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http:
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http:/
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http://
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http://h
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http://hi
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http://hiq
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http://hiqv
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http://hiqve
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http://hiqve.
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http://hiqve.c
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http://hiqve.co
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http://hiqve.com
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http://hiqve.com/
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http://hiqve.com/
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Oh, Wanda.
20
00:00:16,643 --> 00:00:18,019
Oh, Derek.
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00:00:19,437 --> 00:00:21,147
Oh, Wanda.
22
00:00:21,189 --> 00:00:22,524
Yes, Derek?
23
00:00:23,650 --> 00:00:26,402
You're not just my
next-door neighbor.
24
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You're also the love of my life.
25
00:00:29,906 --> 00:00:33,034
Derek, I, too, have strong
feelings of love for you.
26
00:00:35,871 --> 00:00:38,915
But I have to give back
this promise ball and chain.
27
00:00:38,957 --> 00:00:41,459
I must leave
Point Upon The Place
28
00:00:41,501 --> 00:00:44,671
and explore the world with my
trusty cat named Sir Bonkers.
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00:00:46,172 --> 00:00:47,215
No.
30
00:00:48,424 --> 00:00:49,718
I'll never let you go.
31
00:00:52,470 --> 00:00:53,638
You can't make me stay.
32
00:00:53,680 --> 00:00:54,973
Oh, no?
33
00:00:56,098 --> 00:00:57,368
Well, what if
I told you that I've
34
00:00:57,392 --> 00:00:58,852
run over the cat
named Sir Bonkers
35
00:00:58,894 --> 00:01:01,062
and the cat named Sir Bonkers
is no more?
36
00:01:01,103 --> 00:01:03,565
Now submit and be my wife!
37
00:01:06,026 --> 00:01:09,779
Derek, once you were
a kind, peaceful man.
38
00:01:09,821 --> 00:01:11,990
But love has made you wicked.
39
00:01:13,950 --> 00:01:15,785
Oh, I am wicked.
40
00:01:16,912 --> 00:01:18,872
And until you
agree to be my wife,
41
00:01:18,914 --> 00:01:22,166
I will scour the earth in search
of cats named Sir Bonkers,
42
00:01:22,208 --> 00:01:23,960
and I will kill them all!
43
00:01:24,002 --> 00:01:26,128
Or, at very least,
spray them with water,
44
00:01:26,170 --> 00:01:28,339
which everyone knows they hate.
45
00:01:39,308 --> 00:01:42,771
I can't believe Donna would
publish this in the school paper.
46
00:01:42,812 --> 00:01:44,564
I know. This could be
in Reader's Digest.
47
00:01:44,606 --> 00:01:46,190
It's that good.
48
00:01:48,526 --> 00:01:50,028
Oh, this is
the worst short story
49
00:01:50,070 --> 00:01:53,114
by an ex-girlfriend
in the school newspaper ever.
50
00:01:55,617 --> 00:01:57,660
♪ Hanging out
51
00:01:59,662 --> 00:02:01,497
♪ Down the street
52
00:02:02,958 --> 00:02:04,876
♪ The same old thing
53
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♪ We did last week
54
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♪ Not a thing to do
55
00:02:14,094 --> 00:02:17,764
♪ But talk to you
56
00:02:17,806 --> 00:02:19,682
♪ We're all all right
57
00:02:19,724 --> 00:02:21,977
♪ We're all all right ♪
58
00:02:22,018 --> 00:02:24,145
Hello, Wisconsin!
59
00:02:32,904 --> 00:02:34,823
Well, if it isn't
Playboy reading,
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00:02:34,864 --> 00:02:37,075
panty-loving, cat-killing Derek.
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00:02:38,242 --> 00:02:40,703
I know.
How could Donna write this?
62
00:02:40,745 --> 00:02:42,246
Why are you upset?
63
00:02:42,288 --> 00:02:44,833
It's this Derek guy
who really gets the shaft.
64
00:02:46,542 --> 00:02:48,168
Fez, I am Derek.
65
00:02:49,211 --> 00:02:51,923
Everything always
has to be about you.
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00:02:52,966 --> 00:02:54,592
Fez, man, think about it.
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00:02:54,634 --> 00:02:58,220
Eric killed Donna's cat.
Derek killed Wanda's cat.
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00:02:58,262 --> 00:03:01,141
Donna found panties
in Eric's Vista Cruiser.
69
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:04,477
Wanda found a chastity belt
in Derek's Vista Carriage.
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00:03:07,313 --> 00:03:08,731
Hey, you guys,
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00:03:08,773 --> 00:03:11,317
you know what goes really
good with a bad short story?
72
00:03:11,359 --> 00:03:12,485
Pinball!
73
00:03:13,695 --> 00:03:15,071
No. I hate pinball.
74
00:03:15,113 --> 00:03:16,405
Hate it or love it?
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00:03:18,116 --> 00:03:19,575
Hate it.
76
00:03:19,617 --> 00:03:20,910
Or love it?
77
00:03:23,705 --> 00:03:26,166
Come on, guys. I'm gonna
buy a $50 stake in this machine,
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00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:28,001
so let's play so I
can make some money.
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00:03:29,794 --> 00:03:31,004
Where'd you get $50?
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00:03:31,046 --> 00:03:32,212
From Jackie.
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00:03:33,715 --> 00:03:35,383
Hey, Jackie.
Uh, can I borrow $50?
82
00:03:37,135 --> 00:03:38,386
For what?
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00:03:38,427 --> 00:03:39,427
To buy a dress for you.
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00:03:40,555 --> 00:03:41,556
Okay.
85
00:03:45,101 --> 00:03:46,227
Wait a minute.
86
00:03:47,520 --> 00:03:49,480
Eric, Derek.
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00:03:49,522 --> 00:03:51,774
Panties, chastity belt.
88
00:03:52,525 --> 00:03:54,485
Dead cat, dead cat.
89
00:03:56,654 --> 00:03:58,198
Oh!
90
00:03:58,239 --> 00:03:59,991
I still got nothing.
91
00:04:06,622 --> 00:04:07,999
Come on, Red.
92
00:04:09,500 --> 00:04:12,754
Bob really wants us to meet
his new lady friend.
93
00:04:12,795 --> 00:04:14,672
Now, think about it, Kitty.
94
00:04:14,714 --> 00:04:17,258
She likes Bob.
95
00:04:20,386 --> 00:04:24,265
I have a hard time believing
this woman even exists.
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00:04:24,306 --> 00:04:25,892
We're gonna get over there,
97
00:04:25,934 --> 00:04:27,852
Bob's gonna be
sitting in a rocker,
98
00:04:27,894 --> 00:04:29,687
with a lady's wig on.
99
00:04:32,857 --> 00:04:34,817
"You look
lovely tonight, Bob."
100
00:04:34,859 --> 00:04:36,402
"So do you, Bob."
101
00:04:38,487 --> 00:04:40,949
You've been working on
that all day, haven't you?
102
00:04:42,742 --> 00:04:43,910
Yeah.
103
00:04:46,662 --> 00:04:51,417
Red, Kitty, I'd like you to meet
a very special lady, Joanne.
104
00:04:51,459 --> 00:04:54,336
Well, Joanne,
it is so nice to meet you.
105
00:04:54,378 --> 00:04:55,671
Right, Red?
106
00:04:55,713 --> 00:04:56,713
We can't stay long.
107
00:04:58,591 --> 00:05:00,301
Ah, Red.
108
00:05:00,342 --> 00:05:02,470
Bob warned me you can be
a pain in the ass.
109
00:05:09,644 --> 00:05:11,122
Well, I'll tell you what.
We'll just have dinner,
110
00:05:11,146 --> 00:05:12,414
and if it turns out
you don't like me,
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00:05:12,438 --> 00:05:14,023
we'll never
invite you over again.
112
00:05:14,065 --> 00:05:16,317
Really? I like you already.
113
00:05:19,028 --> 00:05:21,614
Well, let's get
this barbecue started.
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00:05:21,656 --> 00:05:23,116
Bob, grab that meat.
115
00:05:23,158 --> 00:05:24,951
Oh, I got it, Red.
Why don't you fellas
116
00:05:24,993 --> 00:05:26,327
make a salad?
117
00:05:27,745 --> 00:05:28,997
Salad.
118
00:05:30,706 --> 00:05:31,706
Oh, you're serious?
119
00:05:33,375 --> 00:05:37,964
No, see,
Bob and I do the grilling.
120
00:05:38,006 --> 00:05:40,216
Not this time.
121
00:05:40,258 --> 00:05:42,051
Kitty, you wanna give me a hand?
122
00:05:42,093 --> 00:05:43,613
Well, I'd love to.
Oh, I don't think...
123
00:05:44,971 --> 00:05:47,347
But, Kitty, you might...
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00:05:48,308 --> 00:05:50,392
set your lovely hair on fire.
125
00:05:56,732 --> 00:05:59,359
Well, it can't be that hard.
You do it.
126
00:06:05,449 --> 00:06:08,828
Bob, what
the hell's going on here?
127
00:06:08,870 --> 00:06:10,913
Look, Red,
I really like this woman.
128
00:06:10,955 --> 00:06:12,790
So please,
for today, just shut it.
129
00:06:13,624 --> 00:06:14,625
Shut it?
130
00:06:15,835 --> 00:06:17,337
Good God, Bob!
131
00:06:18,671 --> 00:06:21,423
Is she teaching you
to stand up for yourself?
132
00:06:24,093 --> 00:06:25,887
Yes.
Well, cut it out!
133
00:06:27,972 --> 00:06:30,850
I wanna have a nice time.
Come on.
134
00:06:30,892 --> 00:06:33,519
I'll give you first
dibs on the aprons.
135
00:06:34,854 --> 00:06:38,358
You want the fake tuxedo
or the fake hairy chest?
136
00:06:40,902 --> 00:06:43,071
Oh, damn it.
137
00:06:43,112 --> 00:06:44,906
Gimme the tuxedo!
138
00:06:46,824 --> 00:06:48,617
Hairy chest is
Joanne's favorite.
139
00:06:50,578 --> 00:06:53,122
It's probably
'cause she's got one.
140
00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:04,633
Oh, well, if it isn't the
wielder of the poison pen.
141
00:07:05,843 --> 00:07:07,220
Didn't you like my story?
142
00:07:07,262 --> 00:07:08,554
No. No, I didn't.
143
00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:13,017
That's why I said
"poison pen," not...
144
00:07:13,059 --> 00:07:14,269
"marshmallow pen."
145
00:07:16,062 --> 00:07:17,355
What?
146
00:07:17,397 --> 00:07:18,856
This story is about us.
147
00:07:18,898 --> 00:07:20,691
No, it's not.
148
00:07:20,733 --> 00:07:23,819
You took stuff from our life
and put them in your story.
149
00:07:23,861 --> 00:07:26,530
Like the time you found
those Playboys under my bed.
150
00:07:35,373 --> 00:07:37,499
Be gone, Sir Bonkers.
151
00:07:39,627 --> 00:07:42,630
Derek, look what I
found under your bed.
152
00:07:42,671 --> 00:07:45,716
Lewd renderings
of naked serving wenches.
153
00:07:45,758 --> 00:07:47,635
Did you commission these?
154
00:07:47,676 --> 00:07:50,679
So what if I did?
I have needs, woman.
155
00:07:50,721 --> 00:07:54,016
Now, ready thyself.
On this night, we fornicate.
156
00:07:56,311 --> 00:07:59,105
Okay, well, maybe
there are some similarities.
157
00:07:59,147 --> 00:08:00,522
But that's what writers do.
158
00:08:00,564 --> 00:08:02,191
I mean, we take
stuff from our lives.
159
00:08:02,233 --> 00:08:05,736
Yeah, but you made me mean
all the time and that's mean.
160
00:08:07,405 --> 00:08:09,698
Okay, maybe I
exaggerate some stuff,
161
00:08:09,740 --> 00:08:11,242
'cause, you know,
I'm writing this
162
00:08:11,284 --> 00:08:12,576
for stupid high school girls.
163
00:08:13,535 --> 00:08:16,414
Oh, my God! Great story!
164
00:08:25,631 --> 00:08:27,883
Michael!
165
00:08:27,925 --> 00:08:30,552
Steven just told me that
instead of buying me a dress,
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00:08:30,594 --> 00:08:33,348
you spent my $50 on
this stupid machine.
167
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:36,934
Jackie, I did not.
168
00:08:36,976 --> 00:08:38,519
Oh, yeah, I did.
169
00:08:41,105 --> 00:08:44,566
Jackie, listen.
There's an old saying,
170
00:08:44,608 --> 00:08:46,486
"You buy a girl a dress,
171
00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:48,946
"and she looks
pretty for one night.
172
00:08:48,988 --> 00:08:50,748
"But you buy her boyfriend
a pinball machine,
173
00:08:50,781 --> 00:08:53,034
"and she
looks pretty for life."
174
00:08:55,453 --> 00:08:57,997
Okay, there's another
old saying, Michael.
175
00:08:58,039 --> 00:09:00,749
You're dumb as dirt.
176
00:09:00,791 --> 00:09:03,544
That's true.
That was in the yearbook.
177
00:09:03,585 --> 00:09:06,172
Okay, okay.
All right. Listen, listen.
178
00:09:06,214 --> 00:09:09,467
So, I bought a half stake
in this machine, all right?
179
00:09:09,509 --> 00:09:11,552
So that means for every
quarter I put into it,
180
00:09:11,593 --> 00:09:13,346
I get half back.
181
00:09:13,388 --> 00:09:15,264
That's a 50% profit!
182
00:09:17,392 --> 00:09:20,186
Uh, actually, Kelso,
I think that's a 50% loss.
183
00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:24,815
Fez, I know it's
hard for a foreigner
184
00:09:26,401 --> 00:09:30,446
to understand our
complicated capitalist system.
185
00:09:30,488 --> 00:09:34,116
But we're dealing with quarters
here, not frogs or chickens.
186
00:09:40,664 --> 00:09:43,792
Well, I'm not going to
dignify that with a response.
187
00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:47,713
Because I can't think of one.
188
00:09:49,590 --> 00:09:52,093
But when I do,
a good day to you.
189
00:09:54,053 --> 00:09:55,221
All right, Fez.
190
00:09:55,263 --> 00:09:56,597
I said, kiss my ass.
191
00:10:03,396 --> 00:10:06,023
So, you still mad?
192
00:10:06,065 --> 00:10:08,109
No. No reason to be mad.
193
00:10:08,150 --> 00:10:10,945
Your story is just a pathetic
attempt to rewrite history,
194
00:10:10,986 --> 00:10:12,947
make yourself look good.
195
00:10:12,988 --> 00:10:15,508
I'm pretty sure everyone's gonna
know who the dill-hole is here.
196
00:10:16,576 --> 00:10:18,702
Eric, it's just a story.
197
00:10:18,744 --> 00:10:20,621
No one's gonna think
anybody's a dill-hole.
198
00:10:22,248 --> 00:10:24,041
Cat killer.
Bastard.
199
00:10:26,252 --> 00:10:27,628
Porn freak.
200
00:10:30,548 --> 00:10:33,092
Okay, they could be talking
about anybody.
201
00:10:33,134 --> 00:10:35,761
Hey, we're all
porn-freak bastards,
202
00:10:35,803 --> 00:10:38,556
but he's the only
one who killed a cat.
203
00:10:40,475 --> 00:10:41,976
Okay, okay.
204
00:10:42,017 --> 00:10:43,727
This school
obviously needs to hear
205
00:10:43,769 --> 00:10:45,187
the Eric Forman
version of things,
206
00:10:45,229 --> 00:10:47,982
a.k.a. the truth.
207
00:10:48,023 --> 00:10:49,358
So I'm gonna write my own story.
208
00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:52,278
Yeah. Yeah, that's right.
209
00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:53,760
I'm throwing down
the gauntlet, baby.
210
00:10:54,238 --> 00:10:55,448
Really?
211
00:10:55,490 --> 00:10:58,326
Okay, smarty,
what's a "gauntlet"?
212
00:10:59,619 --> 00:11:01,496
A "gauntlet"?
What's a "gauntlet"?
213
00:11:04,081 --> 00:11:05,666
What's a "gauntlet"?
214
00:11:07,918 --> 00:11:09,670
I don't know,
but it's down, lady.
215
00:11:13,757 --> 00:11:17,637
Boy, this chicken's delish.
What a chef.
216
00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:20,264
You really know
your way around a grill, Joanne.
217
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:23,017
Mine's dry.
218
00:11:25,311 --> 00:11:28,063
No, it isn't.
It's tender and delicious.
219
00:11:28,105 --> 00:11:30,690
Maybe if I chewed
it with some water.
220
00:11:32,360 --> 00:11:33,693
Well, there's the hose.
221
00:11:38,740 --> 00:11:39,740
I don't like her anymore.
222
00:11:40,742 --> 00:11:41,742
Well, I do.
223
00:11:42,744 --> 00:11:46,374
Kitty, I'm chopping vegetables,
224
00:11:46,415 --> 00:11:48,250
Bob's telling me to shut it,
225
00:11:48,292 --> 00:11:52,338
you're over there grilling
with Susan B. Damn Anthony.
226
00:11:53,631 --> 00:11:54,714
Well, fine, Red.
227
00:11:54,756 --> 00:11:56,509
If it bothers you,
we can invite them over,
228
00:11:56,551 --> 00:11:58,260
and you can do the grilling.
229
00:11:58,302 --> 00:12:00,221
But for now,
I'd really appreciate it
230
00:12:00,262 --> 00:12:01,556
if you'd just shut it.
231
00:12:03,807 --> 00:12:05,976
If one more person
tells me to shut it...
232
00:12:06,018 --> 00:12:07,853
What?
You might actually shut it?
233
00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:23,452
Please, Wanda, you
don't have to boil me alive.
234
00:12:23,494 --> 00:12:25,787
Killing your cat
was just a horrible accident.
235
00:12:25,829 --> 00:12:27,747
I know, but I'm a witch.
236
00:12:30,501 --> 00:12:35,297
Dear God, why is a nice,
sensitive guy like me
237
00:12:35,339 --> 00:12:39,594
dating a lying, manipulative
witch like you?
238
00:12:39,635 --> 00:12:43,389
Well, maybe it's because
even witches have itches.
239
00:12:48,728 --> 00:12:50,396
All is forgiven!
240
00:12:56,944 --> 00:12:59,280
God, why do all my
stories end like that?
241
00:13:00,531 --> 00:13:02,617
Don't stop.
I like where you were going.
242
00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:13,085
All right, guys. It is time
to make a withdrawal
243
00:13:13,127 --> 00:13:15,795
from the First
National Bank of Pinball.
244
00:13:24,096 --> 00:13:25,598
Oh, man. No one's playing.
245
00:13:26,432 --> 00:13:27,849
Well, I would've played,
246
00:13:27,891 --> 00:13:31,103
but my frogs and chickens
wouldn't fit into the slot.
247
00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:37,777
All right. I know
what the problem is here.
248
00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:39,212
This thing has been here
for so long that
249
00:13:39,236 --> 00:13:40,476
people have forgotten about it.
250
00:13:41,113 --> 00:13:42,531
I just need to advertise.
251
00:13:42,573 --> 00:13:43,823
So, Jackie, put on a bikini
252
00:13:43,865 --> 00:13:45,200
and stand in front
of the machine.
253
00:13:47,202 --> 00:13:51,206
Michael, I am not wearing a
bikini in here. It would cause a riot.
254
00:13:52,249 --> 00:13:55,002
Okay, what if
I just put up flyers
255
00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,363
with a picture of
you in a bikini?
256
00:13:58,380 --> 00:14:00,716
Yeah, okay. I mean,
it'll still draw a crowd,
257
00:14:00,758 --> 00:14:03,135
but at least
they'll remain orderly.
258
00:14:03,177 --> 00:14:04,720
Okay, so I just need
some Magic Markers
259
00:14:04,762 --> 00:14:06,096
and a picture of you
in a bikini.
260
00:14:07,055 --> 00:14:08,641
Oh. I have one.
261
00:14:12,852 --> 00:14:14,854
Keep it. I have plenty.
262
00:14:18,150 --> 00:14:20,068
So, guys, check out my story.
263
00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:22,571
I passed out a bunch of copies
at lunch today.
264
00:14:22,613 --> 00:14:26,033
Oh, Forman, this kind of thing
always blows up in your face.
265
00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:28,035
Don't ever stop doing it.
266
00:14:31,163 --> 00:14:32,498
What the hell is this?
267
00:14:33,666 --> 00:14:35,584
Oh, you didn't like my story?
268
00:14:37,419 --> 00:14:40,339
Oh, yeah, I loved it.
Especially this part.
269
00:14:42,341 --> 00:14:47,095
Wanda, I have performed every
task thou hath asketh of me.
270
00:14:48,556 --> 00:14:52,059
Please, can we finally
consummate our love?
271
00:14:53,352 --> 00:14:55,604
I beseech you.
272
00:14:55,646 --> 00:14:57,898
Well, I said I would.
So I won't.
273
00:14:59,107 --> 00:15:01,902
But, I beseeched you.
274
00:15:03,529 --> 00:15:04,613
Okay, let's consummate.
275
00:15:04,655 --> 00:15:05,989
Really?
No.
276
00:15:07,533 --> 00:15:09,910
Please. I beseech you.
277
00:15:10,745 --> 00:15:11,953
Okay.
278
00:15:11,995 --> 00:15:13,497
Really?
No.
279
00:15:14,749 --> 00:15:16,834
Now, rub my enormous feet.
280
00:15:22,005 --> 00:15:25,300
Um, guys, I don't understand.
What does "consummate" mean?
281
00:15:27,010 --> 00:15:28,888
It means to have sex.
282
00:15:28,929 --> 00:15:29,930
Really?
283
00:15:31,849 --> 00:15:34,976
Now I have two words for that.
284
00:15:35,018 --> 00:15:37,772
Eric, you just
wrote this to hurt me.
285
00:15:37,813 --> 00:15:40,941
What? I did not.
And, hey, so did you.
286
00:15:42,401 --> 00:15:44,111
Look, when I wrote my story,
287
00:15:44,152 --> 00:15:46,154
I just sat down
and that's what came out.
288
00:15:46,196 --> 00:15:48,365
I didn't, like,
plan it or anything.
289
00:15:48,407 --> 00:15:50,200
And besides...
No, you know what?
290
00:15:50,242 --> 00:15:51,993
I don't have to
explain myself to you.
291
00:15:56,916 --> 00:15:59,376
Okay, I'd like
someone to explain it to me.
292
00:16:00,795 --> 00:16:02,588
Well, that's easy, Fez.
293
00:16:02,630 --> 00:16:05,674
See, Donna, as an artist,
294
00:16:05,716 --> 00:16:08,093
wrote her story to get some
perspective on her life.
295
00:16:08,135 --> 00:16:10,137
And Forman, as a vindictive ass,
296
00:16:12,222 --> 00:16:14,975
wrote his story to
be a vindictive ass.
297
00:16:16,727 --> 00:16:21,022
Oh, Eric, I think you just
consummated yourself.
298
00:16:29,865 --> 00:16:32,117
See what I did there?
Looks easy, but it's not.
299
00:16:35,746 --> 00:16:38,499
Well, steaks are a-cooking.
300
00:16:38,540 --> 00:16:40,334
Mmm.
301
00:16:40,375 --> 00:16:44,797
Ah! What should we have
to go with dinner?
302
00:16:46,047 --> 00:16:49,009
Oh, I know. How about a salad?
303
00:16:52,095 --> 00:16:54,431
Say, Joanne,
why don't you make the salad?
304
00:16:54,473 --> 00:16:55,933
No, thanks.
305
00:16:58,435 --> 00:16:59,520
Aw.
306
00:17:00,521 --> 00:17:02,063
Make the salad.
307
00:17:03,649 --> 00:17:06,109
Unless you don't
like to do lady jobs.
308
00:17:07,528 --> 00:17:09,697
Red, put this in your mouth.
309
00:17:11,114 --> 00:17:13,575
Okay, you know what?
I'll make the salad.
310
00:17:13,617 --> 00:17:15,911
Sit down, Bob.
311
00:17:19,874 --> 00:17:21,124
I'd love to make a salad.
312
00:17:21,166 --> 00:17:22,543
Great.
313
00:17:22,584 --> 00:17:24,646
As soon as Red admits he's
not asking me to make a salad,
314
00:17:24,670 --> 00:17:26,046
he's trying to
put me in my place.
315
00:17:28,799 --> 00:17:31,051
You are woman.
I hear you roar.
316
00:17:35,055 --> 00:17:36,449
I can't believe
you're so threatened
317
00:17:36,473 --> 00:17:39,518
by something as trivial as
me grilling chicken.
318
00:17:39,560 --> 00:17:44,398
It's not trivial. Men grill.
319
00:17:44,439 --> 00:17:47,359
It's been that way
since the first caveman
320
00:17:47,401 --> 00:17:49,945
bonked a woolly
mammoth on the head
321
00:17:50,863 --> 00:17:53,198
and threw it on the barbecue.
322
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:56,076
And his cave
wife made the salad.
323
00:17:59,079 --> 00:18:00,455
I smell something burning.
324
00:18:00,497 --> 00:18:01,790
Oh, darn!
325
00:18:11,216 --> 00:18:13,176
Well, if you didn't
want it well-done,
326
00:18:13,218 --> 00:18:15,387
you should've said something.
327
00:18:17,222 --> 00:18:18,390
What the hell?
328
00:18:20,768 --> 00:18:22,102
Where's my pinball machine?
329
00:18:23,687 --> 00:18:25,397
Oh, where, indeed?
330
00:18:26,565 --> 00:18:27,524
Oh...
331
00:18:27,566 --> 00:18:29,693
I remember.
332
00:18:29,735 --> 00:18:31,028
I convinced the owner
333
00:18:31,070 --> 00:18:33,655
that pinball was out
and Space Invaders was in.
334
00:18:33,697 --> 00:18:37,367
Fez, why would you stab me
in the back like that?
335
00:18:37,409 --> 00:18:39,745
Well, rest assured, Kelso, your
frogs and chickens comment
336
00:18:39,787 --> 00:18:41,705
had nothing to do with it.
337
00:18:43,331 --> 00:18:44,625
Well, why then?
338
00:18:52,382 --> 00:18:53,926
Hey, Eric, we're sorry
339
00:18:53,968 --> 00:18:57,471
we called you a cat-killer
bastard porn freak.
340
00:18:57,512 --> 00:19:00,140
Oh, so, you read my story, huh?
341
00:19:00,181 --> 00:19:01,892
No, we read part
two of Donna's story.
342
00:19:01,934 --> 00:19:03,602
The ending is so beautiful.
343
00:19:05,104 --> 00:19:06,313
Part... Huh?
344
00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:09,608
What?
345
00:19:12,402 --> 00:19:14,529
"And as Wanda walked away,
she knew in her heart
346
00:19:14,571 --> 00:19:17,866
"she would never
stop loving Derek."
347
00:19:17,908 --> 00:19:20,452
Wow, that's good writing.
348
00:19:20,494 --> 00:19:22,997
It's emotional
and it screws you.
349
00:19:31,421 --> 00:19:32,422
Hey.
350
00:19:34,549 --> 00:19:36,343
Hey, so, uh, funny thing.
351
00:19:36,384 --> 00:19:40,263
Um, your story had
a second part, huh?
352
00:19:40,305 --> 00:19:42,724
Yeah, the paper broke it in
half, 'cause it was too long.
353
00:19:43,224 --> 00:19:44,224
Oh.
354
00:19:45,602 --> 00:19:46,728
Well, you know,
355
00:19:46,770 --> 00:19:49,023
maybe my story has
a second part, too.
356
00:19:50,190 --> 00:19:52,317
Eric, your story ended with,
357
00:19:52,359 --> 00:19:54,611
"And he never saw
that crazy bitch again."
358
00:19:58,157 --> 00:20:02,619
Well, you know,
that was just a prequel.
359
00:20:04,038 --> 00:20:06,289
To a story entitled,
360
00:20:06,331 --> 00:20:09,292
uh, "He did see that crazy bitch
again and she was a delight."
361
00:20:13,047 --> 00:20:15,298
Okay, I was pretty
mad when I wrote that.
362
00:20:16,758 --> 00:20:19,553
Eric, I didn't mean
to hurt your feelings,
363
00:20:19,594 --> 00:20:22,681
but, I mean, I guess I was mad
when I wrote mine, too.
364
00:20:22,723 --> 00:20:24,516
At least when I started.
365
00:20:24,558 --> 00:20:25,994
But once I got
all that stuff off my chest,
366
00:20:26,018 --> 00:20:28,228
I mean, I felt better about us.
367
00:20:28,269 --> 00:20:29,749
More like
the second half of my story.
368
00:20:31,356 --> 00:20:33,150
So, uh...
369
00:20:33,192 --> 00:20:36,904
So, what happens
to Derek and Wanda?
370
00:20:36,945 --> 00:20:39,239
Well, in the story, they went
off on their own adventures.
371
00:20:39,740 --> 00:20:41,700
Yeah.
372
00:20:41,742 --> 00:20:43,594
Yeah, I mean, that's,
that's probably good for them.
373
00:20:43,618 --> 00:20:44,912
Yeah.
374
00:20:44,953 --> 00:20:46,747
- It's probably time
they moved on.
- Sure.
375
00:20:47,873 --> 00:20:49,833
Derek's gonna be fine.
376
00:20:50,834 --> 00:20:52,460
He's a smart guy.
377
00:20:53,670 --> 00:20:54,671
The wenches love him.
378
00:20:57,424 --> 00:20:59,093
Yeah, well,
Wanda's gonna do great, too.
379
00:20:59,134 --> 00:21:01,136
Oh, yeah, sure.
380
00:21:01,178 --> 00:21:03,805
And she'll get all
the wenches she wants.
381
00:21:03,847 --> 00:21:05,327
Oh, my God,
Donna, there's your story.
382
00:21:07,059 --> 00:21:08,259
"Wanda and the dirty wenches."
383
00:21:09,561 --> 00:21:10,729
Shut up.
384
00:21:10,771 --> 00:21:11,939
I know. I know.
385
00:21:13,648 --> 00:21:15,067
That's a movie.
386
00:21:21,073 --> 00:21:22,866
Oh, Fez,
387
00:21:22,908 --> 00:21:25,077
I can't hold my feelings
inside any longer.
388
00:21:26,661 --> 00:21:29,123
Yes, we must finally tell you
how much we desire you.
389
00:21:29,164 --> 00:21:30,290
And it's not just us, Fez.
390
00:21:34,669 --> 00:21:36,463
Oh, I knew it all along.
391
00:21:37,839 --> 00:21:39,633
Now let's consummate me.
392
00:21:43,595 --> 00:21:46,014
Oh, boy.
393
00:21:46,056 --> 00:21:47,808
This is the best story ever.
394
00:21:47,832 --> 00:21:49,832
http://hiqve.com/
27537
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