fashion show
in the middle of the pandemic.

Oh, oh, I know this one!
Obviously, people couldn't be there,

so what was unusual
about that fashion show?

Oi, SS, back off.

If only I wasn't short-sighted.

Curtain's going up.
Curtain's going up.

The curtain's going up. OK.

Question number two. Lily Allen
had a new release in October.

It was called Liberty.

What was so unusual about it?

I'll do this one. OK, great.

Of course the Loose Woman
is getting this!

OK, for the next question,
it's over to YouTubers

and novelty song
musicians, LadBaby.

Hi, Jimmy!

We're Mark and Rox,
also known as LadBaby.

And we have a pretty big
social media following,

which means we like to
keep abreast of everything

that's going on online.

So we couldn't help but
notice, back in September,

when Wayne Lineker, brother of Gary,

raised a few eyebrows when
he posted a list of criteria

he was looking for in
a future girlfriend.

Can your teams tell
us three of the things

that he listed as his
desired requirements?

So what is Wayne Lineker
looking for in a partner?

Do you want to do it? All I know
is one was "loves to travel".

There's Wayne Lineker,

which I think he's only
being kept alive for parts.

If he was in the crisp adverts,
it'd be a very different story.

After spending £2.4 million
doing up their UK house,

Frogmore Cottage, Prince Harry
and Meghan Markel moved to America

and handed the keys
over to which couple?

So Meghan Markel and Prince Harry

did up their Frogmore Cottage
for £2.4 million,

and then they gave it
to another couple.

Who did they give it to?
Final question in this round.

Take a look at these entertaining
home-made videos of Jack Black,

Mick Fleetwood and Jennifer Garner.

All I want to know is
what are they all doing?

Oh.

What's he doing?

What's Mike Fleetwood doing?
What's he doing?!

Jennifer Garner there,
what is she doing?

She's got a lot of washing, hasn't
she? She's got a big ole washer.

What are they all doing?

They're all doing an example
of a thing that was huge this year.

Is it fucking about at home?

That was quite massive this year.

I mean, yeah. Is it? That was a big
thing this year. It's not that.

I asked you what was unusual

about Moschino's
spring-summer fashion show.

What did you put?
Pets, of course. Pets?

Pet fashion show.

You thought it was a pet
fashion show? Yeah.

Ah, OK. What did you
put, David, Maya?

Well, we said it was...

Yeah, celebs pretended to be
there, but they were at home,

so it was like a
virtual reality show.

I mean, you're a fashion
Instagram, kind of person.

Well, yeah, if I'm wrong,
I'm sorry, everyone, but...

Apology accepted, you are wrong.

Joe Lycett, though, and Richard
Ayoade, the real fashion people.

Thank you.

They were puppets.

Let's take a look.

Puppets, it was
a puppet fashion show.

Puppet fashion show!
How completely fucking pointless!

I missed it. Why don't they just
take the opportunity of the pandemic

to not have fashion shows?

They should have
taken the opportunity

of them being pointless years ago.
Fashion is timeless, darling.

Just stop it.

Walking up and down
in something nice.

Question two. I asked
you what was unusual

about Lily Allen's
latest release, Liberty.

What did you all put?

It had to be injected.

You've put, Stacey?

It was for her very own vibrator.

Maya, David? We put vibrator.

It was a sex toy, and Lily hoped
it would help people feel empowered.

This, is it. It's the,
uh, it's a womaniser,

named after David Mitchell.

OK, um.

Lad Baby wanted to know if
you could list three things

that Wayne Lineker
wanted in a woman.

What have you got?

OK, he wants a woman
that loves to travel,

loves the lavish life,
fun-loving, young with fake tits.

Three points. What did you guys put?

We put young, quiet and fit.

Two points for young and fit.

He wanted someone
outgoing not quiet. Yes!

What did you put Joe, Richard?

I said, work from Ibiza or
the pool, which is where he is.

Work from Ibiza or
the pool is right.

That was one of the requirements.
Likes sports cars, is that there?

Is it? OK. And then must like eggs.

Health food. Loves eggs.
Three points.

You can't have a point for eggs.
Come of it, mate.

It says here, one of
my favourites, it says...

That's tough. It's quite harsh,
isn't it? That is tough, yes.

That's the problem with Chomsky,

very intelligent, but what
a bloody pain in the arse.

OK. I wanted to know
who Harry and Meghan

handed the keys to
Frogmore Cottage to.

Did you get this, Stacey?

Kylie and Jason.

So close! That would have
been great. Wouldn't it?

It would have been nice. Magical.

Joe, Richard? Dom and Dick.

Are they still active?
Dick and Dom, surely.

Dom and Dick. It's like Ant and Dec,
you don't say Dec and Ant.

No, they're
actually... Dick and Dom.

No, it's like McCartney after
John Lennon died, he actually,

they wanted it swapped
just to get equal time.

David, Maya, what did you put?

Usually the princess and her
husband, the man... Jack.

..they. Is the right answer. Yes.

They've now got the house.

He's got one pocket too many, there.

The top one's for stamps.

I asked you what Jack
Black, Mick Fleetwood

and Jennifer Garner were
up to, what did you put?

Apparently, is this right?

No, no, David, stop it.

What? You know just as well as I do.

I know just as well as you do.
So tell them with your chest.

Say it proud.
It's the WAP Challenge.

It's a challenge, but it's not a
WAP challenge, it's more general.

It's not a WAP challenge?!
What the fuck?!

Only one of them did
the WAP. James, Stacey?

We thought it was the WAP challenge
too. Yeah, we thought that.

Joe, Richard? Miming to songs.
Miming to songs.

They're not, they're all
doing TikTok challenges.

Ah, TikTok. Not WAP.

Jack energetically took
part in a WAP dance challenge.

Mick Fleetwood took part in the
Fleetwood Mac Dreams challenge,

and Jennifer Garner took part in the
Think About Things dance challenge.

Oh, yes, TikTok. All right.

Time now for the final
Big Fat Question.

Please welcome, all the way
from Madame Tussauds, London,

the Commander in Chief,
Donald Trump.

Yes, four more years!

2020 marked the end of Donald
Trump's tenure as president,

so we wanted to test your knowledge

of Donald Trump's
wisdom over the years.

So, we're going to play a
game called Trump or Gump.

So I'll give you a phrase,

you've just got to tell me
did Donald Trump say it,

or was it someone else.

Grab your paddles. OK.

So you only get a point
if you both agree.

You get five bonus points
if you get then all right.

Woo! OK. We've got this. All right.
Paddles at the ready, everyone.

All right.

Was that Donald Trump
or was it Batman?

"He was a monster, and he's no
longer a monster, now he's dead."

OK, hold your panels up.

Trump. So you're going
Trump, you're going Trump.

OK, Gump. We go Gump.
You're going Gump. Yep.

I can tell you the answer is...

So true.

Ah. Ha!

OK.

Was that Donald Trump or Elon Musk?

I don't think he would say that.

I would go Gump cos I don't
think Trump would say that.

You think Elon Musk. You think
Trump. You think Trump.

I can tell you, the answer is...

So true.

Next one.

Was that Donald Trump or
was it Arnold Schwarzenegger?

Let's go Trump.
We're going to go Trump? Oh.

OK, you're going Trump. You're
going Trump. You're going Trump.

I can tell you the answer is...

..Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Fake story after fake story.

OK, next one.

- "Tell that bitch to be cool.
- Bitch, be cool.

"I love those lines."

Was that Donald Trump
or Charlie Sheen?

Oof!

OK, so, Charlie Sheen, Charlie
Sheen. And you're going Trump.

You're going Trump. I think we're
going Trump. OK. I can tell you...

- ..you're correct. That was Donald Trump.
- That is so true.

OK, final one of these.

Is it Donald Trump
or is it Jeff Bezos?

Oh, that does sound Trump.
Oh, it's definitely Trump, isn't it?

Do you think it's
Trump? It's Trump.

OK, so, Trump, Gump, Trump.

And I can tell you
the answer is...

So true.

He said all of that stuff.
Well, apart from that thing, yeah.

Apart from Arnie. Yeah. He's a
terrible human, it turns out.

So the final scores are,

in last place, and
there's no shame in it,

James and Stacey. The dream team,

cinnamon and shepherd's
pie, 24 points.

Well done. CHEERING

Second, David and Maya.

26 and a half points,
congratulations.

But the winners of The Big Fat Quiz

for the worst year there's ever
been with 29 and a half points,

Joe Lycett and Richard Ayoade.

And that's it. A big thank
you to all our panellists,

our special guests, and thank you
to you for watching it at home.

I'm Jimmy Carr, this has been
The Big Fat Quiz of the Year.

Goodnight!

We should've worked harder. That
would've been nice, wouldn't it?