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Previously, On the Big C...
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00:00:02,135 --> 00:00:04,503
I've returned with a new
respect for my African roots,
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00:00:04,537 --> 00:00:07,239
so from now on, I want you all
to call me Ababuo.
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00:00:07,273 --> 00:00:09,241
While you were gone,
dad had a heart attack
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00:00:09,275 --> 00:00:10,376
and died for a little while.
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00:00:10,410 --> 00:00:11,844
I am a blogger.
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00:00:11,878 --> 00:00:14,380
I feel the need to write it all
down while it's still fresh.
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00:00:14,414 --> 00:00:16,615
I mean, I saw the light.
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00:00:16,649 --> 00:00:17,950
This is your key fob.
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00:00:17,984 --> 00:00:19,084
The lightning bolt shocks
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00:00:19,119 --> 00:00:20,753
your heart back
into a regular rhythm.
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00:00:20,787 --> 00:00:22,221
Keep it with you at all times.
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00:00:22,255 --> 00:00:24,523
The only problem
with your London pub
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00:00:24,557 --> 00:00:26,425
is that there's just not
enough londoners in it.
15
00:00:26,459 --> 00:00:27,893
Are we going to see you
tomorrow, Alexis?
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00:00:27,961 --> 00:00:29,261
Most likely.
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00:00:29,295 --> 00:00:30,229
I gotta get a job
and make some money
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00:00:30,263 --> 00:00:31,397
and turn my heat on.
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00:00:31,431 --> 00:00:32,931
Clearly the meds are talking.
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00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:34,633
I'll keep my ears open.
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00:00:34,667 --> 00:00:35,901
There might be something
at the school.
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00:00:35,969 --> 00:00:38,103
- Cathy Jamison?
- Good luck.
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00:00:38,171 --> 00:00:40,639
Do you think praying
really does anything?
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00:00:40,673 --> 00:00:41,740
The Bible says it does.
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00:00:41,775 --> 00:00:43,308
Your tumors are continuing
to shrink.
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00:00:43,343 --> 00:00:45,444
Some of them disappeared.
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00:00:45,478 --> 00:00:46,979
That's great.
Hell, yeah!
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00:00:47,013 --> 00:00:49,982
Shh.
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00:01:00,827 --> 00:01:02,828
♪ It's so hard
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00:01:02,862 --> 00:01:07,800
♪ to turn your life over
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00:01:09,669 --> 00:01:11,570
♪ step out
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♪ of your comfort zone
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00:01:18,545 --> 00:01:22,047
♪ is this
some kind of a joke? ♪
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♪ will someone
wake me up soon? ♪
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00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:32,224
♪ and tell me this was just
a game we play ♪
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♪ called life
37
00:01:49,509 --> 00:01:50,476
hey.
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00:01:50,510 --> 00:01:53,612
You had a fucking affair?
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Where did you hear that?
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I didn't hear it anywhere.
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00:01:57,016 --> 00:01:59,651
I read it on dad's blog.
What?
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00:01:59,686 --> 00:02:02,621
Cancer, heart attacks,
and now an affair?
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00:02:02,655 --> 00:02:04,022
It's like you guys
are looking for ways
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00:02:04,057 --> 00:02:05,357
to make my life miserable.
Adam, wait one second.
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00:02:05,391 --> 00:02:07,559
No, no, no, no.
With all the lectures
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00:02:07,594 --> 00:02:10,262
and holier-than-thou bullshit,
I'm done listening to you.
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You're a fucking hypocrite.
Adam!
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Wait one minute.
49
00:02:13,233 --> 00:02:15,033
Check this out!
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My latest blog post
got 59 page views.
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That's 30 more
than the last one.
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00:02:21,708 --> 00:02:23,342
Yeah, but your son
is one of them.
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00:02:23,376 --> 00:02:25,210
He knows about my affair.
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00:02:25,245 --> 00:02:28,013
He read about it on your blog!
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Holy shit, Adam saw the blog?
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00:02:30,183 --> 00:02:34,853
It's on the Internet, Paul.
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Everyone can see it.
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00:02:39,125 --> 00:02:40,492
Oh, honey, I'm so sorry.
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00:02:40,527 --> 00:02:44,196
I guess I was thinking about
the people I was writing for,
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00:02:44,230 --> 00:02:45,631
you know, other adults,
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00:02:45,698 --> 00:02:47,366
myself, honestly.
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00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:49,268
I swear,
ever since the operation,
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00:02:49,302 --> 00:02:50,536
I haven't been thinking
straight.
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00:02:50,570 --> 00:02:51,937
You know, yesterday
I made myself a cup of tea.
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00:02:51,971 --> 00:02:53,205
I don't drink tea.
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00:02:53,239 --> 00:02:55,240
And... and I can't seem
to eat enough bananas.
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00:02:55,308 --> 00:02:56,308
I mean, what's that all about?
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00:02:56,342 --> 00:02:57,409
Do you think that they put a...
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00:02:57,443 --> 00:02:58,610
a baboon heart in me
or something?
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00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:00,345
Okay, how are we going
to handle this?
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00:03:00,380 --> 00:03:01,980
How are we going
to explain that to him...
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00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:05,517
that both his parents
had affairs?
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00:03:05,552 --> 00:03:07,085
Well, I didn't get
to my affair yet.
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00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:09,755
Only because yours comes first
chronologically.
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00:03:09,789 --> 00:03:11,323
I mean, I was going
to get to mine,
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00:03:11,357 --> 00:03:13,592
but maybe we should skip it.
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00:03:13,626 --> 00:03:17,262
Why didn't you just skip
all of it?
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00:03:17,297 --> 00:03:19,398
I'm telling my story, Cath.
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00:03:19,432 --> 00:03:20,599
I mean, you know,
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00:03:20,633 --> 00:03:21,934
it's incredibly cathartic
for me.
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00:03:21,968 --> 00:03:23,502
People seem to like hearing
about it.
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You know, how I saw the light
and the details
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of my near-death experience,
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00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:30,442
and I can't really do that
without explaining
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about what came before.
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You know,
like your cancer and...
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00:03:33,379 --> 00:03:34,546
and your Lenny.
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00:03:34,581 --> 00:03:36,715
Oh, so... so I caused
your heart attack?
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00:03:36,749 --> 00:03:38,917
No, life did.
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00:03:38,952 --> 00:03:40,752
And you are part of my life.
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00:03:40,787 --> 00:03:43,222
And by the way, you know,
there are some very nice things
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00:03:43,256 --> 00:03:45,190
about you on the blog, sweetie.
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00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:46,558
Wait.
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00:03:46,593 --> 00:03:48,560
You haven't been reading
my blog.
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00:03:48,595 --> 00:03:50,729
So not the time, Paul.
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00:03:50,763 --> 00:03:52,564
You're right.
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00:03:52,599 --> 00:03:54,366
Why don't I take down that post?
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00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:57,369
Yeah, why don't you take down
that blog post?
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00:04:04,043 --> 00:04:05,010
Hey.
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00:04:05,044 --> 00:04:06,278
Hey.
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00:04:06,312 --> 00:04:07,679
Uh, I was just thinking about,
you know,
102
00:04:07,714 --> 00:04:08,947
taking a snowmobile
safety class.
103
00:04:08,982 --> 00:04:10,082
That might be fun.
104
00:04:10,116 --> 00:04:11,283
Don't you have to have
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00:04:11,317 --> 00:04:13,418
a snowmobile before you
can be safe on one?
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00:04:13,453 --> 00:04:15,187
Maybe I'll get one.
I don't know.
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00:04:15,221 --> 00:04:16,588
You're all into
this Africa stuff.
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00:04:16,623 --> 00:04:18,390
Maybe snowmobiling is
my new hobby.
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This ain't no hobby.
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This is my culture, bitch.
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00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:23,996
B.S.A.?
What is that?
112
00:04:24,030 --> 00:04:25,530
Black student association.
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00:04:25,565 --> 00:04:27,065
The school dropped it
a few years ago
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00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:28,500
due to lack of interest.
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00:04:28,534 --> 00:04:30,602
Can you believe that shit?
I'm starting it back up.
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00:04:30,637 --> 00:04:33,739
Wow, you're really into
this Africa stuff, aren't you?
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00:04:33,806 --> 00:04:35,007
When you spend all your time
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00:04:35,041 --> 00:04:37,342
in a school as white
as a Minnesota winter,
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00:04:37,377 --> 00:04:39,144
it's nice to feel like
you're part of something
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00:04:39,178 --> 00:04:42,814
with people that get
where you're coming from.
121
00:04:42,849 --> 00:04:44,549
Yeah, well, uh, see you later,
Ababuo.
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00:04:44,584 --> 00:04:46,652
You're the first person
to call me that
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00:04:46,686 --> 00:04:49,221
without me having
to kick their ass.
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00:05:11,210 --> 00:05:13,045
Hey.
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00:05:13,079 --> 00:05:15,047
How's the job, working man?
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00:05:15,081 --> 00:05:16,748
It's thankless
and unfulfilling,
127
00:05:16,783 --> 00:05:18,784
but, hey, at least
no one respects me.
128
00:05:18,818 --> 00:05:19,885
What is all this stuff?
129
00:05:19,919 --> 00:05:22,087
You look like
a homeless janitor.
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00:05:22,121 --> 00:05:23,555
These are the tools
of my trade.
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00:05:23,589 --> 00:05:26,058
Dry mop, gum scraper,
vomit powder.
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00:05:26,092 --> 00:05:27,659
Fyi, that's for covering up
the smell,
133
00:05:27,694 --> 00:05:30,128
not making your own
from scratch, and this...
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00:05:30,163 --> 00:05:31,663
this is just found money.
135
00:05:31,698 --> 00:05:34,633
You know, you'd be amazed
at the perfectly wonderful stuff
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00:05:34,667 --> 00:05:36,568
people just throw away
around here.
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00:05:36,602 --> 00:05:37,836
You know, as...
as proud as I am
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00:05:37,870 --> 00:05:39,171
that you...
that you have a job
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00:05:39,205 --> 00:05:41,540
and you're enjoying the
disgusting fruits of your labor,
140
00:05:41,574 --> 00:05:43,175
here's the thing.
You have to get a home phone.
141
00:05:43,209 --> 00:05:44,576
Oh, no.
No, no.
142
00:05:44,610 --> 00:05:45,944
No, I'm getting all
of your work calls at my house.
143
00:05:45,978 --> 00:05:48,213
A phone... it's just...
it's a little too
144
00:05:48,247 --> 00:05:49,214
"on the grid" for me, Cath.
145
00:05:49,248 --> 00:05:51,783
- Sean.
- It's a slippery slope.
146
00:05:51,818 --> 00:05:54,052
You know, today I'm getting
a job and a phone.
147
00:05:54,087 --> 00:05:55,921
Tomorrow I'm on the Internet.
148
00:05:55,955 --> 00:05:58,790
Before you know it, I'm...
I'm e-filing my taxes
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00:05:58,825 --> 00:06:00,792
and tweeting pictures
of my taint
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00:06:00,827 --> 00:06:03,128
to villagers
in ass-ghanistan.
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00:06:03,162 --> 00:06:06,264
How about,
as a thank-you
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00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:09,267
to me for supporting you,
giving you a home,
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00:06:09,302 --> 00:06:11,136
and getting you a job, you do
a little something for me?
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00:06:11,170 --> 00:06:13,372
Something like,
oh, I don't know...
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00:06:13,406 --> 00:06:14,639
Get a phone.
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00:06:14,707 --> 00:06:17,409
I hate it when you treat me
like an immature child.
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00:06:17,443 --> 00:06:20,412
If we weren't at school,
I'd fart in your mouth.
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00:06:22,915 --> 00:06:25,917
Adam.
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00:06:25,952 --> 00:06:26,918
Adam Jamison,
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00:06:26,953 --> 00:06:30,222
I'm talking to you.
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00:06:36,829 --> 00:06:38,163
Is this yours?
Are you...
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00:06:38,197 --> 00:06:40,532
are you going to a Bible group?
- Serious right now?
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00:06:40,566 --> 00:06:42,267
I'm thinking about checking out
a Bible group,
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00:06:42,301 --> 00:06:44,336
and you had sex with a guy
who wasn't dad,
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00:06:44,370 --> 00:06:45,804
and you're judging me?
166
00:06:45,838 --> 00:06:47,172
Maybe you need to find
a Bible, and you can bone up
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00:06:47,206 --> 00:06:49,007
on the fifth commandment,
the "honor thy mother" one.
168
00:06:49,041 --> 00:06:50,909
Yeah, and while I'm at it,
I'll highlight the ones
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00:06:50,943 --> 00:06:54,913
about adultery and lying
for you.
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00:06:54,947 --> 00:06:57,482
Adam, I'm...
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00:06:59,385 --> 00:07:02,354
Hey, Mrs. J.
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00:07:18,037 --> 00:07:19,971
- Oh, hey, Adam.
- What's up?
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00:07:20,006 --> 00:07:21,840
What's up, man?
Are you coming in, or...
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00:07:21,874 --> 00:07:25,444
- uh, you know, I was...
I was thinking about it, but...
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00:07:25,478 --> 00:07:27,245
- oh, yeah.
No, you totally should, man.
176
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,781
It would be good to have another
hockey dude in the group.
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00:07:29,816 --> 00:07:33,084
Look, I was totally
afraid it was going to be all
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00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:34,419
"holy spirit, hallelujah,
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00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,421
"praise Jesus," all that shit.
Oh, yeah?
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00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:37,989
It's actually totally cool.
181
00:07:38,024 --> 00:07:41,660
Awesome, yeah.
182
00:07:53,172 --> 00:07:55,507
Friendly heads-up...
the sandwiches are awesome,
183
00:07:55,541 --> 00:07:57,309
but stay away
from the veggie dip.
184
00:07:57,343 --> 00:07:59,778
This place is lousy
with double-dippers.
185
00:07:59,812 --> 00:08:01,847
So it's like
a veggie and saliva dip?
186
00:08:01,881 --> 00:08:03,615
Totally.
I'm Jesse.
187
00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:05,951
- Adam.
- Come on, guys.
188
00:08:06,018 --> 00:08:07,452
Guys, let's get started.
189
00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:08,620
Hey, everyone.
This is Adam.
190
00:08:08,654 --> 00:08:10,489
Adam, this is everyone.
191
00:08:10,523 --> 00:08:11,723
Hey, what's up?
192
00:08:11,757 --> 00:08:13,058
- What's up, Adam?
- Hey, Adam.
193
00:08:13,092 --> 00:08:14,493
Just caught him double dipping
in the veggie dip.
194
00:08:14,527 --> 00:08:16,094
Ooh.
195
00:08:16,128 --> 00:08:17,262
Nice.
196
00:08:17,296 --> 00:08:20,031
Okay, um, all right.
So, Adam,
197
00:08:20,066 --> 00:08:22,167
what's your story?
198
00:08:22,201 --> 00:08:25,036
Uh, I think everyone
already kind of knows it.
199
00:08:25,071 --> 00:08:26,304
My mom has cancer.
200
00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:28,740
My dad is recovering
from a heart attack.
201
00:08:28,774 --> 00:08:30,842
That and all this school
bullshit, you know?
202
00:08:30,877 --> 00:08:33,512
Sorry.
Oh, no, no.
203
00:08:33,546 --> 00:08:35,380
It's fine, man.
I mean, I have a feeling
204
00:08:35,414 --> 00:08:37,682
that when Jesus was getting
nailed to the cross,
205
00:08:37,717 --> 00:08:39,017
he may have let
a few "motherfuckers" fly.
206
00:08:39,051 --> 00:08:40,852
You know?
207
00:08:40,887 --> 00:08:43,121
But, um, no.
It's good to have you, Adam.
208
00:08:43,155 --> 00:08:45,056
You know, this is just a place
where you can be yourself.
209
00:08:45,091 --> 00:08:47,392
You can share your problems.
You can vent.
210
00:08:47,426 --> 00:08:48,927
You can scream if you want to.
211
00:08:48,961 --> 00:08:50,395
I mean, we all have our own
crazy stuff going on, right?
212
00:08:50,429 --> 00:08:52,430
- Mm-hmm.
- And, uh...
213
00:08:52,465 --> 00:08:54,499
I mean, we're just here
to find our sanity.
214
00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,768
You know? Or...
or our higher power
215
00:08:56,802 --> 00:08:59,804
or that calm among the chaos.
216
00:08:59,872 --> 00:09:01,206
So there's just...
there's no judgments.
217
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:03,208
Sweet.
218
00:09:03,242 --> 00:09:05,043
We do occasionally make fun
of Morgan's hair,
219
00:09:05,077 --> 00:09:06,044
but, I mean, besides that,
220
00:09:06,078 --> 00:09:07,178
nothing.
221
00:09:10,249 --> 00:09:12,551
Get in there.
222
00:09:17,490 --> 00:09:19,157
Where the hell
did that come from?
223
00:09:19,191 --> 00:09:20,825
Oh, there's a storage closet
224
00:09:20,860 --> 00:09:22,294
at the school
full of this crap.
225
00:09:22,328 --> 00:09:23,762
Cathy wants me on the grid,
226
00:09:23,796 --> 00:09:26,898
I will do it my way.
227
00:09:26,933 --> 00:09:29,901
Ah, yes, the sound
of my soul dying a little bit.
228
00:09:29,936 --> 00:09:32,437
Hey, which of these says
229
00:09:32,471 --> 00:09:34,439
"black power"?
230
00:09:34,473 --> 00:09:36,608
Um, well,
they all do actually.
231
00:09:36,642 --> 00:09:39,277
Here, you just, uh...
you just have to learn
232
00:09:39,312 --> 00:09:41,212
how to wrap these the right way.
233
00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:43,281
Come here.
Sit down.
234
00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:44,816
Are you serious right now?
235
00:09:44,850 --> 00:09:47,319
You know how to wrap
an African head scarf?
236
00:09:47,353 --> 00:09:51,556
Yeah, I, uh... I dated
a Nigerian chick in college,
237
00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:52,824
and we made a deal.
238
00:09:52,858 --> 00:09:54,893
If I learned
how to tie her scarf,
239
00:09:54,927 --> 00:09:57,696
she would go full bush,
no trimming.
240
00:09:58,965 --> 00:10:01,032
Ugh, you see,
here's my problem.
241
00:10:01,067 --> 00:10:02,734
No one has this number yet.
242
00:10:02,768 --> 00:10:05,270
Fucking telemarketers.
243
00:10:05,304 --> 00:10:06,838
Hello.
244
00:10:06,872 --> 00:10:11,009
No.
There's no Willy here.
245
00:10:11,043 --> 00:10:14,713
Total pain in the ass.
246
00:10:18,985 --> 00:10:20,085
Hello?
247
00:10:20,152 --> 00:10:23,822
No. No, buddy.
You got the wrong number.
248
00:10:23,856 --> 00:10:30,762
No, this isn't Willy.
249
00:10:33,799 --> 00:10:36,267
- What?
- Suck my cock.
250
00:10:36,302 --> 00:10:39,137
Come on, Willy,
you know you want to.
251
00:10:39,171 --> 00:10:41,172
You got a naughty-ass phone.
252
00:10:41,207 --> 00:10:43,575
Probably just
some stupid kids.
253
00:10:43,609 --> 00:10:47,145
All right, Ababuo,
there you go.
254
00:10:47,179 --> 00:10:48,279
What do you think?
255
00:10:48,314 --> 00:10:51,016
Damn, dude.
This is awesome.
256
00:10:51,050 --> 00:10:53,718
I hope your Nigerian girlfriend
lived up to her end of the deal.
257
00:10:53,786 --> 00:10:55,153
Oh, yeah.
258
00:10:55,187 --> 00:10:57,789
It was like she was smuggling
Diana Ross in her panties.
259
00:10:57,823 --> 00:11:00,792
Ugh.
260
00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:11,903
I want you to tell Adam
that you had an affair.
261
00:11:11,937 --> 00:11:13,738
What?
Why, honey?
262
00:11:13,773 --> 00:11:15,840
I thought we agreed
that it was better
263
00:11:15,875 --> 00:11:17,175
if Adam didn't know
that kind of stuff.
264
00:11:17,209 --> 00:11:19,277
You're the one who brought us
down this road.
265
00:11:19,311 --> 00:11:21,179
He has not spoken to me
since he found out my affair,
266
00:11:21,213 --> 00:11:22,714
and I am tired
of being the bad guy.
267
00:11:22,748 --> 00:11:26,451
He's on his way to school,
so tell him before he leaves.
268
00:11:26,485 --> 00:11:29,254
Adam, your father has something
he wants to tell you.
269
00:11:29,288 --> 00:11:30,889
- Hey, buddy.
- Hey.
270
00:11:30,923 --> 00:11:33,658
Um, here's the deal.
271
00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:36,561
Uh, it was wrong of me to...
272
00:11:36,595 --> 00:11:39,030
Post on my blog
about your mother's affair.
273
00:11:39,065 --> 00:11:41,800
She's angry, and rightfully so.
274
00:11:41,834 --> 00:11:44,869
But we have talked about it,
and we've moved on.
275
00:11:44,904 --> 00:11:47,005
Incidentally, new house rule:
276
00:11:47,039 --> 00:11:48,239
Nothing personal
goes in the blog
277
00:11:48,274 --> 00:11:52,610
without prior family approval.
278
00:11:52,645 --> 00:11:55,647
And...
279
00:11:55,681 --> 00:11:58,750
And she is not the only one
who had an affair.
280
00:11:58,784 --> 00:12:02,420
I cheated too.
281
00:12:02,455 --> 00:12:03,555
Of course.
Of course.
282
00:12:03,589 --> 00:12:05,657
Why not?
Why not?
283
00:12:05,691 --> 00:12:08,993
I know, I know, but it was
a crazy, misguided reaction.
284
00:12:09,028 --> 00:12:12,030
Okay? Sort of a sexual
quid pro quo.
285
00:12:12,064 --> 00:12:14,466
I don't know what all this
sudden honesty is about, okay?
286
00:12:14,500 --> 00:12:15,867
I really don't.
287
00:12:15,901 --> 00:12:17,569
But you want my honesty?
288
00:12:17,603 --> 00:12:19,471
I don't want to know this shit.
289
00:12:19,505 --> 00:12:22,006
- Adam.
- What, mom? What?
290
00:12:22,074 --> 00:12:23,074
Do you wanna hug it out?
291
00:12:23,109 --> 00:12:24,109
Yeah, we should totally
hug it out.
292
00:12:24,143 --> 00:12:25,477
Come here.
Let's hug it out.
293
00:12:25,511 --> 00:12:26,611
Oh, yeah, everything's better.
294
00:12:26,645 --> 00:12:28,747
Everything's better.
I feel great.
295
00:12:28,781 --> 00:12:31,249
I feel great.
Do you guys feel great?
296
00:12:31,283 --> 00:12:34,285
God.
297
00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:41,960
Bring it.
298
00:12:41,994 --> 00:12:43,695
Bring it.
299
00:12:43,729 --> 00:12:45,764
Ha, ha!
300
00:12:46,832 --> 00:12:48,466
Okay.
301
00:12:48,501 --> 00:12:50,401
Let me give you some props,
'cause you are the first woman
302
00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:52,570
who beat me
since Sturgis in 2005.
303
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:53,938
And that bitch cheated,
I'm telling you.
304
00:12:53,973 --> 00:12:56,975
You just chalk it up
to anger.
305
00:12:57,009 --> 00:12:59,377
It's the steroid
of the common folk.
306
00:13:00,513 --> 00:13:02,413
Yo, Kirby, Alexis' next round
307
00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:03,581
is on me.
308
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:05,683
Aww.
309
00:13:05,718 --> 00:13:08,620
You know, I bet you'd be good
at arm wrestling.
310
00:13:08,654 --> 00:13:12,557
All that artwork adds an added
element of intimidation.
311
00:13:12,591 --> 00:13:14,425
You like my memoirs?
312
00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:18,196
Oh. Oh, I love that you used
the word "memoirs."
313
00:13:18,230 --> 00:13:21,566
Why do people get tattoos?
314
00:13:21,600 --> 00:13:23,968
Well, I'm not authorized
to speak for people,
315
00:13:24,003 --> 00:13:26,104
but every one I got
before I was 20
316
00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:27,138
was to piss my mother off.
317
00:13:27,173 --> 00:13:29,140
Did it work?
318
00:13:29,175 --> 00:13:31,176
I guess not.
She still calls me every Sunday.
319
00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:35,647
Ooh. Ooh.
320
00:13:35,681 --> 00:13:37,849
Oh, wow, what is that one?
321
00:13:37,883 --> 00:13:39,350
It's supposed to be
a grim reaper,
322
00:13:39,385 --> 00:13:40,685
but the guy I shared
a cell with
323
00:13:40,719 --> 00:13:42,520
was a little light
on proper tattoo supplies,
324
00:13:42,555 --> 00:13:45,557
so it kinda looks like a clown
with a droopy penis.
325
00:13:45,591 --> 00:13:47,225
Oh, you were in prison.
326
00:13:47,259 --> 00:13:49,828
My mother warned me
about guys like you.
327
00:13:50,896 --> 00:13:53,198
Relax. I just robbed
a liquor store.
328
00:13:53,232 --> 00:13:55,900
Oh, see?
329
00:13:55,935 --> 00:13:58,469
That almost makes you
sound soft.
330
00:13:58,504 --> 00:13:59,804
You know, you can get
those things removed now.
331
00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:01,606
Why would I want to do that?
332
00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:03,775
I'm proud of 'em.
333
00:14:03,809 --> 00:14:06,845
It's my story.
334
00:14:06,879 --> 00:14:09,881
Yeah.
335
00:14:15,554 --> 00:14:16,688
I gotta get out of here.
336
00:14:16,722 --> 00:14:19,023
- Where you going?
- I gotta go to school.
337
00:14:19,058 --> 00:14:21,893
School?
338
00:14:21,927 --> 00:14:24,095
Yeah.
339
00:14:24,129 --> 00:14:27,198
Flight school, remember?
340
00:14:27,233 --> 00:14:28,600
Airplane driving.
341
00:14:28,634 --> 00:14:31,135
Yeah, I'm not sure
you're okay to drive.
342
00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:33,238
Oh, no, no, no.
I'm fine.
343
00:14:33,272 --> 00:14:34,639
I'm okay, you know,
'cause I'm...
344
00:14:34,673 --> 00:14:37,075
I'm not driving... I'm not driving
the actual planes.
345
00:14:37,109 --> 00:14:38,409
Just the simulator.
346
00:14:38,444 --> 00:14:39,711
You don't have to be sober
to do that.
347
00:14:39,745 --> 00:14:43,047
Right, but you do have to be
sober to drive a car.
348
00:14:43,082 --> 00:14:46,885
Where you going, Alexis?
I can drop you off.
349
00:14:46,919 --> 00:14:49,120
About a block
away from west hill high.
350
00:14:49,154 --> 00:14:50,221
You know where that is?
351
00:14:50,256 --> 00:14:51,356
Let's ride.
352
00:14:52,791 --> 00:14:54,125
♪ I miss you
353
00:14:54,159 --> 00:14:56,060
♪ yeah, I miss you
354
00:14:56,095 --> 00:14:59,764
come on, girl.
355
00:14:59,798 --> 00:15:01,499
- So this is it, huh?
- Sure is.
356
00:15:01,533 --> 00:15:02,667
This is your hog?
357
00:15:02,701 --> 00:15:04,636
Oh, she's no hog.
358
00:15:04,670 --> 00:15:06,671
Looks a little tiny
for a big ol' hog.
359
00:15:06,705 --> 00:15:08,573
Well, you know, I like
something that fits snug
360
00:15:08,607 --> 00:15:10,308
under my ass.
361
00:15:10,342 --> 00:15:11,809
All right, you ready?
362
00:15:11,844 --> 00:15:12,911
Yeah. Hang on.
363
00:15:12,945 --> 00:15:15,713
♪ Photograph
364
00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:17,282
♪ is all I have
365
00:15:17,316 --> 00:15:19,384
♪ photograph
366
00:15:19,418 --> 00:15:21,085
♪ is all I have
367
00:15:21,120 --> 00:15:22,921
♪ photograph
368
00:15:22,955 --> 00:15:25,089
♪ is all I have of you ♪
369
00:15:25,124 --> 00:15:26,791
all right, hang on.
370
00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:32,263
Whoo!
371
00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:41,139
Hey, what's up,
my African queen?
372
00:15:41,173 --> 00:15:42,573
Oh, nothing.
373
00:15:42,608 --> 00:15:44,809
I just spent the last two days
bustin' my ass,
374
00:15:44,877 --> 00:15:47,178
hanging up flyers and telling
people about this whole
375
00:15:47,212 --> 00:15:48,379
black student association,
376
00:15:48,414 --> 00:15:50,815
and this is the response I get.
377
00:15:50,849 --> 00:15:52,517
You know, I know that there
aren't a whole lot
378
00:15:52,551 --> 00:15:53,818
of black kids at this school,
379
00:15:53,886 --> 00:15:56,521
but I sure as hell thought
that of the 13 black kids
380
00:15:56,555 --> 00:15:58,489
that do go here,
that at least half of them
381
00:15:58,524 --> 00:16:01,526
would have showed
some goddamn interest.
382
00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:04,495
Total waste of time.
383
00:16:04,530 --> 00:16:06,030
So what,
you're just gonna quit?
384
00:16:06,098 --> 00:16:07,332
After one day?
385
00:16:07,366 --> 00:16:10,868
To me, that kind of laziness
and lack of ambition
386
00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:12,337
just feeds a very overused
387
00:16:12,371 --> 00:16:15,306
and very cliche
black stereotype.
388
00:16:15,341 --> 00:16:16,674
Of course, it's easy
for me to say.
389
00:16:16,709 --> 00:16:19,143
I'm a white man reaping
all the glorious benefits
390
00:16:19,178 --> 00:16:22,580
of a system skewed in my favor.
391
00:16:22,614 --> 00:16:25,116
As-salaam-alaikum.
392
00:16:30,522 --> 00:16:31,656
Oh.
393
00:16:31,690 --> 00:16:33,358
Uh, excuse me.
394
00:16:33,392 --> 00:16:34,859
Ladies, a moment.
395
00:16:34,893 --> 00:16:36,561
Um, yeah, I'm a janitor.
396
00:16:36,595 --> 00:16:38,896
My entire job revolves
around filth and waste,
397
00:16:38,931 --> 00:16:40,164
and I accept that.
398
00:16:40,199 --> 00:16:42,700
But, you know, I have to vent
just for a second.
399
00:16:42,735 --> 00:16:45,136
I love your gender,
but as teenagers,
400
00:16:45,170 --> 00:16:46,671
you disgust me,
401
00:16:46,705 --> 00:16:49,874
with your chipped nail Polish
all over the floor in there,
402
00:16:49,908 --> 00:16:52,176
your tampons jammed
in the toilets.
403
00:16:52,211 --> 00:16:54,746
And although you guys
might think it's cute,
404
00:16:54,780 --> 00:16:56,214
those little lipstick kisses
you leave
405
00:16:56,248 --> 00:16:57,582
on the mirror in there
406
00:16:57,616 --> 00:17:00,451
are a pain
in my minimum-wage ass.
407
00:17:00,486 --> 00:17:01,452
Weirdo.
408
00:17:01,487 --> 00:17:02,520
Attention.
409
00:17:02,554 --> 00:17:03,588
I want to urge
my fellow black students
410
00:17:03,622 --> 00:17:05,056
to join me
in the newly reestablished
411
00:17:05,090 --> 00:17:06,557
black student association.
412
00:17:06,592 --> 00:17:07,959
It's an opportunity...
Miss Jackson!
413
00:17:07,993 --> 00:17:10,028
Step away from that microphone
right now.
414
00:17:10,062 --> 00:17:11,963
Okay, I got the principal
all up in my grill.
415
00:17:11,997 --> 00:17:14,098
But just come and find me.
416
00:17:14,133 --> 00:17:15,533
- Give me that microphone.
- Ugh, come on, people.
417
00:17:15,567 --> 00:17:17,035
Have some pride!
418
00:17:17,069 --> 00:17:19,337
Show this school that we're
more than just...
419
00:17:19,371 --> 00:17:20,872
God damn it, we are the 99%!
420
00:17:20,906 --> 00:17:23,408
But really we're the 5%.
421
00:17:23,442 --> 00:17:24,442
This is why I need you.
422
00:17:24,476 --> 00:17:27,178
5%! 5%!
423
00:17:27,212 --> 00:17:29,280
Tell your story
in detention, Andrea.
424
00:17:29,314 --> 00:17:31,816
It's Ababuo, damn it.
425
00:17:31,850 --> 00:17:34,886
Go.
426
00:17:58,744 --> 00:18:00,378
I want to talk to you.
427
00:18:00,412 --> 00:18:01,946
You might want to talk
to a mirror first.
428
00:18:01,980 --> 00:18:04,282
You look like
a freakin' crazy woman.
429
00:18:04,316 --> 00:18:05,883
Well, look, I don't
give a shit what I look like.
430
00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:09,053
Look, I am tired
of you shutting me out.
431
00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:12,824
Mom.
432
00:18:12,858 --> 00:18:15,560
I had an affair.
433
00:18:15,627 --> 00:18:17,862
It was last summer.
It lasted a few weeks.
434
00:18:17,896 --> 00:18:19,063
It was with Lenny, the painter.
435
00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:21,032
Okay, yeah.
Yeah, that's great.
436
00:18:21,066 --> 00:18:22,033
Feel better?
437
00:18:22,067 --> 00:18:23,234
Maybe when I'm done.
438
00:18:23,268 --> 00:18:25,269
'Cause now that I have
your attention,
439
00:18:25,304 --> 00:18:26,237
I'm gonna tell you everything.
440
00:18:26,271 --> 00:18:28,272
I've done drugs.
441
00:18:28,307 --> 00:18:30,475
When I was 17, I smoked pot
for the very first time.
442
00:18:30,509 --> 00:18:32,910
And when I was 19,
I was arrested
443
00:18:32,945 --> 00:18:34,645
for peeing in a public park.
444
00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:36,781
And I've shoplifted.
445
00:18:36,815 --> 00:18:38,282
There was this great pair
of guess jeans.
446
00:18:38,317 --> 00:18:40,184
They were all the rage.
Mom. Stop!
447
00:18:40,219 --> 00:18:42,353
I got so drunk
at my college orientation
448
00:18:42,387 --> 00:18:43,955
that they had to pump
my stomach,
449
00:18:43,989 --> 00:18:46,691
and that was after...
450
00:18:46,725 --> 00:18:48,960
After my friends,
they found me passed out
451
00:18:48,994 --> 00:18:50,261
in this guy's bedroom,
452
00:18:50,295 --> 00:18:51,362
and I-I... for the life of me,
453
00:18:51,396 --> 00:18:52,730
I could not find my bra,
454
00:18:52,764 --> 00:18:55,333
and that prick,
he gave me scabies.
455
00:18:55,367 --> 00:18:57,034
And I was so stressed out
456
00:18:57,069 --> 00:18:58,369
from having a rash down there
457
00:18:58,403 --> 00:18:59,470
that I missed my period.
458
00:18:59,505 --> 00:19:00,571
I totally thought
I was pregnant.
459
00:19:00,606 --> 00:19:04,575
Just fucking shut up!
460
00:19:04,610 --> 00:19:07,645
I've made mistakes.
461
00:19:07,679 --> 00:19:10,548
I'm gonna make more.
462
00:19:10,582 --> 00:19:13,484
What's going on in here?
463
00:19:20,726 --> 00:19:24,195
All of you are gonna make
a shitload of mistakes too.
464
00:19:24,229 --> 00:19:26,297
It's not fucking funny!
465
00:19:26,331 --> 00:19:29,400
Dude, it's totally funny.
466
00:19:29,434 --> 00:19:31,636
Okay, Adam, we all know
you're going through a lot,
467
00:19:31,670 --> 00:19:32,770
but you need to calm down.
468
00:19:32,804 --> 00:19:34,472
Fuck off, Ingvoll.
469
00:19:34,506 --> 00:19:37,842
You just got detention.
470
00:19:37,876 --> 00:19:39,210
And Mrs. Jamison...
471
00:19:39,244 --> 00:19:42,213
- fuck off, Ingvoll.
472
00:19:55,961 --> 00:19:57,495
What are you doing in here?
473
00:19:57,529 --> 00:20:00,598
Rather not talk about it.
474
00:20:00,632 --> 00:20:03,000
Heard you over the intercom.
475
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:04,902
You have a lovely
speaking voice.
476
00:20:04,937 --> 00:20:07,038
Shut the fuck up.
477
00:20:07,072 --> 00:20:09,574
Principal Schuler went crazy.
478
00:20:09,608 --> 00:20:10,775
I had to do something.
479
00:20:10,809 --> 00:20:12,610
I have no idea how
to get people interested
480
00:20:12,644 --> 00:20:13,945
in my black student group.
481
00:20:13,979 --> 00:20:16,180
I'll join, if it helps.
482
00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:18,749
I'm pretty sure having
a white kid in the group
483
00:20:18,784 --> 00:20:21,852
would defeat the purpose.
484
00:20:21,887 --> 00:20:23,187
These gentlemen
will be joining you
485
00:20:23,222 --> 00:20:25,022
for the next six weeks.
486
00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:30,228
Oh, hell no.
487
00:20:30,262 --> 00:20:33,130
Look at you fools.
488
00:20:33,165 --> 00:20:35,233
Do you think this is a joke?
489
00:20:35,267 --> 00:20:37,268
This is exactly where
people expect you to be.
490
00:20:37,302 --> 00:20:39,570
Don't be where people
expect you to be.
491
00:20:39,605 --> 00:20:40,871
Miss Jackson.
492
00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:42,006
Miss Schuler, you can give me
493
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:43,241
another detention or whatever,
494
00:20:43,275 --> 00:20:45,409
but right now,
I need to say some shit.
495
00:20:45,444 --> 00:20:47,144
Now, I posted signs.
496
00:20:47,179 --> 00:20:49,814
I've asked y'all asses nicely.
497
00:20:49,848 --> 00:20:51,983
I even got over the intercom
498
00:20:52,017 --> 00:20:54,285
and screamed it
and got in detention for it.
499
00:20:54,319 --> 00:20:55,720
But I can't get through to you.
500
00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:57,288
So guess what.
501
00:20:57,322 --> 00:20:58,889
We're gonna have
a group meeting right now.
502
00:20:58,924 --> 00:21:00,925
We're practically
a quorum anyway.
503
00:21:00,959 --> 00:21:03,628
So welcome to
the black student association.
504
00:21:03,662 --> 00:21:05,396
And I've changed
the name of the group.
505
00:21:05,430 --> 00:21:06,764
It's a.F.R.O...
506
00:21:06,798 --> 00:21:08,899
africans for rediscovering
ourselves.
507
00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:11,435
Do I have y'all attention?
508
00:21:11,470 --> 00:21:12,837
This is not a meeting.
509
00:21:12,871 --> 00:21:14,272
This is detention.
510
00:21:14,306 --> 00:21:15,940
Sit down, Andrea.
511
00:21:16,008 --> 00:21:19,810
It's Ababuo.
512
00:21:19,845 --> 00:21:23,014
Fist up, fools!
513
00:21:34,893 --> 00:21:36,460
What? Shit. What?
514
00:21:36,495 --> 00:21:39,030
Who the fuck
are you looking for?
515
00:21:39,064 --> 00:21:41,499
Hopefully, you're the fuck
I'm looking for.
516
00:21:41,533 --> 00:21:43,267
Who is this?
517
00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:44,535
Come on, Willy.
518
00:21:44,569 --> 00:21:47,038
Don't act like
you don't remember me.
519
00:21:47,072 --> 00:21:49,707
Uh, well,
could you remind me?
520
00:21:49,741 --> 00:21:52,143
It's me, Damien, silly Willy.
521
00:21:52,177 --> 00:21:53,444
Where have you been?
522
00:21:53,478 --> 00:21:55,246
Your phone number has been
disconnected for weeks.
523
00:21:55,280 --> 00:21:57,848
I can't stand
being Willy-deprived.
524
00:21:57,883 --> 00:22:00,251
And you know I don't pay
$4.99 a minute
525
00:22:00,285 --> 00:22:02,019
to just have anyone
lick my balls.
526
00:22:02,054 --> 00:22:04,955
Um, well, the, um,
527
00:22:04,990 --> 00:22:08,159
the business had some, uh,
some issues.
528
00:22:08,193 --> 00:22:12,263
But the... the phone is now
back up and...
529
00:22:12,297 --> 00:22:13,331
and running.
530
00:22:13,365 --> 00:22:14,865
Thank God!
531
00:22:14,900 --> 00:22:16,667
Listen, I'm gonna give you
my new credit card number.
532
00:22:16,702 --> 00:22:18,703
Is that okay?
533
00:22:18,737 --> 00:22:21,305
Yeah, it's, uh...
it's easier on my end.
534
00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:23,908
Okay, but I hope you'll go
anything but easy
535
00:22:23,942 --> 00:22:25,576
on my end.
536
00:22:27,112 --> 00:22:28,346
Clever, Damien.
537
00:22:28,380 --> 00:22:31,115
Um, so let's, uh,
let's do this.
538
00:22:31,149 --> 00:22:34,085
Will that be visa
or American express?
539
00:22:36,722 --> 00:22:38,589
Uh-huh.
540
00:22:38,623 --> 00:22:41,692
Yeah. Sexy.
541
00:22:41,727 --> 00:22:44,595
I understand that things
at home are stressful.
542
00:22:44,629 --> 00:22:45,830
I get that.
543
00:22:45,864 --> 00:22:48,299
But what am I supposed to do?
544
00:22:48,333 --> 00:22:49,600
That's why they pay you
the big bucks, Connie.
545
00:22:49,634 --> 00:22:51,736
To take care of shit like this.
546
00:22:51,770 --> 00:22:53,804
This is not funny, Cathy.
547
00:22:53,839 --> 00:22:56,073
Do you realize
you are the third person
548
00:22:56,108 --> 00:22:58,943
from your house
in my office today?
549
00:22:58,977 --> 00:23:01,212
You are a teacher.
550
00:23:01,246 --> 00:23:03,314
Certain rules
need to be followed.
551
00:23:03,348 --> 00:23:05,516
Certain behavior is expected.
552
00:23:05,550 --> 00:23:07,785
And today's behavior
was not it.
553
00:23:07,819 --> 00:23:11,522
You know, I'm not
particularly proud of myself,
554
00:23:11,556 --> 00:23:13,290
but I am an adult,
so you can stop
555
00:23:13,325 --> 00:23:15,292
wagging your finger at me.
556
00:23:15,327 --> 00:23:16,861
Psh.
557
00:23:16,895 --> 00:23:18,262
Is that...
558
00:23:18,330 --> 00:23:21,866
is that alcohol on your breath?
559
00:23:21,900 --> 00:23:23,367
Excuse me?
560
00:23:23,402 --> 00:23:26,137
You have to give me
a little more credit, Connie.
561
00:23:26,171 --> 00:23:28,272
For your information,
what you're smelling
562
00:23:28,306 --> 00:23:32,676
is medicine that I'm on
for my clinical trial.
563
00:23:32,744 --> 00:23:34,245
Medicine.
564
00:23:34,279 --> 00:23:36,147
You have got to help me out
here, Cathy.
565
00:23:36,181 --> 00:23:38,749
I think the school
has been very good
566
00:23:38,784 --> 00:23:41,218
about giving you
the time and space you need
567
00:23:41,253 --> 00:23:42,586
to deal with your illness.
568
00:23:42,621 --> 00:23:47,358
I only ask for a little
professionalism in return.
569
00:23:51,496 --> 00:23:52,897
So you want...
570
00:23:52,931 --> 00:23:56,867
Professionalism.
571
00:23:56,902 --> 00:23:59,370
Professional...
572
00:23:59,404 --> 00:24:03,407
Professionalism.
573
00:24:03,442 --> 00:24:06,143
He's wearing a tie.
574
00:24:06,178 --> 00:24:07,778
Is that professional enough
for ya?
575
00:24:15,287 --> 00:24:18,689
♪ I
576
00:24:18,723 --> 00:24:21,525
♪ think you should know
577
00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:22,593
♪ that I
578
00:24:22,627 --> 00:24:24,495
what are you doing here?
579
00:24:24,529 --> 00:24:25,996
I work here, remember?
580
00:24:26,031 --> 00:24:27,898
No, I mean why did Adam
call me for a ride
581
00:24:27,933 --> 00:24:29,333
if... if you were here?
582
00:24:29,401 --> 00:24:30,901
Oh, I'm afraid
he doesn't want
583
00:24:30,936 --> 00:24:33,304
to have anything
to do with me right now.
584
00:24:33,338 --> 00:24:37,808
Why? What happened?
585
00:24:37,843 --> 00:24:38,909
I told him my story.
586
00:24:38,944 --> 00:24:40,177
I told him everything.
587
00:24:40,212 --> 00:24:43,047
I think it was
the right thing to do.
588
00:24:43,081 --> 00:24:46,016
The way I did it
was questionable.
589
00:24:49,421 --> 00:24:50,721
Honey, have you been drinking?
590
00:24:50,755 --> 00:24:52,356
I have.
591
00:24:52,390 --> 00:24:55,092
And I will probably be drinking
more later.
592
00:24:55,126 --> 00:24:56,193
I'll see you at home.
593
00:24:56,228 --> 00:25:02,766
♪ I can't let you go
594
00:25:02,801 --> 00:25:05,803
♪ tonight.
595
00:25:05,837 --> 00:25:08,639
♪ I can't be alone
596
00:25:08,673 --> 00:25:10,574
look, don't...
I was just...
597
00:25:10,609 --> 00:25:13,077
- wasting a perfectly
good cigarette?
598
00:25:13,111 --> 00:25:14,345
You got another one I can bum?
599
00:25:14,379 --> 00:25:17,014
Sure.
600
00:25:17,048 --> 00:25:20,317
♪ That you
601
00:25:20,352 --> 00:25:23,153
♪ don't love me that way
602
00:25:23,188 --> 00:25:26,657
♪ tonight
603
00:25:26,691 --> 00:25:27,758
huh.
604
00:25:27,792 --> 00:25:29,894
♪ I'll be just like
605
00:25:29,928 --> 00:25:32,897
♪ your shadow
606
00:25:32,931 --> 00:25:36,667
♪ your shadow
607
00:25:36,701 --> 00:25:40,037
♪ your shadow
608
00:25:40,071 --> 00:25:43,307
♪ your shadow
609
00:25:43,341 --> 00:25:44,975
all set.
Want to see it?
610
00:25:45,010 --> 00:25:47,745
Mmhmm.
611
00:25:47,779 --> 00:25:50,781
♪ It's been so long
612
00:25:50,815 --> 00:25:53,951
♪ and you
613
00:25:53,985 --> 00:25:55,119
so what do you think, Alexis?
614
00:25:55,153 --> 00:25:58,122
You like it?
615
00:25:58,156 --> 00:26:00,224
♪ Tonight.
616
00:26:00,258 --> 00:26:01,892
I love it.
617
00:26:01,927 --> 00:26:03,327
♪ I'll be just like
618
00:26:03,361 --> 00:26:06,297
♪ your shadow
40393
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